The Bystanders Fragments From France

June 20, 2016 | Author: Druid_ian | Category: N/A
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Fr\gments "France

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FRAGMENTS FROM FRANCE By

CAPTAIN 'BR VCR

"BAIRNSFATHRR

PUBLISHED nr

"THE BYSTANDER" TAIJ.IS

HOUSE, Wnni-KRIARS STREET, &

LONDON

190,

STRAND

"



n

The (ollowing

sul)iccts

can be obtained

in

colours from the Publisher, "The Bystander, Tallis

House, Whitefriars, E.G.,

post Iree

1/-

1/3:

"Where Tliat

did that one go to?"

E\'enmg Star-shell."

"No possible doubt \vhate\'er." A Maxiui Mulrr."

^HKX

Tomiin- went oui lo llu- great war, he went smiling, the latest (lilt\- of the halls. The eneu))scowled. War, said his professors of kultur and Ins

and

singing

h\ mnsters of hate, could never

be waged

in

and the nation that sent to the front sang and lauglu'd must be the vcr)- decadent England along denounced as unworthy of world-power. spirit,

I

fear the eneni)- will be even

the pages of this book.

war

In

it

the

the Tipperary soldiers tlie>-

who

had

all

more

infuriated

spirit

of the British citizen soldier,

when he

turns over

he hated hell, flocked to the colours to have his whack at the apostles of blood and iron, is translated to cold and permanent print. Here is the great war reduced to grim and gruesome absurdit\-. It is not fun poked b)- a mere looker-on, it is the fun felt in the war by one who has been through it. wlio, hating

as

Captain Bruce Bairnsfather has stayed at that " farm " which is portrayed in the double page of the book he has endured that shellswept " 'ole " that is depicted on the cover he has watched the disappearance of that " bhnkm' parapet " shown on one page; has had his hair cut under lire as shown on another. And having been through It all, he has just put down what he has seen and ;

;

iieard

and

— laughed

felt

and smelt and

at.

Captain Bairnsfather went to the front in no mood of a " chief takin' notes." It was

the notes that took him. Bel ore the war, some time a regular soldier, some time an engineer, he had little other idea than to sketch for mischief, on walls

and shirt cuflPs, and tablecloths. Without the war he might never have put pencil to paper for publication.

But the

\v;ii-

insisted. It

IS

mere vogue in Xaturall)' I hope it

not

for

his

editor lo forecast Ins posterity. (4^

Wll C'tmera Portrait.

CAPTAIN HKICH BAIRNSFATHER.

Hopf;^

will

a

be a

letter

France "

lasting one, but

which

reached

am

prejudiced. Let me, lio\ve\er, quote Captain Hainishither from somewhere in I

:

Twenty

more potent admirable

>'ears after peace has been declared there will be no stimulus to the recollections of an old soldier than )our sketches of trench life. Ma>- I, with all deference,

congratulate you on your humour, )our fidelity, )our somethmg-else not easily defined I mean \oui- power of expressing in black and white a condition of mind."



I hope that this forecast is If this sketch book is a true one. worth)- to outlast the days of the war, and to be kept for remembrance on the shel\-es of those who have lu'ed through it, it will ha\e done Its bit. For will It not be a staiuhng reminder of the iiiglor/ousness of

war,

Its

preposterous absurdlt\-, and of

tiie affairs

ol

nations

its

futilit\-

as a

means

of settling

'r

When

the ardent Jingo of the da\- after to-morrow rattles tlie there be somewhere hanch- a copy of " P^-agments from France" that can be opened in front ol him, at any page, just to remind him o( wliat war is realK- like as it is fought in "ci\'ilised" times.

sabre,

let

The EnrroR

Where

IN U.M'. Ul'

I^O

HI'.

to Live-rADVT.

111-. CIIOICIM I.OCAl.l NOKIIIIKN FliANCI-.. I

I.I-.T (three min'itcii

•*

The Bystander.

oi

from Ovriiinn

wi-:i,i,-iiuii.i'

I

lis Ol-

(rcnclics), thin nttrnclivc

iiiid

ijue.-our.

one rcci-rlion-kilchcn-heilrtioin nnti UP-'I"0-|)ATI'; FUNK HOLIi (4ft hy .Ht.J. nil inr>ili-iii iiictiiivcnienccii. inclitiliilK ifnil nnd wnlcr. Thi« dctimhlc Krvijrnce itiind* ime foot above wnlcr level, coininandiiitt (in cnntnininil

CKCellenI view

tif llic

rneinv Irenche*

UXCliLI.KNr SHOOIING (SNIPK AND DUCK). — I'articuUra o( the Tcniinl. Konm 6, llaic Hoapilnl. Iloiilniine

" 'The Bystander's" Frn(!menls from France.

"

Where

did that one go to ?

"The Bystander's" Fragments from France.

Where j\)iig News, hits Edinburgh the towards sentiment true the Bairnsfather of the Army in

France when he writes

"To

us out here

:

the 'Fragments'

We

are the very quintessence of Hfe.

sit

moping over a smoky charcoal fire in a Suddenly someone, more widedug-out. the awake than others, remembers we and comes, Out it E'ragments.' For picture. each over uproariously laugh '

are

tragic

see is

the very

these not

every

witnessing

humour

on the

The fed-up

?

we are

things

day, incidents

of

full

spirit

you

faces of Hairnsfather's pictures



a sham a mask beneath which there something that is essentially British."

lies

recommunication a In ceived by Captain Bairnsfather

an eminent

ment writes

:

Member of Parlia" You are rising to the situation, just factor in the

be a factor

in

as Gillray

was a

The differNapoleonic wars." ence is, however, that instead of turning

his

exclusively

satire

upon the enemy, as did Captain

Bairnsfather

—aood-humouredly his fellow-warriors.

Gillray,

turns

his



always on This habit

of ours of making fun of ourselves has come by now to be fairly well understood by even the most sensitive and serious-minded of

CAPTAIN I

hit picture

from

the

•'Btriiiht

German off

liRUCli

the

IIAIKNSFATHRR

the iToiit. less ihon a qunrlerof a mile Captain Bairnsfather has come trenches.

"OS taken

at

wearing a fur coat, a Balaclava is Immediately behind him is a hole mode

muj," and

helmet, and gum-boots.

by

a

"Jack Johnson"

shell

friends and neighbouis. hardly needs nowadays It pointed out that it is a fixed condition of the national life that wherever Britons are working together in any common object, whether in school, college, profession, or even warfare, they must never appear to be Those who know us and who, regarding their occupation too seriously. nowadays, has the excuse for not knowing us, seeing how very much we have been discussed ? understand that our frivolity is apparent and not real. Because we have the gift of laughter, we are no less appreciative of grim realities than are our scowling enemies, and nobody knows that better enemies themselves. in these davs than those scowliny t>

our

to

continental

be





Their hymns of hate and prayers for punishment have been impotent expressions of exasperation at our coolness, deliberation and inflexible determiqualities they had deluded themselves before the war into believing nation would prove all a sham before the first blast of frightfulness. They told themselves that, a war once actually begun, the imperturbable pipe-smoking More complete John Bull would be transformed Into a cowering craven. confusion of this false belief is nowhere to be found than in these two volumes German defeat that successive of " Fragments." It ranks as a colossal land, sea and air should produce a Bairnsfather, bloodthirsty assaults upon us by depicting the "contemptible little Army," swollen out of all recognition, settling humorously down to war as though it were the normal business of life.



"

Fed up"? Yes, that is the word by which to describe, if you like, the But the kind of weariness prevalent Bairnsfather expression of countenance. he depicts is the reverse of the kind that implies "give up." Au contraire, tries amis! The "fed-up" Bairnsfather man is a fixture, "/'y suis,'" he might Je vouJrais que je tiy sois exclaim, if he spoke French, "^/ il membete guefysuis. pas.

Mais jy

suis,

et,

mes bans camarades, par

tons les dieux, 'fy reste !

"

read in the words " fed up " a sign that our tenacity is giving out, he reads it wrong; grim will be the disillusionment of any hopes he may build upon his misreading, and even grimmer the anger of those whom he may have deluded. If the

enemy should

These verdammte Engliindcr are never what they seem, but are always something unpleasantly different. We are the Great Enigma of the war, and Let us be careful not to lose it. in our mystery lies our greatest strength. Those who would have us simplify ourselves upon the continental model, and present to the world a picture of sombre seriousness, are asking us to change Cromwell asked the painter to paint him, " warts and our national character. And who would take the Bairnsfather sketches us smiles and all. all." smiles off the " dials " of the figures you will see on the pages that follow



.''

" The Bystander's

"

Fragments from Frnncc

The Dud " Give

it

a

Shell

good 'ard

'un, if

— Or

the Fuse-Top Collector

'em you can generally 'ear Bert " they are a-goin' to explode ;

fizzing

a bit

first

"The

^CUvixq|Cte[

Bystander's" Fragments from France

^

What's

all this

about unmarried

men

?

"The

Bystander's" Fragments from France

That Hat "Pop

out and get" it, Bert " Pop out yerself

"

Tbe "

Bystaoder's " Fragments Irom France

Springtime in Flanders " Personally, I think tliis is just what you want for layinji your cjr su^gu,^

Exhilarator

and 7f.fe///«^."-( Extract torn

Orpheus, does

his best, but finds

it

a

"Military Manual.")

uphill

work at

times

"The

16

Bystander's" Fragments from

France

The Nest "'Ere,

when you're

finished.

clean

I'll

the

borrow

(hat

there

knives with."

top note of

yours to

:

'

The Bystander's

"

17

Fragments from France

Immediate and Important! as when he hands moment unsuitable an his Captain the following message at upper the shave to ranks all of tendency "The G.O.G. notices with regret the forthwith" cease must practice This lip.

Never has Private Smith's

face felt so large

what he

and smooth feels

is

The Bystander's

!8

;i"^^ Lieut

Fragments from France

7. Smitk, St thetakint} ot"aeaLd-(3i^"fa.Tm

''Come on yoii chajos' lOhicK

"

side their



Well brea^d's

shoiu these

s

bu-treTed!"

Other Times, Other The Decline

of I^oetry

;iiul

'

Manners

Koinijnce

in

War

The

Bystanaer's " Fragments from l-'rancj

Happy Memories "What

of the

Zoo

time do thev Feed the Sea-Lions,

Alf ?

" Ine Bystander's

2o

'

Fragments from France

Observation ''Ave

a

s(|iilnl

lliroiij^li

you can see one of (he as anythin clear a sausage as

these ere, Bill

;

'

-'s

eatin'

The Bystander's

"

FrafSmenls from

Letting

Himself

Down

to remove the elastic band prior to descent, Herr Franz feels that the trial exhibition of his new parachute is a failure

Having omitted Flopp

21

I'riince

von

22

Old Saws There

is

ccrlainly

a

lot

of

— " The

New M

and (riilh

Bystander':

in

that

Napn

J

^Pflients from France

i^s

23

By

Bairnsfather

m axim, "An army

moves on

its

stomach"

I

he Bystander's " Fragments from

France

24

His Dual Obsession Ilerr l^Vilz von >^''iMcrshHtcr Osvin^i K. Ihc Ircq.Knt recurrence of this dream. (Jive up sausage late at nif^ht and has ciecided to lake liis friends' advice Army next sprmj? br.xKl less upon lie possible si/.e of the Hrilish :

I

.

The Bystander's

"

25

Fragments from France

^^

\

^^

The Communication Trench Problem— Whether

to

walk along the top and

risk

it,

or do another mile of this

— "The

26

Valuable bVa^mcnt from Mandcrs

:

It

Bystander's" Fragments from France

All Coincs to Tliis in

Time

intcrcslin^ Iraf^nicnt, fouiul iic;ir "^ prcs (known to the ancients as Wipers), throws a li^ht on a suhjecl wliich has lon>^ puzzled science, i.e., what was the origin and nic.;niii>^ ol tliosc immense /.iM/;>M s''>ay d-gpaiTf fa' menr,

ir^frer T«sc$iTches, \W9 invented

anetv

bomb

KICK Steven TaiTbTdThCT

3icK

shoius his n£u)

borpb

tuho decides lb use 'Bal

ov«Th

Ccneral

RvrtII

Ft-^nders Film

unuiitinit

me

the offgnsiv<

of R»vrt

VIIL foT-nr<

to

m

vcm by

7\wiAN "Black

adv«KTuTl)

Jff J^

M-^

^-^X

//^

Ihc Cjtntral

having heatd

"thc^T

^toty, oTders the ATretfT ^

;()r

HIS

of

C.l.tam-^hy;^

g)

STAR

fihii of the Amcricun naiurcd sarcasm bcfittiiifj a master of itself with breathless enthusiasm

cliuractcristic

,^

in

h shown with tht |y

po*t from the Makert.

Kingdom

3d.

extra.

To

Expeditionary

and Imperial Postage, 4d. extra.

I/-

Illustrated

MABIE,

TODD &

CO.,

Catalogue post free on request.

Ltd.,

79-80,

H^h

Jlolborn,

London,

W.C.

i.

ChMpMtle, E.C. ;9SA and km. Regent Street, W., I ondon 3, Kxchance Succl.'.M.inchertcr: Fans, Zunch, bydney, Toronio, &c. LendOB Faetory—319-839, Weit«a Street 8 E. AssocL-ile House— Mal)ie. Todd & Co., Inc., New York an« Cliicago.

}8.

:

''The Byslander't

TRUE

'

Fra^inents frooi France

BRITISH.

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E ADY

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Vindlia

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Certain

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In

&

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P'^^

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9d.

&

1/-

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and

satisfaciory.

1/r

VINOLIA COMPANY LIMITED. LONDON AND PARIS. ,

sr

II

;

i;.

p'l

Itr,,

IviNI*!!.-..

n V

ai7

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