Wonder Woman Pilot

 

             

  Pilot  Review   Wonder  Woman  2011   Directed  by:  Jeffrey  Reiner   Written  by:  David  E.  Kelley     Reviewed  by:  Neil  Vagg   Review  date:  31/07/2011    

 

Wonder  Woman  Pilot  Review  

31/07/2011  

2011/2012  Pilot  Show  Review:    

©Neil  Vagg  

WONDER  WOMAN  (as  yet  unaired)  

Even   if   you've   spent   the   first   half   of   2011   living   under   a   rock   I'm   sure   you   will   have   heard   about  the  potential  new  Wonder  Woman  TV  series  originally  due  to  be  hitting  our  screens   sometime   during   either   the   2011/2012   or   2012/2013   season   and   unless   that   rock   was   seriously  heavy  you  will  also  know  that  this  series  is  now  all  but  dead  and  unlikely  to  ever   see  the  light  of  day  short  of  a  special  DVD  release  or  Comic  Con  screening.  

  (title  card  as  seen  in  the  episode)  

Being  a  comic  book  fan  myself,  although  not  a  reader  of  the  on-­‐going  Wonder  Woman  title,  I   had  high  hopes  for  seeing  another  of  the  DC  Comics  A-­‐list  brought  to  the  small  screen  in  an   enjoyable   fashion   (especially   having   recently   decided   to   give   Smallville   a   second   chance)   although   disappointed   at   the   loss   of   a   potential   WW   movie   at   the   hands   of   Buffy   the   Vampire  Slayer  creator  Joss  Whedon.   My   (and   many   others)   first   disappointment   with   this   series   came   with   the   announcement   that   Ally   McBeal   creator   David   E.   Kelley   would   be   the   showrunner.   I   have   nothing   against   McBeal   and   her   dancing   baby   personally   but   it   was   just   not   a   show   that   I   found   myself   particularly   interested   in   and   in   terms   of   any   adaptation   of   Wonder   Woman   under   his   guide   it  rang  alarm  bells  regarding  the  essential  action  elements  the  show  would  require.   My   second   disappointment,   one   that   was   echoed   by   a   huge   cross   section   of   the   general   public  and  fans  of  the  character  alike,  came  with  the  release  of  the  first  photo  of  lead  actress   Adrianne   Palicki   (Supernatural)   in   costume  –   through   the   course   of   this   shows   short   lifespan   this   is   has   been   a   topic   for   heated   debate   and   one   which   we   will   come   back   to   during   my   thoughts  on  the  pilot  episode  itself.   As   the   pilot   story   and   premise   of   the   show   began   to   leak   it   seemed   like   this   was   going   to   be   a   badly   modernised   version   of   the   character   which   would   focus   more   on   the   personal   struggles   and   integration   of   Wonder   Woman   in   to   a   mass   media   culture.   Shortly   after   this   set   videos   and   photos   began   to   leak   and   excitement   continued   to   dwindle.   Throw   in   the   casting   of   Elizabeth   Hurley   as   the   villain   and   unfortunately   this   show   was   marked   for   cancellation  very  early  in  its  inception.     Doomed  from  the  outset  the  show  was  initially  passed  on  by  all  the  major  US  TV  networks   before  finding  a  short  stay  home  on  NBC  upon  its  second  trip  round  the  executive  shopping   trolleys  and  for  a  while  things  were  starting  to  look  up  for  the  Amazonian  princess.  

2  

Wonder  Woman  Pilot  Review  

31/07/2011  

©Neil  Vagg  

We’ll  probably  never  know  for  sure  but  either  the  poor  test  scores  from  audience  screenings   of   the   sheer   amount   of   anti-­‐WW   internet   buzz   killed   this   show   off   before   the   pilot   was   even   finished  and  for  a  time  it  seemed  that  we  would  never  see  the  show  that  was  being  singled   out  as  one  of  the  worst  pilots  in  recent  memory  by  the  media.   But  alas  first  several  small  clips  appeared  online  and  just  days  later  a  full  copy  of  the  episode,   featuring   unfinished   effects,   scratch   dialogue   and   probably   only   temporary   music   arrived   online  and  straight  to  my  TV  screen.  

  (you  wouldn’t  like  her  when  she’s  angry)  

The   premise   of   this   show   takes   a   different   approach   from   that   which   any   fan   of   the   character   –   devoted   or   casual  –   will   be   accustomed   to.   There   are   no   scenes   of   Amazonian   women   fighting   for   the   chance   to   travel   to   the   US   of   A   in   order   to   return   the   injured   war   pilot   Major   Steve   Trevor   to   his   homeland.   There’s   no   baby   sculpted   from   the   sands   of   Themiscyra.  In  this  reworking  the  titular  character  is  the  owner  of  Themiscyra  Industries,  a   company   who   aren’t   actually   seen   to   do   anything   but   create   Wonder   Woman   related   merchandise  and  give  Diana  moral  support  upon  her  victorious  battle  with  the  evil  CEO  of   rival   company   Cale-­‐Anderson   Pharmaceuticals   -­‐   rounds   of   applause   for   her   seem   to   be   compulsory  upon  starting  employment  at  their  offices.     The   general   public   are   aware   of   Wonder   Woman   and   also   that   her   alter   ego   is   Diana   Themiscyra   but   what   they   are   not   aware   of   is   the   alter   ego   within   the   alter   ego…   Diana   Prince  (Diana  T  with  her  hair  tied  back  and  added  glasses).  Neither  of  the  Diana’s  receives   much  in  the  way  of  character  development  during  this  pilot  outside  of  a  few  scarce  scenes   with   Steve   (Justin   Buening  –   Knight   Rider).   In   fact   I’m   not   sure   which   of   the   Diana’s   it   was   that  Steve  was  dating  but  based  on  her  glamorous  appearance  in  these  scenes  it  must  have   been   Themiscyra   and   not   Prince.   So   essentially   we   have   Diana   T   who   is   a   not-­‐so-­‐secret   identity   and   basically   just   a   name   to   use   for   Wonder   Woman   out   of   costume   and   Diana   P   who  sits  at  home  with  her  cat  whilst  browsing   Facebook,  I’m  not  sure  which  one  to  care  for   less.  

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Wonder  Woman  Pilot  Review  

31/07/2011  

©Neil  Vagg  

  (every  super  heroine  needs  a  support  system)  

The   daily   running   of   Themiscyra   Industries   is   left   to   Diana   T/WW   confidant   Henry   Johns   (Cary   Elwes   –   Twister)   who   seems   to   be   the   voice   of   reason   amongst   the   Diana’s.   There’s   also  trusty  PA  Etta  Candy  (Tracie  Thoms  –  The  Devil  Wears  Prada)  who  fulfils  the  role  of  best   friend  and  probably  only  friend  to  Diana.   These   two   characters   appear   quite   frequently   throughout   the   pilot,   usually   together,   in   order  to  deal  with  Diana’s  mood  and  to  provide  the  voice  of  reason  whilst  the  become  hell   bent  on  solving  the  lacklustre  mystery  that  provides  the  plot.   Both  actors  do  a  fine  job  of  shoring  up  Palicki  in  the  lead  role  and  given  time  for  the  series  to   develop  these  characters  could  have  become  a  very  tight  knit  group  and  offered  a  very  true   human   element   in   a   fantasy-­‐tinged   show.   Etta   is   perhaps   the   less   generic   of   the   two   characters  here,  especially  when  compared  to  her  1970s  TV  counterpart.  Henry,  although  a   compassionate   and   strong   voice   amongst   the   crowd,   is   a   very   generic   male   secondary   character  that  could  easily  have  been  retooled  by  the  time  this  show  came  to  air.   Perhaps  the  biggest  of  the  character  cock-­‐ups  in  this  show  is  that  of  Steve  Trevor.  Anybody   with  a  knowledge  of  Lynda  Carter  era  Wonder  Woman  will  know  that  Steve  Trevor  was  the   army   pilot   who’s   crash   landing   on   Themiscyra   was   the   reason   for   Diana   to   travel   to   America   in  the  first  place.  Jump  on  to  the  final  season  of  the  show  and  Steve  Jnr  is  an  agent  working   alongside  Diana  at  the  IADC.   Here  Steve  is  nothing  more  than  a  mere  plot  device  by  which  to  aggravate  one  of  the  various   Diana’s  and  make  her  more  human.  Quite  early  on  in  the  story  we  learn  that  Diana  (both  of   them)  are  lonely  spinsters  who  have  recently  gone  through  a  breakup  with  lover  Steve.  We   are   witness   to   their   breakup   via   flashback   scenes   with   the   two   of   them   having   dinner   together   at   a   restaurant   where   it   transpires   that   it   was   probably   her   life   as   Wonder   Woman   which  took  Diana  away  from  the  love  of  her  life.   I   don’t   want   to   spoil   the   ending   of   this   pilot   for   anybody   who   has   yet   to   see   it   but   his   introduction  into  the  cast  as  a  major  player  is  more  like  something  from  an  episode  of  90210   than  a  performance  expected  in  a  serious  comic  book  adaption.    

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Wonder  Woman  Pilot  Review  

31/07/2011  

©Neil  Vagg  

  (steve  trevor  –  lover  or  loser?)  

The   second   biggest   mistake   made   by   Kelley   here   is   Veronica   Cale   (Liz   Hurley   –   Austin   Powers).  I  would  only  be  stating  fact  but  she  is  not  the  strongest  actress  when  it  comes  to   serious   material   but   luckily   this   pilot   and   the   word   serious   do   not   belong   in   the   same   sentence  and  as  such  she  becomes  par  for  the  course  in  terms  of  character.  Whether  Cale   would   have   been   used   beyond   this   pilot   is   unknown   as   an   episode   order   was   never   discussed   and   the   term   big   bad   is   not   mentioned   but   no   amount   of   development   could   save   this  character  from  being  a  villain  of  the  week.   In  fact  watching  her  character  does  nothing  but  evoke  feelings  of  watching  Sharon  Stone  in   the   Catwoman   movie   but   if   that   doesn’t   put   you   off   watching   this   pilot   nothing   will.   In   a   similar   vein   I   think   the   same   people   behind   that   slashed   vinyl   pants   and   belt   bra-­‐top   costume  that  Halle  Berry  wore  must  have  crafted  WW’s  costume.  

  (the  'I  mean  business'  face)  

We  all  saw  that  original  photo  with  the  shiny  blue  trousers  and  the  blue  boots  (linked  above)   and  gasped  in  horror:  no  starred  hotpants?  No  red  boots?  Shiny  material?  There  were  many,  

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Wonder  Woman  Pilot  Review  

31/07/2011  

©Neil  Vagg  

many   questions   about   the   horror   that   was   that   first   image   but   I   can   gladly   tell   you   that   particular  costume  makes  only  the  briefest  of  appearances  in  the  pilot  itself.   In  the  opening  sequence  the  blue  trousers  appear  but  they’re  not  the  shiny  ones  seen  in  the   released   image   and   likewise   the   boots   are   red.   It   would   appear   the   blue   booted   costume   was   used   for   a   photo   shoot   for   some   WW   advertising   that   appears   in   the   background   of   the   Themiscyra  Industries  conference  room  (see  below  image).     When  WW  lands  one  of  her  various  stealth  crafts  on  the  roof  of  the  building  her  trousers  are   the   dark   blue   ones   which   will   become   the   must   used   in   the   pilot   but   once   she   exits   the   elevator   into   the   building   the   shiny   trousers   appear   under   (without   the   blue   boots)   an   on   screen   message   of   ‘VFX   MISSING   –   PANTS   TO   BE   DARKENED’   so   at   least   we   know   the   production  team  were  listening  to  fan  complaints  above  the  outfit.   The   costume   comes   across   as   overly   plastic-­‐y   and   I   don’t   just   mean   the   vinyl   corset.   The   headband  and  belt  look  like  they’  come  straight  off  your  Halloween  speciality  store  costume   shelf   and   throughout   the   pilot   I   expected   to   see   them   bouncing   or   moving   like   they   were   about  to  fall  off,  I  was  pleasantly  surprised  when  they  didn’t.   The  wristbands  also  have  an  air  of  off-­‐the-­‐shelf  about  them.  They  don’t  look  like  they’ll  be   stopping  bullets  any  time  soon;  they  do  however  get  the  chance  to  do  so  very  briefly  in  the   climactic  moments  of  the  show.   As  you  will  see  from  the  above  image  the  hotpants  do  make  an  appearance  in  the  show  by   the  end.  There’s  no  real  discussion  about  why  different  costumes  are  worn  at  different  times   although   a   conversation   does   take   place   between   Diana   and   Etta   regarding   the   fact   her   costume  was  designed  in  order  to  help  sell  action  figures.   Speaking  of  which:  I  do  not  agree  with  mass  media  WW…  

  (‘I  never  approved  this…  these  breasts  are  ridiculous…  I  never  said  to  merchandise  my  tits!’)  

Perhaps   the   truest   line   spoken   in   the   pilot   is   by   Etta   when   she   says   ‘Wonder   Woman   isn’t   vulgar’  but  this  is  sadly  followed  up  by  a  couple  of  uses  of  the  word  ‘tits’  and  also  the  word   ‘ass’  in  describing  the  Amazonian  woman  –  the  only  reference  to  her  background.   You  can  poke  holes  in  much  of  this  pilot  but  the  scenes  discussing  the  mass  marketing  of  the   Wonder   Woman   brand   make   for   some   of   the   most   cringe   inducing   watching.   Diana   sits   with   her  creative  team  to  discuss  the  impending  launch  of  a  new  WW  doll  and  how  her  anatomy  

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Wonder  Woman  Pilot  Review  

31/07/2011  

©Neil  Vagg  

has  been  oversized  to  help  increase  sales.  I  completely  understand  the  point  of  this  scene  as   Diana  stands  up  for  what   she  believes  in  and  opposes  modifying  the  female  form  in  order  to   boost   sales   but   it’s   completely   unnecessary   as   the   character   of   WW   shouldn’t   need   to   be   seen   to   define   her   strength   of   character,   it’s   just   part   of   who   she   is   but   here   it’s   watered   down  and  offered  to  us  as  an  extremely  obvious  plot  device.   The  above  use  of  vulgar  language  is  part  of  a  very  clichéd  and  derivative  script  that  I’m  told   is  drastically  improved  over  some  leaked  pages  from  several  months  ago.  Like  much  of  the   rest   of   this   pilot   there   is   no   depth   to   what   is   being   said.   Every   word   is   spoken   with   true   determination  –  Liz  Hurley  included  –  but  there  is  not  much  room  for  emotion  here.   Both   Diana   T/WW   and   Veronica   Cale   are   often   seen   to   monologue,   as   heroes   and   villains   invariably  do,  but  it  all  falls  flat  without  a  convincing  cause  to  fight  for.   The   best   lines   appeared   to   be   saved   for   Etta,   who   radically   becomes   the   most   human   and   believable  character  in  the  whole  show.  She  would  most  definitely  be  one  to  watch  out  for  if   the  show  were  to  continue.  

  (obligatory  police  detective  foil…  who  was  he  exactly?)  

Earlier  on  you’ll  remember  that  I  mentioned  my  reservations  of  David  E.  Kelley  helming  this   project,   as   I   was   unaware   of   his   ability   to   handle   action   scenes.   You’ll   also   notice   I   have   mentioned  any  action  scenes  as  yet  and  that  is  because  there  aren’t  many  here.   This  episode  opens  with  a  kind  of  double  teaser:  one  which  makes  you  say  ‘what  the  f***?’   followed   by   another   which   makes   you   say   ‘why   wasn’t   that   the   teaser?’   so   leaving   aside   the   WTF  element  of  the  pre-­‐title  card  sequence  lets  look  at  our  first  action  scene.   WW  is  chasing  down  what  looks  like  an  Observer  from  Fringe  in  his  civvies;  she’s  running  the   streets,  jumping  on  and  even  being  knocked  down  by  cars  but  she  doesn’t  stop  chasing  her   prey.  There’s  a  serious  push  to  show  that  Kelley’s  WW  doesn’t  stop  for  anything  when  she  is   after   her   man   and   that   is   a   theme   which   runs   throughout   the   show.   There’s   also   anger   to   this  incarnation  that  is  a  little  misplaced  here  but  not  unwelcome.   This   unfinished   version   shows   off   some   wires   whilst   WW   is   leaping   down   some   stairs   but   overall   it’s   well   shot   and   well   edited   and   there’s   a   reasonable   sense   of   tension.   It’s   also   nice   to  see  that  instead  of  some  awful  suiting  up  introduction  a  la  Joel  Schumacher  era  Batman   or  a  simple  action  stance  we  are  first  show  WW  as  she’s  in  mid-­‐sprint  and  ready  for  a  fight.  

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Wonder  Woman  Pilot  Review  

31/07/2011  

©Neil  Vagg  

We  also  see  the  golden  lasso  quite  early  on  here,  one  of  several  appearances,  but  sadly  the   effects   have   not   been   completed   so   it   can   look   very   fake   at   times.   However   you   get   the   overall   impression   that   this   WW   is   gong   to   be   badass   and   her   actions   are   going   to   well   represented.   Jump   ahead   to   the   utterly   cliché   climactic   battle   with   the   drugged   up   goons   of   Cale-­‐ Anderson   Pharmaceuticals   and   the   action   is   presented   very   differently.   Firstly   we   are   granted   the   cheesy   suiting   up   scenes   with   the   headband,   wristbands   and   lasso   (note   the   blue   boots   are   in   the   background   of   this   scene)   and   before   kicking   beefcake   ass   WW   takes   a   very  Lynda  Carter  –esque  stance.   The  actual  fight  itself  is  between  WW  and  twenty  drugs  induced  super  soldiers  who  look  like   they’ve  just  left  the  gym  (according  to  the  only  goon  with  a  speaking  role,  by  count  there’s   him  and  nine  extras)  and  does  sadly  show  off  some  of  the  wires  used  to  help  accentuate  the   action.   The   choreography   is   very   hand-­‐to-­‐hand   with   Palicki’s   WW   throwing   punches,   high   kicking   and   using   her   lasso   to   throw   the   goons   around   like   dolls.   It’s   a   far   cry   from   Lynda   Carter  and  fits  the  modern  setting  far  better  than  simply  tossing  the  bad  guys  around.     The   scene   is   purposely   shot   and   lit   to   allow   Palicki’s   face   to   be   seen,   she   clearly   did   some   of   the   fighting   herself,   but   also   to   allow   stunt   performers   to   take   over   and   do   some   of   the   bigger   portions   without   being   easily   given   away.   The   overall   allusion   is   of   a   pretty   grissly   dogfight   and   a   very   pleasant   surprise   amongst   some   of   the   awful   dialogue.   Had   this   show   made   it   to   air   then   there   was   every   chance   that   it   would   have   appealed   to   a   wider   audience   than  a  show  more  reflective  of  Lynda  Cater’s  WW  would.   Here  we’re  faced  with  one  of  my  more  serious  issues  with  the  pilot:  WW  kills.  

  (here  is  where  I  tried  very  hard  not  to  insert  a  job  about  the  actor  having  other  roles  in  the  pipeline…)  

I  only  noticed  a  body  count  of  two  in  this  pilot:  a  goon  used  to  shield  WW  from  the  bullets  of   the   above   guard   whom   she   through   a   pipe   at.   But   where   Batman   and   Superman   are   regularly  shown  to  have  strong  beliefs  when  it  comes  to  murder  on  the  job  this  WW  has  no   issue  with  taking  out  a  guard  at  a  moments  notice.   If   this   show   had   been   picked   up   I   would   have   expected   the   anger   which   clearly   lies   only   just   beneath  the  surface  of  both  WW  and  Diana  T  would  be  explored  and  developed  because  it  is   clearly   an   issue   which   Etta   and   Henry   are   concerned   with   and   her   determination   to   take   down  Veronica  Cale  is  as  murderous  as  any  comic  book  villain.  

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Wonder  Woman  Pilot  Review  

31/07/2011  

©Neil  Vagg  

Beyond  this  I’m  not  sure  what  further  exploration  could  be  offered  to  us  beyond  the  pilot,   there’s   no   overarching   mystery   involved   as   WW   instead   of   investigating   the   reason   for   Cale-­‐ Anderson’s  drug  trials  just  takes  out  the  boss  and  goes  home  to  find  Steve  waiting  for  her.   There’s   a   brief   moment   between   our   three   Themiscyra   leads   which   alluded   to   a   sense   of   family  which  needs  to  be  exploited  further  to  make  the  audience  care  but  short  of  Steve’s   closing  statement  there  is  nothing  in  this  pilot  to  follow-­‐up  in  later  episodes.   Ending  the  episode  we  return  to  the  redundant  Diana  P’s  home  to  sit  at  her  computer  join   the   rest   of   the   world   in   becoming   a   member   of   Facebook.   We   get   it:   she’s   trying   to   be   normal.  

  (Diana  P…  she’s  just  a  normal  girl)  

I’m   going   to   make   a   controversial   statement   and   say   that   this   pilot   is   actually   not   as   bad   as   I   was  expecting.  Knowing  that  there  is  currently  no  show  to  follow  it  up  with  and  bring  further   disappointment  meant  I  could  enjoy  it  for  what  it  is:  pure  fluff.  There’s  nothing  serious  here,   nothing   beyond   a   shallow   one-­‐off   superhero   adventure   and   nothing   that   wouldn’t   have   been  a  massive  hit  with  audiences  in  perhaps  the  1970s.   Would  I  like  to  have  seen  more  episodes?  Yes,  I  think  I  would  like  to  see  at  least  a  second   episode  to  see  if  Kelley  had  a  plan  for  where  a  season  of  this  show  would  go  as  it  doesn’t   feel   like   any   groundwork   has   been   laid   for   anything   other   than   a   TV   movie.   Sadly   this   episode  only  clocks  in  at  41mins  40secs  so  unless  there’s  a  lot  on  the  cutting  room  floor  it’s   never  going  to  make  a  TV  movie.  Then  again  if  it  was  deemed  bad  enough  to  cut  out  of  this   edit  I  don’t  think  it  should  be  seen  at  all.   There’s  some  reasonable  action,  some  appalling  dialogue  and  laughable  temporary  VFX  but   Wonder  Woman  is  not  unwatchable.  For  a  rough  edit  it  appears  to  be  well  executed  if  you   can  ignore  a  hospital  scene  with  changeable  lighting  depending  on  the  camera  angle.  I  would   still  be  interested  to  see  a  finished  version  to  see  the  show  how  Kelley  had  intended.   If   you   get   the   chance   to   see   this,   even   just   once,   I   recommend   you   take   that   chance   and   see   what  was  perhaps  never  meant  to  be  seen.     2.5/5  

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