The Art of Female Sexual Seduction

The Art Of Female Sexual Seduction

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THE ART OF FEMALE SEXUAL SEDUCTION Written, Edited & Published By Library Tales All rights reserved, 2009-2010.

WWW.LIBRARYTALES.COM

Written by Library Tales Published by Library Tales Publishing, 2010 Copyright © 2009-2010 Library Tales Publishing, All rights reserved to their original owner; No part of this book, including interior design, cover design, and pictures, may be reproduced or transmitted in any form, by any means (electronic, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the publisher. All Rights are reserved to Library Tales Publishing, Both the writer and the publisher will not take any liability for any injury or damage, all graphics and photographs are reserved to Library Tales, Library Tales are not liable for any of the advice given in this book, please use this information by using your own logic and common sense.

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THE ART OF FEMALE SEXUAL EDUCTION Copyright © 2009-2010 by Library Tales Publishing LLC. All rights reserved. No part of this book shall be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without written permission from the publisher. No patent liability is assumed with respect to the use of the information contained herein. Although every precaution has been taken in the preparation of this book, the publisher and author assume no responsibility for errors or omissions. Neither is any liability assumed for damages resulting from the use of information contained herein. This Book’s design and name are registered trademarks of Library Tales. Books may be purchased for business or sales promotional use. For information please Email: Copyrights Division at [email protected]

Printed in the United States of America

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Important Notes The material in this book is for educational purposes and is intended to provide helpful guidance to lovers about human sexuality. Every attempt has been made to provide accurate, dependable, up-todate information. We believe what's presented here will be helpful and poses no risk to any healthy person. Neither the author nor the publisher is engaged in rendering medical, psychological, or any other professional service. If you have questions concerning the application of the material and advice described in this book and its affect on your health and Well-being, it is your responsibility to consult a qualified professional first. Any use of the techniques used in this book is at your own risk. The authors and publishers cannot be held responsible for any error, omission, professional disagreement, or outdated material in this book. The authors and publishers are not liable for any upsetting reaction, damage, injury, infection, fatal disease, or other adverse outcome as a result of applying the information or engaging in any activities suggested in this book. This book was created for adults, age 21 years or older only! Some subject material may not be suitable for minors; Continuing beyond this point indicates your acceptance of these restrictions, and your acknowledgement that alternative sexual practices are not offensive to you.

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“Real love is the love that sometimes arises after sensual pleasure: if it does, it is immortal; the other kind inevitably goes stale, for it lies in mere fantasy.” - Giacomo Casanova – Master of Sexual Seduction

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Content Introduction CHAPTER 1 - UNDERSTANDING WOMEN                                    

Understanding Women Women and men What a girl wants The Woman Of Your Dreams Wants & Needs Understanding women In Conclusion Part 2 - Understanding Men Common Errors Investing In Yourself Your Body Language Her Body Language Taking Care Of Yourself Part 3: Meeting Girls The basic steps Overcoming your fear of talking to women Approaching her What to say and how Getting A Phone Number Other venues When a girl wants to be approached Meeting Online Chat rooms From Date To Sex Where to go on your date Outdoor dates Indoor dates What to talk about Sex and critical topics How to read a women How long does it take to lay her? Getting women in the mood The make-out Her place or yours What to have at home Final words

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CHAPTER 2 - TIPS & TRICKS       

The M3 Model? Approach Rejection and Approach Anxiety Mission for Newbie’s Curing Rejection Enlightenment dawns final words

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Introduction Welcome, future Casanova. Thank you for investing the time to read my book, The Arts of Female Sexual Seduction. In the following weeks, I will be your guide to seducing beautiful women; this book was composed for you. After all it is important that you have a good time reading and using the materials in it. My mission is to help you change the way you treat, speak and communicate with women, both intellectually and sexually, whether you are a novice or if a serious player, you will find that this book can teach you a thing or two about sexual seduction. This book was designed as a step by step guide, do not think twice when encountering difficulty or in need of a refreshment course, to check back and consult this book. It was designed that way. So let’s begin …

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This book is only for people who are 21 or over! Note: before you start reading we wish to clarify the following: Women must be treated with respect, make sure you do not misuse this information to “Sleep Around” and attempt to turn yourself into a “Player” as you might call it, hurting people for the sake of sexual exploitation is wrong, and breaking a woman’s heart for the sake of your own sick pleasure will defiantly bring you some bad karma, don’t do to women what you don’t want them to do to you, “Players” eventually end up alone and miserable, despite the good times they had, so please – take this under consideration before reading. Thank You for Purchasing This Book Find this book and others at the Library Tales website: www.librarytales.com

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CHAPTER 1 UNDERSTANDING WOMEN

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Part 1 - Understanding Women Men, you know it: women are odd. Do you remember school? Boys playing with boys, girls playing with girls? Those were good times! No women except for mom and sisters (if any). Then adolescence came and ruined it all. Though women are extraordinarily motivating for us (and you do know why), sometimes it is so hard to communicate with them... Well, that's resolved. This book is one of the best pieces of advice for single men about women. It is about understanding women. Before I could start writing this book, I had to talk with a lot of different women, married and single women who were quite surprised (and also amused) of hearing a man was interested in finding out the "differences between men and women" and providing "his buddies" with the "secrets of how women think" as if they were "that complicated" (aren't they?). Some of these serious and sexy women even laughed at some of my questions and replies to their comments. However, after hearing a few dozen times that "every woman is different" and that none of them could talk on behalf of the rest (as if I had never heard it before); at the end the topic was so promising that they gladly accepted to stay and talk it over. The first thing I need to mention that men and women have different genitalia. Yes, I know that is not new for you, but did I mention the psychological consequences of our basic biological difference? No? OK, the fact our genitalia work outwards and theirs inwards has a very deep consequence on the way the fair sex thinks and sees the world. Read on. Women's brains works inwards>outwards. Meaning: They are going to concentrate on themselves before thinking about the rest of the world. This explains why those "eternal" terms of "five minutes" are usually enough to watch half of a soccer match. During those "five minutes", they are exploring their worlds, you see? They psychology commands them to behave like that. This doesn't happen when a woman becomes a mother. When women talk about their children, they usually move the woman to second place. Also take for granted they will turn into fierce merciless lionesses if they need to defend their children. Is this one of the instincts that has allowed us to survive as a species? Maybe, but this book is not an anthropological study, so let's go on. The point is that, for a woman, her children are more important than her and will always be Women once understood that they are physically weaker than men, and it has consequences even seven or eight millenniums afterwards. Women (though they will never admit it) see the world as "violent", contrary to men, who mainly find it "competitive". Now you understand why women, even teenagers, look for company to walk with them in the streets, or look forward to living with a man by their side when they grow up. This makes them feel safe: the most important requirement to develop and fulfill their femininity. This doesn't mean that women depend on men to feel comfortable, protected, or free (believing that would be a terrible mistake); but they do prefer to count on the protection of a man to feel more comfortable.

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When they find this security (observation: most women consider this thought a stereotype in the beginning but they actually accept it some minutes later), the next step in a woman's world is to take care of their immediate environment (including her man, if any). As women's brains works inwards>outwards, not only do they have to be beautiful, taking care of themselves... their immediate environment also needs to be beautiful. That is why women care so much about that "pretty little ornament" or that other "crazy little thing" would look great beside the "remember that beautiful flower pot we have got in the kitchen?" you bought the last time you two went out. This helps them to free their intimacy, another major part of their femininity. Should there be a last thing to mention about women and their worlds is that women need to communicate often to feel connected. This means talking, looking, touching, going, returning... but essentially talking. You may need to consider if you are a good listener these days. That can really help you. Just be careful not to make the same mistake every other man on earth makes. Ironic as it will sound, women talk just to be heard, not for you to solve whatever problem she is discussing. I repeat. Women do not want you to fix things; they want you to listen, be sympathetic and tell them about a time when you felt the exact same way. When men listen to a problem, they immediately think on doing something to solve it. Do not do that, just listen without offering advice or, if you feel you must do something, ask: "Is this one of those times when you want me to listen and not give you advice, or can I say something?" If you do it this way, she will see you really understand her and she is going to appreciate it (and you) a lot.

Women and men To understand women and their relationship with men, you need to understand something. Women's bodies are inwards>outwards, women's psychology is inwards>outwards, women's worlds are inwards>outwards but, sexually speaking, women have to let someone in. If you can understand the impact this irony has in them, then you are half way into understanding women. Of course, this does not mean women are the saints or the victims here. Women unconsciously think about this sexual reality with deep intimacy and act accordingly. That's it. They will not just let anyone in, they will be very picky about men and sex as they feel it is their intimacy at stake in the process. This is the base operation in the equation. Another component is that women have got a complete cocktail of hormones in their bodies due to something doctors call menstrual cycle. As a consequence of their (bloody) periods, they are complicated to the point they won't even understand themselves occasionally; even though, they are surer of what they want to feel fine.

What a girl wants First and foremost, security. Security means three things for a woman: physical security, emotional security (a. k. a. faithfulness) and temporal (and not temporary) security (a. k. a. stability). Among these, the most important feature they want in a man is stability. Even if it is quite known that women usually like more "Mr. Jerk" than "Mr. Nice" because he finds him manlier, at the end, single women usually marry a "Mr. Nice" because she finds him more stable. And because...

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They are more chivalrous, intimate, and tender. One of the best ways in which a single woman can ensure herself that the man who is giving her security now will not become her main aggressor later (Believe it or not, their brains are really this weird) is to see how men behave in their daily life. Even when women can easily live and survive without us (they can open the doors and also carry heavy things without our help), a chivalrous offering will decidedly work in the man's favor... Just don't exaggerate your chivalrousness because... If you exaggerate it you will be dropped. Women like to trust in the fact their men will be able to provide her some security from outer aggressions as well. That is to say, if he looks weak to her, he will probably look weak for other men and, therefore, it is more convenient for her to look somewhere else. Women will find attractive those men who behave manfully before the world but tenderly with them, even if he's not the most stunning man in the world. His manliness will show her how protective he can be; his tenderness, how supporting he can be if she needs him. A woman's brain is like that. Can you conquer a woman based in this? Yes, but not so fast, dude... She's still got something to show you... Before the final 'I do', women usually test men. They want to see if he is really manful, so, first and above all, she will try to DOMINATE him. Yes! As you just read it! It is on purpose! Here is where many men make the BIG MISTAKE of trying to please her all the time, giving her all what she asks for. Mistake? Yes. She's actually expecting that you will not allow her to dominate you. Learn how to handle that situation without being neither rude nor treating her unchivalrously, and as a last tip, do not think you are living all the time under this test. There is no need to be defensive either. Other tests women do? One of the women I interviewed confessed me she carried out three tests on her man before actually getting married with him: She made him drink until he could drink no more, to see if he got aggressive with her when he was intoxicated. She also spent a whole afternoon teasing, pestering, annoying, bothering, and humiliating him as she wanted to find out if he was capable of hitting or insulting her when he was really angry or whether he was resentful. The third one was going to a dangerous neighborhood, to see if he was afraid of being held-up or assaulted, or to see if he would abandon her in a dangerous situation. Why? Because when a woman ultimately becomes a mother (something almost women want to become sooner or later), she knows she will be in a very vulnerable situation. Some women will be always ready to sacrifice her job, career, friends and other things just to be able to look after her children; she wants to make sure her man will not leave her on her own when she most needs to be supported. Instinct? Maybe, but it is the way they are... Help her feel safe in all these ways and she will be yours as long as you want.

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The Woman of Your Dreams It's true that women can sometimes be impossible to understand in relationships. However, it only takes some patience, time and a little determination to decipher even the most confusing female behavior. We all dream of the perfect woman, some people love blonds, smarts, humor and a small dose of spontaneity, others love brunets, intelligent, well spoken, articulate and more “business oriented”. If you want to attract the woman of your dreams, you need to become the man who might attract that women, what do I mean? If you decided you want to attract a wealthy women, intelligent, well spoken, and royal-like – you might not choose to look for her in a sleazy bar in the east village (I refer to New York in this book since I am from the big city, but this is relevant to all states and natiions); in this case, you might want to hang around at golf clubs, social events, charity events, etc. If you decided that you wish to attract a model, career oriented, spontaneous and a bit wild, you may want to look for her in a more suitable location, you need to behave differently, think and act like she would. These 5 easy steps will help you get started: Step 1: Do some research. Spend some time with your female friends, sisters, aunts, grandmothers, female cousins and pick their brains. Don't be afraid to ask some pressing questions. You'll be surprised at how much you can learn about female behavior, habits, interests and desires just by spending time with your female friends and relatives. An observant male will learn everything he's ever wanted to know about the female species. This exercise will also help to eliminate some of the confusion that men feel when faced with the sometimes unpredictable nature of women. As you go through all the following steps, you will soon begin to realize that women only appear confusing and unpredictable because they are actually insecure. Step 2: Get out of your comfort zone. As a red-blooded male, you are most likely as emotionally reserved as they come. You would never let someone see you cry, right? Well, if you want to understand women in relationships, get ready to wear your heart on your sleeve. Most women are very emotional and they expect their men to be more in touch with their emotions as well. Thus, you have to learn to open up and not keep all your feelings bottled up inside as usual. Express yourself emotionally by letting down your guard and confiding in her about any life-changing events or experiences, such as the death of a loved one. As you continue to share your innermost emotions with her, you will notice the bond between you growing immensely. More importantly, you will realize that, for women, sharing emotions and stories are an extremely important part of a relationship. Step 3: Listen to what she has to say. This requires staying silent on your part. You have probably conditioned yourself to look as though you're listening when, in fact, your mind is somewhere else completely. It's time to stop such disrespectful behavior and get used to giving the woman in your life your undivided attention. A key to understanding women in relationships is realizing that they love to talk about and share their deepest feelings, fears and desires with their significant others. All you have to do is listen. Most of the time you don't even have to give any advice because all she wants is to know that you care. Just listening intently is enough, and will be warmly appreciated.

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Step 4: Talk to her. Next time the two of you have a disagreement or argument; do not give her the silent treatment. No matter how difficult it may be for you, you must let go of your pride and approach her for a genuine conversation. Ignoring her will only make you appear infantile and immature. Moreover, when she asks you if something's wrong, don't give a shrug and say "nothing." The most important factor in any relationship is communication. So, make an effort to become an honest and sensitive communicator. Women prioritize relationships, and they must feel confident that the relationship is a priority in your life as well. If you refuse to open up, you will only make the woman in your life feel more insecure and uncertain about the relationship, and this will only make her behavior seem that much more confusing. Step 5: Walk a mile in her shoes. It's not easy being a woman in a man's world. Women don't have the same opportunities and privileges as a man. You will gain a much broader understanding of women in relationships if you simply take the time and effort to acknowledge the struggles and disappointments that women face. Basically, try to look at the world from a female viewpoint, but be aware that the view may be quite overwhelming. As you become familiar with some of the hardships that women face (such as being a single mom, earning less than a man, being stereotyped and underappreciated), you will gain a much deeper understanding of a woman's mind and heart. Bottom line? Keep an open mind, be sensitive to a woman's experiences, make her feel loved and special, confide in her to let her know you trust her and listen to her. You will never be confused again In Conclusions • Every woman is different, so there are not exact rules to understand them. • Women prefer a sort of "tender jerk" for man: someone romantic, chivalrous, sweet, affectionate, comforting... but at the same time, someone who shows himself masculine, strong, powerful and aggressive, especially before the rest of the world. • Some women will test you, some will not, so get ready for tests and not to give in your position of man before any woman. • Show yourself manly and they will like you easier. • As society evolves, women become more independent, but intimately they have not changed much. Just try to avoid stereotypes and get to know the woman you really have in front of you.

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Wants & Needs I am now going to reveal to you what women want, have always wanted and will always be looking for in any man with whom they become intimate. It is a "Trump" attribute, which means that its presence is a more powerful influence than others and can tip the scales of emotional acceptance in your favor immediately. Be advised that I will be dealing with a monumental but accurate generalization which is not meant to apply to every female who ever lived. I bow to the variability within and between the sexes. Nonetheless, you will see that my assertion has the undeniable thud of the obvious. If you feel the cold chill of disbelief or the fever of indignation rising in you at these words, please consult with Woody Allen, a cunning expert at attracting beautiful talented women on the sheer force of this "Trump" attribute which draws women like... migrating butterflies. What women want from men is confidence. The Trump is Personal Confidence. Confidence... not arrogance, not dominance, not one-upsmanship, not useless bravado, not macho heroics. Women just love truly confident men. Now as you know, confidence is an attitude thing. In particular, male confidence frequently manifests as an "I-can-handle-it attitude". This does not mean that feelings are denied. It doesn’t imply an absence of doubt, fear, or vulnerability. A delusion of total self sufficiency is not required. Confidence simply says: "Sure I can". The attitude of confidence doesn’t even have to be constant, just generally present in the face of most life challenges. For hundreds of thousands of years of human development, a confident attitude was much easier for men to gain and display than it is now because it was required for survival. There was hardly any choice. Until recently, the demands of physical survival were the primary issue in pair-bonding and confidencebuilding roles for both sexes directly related to survival was far more apparent. I am not talking about survival in extraordinary circumstances, either. It could be as basic as steadfastness in getting the crops in out of the rain. In the smaller communities in which we used to live, everyone could see the skilled hunter, the dedicated farmer and stockman, the courageous protector, the skilled artisan, the accomplished leader, the sage teacher, the men who didn’t give up in the face of threatening set-backs. Why hell! There have been times and cultures where a women wouldn’t even consider a man who couldn’t claim to be a good carpenter or a competent dirt mover. These roles, decreed by harsher realities of life than most of us now experience, were obvious advertisements for male virtue, i.e., "I can handle it". Unfortunately, the signs indicative of genuine masculine confidence are confusing today and gender roles are a chaotic mess. The external demonstrations of natural confidence have become confused with the poor substitute of consumer status symbols. But... women instinctually look for clues to a man’s level of confidence... and test it to the limit... but not in the old-fashioned way.

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Now for the good news! Since confidence is primarily an attitude toward meeting life challenges of all kinds - and there’s no shortage of challenges in the world - the essential attitude can still be cultivated and demonstrated. But it cannot be faked with money, looks, or possessions. Willingness to face important struggles is still the ultimate key to a woman’s respect. In contemporary times, a man may express this dynamic in many conventional ways. He can show his confidence integrity through competence in his work, education, sports, hobbies, child rearing, or doing home improvements. Actually, we can include here anything which involves mastering a new learning curve and overcoming ego uncertainties. Now, if a man really wants to do some crash confidence building these days, he can try still the oldfashioned approach - and many do so. He can expose himself to more risks and bigger risks: jump out of a few airplanes, compete at martial arts, ski board off of snowy mountains, lift weights, climb sheer cliffs with only the strength of his fingertips for security, take on dangerous political controversies, start an unusual new business with more enthusiasm than capital, confront and influence provocative teenagers, or spend days in the wilderness with only his tom-tom for company. But we all know perfectly well that these are methods not character outcomes. It is not the specific activity that matters, what matters is what goes on in the man’s head that makes him feel some sense of Mastery. Or... a man can cut to the bottom line, avoid physically and financially dangerous experiences, and go for The Really Big Risk... the ultimate emotional challenge. He can work directly at becoming more confident with women themselves. That’s riskier than cliff climbing, anyway! Although a woman likes to believe a man is willing to deal with a lot of things, what really counts is that he is able to deal with her. A healthy, mature woman resists impassioned commitment to a man who is afraid of her sexuality, her intelligence, or her emotions. This means gaining confidence and empathy (unavoidably stuck together) in approaching and relating to women on many levels, in the face of rejections real or imagined. And since this is the riskiest venture of all, the pay-off is, appropriately, the biggest: the devotion of a loving woman who can make your life extremely pleasant on a daily basis. Confidence with women in general - beautiful, plain, smart, nice, mean, old, young - every kind of woman - is an unavoidable social skill which can and must be learned if what you want is the greatest intimate relationship of your life Just as men have many traits in common (we like nice tits, asses, cute faces and big cars — or at least, most of us do), it’s the same with women. Even if they seem so different at times, they have many similarities in the way they think and especially in what they’re looking for in a man. I would like to give you an exercise. I know, I know … You hate those, but I promise you’ll enjoy this one. Call up one of your friend girls, a girl you’re not dating and would consider to be a friend. You might have wanted to lay her before, or vice versa, but it doesn’t matter now. Following is a list. Read it to her as if you’re describing her character. I guarantee that she’ll be surprised. If you did this to a random girl you didn’t even know, she would be like, “Wow, how do you know all this about me? Are you psychic or something?”

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THE LIST: 1. Sometimes you’re very emotional. At times like these, you don’t follow your common sense; it’s your feelings that guide you. Like when you’re with a guy, you don’t think with your mind; you don’t think rationally. Instead, you listen to your emotions and what your heart says about him. 2. On the other hand, you have a wild side as well. Sometimes you’re into adventures, challenges, doing wild things. You can even surprise yourself by doing something you never would have thought of. 3. In your relationships, you usually stay passive and expect the man to lead. You want a real man who can do it. On a first date or in a longer relationship, you don’t like to decide where to go. You like it when the man chooses the theater, the film and arranges everything — even when he tells you where to sit. 4. You like surprises. Most of your relationships become boring as time goes by. You get used to the same routines, places and boring sex. You want variety and changes. You want your man to surprise you sometimes and keep you on your toes, to feel the excitement of something new and unknown happening. You want a man who is creative enough to surprise you. 5. Little details are important to you. You always take a look at a man’s hands or shoes to see if they’re clean. Sometimes romantic moments, like holding your boyfriend’s hand, hugging and kissing, or just receiving a little, thoughtful something, are much more important than big, expensive gifts. Getting a postcard or a phone call and knowing that your boyfriend, or someone you care for, is thinking about you can make you really happy. Such small details can mean more to you than a big bank account or an expensive car. 6. You are oftentimes mildly critical of yourself. You stand in front of the mirror, looking here and there and noticing if something isn’t right. You’re looking for minor flaws or imperfections on your body. You hate to admit it, but sometimes you might even enjoy this. At times like this, you need a little validation. A compliment about your looks or an inquiring glance from a man can increase your self-esteem. 7. You also have very difficult, self-critical periods. When this happens, it’s not easy to tolerate you, and sometimes you wish that everybody would go away and leave you alone. You might be rude to people and guys even when you don’t intend to be. (Note: Women have periods. While periods don’t directly control men, women’s menstruation cycles play an important role in their lives. They sometimes get out of bed on the wrong side and are influenced too much by their emotions. A woman is more likely to brush you off on a bad day or when she’s having her period.)

8. Deep inside, you still believe in love at first sight. But it never really happened to you. You have a picture of the ideal man in your head, your Prince Charming, who will sweep you off your feet, put you on his white horse and rescue you from the castle. In each of your new relationships, you fantasize about it being perfect, but it never is. Your boyfriends might measure up to 60–70 percent of your ideal guy, but something is always missing. 9. When dating a new guy, it usually takes four to five dates before you say you’re going out with him. You want the man to initiate the first kiss, and you usually test a man. You set up hoops and expect him to jump through them. Sometimes you test men too much.

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10. About sex: You like it when it “just happens.” You don’t like to plan anything in advance whether it’s the first time or the 100th. You like to be swept away by the moment. In bed, you stay passive, but take control when your wild side comes out. You like to experiment and try out new things. So, what was the response? Was she stunned? How did you know all that about her? Don’t tell her you read about it in a book, OK? Remember what the list says? Excitement and surprises. Keep her on her toes. She’ll be speculating about where you got this info. Joke with her. Tell her you have a sixth sense or whatever. Just don’t tell the truth. If you want to strengthen the effect, you can even memorize the list. It’s not that hard. You might try acting like a prophet and “read” the list items in her cards, her palm or something else. The list is a general description of an average girl who is in her early 20s and likes going out to clubs. Although it’s an amusing tool, it will help you get to know women better. Read that list many times, and notice the keywords: a real man, staying passive, expecting him to lead, emotions, excitement, variety, little details, being critical about herself and others, periods, love at first sight, Prince Charming. I’m going to talk about these in detail. For men, keywords would be something like: hot girls, good sex, cute faces, big tits and sexy butts, Rational thinking, racing and competition, challenge, sports and cars. Compare the two, and you’ll begin to realize why it seems so hard to understand women at times. Ready for more fun? Read on.

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Understanding women To most men, women seem like irrational creatures that make no sense at all. It’s naturally true if you view it from our perspective. But, if you try to think with a woman’s head for a while, it will be like turning on the lights in a dark room. To achieve this, you’ll need to consider three factors: the impact that society has on women, how their brains are wired and how evolution affects their instincts. A hundred years ago, women who had sex or children before or outside marriage were labeled whores. Some girls still grow up with “no sex before marriage” drilled into their heads by their parents. A guy who lays a new woman every day is considered a “player.” But even today, after the sexual revolution, a girl who does the same thing is called a “slut.” From early childhood, girls are told by their mothers and fathers to be careful about dating and men. I once read a story about a 15-year-old girl. She gave a blow job to a classmate, with whom she was in love. After the breakup, the guy went around telling the whole school about the blow job, and everyone ridiculed the girl. In the end, she had to change schools. Social restrictions remain with women throughout their lives due to the influence of friends, colleagues and GUYS. Yes, you read it right: guys. We are also influenced by the world and social expectations — we’re used to women withholding sex. We EXPECT them to do so. If a girl gives herself to you on the first date, you won’t be able to escape the thought that she has done this many times already. After all, if she’s not afraid of being despised for such an act, she must be a “slut,” right? Even when she’s on her own, social influences are wired so deeply into a girl’s brain that she might not be able to have sex with a guy she wants, but hardly knows. A girl I know was brought up in a strict Christian manner. At the age of 19, she tried to have sex with a guy she loved. She ended up crying and being unable to continue — just before the act. She had to marry someone she didn’t love, and then divorce him in two years to get rid of the whole “no sex before marriage” dogma planted deep in her brain by her mother over the years. It took her Another year and an understanding partner to be able to enjoy sex. There is a term you need to know: “chick logic.” It’s supposed to mean that women might act strange from a man’s rational viewpoint and seem totally illogical. That’s the definition; to understand it, we have to consider the reasons described above. Chick logic is about looking for approval from you and her friends. In other words, she needs to rationalize having sex. Here’s an example of chick logic in action: A woman will often go out to a club with her friends to “have fun.” She doesn’t expect to find “the One,” but she enjoys the attention and validation she gets from guys trying to pick her up. She will quickly get drunk on all the free drinks she receives. And guess why her girlfriends are there? To protect her from leaving with a guy. However, they’re not really protecting her from the guys, but rather from herself. If she has sex with a guy, she’ll be labeled a “slut” by either her girlfriends or herself. Still, she secretly wants to have sex! And This is even more tricky: If she leaves with a guy and he fucks her, she can say that she “lost control,” or it was “all because of the alcohol” or “because her girlfriends didn’t protect her well enough.” This way she can have sex without having to deal with her own guilt and her girlfriends’ judgment.

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And do you know why she needs the alcohol? She needs it to bypass her LOGICAL BRAIN. There’s great tension inside her when she’s about to have a one-night stand. Her body is getting aroused and telling her to have sex, but her chick logic kicks in and says: “What are you doing? You don’t even know this guy! Your friends will think you’re a slut! He might even be a stalker! And what if you want something more lasting? This guy is so Cute. You don’t want to seem like a slut to him!” Of course, when it happens, she won’t be thinking so clearly. But she will feel a DEEP URGE in her guts to stop. This results in her saying, “No, we’re not having sex!” while rubbing her pussy against your cock and moaning. If you can arouse her enough, her sexual instincts will bypass her logical brain, and the gates will open wide. There is also a common misconception that women don’t enjoy sex. They do. Put this into your head in capital letters: WOMEN ENJOY SEX JUST AS MUCH AS MEN DO. Have you ever heard a woman screaming during an orgasm? Believe me; they enjoy it a hundred times more than we do. It’s just that to get rid of her chick logic and other factors I’m going to mention, she needs time. Don’t you watch Sex and the City? You should, because you can learn a lot from that series. Or just buy a Cosmopolitan magazine, and read all the tips on Making women’s sex lives better and their orgasms stronger. Apart from chick logic, there’s another big difference imposed on men and women by society: the way we are brought up. From their early years, girls long to be Cinderella saved by Prince Charming. They dream of romance every day. Disney films have added to the fantasy. Guys, on the other hand, play with Matchbox cars and dream of becoming football stars or astronauts. We are fascinated by sports, competition and challenge. What do boys talk about? Whose Matchbox is bigger and better, who’s better at sports, whose favorite football star is cooler, etc. Later, this becomes whose car is faster and bigger, whose girl is hotter and who earns more. Such kinds of competition attract women less. They play with Barbie dolls and dress like little princesses or brides. They talk about whose Barbie is cuter and role-play with their dolls. During their teens, they fantasize about their favorite pop stars or dream of falling in love. Later, this turns into competition in the form of looks, bickering about their relationships and each other, and chatting about the latest trends in fashion. Instead of challenges, they are moved by relationships, fashion, romance and drama. At least, most of them are. While you would rather watch sports or read a magazine about cars, your girl watches soaps and reads romance novels instead. You will never be able to truly escape this conditioning. Most women will always want to hold your hand and watch the moon rise with the stars even if you’d rather be having sex or watching your favorite sports. So take this into account, and don’t blame them for it. Compare the way women are built to our body structure. They are generally shorter, thinner and weaker, in other words, more fragile. Their most important genitals are inside their bodies: the vagina, the womb, etc. We could say that while men are donors (givers), women are acceptors (receivers). During intercourse, they need to open up, not just physically, but emotionally as well.

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Just as nature has its cycles in the form of changing seasons, girls have theirs with their monthly periods. Because of this and all of the above, they tend to focus more on the inside and listen to their emotions. Women live somewhat in harmony with their emotions — much more so than we do. Girls will often make decisions based on their feelings and not on rational thinking. That’s why they seem so illogical at times. Social expectations also appear in the form of looks. Women are required to look like supermodels — that’s what is planted into their minds by the media. Because of being more sensitive emotionally, they need constant validation from parents, friends and boyfriends. If she looks into a mirror, she will instantly think, “Hasn’t my butt gotten bigger? Don’t I look fat in these pants? Is my cleavage tight enough?” It’s no wonder women have more plastic surgery than men. It’s easy for a girl to get carried away on the ocean of her emotions. You forget to bring her a flower on your anniversary, and she bursts into tears, thinking, “He doesn’t love me anymore. Is it another woman? Have I gotten fat? Do I look bad?” and so forth. It’s like jumping on a roller coaster — and we don’t know where it’s going to stop. Women can easily make a big deal out of the smallest things and tend to attribute other problems they may have to their looks. You raise your voice, and she cries all day, thinking you don’t love her. Furthermore, girls can be very indecisive at times. Which clothes to wear, where to go, which film to see, whether to leave her previous boyfriend or not — she can get lost among the emotional waves quickly. As a result, she expects the Man (who is stronger and more resolute and confident) to free her from this responsibility, to make the decisions himself and to lead her. You will read much more about this in the next chapter. Let’s talk more about sex. Sex for women is a much bigger decision than it is for men. They are giving themselves to you, not just physically, but emotionally as well. To enjoy sex, a girl needs to open up emotionally and has to be there mentally as well. Certain thoughts will always surface in a woman’s mind, and in order to be able to relax and enjoy sex, she has to bypass them. This is social conditioning: the possibility of pregnancy, you’re not loving her, your leaving her after intercourse or your possibly being a stalker. Most girls need to feel totally safe and comfortable in your company before they can free themselves from such worries. But, once they do, they can experience bigger orgasms than most men. Although this may make your life a bit harder, realize that it also means you can overcome social restrictions more quickly. If a woman feels you truly “match” and she is comfortable in your company, she will never withhold sex. Although each and every woman is different, they have many traits in common, and their needs change as they grow older. Young girls are less experienced, and they are usually looking for an older man. In their early 20s, many women are moved by overwhelming emotions, excitement, adventure and the feeling of danger. It’s no wonder Indiana Jones type adventurers or bad boys, skaters and those living dangerous lifestyles attract more chicks. Just as young people of both sexes do, they are seeking their identity and happiness. Part of this involves getting short-term satisfaction from alcohol, drugs, cigarettes and the adrenaline that a dangerous guy can inject into their lives. As they grow older, their biological clocks start ticking, and they realize that if they want children, they have until their mid-30s. Thus, they start looking for a man who can provide for them and with whom

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they can create a family. Some girls get married in their mid- or late 20s, then quickly get bored with marriage and the lack of exciting sex. Women develop their sexuality over time, and their sex drive increases. Many of them are willing to cheat on their husbands if a powerful guy appears. These are rough generalizations. Different kinds of girls respond to different kinds of male characteristics and personality types. You don’t have to become a bad boy or live a dangerous lifestyle to attract women. First, there are common Manly traits to which most girls respond. Second, you will decide the types of women that suit your personality the best and act in ways to attract them. If you’re an artist, you won’t have success with artistic girls by changing your personality and becoming a bad boy. But, by developing Manly traits in yourself and getting experience, you will be able to attract the kinds of women you want. I am going to talk more about this later in the book. I’m sure you’ve watched the Discovery Channel once or twice. In the animal kingdom, there is an interesting concept. In a herd of elephants, for example, there are many females, but only one male, who sexes all of them. This is the alpha male. If another male wants to have sex with the alpha male’s females, he has to challenge him, which results in a fight. Either the challenging male wins and takes the harem, or the alpha male remains in his position. Females are designed to give birth to one or a few offspring at a time. A male can spread his semen among the females in his herd and have many progeny. This process guarantees that the offspring inherit the most powerful genes and that there is a strong alpha male to protect them. How does this look when projected to us? During the Stone Age, women wanted a man who was powerful enough to hunt down prey and protect the immediate family and the clan from danger. Since then, values have changed. Women are looking for somebody to bring home money, take care of the kids and provide for the whole family. Safety comes in the form of cash. Still, many girls are turned on by strong men. Why is this? It’s because of basic instincts wired into us by evolution. Even though society changes, our instincts stay with us. Basic social values, like attraction to money, come in the form of thoughts. A girl thinks, “I’m getting older; I need a man to settle down with.” She is even willing to make a compromise and marry a less attractive male just to fulfill societal expectations. On the other hand, instincts come in the form of emotions. When she is with a strong male and he puts his powerful arms around her, she feels a sudden safety. She is not going to try to explain it to herself; it’s just “good to be with him.” Can you imagine a girl who’s about to get married going out with her girlfriends and ending up in bed with a stranger, who fucks her without a condom? I don’t want to disillusion you, but this has happened many times. I’ve seen players pull it off. And what’s more, you can’t even blame the poor girl for it. It’s in her guts. She is about to get married to a guy who will provide for her. Then a powerful Man comes and triggers such deep emotions in her that she can’t hold herself back. Her instincts take over her body. She loses control. It’s something she hasn’t experienced in quite a while or maybe ever. What can we learn from this? A girl meets two kinds of guys in her life: the providers and the real Men. She will marry a provider and have sex with the real Man. The real Man creates such powerful emotions in her with his presence that she is ready to overcome social restrictions with him. And that’s what she is secretly longing for: her Prince Charming appearing in the form of a Man. She waits for that moment to come for her entire life.

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Regarding this, I have to tell you that WOMEN TEST MEN occasionally. They will consciously create certain situations to see how you react. A woman will always test how far she can go with you and push to the limit. These tests are used to sort out the males who are not powerful enough and to find a real Man. If you fall for it, you lose your chance. But, if you act like a real Man, she will be instantly attracted to you and won’t care so much about your looks — as long as you are neat and well groomed. There are many tests that women use mostly to see if you act consistently within your frame of a Man. For instance, you approach a girl in a club, and she turns her back to you. If you gently but confidently turn her toward you, she will see that you’re not another average Joe and talk to you. Some women test a lot; some don’t test at all. It mostly depends on her personality, her experience and the number of men she has dealt with. The key to passing these tests is to do what you want, and don’t say what you think she wants to hear. Show her that you have your own opinions, you have your own desires, and you are not afraid to act on them. With experience, you will learn to recognize these tests and pass them by reacting consistently.

In Conclusion Women speak a different language. Their language is emotions and not just words. When talking to a woman, use this knowledge to have a bigger effect. If you don’t understand her at times, attribute it to her swirling emotions, or just ask her, “How do you feel?” A woman’s keyword is Feelings. Women come with powerful instincts packed inside. To help them overcome social restrictions, try to bring out their instincts by acting like a real Man.

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Part 2 - Understanding Men I know, you probably think – why do I need to understand men? I am a man? That may be true, but that does not mean you understand men from a woman’s standpoint Perhaps if women were to start thinking like men, it would make this whole man and woman relationship a whole lot easier. Women have a tendency to lament about problems because they want their problems to be acknowledged, while men complain about problems because they are asking for solutions. These are just a few concepts from the book 'Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus.' Obviously there are differences between women and men's viewpoints and how they react under stress. From an early age men are taught to be disconnected from their internal feelings. Women are also socialized to expect men to be strong and in control. According to the Australian Institute of Family Studies survey of 650 divorced men and women ' Towards Understanding the Reasons for Divorce, ' 20 per cent said infidelity was the main cause for their marriage breakdowns but it came third on the list of reasons given for divorce, after communication problems and incompatibility. At the same time, men very rarely find the comfort they are seeking through affairs. Those who try counseling say that extramarital sex only compounds their feelings of guilt, isolation and despair, which often lead to depression. Those starved of intimacy at home occasionally develop sex addictions, in the same way that bulimics binge harder, with zero relief. The cheater, like the bulimic, is desperately trying to fill an emotional void. Women are fortunate in that they are able to find satisfying emotional connections through networks of friends as well as a deep, physical and emotional intimacy through their children, predominantly newborns and toddlers. But in our man-as-pillar society, sex is the only way men can achieve emotional closeness. Having more sex can become a desperate search to fill that gap. In a fidelity poll of over 770 women conducted by WomanSavers.com, over 60% of women believed that emotional affairs lead to physical affairs. In a similar Woman Saver’s infidelity poll of over 1,000 women, 56% felt that online affairs constituted infidelity. Therefore, even if a man doesn't take off his pants, most women seemed to feel that emotional cheating is just as bad as physical cheating. I talked a lot about “being a Man” in the previous chapter. But what do I mean by this? This is the most difficult part to understand. Once you really get it down, you will have no problems with women. If you ask them, 999 out of 1,000 women will say that they are waiting for “the Man.” Still, the concept itself is very vague. A girl will “feel” when she is with a “Man,” but that doesn’t help you too much, does it? In order to understand it from our viewpoint, we will look at genetics again. Women are acceptors, while men are donors. An acceptor can choose whether to accept what the donor gives or not. Hot girls are spoiled by the numerous unconditional offers they get and usually reject them flatly.

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They love to remind us that it’s they who choose. But this is not ALWAYS the case. A hot woman will meet many average Joes every day. Of course, she could select any of them if she wanted. But what she craves is a real Man. And here’s the twist: That Man is not a real Man for her alone, but for all other women as well. He has qualities to which all girls will respond. It’s wired inside them. He is now the one in the position of power. So, in the end, she will have to do the dirty work and seduce him. Women don’t spend hours in front of the mirror just to be sure that they look their best, but also to ensure that when a real Man comes, he notices them. And this is how an ideal seduction looks. The man CHOOSES first. He expresses his interest in the woman through his attentions. If he is POWERFUL enough, the woman will like him. But she will also know that he has CHOICES, so she will try to seduce the Man and tame him to stay with her. So what do I mean by “powerful”? Looks, money, fame or influence? None of the above. These are just external qualities that can trick a woman into feeling that you are powerful. True power comes from the inside. A real Man will make her feel like a woman just by his presence. Even if he is naked and without his money, car and clothes, his power radiates from within. Back to evolution, the most important thing to show your woman is that she can feel safe with you. The Man has to be POWERFUL enough to LEAD her. But, if you are in a restaurant and she is the one who has to choose the table where you sit, then has to order the food while listening to you say, “You are soooo beautiful. I don’t deserve such a beauty,” what will she think? Is this man capable of protecting her? Does she feel safe with him? No. So the No. 1 quality a Man has is the ability to lead. Here are the other two as well: 1. A Man knows how to lead, and he is confident in his role. 2. A Man always has options, self-respect and is never needy. 3. A Man knows how to treat her. Let’s look at No. 1 again: A Man knows how to lead, and he is confident in his role. You know how hard it is to be the captain of a ship? You are constantly forced to make decisions and take responsibilities. A slight sign of uncertainty is enough for you to lose the faith of your whole crew and probably the ship as well. How could 40 people follow their captain if he showed signs of hesitation and uncertainty? If you were in the crew, would you risk your life for such a captain? Not likely. Would you do it for a confident and resolute one who is always certain, even if he makes mistakes at times? Yes. It’s almost the same with women. There are two people in a boat: you and she. You are the captain. She expects you to lead. At the first sign of uncertainty, she will jump out of your boat and choose another one. You will constantly have to be on your toes when making decisions. No one cares if it’s a good or bad decision; it’s you who will take the responsibility in the end. Young guys can’t take responsibilities. To be a Man, you have to learn that first. Each and every decision you make will have a consequence. You can postpone making it, but sooner or later, you will have to decide. And it might be too late by then. I haven’t talked enough about confidence yet. Hesitation is not a Manly trait. A Man knows what he WANTS and ISN’T AFRAID to TAKE IT. When you make decisions, BE SURE OF YOURSELF. It’s a part of LEADING and taking RESPONSIBILITIES. You choose the restaurant where you will go with your date. You choose the table where you will sit. The food might be bad, and the people at the nearby table might be

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annoying, but who cares? If you are confident, my friend, you can get away with almost ANYTHING. Yes, ANYTHING. Read that sentence again. Psychologists did an interesting experiment: There was a photocopy machine in a school where many students were always in line during breaks waiting their turn to make copies. A guy walked up to the machine with a banana in his hand. He cut to the front of the line and said, “I need to copy these papers right now, so I can eat my banana before the end of the break.” He did it casually and confidently, as if it were a normal everyday thing to cut to the front of the queue. But what happened next? Nothing. He stood in the front of the line, did what he wanted and then went to eat his banana. And no one complained! There was no fight, no loud words. This incident is just one of the many that show you can get away with ANY BULLSHIT as long as you are consistent with it and act confident enough in your role. There is a difference between real and false confidence, however. A confident person is calm and cool, like a sniper waiting for his turn in the bushes. When such a person walks into a room, everyone is looking at him. And not because he walks so stiffly that they are laughing at him! That would be a falsely confident person, someone who is either annoying or funny because of visibly overcompensating for his insecurities. Typical signs are: trying to get attention by being loud, harassing somebody either verbally or physically to prove something to onlookers or being stiffly formal and walking like a robot with a serious expression instead of a smile. But, if you don’t have real confidence yet, how can you fake it and not appear to be faking it? Isn’t this a paradox? Not really. With experience, you will be able to LOOSEN UP in your ROLE and seem very casual from the outside. A beginning stand-up comic is very nervous when he takes the stage for the first time. He has butterflies in his stomach. An experienced comic will take the stage as if nothing unusual is happening. No one notices that what he has is a kind of fake confidence. He still has butterflies in his stomach, but he has learned to deal with it and hide those feelings. And that, my friend, comes with EXPERIENCE. If you have never kissed a woman, don’t expect to be confidently kissing 10 women a day tomorrow. This book is not a magic bullet. You will have to practice. You will have to experiment. You will have to put in the time yourself. I can’t do that for you. But, when you do, you’ll get the EXPERIENCE. So back to our list, the second point is: A Man always has options, self-respect and is never needy. Yes. What do I mean by having OPTIONS? Initially, the woman is in the position of power. She is the one who chooses. And she knows this very well. When you approach her, she can reject you. When it’s time to kiss her, she can say no. When you want to have sex, she can refuse it. That’s all true. But how do we make sure that she doesn’t have a choice? Ha! By being a Man. She will see that you are one of the few “select” instantly and know this is her one and only chance to meet somebody like you. She knows you can move on and get another woman whenever you want. By the way, I tricked you. A Man who is capable of leading well won’t leave her any time to think. He will appear out of the blue and talk to her. He will kiss her when the right moment comes without asking anything. She won’t have a choice. At least she will feel as if she doesn’t have a choice. And that’s what she has wanted all along. To be swept away by the moment, with no other choice or time to think about social restrictions.

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Let’s talk a bit about SELF-RESPECT. People who think they are worth nothing or want to be treated like shit WILL BE treated like shit. How do you expect anyone to respect you if you don’t even respect yourself? Be able to stand up for yourself whether you’re dealing with women or men. How you see yourself and what you think of yourself influence your behavior, and people will respond to you accordingly. Being depressed and having negative thoughts will get you nowhere. Your thoughts form your personality. Those who have negative thoughts and see everything as gray will attract such things into their lives. People who learn to control their thoughts and strengthen themselves with positive affirmations become successful. “I don’t deserve this. I’m such a loser. I’m worth nothing. My life is a waste. Nothing works for me. I’ll never get any girls.” Eliminate those destructive thoughts for good. “I’m a real Man. I know what I want, and I know how to get it. I have goals in my life, and I am motivated to reach them. I’m successful with women and successful in everything else. I enjoy my smallest achievements and stay proudly on my path whatever life brings. I’m open to new experiences and ideas, learning from my faults and able to change myself in a good direction.” That’s what you should say to yourself every day. As I mentioned, another tool in your arsenal is not being NEEDY. You don’t need her. But why don’t you need her when she’s so beautiful? And you’ve never had such a beautiful creature even talk to you … Stop now before your legs start shaking, will you? Have your SELF-RESPECT, and don’t cling to her like a baby. Never put her above you. There are so many guys putting her up there that it’s not a challenge to her anymore. We will talk more about this in the next chapter. In ancient times, the most successful cavemen, the Men, always had OPTIONS. They could choose literally any of the women they wanted. Did they put those women on a pedestal? No. They treated them like normal people — people who had desirable physical characteristics and might be capable of giving birth to their powerful children. Think a bit. If you were Brad Pitt and you could have all the women you wanted, would you put any of them above you? No way! And don’t laugh: When a real Man comes into her life, it will be like Brad Pitt appearing. Be careful though. Girls know what’s up. Somebody with options will never show off or brag about it. He won’t say, “Oh, I have three girls, Vanessa, Mary and Janice. It’s so hard to choose between them. It’s not easy being a player these days.” He will act like a Man instead, somebody who is willing to go his own way without trying to meet anyone’s expectations. You don’t need to have eight girlfriends to have the attitude I’m talking about. Even if you had to move to another planet without knowing anyone, your Manliness should radiate from your personality, confidence and behavior. A hot girl always has many men on the go. There are at least 10 numbers she can call to have an army of guys flocking to her door immediately, just like hot guys who keep many girlfriends at the same time. Usually the girls even know about each other, but the guy is so cool that they don’t care. Of course, you don’t have to keep a harem if it’s not to your taste. Initially, one girl will be more than enough to handle. But you should still keep a few phone numbers in your pocket. Don’t stop seeing other women because of dating a hot girl.

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Even if you’ve kissed her or had sex with her, that doesn’t mean you’re already in a relationship and she is deeply in love with you. If you feel like it, call up some of those numbers, go out and have some fun. See? It’s again about having OPTIONS. The third thing on our list is: A Man knows how to treat her. A Man is a gentleman. He will be attentive, opening doors and pulling out chairs for her, and know how to care for her. Of course, he does all this in a confident way. Girls mostly encounter two types of guys: One of them is the average chump, whom she is bored to death with, who will put her on a pedestal, fulfill each and every one of her wishes and so on. The other is the typical jerk who acts Manly at times, but doesn’t know how to treat her. Usually she will stay with the jerk instead of the average fool, but won’t be satisfied with either of them deep inside. But a real Man knows HOW TO TREAT A WOMAN. And that’s not just about confidence. Never forget that women are not objects or devices of experimentation. They are wonderful human beings and everyday people, just like you. So treat them equally. They have bad days and good days. They pee and shit. And they especially like thoughtful words and little surprises. Sometimes being thoughtful or giving a little present will mean much more to a woman than a huge bank account. Hot girls are self-validation junkies. They crave attention and appreciation. If you give her too much, like an average Joe would, she will get bored and leave you quickly. If you give her too little, she will end up seeking it from other guys. The best strategy is to REWARD her with validation. It’s a powerful tool. This will be a crude comparison, but think dog training. When the dog does something bad, he is scolded. But, when he does something to the liking of his owner, he is rewarded with a treat. It’s the same with women. Reward her when she does something that you like. You don’t have to buy presents. Kind words like, “I was thinking about you, remembered your beautiful smile, and it made me happy!” are usually more than enough. On the contrary, never give in to wacky wishes of girls. It’s easy to go from one extreme to the other. If she wants to go shopping while you’re watching your favorite sports program, tell her to wait or go alone. Then another time when she doesn’t expect it, say that you decided to skip watching your favorite sports today and you want to take her out instead. The key is in the attitude. In the first case, she’s being insistent. In the second, you are rewarding her for being a “good girl.” You are the Man, and it’s your decision. You are CONSISTENT within your MANLY FRAME, while being KIND and CARING at the same time. By the way, why don’t you get bored while playing sports? Because of competition and CHALLENGE. It’s the same with girls. Keep them on their toes. Be a CHALLENGE. Women love that. It’s part of being a Man and having OPTIONS. Show her that you are in control. Refuse what she wants today; give it to her tomorrow when she’s not expecting it. Push her away; then pull her back. This creates tension and excitement. Compliment her when you feel like it, but never overdo it. If you wake up every morning and tell her how beautiful she is, it will get boring quickly. But, if you tell her randomly, when she doesn’t expect it, it will make her happy. So compliment women, and give them kind words. Show your girl that you care for her and think about her. Surprise her sometimes, but NEVER OVERDO ANY OF THESE. They are wonderful tools as long as they keep their value. If a product goes into mass production, it loses its luxury worth in the market and

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becomes commercial. If there were an Eiffel Tower in every city, would it be a curiosity? No. So treat the above tools the same way. Think twice before using them, but make sure you use them AT TIMES. Last, here is another exercise. Some of the ideas described above might seem strange or unfounded. I want you to discover their power on your own. Read this chapter again a few more times, and think about it. Keywords are confidence, leading, making her feel safe, taking responsibility, not being needy, having self-respect, knowing how to be a gentleman and knowing how to treat women. When you feel that you have these concepts down in your head, ask a girl you know how she would define a “real Man.” If you can collect your thoughts and tell her about the topics behind the keywords I just mentioned, she will be astonished.

Common Errors I’m sure you’ve had a date with a girl that didn’t go the way you expected. It happens to everyone. Just realize that it’s not a matter of some invisible cloud following you around. How women respond to you depends on your personality and Manliness. There are common errors men tend to make when going out with a woman. Small details count a lot in the big picture. A little bit of inconsistency within your Manly frame, and you lose her. This is what I’ll be talking about in this chapter. The biggest mistake you can make is to treat a woman as if she is different by putting her on a pedestal or looking down on her and treating her bad. Most guys, on seeing an attractive woman, are like, “OMG, she is soooo hot and beautiful. I don’t really deserve such a girl …” Why? Why don’t you deserve her? Because she is hot? Is she above you in any way? No. Is she more than you? No. She is a human being, just like you and me. Women expect you to be a bit above them. They like it when they can look up to a man and not only because you are taller. Have qualities that she can admire in you, the most important of which are your personality and ability to lead her in the right direction. Flowers and presents. They are wonderful tools for keeping a relationship and showing a woman how important she is to you — but not for seducing her. It’s a common misconception that you will lay her by buying her flowers or gifts. A Man would reward her with that. But why should she be rewarded when you don’t even know her? When you go out with a girl, she is usually a complete stranger to you. Do you buy flowers for strangers? No. Do you send gifts to strangers? No. It’s OK to do so when you’re in love with her, and she’s in love with you. But please, forget those tools for the first few weeks at least. Most guys who try to date her will bring flowers or chocolate bonbons. She just laughs at such lame attempts. Separate yourself from the crowd. Be different. A Man doesn’t need to stand in line. He knows what he wants, and he knows how to get it. Complimenting. It’s easy to go the wrong way with compliments. A compliment here and there is fine, but avoid overdoing them. They get boring quickly. How you compliment her matters a lot: “Oh, you look soooo beautiful!” — This is lame. You are putting her on a pedestal. You praise her looks — she has heard this a thousand times already. Her looks are genetics. She can’t influence that. Another bad one: “Nice ass!” — Macho-style compliment. This is again a stupid way to do it. Compliment your buddy’s girl to your buddy like that, but not the girl you’re seeing. If she’s hot, she likes to be complimented because of her personality, style or general outlook. No one does that. She’ll be flattered by your noticing it. Tell

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her she has a beautiful smile and that you like it when she smiles. Tell her she has nice earrings and that you like her taste. Tell her that you like her perfume and that it’s one of your favorites. Compliments should always be short, to the point and uncomplicated. “Your eyes look like a hundred shining stars in the moonlight.” — Leave this one for the poets. Just say: “Your eyes are beautiful. I like looking at them.” The way you speak is very important. Be calm, relaxed and not overly excited when complimenting her. Speak slowly, look into her eyes and smile. Charm her like a real Man. Deliver compliments in a slow, soothing, seductive voice. Don’t act like Romeo and overdo the seductive part, because it will sound stupid. Be casually confident in your role. Money. Money is a sign of power. If a guy earns a lot, he must be very successful in life. It also provides safety in the form of financial stability. Then again, a real Man won’t need much cash to seduce a girl. She will feel safe with him, and there will be no need for the extra financial support. Never waste your money on women or give useless presents. It’s OK to invite her to the movies or pay on the first date. But, if you do, expect her to pay on the second. If she doesn’t offer, ask her to contribute. Don’t force her to pay the whole bill though; a Man is always a gentleman. If you pay on the first date and she doesn’t offer to pay at least her part on the second, that’s a sign that you might have found a gold-digger chick. Avoid those. Spend money on a woman when you want to and not when she demands it. If she begs you to buy her some new clothes or something, firmly refuse. But, if you are in a relationship, and you would like to see her in sexy lingerie, buy some as a present. Do you see the difference between the two frames? The latter is your decision and not something she “ordered.” A note for rich guys: It’s OK to spend money on a girl at your level. If you eat at the trendiest, most expensive restaurant every day and you can afford it, don’t take her to some cheap place. Take her into your reality. If you drive a Ferrari, don’t go on your date by bus. And don’t boast about “how cool you are” either. And finally, don’t buy her off. If she becomes demanding and asks for too much in your reality, refuse it. The same holds true for guys who are not so wealthy. Spend money on the girl at your level. If you can’t afford to go to a trendy restaurant yourself, don’t scrimp and save just to take a woman there. Choose a cheap but romantic place instead where the food is good. Or go for no-cost dates like a romantic walk in the park. Never try to hide your financial situation. If you have a cheap car, don’t rent an expensive one to take a woman on a date. She will find out about your financial situation sooner or later. Don’t forget: Women will love you because you are a Man and NOT BECAUSE OF YOUR MONEY. Going physical. Not touching her or initiating kissing or sex is a big problem. It is the man who always has to make the first move. The girl will give signs that she is ready; you have to read them and advance accordingly. If you force going physical too early, she will freak out and run away. If you do it too late, she will think that you’re afraid. It’s also necessary to build the foundation. She won’t be comfortable kissing you if you’ve never touched her before. Touch her occasionally on the arms, shoulders or hands in a casual way. It’s a normal, everyday thing to do. There’s no need to go to the other extreme and become a touchy-feely guy though. And don’t forget you always have to be the one initiating; she won’t do it for you. When you see that she’s ready, go in for the kiss and so on. Sense of humor. In most surveys of women about the ideal guy, humor comes up as one of the most important qualities for a man to have. Never be too serious on your dates. Enjoy your time together,

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laugh at each other’s jokes and, when the situation calls for something funny, tell her something funny. You’re not expected to joke like a stand-up comic would; just be yourself. Everyone has a little sense of humor, and that’s more than enough. If she’s attracted to you, she will laugh at even your lamest high school jokes and think you are a funny guy. So don’t hold back, and don’t keep a straight face for the whole time. Self-irony is also a good quality to have. Be able to laugh at yourself, not just at other people. And finally, smile. You can never smile too much. Women love a Man who smiles a lot — it makes both you and your girl feel good. Friends zone. Probably the thing you dread most in your interactions with women is hearing: “Let’s just be friends, OK?” You don’t want them as friends. I’m sure you have already heard that line and have a few girl “friends.” You might have even used it on girls who didn’t meet your standards. Well, those words mean that you fucked something up. To put it bluntly, you were a pussy and not a Man. Usually, you either get together with a woman or she brushes you off sooner or later. But, in this case, you acted like a typical “nice” guy. You don’t want that, right? So stop acting the way you did to get there. Possible reasons follow. Being a mama’s boy. Girls sense it instantly and leave. If you’re over 25 and still living with your parents, maybe you should think about that just a bit. Looking to your mother for decisions, running to her when something goes wrong, not being able to separate from your parents or take responsibility, asking their advice on everything, having no goals of your own, being unable to provide for yourself, lacking independence. Are these the qualities of a Man? How could you provide for somebody else, when you can’t even provide for yourself? Look at yourself objectively and, if you recognize any of these traits in your personality, change them for good. Being macho instead of being a Man. Yep. It’s a common misconception that women want machos. No, they want a Man. A macho is loud, bold and aggressive instead of being confident. He’s trying to hide his insecurities with such behavior. Never mix the two. A Man is by no means aggressive. He is calm and cool. Machos are sometimes full of themselves. A Man knows his limits and never boasts about himself. He knows that people around him will look up to him, and he doesn’t need to look for their approval. Even if machos get women, it’s because of the jerk side of them. You don’t need that to get the hottest girls. Keep this in mind, and when you experiment with leading and becoming a Man, avoid the macho trap. If you are shy, don’t overcompensate by becoming arrogant and aggressive. Advance slowly. Confidence and leading will come with practice.

Investing In Yourself First impressions make a lasting impact on people, especially women. When women can spend a lot of time and energy grooming themselves, just to seem attractive to the members of opposite sex, why not men? Today, fashion and style interest men more than ever, as they realize that looking good is an asset in every aspect of their lives, be it business, personal or social. A few simple things are all that need to be kept in mind while grooming yourself. Take out some time to care for your face, nails and feet. All those men who are willing to make the right impression should check out the following tips to know how they can look good, change their image and have a lasting impression on women.

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I hope I don’t need to stress how important it is to be well groomed, neat and looking your best when meeting girls. They spend hours in front of the mirror to look good; we can at least be hygienic. Shave every day, wash your hair, use deodorant, wash your cock — this is common knowledge. Cut the nails on your hands and feet, and clean the dirt from under your nails. Use foot-antiperspirants if your feet smell bad. Clean your shoes often, and always iron your clothes. Mind the color of your socks, and don’t mix them. Put on a clean shirt and underwear every day. 1. Indulge In Skin Care. Improve the look of your skin by using the right products, on a regular basis. Protect your skin from ageing and sun damage by purchasing a moisturizer with sun protection. Get some skin products with retinol that help minimize fine lines and prevent wrinkles to quite a degree. Creams with vitamin E help in revitalizing your skin, thus should be kept handy. 2. Keep Acne At Bay. A lot of creams, soaps, cleansers, and medications have come up to treat acne spots in men. However, rather than trying out any new product that comes in the market, it is better to consult a dermatologist and get specialized treatment. 3. Get Rid Of Body Odor. Huge amounts of acrid body odor are just not acceptable and prove to be a big turn off for women. Wash yourself and shower as often as possible. Use anti-perspirants and deodorants to regulate odor and sweat. 4. Try New Hair Cut. Visit a good salon and learn about the latest fashion trends and products in the market. Get a good haircut that brings out your best facial features. Also, get a shampoo that makes your hair look good. If opting to change your hair color, get it professionally done. I suggest visiting the best salon in your city. Don’t spare money on your looks. Ask the stylist what hairstyle he/she thinks would be the best for your face and character. Just by getting a stylish and cool haircut, you can change your image a lot. If long hair goes well with your face, wear it that way (but keep it clean!). If shorter or totally bald is better, go for that look. Don’t be afraid to ask your hairstylist; he’s there to help. If you don’t want to spend that much money, go to the best salon once, show your new haircut to your favorite hairstylist and have him/her cut it that way afterwards. 5. Follow Trendy Hair Styles. Hair styles require products to keep them at their best. Products such as waxes, gels, sprays, mousses and volumizers help in keeping the hairstyles stay put. In case you are balding, keep your hair short, as it looks best that way. 6. Have Balanced Diet. Include fresh vegetables and fruits in your diet to keep you healthy and improve your skin and hair. Take dietary food supplements and vitamins, if a proper and healthy diet is not possible. Also, reduce your intake of fast foods. 7. Wear Smart Clothing. Wear clean, smart and trendy clothes. Keep your teeth clean and use a mouth wash. Visit your dentist regularly. Keep your nails trimmed and clean and avoid biting them. Change your socks and underwear on a daily basis; This is one of the most important things about your looks. Go to the trendiest club in your city and take a look at how guys dress. If you think it might suit your image, look at what models wear. Go to the nearest shopping center with one of your friend girls (or, if you have to go alone, ask the shop clerk), and buy some stylish new clothes. Read fashion magazines or men’s magazines. Always dress fashionably. Find a style that suits your personality which is trendy at the same time.

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8. Working out. Take up a sport. If you’re fat, lose weight. I recommend diets that separate protein from carbs (not to be confused with low-carb diets, which can be very unhealthy), but talk to your dietitian before doing anything crazy. I also advocate becoming a vegetarian, because it’s good for your health and helps you keep yourself in balance. But, before you do anything, always ask for advice from an expert, or consult the proper books!; If you are slim, put on some muscle. It’s a good idea to look buffed up a little. You don’t have to be another Schwarzenegger, but take good care of your body. If you don’t want to work out, take up martial arts or dancing. Both provide good instruction in how to be a Man. 9. Glasses. Unless you are a Brad Pitt or a Johnny Depp, Glasses usually won’t look good on you. Drop them, and wear contact lenses instead. There are very few people who look good in glasses. If you have to wear them, try to find a pair that suits the shape of your face. Sunglasses can make you look cool in the summer. Just choose them wisely. You can ask a clerk at the shop to help you find a good pair. 10. Shaving. Shave your face, or trim your beard. If you have too much hair on your body, trim it or depilate it to make yourself look smoother. It doesn’t matter whether you keep your pubic hair or shave it off, but if you keep it, make sure that it’s well trimmed and looks neat. If you wear sleeveless T-shirts, shave your armpits. 11. Take care of yourself, both inside and out. Try some type of meditation or yoga to balance yourself and become focused. Don’t listen to the macho crap that tells you such things are for women only. If you have a war going on inside, you won’t look calm and confident on the outside. Be comfortable in your own body, Meditation help you relax which gives you a better feeling, when you feel good, you will most likely attract beautiful women, when you are all tight up and feel like crap, you will attract nothing but trouble, that’s the law of life! Such small details are very important to women. When making your first impression, they will judge you based on this. Even if you don’t consider yourself good-looking, there are certain steps you can take to LOOK YOUR BEST. You don’t have to look as if you just stepped out of some fashion magazine, but a Man knows how to dress and how to look fine. Just by doing that, he leaves a good impression on people. If you look like a nerd, you’re making your own life harder.

Your Body Language My name is Bond. James Bond. Don’t laugh: Even though they’re just fiction, you can learn a lot from James Bond movies. He is a true Man. Let’s play a little bit. Imagine that you got the role of James Bond in an upcoming movie. How would you prepare yourself for it? You would probably watch most of the James Bond films already out there and practice in front of a mirror to make your part fit the original character perfectly. Now I don’t ask you to watch all the James Bond films. But I ask you to watch a few, and instead of focusing on the spectacular action scenes, pay attention to the main character. Observe how he walks, how he talks, the tone of his voice and how he interacts with women. What he says is not that important, but how he says it — you can learn a lot from that. He is always confident, calm and casual. He knows how to lead, and he knows that women will always follow him, without doubt. So I suggest you go to your favorite video store now and rent a few James Bond films if you haven’t already done so.

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Here is a list describing confident, Manly body language. Use it to calibrate yours: 1. Arms. Folding your arms is a closed position. It means that you could be hiding something, you’re not comfortable, you don’t want to talk, or you don’t like what the other person is saying. A confident Man is always comfortable and doesn’t have to hide anything. He usually has his arms by his sides or partially in his pockets. 2. Legs. Closing your legs, crossing them or keeping your feet together might show insecurity. Stand with your feet wider apart. Of course, a 4.5-foot straddle would be ridiculous. Stand in a comfortable, natural way. 3. Eyes. Most of the time, you should look the other person in the eyes. Don’t stare at her awkwardly; just catch a glance here and there and maintain eye contact when you can. Never stare at the ground when talking to someone either. You are not a kid who got bad grades in school and is afraid to talk to daddy. Look away to the side, but never down. Confidence should be radiating from your glance. 4. Posture. Stand erect, and don’t bow your back. And, since I suspect no one pushed a post up your ass, don’t stand firmly in a stiff way. You can stand loose without arching your back, right? Right. 5. Smiling. It’s always a good idea to smile. It disarms people. It’s scientifically proven that smiling will not only give good feelings to the smilee, but to the smiler as well. Yes, that’s you. So don’t be afraid to do it. You shouldn’t always have a big grin on your face, but when talking to women or approaching a girl, make sure to smile a lot. It makes a good impression and even helps her loosen up while talking to you. She won’t be as afraid as she would be if you approached with a serious look on your face. So remember what I say, and drop the macho thing, OK? A confident person is usually in a relaxed and comfortable state. He avoids making fast moves. He doesn’t play with his fingers or shake his legs nervously. Every move you make and every muscle you move should be the result of a conscious decision and not caused by anxiety. Walk slowly, but casually. Don’t walk like a robot, please. Be calm and relaxed. You are not in a hurry. You don’t have to run. You are not being chased. Move at your own pace. And don’t be afraid to take up some space as you move. Of course, you don’t want to walk with your hands spread 6 feet apart, but show that you can fill the space around you. A selfish person will take all the space he can; a confident person takes as much as he needs, but doesn’t ask permission for it. Always be comfortable in your own skin. If you feel good in a certain position, it will be visible to others as well. And remember, this is just for practicing. Don’t be stupid, and don’t think that the more you exaggerate the above, the more Manly you will look. One more thing I want to talk about is voice tone. Some guys might have problems with their voices. If your voice is high like a girl’s, it’s not very Manly. A Man has a low, calm, soothing, seductive voice. It should come from the chest/abdomen area and not from your throat. You can practice by yourself: Repeat saying a compliment like, “You have a beautiful smile. I like it.” Keep doing it. Start normally; then lower your voice a bit. Slow down a little. Practice till it sounds like James Bond saying: “My name is Bond. James Bond.” If you have a microphone, it’s a good idea to record your attempts and listen to them later. If you have the patience and the time, I suggest you experiment with your voice a few minutes every day for a week or more. Then each day after a short practice, play it back to learn how you still need to improve. On to the next step, Mr. Bond.

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Her Body Language As men, we don’t pay much attention to our body language on a day to day basis. Big mistake, how would a woman decode your thoughts and know what it is you want from her, your body language can be even more telling than spoken words. Men can be hard to read, so if you want to hit on a woman before speaking to her, take a look at these examples: Men are often confused because women’s verbal and nonverbal messages seem to conflict, sending you “mixed signals.” Here is the key…experts predict that 7% of a woman’s attraction is shown through her verbal communication; 38% from her tone and 50% from her body language. What does this mean? Learning to read body language is the key to successful seduction! So, what are the signs that she is interested? 1. If she points toward you or faces you, she is probably attracted to you. She may point with her shoulder, her leg or her whole body. Beware if she seems to be pointing the opposite direction; it is time to move on. 2. Watch her eyes. If her eyes are not straying around the room and seem to be focused intently on you, she is most likely interested. Are her eyes dilated? This is kind an unfair indicator because she has no control over it, but when a woman is attracted to you, her eyes will slightly dilate while interacting with you. 3. Does she seem to be involved in your phone conversation? If she is attracted to you, nothing else is going to occupy her attention while you are talking on the phone with a friend or another girl perhaps. 4. The more you see of her wrists, palms and the inside of her arms, the better. Look for signs of nervousness. She may show this through fidgeting with an object or adjusting her hair or clothes. If she is nervous, she probably likes you. 5. Smiles are great! If she smiles at you when your eyes collide you can assume that she is defiantly interested. 6. Does she seem relaxed around you? A woman who is interested in you will face you directly, lean in and relax her body. Folded arms, a stiff back and leaning away from you are signs that she wants out of the situation. 7. The best and easiest predictor of her attraction is her physical contact with you. Does she frequently touch your hand or keep it hidden in her pocket? Does she touch your arm or leg when she is making a point? The more physical contact she has with you during your conversation, the better. Warning! Beware of the shy or awkward flirter. The signs may be very confusing. She may be restless or quiet due to nervousness. She may not understand how to use her body language to give you the “okay.”

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If you sense that a woman may be awkward or shy but interested, look for nervousness when you approach her directly or look intently into her eyes. Watch her pupils to see if they change size. When you are in the same room, frequently glance in her direction to see if she is watching you. If you catch her stealing glimpses of you, go ahead—she is most likely interested. Learning to read body language helps you weed those who are attracted to you from those who are polite, but uninterested. Study her nonverbal cues; if they seem to indicate an attraction toward you…go for it! If she pushes her fingers through her hair, she is looking to get your attention. Clean and neat hair is as important for a woman as acceptable height, wide shoulders and biceps for a man. The woman who grooms her hair with high care expresses that she is full of energy and feels like doing certain familyfriendly activities. The way she touches her hair is also very important. It tells you information about her temperament. If she does it slowly you have encountered a cunning expert of the art of love. Quick, nervy movements disclose impatience or embarrassment. If she touches the edge of the glass with her fingers, Freudian psychologists interpret it as a sexual sign. This theory is supported by the women themselves, who claim that they deliberately pet the glass, in order to call the chosen man’s attention upon themselves. When you enter a bar and see a fullbosomed blonde touching and caressing her martini glass so that it’d scream, do not think that she is expressing her musicality this way. Don’t ask her whether she is playing the latest hit of Iglesias. This question would not be appropriate. Instead of asking stupid questions, notice the way she is playing the "musical instrument". Elegant, caressing movement is a sign of intrinsic calmness, self-control and waiting, so sit by her. Her beating a rhythm on the glass with her nails is a sign of impatience ora broad hint of SOS, which she’s sending to her boyfriend, who is fighting for another Bailey’s at the bar. Her hands and arms If she leans on her hand with her chin and her eyes seem to be thinking, it’s not always the sign of her being impressed by your appearance. Generally the woman tries to answer her own question this way: "Does this guy deserve me" You know the answer, but the lady needs time. If you want to help her make the only right decision, be politely determinate and determinately polite. Flash your sense of humor as well. If she sits back with her arms crossed together, this is the worst possible thing you can encounter when out hunting. This gesture is evidence of the fact that you’ve made the worst impression of all on the woman and she doesn’t trust you at all. Nothing helps here, neither refined jokes, nor nice, muscular body. The way the woman herself thinks of her hands is also very important. If she stares at them for a very long time, it may imply that something angers her (perhaps you?). if she beats the rhythm on the table or the bar means a similar state of mind. You think she’s a wild cat, but you’re wrong. She’s thinking about a way how she could get rid of you.

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Her Lips If a woman wets her lips quite frequently, it’s either out of habit or desire to get you to pay attention to her lips and sooner or later kiss her. When a woman is biting her lips, you may assume that she’s nervous. Why? Perhaps you are staring at her too quizzingly. Attempting to look attractive, if you observe carefully, it’s really not hard to notice when a woman is making an effort to appear attractive, she squeezes her lips, lean her head to the side, and her hands are stroking her hair while she is either looking towards you, or above you (in your direction).

Taking Care Of Yourself This is the most important of all. I have met many guys on Internet forums who are trying to learn how to pick up women. They spend their time memorizing techniques, stories and routines to become better at picking up the hotter girls. Ultimately, most of them end up burned out and still without a life. Look, if you want to have success with women, you have to get your own life under control first. If you are a nerd and don’t have hobbies apart from sitting in front of the computer and watching porn, get a life — as crude as it sounds. A Man is PASSIONATE. He has goals and dreams for his life, and he is DETERMINED to GET WHAT HE WANTS. A woman loves listening to a man who talks passionately about his hobbies, job or whatever. She wants to share his dreams and be a part of his wonderful world. If you don’t have a life outside the club where you picked her up, how can she be a part of something that doesn’t exist? She can’t. There are hobbies that are particularly good for experiencing what it means to be a Man. Martial arts, dancing or anything competitive fits into this category. Even extreme sports fit, but they can be hazardous to your health. You’ll have to decide this for yourself, but here’s what I did: I took a salsa dancing course. Since then, I’ve become a fanatic. When you dance, you learn to let go of everyday stress and feel totally free. It’s also one of the best ways to learn indirect communication with females. In salsa (and other dances that involve couples), you are forced to lead. The woman won’t know what’s coming next; it will always be a surprise for her. Imagine standing on the dance floor. You make eye contact with a girl, walk up to her confidently and ask for a dance. Then you grab her hand without waiting for a reply, lead her to the dance floor and start dancing with her. In such situations, you will FEEL what it’s like to be a Man. The sexy look in her eyes, how she glances at you, expecting you to lead — that’s when you realize what being a Man means. You learn to lead and make decisions. You learn to push and pull her gently. You learn about the subtle power play going on between the male and the female on the parquet. Do you FEEL what I’m talking about? Have you noticed that when you stress too much about something and keep waiting for it anxiously, it just won’t happen? Like when you’re looking for your keys and turn the whole house upside down to find them. Only after you stop caring so much and say, “Damn it, I give up!” will you find the keys — right under your nose. This is true of everything in life. When you want something so desperately, you

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won’t get it. But when you can let go of your obsessive feelings and learn to care less about it, you will achieve your goal. There is a method for getting anything you want. First, know what it is, and decide if you really want it. Second, be determined, resolute and ready to do anything to get it. Third, take the steps necessary to achieve your goal. Remember, you can’t win the lottery if you don’t play — no matter how resolute you are. And the fourth step is: After you’ve done everything you can, let it go. Yes, let it go. Forget about the whole thing, and stop caring so much. That’s the hardest part. But only then will you arrive at the fifth step, which is reaching your goal. It’s exactly the same with women. After you’ve done what you can to accomplish your goal, let go of your obsession. Go out occasionally, socialize, make friends and live a busy life. As soon as you forget what you wanted so much, you’ll have girls flocking around you. Time and patience are necessary to achieve success with women. The busier you are, the less time you have to feel sorry for yourself because of not getting women or not getting the ones you want, and the more likely that you’ll be successful. I’ve mentioned meditation before. It gives you power. You learn to release unnecessary feelings, to focus on important things intensely, to clear your mind and to keep yourself discipline. All of these will contribute to your becoming a Man. Inner balance brings outer balance that is visible to women. Learn to control yourself. The only person you can control in this world is YOU. If you just understand that, you will be way ahead of the crowd and find yourself leading others. A strong leader always has very strong self-control. He doesn’t want to control anyone, just himself and his reality, and the people follow him. With women, focus your mind on the inside. Believe in what you do, and believe that you will make women follow you. We make our own reality by the way we see it. Your perception of the world is like a boomerang. It’s a subjective thing, which you can change, but it also comes back and influences you at the same time. You can see the world as an aggressive, hostile place and behave defensively, or you can build a friendly environment around yourself by acting accordingly. There is nothing you can’t reach. Again, this requires a lot of practice. This is what life is about.

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Part 3: Meeting Girls Your Goals Your first step is to decide what kinds of women you want. Even the best seducers have a certain group of girls that they are better with. For example, if you are in your 20s, you might be into picking up party chicks and having a new girl in your bed every night. If you are in your 40s, however, and looking for a wife, disco girls might not be your cup of tea. So know what you’re looking for, and form your strategies accordingly. There are young girls and older women. There are highly educated and less educated ones. You will find some of them in clubs and others at exhibitions, the theater or your own social circle. Generally, older women are much easier to find and seduce. They are either singles with a strong sex drive and a massive amount of frustration or married women who are bored with their husbands and their lives as housewives. As women grow older, they start to have fewer and fewer options. As you get older, you will have more and more. So be patient. Younger girls will always have more choices. They will be able to select from a wild variety of males, especially if they look good. Whatever you want, you will have to figure out the best way to get it. Let me give you a few examples: If you want to become a player, you’ll probably go clubbing at least two or three nights a week. If you’re an artist or a Bohemian type, you’ll be found at art exhibitions or modern theaters talking to women with similar interests. If you like cooking, you’ll go to a cooking class to meet such women. If you are a New Age guy, you’ll visit programs that attract New Age girls. If you’re into fundamentalist Christian women, you’ll develop a routine of going to the church and eying them, then come up with a way to talk to them. Brainstorm. If you like girls who are into sports, get a pair of skates and hang at the local skating park. When a hot girl comes by, approach her and talk to her. After some experimentation and a few crashand-burns, you’ll find certain repeating schemes in your conversations. With a skater girl, you won’t talk about modern art; while at the exhibition, the girl you’re talking with might not be interested in your rock-climbing adventures.

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The basic steps are: 1. Think about what you’re like, and decide what kind of woman you want and what qualities she should have. Of course, you should take it one step at a time and be realistic. If you’re a virgin, you won’t become a player next week and bed the hottest Playboy models. You’ll have to put a lot of time and energy into achieving your goals. Stay rational, and never aim at something you know you can’t have in the near future. It’s better to have short-term goals and small successes than to have a big disappointment. Write down the type of women you want to attract, how will she look like?, hair color?, hobbies? What are the “Must Have” qualities in her? (if you are a socialist, and she is a born capitalist, it will never work), write down a list of parameters which your dream woman must have: _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________ Don’t move to the next step before you complete the last section, if you are reading this book simply for the sake of reading it, quit right now and give it to someone who will take advantage of it, do the materials if you plan to ever get results from this book, you have nothing better to do right now anyway, you’re reading! So come on, do the exercises, and you will be amazed at the results. 2. Think about where your type of woman can be found in your city. Write down a list of possible location in which you can locate you’re “pray”, if an alligator wishes to feast on dear or buffalo, he would not go towards the trees or the deeps on the water, but will hide in the water near the shore; you should do the same thing, write down the places in which you may find your dream women. If the woman of your dream is a business woman, you will be wise to join networking groups for business man and business women, if your dream girl is a wild soul, try a dirt bike club, wealthy? – try the golf course, a model? – try hanging around agencies, smart and nerdy? Try the book club, library, park bench, you get the point. No websites for now, you need experience - If you want a more detailed list, keep reading it’s two pages down .

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Location 1: ___________________________________________________ Location 2: ___________________________________________________ Location 3: ___________________________________________________ Location 4: ___________________________________________________ Location 5: ___________________________________________________ Location 6: ___________________________________________________ Location 7: ___________________________________________________ Location 8: ___________________________________________________ Location 9: ___________________________________________________ Location 10: ___________________________________________________

3. Frequent these events or places. If you don’t find what you’re looking for, go back to Step 1 or 2. Right down a list of at least one place in which you intend to visit today, not tomorrow, not in three days from now, once you done reading this chapter (which is not very long), you will drop the book –leave your house, and go to that place for one propose, and one propose only! – to come back home with a new phone number in your phone, there are no shortcuts, if you feel that you are not good enough, you need a reality check – I meet plenty of rich and beautiful women who date the most ugly looking, nerdy people, why? Because it’s not your looks, it’s your confidence and personality that counts. So get over yourself, and write down 1 place to which you will visit today, and another place to which you will visit for every other day throughout the week, including the weekend. Sunday: ____________________________________________________. Monday: ____________________________________________________. Tuesday: ____________________________________________________. Wednesday: ____________________________________________________. Thursday: ____________________________________________________. Friday: ____________________________________________________. Saturday: ____________________________________________________. 4. Talk to the women that you meet. Get to know what they’re into and what they’re like; find common interests with them. Write down a list of topics that will interest your dream lady, starting from animals, food, family, etc. _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________

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5. After meeting women of the type you’re interested in, you’ll form a picture in your mind of their general traits. From this point on, you’ll be able to tailor your conversations accordingly and to develop a certain routine. Such things might include telling the skater girls your favorite bungee-jumping story or taking them to the café around the corner, which happens to be a romantic little place just below your apartment. Of course, in the end, most of these skater chicks will end up in your apartment … Write down at least 5 new things you learned about your dream lady, now that you spoke to at least 5 different dream ladies, I am assuming that you have been doing these homework’s: 1. _________________________________________________________________________________ 2. _________________________________________________________________________________ 3. _________________________________________________________________________________ 4. _________________________________________________________________________________ 5. _________________________________________________________________________________

6. Keep your eyes open, and be prepared to meet women ANYWHERE. For example, don’t limit yourself to skater girls when you work in proximity to an all-girl boarding school. Now that you’ve been flooded with information, here’s a list of places to meet women (which is not intended to be exhaustive): 1. The street 2. Shopping centers 3. Clubs and bars 4. Dance schools 5. High school and university campuses 6. Language schools and courses that interest you 7. The office 8. Festivals and programs 9. Museums, art exhibitions, galleries 10. Concerts and the theater 11. While you’re on vacation 12. Your own social circle or house parties 13. The ice-skating rink 14. The beach 15. Your neighborhood 15. Playing sports (tennis, squash, billiards, etc.) 16. The park 17. While walking your dog 18. A café 19. The library 20. Church 21. The gym 22. Yoga class

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And the list goes on … possibilities are endless. You can hardly name a place where it’s impossible to meet girls. Many couples meet by accident, and such “accidents” can happen anywhere. Of course, no one says you can’t help those little accidents happen at your favorite skating park or anywhere else. One thing I learned about setting goals, is that once you set it, you must do something towards it immediately, otherwise you lose momentum, right now – I want you to drop everything, place a sign in the book so that you’ll know where you left, and get busy, right now! Call a good friend (preferably a female friend) and tell her/him to go with you to pick up girls. And again, to emphasis the point that looks mean nothing, Jerry Seinfeld told NBC that in one of his Seinfeld episodes his character convinced a woman to go on a date with him, while riding the elevator, the freaking elevator, later he told that this was based (like most Seinfeld’s episodes) on a real event, he was riding in an elevator (long before he was famous) and got a date with a beautiful woman during the 25 second elevator ride, by using his sense of humor, that comes to show you – use your strengths to your advantage. Before you begin, decide NOW what you are willing to invest in this. You know your skill (whether you’re a virgin or you have a few trophies behind you), and you probably have an idea of how much work you will need to improve your odds. Judging from my own experience, I don’t suggest devoting all your time to learning to pick up girls — going out five days a week can exhaust you, and it’s easy to lose motivation quickly. Never forget that women should be a part of your life, not your reason for living. On the other hand, if you sit home all week, you won’t get good results either. The mentality to avoid is: “It feels so safe and warm at home. I won’t go out today, maybe next time …” And this goes on for months or years, while you gradually fall into a depression. Women won’t fly to your house; you will have to go out and get them. So leave the safety of your home and socialize. Work on making friends and meeting new people. It’s the first step to success with women: learning to be a social person. Even if you’ve just moved to a city, get out of the house and do something. Everybody has an interest or a hobby to share with other people. I don’t care what it takes to get you outside, just do it. Sign up to take dancing lessons or a foreign language course; visit a sports club — it doesn’t matter. Go out once, twice or three times a week, visit new places, meet new people, and feel good in your skin. Finally, don’t forget that success won’t come in an hour or two; you’ll have to work at it. They say that when you’re learning something new (like martial arts), after six months, you will know what it’s about. After one year, you’ll know a few things. In four years, you’ll consider yourself to be fairly good. Another 10 years, and you become a master — only to realize how many things you don’t know yet … So keep this in mind when setting up your goals, and don’t be disappointed if success doesn’t come tomorrow. With time and determination, you will succeed eventually.

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Overcoming your fear of talking to women Shyness is a debilitating condition for many men. It prevents them from functioning in social situations, from voicing their real concerns, and most sadly, from approaching the woman of their dreams. The truth is that many shy men are exactly the kind of guys women look for. But since they're too timid, women get left with the swaggering jerks they always complain about but seem to date exclusively. If shyness has kept you from getting that special lady, read on to see how you can overcome it. Step 1 - Practice with a friend. One of the big factors in shyness is the fear of rejection. Eliminate this factor by approaching and picking up a woman for your friend or your brother (but make sure your friend knows!). Since your own ego isn't at stake, you'll be less inhibited in your approach. You'll see it's no big deal and will want to pick up for yourself next time. Step 2 - Focus on baby steps. Treat dating like a 12-step program. Start with a smile; show everyone (not just the cute girls) you're friendly and approachable. On following days, move up to saying "hi." A few days after that, engage in small talk. Keep going as you gradually open yourself up to people and see it's not as hard as you thought. If you make a blunder, forget about it. Most people are more forgiving than you think. If beautiful women intimidate you, take baby steps up the beauty scale. Start by approaching more average-looking women you feel confident with. As you become at ease with them, move on to prettier women, and so on. Step 3 - Start by asking this special girl simple questions. You can show that you care by asking her simple questions, I have a good friend who meet girls almost exclusively in the New York Subway, by acting as if he have no idea which train to take, so he asks “Excuse me, do you know if the C train goes through here?”, after the obvious “Yes” or “I Don’t know”, he will replay “it’s so hard understanding the subway system, are you from here?”, and there you go, this will break the ice  Step 4 - Don't take things personally. If you want to succeed in the game of seduction, you can't take every comment, insinuation or joke that a woman might throw your way as a personal affront. People sometimes say things they don't mean. You'll have nothing to be self-conscious about if nothing bothers you Step 5 - Learn to listen. Don't do all the talking. Let women talk about themselves for a while. Ask openended questions and just sit back and listen. If the conversation lulls, have new conversation topics ready. And to ease the burden of initiating something, have a few icebreakers handy to get the ball rolling, if you are doing all the talking that will increase the nervousness If you are already shy and nervous around woman, shut up – let her talk by asking questions. Step 6 - Talk to a lot of people. Don't be afraid to chat up everyone you meet, from the old lady doing her groceries to the bank teller. Practice makes perfect Step 7 – Overcome the fear of rejection. Great boxers go in the ring knowing there's a chance they'll lose. Similarly, you can't expect to succeed every time. Nothing is 100%, so view every encounter with a woman as a positive learning experience. The trick here is to not be self-conscious. Shyness and hesitation occur when you think about your flaws. Instead, focus your thoughts entirely on the woman you're talking to. You'll forget about your jitters and she'll be flattered by the attention.

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Step 8 - Get out and socialize. Join activities in which you're always interacting with people, such as the gym, exercise classes, a college society, or a hobby club. In these environments, you must always socialize, and after a while, you'll get comfortable with it. Furthermore, you're practically guaranteed to meet interesting women. Step 9 – The buck starts with you. When you leave your shyness behind, which will take time and persistence, you'll see how much your life will change, as you'll begin to go after what you want with fewer fears. And here's a secret: should you enter a room and feel those familiar jitters, remember that most people you meet are too busy worrying about what others think about them to really notice and judge you.

Tips      

Imagine that you are talking to a friend. That will loosen the tension and allow more comfortable conversation. Make eye contact. This lets her know you are legitimately interested. But don't stare! Be yourself. Be respectful to women. They are not objects - always keep that in mind. Compliment the little things; the things that most men wouldn't notice. When you do that, you let her know that the little things she does don't go unnoticed, and makes her feel special. Never over-do anything. In fact, UNDER-do some things. If you drop that one little compliment, and leave it at that, she will want to talk to you more to see what else you have to say.

Warnings!  

NEVER Over-compliment. Drop one here or there, but if you over-compliment, that will introduce a feeling of awkwardness and disparity. Women like their men to be strong, not desperate. NEVER Complain. Girls hate it when men complain about their trouble when they first meet, that’s a waste of potential for great conversation.

Anyone who’s not used to approaching strangers will have a fear of approaching women. That’s normal. Some people will find it easy; some will find it really hard to overcome this. It’s like you’re an actor going on stage for the first time in front of a large audience. You will feel your heart pumping, butterflies in your stomach and a lump in your throat … Even the most seasoned actors will feel anxiety before going on stage, but the difference is that they LEARN TO CONTROL IT. So that’s what you will have to do as well. Learn to control your fear and anxiety of approaching women you don’t know. Women strangers — man, how scary does that sound? You never did that, right? You will, my friend, you will! There are two schools of thought on dealing with the fear of approaching strangers. The first advocates therapy, as ridiculous as that may sound. In my opinion, doing a few exercises in your imagination might help somewhat, but won’t bring noticeable results. What I subscribe to is shock therapy. That’s how I got rid of my fear back when. If you want to quit smoking, you won’t do it with a bunch of nicotine patches. You’ll have to make the decision to stop for good. From that point on, there is no more smoking. It’s the same with girls. You’re standing in a club surrounded by girls. Your heart is pounding. What should you do? You will decide to end your misery FOR ONCE and approach a girl RIGHT NOW …

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just one of them. Of course, your first approach won’t be perfect. But as the saying goes, practice makes perfect. And that’s why I recommend mass approaches for your first time. Look, I really don’t care what you say. But say something, and say it to as many girls as possible. The best environment for this would be a club. For the first few times, make sure you stay sober. Your only goal should be to overcome your fear of approaching girls. Alcohol will help with your inhibitions, but the next day, you will be the same person with the same fears and inner obstacles. Also, don’t bring any friends with you. They’ll just hold you back and contribute to your getting drunk. Go alone. If you can make sober approaches in a club, you will be able to make approaches ANYWHERE. Keep that in mind: ANYWHERE. Naturally, this is just the first step. On online seduction forums, there are many so-called seduction “gurus,” who advocate this style not just for overcoming your initial fears, but for getting girls EVERY TIME. True, it’s good for newbies, but not for the guys wanting more. It takes focus for the most important part: the conversation with the girl. So, once you get used to approaching random women, it’s time to switch gears and focus on approaching the ones you want.

But for now, to overcome your initial fears, practice the following exercise: 1. Choose a club and go out alone. If you want to take someone with you, take one friend who’s willing to learn and won’t hold you back. (maybe someone who is already taken) If he does, don’t take him the next time you go. If you have to go alone, go alone. I did it many times. It’s no biggie. Without company, you’re forced to talk to people, and you will approach women. Even if you don’t approach anyone the first night, you will have enough remorse to do it the next time you go out. Write it down right now:      

This Saturday night – what club are you going to? : _______________________________. What kind of girls can you expect to meet there? : ________________________________. What will you wear? : _______________________________________________________. How many girls will you hit on?: _______________________________________________. How many phone numbers will you come back with?: _____________________________. If you think big, will you come back home with a girl?: _____________________________.

TIP: Your success depends on your goal, if your goal is to get 2 numbers, you will barely talk to anyone! 2. Take a deep breath, try to loosen up as much as you can, and go up to a random girl. She doesn’t have to be the hottest one; your average girl will do for now. If she’s with a group, approach her directly. If she’s with two or three girls, talk to all of them at the same time. But whomever you approach, DON’T HESITATE. This is the most important part. The more you hesitate, the less likely you are to approach a girl. Don’t leave yourself time to think. Count to five and go! Banish negative thoughts from your mind, and forget “What happens if?” questions. Nothing happens. Treat the whole club as your playground. No one will laugh at you; no one will hurt you. It’s just some casual talking; no harm done to anyone, if your gutsy – invite her for a drink or ask her to dance.

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3. After you have approached a girl or a group, talk to her/them. Even if you’re hesitant, and your legs are shaking and your heart is pounding, force yourself to smile and tell her something. The best method is to memorize a line, an “opener,” and use that on every girl that night. This way, additional focus and energy won’t be required to think up something to say, and you can concentrate on controlling yourself and your body language. For example, you could use: “Hi! Let me ask you a question. How would you describe your ideal guy? What character traits and inner values should he have?” or “Hi! Do you see that girl over there? I like her, and I want to get to know her. What do you think I should tell her?” You can also make up your own lines. 4. Depending on how the conversation goes, either carry on or leave. Remember, your goal is not to bed her tonight, but don’t stop if that’s about to happen. After executing the opener into the conversation, you’ll understand how easy it is to talk to strangers, and you’ll realize you just took the first steps toward overcoming your “biggest” fear. How does it feel? 5. Don’t stop after talking to a girl or two. Carry on, and talk to as many girls as possible. Eight or 10 are OK; 20 are even better. You don’t have to run around trying your opening out on every girl and yelling “one!” “two!” “three!” Just approach as many of them as you want, remembering that your goal is to get used to the feel of the whole thing. The more you do it, the easier it will seem, and you will eventually realize how normal it is to talk to women. 6. When you go home, congratulate yourself. You took your first steps in the land of pickup. It was a small step for mankind, but a giant leap for you. Repeat this for a few nights until you feel comfortable in your own skin talking to girls. But, when you get into the game and start to enjoy it, don’t forget that the preceding exercise was only for “de-shying” yourself; for showing you how easy it is to talk to a girl. It’s not the way to proceed from now on. Your next step is to find the girls that you really like and approach only them. Up to this point, it would only have given you an excuse not to approach a woman. But, from now on, it will help you focus on the more important aspect, the pickup itself.

OK! Stop reading! Continue reading on Sunday morning, after returning from the club, don’t move to the next page! – good luck this Saturday! – Go Get Them Tiger!

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STOP READING PLEASE!  GOOD LUCK  Welcome back! I hope you didn’t continue to read, if you want results – you must go through the book exactly as described! Now, write down: After speaking to at least 3 girls at the club on Saturday night (I’m assuming you did, if you didn’t – why not!?, go back tonight to the fucking club and talk to at least 3 women, I challenge you! If you’re not going to do this, just give this book to someone who will use it!, try going back with a friend and tell him/her what your planning, that will defiantly help, he/she will push you to talk to women). Now, write down your opinion regarding each conversation, how would you rate it from 0 (being the worst) to 10 (being the best), and explain what went wrong, and what went perfectly right, what you can do to fix the negatives and strengthen the positives by next Saturday, if you don’t practice and revise, you have no chance, if you hit on a 1,000 girls you will have much more experience then someone who hit on 0, true or false?

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1st Girl: Grade: (__) What did you do good? What worked perfectly?: _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________ What went wrong? What did you do badly?: _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________________________ What must you work on, to improve your skills for next week? _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ How will you improve your chances? _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ 2nd Girl: Grade: (__) What did you do good? What worked perfectly?: _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________________

What went wrong? What did you do badly?: _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________

What must you work on, to improve your skills for next week?

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_____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________

How will you improve your chances? _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ 3rd Girl: Grade: (__) What did you do good? What worked perfectly?: _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ What went wrong? What did you do badly?: _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ What must you work on, to improve your skills for next week? _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ How will you improve your chances? _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________________________ Important: you should not be relinquished when it comes to speaking with women, Even if someone says something to you or behind your back, should it really concern you? beautiful women find less than attractive man who attempt to make a move towards them as brave, and about 80% of them, appreciates it, most men would be too scared to speak with a very beautiful women, that’s why you see many gorges women date ugly people, because they had the guts to ask them out.

But, before we move on, here’s a story from my life that you can use as motivation: When I was younger, I had a fear of approaching women. I was even too shy to go up to the girls in my high school

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who were one class below me. So I decided to “de-shy” myself. During the winter, I spent several days every week at the local ice-skating rink approaching girls with the lamest pickup lines you can imagine. “Hi! Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I skate through in front you again?” At that time, I thought they would work. Guess what: They didn’t. But I still forced myself to approach strangers, which gave me a strong base to build my game on.

Approaching her

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Now that you gained some experience and have scheduled the next 50 Saturday nights hitting different places to hit on women, it’s time for you to put some new knowledge to use, let’s see what NOT to say to girls upon approaching them. There are two main pickup centers: clubs and everywhere else. I’ve put clubs in a separate category, because they’re so different from the rest. It’s a whole art in itself. So we will talk about clubs for now. If you learn to pick up girls there, other venues will be a piece of cake. Let’s examine pickup lines first. Have you ever tried using them? I’m sure most guys have at least once or twice. Or more. “Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?” Sounds cheesy, doesn’t it? Pickup lines are L-A-M-E. She has heard them many times before. By using them, you become just another loser. Even if she likes you initially, you can easily ruin your chances with a lame line. So forget about pickup lines for good. Girls in clubs expect to be hit on by guys. That’s the main reason they go: to boost their egos or to have some fun with guys. When you approach a girl in a club, she will know what you’re up to. From the moment you open your mouth to speak, she will be sure that you’re at least a little interested in her. Otherwise, why would you talk to her in the first place? This puts her in a position of power. She is the selector now; she can decide to turn her back on you at any time. When she sees you approaching, her first thought will probably be: “Here’s another guy who wants something from me.” Her second thought will be either: “He seems different; let’s give him a chance.” or “No, not another loser. Where are they coming from? No more losers for tonight. Now get away from me!” To increase your chances, you have to separate yourself from the crowd. You have to be different from the rest, to give her a reason she should talk to you. There are many schemes that most guys follow. She knows all of these. At least three guys will approach her with: “Hi! I’m John. You come here often?” while she’s dancing. There’s something even better: buying her a drink. Forget about it — NOW. I don’t know who came up with such a stupid idea, but he must have been out of his mind. She gets five drinks a night and refuses another five. Hot girls spend ZERO, yes, ZERO money on drinks at clubs. It’s because there’s always a loser who buys them for her. She doesn’t even have to move a finger and has two drinks in front of her. Why would you invite her for a drink anyway? Do you know her? No. She is a total stranger to you. Do you invite your best buddies for a drink? Yes. Do you invite strangers? No. So treat her like one. Buying a drink is equivalent to approaching her with the following: “I want to fuck you, and I think that by buying you a few dollars’ worth of drinks, I’ll have a better chance of succeeding! So can we leave now?” Would you fuck a guy like that if you were a girl? Not likely! So forget about it. Even if she asks you to buy her a drink, firmly say, “No.” It’s one of her tests to decide how Manly you are. If you comply, she will lose interest in you immediately. Ninety-nine percent of the rest of the guys that a girl in a club meets will be from two categories: the ones who try to hide their intentions and the ones who are too direct and obvious about their intentions. Even if she hooks up with one of these guys, it’s because she liked him initially, and she would have smiled at him even if he had said, “Unga-bunga.” The first mistake to avoid is hiding your intentions. Trying to approach her with an excuse or by talking about the latest swimsuit fashions is just a waste of time. (Unless you are gay, of course, but then I’m sorry, you’re reading the wrong book! ) She might be entertained by it and, since your presence is nonthreatening to her, you might think that your pickup is going well. Then suddenly, you lose her. It’s

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normal: She’s not stupid, and she knows what you wanted from the beginning. The average club girl is approached 10 to 20 times a night by a large variety of guys, and she has much more experience in handling them than you do in handling girls. Don’t think you can fool her into believing you’re there for an hour just to have fun. A real Man will never hide what he wants and try to trick her — it just lowers your value in her eyes. The other mistake you can make is being too direct and obvious. “Wanna fuck?” is not the best way to impress a girl. Even if she’s a more experienced woman, she still has some of her little princess fantasies. If you start off by making your intentions to FUCK her clear, she will brush you off in a minute. We are wired differently. Men will jump straight into sex, while women need a long, exciting foreplay to get ready for action. Take the whole game as a very, very long foreplay. Even if a woman likes you and is ready to go straight into your bed, she still has to handle social restrictions programmed into her head from early childhood. It’s not just that she is weaker and you could easily be a stalker, but, if she left with you after your first sentence, her girlfriends would think she was a SLUT. You can still find one girl in every 50 who will leave with you after a direct and obvious opener, but you had better avoid those. You don’t want to lay a girl who’s with a new guy every night — at least if you want a girl and not a nympho.

What to say and how After all these no’s, let’s talk about the yeses. We know the club girl is approached many times and knows your intentions. This puts her in a position of power. Therefore, the solution is to show that you are a Man and be casually direct. You shouldn’t be overtly direct, and you shouldn’t try to hide your intentions. It’s exactly what she’s expecting. Tell her that you like her, but also show with your attitude that you are a Man who can handle her and walk away whenever he wants. This disarms her and puts YOU into the power position. Showing Manliness during an approach has two elements: what you say and how you say it. She will have formed an opinion about you in the first few seconds. Just as you can glance at a girl and decide whether you like her body or not, she needs only a few seconds of talking with you to get a first impression. And, in clubs, girls will judge you on first impressions. Up to this point, I’ve been talking a lot about the “how” part. You should go back to part 2, and reread it. Having the attitude of a Man is very important. No matter how good your approach is, if you can’t be consistent with it, she will eventually sense that you are just faking it and lose interest in you immediately. Reading about something won’t give you abilities, but the more you read it, the more familiar you will be with the concept. Then, when an actual situation arises, you’ll be able to remember what you’ve read and use it. It takes practice, but reading it again and again will give you encouragement and motivation.

Women loves talking, make sure you place your focus upon the questions you ask, and that they are a good conversation openers: 1. Subway/Train Station

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“Excuse me; do you know if the C line goes through here?” “Yes” “Thank You (Smile and look at her), are you from around here?” “No/Yes, I’m from __________” “Aw, Cool, I’m from _____________” (Watch her body language to see if she is interested in you) Keep talking, asking her questions about herself now, and not the bus/subway line, make sure you tell briefly about yourself as well. 2. Bar/Pub/Club Look around and see if you notice a lady sitting at the bar alone or with a female friend. “Hello, may I buy you a drink?” “Yes” When buying a drink, make sure to keep her attention at you, so that she will not get bored and you won’t lose your money and time Don’t try to be funny, but If you have the gift to make her laugh at that moment you’ve got her. “won’t your boyfriend be gallous if I’ll buy you another one?” 2. Library Having the ability to speak articulately regarding the book she’s reading is a big plus, of you don’t know a thing about it, first, when taking a seat, ask “do you mind if I sit here?”, while you read or pretend to read, check out her body language, if she remains apathetic, that means she don’t care much for you, and that you need to find the right time to squeeze a pick up line in, but if she get’s uncomfortable, if her toes suddenly point towards you, or if she begin playing with her hair, make sure to wait a second before asking here how’s her read 3. Dance School Here, your job is a lot easier, every woman can appreciate a guy who can dance, a good friend of mine pick up plenty of girls on the Salsa Dance Floor, after working out a good sweat in this sensual and erotic dance, make sure you invite her for a drink, ask her “Will your boyfriend be mad if I’ll ask you for a drink?” There is plenty of conversation topics if you just danced the most erotic dance in the dancing world. 4. Campus Its very easy to meet women who are in the same class as yourself, but if she’s not, you can always make a move on the grass, in the school’s library, gym or dining room. If you are in a course that interest you, you already have a conversation topic.

5. The Office These days, you must be careful – because you might have a sexual harassment case on your hands even if you never intended to offend anyone, take special interest in attractive coworkers, don’t show

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them that you are interested in them at the office, but learn about their private life when the opportunity presents itself, the great thing about the office is that you know that you will meet again tomorrow, and if your desk is right next to her’s that’s even better, trying to help her work will get you places. When you have selected your target, start by going straight up to her, whether she’s sitting at the bar, dancing on a table, talking to her friends or just standing somewhere. Look at her while approaching, whether she notices you and looks back or not. Don’t try to hide and approach from the side or from the rear. Take the shortest route possible, and go straight toward her. If there are people in the way, gently push them aside. Don’t let them distract you, and don’t start apologizing for pushing them away, because it can ruin your manly stance. Even if she is with her friends and not alone, always go straight up to your target girl and ignore the rest of the group. If they see that she likes you — which she will — they won’t block you. Make sure to SMILE upon approaching her and during the conversation. A smile is very disarming and makes her feel good. When you are standing in front of her, look into her eyes and talk to her. You can even check out her body in a visible way before delivering your line. Don’t forget, a Man will never apologize for his desires. When using one of the casually direct openers, be conscious of your body language and the tone of your voice. Speak in a low, calm voice. Pay attention to your inner state, and don’t deliver the line in a hurry. If she sees that you’re hesitating or being nervous, she will know that you’re just faking your Manliness and brush you off quickly. Act casually, as if talking to a girl is an everyday thing you do. Your inner state affects people around you. When you are feeling good and happy, people you talk to tend to adopt your happiness. This is the MOST important part: When you approach the girl, act as if you’ve found a long-lost friend or you’re meeting your true love whom you haven’t seen in a very long time. Smile and show her how happy you are to meet her. Even if you’re feeling down and low or you have no reason to be happy, try to get yourself into that state. Think of a good memory, and KNOW that something good is going to happen and is awaiting you. Even if your target girl is in a bad mood or acting bitchy with other guys, your magnetic presence will disarm her instantly. When you first begin talking to her, there’s no need to stand at a distance as if you’re afraid of her. Gentle human touch can add to the equation. You can stand next to her and gently touch her shoulders, her back or put your arms around her when delivering one of the lines. If the music is too loud, lean even closer and whisper in her ear. When she turns her head toward you, make sure you have a big smile on your face. If your target is moving in the club or coming toward you, stop her. Start moving toward her; make eye contact and say, “Stop.” — Don’t yell, because you will startle her. Say it in a gentle but confident way, and smile while saying it. If she doesn’t stop, you can put your hand out in front of you or gently grab her arm or shoulder, lean closer and whisper your line in her ear. The above description of Manly delivery holds true in this case as well. If she’s facing another direction when you’re approaching her and even after the opener, she is testing to see whether you’re consistent within your frame of the Man. If you stand there like an average chump, she’ll lose interest and ignore you. So gently grab her shoulders and turn her toward you. Smile while doing it.

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After your opener, the girl will usually smile and be happy, express surprise or might not know how to act. She might extend her hand to introduce herself. If that happens, shake her hand, and introduce yourself as well. Some girls will be embarrassed and won’t know how to act or what to say. It’s like a shock to them, and they don’t believe their own eyes. A real Man for her is like the hottest girl in the club coming up to you and offering to spend the night with you. You would probably be stunned and not know how to react or what to say for a few minutes. So, if that happens, break the ice by asking her a question or introducing yourself first. You can also give her a compliment right after the opener or later. If you do, don’t forget to compliment her personality, taste or her achievements and never her genetics. You can approach a girl with: “I like you. You have really nice earrings; they show wonderful taste.” You can also say: “You have beautiful, soft hair” or something to that effect. These are Manly compliments, which show that you are a real Man and that you can also care about her at the same time. During the conversation, ask questions about her and be totally casual. She will be a pleasant partner and answer your questions. You will notice that some of the hottest girls are empty and don’t know what to talk about. Again, the most important thing to remember is to stay consistent with your approach and Manly frame during the pickup and also on your dates. If she senses that you’re faking it, she will leave you. Often a girl’s female or male friends will become jealous and try to prevent you from talking to her. In this case, you will have to isolate her. When you feel that the conversation is going well, grab her arm or her hand and say: “Let’s go somewhere quieter!” Then lead her to another side of the club. The best option is a table or some other place where the music is not too loud and you can sit and talk without being interrupted. I am a businessman in heart, and one day while watching the show “The Apprentice” with Donald Trump, his son Don Jr. said something that I never forgot, it seem simplistic, but this simple phrase changed the way I think about women “You never get what you don’t ask for”, it proved itself as being very true. If she’s worried about losing track of her friends or afraid they might leave her, tell her that you will go with her and find them later. If you can’t stop her, grab her hand and lead her to find her friends. It’s important not to let her lead you; you should be the one searching while bringing her around. If you don’t know what her friends look like, tell her to alert you if she sees them. Hot girls are very flaky, and since they are usually spoiled and given everything because of their looks, they find it hard to take on responsibilities. The hotter they are, the truer this is. She might have to leave you to go to the restroom or catch her friends. If this happens, no matter if she promises to come back or you were in a wonderful conversation, she will probably stay with her friends. In this case, find her, smile and continue talking where you left off; After the conversation, when the time is right, kiss her or get her number. If the situation allows it, go as far as she lets you. You can read more about this in the next chapter. Never hesitate if you feel that the moment has come to act. Too much hesitation is inconsistent with your initial Manly frame, and if she senses it, she will leave you quickly.

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Some clubs consist of one big dance floor with really loud music and not too many places to talk. I usually avoid these, but there might be times when there is no other place to go. You could learn a few dance moves and try them on girls, but unless you are good-looking, it won’t be effective. Also, many of the girls on the dance floor take drugs, and trying to pick up such girls is usually pointless. They are easy and may give you their number, but they will behave totally differently the next day. They are just there to have fun, and while they’re high, they don’t seriously consider anything that happens. Also note: Laying drugged/drunken women is against the law in many countries, including the United States. So, to summarize, if you’re in a loud club, learn to raise your voice, speak louder and approach the same way as you normally would. You can also try to isolate girls from their group or surroundings quickly and find a quieter place in the club to talk. After your opener, gently grab her hand and say: “Let’s go somewhere quieter.” Note: The concept and openers above are based on the method developed by Ranko Magami. You can visit his website at www.attractanddate.com.

Getting A Phone Number What's the best way to get a woman's phone number? Here's the best way: "I'd like to take you out sometime, can I have your phone number?" One great trick I learnt is to ask for her e-mail address/Skype no. as well. This way, you imply that your hip 'because your connected to the net. Don't try to pretend you have a photographic memory. This brain of ours has a habit of crashing at the most importune moments. I only wrote a separate section on this, because many guys tend to overrate this phase. Getting her number is easy once she is ATTRACTED to you. Just say: “I want to meet you later. Give me your phone number.” Have your mobile or a piece of paper and a pen at hand and have her write it for you. After getting her number, kiss her goodbye and leave. If she doesn’t want to give you her number, but offers to take yours and call you, don’t accept it. Never give her your number without getting hers. It’s a sign that she’s not interested, and accepting it would show that she disrespects you. Tell her: “Look, I won’t give my number to you without getting yours, since I know you won’t call. I want to meet you, but I’m not into playing silly games. Either give me your number now, or I will leave, and we’re never going to see each other again.” If she still won’t give you her number, it means you’ve probably done something wrong. (Hint: You weren’t Man enough for her.) At this point, there’s not much left for you to do.

Other venues

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Apart from clubs, there are many other places to meet girls. These include shopping malls, university campuses, the street and other venues I have already mentioned. The difference is that at most of these places, women don’t expect to be approached, and they are in a different mood. Usually, just by going up to them, you will create a large amount of attraction. But always be careful not to come off as threatening. Yelling “Stop!” at a girl on the street with a serious expression on your face might not be the best way to approach her. I wouldn’t recommend touching her either: Imagine being a woman, and some stranger on the street suddenly puts his hands on your shoulders. Just choose the girl you want to approach: on the street, in a shopping mall or anywhere else. Try to make eye contact with her. Whether she looks back at you or not, smile, then go straight up to her. Don’t approach her from behind or from the side. Your goal is not to scare her to death, but to talk to her. When you’re in front of her, raise your hand gently and say, “Stop,” while still smiling and looking in her eyes. If she is located elsewhere, like sitting on a bench, sit next to her. Your state should be the same as when approaching a girl in a club. Be happy about meeting her and show it. You can use one of the “I like you” lines: “Hi! I like you. You have a beautiful smile.” After she recovers from her surprise and you talk a bit, you can offer to take her to a nearby café if she’s not in a hurry. Shopping malls are ideal for this, because there are usually several restaurants and cafés inside. If she has to leave, just say: “I see you’re in a hurry, but I want to meet you later and get to know you better. Let’s exchange numbers, and we can meet in a café to talk later.” Then take her number. If both of you have some spare time, it’s not a bad idea to stay together and switch venues. For example, if you meet at the shopping mall, sit and talk in a café for an hour or two; then you can take her for a walk at the nearby park and kiss her. The more time you spend with her and the more places you visit together, the closer she will feel to you, as if she’s known you for some time. Try it. And, by the way, you can do the same thing when picking her up in a club: Just extract her from the club; then visit a restaurant or another place as if you were already a couple. Another way to meet girls is in your own social circle, that is, your friends and the people they introduce you to. Visiting a house party organized by your buddies, or going out together is the easiest way to pick up a girl in your circle of friends. Just make sure when you are new in a group that you don’t fight for attention or try to be the center by being loud. Lay back and watch the dynamics going on in the conversation. There is no need to use any specific opener; just approach the girl you want when the time is right, and talk to her. A word of warning: If it’s more of a closed circle, think twice before trying to pick up a girl. Don’t shit where you eat; see if it’s worth it. Consider that you will probably lose your chances with other girls in the same group. And, if she’s the only girl that eight guys are trying to pick up, you will have to choose a different technique. Just lay back and ignore her. Your ignoring her will start to bother her after some time, and she’ll probably initiate a conversation with you. Note that this only works if she has already acknowledged your presence.

When a girl wants to be approached

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Whether you notice it or not, during your everyday life, girls send signals about their interest or disinterest in you. Just as you see a hot female and feast your eyes on her body, girls measure you in the same way. Of course, most of these girls might not fully meet your standards, but you’ll be sure to find that some of them are fairly hot. I’ll mention a few of the signs of interest below and will discuss them in depth later. When a girl walks in front of you and looks into your eyes or even smiles, that’s a sign of interest. When you’re on a bus and you notice that a certain girl maintains her proximity even if you sit or stand somewhere else, that’s another sign. Maybe while you’re reading a book, you notice with your peripheral sight that she’s looking at you occasionally. Or when you sit next to her on a bus, she fixes her hair or tries to do something to get your attention. Some of these signs may be subconscious, but most of them are done consciously. Wherever you are on the street — traveling on the subway or sitting in a café — if you see a girl that you like showing signs of interest in you, you SHOULD approach her. If you’re pressed for time or are in a situation where one of you is in a hurry, there is a nice line I like to use. She is rarely approached with such, and it displays a great deal of Manliness. Upon approaching, tell her: “Hi. You look like somebody I should get to know, but I’m in a hurry right now. Still, I don’t want to pass up such a wonderful opportunity to meet someone like you. I’d like to see you again at a place where we can talk and get to know each other.” While delivering it, make sure that you come off as nonthreatening. Keep a big smile on your face at all times. You are not a stalker; your goal is to get to know her better. If she agrees (and she no doubt will if she has already shown signs of interest in you), ask her to exchange numbers with you. Then smile, and carry on with whatever you were doing. This can be a lot more spectacular in a club where girls go to get guys. Even an average- looking guy gets at least four or five invitations for an approach during a night in a crowded club (although most of them don’t notice it). Usually, you can approach her with one of the “I like you” openers. If you’re leaving or don’t have time to talk, the line from the preceding paragraph can be pulled off very nicely. I’ve been in many situations when I was about to leave a club in the morning and noticed a girl trying to catch my eye. When this happens, I go up to her and ask for her number. Then she smiles, and that’s it. I end up dating her. If you have no experience at reading female signs, learning to recognize them will be harder at first. Pay attention to how people behave in your everyday life, and watch the signs that women give you and other guys using body language. Just by observing certain social situations at your office or in a crowded club, you can learn a lot! Generally, if a woman walks near you and looks into your eyes while smiling, or looks down childishly, she’s likely to be interested in you. Some women might not be comfortable looking into your eyes or showing their interest overtly; that’s why it’s important to “feel” the situation. These feelings will come with experience. If she looks away or looks up, she’s probably either neutral or disinterested. But even then, you can approach her with what you have learned in previous chapters. For more information regarding female sexuality body language and how to know if she’s interested, read our book Sexual Body Language, which can be found here: www.librarytales.com

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There are also ways to measure how interested she is in you. I have met girls who eyed a guy for a whole night till he got the courage to approach them. Then again, some girls will only give you a slight glance from which you have to decide. Either way, even if you are not sure about her initial interest, approach her. Listen, my friend, if you base your approaches JUST on signs of interest that women show you, you’ll see that your success skyrockets quickly. BUT it’s also easy to fall into the TRAP of laziness or shyness and use this as an excuse for not making cold approaches. Please, don’t do that. These invitations usually guarantee success, and being able to use this is a nice tool to have in your arsenal. The hottest women will very rarely give you such signs, and you will have to cold-approach them. So be the Man, use what you’ve learned, and be ready to approach a woman at any time without excuses, not just when you’re invited.

Meeting Online To be honest, I have never met any model-quality girls on the Internet. Whether you will or not depends on your geographical location. In some of the bigger cities, girls extensively use the Internet. In my area, I have only encountered two types of sites: those with little schoolgirls around 14 years old and those with women over 28. What I’ve been missing are hot girls between 20 and 25. But, if you go out regularly and still have time on your hands for surfing the Internet, you should try it out on your own. It’s good for practicing your Manly attitude. Here are a few guidelines you can follow if you decide to try Internet dating:

Online personals: 1. I don’t recommend using commercial services. Try a free one and, if it works for you, consider paying for it. Otherwise, it would just be a waste of money. 2. If a girl is hot enough and has her photo up, she’ll get 50 e-mails a day from the creation of her account. Even if she checks it often, she will become bored by the losers after a few days or weeks. So be fast when a new girl shows up online, and write to her instantly. 3. Some guys set up fake accounts. They create profiles of hot girls for fun to see how many and what kinds of e-mails other guys are sending. This is lame and messes up the whole Internet dating scene. So take care when you see a girl who looks too hot to be true; it could be a picture of a porn star with a “funny” guy behind the whole thing. 4. Another story: There’s an urban legend circulating in my city: A guy logged on to an Internet dating site as a hot woman and started e-mailing a lot of guys at the same time. “She” agreed to make a date with several of them. They set up a time, and each guy had to have a red rose in his hand so the “girl” would recognize him. That day, according to newspapers, there was a big fight in the crowd at one of the biggest shopping malls, when 15 guys arrived in front of the same cinema — holding red roses in their hands. 5. Make sure you have a lot of free time. You’ll have to check the new profiles and your messages every day, and it can take weeks to get a girl to meet you using the Net.

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6. Your profile is very important. Although girls get enough messages so they don’t have to search for guys’ profiles, when you send a message, they will take a look at yours. You should have something in your profile to separate yourself from the crowd. First, be sure to have a picture of yourself. Many women who get 50 new messages a day won’t look at your profile if they see you have no pics uploaded. I don’t suggest the use of half-naked pictures and such. Young girls around 14 will love it, but perhaps that’s not what you want?! The best would be something creative or extraordinary: you with your dog, you skiing or you hugging or riding a dolphin during your last vacation. Here is an example of some text for your profile: “What is a real man like? Confident? Knows how to lead? You feel safe with him? He has a sense of humor? He is kind and caring? A true gentleman? E-mail me and we’ll see.” 7. Many personal services offer an option to notify you of newcomers. Take a look at the new photos daily, and e-mail these girls as quickly as possible. I don’t advise e-mailing those who don’t have their profile pics up. You don’t know whom you’re dealing with, and there are many girls with pics you can choose from. 8. The number of responses you get depends on the number of girls you write to and the quality of your profile/messages. Have a well-written template message ready that you can modify slightly and send to all the girls. Don’t expect every girl to respond. Some of them will have full mailboxes, some of them won’t have time to read your message, some of them won’t be interested, and some of them will be fake accounts. A good message can increase your success though. Following is an example: “Hi, Amy! If your picture is real, then I like you. You look like someone I should get to know. I’m not the type of guy who is into playing games. I know what I want, and I’m not afraid to take it. If you think you can handle a challenge and you’re ready for an adventure, e-mail me to begin. Richard” 9. Try to meet her in person as soon as possible, and don’t waste too much time on any one girl. Have multiple girls on the go. Most of them won’t take it seriously anyway. 10. There are online communities that you can use for meeting women. One of them is friendster, for example. Some of these services aren’t specifically designed for online dating, but I have a friend who has a unique style and has a lot of success with friendster chicks.

Chat rooms: 1. Chat rooms are another way to meet girls. It’s a little bit more personal, and it might be

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easier to seduce somebody this way, but it’ll also take a lot of time. Find some general-talk chat rooms, which are more popular, and search for girls. 2. Go private as soon as you can, and always do simultaneous chats with multiple girls. 3. Try to get her photo as soon as possible. Unlike personal ads, if she doesn’t have a photo up, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s ugly. Unfortunately, you can only find out how she really looks on a date. Never listen to what she says about herself; she can easily be lying. The only way to judge her looks might be from her self-esteem. If she is confident and seems to have high self-esteem, she might not be that bad-looking. You can also ask how social she is, whether she goes out or not, has a lots of friends, etc. These are just guidelines. 4. During the chat, it’s just as important to separate yourself from the other guys as anywhere else. Don’t show excessive interest in her. Don’t hit on her. Lay back, and be the Man. If things are going well, ask for her number. If she won’t give it to you, try getting her e-mail address first. 5. I have a friend who was a total newbie with girls and started chatting. He was too lazy to go out. Still, he put a lot of time and effort into online chatting. Within a year, he was able to have sex with two girls he had met on the Net plus a bunch of kisses and dates with others. That’s not a very high success rate. And to meet a girl will require e-mailing back and forth for weeks, having to beg for her picture and so on. Even if you have multiple girls on the go, it’s just too much of a hassle. You can achieve the same results by going to a club on an average Saturday night without having to spend lonely nights in front of your computer. It’s up to you.

From Date To Sex Always call a girl on her mobile if she has one, so you can call her whenever you want. But don’t be too eager, and don’t pick up the phone five minutes after you get her number. There’s also no need to play games and wait two or three days before calling — unless you’re too busy, of course. When she answers the phone, just say: “Hi, it’s Rick. I was just thinking about you and thought I’d give a call to hear your cute smile.” You don’t need to give her a compliment, but it makes her feel good, so why not? Don’t start explaining anything like: “Hi, it’s Rick. Remember, we met yesterday at the Club Habana … blah blah.” A real Man doesn’t do that. If she doesn’t remember you by name and asks who you are, maintain an awkward silence for a few seconds; then tell her.

On the phone, you should be short and to the point. No need to seduce her or talk for hours. Ask what’s up and how she is. Then tell her that you want to meet. Be confident, and keep your strong frame: “I want to meet you. Let’s get together tomorrow at 3 p.m. in the park.” If

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she’s busy, ask her to list when she’s free, and choose a date that’s good for both of you. Never modify your program for a girl, and even if you make a mistake and do so, never tell her about it. After hanging up, don’t call her till the date. It’s usually best to leave just a day or two between the phone call and the meeting. If you couldn’t set up a time to get together, call her a few days later. If you want, you can send her short text messages between phone calls. If she doesn’t answer the phone, ring back a few minutes later. Never call more than two times in a row. Give her some time, and don’t force anything. If you get her answering machine or voice-messaging service, just say: “Hey, it’s me. I was thinking about you, so I called. I can still see your cute smile. I want to meet you tomorrow, and I have a nice idea. Bye!” Don’t tell her what the nice idea is. Keep her guessing and on her toes. Girls love the feeling of anticipation. She will either call back, or you can call her the next day. Don’t force a meeting if she’s not free. Agree on a different time. It sometimes happens that a girl doesn’t make your date or cancels it a few hours, or even minutes, before. There’s no universal solution for this. It probably means that you went wrong somewhere and weren’t Man enough for her. She may have problems in her life, or she could just be having a bad day. If the attraction isn’t big enough, it can happen. Women will usually come up with some bullshit on why they can’t meet you. Some of this is true, but most of it is stupid excuses. You can either move on or be persistent till she meets you. Don’t be her little puppy, and don’t cling to her. Live your life, have more girls on the go, and have OPTIONS, remember? No need to force anything, but you can be persistent if you want. She will give in sooner or later, or you will decide to move on.

Where to go on your date After doing your job on the phone, it’s time for the first date with the girl. Remember, it’s always the man who arranges everything, whether you sit in a café or go to the mountains. You don’t have to tell her what you’re going to do; women love surprises. A little warning though: If you know she will probably come in her high heels, either don’t take her rock climbing, or tell her to bring climbing shoes beforehand. She will love you for that later. It’s a sign that you’re not a total jerk and that you care for her. Always have a plan, especially when going out with a girl for the first time. The most important things are knowing where to take her, knowing what to talk about and knowing how and when to advance physically. It’s all about L-E-A-D-I-N-G. In this chapter, I’ll mostly be discussing where to take her; the rest will come later. I personally don’t prefer going to the movies or the theater on the first date. Your goal for now is to talk and get to know each other better. Nor do I recommend restaurants. And never, ever take her to a club on a first date. Clubs are for singles or couples who are already dating; guys hitting on your girl in a distracting environment could ruin your relationship before it even begins. Apart from the above, you have many options. If it’s cold outside, just sit in a comfortable café or tearoom. It should be a friendly environment that isn’t too loud and where you can sit next to her. If you

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live in a warm climate or if it’s summer, the best thing to do is to take her somewhere outdoors and have an enjoyable activity together. I need to stress the importance of knowing your city. So KNOW YOUR CITY. Know the monuments, romantic places, parks, amusement parks and the types of activities you can do with a girl. There is probably some city-guide paper that you can get your hands on to find out where the most romantic places are. Or ask one of your friend girls to show you around. Your date will love it when you take her to a place where she’s never been or didn’t even know about. Here are a few ideas to consider: Take a drive down to the beach and walk and talk. It cost virtually nothing and is a wonderful way to get to know the other person. Besides that, if you can catch the setting sun, it makes a pretty romantic setting for the date. Go to mini golf. The beauty of mini golf is there will be a lot of other couples around as well and families, so it makes for a comfortable setting. Golfing is a leisurely sport so there's plenty of time for interaction between the two of you. Take your date to a play if she has a flare for arts. If you've been friends person for a while, you'll know what he or she likes and you can choose the type of play she'd enjoy. If she's a music lover, surprise her by taking her to a concert by her favourite artiste. It's an excellent way to bond and see her enjoying herself. Pack a picnic basket and take your date for a picnic by the water or in a park. Bring some finger food and a blanket for you to sit on. Make sure there are plenty of rest rooms and shelter around just in case. Go go-karting. This is a great way to find out if your date is adventurous!

Take a limo ride around the city. To get the best deals, use the Internet to find local companies with websites. Go to a roof top or a revolving restaurant. Eating outdoors always makes things more memorable, just remember to make a reservation first. Go to a day spa together and get a massage. Go on the Internet to find the best deals. Go hot air ballooning. Probably not the ideal first date as its a little expensive and hot air ballooning has to be done very early in the morning. Go on a lunch date. Perfect idea if you work together, just make sure your date knows it's a date and not a friendly outing. Go to the local museum. The most popular types of museums are the interactive types, with displays, not things like art galleries. If your date is the sporting type, take her to a local sporting event. You could even go to a college game. If you know how to ride a motorbike, take your date for a ride somewhere scenic or at night time in the city.

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Frisbee golf is another date idea that will certainly tell you what type of person you are dating. If you are not sure what frisbee golf is, go to Google and look it up, it's a lot of fun. Go to your local jazz club and relax. Everyone loves jazz. Go to the zoo. Most zoos's have night time exhibits or exhibits out of the norm for people to see. Go to the local fair. Every year we have a local fair where I live that has show bags, rides etc. Getting up early and going to the flea markets is a very cheap and fun date. If you are not big on sitting down and talking, this is the date for you. Take your date for dinner on the boardwalk. Very romantic!

Outdoor dates: 1. Parks where you can have a walk and chill together. Sit on benches where couples are kissing nearby, look at the flowers, walk under the trees, play games or have a picnic. Possibilities are endless. 2. Castles, ancient ruins or monuments. Anything you can climb that is somewhat of an adventure. If there is a long-abandoned ruin or castle in your city, take her there. It’s going to be a lot of fun for her. Make sure that if she is frightened, you are nearby to comfort and hug her. 3. Lookout towers or places with a good view. Put your arms around her while looking down on the city. If it’s located at some distance from the parking lot, take your time getting there, and enjoy a leisurely, romantic walk together. 4. Go to an amusement park, a zoo or a dolphinarium/aquarium. 5. Caves. If you have caves in the city or nearby, take her there on an arranged tour. 6. Rock or wall climbing. It’s a good, exciting date if you know how to do it, even if you’re just a little more experienced than she is. 7. Go skating or visit the ice-skating rink during winter. 8. Swimming pool. Go to the swimming pool or the local beach together. Swim and sunbathe; then have a cold drink at a nearby café. 9. Go on an outing to a nearby forest, state or national park, or some other interesting place. Visit a fountain, a lookout tower or a local monument. 10. Go-cart racing or bobsledding. 11. An excursion on a boat or Jet Skiing on the local river/lake.

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Indoor dates: 1. Bowling. Give her a soaking at the bowling alley. You can keep teasing her if it’s her first time bowling. 2. Snooker or billiards. Only if you know how to play though. 3. Shopping. Take her to the nearest shopping mall. Sit in a café; then walk around together. Go to a few stores, and shop for clothes for yourself. Ask her how the clothes look on you. Go to the bookstore, and have fun while looking at the sex or love advice books with her. 4. Play squash or tennis; then have a drink together. 5. Museums and art galleries. 6. Exhibitions or statue parks (sculpture gardens). Here’s an example of a unique place in my own city. I’m sure you can find something cool in yours as well — just open your eyes and look around. We have a short tunnel here that leads through a small hill to a bridge that crosses the river. The bridge is illuminated at night, and there is a calm, hidden place at the top of the tunnel, from which the view of the bridge and the whole city is beautiful, especially at night. I might take her to a nearby café, then have a walk together and arrive at the top of the tunnel as a surprise. It’s an ideal place for a first kiss and to complete a wonderful date. Use your imagination, and come up with new ideas to suit your needs. Do whatever you can in YOUR city. Although not all the places mentioned in the lists above are good for a first date, they contain many good suggestions that can keep you and your girl entertained for a while. The best dates are cheap, low-cost dates. I never take a girl somewhere expensive for the first date. You can do that later as a reward or gift to enhance your relationship. And remember what I’ve said about money: Be careful with gold diggers! As I mentioned previously, knowing where to take her is necessary, but not enough on its own. You should also know where you are going conversationally and physically. In the next two chapters, I’ll give you some examples of topics to talk about on your dates. When I talk about the physical aspects of a date, I mean that whenever you’re on a first date, you should have a goal in mind. That goal is to kiss her by the end of the date. You’re soon going to learn some techniques and ideas for achieving this as well. Carry on!

What to talk about Talking to women is a little bit different from talking to your buddies. To get good at it, you’ll have to work on your skills by practicing, just as you did when you learned to ride your bike.

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With girls, there are times when you just click, and communication is flawless between the two of you. You don’t have to think about what to say next, and you’re caught up in a nice conversation. On the other hand, there are times when you encounter awful silences and don’t know what to say. When this happens, it’s not bad to have some prepared topics in your arsenal to spice up the conversation a little. What’s the purpose of communication between the two of you after all? The main purpose is to get to know each other better. To get a rough impression of each other’s personality and view of the world. To see if you click and get on well. Apart from this, women will always ask themselves about their feelings or the way they feel about you after talking to you. Thus, for you, communication will also be a tool to evoke certain emotions in her. Let’s talk about these. Before anything can happen, she has to like you. If you are a Man, she will see it in the first few seconds and be attracted to you. When that happens, she will be interested in talking to you or going on a date. After the initial attraction, there are certain phases that each male-female interaction goes through. You can speed up the process, but you can’t skip any phases. Here is a way to categorize it, which I call the phases of initial conversation (you could categorize it in many other ways, of course): 1. The first step is to loosen up a little in each other’s company. You can talk about totally superficial topics; it doesn’t really matter. People need time to let themselves relax a little bit, to get accustomed to the environment and the other person, especially on a date. 2. When you’re loosened up, the next step is to achieve rapport with each other. Finding commonalities, common interests and a point where the two of you can connect is necessary. 3. When you have found common interests, you can work on establishing comfort and trust. A woman needs to know that she can trust you before giving her body to you. She needs to know that you won’t harm her physically or leave her after having sex. For ages, women who lost their virginity before marriage were labeled sluts and driven to the edges of society. Today, it’s a lot better, but girls still have to consider how their friends will react. Society still puts a lot of pressure on them. That’s why this phase is so important. 4. And the fourth step is her arousal. The first three phases will somewhat guarantee that during the process of arousal, social conditioning won’t kick in. Before you kiss her or have sex with her, you need to go through these steps in order. Each point given above is in a cause-and-effect relationship with the next one. In order to have sex with her, you need to arouse her. You can easily arouse her, but to prevent social conditioning from kicking in, she will need to trust you. But trust comes only after rapport, and rapport comes after loosening up. See? It’s like building a house. If you skip the foundation or just one step, your house will soon collapse. Going through all four phases is necessary. Before I give you some examples regarding the list above, let me tell you what to avoid talking about. I generally don’t talk about religion, politics or work/school when getting to know a woman for the first time. Religion and politics are taboo, and some people have such strong views that it might fuck up an otherwise good date. Save that for the relationship; you’ll have time to debate your views later. Even if you’re sure that your views match, it’s not

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a good idea to talk about such serious topics on the first date. The topics of work and school are simply boring. Your first date together shouldn’t seem like a job interview. A typical example: 1. Where do you work? 2. Oh, and what was your previous job? 3. Which school do/did you go to? 4. Where do you live? 5. Do you have any sisters? 6. How old is your little brother? 7. You have a dog? Sound familiar? AVOID using these and similar questions as the center of your conversation with the girl. When she comes home from work and goes on a date, she might want to let her hair down a little. You don’t want to bore each other with such topics. Many guys have already asked her these questions anyway, and you should try to be different from the rest. Now that you know what you shouldn’t talk about, let’s examine each step of the phases of initial conversation in more detail:

1. To loosen up, there’s no need to ask serious questions. A little chitchat will do the job. Examples: (Note: These are only examples. It isn’t necessary to follow this list from point to point in your conversations; they’re just to give you ideas if you don’t know what to talk about.)

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News and gossip involving celebrities, drama, trends, fashion. Talking about the latest breakup of Britney Spears, the fashion style of stars, etc. Ask her what she thinks about the world of celebrities, whether she is attracted or repulsed by it.

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2. Her favorite films and why she likes them. Has she seen your favorite film or not? Is she into the kinds of films you like or not?

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3. Her favorite actor, actress/pop star/film star. Has she ever fantasized about becoming a celebrity? Does that shining, glamorous world attract her? Would she date a famous person, or would she rather be with a better, but lesser-known guy.

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4. Music. What music does she like? Has her musical taste changed since her teenage years? Does she prefer classical music or rock/electronic genres? Does she go to concerts? How far would she go to see her favorite band? Does she like clubs and, if so, what type?

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5. Her hobbies: Does she like reading or going to the theater or exhibitions. Does she prefer playing sports or another activity? Does she dance? If so, what types of dancing does she do? Has she participated in competitive sports? What sports does she like?

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6. Animals: What is her favorite animal? Does she prefer dogs or cats? What does she think of vegetarianism and animal rights? Has she ever tried horseback riding or seen a real dolphin?

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7. Ask her where she would go if she could visit any place in the world.

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8. What is the strangest thing that she has ever done or the strangest thing that has happened to her?

2. You can also tell some entertaining stories from your life. The direction of the conversation will depend on the type of woman you are dealing with. Popping up different topics will show you her general interests and give you a picture of the kind of person she is. 

When you’re into talking, you can go into deeper topics and ask her about herself and

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her personality: 

Relatives and friends. Is she an only child, or does she have sisters or brothers? If she could choose, would she choose differently? Did she have a lot of friends in high school? How many friends does she have these days? Is friendship important to her, and is she good at keeping in touch with friends and relatives?

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Goals and aspirations. What did she want to be when she was a little girl? Has she achieved what she wanted, does she still want to, or has she changed her goals? What are her current short-term goals; what does she think she’ll be doing in five to 20 years, and what does she want to do? Ask if she is satisfied with her job/school or if she wants more.

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Passion and satisfaction. Does she have an activity or hobby that she pursues with great passion and enjoyment? Is there a special place where she relaxes or where she enjoys being? What does she do to loosen up and free herself from stress and worries? What’s the most challenging and satisfying thing in her job/area in which she studies?

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Traveling and vacations. Talk about places and countries where you and she have been; share your memories of what you both enjoyed the most. If you’ve been to the same place, compare notes. Ask her about the best vacation of her life and why she liked it so much.

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What’s the first memory that pops into her mind from that vacation? Is there a country, city or culture that fascinates her? Has she ever considered moving to another city, country or part of the world? If she had to live in another part of the world, where would it be and why?

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Male-female relationships. Who lies and cheats more: women or men? Does she think men understand what women really want? Are males and females switching roles in today’s society? Tell her your view on this topic, and tell her what being a Man means to you.

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Ask her about herself: How does she know when a man is interested in her? What’s the thing that men usually find the most attractive about her? Is she satisfied with herself, both her personality and looks, or is there something she would change?

3. Going even deeper and sharing memories that evoke feelings of comfort and safety can establish a certain amount of trust:

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Her youth and childhood. What was her favorite toy? Did she play with dolls, or was she the girl who played with the boys? Was she a good or a bad kid? Did she have good grades? When did she have her first drink, and was there anything outrageous that she did at school?

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Ask her about her best memory from when she was a little girl, maybe a place where she really liked to be, something that gave her comfort and shelter, where she felt safe far from the noise of the world. Let her describe what it was like and how she felt in those moments. Ask her if there is something now that makes her feel the same way.

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Talk about her friends. How would her friends describe her behind her back? Has she ever been very disappointed because of a friend betraying her? Does she believe in true friendship, and are there many people whom she would consider to be “real” friends?

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If she could go back in time and change something in her life, what would she do differently? If she could change only one thing, what it would be?

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Talk about love and whether she has ever been in love; if so, how many times? What’s the most surprising thing that she did or would do for love? Does she believe in love at first sight, and does she think that true love exists? Is she lonely sometimes? Wouldn’t she love to have somebody to hug at these times?

At this point, she should be ready for the fourth step — arousal — which I’ll discuss in the next chapter.

Sex and critical topics After she is loosened up in your company and you have a comfortable amount of rapport, trust and comfort with her, you can shift the conversation toward a more sexual orientation so she will be ready for the first kiss. The topic of sex is something you can never be direct about. You can’t ask a girl: “Do you want to have sex with me?” even if you think she does. What you can do is to arouse her with words by talking about sexual experiences and themes to evoke such feelings in her; then slowly advance physically till she is ready and wanting sex herself. There is a game that I really like. It’s sort of an icebreaker for the first date. It gives a frame for both of you to ask questions that you wouldn’t normally ask on a first date and brings up the topic of sex. It’s called the “questions game.” Use it when you’re deep into the conversation, and both of you are enjoying each other’s company. Don’t take it seriously; it only works if you do it in a funny and entertaining way. This is not a game to play when things are awkward. Only bring it up if both of you are LOOSENED UP and FEELING GOOD.

Tell her you know a funny and entertaining game you want to show her. Tell her it has these rules: You ask questions of each other, one at a time, taking turns. You have to ask questions that let the cat out of the bag. “How old are you?” is not allowed. “How many boyfriends

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have you had?” is OK. The same question can’t be asked twice. And the last rule: She goes first. Of course, she won’t be able to ask anything and will pass the ball to your court. Here are a few questions you can ask. Notice how they lead her in a sexual direction:

1. Questions about previous relationships — good for a start: 1. How many boyfriends have you had? 2. When did you have your first boyfriend? 3. When did you break up with your last boyfriend? 4. What did you like the most, and what did you hate the most in him? 5. What was missing in your relationship with your last boyfriend? 6. What was missing in your relationships with your boyfriends up to now? 7. Do you prefer passion, adventure and excitement, or are you more of a romantic person? 8. Have you ever been in love? 9. Which one of your boyfriends did you love the most? 10. What was the most wonderful place where you spent time with him? 11. With your future boyfriend, what would be the most wonderful place to spend time? 12. What’s the craziest thing you’ve done in a relationship or for love?

2. Questions about kissing — will make her think about the topic: 13. When did you last kiss a guy? 14. When did you have your very first kiss? 15. When did you have the first kiss that you really enjoyed? Describe what it was like. 16. Have you ever kissed a guy on a first date? How did it happen? 17. Describe your perfect kiss — what it’s like! 18. What was the most exciting thing you did when playing “truth or dare”? 19. If you had to choose between sex and friendship in a relationship with a guy, which one would you choose?

3. Questions about sex — ideal for arousing her and making her think about the topic; ask them only if she seems comfortable with it: 20. Have you ever had a one-night stand?

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21. Have you ever had sex on the first date? 22. How often do you have sex when you are in a relationship? 23. Where’s the most bizarre place you ever had sex? 24. Have you ever had sex in public? 25. What’s your favorite position? 26. When did you have sex for the first time? 27. Have you ever had a threesome with another girl or guy? 28. Would you try it? 29. What’s the most extreme thing you’ve done while having sex? 30. What was missing in your sex life up to now? 31. Do you masturbate? How often? 32. Describe what perfect sex is like for you. I can’t stress enough to gauge her reactions and calibrate. If she’s not comfortable with the more sexual topics, don’t force it. It will vary from girl to girl. If she’s a virgin, she might blush when you ask some of the preceding questions. If she seems uncomfortable, change the topic. Ask something that’s less piquant, or forget the whole game. The game is also wonderful for gauging what kind of a girl she is. After playing it, you will be able to decide whether she is a more romantic or down-to-earth person, whether she takes sex as an everyday thing or she is more of a conservative type, etc. With this information, you can tailor your style to her personality. If she is a sexual girl, she will be more open to advancing physically and maybe having sex on the first date. If she is the romantic type, you can take your time and let her become more comfortable in your company by waiting for a few more dates. If things are going well during the game, pay attention to the signals she is sending via her body language. She might be ready to be kissed after some of the more sexual questions or even just the topic of kissing. Watch for the peak point in your conversation, when her pupils dilate and her breathing quickens. That’s the point to go in for the kiss. See the following chapters for more info on these signs and how to kiss her.

How to read a women Normally, there is a special dynamic operating in male-female relationships. While females tend to adopt a passive, receptive demeanor, males are more active and initiative. A typical example at a club is: Girls expect to be approached, while guys are expected to approach girls. A girl can do two things to improve her success: She can look her best, dress in high heels, push-up bras, etc., and she can also give inviting signs for a guy to approach her. A guy will be more likely to approach a girl who looks good in his eyes, but he will also go for a less hot one if she shows signs of interest and he sees the green light.

Thus, in a typical male-female interaction, the female will signal with her body language and behavior that she is ready to proceed, while the male will respond to her signs, calibrate and advance accordingly. He will have to go through the steps and initiate, as she expects him to. Once again, this is about leading. No matter how good a conversationalist you are and no

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matter how attracted to you she is, you will always have to be the one initiating. Some aggressive and horny women will do it for you, but that’s the exception and not the rule. There are two kinds of female signals: conscious and subconscious ones. A girl will give conscious signals when she wants you to make your move. Subconscious signals are subtler and will be an automatic response to her feeling good in your company. It is very important to learn these signs. I’m sure you’ve laughed just as many times as I have at the typical scene in Hollywood movies: The girl is attracted to a guy; the guy is attracted to the girl, but the guy doesn’t recognize the signs of interest she’s sending him, which leads to a great deal of farce. Just by learning to recognize the signs women are sending, you will improve your success exponentially. In a club or in typical everyday situations, there will always be a few girls around you showing signs of interest and inviting you to approach them using body language. If you recognize these girls and make your move, you will be likely to succeed. You will see that sometimes certain signs can be misleading, and it’s necessary to develop your intuition for such situations. For example, a waitress has to smile at everyone to get tips, and by accident, she could mislead you into thinking that she’s attracted to you. To avoid this, you will need to fine-tune your intuition with experience and learn to “feel” whether she is really attracted to you or not. A professional table tennis player doesn’t see the ball. He feels it. His hands move automatically while he is in a trance. A lot of practice will make you better at “feeling” the signs that women are giving, just as the table tennis player does with the ball. So let’s look at the most general conscious and subconscious signs that show she is attracted to you: 1. She’s relaxed while sitting or standing and talking with you. Her arms are open and not closed; her legs are either wide apart or crossed with her feet pointing toward you. 2. She’s comfortable in your company. When you lean closer to her, she stays in the same position and doesn’t pull away. 3. She leans closer while talking with you or sits closer when you’re sitting next to each other. 4. She smiles a lot, even laughing at your lamest jokes, or she compliments you on something unremarkable. 5. She touches you sometimes on your arms or shoulder when talking with you. 6. She fixes her clothes, applies more makeup in the restroom or exposes parts of her body, revealing skin and showing erotic body parts. 7. She rubs her wrists up and down, and she rubs, touches or strokes her cheek.

8. She plays with her hair, pushing her fingers through it or twirling a few curls in a slow, sensual motion.

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9. She looks deep into your eyes while smiling, her pupils dilated. She blinks faster than usual or keeps looking into your eyes in a longing way, like your dog when you’re about to feed him. 10. When you touch her or put your arms around her, she’s comfortable with it; she might even snuggle closer to you. 11. When you extend your hand to her, she takes it and keeps holding it as if you are already a couple. 12. She bites her lips and licks them, showing her tongue, or she moistens her lips with lipstick. She puts a finger or nail into her mouth or over it in a sexual way — these are signs of sexual thoughts, and they are usually signs of arousal. 13. She rubs her legs together and presses them to the legs of the table or to your legs under the table — another sign of sexual arousal. 14. She plays with her wine glass, her jewelry or another object with a rubbing, stroking, sensual motion. 15. The way she sits or stands reflects your body language; she is mirroring you. Of course, she can’t be doing everything at the same time. But, if you encounter more than two or three of them (especially the more serious ones), she is likely to be heavily attracted to you and wanting you. A word of warning: Just as there are shy guys, there are also shy girls. They might have a harder time showing signs of interest and flirting with you. They might also try to hide these signs. You will recognize them from their girlish confusion. And now let’s see some negative body language, showing disinterest and less attraction to you: 1. She breaks eye contact and looks away when you try to look into her eyes. 2. She grimaces, showing that she is simply bored. She never smiles. 3. When you ask a question, she responds after a pause: “What did you say?” and it’s obvious that she is thinking about something else or is somewhere else mentally. 4. There are long, awkward silences in your conversation, and she doesn’t show any interest in breaking the silence or bringing up any new topics. 5. Her legs and arms are crossed; she is sitting at a distance, or she turns away from you. She leans back, and when you lean closer, she moves away or just acts as if she’s uncomfortable. 6. She doesn’t react to your jokes and doesn’t laugh with you; she may express polite surprise.

And the list goes on. Although persistence is a good trait to have and sometimes by being persistent, you can recover from the most hopeless situations, the negative signs described above show that you’ve done something wrong, and it might be time to move on and search for another girl. Never be disappointed; success will come with determination and

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time.

How long does it take to lay her? This is a question you might always have wondered about: How long does it take to lay a woman? The answer is: It depends on both of you: whether you’re willing to initiate properly and whether she’s ready for it or not. If you ask your friends or other guys, some of them will say that it took months to lay their girlfriends; some will say that they laid her the first night or on the first date. Generally, you have a fair amount of control over this, but laying a girl who is a total virgin and has never even been kissed will require some work. Most girls will have no problems having sex in a few dates or even on the first date if they like you. Those who require more work fit into three categories: They are very young and inexperienced, dealing with problems or playing you. Laying a young virgin will require a lot of patience. She will want to feel special with you and to know that you care about her, love her and won’t leave her after having sex. Teenage virgins are usually very idealistic and believe in true love. Taking such a girl’s virginity is a big responsibility. They very quickly get emotionally attached to the guy who does it. If you don’t really like her and are thinking about moving on soon, you should leave her before the act, unless she is an older virgin, in which case she falls into the second category. These are girls with problems: those who have never had an orgasm, whose first sexual experience was horrible, who were raped or who have serious inhibitions, maybe because of their religious upbringing or previous sexual experiences. These girls may be in another category, but still require you to be just as caring and responsible as with virgins. Their inhibitions can be overcome with love and patience, and after that, they will open up sexually. Such girls can give you a lot of love, and they are not girls you have sex with and then move on to another woman. The third category includes women who have rules for acting hard to get and playing with guys. Some of these girls are very hot with big egos and attitudes. They want and enjoy sex, but they also love it when men fight for them. You’ll hear excuses from these women, such as: “I’m not ready for sex yet” or “I don’t feel special yet.” If you think this is the case, take it as a test. She needs to feel that you are Man enough, so give it to her. A little bit of jerk attitude might help in these situations. Be more aggressive than usual. Don’t rape her, of course, but be more physical. These girls need to see how powerful you are. Show her that you have options, and you are ready to move on anytime. She should know that you are the selector, and she is not in a position to make the rules. You should be the one in charge and in control. Tell her that you are not open to playing her little games, and she can either give in or you will move on quickly.

Make sure you never set unreachable goals for yourself. If you want to lay every chick on the first date, it just won’t happen. With each girl you’re dating, you should decide whether you want a long-term relationship or you’re just having fun with each other. If you like her personality and she seems to be an ideal partner, it might be worth waiting a while even if

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she has sexual inhibitions to overcome. If you try to force things and attack her aggressively, you might scare an otherwise wonderful woman away. Of course, with experience, you’ll be able to sense how far you can go with a certain girl. On the other hand, always see through her game and, if you think she’s playing you, move on. Never wait months to lay a woman who’s not worth your time. And, even if a girl requires a lot of work, you don’t have to commit yourself to her, and you can be seeing other women at the same time. Never limit yourself or your opportunities. When does a relationship start? Personally, I usually consider that a relationship has begun after we’ve had sex. Kissing or hanging out together is nothing special for most girls, and you should take it the same way. At least up to the point of having sex, I consider it open, and I’m seeing other girls. It’s about having options. Why commit yourself to a girl who won’t even have sex with you?

Getting women in the mood Before we can even talk about sex or kissing, you have to get her in the mood for it. A few chapters ago, I talked about the four most important steps in the process: loosening up, rapport, comfort/trust and AROUSAL. Any time you go through these phases, you’re working on getting her in the mood. I’ve already mentioned some conversational aspects of this; now I’d like to talk about the physical part of the equation. Let’s say you’ve covered the basics. After a nice chat with each other, she is loosened up and feeling comfortable in your company. You can use the questions game at this point to direct the conversation toward more sexual topics and get her thinking about sex. Of course, you can come up with your own way of doing things — the questions game is just one tool of many you can use. Now we begin to lay the foundation on which we can start building the house. In saying this, I mean that you will need to get the physical part down as well. One thing that’s necessary is human touch. How do you expect a girl to be comfortable with your kissing her if you have never even touched her? I don’t want you to become another touchy-feely guy, but don’t be afraid to touch her when the mood is right. Touch her arms, shoulders, back and her hands occasionally. Touch her in a casual way from the beginning of the conversation, as if nothing has happened and it’s a normal part of human interactions. When she’s more comfortable in your company, stand or sit next to her. Try putting one of your hands on her back or waist area and embracing her. If she moves away, it means that she’s not ready to go more physical yet. Don’t force anything; take a few steps back and establish more trust with her. Talk a bit, have fun together and let her loosen up more. If you’re new to the whole thing and not used to touching girls, it might seem strange when you do it for the first time. You will need to practice it. The first step is to realize that without touching, you’re going nowhere. You’ll have to do it sooner or later if you want to get anywhere, so touch her as soon as you can. A Man has no problems with going physical. If

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you can’t do it, you won’t be able to INITIATE and LEAD. That’s one of the biggest mistakes you can make. So practice casual touching during your everyday conversations with people and especially women. Don’t overdo it, but when you’re talking to a girl or your close friends, touch them in nonsexual areas, including their hands, arms, shoulders and back. Pay attention to how they react though; some of your friends might not be comfortable with a guy touching them, and you should definitely NOT practice on your boss, unless you want her to sue you for molesting her. Back to your date: When touching her, always watch for signs that she’s giving. Don’t stare at her, but pay attention to the subtle indicators that she’s ready for the kiss. Usually, if the girl is smiling, looking into your eyes and asking you questions; if she doesn’t pull away when you lean closer; if she lets you keep your hand on her back when you’re sitting next to each other; if you’re having a pleasant conversation and talking about deeper topics or even about sex; or if she starts licking her lips with her tongue — she is ready for the kiss to happen. Now it’s time for you to initiate. But how? There’s a little test you can use to make sure you have the green light. Act as if you see a hair on her shoulder or on her face, and gently stroke it off. Or, if you want to be more direct, when you’re sitting close to her, you can simply touch her hair and stroke it a bit with your fingers. Or sweep it away from her ears. Letting you touch and play with her hair is almost as intimate as letting you kiss her. If she’s relaxed while you’re doing this and doesn’t pull away or grimace, she’s ready to be kissed. There are many ways to kiss her. Here are three: a direct and two subtler ways. The direct way takes balls, but it’s much easier. Tell her to close her eyes. If she asks why, tell her that you have a surprise for her. If she won’t close them, it means she’s not comfortable enough with you yet (if this happens, take a few steps back). When she closes her eyes, lean in and give her a gentle kiss on the lips. She will either kiss back or be stunned. If the latter happens, just smile and say: “That was good, wasn’t it?” This is the cocky way of doing it, but it works. To pull it off, you will have to be consistent with yourself. Never apologize for being the Man. You are the leader, and you will take what you want. If she ever acts annoyed or pissed, it’s just her test to see if you’re really a Man or only pretending. So smile at her, and act as if nothing has happened. If you want a more subtle way to kiss her, there is a technique you can use. Her neck and shoulders are very sensitive for a woman. By smelling her there, you’ll stir up her animal instincts. Just think about how dogs sniff each other during their mating game. First sit next to your girl. I also love to do this when slow-dancing. Wherever you do it, lean a little bit closer, and slowly start smelling her shoulders. Do it in a casual and relaxed way — both of you should enjoy it. Tell her that she has a wonderful scent, and you can’t stop yourself from taking it in for a while. Breathe deeply and sigh while doing it — she should feel your light breathing on her skin slowly turning her on. Take your time and spend a few minutes doing this, while advancing from her shoulders to her neck. Move to the sides of her neck and the nape just below where her hair grows. You can start gently kissing her neck after a few minutes of smelling. Move upward slowly with the kissing, and continue on her cheeks. When you feel that the time is right, lean in and

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give her a gentle kiss on the lips. The last way is the shy guy’s way. Just kidding — but it still takes the least balls to do. When you think she’s ready, pop her the question: “Would you like to kiss me?” She will most likely say: “I don’t know …” or “I’m not sure …” or “Maybe …” or “Yes!” If that happens, say “Hmmm, let’s see!” and go in for the kiss. Sometimes you can get “No” as the answer. If that happens, tell her that she really knows how to ruin a beautiful moment, and act offended in a playful sort of way. Tell her that now she has to make it up to you; then let her figure out a way to do it. When you feel that the moment has arisen again, kiss her. And if nothing works, you can still use the smelling technique to initiate kissing. Finally, if you’re unsure whether you’re a good kisser or not, practice. Kissing can be both gentle and aggressive. When kissing a girl for the first time, start gently and become more aggressive as both of you are getting turned on. Watch your partner’s reaction. Although you can only become a good kisser by doing it in real life with real women, there’s a little technique you can experiment with: Practice gentle, soft kissing on the back of your hand. Generally, during kissing, your lips should be relaxed and not too stiff. Do it as you would kiss your love, and don’t stress yourself, because your lips will become tense as well. When you use your tongue, don’t force it into her mouth. Put it gently in and see how she reacts. You can play with her tongue or pull yours back and let her put hers in your mouth. Avoid using too much saliva and slobbering into her mouth. And, of course, make sure you have good breath before kissing. Have some chewing gum or breath freshener with you, and don’t eat onions before your date. Flossing and using mouthwash or a tongue-scraper after brushing your teeth can do wonders to help you avoid bad breath. Ask your dentist for more info on the topic. I remember the first girl I kissed when I was a teenager. She looked good, but she had braces on her teeth: It was a pretty intense experience. I hesitated for a long time before making my move. I didn’t think she wanted to kiss me. But still, I popped her the question: “Do you want to kiss me?” She said, “I don’t know …” So I gathered all my courage and went in for the kiss. We ended up kissing for the whole night of the party. Even when you’re not sure whether to make your move or not, doing something is always better than doing nothing. And, usually, the barriers are only in your mind, and the girl would have been ready for the kiss much earlier.

The make-out A good make-out session after kissing can lead straight to sex. For this, you will need a

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calm place where you won’t be disturbed and the knowledge on how to do it well. The knowledge is here; I will talk about possible places in the next chapter. Let’s say you’ve just kissed. It doesn’t really matter whether you’re on the first date or you’ve already had a few. Take your time, do things slowly without rushing anything, and look deep into her eyes whenever you can. Start by running your fingers through her hair. Play with it, wrapping a few locks around your fingers. You can also grab a lock of hair and pull it softly. Smell her hair, neck and shoulders a bit whether you have done it already or not. Take deep, long breaths, as if you’re inhaling fresh air. Let your nose and mouth touch these areas when smelling them. After a while, start softly kissing her neck and shoulders. Slowly advance up to her face, till you arrive at her lips. Tease her by taking more time; kiss her forehead, cheeks, nose and chin before going for her lips again. This makes the girl want your kisses even more. When you’ve created enough anticipation, kiss her passionately for a while: Softly slide your tongue into her mouth, and let it wander around. While kissing her, explore the nape of her neck just below where her hair starts to grow. This is a very erotic area for women. They love it when you stroke and caress it. You can push away her hair, and smell the nape as well. This will drive her crazy. Alternate between smelling, short kisses on her face and neck, then deep erotic ones on her lips. Don’t forget her ears. Caress them with your fingers; kiss the perimeter area, suck on them, bite them lightly and, if she is comfortable with it, lick inside with your tongue. Not all women like this type of activity around their ears though. Biting her softly in places is a wonderful tool for arousal. Start with her neck and shoulders first. Make those subtle, very soft bites — you are not a cannibal after all. There is an erotic area on her arms where the forearms and upper arms meet. You can bite and smell her there — she will love it! Erotic sucking and licking on her neck, arms, shoulders, tits and thighs will arouse her as well; just don’t slobber. While doing some of the above, let your hands wander around her back and waist area. Then touch her belly, stomach and the sides of her body; caress and massage them gently. See how she reacts. If she is reluctant, take a few steps back; then advance slowly again. Mix it up from time to time: like a bit of kissing, then biting, etc., while stroking her with your hands. When you think she is ready, slowly move on toward her more sexual areas. Touch the sides of her breasts “accidentally,” or touch her butt a little while stroking her waist area. If she’s comfortable with this, escalate your touches: Start by lightly caressing her tits and her ass. Massage them gently through her clothes. If the place allows it, you can start undressing her or simply pull up her bra a little. Draw diminishing circles with your fingers and tongue on her breasts from the outside to the inside — such anticipation will drive her crazy. Then, grab her tits more roughly and suck her nipples. You can use licking, sucking and biting to discover other sensitive places on her body as well. Don’t ignore her ass, legs and thighs either. Massage them and let your hands explore these areas. She might enjoy soft pinches on her buttocks. You can even try spanking her ass once or twice in a soft but sexual way. Whether she likes stronger or lighter touches will vary from

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girl to girl. Experiment while making out and see how she responds. If she likes it, keep doing it. There are certain sexual areas that are the same for all girls, but each of them will have a specific part of her body that is more sensitive than the rest. You’ll have to figure this out over time by watching her reactions to your touches. When she’s comfortable with your playing with her tits, inner thighs and butt, move your hand toward her mons pubis (pubic area). Massage her pussy through her clothes. Slowly slide your fingers inside her trousers and massage her clitoris. If she lets you do it, put your fingers inside her panties and play with her bare pussy. You can also make subtle references to what you want by putting her hand on your lower belly then slowly sliding it downward toward your crotch. If she grabs your penis, she is very aroused. During the make-out, she may say things like: “We shouldn’t be doing this.” “It’s too fast for me.” This is the logical part of her brain (social conditioning) kicking in. Unless she’s upset, pulls away or tries to stop you, just ignore these comments. If you persist in giving her the sensations and arousal that are necessary, her animal instincts will take control, and she will be ready for sex. If she physically stops you, stop immediately! Don’t force anything, and DON’T RAPE HER! She might need some time and might be ready by the next time you meet. As I mentioned previously, some girls will require more time than others.

Her place or yours If kissing or making out happens on your date or at a club, it’s a good idea to change venues. A crowded café might not be the best place for having sex. Just tell her that you are tired of sitting and say, “Let’s go for a walk!” At this point, you have many options. If you think she is not yet ready, do something else like taking a walk in the park. If she is ready, there are usually three places to go: her place, your place and the car. OK, you can do it in the bushes at the park, but that rarely happens. Let’s look at each in detail: 1. Her place. This is only a possibility if she lives alone or you know that her parents are not home for a while. After the date, you can offer to walk her home or take her by car. If you go by car, park it close to her apartment in a place where you can leave it for a while. Start kissing her goodbye, but also work on arousing her.

Meanwhile, she might mention having to leave or having to get up early in the morning — these are just her logical brain’s excuses, which show that she is getting way too aroused. If this happens, gently but confidently pull her back and keep on arousing her even more. Don’t be aggressive, and don’t rape her! Her body should be showing signs that she wants you. If you need to repeat this process four times, do it four times. If you’re already fingering her pussy, but she still doesn’t invite you in, you’ll have to initiate it. Ask her if she wants to invite you for a cup of coffee or tea. Or simply tell her that you have to use her bathroom. In the house, sit down and talk for a bit. Let her get comfortable with your presence at her

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place. Slowly reinitiate kissing and making out. Make sure you have a condom with you in your wallet, so there will be no “technical problems.” At this point, sex is likely to happen. if she doesn’t want to give in, don’t force it. Give her some time; you have already taken the most important steps and are very close to laying her the next time. Here’s a real-life example. I took a girl who later became my girlfriend home on our third date. This was the second time I had given her a ride. The first time she had invited me over for a hot cup of green tea, but I had to get up early the next morning and knew that we would have sex eventually anyway. It was inevitable. So the second time, we’re sitting in front of her house and start making out in the car. She is damn horny, as I can tell from her moans and erotic kisses. At one point, she says she has to go and reaches to the backseat for her purse. I catch her arm, put her hand on my crotch and continue making out with her. I do the same the second time she tries to go and tell her that we have plenty of time, no need to hurry. She does this from time to time while I’m fingering her pussy, so finally I decide to make my move and ask: “Do you still have some of that green tea?” — while smiling innocently. You should have seen her face. Of course, we ended up having sex that night. With fewer clothes on and halfway to her orgasm, she asks: “Weren’t you going to have some green tea?” My response: “No thanks, I don’t like green tea. Only fruit tea.” 2. Your place. If she lives with her parents, this is the only solution apart from having sex in the car. I usually wait for a date or two before inviting her over. As a rule of thumb, always kiss and make out a little before inviting a girl to go home with you or going to her place! How soon you can invite her depends on the type of girl you are dealing with. If you know that she’s probably a virgin, it’s worthless to rush things. But if you’re having fun together, if she seems like a more sexual girl, and if you have already had that kiss, then go for it. The easiest way is to tell her that you have a fantastic recipe and you want to cook for her. If you can’t cook, offer to go shopping; then cook something with her help. Or tell her that you’ll order pizza and have some fun together. If she’s reluctant about coming over — even after some persuading from you — then she’s not yet ready for it. Wait for a few more dates, and make your offer again at a later time.

Another way to do it is to go on a date, then invite her over. Sit at a café that is close to your place, or go to a nearby park for a walk. Have something at home that will serve as a reason for her to come over. It can be your rare music CDs, DVD collection, photos you took during your travels, a common interest that you share or anything else. Introduce the

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idea on your date, and offer to share it with her later: “I just got my hands on that rare U2 album we talked about. I live around the corner. You can come over, and we’ll listen to it together.” Don’t be too eager about it, because she’ll sense your insecurity. Be casually confident as usual. Set the mood before she comes. Light a few candles, and chill some champagne or wine in the fridge. You can also put on some soothing, calming, seductive background music. When she arrives, kiss her at the door. Then lead her to the living room and talk a bit. She needs to get accustomed to the environment and loosen up a little. You can leave some interesting objects to talk about on your coffee table, such as a statue from your latest journey to Africa or a book about sexual positions or multiple male orgasms. Girls are curious enough to take up such a book and look inside. It can serve as a good conversation starter to direct the talking to “any” topic you want. The living room is the best place to start kissing and making out. You can arouse her with foreplay on your couch, then lead her to the bedroom. Have your condoms close to the bed, so you won’t have to search the whole apartment for them. But make sure they’re not in a visible place; she could easily freak out if she sees them before you have sex for the first time. This time, as a precautionary tale, here is another example from my life. I was very young and inexperienced. For once, my parents were away, and I invited a girl over to our house for the first time. I decided to cook for her, and then we’d watch a video together. I hadn’t seen the film before. The spaghetti was good. The video was damn boring. We had met in a club a few days earlier, where we had kissed, and she had come over without any hesitation in response to my first invitation. Instead of leading her straight to my bedroom, we spent two hours watching that damn boring film. By the end of it, she was pissed and bored and left the house quickly. I have never seen her again. Learn from my mistake: If it’s obvious that she wants sex, give it to her. If she doesn’t want to move that fast, give her some time. Romance her a little. But, for God’s sake, don’t make her watch a boring film when you could be having so much “fun” together! 3. The car. I don’t really recommend this place for having sex with a girl for the first time. If you do choose to do it there, make sure you have some experience. If you’ve never had sex in a car, it’s not the best idea to do it with a “stranger.” For one thing, it’s not comfortable. I had a good friend who was in a car with the hottest girl he’d ever met, and he couldn’t get it up from the stress. Such things happen … So don’t force it, unless you see that she is a really adventurous and sexual girl, who might be turned on by the thought of having sex in the car. If the girl seems less experienced or not yet ready for sex, avoid using the car.

What to have at home You might choose to go to your place with your date. I’ve already emphasized how important it is for you to have your life together. Your home is a reflection of that. If your place is a

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mess with Playboy magazines scattered all over it and you haven’t washed the dishes in a month, what do you expect her reaction to be? You live at your home, you go to work from there, and you arrive there in the evening. If it’s a mess, that’s what you’ll see each and every day. It influences your overall mood. Your place should be something that you enjoy and which reflects your personality. You are the one in charge. So don’t spare money on it. Even if you happen to live with your parents, you are still in control of your own room. I don’t want to stress the basics again. Clean your house every week, wash the dishes, and keep everything in order. Make sure that your bathroom and the toilet are clean as well. Use air fresheners. Your house shouldn’t look like a museum, so bring some life to it. If you are not sure about your taste, ask one of your friends or friend girls who has good taste in such things. A little something here and there, like a plant, a special piece of furniture, a Lava lamp or artwork can spice up the look of everything. There are many books and magazines on the topic, so I won’t go into detail here. Let’s assume you have your house together now. Everything is neat and clean, and it’s a place where you like to live. Make sure that you let in some fresh air, and set the temperature and humidity well before inviting a woman over. Here are a few things to have when a girl is coming: 1. Candles and/or incense. You can even buy special scented candles. These are useful tools for setting the mood. Girls are romantic creatures, and they would rather eat by candlelight than by the light of a big, harsh lamp. Another good idea is a dimmer switch, which you can use to control the intensity of your lighting. 2. Interesting books — a book about sex, for example. You can have her sit in the dining room, while you go to the bathroom for a few minutes. If you leave such a book on the table, it will get her attention for sure and give you something to talk about. 3. Interesting or exotic objects — such as stuff from your latest travels in Europe or even in a nearby city. Since most girls are curious, she will ask about it, and you can tell your stories and have something to talk about for a while. 4. A complete stereo and home video system. It doesn’t have to be the best one out there, but you might want to listen to a CD or watch a sexy DVD that you rent together. 5. A stack of audio CDs to set the mood. Putting on some music when she comes or while you sit together on the couch can really help her to relax. I recommend chill-out/ambient or light rock music, because most girls like that. Examples are:

Electronic: Buddha Bar series by Ravin and David Visan Café del Mar series by Jose Padilla

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Deep Dish Kruder & Dorfmeister LTJ Bukem Paul Oakenfold Royskopp Classic: Barry White Bruce Springsteen Enigma Enya Frank Sinatra Madonna Sade Sting Vangelis Of course, whatever you play, it should reflect YOUR OWN musical taste! Don’t listen to electronic music if you’re into rock just because I suggested it. The preceding are just examples of general music that should be good for setting the mood for your date. 6. Alcohol and ice cubes in the fridge. Champagne is probably the best, but even some inexpensive wine or some long drink like Bailey’s is OK. No need to spend thousands of dollars on champagne, but it should still be something decent. You can also find some nice cocktail recipes on the Net and mix cocktails for both of you to enjoy, like an orgasm cocktail, for example. 7. Chocolate, whipped cream and strawberries — ideal for sex play. 8. Bath bombs and such stuff in the bathroom if you decide to shower or bathe together. 9. Condoms, of course. Don’t put them in a visible place, but have them ready next to your bed in the drawer. You can also buy elegant sleeves or cases for your condoms. 10. By the way, I suggest you get a large double bed with many big, soft, fluffy pillows. Women love those. In addition to the above, you can come up with your own ideas. I have a friend who has a huge aquarium filled with spectacular fish at his house. He feeds them together with his dates, and they love it. It’s also a wonderful reason to say: “Have you seen my aquarium yet? You should come over to see it!” Note that the aquarium itself is just an example. You can develop your own routines and ideas for inviting girls over. Use your imagination. It’s also not bad to have some toys at home for sex play. By this, I don’t mean a 12-inch vibrator or your favorite penis pump, but rather something that can enhance foreplay or intercourse. For example, you can buy a little massage machine to attach to your fingers and use it on various parts of her body. Search the Net for some interesting tools. There are other

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possibilities, including silk scarves, soft brushes and feathers — these are easier to get and just as useful for some fun.

Final words Quote: “One day of experience is worth 100 years of theory.” First of all, thank you for reading my book. I hope you will find endless ways to use what’s written herein. In writing this book, my goal was not to give a universal recipe or step-by-step instructions for seducing women. That would have been impossible. Each and every one of us is different, with a different personality and mission in life. Instead, I’ve tried to give you reference points on which to base your own methods and ways of doing things. I’ve presented you with schemes that you can apply to your situation and formulate your own unique approach. I wish you good luck on your journey and success with your experimentations. Use this knowledge to further your development as a Man. Finally, never forget that women are not complicated machines, but real-life human beings made of flesh and blood, just like you and I. Treat them with respect, and relish the fulfillment and joy that a real woman can bring into your life. If you happen to have any questions, comments or suggestions, feel free to e-mail me at [email protected]. Your feedback is invaluable to me. Please visit www.seduction-and-dating.com/feedback.htm, where you can post your opinions/comments/suggestions about this book anonymously. Thank you!

CHAPTER 2 : 88

TIPS & TRICKS

The M3 Model?

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The M3 Model is the breakdown and analysis of the COURTSHIP phase of any male-female interaction: meaning, the period of time leading into any full-fledged sexual relationship. The general consensus is that from the time of meeting a girl to the time of closing a girl (depending on your definition--for adults it's typically sex, while for younger teens it's generally just making out/kissing. For older teens it's generally somewhere in between depending on age & experience), to do all 9 steps it should take anywhere from 7-11 hours of total face-time w/ the girl if you are running everything correctly. This does NOT have to occur all at once. It can be a few minutes here, a few hours there, etc. But the point is this: it should not take months & months of build-up. Rather, if it's going to happen at all, typically it will happen within the first few handfuls of dates. More specific time breakdowns will be added later for each phase.

M3 MODEL ATTRACT -> COMFORT -> SEDUCTION ---> Relationship

The attraction phase is divided into: A1 - Approach A2 - Attracting the HB or Female-to-male Interest A3 - Male-to-Female Interest The comfort phase is divided into: C1 - Building rapport C2 - Building emotional connection and physical connection C3 - Intimacy The seduction phase is divided into: S1 - Foreplay S2 - LMR S3 - Sex

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This is the first part of the courtship process. If you are seducing a woman, you must focus on creating mutual attraction at first.

The 3 Seconds Rule A guideline stating that a woman should be approached within three seconds of first seeing her. It is intended to prevent the man from thinking about the approach too much and getting nervous, as well as to keep him from creeping the woman out by staring at her for too long. Origin: Mystery. If You want to be in a group within 3 seconds of entering the room, just walk straight up to the first group of people that you see and open them. This is called the 3's rule. Remember, you are not only working the set, but the entire placeNo one else knows whether you are already acquainted with these people. It certainly seems as if you know them — you entered the venue, walked right up to them, and now they are having a fun conversation with you. You must be a social guy with lots of friends! Then you move on to the next set, and the positive perception of you continues to grow. You are becoming socially proofed in this venue. Notice the magical ease with which sets will open up to you when you have this level of social proof For this reason, it is important not to be too selective in choosing your sets. It's better to be in a set than to get picky and end up alone when you should be working the room. Another interpretation of the three-second rule states: Within three seconds of spotting a set that you want to open, you must open that set. This really adds a natural spontaneity to the approach. The difference in your state of mind is noticeable. A woman can usually tell when a man is working up the courage to approach her, which can lower her perception of his value. But if you follow the three second rule, she will have a feeling like you just popped up out of nowhere. A very nice energy is added to the interaction when following this rule. The point of the 3 second rule is to encourage you to approach women fast enough to keep your internal voice from talking you out of it and and to avoid hesitation. You do not want a woman to see you hesitate. The longer you hesitate, the more insecure and sappy you appear. Also, hesitation creates an added sense of nervousness to your mental state and gives her time to size you up and possibly decide not to talk to you - a personality trait you do not want to portray when approaching women. No Short Cut: Some will get close to a woman, while doing something else, perhaps, with the illusion that she will say "hi" or that somehow, by being close to her, he will increase the chances of talking together with her. Maybe so, however, most times this fails. Why does this fail? Doing that, also deminishes your manhood. She realises you want to talk to her, yet you adapt a childish, jelly-back way of getting close. She starts to think, "this guy is not a man, hes a jelly-back!" Even if you get to talk to her, somehow, your chances of penetrating her is next to nill. Just do it. Go! Act in 3 second seconds as the default rule, even if you have no idea how you will continue. If you don't have an opener or opening line in mind by the time you're in front of her, at least

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just say "Hi". If you act in 3 second seconds, she will notice it, no matter where she just came in from' or where you came from' or even how you passed by each other. She will see the spontaneity and decisiveness in your approach and it can only work in your favor. If you wait, hesitate, then decide to approach, you put yourself in a weaker state. Hesitating will give your self-doubt a chance to create imaginary of bad outcomes and add undue insecurity to your approach. Using this rule, you don't need to wait for eye contact or for her to notice you or for an opportunity to present itself. You simply see something you like and you go right up to it. You are also doing yourself a favor by following the 3 second rule. In three seconds, you have no time to become nervous, selfconscious, sweaty, shaky - all the obvious signs of a weak jelly-back, lacking confidence, quality, power, or assertiveness. Being a weakling around women is a big turnoff to beautiful girls. Even if you start sweating, or getting shaky or stutter while talking to the woman after following the 3 second rule, you weren't that way when you initiated contact! The first impression is what counts. Guys! If that first impression of you is of a confident and spontaneous man, her feelings for you will be upbeat and positive, which greatly minimizes the chance of you trembling while talking with her. It sets the pace and helps keep your inner voice at bay, allowing you the chance to keep your confidence up. The 3 second rule, though, is not absolute - you may simply not notice her when she enters your environment, or maybe you'll be tied up with something that might in some way stop you from approaching her (real obstacles, not your imagined ones). The 3 seconds start counting from the moment you have spotted her and is free to approach. When those two conditions are met, you really don't have the time to think deep thoughts, or try and figure out whether or not she noticed that you didn't approach her because you were either too preoccupied, restrained, or simply oblivious - the clock is always ticking. Keep it moving! There is a reason it's a RULE and not just a recommendation. In just about any situation, you are better off approaching quickly and without hesitation. Successful people make quick decisions and change them rarely. After seeing the chick, just do it! Dont rather wait around to think about the "perfect" opener or hesitating because of self-doubt. Most guys just stand/sit around, drooling @ the chick they want to apporach rather than just going up and doing the approach. While they stand/sit there, the voice in their head goes through every possible rejection scenario and scares the hell out of them. They cause themselves to get nervous and scared and if they finally do get the nerve to do the approach, they are walking up to her as a nervous wreck. In the mean time the chick had time to size him up and to consider him a wimp and a jelly-back to be discarded. The longer you wait, the more time gets created for cockblock scenarios to present themselves.... Go get em tiger, and remember, get em in 3.

Meeting Her On The Street

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Have you ever been walking down the street, minding your own business, when all of a sudden, you see a drop-dead gorgeous woman that you'd cut off your right hand to meet walking along as well? At that moment, you're probably thinking to yourself: "I want to meet that girl! But how?" Arguably, meeting a woman on the street, cold, is one of the hardest things to do! People are busy, they feel exposed on the open sidewalk, and their defenses are UP. You ever have a bum accost you while walking someplace and ask for money? Well guess what: Trying to meet a woman on the street is about equal to that! So what's a guy to do? Just give up and let that beautiful woman pass you by? Of course not. I have the DEFINITIVE SOLUTION for you boys: Trying to stop a moving TARGET or group is POINTLESS. Even though they may only be walking to a club to meet someone, and you are good enough to meet, their moving gives them what I like to call a "false time constraint." In other words, they are in a HURRY to get NOWHERE FAST! Trust me when I say this... DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP A MOVING TARGET. Why? Well, I'll get to that in a bit. See, you KNOW that girls aren't going to walk FAR. Most people you see on the street, if they're walking, they're doing so because they're on their way to someplace CLOSE. Otherwise, they'd be in their car driving. They go from the car to the location they are getting to or back. This works to your advantage, because if you see a woman walking down the street, you can be sure of one thing: She's going someplace CLOSE. So here's what you do: Don't give eye contact. Look BUSY talking with your friends or on your cell phone. Don't give ANY attention to her. Don't get her to notice you. Then ... follow her! Now, I'm not suggesting you STALK her! That would be creepy, and I know you're not a creep. You're just doing some recon work. Girls never walk far, you're just going to tag along for a little bit. Example: let's say you're walking down the street and you see a really hot girl walking towards you with a friend, and you think to yourself, "I want to get that girl!"

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So you play it cool and IGNORE them completely as they pass you by. When you turn to see where they were going, you see them enter one of the nearby restaurants. So you follow them into the restaurant and notice that they're seated at a booth. Congratulations, you are now in the type of environment where you can approach them! Moving targets SUCK. Stationary targets are like shooting Fish in a Barrel. So from this point, you have a lot of options available to you. Usually, you want to allow the girls time to settle in first and have their waiter serve them. Just chill out at the bar or somewhere inconspicuous and wait for the opportune moment to strike. When that moment comes, use the tactics you've learned from The Art Of Approaching and approach these woman like NORMAL. I'm sure you'll be able to get your target's number in no time. And if you're REALLY good, you may even be invited to join them for lunch! =) So here are some general rules for approaching women on the street. RULE: Don't stop a moving target! RULE: Moving targets don't go far. Follow them. RULE: Wait for the opportune time to approach. A girl doesn't WANT to be stopped. Even if they are going NOWHERE, they still THINK they're going somewhere. So in conclusion: DONT STOP A MOVING TARGET! WAIT FOR THE RIGHT TIME TO APPROACH AND YOU WILL WIN

Rejection and Approach Anxiety

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Logically, rejection causes us no harm. But emotionally, rejection can be a punishing experience. To understand this, we must look at the ancient environment for which we were designed. In a tribal group, there will be some small number of available women of breeding age. When a man approaches one, he risks rejection, and if that happens, all the other women will know, which will diminish his value in their eyes - maybe to the point where none of the women will mate with him. This is called preselection - women look for social validation of their choices. A suitor who is preselected will be more attractive, whereas a man who has been rejected will be less so. Another factor regarding approach anxiety is the possibility that she may already be taken, in which case there is a component of real, physical danger to any male who approaches her. For all these reasons and more, men are naturally selected to experience approach anxiety. Logically, of course, modern society fixes these problems. If I am rejected, I can simply go to another part of the bar, or leave the bar entirely. I will probably never see any of those people again. But my emotions don't know that. My emotions are trying to do what's best for me.

So how can you avoid rejection? The answer is: you can't. It isn't the solution to avoid being vulnerable. Rather, the solution is to embrace your vulnerability, to embrace rejection, and let the Field show you what is good and what is bad. Most approach anxiety is a result of imagined rejections, not real ones. Eventually, time in the Field will desensitize you to the emotion of rejection. In a game where you might play five or ten sets every night, losing a few of them here and there never really seems like a big deal.

Mission for Newbies

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I undertand that internal challenge many newbies feel. I must deal with many emotions before during and after I go out to meet girls. Before is loneliness. Sometimes I just want to stay in and mope. So I must FORCE myself to SOLVE the emotion and not just lie there. During, I am in that AWARE state where the girls make me feel so weird and I have to deal with that to act normal and in control. And then afterwards, if I go home with nothing, I must have the strength to know that I am working with probabilities and know that by looking only at this day I am blinding myself to the big picture. Now is the time to stop Babe-watching. Get into a fun mood (which I know is hard for the very first girl but you can fake it) and walk up to many girls (ugly or not) and say, "Hi." Remember to smile when you approach. Then ... and here is the best part, say any non-stereotypical opening line (INTRO scripting) you would like and then after what-ever banter you began with, say, 'Pleasure meeting you" and walk off with a smile and a skip to your walk. Example: girl is there. shes only a 7. walk up and say, "Hi. Did you know elvis prestley dyed his hair? what was his original hair color? Guess? Nope, blond. Isnt that odd? Pleasure meeting you." Leave. Dont be a goof and over animate yourself. Be natural and fun and in a good mood. Now, do that to EVERY girl you can. Ugly or not. You will meet many girls, and get over your intro fear. Well actually, you wont ever get OVER it, but you will learn to PRETEND you dont have it. THAT is your mission. I would like you to do this and yes, this is going to be a different day than you've done before. The past does not have to equal the future. If you keep doing the things you've done then you'll keep getting the things you've gotten - and that is NO GIRLS. This is your mission. Talk to 20 women in one day. Go ALONE. Do not antimidate girls by having friends with you. Not 1 or 2 girls either. 20. That is a realistic #. If you feel it isnt, then Im telling you now you are completely wrong and your emotions are fighting you. You will CONTROL these emotions head on. As for the Go For It attitude, this will only come AFTER the first success in the day. You have to work DESPITE not having this emotion for the first one. AND if the first one doesnt come off as if you are a fun guy, then you still won’t feel good. But if you FINALLY get a fun response, then your success with give you the GO For It attitude to now go to the next 18 girls. This is the only TRICK to getting the attitude you wish. Too bad you can't get it for the very first, but if you could easily do it, then every other guy could too and that wouldnt be a good thing for you any more. All the other guys would have gotten to the girls first. Remember, they always go up and act like typical GUYS. How many walk up and smile and be fun and then just leave without hitting? Again, this is your MISSION and I expect this to occur THIS week. Post your results in detail here. No stop reading and get out there and meet 20 strangers for fun. You'll learn alot. tell us what you learned.

Curing Rejection

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Here follows an essay that describes how to overcome rejection. It's my personal journey, though I think that it has some new ideas to offer people in terms of the stages of the process. I hope that you will all gain from it. The following may help some of those struggling kick off their game. Feedback much appreciated Well to any of you RAFCs out there you've heard us say it before: 'There is no such thing as rejection' But did you get it? Do you understand how that phrase can be real to you? Or are you still, as I believe many of those just waiting to crack the psychological barrier are, trying to accept what we say while harbouring a secret belief that you're trying to believe a lie. Well what we are saying is true and I can prove it to you. Lets start with a simple question. 'What is Rejection?' The answer to this question seems simple: social disapproval and shunning. You get excluded or lose social status within your social group. 'Why do we fear/dislike rejection?' In evolutionary terms people needed to function as a group to survive. Rejection is a tool of conformation and a psychological force of control of action. It is likely that some genetic factors influence our psychology to make it so pervasive as it is in adult life. However, despite the predisposition to develop it being partially genetic it is ultimately a result of life experiences and social conditioning. "Is rejection a force in the real world?" It's controlling you right now isn't it? Perhaps the question we need to ask is more profound. "Is rejection itself real?" No. It's entirely in your head so-to-speak. Thats why we can all say 'there is no such thing as rejection' and accept that and the reason you are not yet comfortable with it. Put simply that statement is a statement about the SPEAKER'S reality which makes 100% sense to them. If you feel a conflict with your beliefs about reality it's because you havn't learned how to believe that statment yet. Since it's all in your mind believing there is no rejection is the same thing as there not being any such thing. "How can I stop feeling rejection?" Ok, now we're getting profound. There are several approaches. I'd do them all if I were you.

The most fundemental arrises from NLP: Change your beliefs. Create memories that support it. You'll find a lot of hypnosis tracks useful in achieving this. Work on installing an internal locus of control. Not looking to anyone else for approval and other LEADERSHIP qualities (that's right - leaders are people

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who get the evolutionary exception to the rejection problem -they MUST be willing to make decisions from their own stand point). Desensitisation - a psychological technique. Basically you're exposing yourself to the situation so often that you learn to disassosiate the feeling of rejection from approaching women. So the answer here is make the plunge. However there is more than one way to desensitise and we will talk about other arrangements which will make it more effective. Psychological desensitisation is also possible. Imagine situations first. Visualise them, go through with it until you feel comfortable in your mind. You're training yourself slowly out of the problem. The next stage up is to imagine doing things when you're in the situation you would normally do them get yourself as close to doing them as you can and stay in that state. If you push yourself in that way often enough it may help. However there will come a time when you must stop yourself doing this as this technique can be used as an excuse for not actively desensitising yourself. Don't let this technique be your secret reason for failure. Like all these things they are crutches to get you walking - nothing more. Detatch from the outcome. That's right. You have to absolutely not care how the situation turns out. It's nothing to do with you. She doesn't even know you. If you care in anyway then you're linking YOUR confidence and YOUR validation and YOUR sense of your social status to the interaction. Detatching is a huge step in making rejection a thing that happens to other people. Make meeting woman your experiment, your video game. Here's the big one: REFRAME (that's from NLP) rejection. Once you're detatched from rejection you'll be able to do some miraculus things. For a start you can begin to see rejection as funny. Visualise being blown off outrageously and find it really really funny. Keep doing this until it actually is funny. Now that you've got that belief use it in your desensitisation. If you ever get (note the inverted commas) 'rejected' laugh. Do it right in front of the girl. That'll send her for a loop. Sometimes the fact that they have no power to destroy your ego and blow you off actually shows them your higher value and they'll become very into you. If not - beauty is common. She didn't know you. And hell do you want a biatch like that in your life? Achieving the maximum effect from desensitisation and reframes: Wingmen (or just your peer group). Wingmen are better because they're in on the game and 'get it' so they'll find it just as funny and RESPECT you for going up and asking in the first place. If your friends are worth having they'll laugh at it with you. Make sure you put it accross as this really funny thing that psycho biatch from hell said that was so funny. They'll see you don't care. They're the people you'll go back and laugh at it with and guess what....They're your REAL social group.

Enlightenment dawns:

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So if you can use the wingman crutch it's very powerful. Suddenly your social group enjoys when women blow them off. It's funny. It really is now, because it's a fun thing you talk about with your mates. It's a thing you laugh about thinking or reading about and even when it happens. You're reprogramming of your brain is nearly complete. Suddenly approaching women is fun and funny and rejection isn't an issue. You're gaining experience. You're desensitising yourself entirely. There's one more thing left to handle. You're still using crutches. Defeat wingman Dependance: The thing is this way is the best way to help you get round feeling rejection. but you want to be alpha in and of yourself. What you're really doing with the wingman crutch is transferring desire for approval from the woman to your mates. Now you also should have been working on internal locus of control and not needing approval. That will help you with being independant of even your wingman's approval. Start gaming on your own. Come back and tell your wingmen about it. That means you still have the crutch to a lesser degree. Eventually you'll start to get the satisfaction on your own. Eventually you won't need them. Now you have to begin mental rehersals of your wingmen dissing you (which no descent wingman will ever do) and reframe that as funny. It doesn't mean don't take their advice. A good wingman is a man's best friend. It does mean that if ever you end up separated from them or falling out with them there's no danger of a complete PUA meltdown. It'll make you more alpha in your group. When you've done this process read the statement again: 'There is no such thing as rejection' Now you can believe it.

Final words

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The newbie mission will make an APUA of you... that's Aspiring Pick-Up Artist. Some of you have a hard time with the 3s rule & get approach anxiety. Ok so you're scared about approaching sets or even lone girls. That's ok. AA is natural. To be worried about this would have at one time ensured your survival. Mystery will tell you how we're still wired up for Tribal Society. Speak to the wrong girl, some important man's lady & BAM, you get hit with a rock in the head & his cronies are stomping on your skull... all because you chatted to his 'bird.' Unless you're in Chapeltown, Brixton, or Redneckville things should be different now. No need to be SO worried. Let's get around this AA. JUST GET OUT & BE AROUND PEOPLE. Or go out & do something interesting that you've always wanted to do. Something that many people would envy. Then when you get back, have a mental field report ready to tell someone about. You went rock climbing on a dry wall indoors & you thought that the rope guy had you safe when in fact he'd forgotten all about you & you'd just free-climbed 100ft. You had a day off so you pointed the car in a random direction & drove somewhere just for the hell of it... "& guess where I ended up!? Outside my old school, brought back so many memories..." (cut to story about when you were a kid & did ______ whatever. Return to innocence. She'll join you. Childhood was carefree. Talk about that. Talk about the time you tried to bury the dog when you thought it was dead & he was just anesthetized from the vets... or when you painted the cat blue because you thought grey was boring... "I was about 19 at the time!" then show you're just playing like I did with you. No I was never cruel to animals, love your dog... just don't LUUUURVE you're dog, Capice? Communicate. LIVE then tell someone about it. Get a girl's opinion on something it doesn't have to be canned. Find what works for you. Who are you exactly? Do you even know? Go do the WHO MEDITATION. Be aware of yourself. Sort your frame out. Know yourself. Do you react to everything or do you create it? CREATION & REACTION are the same word if you 'C' things differently. C? If you're not ready to approach get out somewhere you're unfamiliar with, ask a HB directions to some place. Tell her how much you love being in unfamiliar territories but that you like the feeling of the unknown. Ask her if she knows what that feels like. Boom, you just approached a girl & you slung an opener in there. Do what I used to do to build up my confidence... Grab a gym bag... take your watch off approach the most gorgeous girl you can find; "Excuse me, do you have the time?" "2:20..." "Damn, I'm late... do you know the way to the sports centre? I got a game starting in 10 minutes..." She either knows or she doesn't... "It's just over there huh? Damn what a TREK... can I get a piggy back?" I was on the way to Leeds Olympic Pool (Which had to be renamed Leeds international pool because the builders fucked it up & made it one inch short of 50 meters) I was full of energy & enthusiasm & saw this HOT girl. I was hornier than a field of Rhinoceroses because of my WANKTIONS (Wank Sanctions) & approached her less than 500 yards from the pool on Wellington St. I asked her directions to the pool, & she didn't know... I busted her on it & then directed HER to the pool. Zany, but she loved it. Before she was stood like a tool at a bus stop & then some nutter come over & makes her laugh. She's happy I'm

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there. Better than being alone. I actually ended up having her IGNORE her bus & it drove past her so she could suffer all that I gave her. "What? That was yours? You just missed your bus?" "Yeah... I'm supposed to signal" "Wow... not only do you not know where the world's greatest non-Olympic pool is, but you suck with public transport..." "Well I WAS kind of distracted..." "Are you one of those chicks that stands on the street at night... waiting for taxis, or are you the sort that books one in advance?" "Oh you should have seen me at the weekend, every taxi in Leeds was trying to pick us up." *Arm Kino* "Well maybe I should see you next weekend when I pick you up... you'll love my ride..." "Oh really... what ride is that..." "Oh it's a Number 921 Double Decker Arriva..." (The bus she'd just missed.) (She belly laughed) *Kino* "Look I'm going to Headingley on Friday, checking out town with some friends Saturday... Sunday I'm back at Hi-Fi for the bands... so which is best for you?" "Busy boy aren't you..." *Testiculate* (Like Gesticulate) "I work hard... party hard." (I think I adjusted my crotch as I said that... I always subliminally associate my groin area with a PARTY...) I think it works. There's a party going on in my pants & all HBs are invited to it. *Major bodyrocking* "So I'm gonna be doing lengths in about ten minutes & you're going to stand here waiting to miss another bus or..." (There's one length that she oughta do... girls want sex, have that in your mind when you sarge. "Well yeah I'll be out Saturday but..." *KINO* "Forget the boyfriend, we'll keep it a secret... in fact, I could just kill him & wear his skin." *Takes step back* "Omigod! You psycho." *Kino* "Sorry, just watched Texas Chainsaw Massacre AGAIN... it's just that girl that runs all over she's so... yeah." "I was just going to say it's my friends 21st..." "Ah well, hey, good talking to ya..." with a smile I turned my back on her & started walking slowly. One... two... three... F-

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"Well aren't you going to ask me for my number?" I stop, turn around... Head tilted to the side & down but looking directly at her... lift my head up high maintaining eye contact, then break & stare at the clouds as if considering this. *sighs* "Ahhhh, she's alive... (Walking back just two paces) I whup it out..." (My phone you perverts) "Ok what is it?" She gives me her number... This is EZ. All you need is confidence & confidence is built with experience & knowing yourself & what you're capable of. Ask a chick what her favourite colour is. When she tells you, argue with her... tell her she's wrong, "Not correct sorry. It's actually pea green." "What? It's Purple." "Nope... it's green... sucks to be you." Play with her. Afterwards say, "OK I'm being an asshole because I'm sick of everyone LOVING me all the time. Just for a change I wanted someone to disagree with me.... would you like an argument?" "No thanks..." "Yes you would?" "What is with you, I don't want an argument... why would I?" "Because you love it... you're arguing with me right now..." "No, YOU'RE arguing with ME..." "You started it..." "How?" "Lying about your favourite colour..." "Omigod!" "Green! ... Hey, thanks, that was a GREAT argument... I needed that. Are you allowed to make friends?" C / F playful. Like you played when you were a kid. Only now the first chance you get, the kino is on. Make kino your nature. That doesn't mean go around GRABBING girls. Just accompany some of the things you say with a sweet little touch of warmth. The arm, her knee if she's sitting down. Don't leer over people. Join their eye level. If she's sitting, sit also & mirror her. If she's stood then get ON HER LEVEL. Tilt your head when she speaks, show interest but don't complement her beauty unless she's a Warpig, make her feel good about something if she has LSE. If she's a 10 & loves herself, bring her down.

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Don't do what every AFC does. Don't try to arouse her sexually. Do arouse her curiosity. Get some NUMBER CLOSES. Get some kiss closes. Lower yourself to the Tic Tac routine if you must You don't need to take any of these lines... live your own way & make things your own. READ some more MM ebooks & get out in the field & just talk to people. Any people. Practice opening up conversations with guys if you have to... get USED to approaching. Heck if your confidence is that bad, approach ANIMALS, freaking pigeons if you have to. Practice what you would say. Daft isn't it... they're just animals... so are girls... & you can have her gawping at you like an excited puppy when you get the approach down. APPROACH SOMETHING. Come up with your own material & field test it one night a week every week. Be INTERESTED in LIFE so you will BE INTERESTING then you wouldn't have to ask these questions. You'd live life to the full that you could enchant her pants off just by telling her about your visit to the dentists. Be like Mystery, stack routines & patterns... know so much about MM that you can sail through the nine stages... be like Juggler: Ultimately... BE YOURSELF... the best version of yourself that you can be. HAVE FUN. It's fun. Enjoy it.

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