Tantra and Kama Sutra Sex Positions

A Modern Erotic Photo Interpretation By Al Link and Pala Copeland Photographs by Al Link ©4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra eBooks, December 2003. ISBN 0-9732873-4-9

Internet interactive edition with: • 131 pages • 100 erotic photographs and illustrations • and 303 hot links

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Table of Contents About This eBook ............................................................... 1 List of Photographs ............................................................. 4 Introduction......................................................................... 8 Classic Texts and Modern Practices ............................... 8 Tantra & Kama Sutra Sex Positions ................................. 14 Man on Top................................................................... 14 Woman on Top ............................................................. 20 Face to Face .................................................................. 35 Sideways ....................................................................... 43 Sitting............................................................................ 54 Standing ........................................................................ 63 Opposites....................................................................... 66 Other Positions – Pregnancy......................................... 76 Shallow-Deep Thrusting Technique ............................. 81 Foreplay ............................................................................ 83 More Exotic Practices ....................................................... 93 Loving Body Discovery................................................ 93 Massage....................................................................... 102 Sexual Fire Breath....................................................... 110 BDSM Play ................................................................. 114 Sacred Space ............................................................... 125 Sacred Bathing ............................................................ 127 Oral Sex .......................................................................... 130 “69” ............................................................................. 130 Cunnilingus ................................................................. 131 Fellatio ........................................................................ 134 Watching ......................................................................... 138 Afterplay ......................................................................... 142 Summary and Conclusions ............................................. 144 Classic Love Texts.......................................................... 145 Kama Sutra.................................................................. 145 Ananga Ranga............................................................. 152

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The Perfumed Garden ................................................. 153 Recommended Reading .............................................. 155 Related Products ............................................................. 157 About Authors Al Link and Pala Copeland .................... 158 eBooks available from 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra 159 eBooks by Al Link & Pala Copeland.......................... 159 eBooks by Other Authors............................................ 161 Ordering a CD-ROM Copy of this eBook ...................... 164 Give Us Your Comments................................................ 165

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Tantric & Kama Sutra Sex Positions

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About This eBook We have included 100 erotic color photographs and illustrations, each of which is featured in large format on a single page for your viewing pleasure. Through these lovely photos we have endeavored to capture the emotional and energetic connection of Tantric sacred lovemaking rather than simply illustrate sexual positions and technique. These are real people in real bodies. Probably they have bodies that look a lot like yours. The lovers in these photos are experiencing and expressing something beautiful. This book’s message is that you can have what they are showing you. We suggest that the first thing you do is scroll through the photos without reading the accompanying text. Get the message of the book visually first and then go back for a second look, this time reading the explanatory text with the photos. In this modern interpretation (not translation) of the classic love texts from India and Arabia we have omitted the redundant descriptions of each position that are commonly found in illustrated books of sex. Instead we comment on how and why the position is used, and we include useful information about sacred lovemaking practices. If you have ever browsed through a book illustrating sexual positions you will recall that some of the positions shown seem to be anatomically impossible. This is because a drawing can show people doing easily what no ordinary human being could ever actually do. When selecting sexual positions to try, don’t bother unless you see the position illustrated with a photograph. All of our sexual positions are illustrated with photographs. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Tantric & Kama Sutra Sex Positions

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There are some sexual positions, even though ‘doable’, require the lovers to be exceedingly acrobatic, physically flexible, and very strong. These positions appeal to practitioners of “extreme” Tantra Sexual Yoga. Almost every endeavor that requires a discipline of body and mind has an extreme variation. Practitioners of Extreme Tantra Sexual Yoga utilize lovemaking positions as they would other Hatha Yoga postures, as an advanced, disciplined physical meditation technique, rather than as an ecstatic sacred lovemaking practice. We have eliminated these extreme postures from this manual. Most of the positions illustrated here are suitable for lovers of all ages, and with some selectivity, in various stages of physical fitness and health. In other words, you don’t have to be an athlete, young, or perfectly fit and healthy to use this manual. Since our definition of sex goes far beyond sexual intercourse, including all the delicious foreplay and the deep emotional connection of afterplay, we have included sections with commentary on those topics. Also included are illustrated sections on oral sex (cunnilingus and fellatio), BDSM (bondage/discipline/sadism/masochism) play, loving body discovery, massage, creating a sacred space and sacred bathing. In addition we have added hot links to a number of published printed versions of the classic texts so if you wish to read and learn more you can locate those books easily. This eBook is revised and updated continuously with new contents and refreshed hot links. If you are the first person to send an email alerting us to a link that is not working, we © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Tantric & Kama Sutra Sex Positions

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will send you a FREE replacement version electronically by email as soon as it is ready. This document is also available on a Compact Disc (CDROM).

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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List of Photographs 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23.

Yin /Yang (illustration) Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – knees up) Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – legs over shoulders) Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – man standing) Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – man supports his weight off the woman) Woman on Top – “Tender Surrender” (variation – lying face to face) Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation – full front saddle ride) Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation – full front saddle ride -2) Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation - partial side-saddle ride) Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation – Side-saddle) Woman on Top – “Sleeping Dragon” Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation – Grasshopper) Woman on Top – “The Queen’s Ecstasy” Woman on Top – “Slipslide” Woman on Top – “Water Saddle” Woman on Top – “Backsaddle” Face to Face – “Grasshopper” (variation sitting) Face to Face – “Happy Capture” Face to Face – “Heaven and Earth” Face to Face – “The Lift” Face to Face – “The Lift” (variation – full) Face to Face – “One Crutch” Face to Face – “Two Crutches”

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24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. 51. 52. 53.

Al Link and Pala Copeland

Sideways – “Spoons” Sideways – “The Lover’s Scissors” Grounding (illustration) Sideways – “The Lover’s Scissors” Sideways – “The Lover’s Scissors” – 2 Sideways – “The Lover’s Scissors” – 3 “Yab Yum” (variation – classic lotus) “Yab Yum” (variation - kneeling) “Yab Yum” (variation – sitting in a chair) “Yab Yum” (variation – “see saw”) “Yab Yum” (variation – “full see saw”) “Yab Yum” (variation – kneeling - 2) “Yab Yum” (variation – kneeling - 3) “Yab Yum” (variation – sitting in a chair) Standing – “Climbing the Tree” Standing – “Clinging To The Tree” Opposites – “Dog” Opposites – “Dog” – 2 Opposites – “Dog” (variation – pulling on the reins) Opposites – “Backslide” Opposites – “SeeSaw” Opposites – “Gorilla” – (variation – pulling on the reins) Opposites – “Gorilla” (variation – masked) Other Positions – Pregnancy – “The Cradle”(variation – “L”) Other Positions – Pregnancy – “The Cradle” (variation II) Other Positions – Pregnancy – “The Cradle” (variation II - 2) Other Positions – Pregnancy – “Happy Capture” (variation – “T”) Shallow / Deep Thrust (illustration) Conversation with wine Conversation with wine – 2

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54. 55. 56. 57. 58. 59. 60. 61. 62. 63. 64. 65. 66. 67. 68. 69. 70. 71. 72. 73. 74. 75. 76. 77. 78. 79. 80. 81. 82. 83. 84. 85. 86. 87. 88. 89.

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Dancing Kissing Undressing Undressing – 2 Dressing Up Dressing Up – 2 Lotions, creams and powders Loving Body Discovery Loving Body Discovery – 2 Loving Body Discovery – 3 Loving Body Discovery – 4 Loving Body Discovery – 5 Loving Body Discovery – 6 Loving Body Discovery – 7 Loving Body Discovery - Eating Out Massage Massage – 2 Erotic Massage Erotic Massage – 2 Sexual Fire Breath Sexual Fire Breath – 2 BDSM Play Torture Teasing Blindfolds and tie-ups Sweet surrender my darling Dark stranger Paddle Play Dominatrix Golden Showers Beginner BDSM Kit Holy Ground Honoring the God and Goddess Merging in the ocean of consciousness Washing away cares of the world Serving one another 69

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90. 91. 92. 93. 94. 95. 96. 97. 98. 99. 100.

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Eating cotton candy Sweet copulins pheromones Clitoral Kissing Please Sir, may I have more? Treat with trust Eye Candy Show me what you like Carry on while I take a rest I get all wet watching you please yourself In the glow… Thank you my darling

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Introduction Classic Texts and Modern Practices The term “sacred sex” may seem somewhat of an oxymoron in western society, a contradiction in terms. Suggesting that you can find your way to God through sexual activity has been a bit like suggesting you can eat your way to thin-ness or fuck your way to virginity. Partaking in wildly passionate sex and seeking an intensely spiritual life just haven’t been part of the same curriculum. We’ve been taught that pursuing sexual pleasure, enjoyable as that may be, is at best hedonistic and at worst damaging for our souls. To be a highly spiritual person is to be essentially sexless. It’s an either / or situation. But that view is changing. The concept of sacred sex, finding spiritual union through a sexual one, is slowly gaining ground in North America. Our psyches are certainly ripe for it. As a society we’re obsessed with sex. In part it’s a lustily healthful obsession, a celebratory dance of life’s great force, but much of it flounders in darkness and neurosis – sex for power, sex for profit, sex for oblivion. We use and abuse sex for everything from selling soap to making or breaking political leaders. At the same time there’s a spiritual hunger running rampant through the land. The ache for meaning stretches from radical through traditional—from new age spiritual to longestablished religious, from pagan to fundamentalist. We’re all screaming for substance. Well why not unite the two? Bring sex and spirit together and find your magic! The idea’s definitely not a new one. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Ritualized sex has been an acknowledged sacred pathway in Eastern philosophies for several thousand years. Tantra, probably the most commonly known form of sacred sexuality, has its home in branches of the Hindu and Buddhist cultures of India and Tibet. Based on a belief that the union of male and female principles(yin and yang, yab and yum) will lead to enlightenment, traditional Tantra uses a complex series of sounds, visualizations, breath control, and sexual positions combined with prayerful thought to reach the heights of godly bliss. During the 19th century Tantric writings were introduced to the west by British scholars and travelers, foremost among them Sir Richard Burton, translator of three classic texts that explain and illustrate the art of love with considerable emphasis on sexual lovemaking positions: the Kama Sutra and Ananga Ranga from India and the Perfumed Garden from Arabia. Not surprising given the surface prudery of the time, these works were greeted with a largely hostile reception. Tantric practices were condemned as “orgiastic rites too terrible for civilized men to hear”. Today, despite our more open attitudes to sexuality, much of this cult-like perception of Tantra persists. Partly this may be due to traditional Tantra’s highly ritualized religious aspects – worship and identification with particular gods and goddesses, and mystical signs, symbols and chanting. But perhaps an even bigger block is the absolute necessity of retaining your aroused sexual energy internally and the accompanying emphasis for men on not ejaculating. This directly challenges our culture’s sexual ideal of simultaneous genital orgasm. The practice of arresting your sexual fever and turning it in and upward rather than allowing it to flow out and down may seem abnormal and contrived; going against the laws of nature and our bodies. After all, the powerful release of a © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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“regular” orgasm feels so very good; why should anyone voluntarily pass this by for the promise of unknown ecstasy? However, a gradual shift away from a strong focus on semen retention to a slower approach of gently learning to move all that wild sexual energy around inside you, is part of the new sacred sex (or neo-Tantra) that’s been emerging in the last 20 years. Whole body orgasm, through eyes, elbows or toes, becomes a real possibility, not just our venerated Big O of the genitals. While learning to withhold ejaculation is part of the process there’s also a more relaxed, more fluid perspective that allows for personal preference and ability. You can take your time learning the delights that come with delaying or eliminating ejaculation as you explore the many other ingredients of sacred sex practice – emotional and mental as well as physical. Neo-tantra begins with much from her traditional parent – for example, the precept that sexual union can lead to transcendence, and specific techniques of breath and muscle control – and adds an assortment of other goodies. Jungian concepts, Reichian bodywork, acupressure, aromatherapy, creative visualization and dynamic meditation can all be part of the loose and joyous eclectic meld. The essential approach is spiritual, meaning nonreligious and non-dogmatic. And playfulness is woven into the fabric of loving – laughter and lust come hand in hand to the true lovers’ bed. But sacred sex goes far beyond the bedroom, helping partners open fully to each other in trust and love through all facets of their relationship. Your relationship itself becomes a vehicle for spiritual growth and personal awareness. As you learn to open to yourself, to your own inner lover, you naturally open to others around you. You © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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begin to understand that surrender does not mean submission or loss of self, but rather a loving expansion to something that is much greater than you are. Like most spiritual paths, sacred sex teaches a discipline of the mind and body. It does so in a context of celebration and letting go into the sensual aspects of living, so that sacred sex is a paradoxical combination of mastery and spontaneity. As a celebration of life, sacred sex teaches the importance of conscious awareness, of being totally “in” your actions. By focusing attention on your body and your mind, and what you’re doing with them, you become all around healthier. Your emotions become more stable and more real. Your mental capacity increases and your physical health improves as you discover that your body is indeed the temple of your soul.

Balancing Feminine (Yin) and Masculine (Yang) Energies

YIN

YANG

In both Taoist (China) and Tantric (India) traditions there are two opposite yet complementary forces at play in the universe, what the Taoists call Yin and Yang. Yin represents the feminine: cool, receptive, moist, and nourishing. Yang represents the masculine: active, dry, and fiery. Women are mostly yin, men are mostly yang—what © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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popular author John Grey calls Venus and Mars—but within each woman there is some masculine energy and within each man some feminine. Carl Jung called these forces animus and anima. In Tantric lovemaking, you share and thus strengthen and balance your masculine and feminine energies. The YabYum posture, is an extraordinarily effective, and pleasurable, position for exchanging and balancing sexual energy with your lover, as is the Lovers’ Scissors. Terminology Most Tantric sacred lovemaking texts substitute more poetic terms to refer to the male and female sexual anatomy. Penis is lingam. Vagina is yoni. There are hundreds of other terms commonly used, such as golden rod, wand of light, jade stalk, tangled garden, honey pot and secret cave. Using such terminology is generally perceived to be more respectful, sensual and romantic. Certainly the language commonly heard on the streets such as cock and cunt, seems by comparison crude and disrespectful. Genital Sizes – Mix and Match The Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana classifies the lingam and yoni according to size. Male – Lingam: Hare (small) – Bull (medium) – Horse (large) Female – Yoni: Deer (small) – Mare (medium) – Elephant (large) According to Vatsyayana (and common sense) matches of equal size are ideal, but lovers can manage the other © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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combinations quite nicely. Certain positions are helpful when there is a mismatch of genital sizes. When the lingam is small and the yoni large try the following positions. • Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – legs over shoulders) - allows for maximum penetration • Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation – “Sidesaddle”) – allows for the skillful use of PC squeezing by the woman • Opposites – “Backslide” – provides an ideal angle for stimulation of the G-Spot When the lingam is large and the yoni is small try the following positions. • Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – man supports his weight off the woman) – allows for holding back from maximum penetration • Woman on Top – “Tender Surrender” (variation – lying face to face) – the lady is in charge of penetration and thrusting • Face to Face – “One Crutch” – allows for holding back from maximum penetration • Sideways – “The Lover’s Scissors” – penetration is not deep and thrusting is relaxed • Other Positions – Pregnancy – “The Cradle” (variation II) – shallow penetration and relaxed thrusting

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Tantra & Kama Sutra Sex Positions Man on Top The person who is on top during active lovemaking generates the most energy, which is passed to the partner on the bottom. Take turns sending and receiving by switching top and bottom throughout your sacred loving. If one of you is tired, or recovering from an illness or injury, then spend most of your time underneath. Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – knees up)

“It is a gentle forward stroke which may be varied for depth and speed, allowing a subtlety, rhythm and spontaneity.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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The classic “missionary” position and its many variations is the most common lovemaking position. Generally the woman lies flat on her back with the man on top of her. Variations include the woman raising one or both knees or lifting one or both legs high into the air. She may also raise her legs and hook them over her lover’s shoulders. The man may lie with his full weight on her or he may prop his body up with one or both arms. When he raises his body this way it allows for both lovers to caress and fondle other body parts during intercourse. For example the man may fondle or suck the woman’s breasts, or he may reach down to stimulate her clitoris while intercourse continues. The woman may fondle the man’s nipples, tickle and scratch him, and so on. You may explore kissing during this position, or harmonize your breath and gaze into each other’s eyes—all are methods for circulating hot sexual energy between you.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – legs over shoulders)

“She draws her limbs together, clasping her knees tightly to her breasts, her yoni, like an opening bud, offered up for pleasure.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

In this variation with her legs over your shoulders she presents her yoni fully ripe and open for maximum penetration. Depending upon size the penis may reach all the way to her cervix at the back of her vaginal canal, which can be very erotically stimulating for her if the lingam just teasingly touches her cervix. However, this position is not recommended if the lingam is large and the yoni is small because it may be painful for the woman if the man pushes too hard against her cervix. This position is highly effective when the lingam is small and the yoni large. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – man standing)

“With raised thighs, her feet placed either side of your waist; linga enters yoni; you rain hard blows upon her body.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

In this “missionary” variation with the man standing, the pumping action can be particularly vigorous. This is most suitable when the couple has already generated considerable erotic passion, when both lovers desire a harder, animal approach rather than a more still, quiet and spiritual one. Don’t misunderstand, we suggest that hard fucking can be as holy as any meditation. We invite God and Goddess into our bed when we are ‘fucking each © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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other’s brains out’ as well as when we are joined in a prayerful meditative posture, for example in one of the variations of the YabYum positions illustrated below. Your intention is what makes your sex spiritual, not the position or activity you are engaged in.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Man on Top – “Missionary” (variation – man supports his weight off the woman)

In the “missionary position” when the man supports his weight off the woman’s body with one arm, there is room for him to reach her clitoris with his free hand. She will benefit from the simultaneous thrusting action of intercourse and skilled manipulation of her deliciously sensitive clitoris. Many women report that they can experience deep vaginal orgasms with this technique, while many men report that they can last longer without ejaculating because they are focusing most of their attention on pleasing their female partner instead of focusing on their own genital stimulation. This position works wonders when the lingam is large and the yoni is small.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Tantra & Kama Sutra Sex Positions

Woman on Top Woman on Top – “Tender Surrender” (variation – lying face to face)

“She climbs upon you, the flowers dropping from her tousled hair, her giggles turning to gasps; every time she bends to kiss your lips her nipples pierce your chest.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

Both men and women may have difficulty opening their hearts and allowing themselves to be emotionally vulnerable and transparent, but heart opening seems most challenging for men. In this woman-on-top position the man must surrender to his lady, making himself vulnerable to her. Once you understand that control is the enemy of ecstasy, you may begin to appreciate the benefits of complete surrender to one another in lovemaking. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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When the lady is on top, she gives more energy than she takes. This is particularly beneficial if the man is recovering from an illness or injury or is in need of rest. In the variation shown here, the lovers are able to harmonize their breath while they gaze lovingly into each other’s eyes. A combination of harmonized breathing and eye gazing is one of the easiest ways for lovers to circulate their hot sexual energy. This position is also very effective when the lingam is large and the yoni is small as the lady is in charge of penetration and thrusting.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation – full front saddle ride)

“She now swings her hips in wide circles and makes figures-of-eight, swaying upon your body as though she were riding on a seesaw.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation – full front saddle ride)

“If long lovemaking exhausts you before your lover has reached her orgasm, you should allow her to roll you over on your back and sit astride you, taking initiative.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

The lover on top is in a dominant position. It is most desirable that in Tantric sacred lovemaking the man and woman take turns initiating and receiving. In relationships where one or the other partner is particularly dominant, an excellent way to “give up the lead” is to allow the lover who is normally less active and more passive, to assume the top position (at least sometimes).

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation - partial side-saddle ride)

“She cups and lifts her buttocks with her palms, spreads wide her thighs, and digs in her heels besides her hips, while you caress her breasts.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

This position is particularly desirable if the woman has a small yoni and the man has a large lingam. Also, because the woman is on top she can select exactly the right depth, speed and angle of penetration, giving maximum stimulation to her G-Spot, which can bring about deep vaginal or ejaculatory orgasms.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation – “Sidesaddle”)

“She uses the Mare's Trick, gripping your penis with her yoni's vice, squeezing and stroking it, holding it inside her for a hundred heartbeats. Drawing up her feet, she revolves her hips so that your penis circles deep within her yoni, you arching your body to help her.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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This position is excellent when the lingam is small and the yoni is large, particularly if the lady’s PC muscles are well toned and capable of gripping her lover’s lingam tightly.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “Sleeping Dragon”

“When her passion has ebbed, she should rest, bending forward to lay her forehead upon yours without disturbing your yoked bodies: it won't be long before desire stirs again.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

This woman-on-top position allows both lovers to rest between rounds of more active lovemaking. As the lovers lie still it is the perfect time to whisper adoring words into each other’s ears, or dissolve into the ecstasy of silence. In Tantric sacred loving over a period of hours, lovers build to one peak of sexual arousal, rest, resume more active lovemaking that builds to another peak of sexual arousal, rest again, and so on. By building to multiple peaks of sexual arousal (six, nine, a dozen or more), lovers accumulate an intense charge of hot sexual energy, which © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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they circulate through their individual bodies and back and forth between each other.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “Crouching Tigress” (variation – “Grasshopper”)

“Sitting erect, grip your lover's waist and pull her on to you, your loins continuously leaping together with a sound like the flapping of elephants' ears.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

The outline of the lovers in this position resembles the shape of a grasshopper. Use it most effectively when you have built to an intense energy charge and wish to come together, allowing the joyful experience of mutual orgasm. The man may or may not ejaculate, as is his desire, if he has learned the mastery necessary to separate his orgasm from ejaculation.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “The Queen’s Ecstasy”

The lady, having positioned herself perfectly, moving at exactly the correct speed, settling upon her lover to the perfect depth of penetration and angle, squirts her juicy nectar upon the wand of light offered so obligingly by her warrior of love.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “Slipslide”

“As her hips begin to churn, her head, flung back, bobs ever faster; she scratches, pummels you with small fists, fastens her teeth in your neck, doing unto you what you've often done unto her.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

The lovers have moved quickly in a swoon of uncontrollable passion joining their flesh together in the dance of love. Not having taken even enough time to disrobe completely, they ravish each other’s eager bodies. The lady overwhelmed with her lusty desire, comes instantly with the first penetration and goes on to build from one amazing orgasmic rush, each more intense than the last, until she falls forward, exhausted, but with her consciousness flying free of any limitations of the physical © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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body. From this vantage point her soul essence merges with that of her lover, transcending any boundaries that formerly separated them.

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “Water Saddle”

“Within the cave of her thighs you sit rotating your hips like a black bee.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

In a sacred bathing ritual the lovers, preparing for the coming hours of adoring devotion to each other as god and goddess, wash away all the cares of the world. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Woman on Top – “Backsaddle”

“Like a mare cruelly gripping a stallion, your lover traps and milks your penis with her vagina, which can only be perfected with long practice. When she uses it, a woman should cease to kiss her lover and simply hold the lock.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

Positions in which parts of the lover’s bodies are paired with their opposites will build sexual excitement and emotional passion very quickly. In this “backsaddle” position the lady straddles her man, facing his feet. A wonderfully erotic variation is when she leans forward far enough to suck on his toes while she rides her loving stallion bareback. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Face to Face Face to face positions with similar body parts facing or touching (mouths kissing, hearts together, hands linked) encourage emotional union and circulation of hot sexual energy. In these positions the sexual/spiritual energy builds more slowly, compared with positions that bring together opposite parts of the body. Use face to face positions when you want to open your hearts to deep connection, or when you wish to focus attention on circulating hot sexual energy between you, rather than continue to build to a higher sexual charge. Face to Face – “Grasshopper” (variation - sitting)

“Sitting face to face in bed, her breasts pressed tight against your chest, let each of you lock heels behind the other's waist, and lean back clasping one another's wrists.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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“God and Goddes, Father in heaven, Mother of Earth, won’t you please join with us in our loving embrace? Bless us with your presence, your light and your love. We honor you by joining together in ecstatic union. We surrender our hearts to each other and our souls to you Creators of all kind, beautiful and innocent things.”

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Face to Face – “Happy Capture”

“Indrani draws up both her knees until they nuzzle the curves of her breasts; her feet find her lover's armpits.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

“Have your way with me, my lord. My heart belongs to you. My body is for your pleasure. Fill me with your wand of light. Transport me to heaven with your touch.”

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Face to Face – “Heaven and Earth”

“She lies flat on her back, you sit between her parted knees, raise them, hook her feet over your thighs, catch hold of her breasts, and enjoy her.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

In this position the man reaches up to Heaven with his expanded masculine consciousness, and the woman touches the Earth with her feminine heart emotionally wide open. Heaven and Earth, body and soul, thought and emotion, masculine and feminine, Yin and Yang merge in union to become one.

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Face to Face – “The Lift”

In this face-to-face position the warrior of love can penetrate his lady’s ripe mango yoni with in-out strokes, rotating movements, or deep/shallow thrusting. Alternatively with “the lift” (as with positions where the lady sits upon the man’s lingam), he can use his upper body strength to move her about on his erection (so that neither lover is actually moving their hips in a thrusting action).

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Face to Face – “The Lift” (variation – full)

With the angle of penetration possible in the “full lift” position, the man can properly stimulate her G-Spot with his penetration. To extend the time spent in this position add one or several pillows under the lady’s hips. The GSpot is located one or two inches on the upper wall inside the vaginal canal. If you were looking at the yoni as if it were a clock, the G-Spot is located between the 11:00 and 1:00 positions. Remember that the G-Spot does not welcome stimulation until the lady is very highly aroused and has come very close to or has actually experienced a clitoral orgasm.

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Face to Face – “One Crutch”

The crutch position is excellent for rubbing the lingam directly against the clitoris, while at the same time penetration may caress the G-spot for a double delight. This position is good when the lingam is small and the yoni is large.

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Face to Face – “Two Crutches”

“Catch hold of her two feet, raising them till they press upon her breasts and her legs form a rough circle. Clasp her neck and make love to her.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

This position is suitable for penetration of either the yoni or the fully surrendered back door. Both juicy caves welcome their lord’s loving attention.

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Sideways Sideways positions are generally well suited to circulating and sharing sexual / spiritual energy between lovers. These positions tend to be gentler, slower, and quieter. Although perhaps less stimulating than other positions, such as opposites, they can be powerfully emotional. Many lovers find that they feel their hot sexual energy moving most easily during times of relative stillness. When the heart opens, energy moves freely from the lower chakra centers in the genitals, belly, and solar plexus through it to the higher chakra centers in the throat, third eye, and crown. You may discover that simply opening your heart accomplishes what sexual technique alone could never do—cleansing your doors of perception, accelerating your consciousness, and preparing you for the gift of ecstasy. Sideways – “Spoons”

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This wonderful posture allows you to rest after an exhausting dance of love. In it lovers may sleep peacefully through the remainder of the long night, gently turning together from side to side. Intercourse while in the spoons position is perfect when the man is larger than the woman, as penetration is not as deep and thrusting not as fierce. It is especially suited for lovemaking during pregnancy as there is no weight or pressure upon the new life growing in the lady’s womb. If either partner is recovering from injury, illness or exhaustion, this posture is also ideal.

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Sideways – “The Lovers’ Scissors”

“Her limbs, entwined in yours like tendrils of fragrant jasmine creeper, draw taut and slowly relax in the gentle rhythm of linga and yoni.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

The “lovers’ scissors” is our morning meditation together, but you can do it at any time of day or as a meditation at bedtime. We sleep nude, usually curled up like spoons, and immediately upon waking assume this loving posture, holding it for anywhere from 5-30 minutes depending upon how much time we have. Used in this way, the “lover’s scissors” is not actually considered a sexual position, but rather a loving energy meditation. Although there is genital connection, this meditation is not intercourse for sexual arousal—there is no active thrusting or drive to complete an orgasm. It is for balancing your masculine and feminine energies and connecting emotionally and spiritually with your lover.

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Experiment with doing this every day for several weeks and then not doing it for a few days. You will notice that its effects are cumulative, important and powerful. When you do the exercise daily, you will relate to each other more respectfully, appreciatively, and lovingly. You will also have greater personal resilience and resources for dealing with all the stresses and challenges of living. When we do this regularly, we are calm and loving toward each other. When we skip it for a while (more than 4 days in a row) we can start to get antsy and even a little snarly with each other!

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Lover’s Scissors Meditation Instructions •

• • • • • • •

The man lies on his side and the woman on her back. The woman’s leg closest to her lover goes over top of his hip. Her other leg goes between his legs. This is the “scissors”. You are at a 90-degree angle to each other. Your heads are apart and your genitals are connected. Slide penis into vagina. Soft entry works fine—use saliva or lubricant as needed. The key is to be able to stay relaxed, connected, comfortable and still. Breathe slowly and deeply—harmonize your breathing, if you wish look into each other’s eyes. Place your hands on each other’s heart. Simply allow yourself to BE in the experience. Be silent. If you drift off into sleep that is fine, but do not allow your mind to intrude with thoughts unrelated to your loving connection.

When you have some experience working with your sexual energy, add these more advanced elements to your connection • Focus on the energy connection between you, extending out from your genitals. • You may occasionally tighten your PC muscles to help focus your attention on your genitals and to move energy up from them. • Bring energy from your genitals up to your heart. • Allow your heart to open to your lover. • Allow energy to flow from your heart to the top of your head then down to your eyes and through your eyes into your lover.

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•

Direct energy that comes from your lover in through your eyes down to your genitals. • Or, put it in your belly chakra for later use. • Or, send it to whatever part of your body may need healing. If you become “spaced out”, anxious or hyperactive, because you have accumulated a high-energy charge do grounding.

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Grounding Exercise Grounding is a very effective process for calming and stabilizing. Grounding connects you with the earth, carrying overpowering negative energies down and away much like a lightning rod. There are many methods for grounding. Try this one daily, as often as you think of it. Even if you don’t “feel” anything while you are doing it notice the difference grounding makes to your overall sense of well-being. Grounding is also an excellent practice whenever you are feeling sexually “wound-up”: • • •

Sitting or standing, with your body relaxed, take a slow breath in through your nose. Gently exhale through your mouth. Focus your attention on the top of your head (your crown chakra).

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• • • •

•

•

•

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Picture a funnel on the top of your head through which vital energy from the cosmos flows into your body—this is powerful, masculine, active energy. As this sun and sky energy travels down through your body it gives you strength and vitality. As it passes it also gathers up any negative energies you may be feeling—anger, lethargy, hyperactivity, grief, anxiety, fear. Now focus your attention on your genitals (your root chakra) and picture a funnel there—with the small end of the funnel inside your body and the mouth of the funnel pointing down to the earth. Allow the energy to flow through your lower funnel, away and down into the center of Mother Earth, taking with it all your tension; leaving vigor and calm in its wake. Continue to visualize energy flowing in through your head, down through your body and out into the earth—bringing vitality and serenity and taking away stress. Do this for a minimum of 3 minutes at a time.

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Sideways – “The Lovers’ Scissors”

For ending lovemaking while you still have desire, which means the man has not ejaculated, use the “lovers’ scissors” position. When a man ejaculates this usually ends the lovemaking, but if you end the lovemaking without a male ejaculation you must decide how and when to stop some other way. When we join in this position it allows our passion and hot sexual energy to subside naturally and comfortably, so that we can drift off to sleep, or after a timely interval, get up and resume activities for household or work. This position is also excellent when the lingam is large and the yoni is small.

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Sideways – “The Lover’s Scissors”

Assuming the “lovers’ scissors” position immediately upon awakening, may require a “soft entry” if the man does not have a firm erection. Soft entry means the man or woman inserts the relatively soft penis into the vagina using their hands. First wet the penis and vagina with saliva (which is very slippery) or a lubricant (preferably water-based or silicone-based). If there are no erectile dysfunction issues, the man will usually gain a partial or full erection very quickly once soft entry is accomplished.

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Sideways – “The Lovers’ Scissors”

Normally when we are using the “lovers’ scissors” position as a morning energy connection meditation, we do not progress to more active lovemaking with kissing, thrusting, switching into other lovemaking positions, etc. But sometimes the passion and hot sexual energy build in such a way that our lovemaking becomes more active and leads on to mutual orgasms. Both options are sublime.

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Tantra & Kama Sutra Sex Positions

Sitting The classic Tantric lovemaking position is the YabYum (father / mother; yin / yang) position. We sometimes refer to it as the yum-yum position. Use it for moving and exchanging sexual energy when you are at a peak of sexual arousal and want to ride the wave of bliss rather than to continue building more hot sexual energy or end the lovemaking with the man ejaculating.

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“YabYum” (variation – classic lotus)

The man sits cross-legged, in the lotus position, with his partner on top of his lap. You may support his thighs and back with pillows. When you are ready to resume more active lovemaking, you can easily roll from this position into man or woman on top or face-to-face on your sides while still maintaining your genital connection.

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“YabYum” (variation - kneeling)

If the man is not comfortable in the lotus position supporting the full weight of his goddess, the woman may kneel on him supporting some of her own weight with her thighs. It is important that you find a variation that you can maintain comfortably for as long as you would like.

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“YabYum” (variation – sitting in a chair)

If the lotus position is too difficult, the man may sit on the edge of the bed or on a straight-backed chair with his legs out in front of him and feet on the floor. Once you are snugly connected, be still, look into each other's eyes, harmonize your breathing, connect your mouths and tongues with a kiss, or touch third eye points.

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“YabYum” (variation – “see saw”)

Your attention at this point is on working with the life force energy that has been built up during active lovemaking. Do some PC squeezing (Kegels) to help you circulate the hot sexual energy away from your genitals up through your body through the higher chakra centers. Try to exchange your sexual / spiritual energy with your lover, and ultimately use it to make a direct connection with the Divine.

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“YabYum” (variation – “full see saw”)

Experiment with making sound at each chakra point, chanting or "toning" together to focus the energy. You will be amazed at how beautiful the sound is when you are working with such a high sexual charge of life force energy.

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“YabYum” (variation - kneeling)

Hands help to concentrate and circulate the energy as well. Place your left hand at the base of her spine and your right hand on her back at the heart center. Alternatively, place your left hand at the base of his spine and with your right press the “Wind Mansion” acupoints at the junction of skull and neck. Another variation is to run your hands in flowing motions up his spine. Experiment! Recommended reading: Acupressure for Lovers: Secrets of Touch for Increasing Intimacy, by Michael Reed Gach © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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“YabYum” ( variation - kneeling)

When your sexual excitement begins to subside, speed up your breathing and undulate your bodies to build the charge again and move it up. Even with rapid rocking and breathing, there is little actual thrusting happening so the man is able to last longer. Some delightful yoni squeezing will help him to maintain an erection without going over into ejaculation.

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“YabYum” ( variation – sitting in a chair)

Some lovers also enjoy the YabYum position as a way to tune into each other early on in their lovemaking. Then they return to it when the sexual charge is high.

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Standing Standing positions are not usually held for long periods of time because of the physical strength required. They are ideal for lovemaking “quickies” including when you are being discretely naughty in some semi-public place such as a washroom at an art gallery. Standing – “Climbing the Tree”

“You catch one of her knees firmly in your hand and stand making love with her while her hands explore and caress your body.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

When passion flares, back her against a wall, lift one or both legs and ravish her. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Standing – “Clinging To The Tree”

“As you lean against the wall, your lady twines her thighs around yours, locks her feet to your knees, and clasps your neck, making love very passionately.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

We are sometimes asked, “Is there such a thing as a Tantra quickie?” Of course there is, but the man does not usually © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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ejaculate, so the quickie is a prelude to more extended lovemaking later. No couple can find several hours every time they make love, but be sure that quickies are not your usual approach to sex or it will get boring and predictable.

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Opposites Postures that combine opposites (rear entry, head to feet, mouth to groin) build erotic excitement and generate a high sexual charge rapidly. All opposite positions are useful for any man with difficulty getting and maintaining an erection, because they are so arousing. All opposite positions are to be avoided by the man who ejaculates prematurely. Opposites – “Dog”

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“If the lady, eager for love, goes on all fours, lays breasts, arms and forehead to the carpet, raising her buttocks high, and you guide your penis into her yoni humping her back like a doe, and you enjoy her from behind, rutting as though you'd lost all human nature…” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

© 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Opposites – “Dog”

“Doggie Style” is probably the most common rear entry position. In the “dog” position penetration can be into the yoni or into the anus, as the lovers desire.

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Opposites – “Dog” (variation – pulling on the reins)

“She draws up her knees and you clamp yours about her raised thighs, trapping them in a tight knot while riding saddle upon her buttocks and kissing her.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

Many a lady will swoon, if her passion is already very high, when you whisper in her ear, “All your holes are mine”. For anal penetration be sure to use a condom to protect your wand of light from bacterial infection. Of course you know to also use lots of lubricant, and tease her back door open with your gentlest coaxing manner.

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Opposites – “Backslide”

“You lie flat on your back with legs stretched out and your lover sits astride you, facing away and grasping your feet.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

Rear entry positions generally, and this variation in particular, build hot sexual energy very rapidly, especially for the man. With the lady facing away from you, the angle is just right to provide strong stimulation to the frenulum. The glans is the smooth head of the penis. The corona is the ring around the glans. The frenulum is that puffy patch of skin just below the corona, located on the underside of the penis. If the penis were hanging down, the frenulum would be in contact with the testicular sac. Because of the extreme sensitivity of the frenulum, this is not a good position if the man usually ejaculates quickly, but is perfect © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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if the man wants to ejaculate, but has trouble doing so in other intercourse positions. This position is excellent when the lingam is small and the yoni is large.

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Opposites – “See Saw”

“Because you have been such a good boy, I am going to milk your goldenrod in such a teasing delightful way that you will beg me for mercy.”

There are rings of muscles going from the opening of the yoni to the cervix at the back of the vaginal canal. If the lady is highly skilled in the art of love, she will be able to individually contract each of these rings, going back and forth. When the lingam is inside while she performs these wondrous squeezes, it is known as “riding the elevator”. It is the best elevator!

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Opposites – “Gorilla” – (variation – pulling on the reins)

“She bends well forward and grips the bedstead, her buttocks raised high; cup your hands to serpents' hoods and squeeze her jar-shaped breasts together.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

One of the most popular positions for a quickie is to bend your lady over the back of a chair or to lean her onto the edge of a table or bed and take her in full ripeness.

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When the testosterone is raging, it is a rare man who does not fantasize tearing the clothes off his lady, bending her over and taking her in an instant. The superior man will not ejaculate when he does this, so that he can continue on in other positions, to make sure his goddess gets her own satisfaction.

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Opposites – “Gorilla” (variation – masked)

“My lady, I can’t wait another instant. I must have you now, I need you soooo bad. I need to be inside you now.”

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Other Positions – Pregnancy Lovemaking is perfectly normal, and in fact highly desirable during pregnancy, but as the pregnancy enters the last trimester, special care must be taken to avoid pressing weight upon the mother’s belly. There are many intercourse positions that honor this condition. Other Positions – Pregnancy – “The Cradle”(variation – “L”)

“Lying on her side, facing away, the fawn-eyed girl offers you her buttocks and your penis penetrates the house of love.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

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“My darling, this loving energy we create will nourish the new being growing so securely in your womb of life. Dear God and Goddess, as we honor Thee, please bless our child.”

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Other Positions – Pregnancy – “The Cradle” (variation II)

“Rock-a-bye baby, the cradle will rock…” This position is excellent when the lingam is large and the yoni is small.

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Other Positions – Pregnancy – “The Cradle” (variation)

In this position the man can lovingly caress his lady’s breasts and genitals helping her manually to come if she has difficulty reaching orgasm through intercourse alone.

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Other Positions – Pregnancy – “Happy Capture” (variation – “T”)

This position completely respects the need to avoid weight on the pregnant lady’s belly, while allowing for fairly deep penetration. Also, as with the previous position, the man can lovingly caress his lady’s breasts and genitals helping her manually to come if she has difficulty having orgasms through intercourse alone.

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Shallow-Deep Thrusting Technique A superb thrusting technique that brings great pleasure to a woman and helps a man to last is a combination of deep and shallow thrusts. By shallow thrusts we mean your penis only enters 11/2 to 2 inches inside your partner. This first couple of inches is the most sensitive part of a woman's vagina. Deep thrusts mean your penis enters as fully as you can. In this technique you combine a series of nine fairly quick shallow thrusts with one slow deep one. The shallow thrusts stimulate your partner's most sensitive vaginal tissues and at the same time create a vacuum effect that makes her ache for the deep thrust to come. And because most of your thrusts are shallow ones, exciting only the first few inches of your penis, you're able to rock on for much longer! With your attention fully engaged in this way - on your partner, your breath, your genital muscles -you are going to last a long time. As your lovemaking goes on, and on, and on... perhaps for hours, the energy within you and between you and your lover will accumulate to such an intense level that you may spontaneously experience the opening of your higher "spiritual" centers. With this © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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opening comes an experience of ecstasy, bliss, joy, and wonder. This is where mastery of ejaculation can lead you and your satisfied partner.

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Foreplay “One of the most wonderful things about latter life lovemaking is that foreplay can last up to a month.” Loving Life After 60: Celebrating the Autumn of Your Life by Tom Paugh

Surveys have shown that typical lovemaking lasts under thirty minutes from start to finish, in virtually every country around the planet. Tantric lovers, on the other hand, extend lovemaking over a period of hours. Extending lovemaking not only increases your pleasure, but also allows for a proper appreciation and honoring of the gender differences between the warriors of love. It usually takes a woman much longer than a man to come to full sexual arousal. Unfortunately lovemaking that finishes in less than thirty minutes may leave the lady frustrated and dissatisfied with her experience. Taking lots of time with foreplay is therefore an important part of Tantric lovemaking. You might consider foreplay to include everything leading up to intercourse. Don’t make the error of judgment in believing that foreplay is somehow second best to intercourse. When you are fully present in the now moment, and if you are connecting emotionally and energetically, every touch, every glance of the eyes, and every breath is as erotic, intense and satisfying as an actual orgasm.

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Conversation with wine

One of the most important gender differences between men and women is that generally men open their hearts after sexual intercourse, but women are not eager for sexual intercourse until after their hearts are opened. One way to make the emotional connection that will open your hearts is to share flirtatious, playful conversation over a glass of wine.

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Conversation with wine

“No two women make love quite the same way, so orchestrate your rhythms to the moods and colors of each lover's "raga" (emotions).” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

There is a long tradition in Tantric ritual of using wine, cannabis and other herbal aphrodisiacs to stimulate libido and enhance sexual performance. Beware—moderation is best—more is not necessarily better when it comes to alcohol and drugs.

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Dancing

Lighten up! Fun, playful activities such as dancing set a sensuous mood for sacred loving. If you ever feel stuck, not knowing what to do next during your hours of sacred love play, the natural thing to do is touch your bodies together and dancing is the perfect way to do that. It will get you out of your head and into your body. Then before you know it, you are back in the throes of passion again, absorbed in the glorious now moment.

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Kissing

Take note: All men with erectile dysfunction—kissing is one of the fastest, surest ways to arouse a man to a mighty erection. It also happens to be many a lady’s favorite foreplay. And of course it is most highly desirable to extend passionate kissing during and after intercourse.

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Undressing

Dressing and undressing is one of the most delightful forms of love play. There is an extremely sexy scene in the movie “Don’t Look Now” staring Donald Sutherland and Julie Christie in which the lovers put their clothes on rather than take them off. We highly recommend that you change outfits several times over hours of Tantric sacred lovemaking. Clothes suited for a romantic dinner at home for just the two of you would be different from those you might wear giving your lover a massage, or for dancing, etc.

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Undressing

Sexy lingerie is a great delight for the eye of almost any male lover. Men are generally more visually cued to states of sexual arousal than women. Partial nudity can sometimes be much more exciting than full nudity during foreplay. Don’t be in too big a hurry to get all your clothes off!

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Dressing Up

Once you get your clothes off, don’t assume you have to keep them off! Be creative and imaginative in your changing of clothes as your love play progresses. A beautiful cloth remnant can be as sexy and alluring as any tailored garment. Be daring and wear each other’s clothes for a change—bring out your hidden feminine and masculine.

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Dressing Up

Masks add a taste of mystery to your sexy loving time. When you put on a simple mask, you can take off the one you wear every day and explore the depths of your shadows together. Masks can be extremely erotic, sexually arousing, tantalizing, mysterious, playful and sometimes dark.

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Lotions, creams and powders

Have available an interesting assortment of perfumes (for men and women)—some with pheromones added, creams and lotions, essential oils, massage oils, edible lubricants, as well as oil, water and silicone lubricants. Apply them while your lover watches or apply them to each other.

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More Exotic Practices Loving Body Discovery

One of the exercises from our Tantra weekend for couples is the “loving body discovery”. In this exercise lovers take turns exploring each other’s bodies, from head to toe and everywhere in-between. When you are exploring, you start from the outside (hands, feet, ears, etc.) and work your way in toward the hot spots (breasts and genitals), always moving very, very slowly. When you think you are going slow enough, go even slower than that!

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Loving Body Discovery

The loving body discovery is not a massage, nor is it an attempt to build sexual excitement. Rather, the idea is to explore “as if for the very first time” touching, smelling, and tasting your lover, inch by lovely inch. Of course, your lover may become aroused during your exploration, but that is not your objective.

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Loving Body Discovery

The loving body exploration can easily last several hours and is something to do many times, not just once. Afterwards, share what new and delightful things you discovered about each other during the exercise, for example—marks, lines, textures, scents, sensitivities, your pleasure, your appreciation, etc.

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Loving Body Discovery

One problem that couples report to us in our Tantra workshops is performance anxiety. People quite understandably want to be great lovers. They want to make something wonderful happen for their partner. Goal orientation may creep in and take over, becoming a focus on getting to orgasm. This can rob you of the delights, pleasures and beauty of each touch, each breath, or each glance of the eye. In Tantric sacred loving there is no goal, but there is a purpose—union between the lovers. The loving body discovery is a most excellent exercise to help discover the joys of loving without having to get to orgasm, to be free of the requirement to perform in a certain way. On the contrary, both the one exploring and the one being explored will discover many new and wondrous things. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Loving Body Discovery

“Kneeling between her thighs, tickle her breasts and under her arms, call her 'my lovely darling' and print deep nailmarks around her nipples.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

In the “loving body discovery” exercise, we usually suggest that you do NOT proceed on to intercourse and orgasm. In this way, you can experience what it is like to make love without trying to get anywhere, without having the possibly frustrating experience of wanting an orgasm but not getting one. Ironically, when they remove orgasm as a goal, many lovers report having lots more orgasms. Here surrender and letting go are much more useful—control does not help at all. Remember, control is the enemy of ecstasy. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Loving Body Discovery

A common complaint we hear from women, is that their male lovers go almost immediately for the hot spots— breasts and genitals. We refer to this as the bulls-eye syndrome. The loving body discovery is an excellent antidote to the bulls-eye syndrome because you don’t approach the breasts and genitals until well into the exercise. Ladies, bear in mind that men are animals—they can be trained easily! Remember Pavlov’s dogs? The dogs learned to salivate at the sound of the bell once they associated the bell with food as a conditioned response. Men go quickly for the genitals because they get a great big response there. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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If you want your man to stay at another spot on your beautiful body for a long time and to go to that spot early in your lovemaking, give him a big response when he is there. For example, move your body and make appreciative sounds when he is nibbling on your neck, whispering in your ears, or sucking your lovely toes.

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Loving Body Discovery

“Catching your penis, the lady with dark eyes like upturned lotus petals guides it into her yoni, clings to you and shakes her buttocks.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

When finally you do reach the hot spots, remember that you are exploring with all of your senses. You are not trying to arouse your partner sexually (although this may well happen). You are not building with the idea of going on to intercourse. You are not trying to make your lover come. You are not trying to get to orgasm. The loving body discovery mercifully lets both of you off the “performance hook”.

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Loving Body Discovery - Eating Out

You may introduce some playfully creative variations into your loving body discovery. Dress your lover up like an ice-cream sundae and dive in for an erotic snack. This gives a whole new meaning to “eating out”. Dessert was never so good.

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Massage

Massage is one of the easiest and surest ways to disconnect from the many demands of a busy life and to connect with your lover. You can give your lover a full-body massage in under 7 minutes. This will get you both out of your heads and into your bodies. Ecstasy in lovemaking is not essentially a mental process; rather it requires that you pay attention to sensory information (sight, taste, touch, smell and kinesthetic sensations), any or all of which will get you into your body, fully present in the now moment.

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Massage

Any time one of the lovers is keen for lovemaking, but the other is too tired, try giving your partner a full body massage. This will sometimes awaken your lover’s sexual energy so that he becomes aroused and able to participate in more active lovemaking. Be sure not to use this offering of massage in a manipulative way, as a strategy for getting your partner to be interested in sex just because you are. Offer the massage as an unconditional gift, with no expectation of anything in return.

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Massage Tips Massages are easy to do as well as fun to give and receive. You do not have to have any training to give your mate a thoroughly satisfying massage, although if you would like more guidance there are some excellent books and videos available. Giving each other a massage as a first course of sexual play adds to your entire experience. Both partners are able to relax, leave the world behind, and be in the moment together. With massage, a woman’s body begins to awaken for arousal—her erotic side receives the time and attention she needs to “get in the mood”. A man whose body is relaxed so that his energy can flow more freely is able to last much longer. You can perform massages just about anywhere—bed, floor, couch—but most comfortable for the masseur is a table at about hip height. It is not likely you have a portable massage table at home, but you do have a kitchen or dining table. With firm cushions, a foam mat or even an air mattress on top covered by a sheet, they make great massage surfaces. If the kitchen or dining rooms do not afford you as much privacy as you would like, move the table into your bedroom. Give a dry massage—without oil, or a wet one—with oil. The market is flooded with wondrous lubricants—flavored, scented, unscented, edible, warming, tingling—take your pick. You can also make your own with a light vegetable oil, such as safflower, sunflower, jojoba, or canola-grape seed, and add your own essential oils to create a scent you prefer.

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This is Al’s refreshing, and lightly spicy recipe, for the massage oil we supply in our lover’s kits at our Tantra weekends. 4 oz. canola oil (or substitute as above) 4 drops YlangYlang essential oil 1-2 drops Black Pepper essential oil (1 in summer, 2 in winter) 1-2 drops Clary Sage essential oil (1 in winter, 2 in summer) Whichever products you choose for general body massage it is best to use water-based lubricants for massaging a woman’s genitals. Other lubricants may clog her pores and encourage vaginal infection.

Massage Strokes If you are unsure how to begin to give a massage there are a few simple strokes you can learn to master easily. There are some excellent massage videos you can learn from. • • •

• •

Long, smooth, firm strokes following the line of muscle up and down his body. Circular motions, especially at joints. Kneading—slowly and firmly squeezing muscle between fingers and palms of your hands, then letting go and repeating—particularly in large muscle groups like shoulders, back, buttocks and thighs. Feathering—very light fingertip strokes—primarily for erotic massage, the arousal of skin to skin contact. Rocking, with one hand on either side of your partner’s body, or a particular part of it, her buttocks for example, gently rock back and forth.

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You cannot go wrong by starting out with slow, gentle pressure in your strokes. Ask your partner to tell you if she would like more intensity as you go. The more massages you give each other the easier it will become to know what is needed through the messages your hands give you. Nevertheless, whenever you are receiving a massage communicate your desires and sensations with loving requests and appreciative sounds—give your masseur informative and thankful feedback.

Starting your massage An excellent starting point for a relaxing and invigorating massage is the back. • Begin at the base of his spine with your palms on his sacrum (just above his tailbone). • Inhale. • As you exhale slide your hands up his back on either side of his spine. • With a firm touch, follow the line of his shoulders out from his neck. • Slide your hands down the outer sides of his back, coming to rest again at the base of his spine. • Do it again and again and revel in his sighs of pleasure. • Move on to his buttocks or shoulders or neck or arms— wherever your hands feel compelled to go. If you are giving your lover a full body massage, make sure to cover every part of his body—ears, toes, eyes (very softly), fingers—not just the major sections like legs and back. His whole body has skin hunger.

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Massage Variations Seven Minute Massage It is a delicious treat to receive a full body massage that lasts any where from thirty minutes to a couple of hours, but you can also give your lover a boost with a massage “quickie”. You can effectively energize and loosen him up from top to toe in five to seven minutes. Try this in various situations: • • •

Near the beginning of your sacred loving time. As a refreshing pause from strenuous sexual activity. To start or end your day.

Up and Down Working a massage from the top to the bottom—starting at her head and shoulders and finishing at her feet, with most of your strokes in a downward motion—is generally relaxing, draining tension away and down. Working in the opposite direction—starting at her fee and finishing at her head with most of your strokes going up her body—can be extraordinarily enlivening as energy builds and moves upwards. Erotic Massage Primarily for arousal, erotic massage focuses, although not exclusively, on tantalizing skin-to-skin contact that becomes increasingly sexual as the massage continues. Using light, feathery touches begin moving inwards from the extremities of your lover’s body, for example from her toes, up her feet, to calves and thighs, stopping just short of her genitals, or her fingers to palms to inner elbows to armpits and almost to her nipples. Only slowly, as her body © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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awakens under your teasing touch do you move on to actually caress her hot sexual spots. With erotic massage you may use not only your hands but also your tongue, lips, hair or other exotic aids like feathers and even ice cubes. Add more spice with a blindfold or by loosely binding your lover’s wrists and ankles to the bed corners so she is at your tender mercy.

Not all massages are equal; some are more for relaxation and energetic revival, while others can be particularly erotic building high states of passion and sexual excitement. A simple blindfold will add a note of mystery to any erotic massage.

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Erotic Massage

A teasing, sensual, erotic massage is a wonderful gift to each other, as exciting and satisfying for the giver as the receiver. While your lover is blindfolded, entice him with mysterious sounds, scents, and sensations. Touch him all over with feathers, ice cubes, hot oil, silk cloth, and parts of yourself, of course. Appeal to all five senses in your tantalizing play.

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Sexual Fire Breath

The sexual fire breath is one of the best exercises, especially with a partner (but you can also do it alone), for rapidly building a hot sexual charge and moving it up through your body, helping to open all of your chakra centers. In the sexual fire breath you use a combination of sound, pelvic rocking, PC (pubococcygeous) muscle squeezes, deep abdominal breathing, visualization and hand movements.

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Sexual Fire Breath

The sexual fire breath is one of the meditations on Pala Copeland’s CD, Apertio: Tantra Energy Meditations, with lyrics and voice by Pala Copeland, and music by Jeff Davies. Use the sexual fire breath on your own to open yourself to your full exquisite sexual potential. Do it as a charger-upper before making love. Do it during lovemaking as you are being manually or orally stimulated. Do it during intercourse, but be very observant and ready to stop in a flash in the early learning stages or the man may go beyond his point of no return to ejaculate before you are both ready to end the lovemaking. If “energy” is very subtle for you and you don’t usually feel it, try this exercise. Most report really feeling something the very first time they do the sexual fire breath.

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Sexual Fire Breath • • • •

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Lie on your back. Feet flat on the floor/bed. Knees bent. Legs comfortably apart. Hands at your sides, palms up. Eyes closed. Begin to breathe slowly and deeply into your belly. Focus your attention on your genitals and visualize drawing breath in and out through them. When you have a comfortable breathing rhythm established, begin to rock your pelvis, tilting it up toward the sky. Use your feet to slightly push off the floor so that you are not using your abdominal muscles to rock and they can remain loose and open. Inhale as you rock back. Exhale as you rock forward. (Note: some bodies want to do it the opposite way – listen to yours and go with what feels right). Make sound as you exhale – AAAAAHHHH. (This is the most difficult part for many people but it helps enormously, sound carries the energy). When you are in a comfortable rhythm, add PC Pumping. Tighten your PC muscles as you rock back. Relax them as you rock forward. (Note: your body might want to do it the opposite way, let it.). Begin to visualize your sexual energy as a great ball of golden fire in your genitals. As you rock, breathe and pump draw the golden fireball up through your chakra centers, one chakra at a time. Send the energy out through your crown chakra into the universe. Do not leave it to build up in your head. If you are making love with a partner, you can also pass the energy to him through your eyes, your kiss, your breath.

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• • •

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Pass your hands in flowing motions up your body to help with the energy movement. Breathe more rapidly to move the energy higher within your body, allowing yourself to open into its flow. When you reach a high edge of energetic arousal you can maintain this level by deepening and slowing your breathing and keeping your body relaxed. Rest in stillness for a few moments when you are finished practicing so that the energy can continue to flow through you. Bring it back down and store it in your belly chakra for later use. If you have left a store of energy in your head and feel some congestion there do Grounding and apply firm pressure with your fingertips to your crown chakra.

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BDSM Play One of the most common fantasies for men and women is to be blindfolded and tied up. Milder forms of BDSM (bondage/discipline/sadism/masochism) play are entering into the bedrooms of the nation as cultural taboos against the healthy exploration of sexuality among consenting adults drops away. If you find your lovemaking has become predictable or routine, spice it up with a touch of BDSM play.

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Torture Teasing

Playful “torture” can lead to extraordinary orgasms.

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Blindfolds and tie-ups

Blindfolds and tie-ups are two of the most common forms of light BDSM sexual play.

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Sweet surrender my darling

Many lovers report that their BDSM explorations taught them a great deal about trust, so that they can surrender themselves utterly, becoming completely open and vulnerable. When this is done within a cocoon of love, the emotional, energetic and spiritual connections can be deep and profound.

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Dark Stranger

“Grasping the ankles of the round-hipped woman, whose buttocks are like two ripe gourds, raise her beautiful thighs and spread the thighjoints widely.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

“Yes master, have your way with me. Your command is my wish.”

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Paddle Play

“With lotus-feet set well-apart on the ground, she bends, placing a hand upon each thigh, and you take her from the rear…” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

“If I’m a bad girl, will you promise to spank me master?” There is a great deal of misinformation and misunderstanding about what BDSM is and what it means. Modern Tantric lovers are experimenting with BDSM play within a context of trust, surrender, love, and a willingness to explore mysteries of the shadow. In the darkest corners of the shadow, BDSM can include overt domination, submission, cruelty and pain, but for most Tantric lovers these aspects are not present.

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Dominatrix

“My darling, you are now at my mercy. You must obey my commands. Do exactly as I tell you or face your deserved punishment. Of course the punishment must fit the crime. You are going to like this!”

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Golden Showers

Many men become extremely aroused when their goddess delivers warm golden urine or honey cum onto their body. Perhaps a perfect punishment for disobeying your commands could be to female ejaculate onto his eager face while he dines between your luscious silken thighs at your gate to heaven. Gentlemen, lick, lap and love it! Recommended Reading Biological Transmutations and their applications in: Chemistry, Physics, Biology, Ecology, Medicine, Nutrition, Agronomy, Geology, by Louis C. Kervran “Biological transmutation is the process through which a live organism, in certain conditions, activates nuclear reactions that lead to © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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the transformation of a chemical element in another chemical element. Biological transmutation releases slowly significant quantities of energy. Sperm, in men's case and sexual fluids in women's case, can be transformed into energy. This takes place inside the body. So this energy is huge and it remains in our body on different levels, giving us multiple advantages.”

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Here is a list of rules from a dominatrix web site. 1. A SESSION begins with you undressing, and you handing me my tribute. If I have to ask for it, you will be punished. 2. The fastening of a black leather collar around your neck will mark the beginning of the session. 3. You must always ask permission before you do or say anything. PERIOD! 4. You must always use the proper form of address when speaking to me. You will say, "Mistress, may I speak?" 5. You are never to say "No" to me when I tell you to do something. No matter how uncomfortable or embarrassed you may feel. If I think you are unable to perform my request, I will ask you to stop. 6. When you sit, you must never cross your legs or keep your knees together. You must always have your legs open so you will be totally exposed every time I look at you. If you fail to do this you will be disciplined. 7. Your "Safe Word" is "RED". Do not hesitate to use this word if you find yourself in an unbearable situation. I will stop everything and we will talk. Here are some products frequently used in light BDSM play, such as restraints, whips, paddles, ticklers, and blindfolds.

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Beginner BDSM Kit

• • • • • • • •

Complete kit for amateur slave and master. Includes instructional video. Leather wrist restraints. Black latex flog. Dog collar Leather Paddle 2 tie-off straps/leash Blindfold

MEO from Germany has an extensive collection of BDSM accessories for those who are interested in something a little more hard-core.

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Sacred Space Holy Ground

What is the difference between “sex” and “sacred sex”? Essentially, the difference is your attitude and intention. It is primarily through ceremony and ritual that we communicate with our souls. Creating a sacred space for loving is one of the best ways of signaling to your deepest / highest consciousness that your intention is to elevate lovemaking to an art and a sacrament. In this way the lovers may graduate from ordinary friction sex (in which bodies rub together for pleasure) to energy sex (in which there is a deep emotional and energetic connection), and ultimately if love is present to the complete union of soul sex. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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Honoring the God and Goddess

We are all ordinary human beings, and yet we are at once god and goddess, simultaneously flawed and wonderful. In sacred loving each of you brings to it your absolute best, and each of you looks for and expects to find the best in your partner. You treat each other as the god and goddess you actually are. You offer your lovemaking to God as a way to honor Him, to celebrate His love and blessings and to the Goddess for the great abundance that surrounds you. However attractive your lovemaking space is when you start, take 10-15 minutes to transform it by adding fresh flowers or plants, changing the lighting with lots of candles, selecting the perfect music, draping beautiful pieces of cloth over hard edges, bringing in special objects that have emotional or spiritual significance for both of you such as photographs or gifts you have given each other previously.

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Sacred Bathing Merging in the ocean of consciousness

One perfect way to begin a sacred loving time is to bathe together. Place candles around the bathing area; put fresh or dried flower petals in the water, use bath salts, essential oils and fine herbal soaps.

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Washing away cares of the world

Wash each other’s hair and cleanse each other’s bodies— kindly, gently, and passionately. Focus on transcending the cares of the world, bringing your full conscious attention into the present moment for ecstatic lovemaking. Recommended Reading: Sacred Ceremony: How to Create Ceremonies for Healing, Transitions, and Celebrations by Steven D. Farmer, Ph.D.

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Serving one another

Serve one another with adoring random acts of loving kindness, in the bath as well as at other times.

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Oral Sex “69”

“The pair of you lie side by side, facing opposite ways, and kiss each other's secret parts.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

Oral loving is a classic way for lovers to serve up pleasure. Really, aren’t you a better person when you regularly experience pleasure? Aren’t you nicer to be around and easier to get along with? Don’t you like yourself better when you are regularly experiencing pleasure?

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Oral Sex Cunnilingus “When you give really good head, you are entering the Temple of the Goddess as her Servant, her humble, resourceful, eager to please, wetback, asslickin’, clitsuckin’ servant.” Dr. Susan Block

Eating cotton candy

“Ah, goddess ambrosia—peaches, ripe mango, cotton candy—can I please keep my face here forever my love?”

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Sweet copulins pheromones

“Now spread, indeed cleave asunder, that archway with your nose and let your tongue gently probe her yoni, with your nose, lips and chin slowly circling.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

Sweet copulins pheromones are only produced in the vaginal canal. Men are chemically programmed to want to have their face at your pleasure-treasure cove! Pheromones are the chemical sexual attractants produced by animals to allure the opposite sex to mate. Both males and females produce pheromones. An organ called the “vasometer” located in the nasal passage detects pheromones. Even though the vasometer is located in the nose, pheromones are not scents in the same way a perfume is a scent, but many perfumes now have pheromones added. A man or woman who wears them is reportedly irresistible to the opposite sex.

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Clitoral Kissing

“Next, fasten your lips to hers and take deep kisses from this lovely one, your beloved, nibbling at her and sucking hard at her clitoris. Let your tongue rest for a moment in the archway to the flower-bowed Lord's temple before entering to worship vigorously, causing her seed to flow.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

Many women are under the mistaken assumption that men want a woman with a perfect “10” body, whatever that might be. This is a simple error of judgment that is cause for much suffering in women, and some of the most selfdestructive behaviors such as eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia. What most men actually want is a woman to completely surrender to her passion in active lovemaking, to love it, to want it, and to enjoy herself completely without shame or guilt. This is the single greatest turn-on for almost every male lover. Men find such a woman completely irresistible, regardless of her body style.

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Oral Sex

Fellatio Please sir may I have more?

“She takes the head of your penis gently between her lips, by turns pressing, kissing it tenderly and pulling at its soft skin.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

Many men enjoy having their genitals touched at any time and find that it leads to an instant erection. Women on the other hand, generally prefer not to have their breasts and genitals touched until after they are already sexually aroused. This important gender difference between men and women is the reason why we advise lovers NOT to © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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follow the Golden Rule—don’t do unto your lover what you want done unto you, because they are different things! One of the most common fantasies for a man is to have a beautiful sexy woman approach him, then without speaking, unzip his pants and suck him off fast and furious, with the whole episode being concluded in a matter of minutes. This fantasy is even juicier if it involves a woman he does not already know and happens in some public place such as at a cocktail party. The lovely lady then simply disappears and he never sees her again—no strings and no complications! Men are full of contradictions when it comes to blowjobs. They long for them, dream about them, wet-dream about them, and can never seem to get too many, but at the same time they may fear the very thing they desire. For one thing, with many men, fellatio can bring them to ejaculation very quickly. In the fantasy scenario above, this is not a problem, but in ordinary lovemaking it is extremely frustrating and downright embarrassing. If your man is one who tends to come very quickly, it is much better for both of you if you use a slower, gentler build-up of sexual arousal before there is any touching or sucking of that gorgeous stalk of jade. A man may also have a subconscious fear of being devoured by an insatiable, sexually hungry woman. So ladies, when you do take him into your luscious mouth, exploring with pouty lips and probing tongue, beware of frightening him with your voracious sucking hunger of lusty passion. Part of the Dracula myth is based upon man’s fear of being sucked dry out the end of his cock, in intercourse and fellatio.

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In a more ordinary lovemaking situation, as opposed to the fantasy of instant-fast-furious-fellatio, what your man is probably most desirous of is a very slow, very tantalizing, very seductive, very playful sucking that lasts on and on and on for a very long time. The way to be sure that he does not come too quickly, is that you must change what you are doing frequently, and as soon as he is showing a stage four, bone-hard erection, allow that erection to subside or he may ejaculate and in that way reject the very pleasure he really wants, and nice guy that he is, deserves.

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Treat with trust

“Fired by passion, she takes your penis deep into her mouth, pulling upon it and sucking as vigorously as though she were stripping clean a mango-stone. When she senses that your orgasm is imminent she swallows up the whole penis, sucking and working upon it with lips and tongue until you spend.” Love Teachings of Kama Sutra, by Vatsyayana, translated by Indra Sinha

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Watching Eye Candy

Visually, one of the most erotic things is to watch your lover masturbate in complete lusty sexual abandon. A rare, extraordinary treat is to see her ejaculate with the sunshine streaming in through a window (or if you are lying outside), resulting in a kaleidoscope of exotic colors as her squirting juicy nectar diffuses and refracts the rays of light.

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Show me what you like

We encourage lovers to ask for what they want. You can’t get what you want if your lover does not know what that is. What better way to communicate your lusty desires than to show her how you want to be touched, by touching yourself as she watches adoringly. This requires surrender, a challenging but essential skill for all great male lovers. Many men are more comfortable being the initiator, being in charge, being the doer and giver. But, in Tantric sacred loving, the lead is smoothly passed from one to the other, requiring that both are equally skilled at giving and receiving pleasure.

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Carry on while I take a rest

Men are like fire (heating up and burning out quickly), while women are like water (slowly coming to a boil, but then rolling along for quite some time). If the man has ejaculated and lost his erection, the lady may “finish off what was started” as he holds her lovingly. Or, it may be desirable for the man to take a rest during extended lovemaking, before returning to active intercourse. This is a perfect opportunity for the lady to show her man how she likes to be touched, and how she comes with manual stimulation of her clitoris, her “love button”, whose only purpose is pleasure.

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I get all wet watching you please yourself

Men, put on an erotic performance for your lady. Dare to give her a sexy strip tease and exotic dance. If you have mastered contracting one muscle at a time while holding all the others completely relaxed, show the observant goddess how you can lift your testicles, bob your penis, tighten your anus or perineum. Culminate with a masturbation ceremony, while she cheers you on with appreciative exclamations of delight. Perhaps she prefers that you come onto her body or into her luscious mouth to end the session. Ask your lady what is her fancy.

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Afterplay In the glow…

What happens after lovemaking is as important as what happens during lovemaking. When the ordinary man ends lovemaking with an involuntary ejaculation, both lovers can feel cheated and disappointed. The male typically wants to roll over and go to sleep or get up and immediately return to some “important” project he is working on. It may be this emotional distance that is most disturbing to females rather than premature ejaculation. Staying emotionally and energetically connected after lovemaking makes your lady feel safe, secure, loved, adored, and respected.

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Thank you my darling

For most women a deep emotional and energetic connection is far more important than having lots of orgasms (but lots of orgasms are very nice too!). The superior male lover makes himself emotionally available after lovemaking. This is the time for gentle hugging, kissing and beautiful words of adoration and appreciation for the gifts you have bestowed upon each other.

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Summary and Conclusions Choreograph your own sacred loving sequences in the art of love. Be imaginative, be bold, go where you never thought you would dare. Experiment and play with any or all of the positions illustrated in this manual. When you find those that suit both of you, explore moving seamlessly from one position to another, sometimes without breaking the contact of sexual intercourse. Over the course of several hours of lovemaking, establish a rhythm of active postures for increasing arousal followed by very slow or still poses where your focus is on moving the energy you have fired up, then build again, circulate again and so on in a series of peaks. Use squeezing of your genital muscles, breathing in harmony, visualizing energy rising, and running hands up your bodies to help the energy move up through your chakra centers, into each other and out to merge with the Divine consciousness. Nine peaks of arousal and energy circulation are considered particularly fortuitous in the Eastern view. Most of all, love one another, never counting the cost. all good things,

Al Link and Pala Copeland

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Classic Love Texts Kama Sutra Kama Sutra Online Resources Tantra Magazine They offer a wealth of information about sexual lovemaking positions drawn from the Kama Sutra, Ananga Ranga and Perfumed Garden. Kama Sutra, by Mallanaga Vatsyayana, Sir Richard Burton (Translator) FREE online version offered by Tantra Magazine Kama Sutra Books The Bedside Kama Sutra: 23 Positions for Pleasure and Passion, by Linda Sonntag A fresh and easy-to-use guide based on the most renowned ancient text on sexual pleasures and techniques. Combining stunning erotic photography with classic erotic art from the East, this sensual compendium covers 23 sexual positions designed to educate, excite, and entertain. Included in this voluptuous volume are: •Over 180 full-color erotic photographs •Over 30 reproductions of classic erotic art from the East •Step-by-step instructions for 23 erotic positions •Commentary on, and extracts from, the original Kama Sutra

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The Complete Kama Sutra, The First Unabridged Modern Translation of the Classic Indian Text [UNABRIDGED], by Mallanaga Vatsyayana, Alain Danielou (Translator) The galaxy of pleasures in Alain Daniélou's translation of the Kama Sutra takes you back to an India where sexuality was an integral part of life and an avenue to spiritual bliss. As Devadatta Shastri says in his commentary: "At the moment when the peak of bliss is attained, the internal and external world vanish. The man and woman cease to be separate entities and lose themselves in the beatitudes of being." Daniélou's elegant rendering includes not only the entire sutra, much of which is excluded in other versions, but two essential commentaries as well. More than just a pillow book, the Kama Sutra is a guide to the labyrinth of sexual etiquette, from how to bathe before meeting a lover to how lovers should entertain each other after making love. Admittedly, the text is dated and culture bound in places; it can be chauvinistic, bizarre, and even violent. The commentators are careful to point out, however, that the work is an overview of all sexual practices, some of which are not recommended. Take from this encyclopedia of amour what you will and let it keep you moving down the path of spiritual practice. --Brian Bruya (review on Amazon.com) Library Journal Long dismissed as a sort of Sanskrit Joy of Sex , the Kama Sutra , composed by Vatsyayana in the fourth century, explores sexuality as an integral part of human existence. Arguing that happiness and moral duty ( dharma ) depend on elaborate social ritual to satisfy the essential needs of life, the Kama Sutra describes the practices, rituals, and © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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lore of the erotic ( kama ) in human relations, both heterosexual and homosexual. Noted Indiologist Danielou provides a fluent and literal translation of the entire Sanskrit original with interpolated extracts from the 12thcentury commentary by Yashodara and the modern Hindi commentary by Devadatta Shastri. This is an important advance over Burton's Victorian abridgment. - T.L. Cooksey, Armstrong State Coll., Savannah, Ga. Times Literary Supplement Danilou's new and complete translation of the Kama Sutra is one of his masterpieces. It is all enchantment, a world of refined sensation totally without humbug. Our debt to his scholarship and humanity is immeasurable. The Guardian Weekend Dildo was translated as 'medicine.' Lesbian was just 'corrupt woman.' No wonder we couldn't follow any of the instructions in the Kama Sutra. But now, there's a new translation of the oldest sex manual, the first since the Victorians brought it home and hid it under the mattress. The Times Literary Supplement Danielou's new and complete translation of the Kama Sutra is one of his masterpieces. It is all enchantment, a world of refined sensation totally without humbug. Our debt to his scholarship and humanity is immeasurable.

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Kama Sutra (Oxford World’s Classics), by Mallanaga Vatsyayana, Wendy Doniger and Sudhir Kakar (Translators) The Kamasutra is the oldest extant textbook of erotic love. But it is more than a book about sex. It is about the art of living—about finding a partner, maintaining power in a marriage, committing adultery, living as or with a courtesan, using drugs--and also, of course, about the many and varied positions available to lovers in sexual intercourse and the pleasures to be derived from each. The Kamasutra was composed in Sanskrit, the literary language of ancient India, sometime in the third century, probably in North India. It combines an encyclopedic coverage of all imaginable aspects of sex with a closely observed sexual psychology and a dramatic, novelistic narrative of seduction, consummation, and disentanglement. Best known in English through the highly mannered, padded, and inaccurate nineteenth-century translation by Sir Richard Burton, the text is newly translated here into clear, vivid, sexually frank English. This edition also includes a section of vivid Indian color illustrations along with three uniquely important commentaries: translated excerpts from the earliest and most famous Sanskrit commentary (thirteenth century) and from a twentieth-century Hindi commentary, and explanatory notes by the two translators. The lively and entertaining introduction by translator Wendy Doniger, one of the world's foremost Sanskrit scholars, discusses the history of The Kamasutra and its reception in India and Europe, analyses its attitudes toward gender and sexual violence, and sets it in the context of ancient Indian social theory, scientific method, and sexual

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ethics. ""[This] new translation is fascinating, thoughtprovoking and occasionally even amusing.""--Salon.com

The Illustrated Kama Sutra : Ananga-Ranga and Perfumed Garden - The Classic Eastern Love Texts, by Mallanaga Vatsyayana, Kalyana Malla, Sheikh Nefzawi, Richard Francis Burton (Translator) Here, for the first time, Sir Richard Burton's translations of the classic Eastern love texts have been published in one volume. Sexual frankness without a hint of guilt or prurience is the great legacy which the Eastern, and in particular Indian, traditions have given us. As an expression of human culture, and as a pillow book for the modern boudoir, the Kama Sutra of Vatsyayana the most famous work on sex ever written, the Ananga-Ranga of Kalyana Malla, and Sheikh Nefzawi's Perfumed Garden, set forth the principles of sensual pleasure with poetry, wisdom, and humor, celebrating love as an ecstatic expression of life's beauty. The first Kama Sutra to be illustrated in color with a dazzling and unique collection of Indian painting and sculpture. These erotic treatises are not sex manuals in the modern sense clinical collections of coital postures but a broader and more humane exploration of Eastern sexual customs. About the Author Sir Richard F. Burton (1821-1890) was one of the greatest traveler-explorers of history, whose life has recently been © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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chronicled both in biography (Captain Sir Richard Burton) and film (Mountains of the Moon). Famous as the translator of The 1001 Arabian Nights, Burton also searched for the headwaters of the Nile, and was the discoverer of the central lakes of Africa. Orientalist, prolific author, and member of the Royal Geographic Society, he was one of the most remarkable and controversial men of his century. Kama Sutra of Vatsyayana (Illustrated Edition) [DOWNLOAD: MICROSOFT READER] by Mallanaga Vatsyayana, Richard Francis Burton (Translator)

The Love Teachings of Kama Sutra: With Extracts from Koka Shastra, Ananga Ranga and Other Famous Indian Works on Love, by Mallanaga Vatsyayana, Indra Sinha (Translator) Kama Sutra is the world's classic study of the arts of love, written in about the fourth century AD by the mysterious sage Vatsyayana. He analyses, with the detached wisdom of old age, the possibilities of lovemaking from the first approaches to the consummation, from the sexual positions to the arrangement of furniture and the role of a go-between. His dry wit, charm and vivid language combine to give the book a relevance far beyond the perfumed world of ancient India that it describes, and create of it a humane masterpiece that contains no hint of obscenity. Kama Sutra has only been known in the English language in a nineteenth-century translation by Sir Richard Burton. The present work is an entirely new translation, made for a modern public; a public which, with Vatsyayana, © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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understands far more clearly than did Burton's contemporaries the importance of physical pleasure to spiritual welfare. Utterly frank in its attitude to sex, the Kama Sutra is Vatsyayana's classic study of the arts of love. In this new translation, Indra Sinha captures the beautiful, vivid language of the original as well as the humor that's been lost in previous versions.

Kama Sutra on DVD Kama Sutra - Positions 2 Volume Gift DVD Kama Sutra: The Sensual Art of Lovemaking - Touch & the Intimate Kiss (2002) DVD Kama Sutra: The Sensual Art of Lovemaking - Intimacy to Ectasy (2002) DVD Kama Sutra - The Sensual Art of Lovemaking (Positions of the Perfumed Garden/Positions of the Tao) DVD

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Ananga Ranga Ananga Ranga Online Resources Tantra Magazine They offer a wealth of information about sexual lovemaking positions drawn from the Kama Sutra, Ananga Ranga and Perfumed Garden. Ananga Ranga, by Kalyana Malla, Sir Richard Burton (Translator) FREE online version offered by Tantra Magazine

Ananga Ranga Books The Illustrated Kama Sutra : Ananga-Ranga and Perfumed Garden - The Classic Eastern Love Texts, by Mallanaga Vatsyayana, Kalyana Malla, Sheikh Nefzawi, Richard Francis Burton (Translator) (see description above) The Love Teachings of Kama Sutra: With Extracts from Koka Shastra, Ananga Ranga and Other Famous Indian Works on Love, by Mallanaga Vatsyayana, Indra Sinha (Translator) (see description above)

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The Perfumed Garden Perfumed Garden Online Resources Tantra Magazine They offer a wealth of information about sexual lovemaking positions drawn from the Kama Sutra, Ananga Ranga and Perfumed Garden. Perfumed Garden, by Umar Ibn Muhammad Nafzawi, Richard F. Burton (Translator) FREE online version offered by Tantra Magazine Perfumed Garden Books The Perfumed Garden of the Cheikh Nefzaoui: A Manual of Arabian Erotology by Umar Ibn Muhammad Nafzawi, Mary S. Lovell and Richard F. Burton (Translators) Written in the 16th Century, this volume is one of the oldest texts on the subject of erotica. It provides a fascinating look into the sexual customs and behavior of Arabia in the Middle Ages, much like the Kama Sutra reflects ancient Hindu culture. Translated into English by the renowned explorer Sir Richard F. Burton, The Perfumed Garden Of The Cheikh Nefzaoui explicitly sings the praises of intimacy. Sections include "Concerning Everything Favorable to Coition," "Of Matters which are Injurious in the act of Generation," and "On the Deceits and Treacheries of Women." With complete candor, this classic celebrates sensual pleasure with beautiful prose. © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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"I swear before God, certainly! The knowledge of this book is necessary. It will be only the shamefully ignorant, the enemy of all science who does not read it, or who turns it into ridicule." --Cheikh Nefzaoui Ingram (review on Amazon.com) Written in the 16th Century, this volume is one of the oldest texts on the subject of erotica. It provides a fascinating look into the sexual customs and behavior of Arabia in the Middle Ages, much like the Kama Sutra reflects ancient Hindu culture. Translated into English by the renowned explorer Sir Richard F. Burton, The Perfumed Garden Of The Sheikh Nefzawi explicitly sings the praises of intimacy. Sections include "Concerning Everything Favorable to Coition," "Of Matters which are Injurious in the act of Generation," and "On the Deceits and Treacheries of Women." With complete candor, this classic celebrates sensual pleasure with beautiful prose.

The Perfumed Garden [DOWNLOAD: MICROSOFT READER] by Sheikh Nefzawi, Richard Burton (Translator) The Illustrated Kama Sutra : Ananga-Ranga and Perfumed Garden - The Classic Eastern Love Texts, by Mallanaga Vatsyayana, Kalyana Malla, Sheikh Nefzawi, Richard Francis Burton (Translator) (see description above)

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Recommended Reading Kama Sutra Ananga Ranga Perfumed Garden Acupressure for Lovers: Secrets of Touch for Increasing Intimacy by Michael Reed Gach Loving Life After 60: Celebrating the Autumn of Your Life by Tom Paugh Sacred Ceremony: How to Create Ceremonies for Healing, Transitions, and Celebrations by Steven D. Farmer, Ph.D. Biological Transmutations and their applications in: Chemistry, Physics, Biology, Ecology, Medicine, Nutrition, Agronomy, Geology, by Louis C. Kervran “Biological transmutation is the process through which a live organism, in certain conditions, activates nuclear reactions that lead to the transformation of a chemical element in another chemical element. Biological transmutation releases slowly significant quantities of energy. Sperm, in men's case and sexual fluids in women's case, can be transformed into energy. This takes place inside the body. So this energy is huge and it remains in our body on different levels, giving us multiple advantages.” Soul Sex: Tantra for Two, by Pala Copeland and Al Link Our emphasis in Soul Sex is on ardent monogamous relationship, why it is a spiritual practice, and how through it we can know God and serve the world. Thoughtprovoking discussions, personal anecdotes and precise but simple techniques inspire readers to apply these concepts in © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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their daily lives. The observations and exercises we include are drawn from our own heady partnership and from the hundreds of couples we have had the privilege to teach at our Tantra sacred sex workshops. Detailed references to books, videos, music and online resources provide readers with opportunities to further explore relationship, sexuality and spirituality. “Soul Sex is a guide for those who want to leave the old western perception of love making behind and shift to the art of divine humans expressing love through the channels of our soul. The authors share an authentic and wholistic view that brings new hope to couples who desire to stretch beyond limitations and move into a more thriving partnership that deepens and brings true connection of union in the soul sex experience.” Claire Papin, Co-host of Wisdom Today Radio Show Listen to radio interviews with Al and Pala about Soul Sex.

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Related Products Books for Lovers eBooks for Lovers Videos for Lovers Kama Sutra and Sexual Positions Videos and DVDs Massage Videos Music for Lovers Massage Products Massage Books Massage Videos Massage Lotions, Creams, Oils, and Lubricants Perfumes Pheromones Aphrodisiacs Viagra Erotic Games Lingerie and Sexy Clothing Sex Toys Safe Sex Products Find Your Soulmate Tantra Weekends for Couples © 4Freedoms Relationship Tantra 2003

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About Authors Al Link and Pala Copeland

Al Link and Pala Copeland own and operate 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra. Since 1987 they have been Tantric lovers and have been teaching others since 1997. They regularly host Tantra Sacred Sex workshops in Ontario and Quebec, and weeklong retreats in exotic locations around the planet. For more information call toll free from Canada or USA: 1800-684-5308 International long distance: 1-819-689-5308. Visit their website or send email. Look for their book, Soul Sex: Tantra for Two, from New Page Books, March 2003, or visit their web site for a FREE illustrated PDF file with chapter excerpts.

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eBooks available from 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra eBooks by Al Link & Pala Copeland 100 Ways to Keep Your Lover, by Al Link and Pala Copeland, First interactive edition March 2003 • available in Adobe (PDF) and MS Reader (lit) formats: as downloadable files and on CD-ROM

Voluntary Ejaculation and Male Multiple Orgasms, by Al Link and Pala Copeland, First interactive edition May 2003 available in Adobe • (PDF) and MS Reader (lit) formats: as downloadable files and on CD-ROM

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4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra Guide to Sex Toys • a free PDF file with illustrations and hot links

Soul Sex: Tantra for Two, by Pala Copeland and Al Link, New Page Books, 2003 • a free PDF file of excerpts from the book, includes illustrations

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eBooks by Other Authors Abundance •

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Dr. Sylvia Hartmann’s Adventures in Emotional Freedom Technique The Choices Energy Psychology Manual (EFT) How to Attune Yourself and Others Into Any Healing System The Quest: Maximizing Health and Wellness Through Spiritual Healing Homeopathic Secrets (Duplicate Any Homeopathic Remedy) The Masters Course (Hypnosis and SelfHypnosis) Hypnosis & NLP Audio Products and eBooks Qi Gong Natural Hair Re-Growth and Your Diet Boost Your Anti-Aging Enzymes Honey Magic Rapid Stress Relief Garlic Magic Vinegar Magic Home Made Medicine Hair Loss No More! Five Tibetan Secrets of Rejuvenation 2003 Astrology & Feng Shui Guide

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Mid-Life Moms The Single Mom’s Survival Guide

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A-Z Guide to Perfect Fellatio

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Ordering a CD-ROM Copy of this eBook You can order a copy of this eBook in CD-ROM format. Cost is $15.00 US, which includes taxes, handling and shipping to anywhere in the world.

Order Sexual Positions eBook CD-ROM HERE

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