Self-hypnosis for Personal Creativity
Short Description
A good hypnotherapist should teach self-hypnosis to clients as part of their sessions;, always ask about this before boo...
Description
Self-hypnosis for Personal Creativity A good hypnotherapist should teach self-hypnosis to clients as part of their sessions;, always ask about this before booking. In fact, one of the great tools that you can take away from a course in hypnotherapy is the ability to use selfhypnosis. Nearly everyone can learn how to use self-hypnosis to make specific changes in areas of their life such as:
Stop unwanted habits such as smoking Manage stress Increase concentration Improve athletic performance Improve self-confidence Improve sleeping Achieve goals, such as weight loss or exam success
Self-hypnosis is a perfectly safe, pleasant, non-toxic and often more effective alternative to tranquillisers or painkillers. Self-hypnosis allows you to rejuvenate your body and mind, leading to a greater sense of well-being.
Foreword Although we may not realise it, we all carry around within us the necessary resources for personal evolution and success. Self-hypnosis can be a very effective tool for utilising those resources to make changes in our lives. The following self-hypnosis techniques can all be used to create the hypnotic state for yourself. They are simple but powerful tools, that will not only help you to relax very deeply and cope with stress more easily, but can also help you to solve problems and overcome personal challenges. Inevitably, some of these will feel more comfortable than others, so it is just a matter of trying them all out and finding one that suits you best. Make selfhypnosis something you do every day, even if it is only for a few minutes. You do not have to spend hours in deep, monastic meditation in order to feel the benefits. You can do it at set times or whenever the opportunity arises, according to your preference and lifestyle. At first, use these self-hypnosis techniques to relax and de-stress. This is a significant investment in your wellbeing, and will in itself begin to help you to solve problems, since you will have more energy and be able to think more 2
clearly. As you become more familiar with the different self-hypnosis techniques, you can use them in a more creative way, to mentally rehearse a preferred future – perhaps one in which an unwanted habit no longer plays a part, or perhaps imagining yourself performing well at a forthcoming event, such as a job interview or exam. The only requirement for self-hypnosis is comfort and a degree of privacy, so find somewhere where you can sit down and remain undisturbed for a while. Some people like to lie down whilst practising self-hypnosis. This is fine too, but be aware that you might simply fall asleep. A power nap can be very beneficial, but it is not self-hypnosis. Some people also like to set an alarm clock or timer to keep their self-hypnosis sessions within defined limits. Again, this is a matter of personal preference, although it is worth remembering that we have remarkably efficient body clocks. If you tell yourself that you will enjoy selfhypnosis for ten minutes, chances are that you will find yourself naturally opening your eyes exactly ten minutes later. Our subconscious mind never stops looking out for us, even when we are asleep, so if something happens that requires your immediate attention you’ll be instantly alert and ready to deal with it. You are very unlikely to be so far gone in hypnosis that you don’t notice the smoke alarm going off. Nevertheless, be sensible – don’t put your deep fat fryer on before settling down and using selfhypnosis!
The Subconscious Mind We have two parts to our brain – the conscious part and what we call the “subconscious.” These two parts have very different roles. When you cut your finger, for instance, you can consciously decide to clean the wound and apply a plaster. But all the work that actually heals the wound is controlled by the subconscious. The creation of an inflamed area protects the rest of the body from infection, the engagement of the immune system kills off the bacteria, and the body creates new skin to replace what has been lost – and all of this happens without any conscious input! We frequently mention the subconscious mind when we talk about hypnosis and hypnotherapy. There is no doubting the power of this “invisible” part of our mind. The subconscious governs our every waking moment, determining the people we like, the way we react to others, our behaviour patterns in specific situations, the things we “cannot stand at any price”, the sort of entertainment we enjoy, our sexual attitudes… everything we do is at least coloured, if not controlled, by our subconscious processes.
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The subconscious mind does not actually think The subconscious is totally without reason or logic, without judgement or criticism, without qualification or allowance. In the subconscious everything is either black or white, it either is or is not. It is, in effect, nothing more than a reactive emotional centre where our instinctive resources reside, both those we were born with and those we have acquired through the process of living. It is an evaluation system that constantly weighs up every single input through our senses for every split second of our lives. The subconscious only communicates with the conscious mind via feelings – and it uses that communication to seek to keep us safe. It appears to be able to evaluate every new input from our five senses against everything we have experienced so far in our life. If the new input matches something already experienced, then the reaction we notice will depend on the result, be it a good reaction, which might be pleasure, or a bad reaction, which might be fear.
The workings of the subconscious are completely invisible The subconscious is completely invisible to consciousness. Absolutely nobody can feel his or her subconscious at work, so we have no way of knowing what the new input is actually being compared with, which accounts for why we might take a sudden dislike to a particular individual or maybe experience a surge of fear over some relatively minor event. Of course, it can just as easily work in reverse; have you ever had that situation where you like something so much it confuses even you? And you end up saying something like: “Goodness knows why I’m so hooked on…” whatever it is. It can be a singularly unsuitable partner or maybe an item of clothing or almost anything.
The subconscious is unbelievably fast in its processing ability Now this is a little complicated to take on board, but it is a fact that by the time you are consciously aware of a stimulus, an input from any of your senses, including your own thought processes, by the time you are consciously aware of that stimulus, the subconscious has sensed it, tested it several thousand times, and already attempted to instigate an action based upon it. Then your conscious mind gets in the way… and that, in a nutshell, is the origin of conflict. Your subconscious mind urging you to perform some action or other that is different from that which you consciously wish to do.
The subconscious mind often gets things wrong It is an important fact that, although one of the primary objectives of the subconscious mind is survival of the organism, it makes mistakes about what is
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actually a threat to survival. Or seems to. These mistakes often show up as… symptoms. A symptom, in the context of the psychological workings of our mind, is nothing more than a behaviour pattern which is inappropriate to the situation in which we find ourselves. The phobic response is a good example – there is usually no valid rationale, yet the fear it can generate is immense. Sometimes, these symptoms, whatever they might be, are nothing more than an acquired habit, a conditioned response. But even that has its roots in subconscious processes, otherwise we would simply stop doing whatever it is. Or start doing whatever it is we believe we cannot.
The subconscious does not listen to conscious reasoning The thing about the subconscious is that it does not give us a chance to consciously reason our way through what it does, because it only communicates with us via feelings which govern our reactions. If we try to overcome those feelings and reactions with conscious reasoning, then the subconscious redoubles its efforts! Have you ever tried to reason away fear when the conscious mind cannot recognise why the fear is actually there in the first place? Public speaking is a good example of this sort of thing. Many people have an irrational fear of public speaking – irrational, because, after all what can actually happen? OK, you might make a mistake and possibly forget what you were going to say… but the dry mouth, leg-quaking, stomach-churning, heart-pumping feeling of real fear that can often result at merely the thought of it is a bit ‘over the top’, if viewed rationally! But it does not go away just because you know that. The subconscious ‘learnt’ that reaction, took it on board as an instinct designed to protect you in some way, and now has no intention of letting you make any changes to it. This process is almost certainly linked into our ancient survival mechanisms from our pre-human days, millions of years ago. It is precisely because it has been perceived by subconscious that we need that specific response for survival, that it has been consigned to a place in our mind where it does not need conscious thought to operate, and cannot be interfered with by consciousness… well, almost cannot.
Hypnosis allows us to communicate with the subconscious It is often pointless attempting to make the change in our conscious mind, when the process resides in our subconscious. Hypnosis allows us to make beneficial changes in the very depths of that subconscious – and as such it can be a truly astounding power for good. By entering the state of hypnosis we can safely 5
bypass the Conscious Critical Faculty part of the mind and ‘reprogram’ the subconscious so that it takes on board new, better ideas. Everyone can benefit from hypnosis. If you find that you are repeatedly doing something you do not want to do, or repeatedly not doing something that you need/want to do, then you are emotionally unwell, i.e. you have a symptom. Always remember, a symptom is nothing more than the expression of an idea that has been absorbed by the subconscious but which is in conflict with conscious wishes or needs. Hypnosis and hypnotherapy enables us to find a way to override that subconscious idea or to bring it into the light and either reevaluate its validity, or use suggestion to render it inactive. There are so many myths and misconceptions about hypnosis, one of which is that people can be made to do or say things against their will or moral code. Therefore it is important to point out that these ideas for change, by way of hypnotic suggestion, must be desirable for you, the individual and accompanied by the presence of positive emotion. When they are, the possibilities for personal improvement are almost limitless.
What is Self-Hypnosis? Have you ever seen old horror films and television programmes that portray hypnosis as a frightening instrument of mind control where unscrupulous villains enslave the will of helpless victims? Perhaps you have seen stage shows where a hypnotist seems to be able to use their “hypnotic powers” to make people do and say things that they would never do or say under normal 6
conditions. If so, it is not surprising that hypnosis may seem just a little bit wacky, not unlike other seemingly mystical and unexplainable phenomena. This is unfortunate because hypnosis is, in fact, a serious therapeutic tool that can help people overcome many psychological, emotional and even some physical problems. Many people have experienced a trance-like state many times in everyday life although they may not have called it hypnosis. For example, if you've ever drifted off into a daydream, become totally engrossed in a book or project, or become absorbed in your thoughts while driving and missed a turning. The main difference between these sorts of trance and self-hypnosis are specific motivation and suggestions towards a goal. Self-hypnosis is deliberate and with a purpose. Hypnosis can be described as a state of mind in which suggestions are acted upon much more powerfully than is possible under normal conditions. By achieving a state of heightened focus and awareness, and suppressing the critical faculty, suggestions can be passed directly to the unconscious mind. The above remains true for self-hypnosis, but being done for yourself rather than via a third party (hypnotherapist). Many believe that all hypnosis is selfhypnosis as the subject or client always remains in control. The hypnotherapist is there only to guide the client into hypnosis, and in doing so teaches them a powerful tool they can use for themselves. Hypnosis is not: Mind control Brain-washing Sleep Unconsciousness A peculiar altered state A mystical state When in hypnosis a person is: Aware In control In a natural and harmless state Able to come out of hypnosis when s/he wishes to
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The state of hypnosis can best be described as a state of highly focused attention with heightened suggestibility. Hypnosis is sometimes but not always accompanied by relaxation. When a person such as a therapist induces hypnosis in another it is called hetero hypnosis, often referred to as hypnotherapy. When hypnosis is self-induced it is called autohypnosis and is often referred to as selfhypnosis. The word hypnosis comes from the Greek word “hypos” which means sleep. It is an abbreviation of the term neuro-hypnotism which means sleep of the nervous system. This term was used by the eminent neurosurgeon James Braid (1796-1860). However, hypnosis is not a sleep state. In fact, when in hypnosis a person is awake and usually aware of everything that is said and done. Realising this, Braid later tried to change the name to mono-idealism. This means a marked preoccupation with one idea or subject. However, the term hypnosis stuck and is used right up to this day.
How can I use self-hypnosis to achieve my goals? Self-hypnosis is often used to modify behaviour, emotions and attitudes. For instance, many people use self-hypnosis to help deal with the problems of everyday living. Self-hypnosis can boost confidence and even help people develop new skills. A great stress and anxiety reliever, it can also be used to help overcome habits such as smoking and overeating. Sports men and women can enhance their athletic performance with self-hypnosis, and people suffering from physical pain or stress-related illnesses also find it helpful (hypnosis should only be used in this way after a medical diagnosis has been made and under the guidance of a doctor or qualified therapist).
A Self-hypnosis Technique I am going to introduce you to a simple but effective technique of self-hypnosis. This technique is called eye fixation self-hypnosis and is one of the most popular and effective forms of self-hypnosis ever developed. We will start by using it as a method to help you relax. After you have practised this a number of times we will add hypnotic suggestions and imagery. Reduce distractions by going into a room where you are unlikely to be disturbed and turning off your phone, television, computer, etc. This is your time. You are going to focus on your goal of self-hypnosis and nothing else.
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Then: 1. Sit in a comfortable chair with your legs and feet uncrossed. Avoid eating a large meal just before so you don’t feel bloated or uncomfortable. Unless you wish to nod off, sit in a chair, as lying down on a bed will likely induce sleep. You may also wish to loosen tight clothing and take off your shoes. If you wear contact lenses, it is advisable to remove them. Keep your legs and feet uncrossed. 2. Look up at the ceiling and take in a deep breath. Without straining your neck or tilting your head to far back pick a point on the ceiling and fix your gaze on that point. While you keep your eyes fixed on that point take in a deep breath and hold it for a moment and then breathe out. Silently repeat the suggestion “My eyes are tired and heavy and I want to SLEEP NOW”. Repeat this process to yourself another couple of times and, if your eyes have not already done so, let them close and relax in a normal closed position. It is important when saying the suggestion that you say it to yourself as if you mean it, for example in a gentle, soothing but convincing manner. 3. Let your body relax. Allow your body to become loose and limp in the chair just like a rag doll. Then slowly and with intention count down silently from five to zero. Tell yourself that with each and every count you’re becoming more and more relaxed. Stay in this relaxed state for a number of minutes while focusing on your breathing. Notice the rising and falling of your diaphragm and chest. Be aware how relaxed your body is becoming without you even having to try and relax it. In fact, the less you try, the more relaxed you become. 4. When ready, come back to the room by counting up from one to five. Tell yourself that you are becoming aware of your surroundings and at the count of five you will open your eyes. Count up from one to five in a lively, energetic manner. At the count of five, open your eyes and stretch your arms and legs. Repeat this technique three or four times and notice how each time you reach a deeper level of relaxation. However, if you find you do not relax as much as you would like, do not force it. There is a learning curve involved so resolve to practice self-hypnosis on a regular basis. Sometimes people will feel a little spaced out or drowsy after they come out of the hypnosis. This is similar to awaking from an afternoon nap, is harmless and passes after a few moments. However, do not drive or operate machinery until you feel fully awake. 9
Difficulties learning self-hypnosis Have you ever experienced the frustration of having a name on the tip of your tongue? The harder you try to remember the name, the harder it is to recall. Then when you relax the name comes back to you. Sometimes, when we try too hard, we block ourselves from achieving our goals. The attitude you take towards self-hypnosis will determine how easily you learn it. Don’t try too hard or set unrealistic goals. Relax and take your time. Accept the pace at which you achieve results, however small they may at first seem. Believe in yourself and you will go on to achieve the success you desire.
Post-hypnotic suggestions and their rules As previously mentioned, hypnosis is a state of heightened suggestibility. Giving yourself suggestions when in hypnosis will enable an action or other response to take place after the hypnotic experience has occurred. These forms of suggestion are called post-hypnotic suggestions and will help you to achieve your goals. Over the years, hypnotherapists have developed rules of suggestion. These are guidelines that will enable you to achieve maximum success with the suggestions you give yourself. What follows is a summary of these rules. 1. Say it as if you mean it. Have you ever seen an actor mumbling his lines on stage, speaking in a quiet meek voice? The result is a performance that’s not very convincing. Unlike acting, hypnotic suggestions are repeated silently. However, you need to repeat the suggestions as though you mean what you say. Be reassuring, positive and confident. 2. Suggestions need to be phrased positively and in the present tense. Most of us will react more favourably to a positively worded suggestion than a negative one. Which request would you rather hear: “Do not leave that lying on the floor” or “Would you mind picking that up?” Suggestions are far more effective when you mention what you wish to move towards, rather than what you are moving away from. For example: “I am calm” is better than “I am not anxious”. “I stop smoking with ease” is better than “I will try to stop smoking” as the word try implies difficulty and struggle. Your suggestions are best phrased in the present tense, as though they are happening at this moment in time.
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So, “I am relaxed on the aircraft” is better than “I will be relaxed when I am on the aircraft”. Or, “I am becoming more confident” is better than “I will try to be confident”. 3. Make your suggestions specific and realistic. Your suggestions are going to be more effective if they are specific and realistic. If you wish to improve your swimming performance, it would be unrealistic to give yourself the suggestion “I am a world-class swimmer”, unless of course you are, or are about to become, a world champion. Instead, ask yourself what specifically it is about your swimming that you wish to improve. So if you wished to improve your breaststroke, you would give yourself a realistic suggestion tailored to that specific aspect of your swimming. Structure your suggestions on changes you wish to see in yourself rather than things that are out of your control, such as external events and other people. Do not give yourself suggestions for two or three issues all at the same time. For instance, the suggestion “I am confident that I can lose weight and stop smoking” is probably not effective. Instead, work on one goal at a time, repeating suggestions associated with that goal. When you see some results, move on to your next goal. 4. Repetition of suggestions Advertisers know the value of suggestion, which is why they repeat television and radio commercials on a regular basis. One of the most important rules when practising self-hypnosis is repetition of your suggestions. That way you drive the point home and are far more likely to affect positive change.
Imagery in Hypnosis While giving yourself hypnotic suggestions, visualise the situation, the action and the feeling that you desire. As well as picturing a desired outcome, you can utilise your sense of touch, hearing and even smell. You can create new images as well as using images from your memories and experiences. People sometimes believe they have to see a crystal clear image of their goal, as though watching a movie. However, a positive attitude and a belief that you are “in the role” is more important than clear imagery. The following exercise will illustrate how effective suggestion and imagery can be. Do not use it if you have an aversion to lemons.
The lemon example Sit down in a comfortable chair and close your eyes. Picture an ordinary lemon. 11
Imagine you are cutting this lemon in half. Observe the juices running down each piece of the lemon. Pick up a piece of the lemon. Bring it up to your mouth and bite into it. Even if your image of the lemon wasn’t clear, you might still have grimaced, even found your mouth watering. Adding hypnotic suggestion and visualisation to self-hypnosis
Rehearsing positive outcomes Mandy experiences stage fright. She is due to take part in a play and is anxious that her performance will not be up to the standard of which she is capable. Mandy wants to learn self-hypnosis to help her feel more confident. I teach Mandy self-hypnosis and then teach her results imagery. In this technique, the person visualises herself performing and reacting in the way she desires while repeating post-hypnotic suggestions to help achieve a goal. After putting herself into hypnosis, Mandy pictures herself on stage performing with confidence and ease. While visualising this for 30 seconds she repeats three times the posthypnotic suggestion “I am performing with ease and confidence”. While still in hypnosis she repeats this process two more times.
This is how the technique is done: 1. Sit in a comfortable place with legs and feet uncrossed. 2. Without tilting your head or straining your neck, pick a point on the ceiling and fix your gaze on that point. While you keep your eyes fixed on that point, take in a deep breath and hold it for as long as is comfortable. Then, as you breathe out, repeat the suggestion “My eyes are tired and heavy and I want to SLEEP NOW.” Repeat this process to yourself another couple of times and, if your eyes have not already done so, let them close and relax in a normal closed position. 3. Allow your body to become loose and limp in the chair just like a rag doll. Then, slowly and with intention, count down silently from five to zero. Tell yourself that with each and every count you’re becoming more and more relaxed. 4. Picture an image that represents a situation you wish to master and see yourself achieving your goal. 5. Repeat to yourself three times a positive suggestion such as: “I am confident, calm and relaxed.” Say it with conviction while picturing the image for about 30 seconds. 12
Repeat this three times and between times stay in hypnosis and focus on your body’s relaxation. 6. Come back to the room by counting up from one to five and opening your eyes.
How to set your self-hypnosis goals 1. Give achieving your goals a high priority. Plan to use self-hypnosis on a daily basis and you will start to see results. 2. Write your goals down on paper. Clarify what you want to work on and be specific. Make sure you set goals that are achievable. If they are long-term goals, it may be helpful to break them down into manageable steps. 3. Formulate your hypnotic suggestions and write them down. Write out a number of suggestions for the goal you are working on. Follow the rules of posthypnotic suggestions. You may even want to write your own script (see the example further down). 4. Decide on the imagery you plan to use. If your aim is to relax, picture a pleasant scene like a beach or a park on a warm summer’s day. You may wish to use results imagery like Mandy did. 5. If you fail to achieve a goal, do not give yourself a hard time. Remember, failing to achieve a goal does not mean you are a failure. It may be that you need to approach the goal in a different way or perhaps you need to be persistent.
A self-hypnosis script to help you relax and reduce anxiety Below is a sample script designed to help you relax and cope with anxiety. Feel free to alter the imagery to fit your particular needs. For instance, instead of picturing yourself on a beach, you may prefer to imagine that you are in a park on a warm summer’s day. You may also wish to change the symbolism used to address an issue you wish to work on. Feel free to record the text and play it back, or have someone read it to you. First take yourself into hypnosis as before by: 1. Sitting in a comfortable place with legs and feet uncrossed 2. Without tilting your head or straining your neck, pick a point on the ceiling and fix your gaze on that point. While you keep your eyes fixed on that point, take in a deep breath and hold it for as long as is comfortable. Then, as you breathe out, repeat the suggestion “My eyes are tired and heavy and I want to SLEEP NOW.” Repeat this process to yourself another couple of times and, if your eyes have not already done so, let them close and relax in a normal closed position. 13
3. Repeat the following script to yourself silently and with conviction: “I am now allowing my body to become loose and limp in the chair just like a rag doll. As I continue to relax I am noticing where the comfort is in my body. Perhaps I notice a warming comfortable feeling in my hands and fingers or maybe the comfort is noticeable in another part of my body. With every breath I take and every sound I hear, the comfort deepens. I now count down from five to zero. With each and every count my relaxation deepens. It may even double. Five – deeper – four – calmer – three – more relaxed – two – one – zero.” “I now picture myself on a golden sandy beach. I can feel the warmth of the sand under my feet and the warmth of the sun on my body. I can imagine that I am alone on the beach or that others are there as my relaxation continues. I listen to the sound of the sea, the waves lapping against the shore. I feel so calm, secure and relaxed that I can stay on the beach for as long as I choose. After a while, I picture myself in a field on a warm summer’s day. There is not a cloud in the sky. In the middle of this field is a hot air balloon and attached to the balloon is a basket which is weighed down on the ground with sandbags. The hot air balloon hangs effortlessly in the sky. I now imagine that I am placing any worries, fear or anxieties into the basket. The more I offload my worries into the basket, the more relief I feel. I now feel as if a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders.” “I release the sandbags and watch as the balloon, along with its basket, rises into the air. As I watch the balloon rising into the air, I feel relief. The higher the balloon rises, the more relief I feel. The more distant the balloon becomes, the more insignificant my worries appear to be. As I watch this balloon getting smaller in the distance, I repeat to myself three times: “I am letting go of my worries, fear and anxiety.” “When ready, I come back to the room by counting up from one to five and opening my eyes.” When you practise self-hypnosis the imagery you use and the suggestions you give yourself are only limited by your imagination.
Main Points Hypnosis is a serious therapeutic tool that can help people overcome many psychological, emotional and even some physical problems. It is not mindcontrol, brain-washing, sleep, unconsciousness or a peculiar, altered or mystical state. When in hypnosis a person is aware, in control and can come out of hypnosis when s/he wishes to. It is a natural and harmless state. 14
Self-hypnosis can modify behaviour, emotions and attitudes. It can be used to increase confidence and develop new skills. It can help to reduce stress and anxiety, and can even help people overcome habits such as smoking and overeating. Self-hypnosis is also used by sportspeople to enhance their athletic performance. If you are experiencing any medical or psychological problems, however, it is essential to seek the advice of a doctor or competent therapist before using self-hypnosis. Avoid eating a large meal just before practicing self-hypnosis so you don’t feel bloated or uncomfortable. Unless you wish to doze, sit in a chair, as lying down on a bed will likely induce sleep. You may also wish to loosen tight clothing and take off your shoes. If you wear contact lenses, it is advisable to remove them. Keep your legs and feet uncrossed. Remember, failing to achieve a goal does not mean you are a failure. It may be that you need to approach the goal in a different way or perhaps you need to be persistent. Practise self-hypnosis on a regular basis. Relax and take your time. Accept the pace at which you achieve results, however small they may seem at first. Believe in yourself and you will go on to achieve the success you desire.
Post-hypnotic suggestions Here are some post-hypnotic suggestions you can use in your self-hypnosis. Feel free to alter them to fit your particular needs. Each and every day I am calm, secure and relaxed. I am becoming more assertive and confident when I speak to colleagues. Each and every day I accept myself as I am. Each and every time I enter hypnosis I relax more deeply. I find it easy to stop smoking. I eat three healthy meals a day.
Three other simple self-hypnosis techniques Each one of these self-hypnosis techniques works equally well.
Technique One
Begin by focusing your attention on your breathing. Simply listen to your breathing, and notice how, after a while, it begins to slow down and deepen of 15
its own accord. Notice what happens as you begin to breathe out for longer than you breathe in. Close your eyes whenever you feel ready to do so. Each time you breathe out, say the word “calm” to yourself in your mind. After a few moments, begin to see the word “calm” in your mind’s eye as you breathe out. Continue seeing and hearing the word “calm” in your mind, letting it fade away naturally as you mentally rehearse your preferred future, or simply enjoy the deepening sensation of relaxation. When you are ready to return to the room, open your eyes.
Technique Two
As before, start by paying attention to your breathing, and allow your eyes to close when you are ready. As you breathe out, imagine a sensation of pure relaxation at the top of your head. Now as you breathe out, imagine that sensation of relaxation travelling down from the top of your head and across the muscles of your face. Continue by imagining that sensation travelling down into every part of your body, from your neck and shoulders, down into your arms, hands and fingers, and onwards all the way down to your toes. Repeat twice more, imagining the sensation growing a little deeper each time. Lead into mental rehearsal or simply spend some time just enjoying the deep relaxation that you have created through the power of your imagination. Gently bring yourself to everyday awareness by counting from 1 to 5.
Technique Three
As before, start by allowing your eyes to close when they’re ready, and become aware of your breathing. Begin to build up a mental image of a place where you feel calm, safe, in control, or otherwise positive and resourceful. This could be a real place, such as a favourite holiday destination, or it could be purely imaginary. Start by mentally listing all the things you can see in this place. Move on to explore all the other senses in this place – what can you hear, touch, even taste and smell there? As in the previous techniques, enjoy this experience for the relaxation that it has to offer, or use it to lead into hypnotic rehearsal.
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The Power of Trance in Self-hypnotism Self-hypnosis is a rewarding and effective state of mind. However, be sure to allow yourself patience and time to process your experiences. There is no right way to go about performing self-hypnosis. You may not be successful at first, but if you are consistent and if you believe in what self-hypnosis has to offer, you will be surprised with the types of results that you can achieve. The word trance is used to describe any state where a person is not fully conscious, and unable, to a large extent, to respond to the changes happening around him. Down the ages, the general idea has been that when you are under a hypnotic trance, you are only half conscious and completely unable to respond to any stimuli. But nothing can be more far from the truth. In fact, being in a hypnotic trance is almost like being super-focused on a subconscious level, where the surroundings have been tuned out to a certain extent. What this brings about is an intense feeling of relaxation, and an ability to accept what is being told to you in this state. It is however, important to note, that you still retain your logical faculties, and if your brain so desires, it can actually reject the suggestions made to it, even while it is in an induced trance! But, the question that arises is, why should you consider this? Let us try to answer that.
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How being in a trance can help? Human beings depend to a large extent on the faculty of memory. In fact, morality, or even our principles are actually resting on prior experiences. And gleaned from these prior experiences, we arrive at what is called our individual belief systems. While this very belief system helps to keep you on track, and to take decisions, it is also one of the most limiting influences on the brain. However, when you are under an induced hypnotic trance, your belief systems are suspended, and your brain is in a state to accept the suggestions made to it, even if they go against your belief system. Hypnotic trance can be used therapeutically for this very ability of it to bypass your belief systems and create new beliefs. In fact, when you are in a deep hypnotic trance, suggestion and instruction can actually:
Make you do physical actions that you have no control over
Change your mind set to a great extent
Alter or modify very stubborn beliefs and ideas that you have, and
Most importantly, bring about or boost physical and mental healing in cases like overeating, binge eating or smoking.
While going to a professional trance-hypnotist may be one option, trying out self-hypnosis wouldn’t be a very bad idea, either. Don’t worry – you won’t turn into a clucking duck and be stuck that way! It is quite a safe thing to practice, especially for mental and physical relaxation! So now, let’s look at the procedure…
Self-inducing a Hypnotic Trance You can achieve a safe and relaxing hypnotic trance by following these easy steps: 1. Firstly, you need to find some peace and quiet. Sit comfortably in a room, with the lights dimmed. Ensure you will not be disturbed. 2. Now for focus – this is important if you want to tune out everything else. Find anything – a mark on the wall, an actual physical object, or even the corner of a picture and concentrate your attention on that point or spiral. 18
3. While you are focusing on one point, keep repeating these lines every 30 seconds to yourself: “My eyelids are becoming heavier and heavier” “My eyelids feel as if heavy weights are pulling them down” “Soon they will be so heavy that they will close” 4. You should start feeling the effects of the lines you chant now, and your eyes will really start feeling heavy. Do not resist this. Eventually your eyes will close on their own. Let this happen, and repeat to yourself “Relax and let go.” 5. Thereafter, take in a large deep breath and hold it for about 10 seconds. 6. Exhale through the mouth, slowly, and while making a whooshing sound. The rest of this step isn’t easy and will take some effort to master: 7. While your jaw drops, feel a sense of warmth spread through you. Breathe deeply and repeat the word “calm” when you exhale. This state is in itself relaxing, and can be induced if stress relief or relaxation is the goal in itself. But to get the other benefits, like healing, you will need to deepen the trance.
Deepening the Hypnotic Trance When you’re already in a light trance, it is the right time to deepen it. Follow these steps: 1.
You have to make your mind believe that you want to go deeper, so take another deep breath and exhale after holding it for 10 seconds. When exhaling, repeat the word “deeper” to yourself.
2.
Believe that you are going lower, in an elevator of some sort; as in you are descending lower into the state of calm, but not consciously. Repeat “I am sinking slowly into a deeper state of relaxation.”
3.
While you feel this, count down from 10 to 1 for every exhalation.
4.
The deeper you can descend, the better will be the results.
But one thing to consider is that you will probably not manage it on the very first try. It takes practice and perseverance. While the induced state will bring you peace, and you can also use suggestions to get other benefits, you cannot perpetually exist in this state – you must emerge from it after each session.
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Coming out of the Trance Here’s a simple way in which you can emerge from the trance, but continue to feel the relaxation even beyond that. 1. 2.
Tell yourself: “When I reach one, my eyes will open and I will feel totally awake and refreshed.” Then count slowly from 5 to 1.
Trance hypnosis can be a very powerful tool to overcome many of the problems in life. It can bring you relaxation and acceptance; it can also help you to deal with certain physical conditions. So try it and remember that practice will make you better.
Using hypnotic spirals – Part One Hypnosis is a light "trance"--a state somewhere between sleeping and waking. People in a hypnotic trance are typically very focused on one stimulus to the exclusion of others. People in a hypnotic trance are also somewhat suggestible, although they are by no means unable to control themselves and continue to bear full responsibility for their actions. There are several ways to induce a hypnotic trance. Some of the more popular ones include the hypnosis spiral, the use of an object that glitters such as a piece of jewellery or a gold watch, and progressive relaxation.
Hypnosis Spiral As the title suggests, a hypnosis spiral is a constantly moving spiral pattern. Hypnosis spirals are available on many websites dealing with trance induction. Some of them are available for free download; others must be purchased. Once you have obtained a hypnosis spiral, induce trance by having your subject keep his or her eyes on it for several minutes. While the subject is doing this, you can deepen the trance by playing relaxing music or offering suggestions that the subject is becoming sleepy, that his or her limbs and eyelids are becoming heavy, etc. A hypnosis spiral can also be used to test a person's ability to be hypnotized. Have your would-be subject watch the spiral for thirty seconds. After that, have your subject look at the palm of his or her hand. If the subject sees no abnormalities in the spiral or the hand, he or she will probably be quite difficult 20
to hypnotize. On the other hand, the subject who sees the spiral start to change colours and sees an increase in size in his or her hand is probably quite suggestible and easy to hypnotize.
Bright Objects Another way to induce trance is to hold a bright object, such as a sparkly piece of jewellery, just above the subject's eye level and tell the subject to keep his or her eyes on it. Eventually, the eyes will become weary and the eyelids will become heavy. The hypnotist then steps in with suggestions that the subject is feeling sleepy, cannot keep his or her eyes open, etc.
Progressive Relaxation A final way to induce hypnotic trance, favoured in the psychotherapeutic and medical community, is progressive relaxation. Speaking in a calm, authoritative voice, the hypnotist instructs the subject to first tense, then relax, every major muscle group starting with the toes. By the time the hypnotist reaches the muscles in the neck and face, the subject will be in a deep, relaxed trance.
Putting Yourself Into a Trance Achieving a trance state in self-hypnosis Hypnosis can be described as a state of deep relaxation where the hypnotised subject experiences a heightened level of awareness coupled with a narrowing of their focus of attention. This hypnotic state is called trance and is a perfectly safe state which can occur naturally during everyday life. In self-hypnosis we aim to deliberately put ourselves into a hypnotic trance. To be in a trance does not mean to be asleep, although it can sometimes look that way, but in fact the opposite is true. Studies of the brain activity of people in trance have revealed an increased level of alertness. Hypnosis is a very personal experience and it should be remembered that each individual will experience trance in his or her own way. First find a quiet place where you won't be disturbed, and begin by getting comfortable and relaxed. Use deep breathing and progressive relaxation techniques to get as deeply relaxed as you can. There is no fixed method for trance induction, in fact there are many hundreds of different techniques which have been used effectively. The following are 21
some common and proven examples of techniques and any combination can be used to enter trance, whichever you find works best for you.
Breathing Exercises and Relaxation Breathing and Relaxation techniques for self-hypnosis One proven method of achieving complete relaxation is deep breathing. This is an ancient method favoured by yoga masters and is a useful and enjoyable way to begin self-hypnosis. Our normal everyday breathing is typically rather shallow and rapid, and usually involves expanding and contracting the chest. However, deep, diaphragmatic breathing is healthier and comes from the abdomen. In diaphragmatic breathing you allow your belly to expand outwards as you inhale, pulling the diaphragmatic membrane beneath your lungs downwards and allowing your lungs to draw in air to fill the space. Inhale slowly through the nose and exhale slowly through the mouth. This kind of slow, deep, rhythmic breathing triggers a 'relaxation response' in the body, the opposite of the adrenaline-fuelled ‘fight or flight' response. Some of the beneficial changes that occur as part of this type of relaxation are reduced heart rate, increased blood flow to the extremities, and muscular relaxation.
An exercise in breathing Begin by taking a deep diaphragmatic breath, inhaling through your nose, for a count of three. Now, having filled your lungs, hold your breath for a count of three. Exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of six. Wait for a count of four and repeat the breathing cycle again. Always keep your breathing comfortable and relaxing. Don't inhale so deeply that your lungs hurt or burn. If you feel dizzy or light-headed at any time stop for a while and then continue. This exercise in breathing can be done anywhere and anytime, and can be used to help counter tension or pressure. Take five of these slow, deep, relaxing breaths as preparation for self-hypnosis.
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Progressive Relaxation Progressive relaxation is a system of relaxation developed by Edmund Jacobson and means focusing separately, and progressively, on each of the muscle groups in your body in turn, and allowing any tension held in those muscles to be released. Jacobson designed this technique based on the argument that "an anxious mind cannot exist within a relaxed body". Particular attention should be given to the neck, shoulders and facial muscles as these areas can hold a great deal of tension. Active progressive relaxation involves tensing each muscle group as you inhale, holding the tension for a few seconds, and then gradually releasing the tension completely as you slowly fully exhale. This can be done for each muscle group in turn until the whole body is relaxed. The main muscle groups which can be relaxed in this way are; legs and feet, arms and hands, back shoulders and neck, stomach and chest, buttocks, face and head. Passive progressive relaxation is similar to the above, except that it does not require you to actively tense your muscles at all. Instead you simply imagine the tension flowing out of your body with each breathe you exhale, working progressively around your body as before. It can help to visualise the tension as a kind of liquid which drains away out of your body as you breathe. This is a comfortable and easy method of relaxation which can be done almost anywhere. Once you are fully relaxed, remember how it feels, and create an image in your mind that describes your relaxed state. This will help you to return to this state of relaxation again more easily in future. Deep relaxation is an excellent way to prepare for self-hypnosis.
Eye Fixation With your eyes open, focus your attention on any small spot or object in front of you and above your line of sight. Keep focussing on the spot and direct all your attention towards it, clearing your mind of all other thoughts and distractions. Continue breathing deeply and slowly, and begin suggesting to yourself how relaxed you feel, and how tired your eyes are becoming. Allow yourself to keep relaxing more and more and eventually, when your eyes become tired and heavy, you can close them.
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Utilise Tension It is possible to enter a trance state even when you find it impossible to relax. If you are finding it impossible to let go of tension or anxiety, psychologist Michael Yapko in his book 'Trancework' (1990) describes how you can utilize your current stressed, anxious or tense state as a focus for entering trance. You simply allow and accept your present state of mind, whilst beginning to think back to a time when you were involved in an experience of calmness, comfort, or relaxation and absorption, such that you didn't pay any attention to things going on around you. In doing this you can allow your feelings and responses to move towards those remembered from this past experience.
Visualisation Visualisation is one of the most powerful tools in self-hypnosis. Use visualisation and imagery to create images in your mind that suggest relaxation, for example, lying on a beach or walking in a forest. Allow your imagination to flow naturally and let yourself become absorbed by your mental images as you enter trance.
Stairway to relaxation This is another example of imagery, and one that is often used to deepen the level of relaxation. Imagine yourself at the top of a beautiful staircase, there may be 10 steps to the bottom. The stairs lead to the most beautiful, wonderful and relaxing place you can imagine, which may be real or fantasised. Imagine descending the staircase, counting down the steps as you descend, and with each step suggesting to yourself an increased feeling of relaxation and a deepening of the hypnotic trance. As you reach the bottom you will be as deeply relaxed as you can be.
Physical Responses Creating a perceived physical response to hypnosis is a way to focus your attention inwards even further. Use suggestions and imagination to create a physical feeling or sensation in your body. For example, imagine warmth, or numbness, or heaviness, or lightness in your hand. Feeling the physical response occurring will indicate achieving a level of self-hypnosis.
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Emotional Responses Sometimes people find themselves so immersed and preoccupied with an emotional feeling that they find it difficult to use imagery. Strong emotions such as grief, anger or fear can be overwhelming, but may be utilised to help enter hypnosis. In this case, try to develop an image in the mind like a scene from a movie in which you are the main character. Focus on your current emotions and observe the movie of your current situation, allowing your character to experience all the feelings you are presently having. By becoming absorbed in the movie as an observer, and maintaining a detached awareness, you will soon discover that you have entered trance. When you are ready, you can extend your movie towards working on your goals.
Utilise Distractions Where possible, incorporate distracting sounds in your suggestions, rather than trying to fight them. Notice any external sounds that you can hear and then allow them to be included in your suggestions for relaxation. Similarly, internal distractions such as worries, pains or self-doubt can be focussed on and used to help deepen your self-hypnosis. Of course, some distractions will require your attention immediately, such as the doorbell ringing or a child requiring attention. In these cases deal with the distraction satisfactorily and then return to your selfhypnosis. Self-hypnosis is a very personal and individual experience and different methods will feel more comfortable for different people. Techniques such as those above can be changed and adapted to suit the individual. Self-hypnosis is a natural skill which can be developed and made easier with practice.
Imagery in Self-Hypnosis Using guided imagery and positive visualisation in self-hypnosis Imagery can mean visualisation - using your imagination to form pictures in your mind. However, it can also include all the senses of sight, sound, taste smell and feel. Whilst most people are predominantly visual in their use of imagery, the most powerful and effective guided visualisation will incorporate elements from all the senses. In self-hypnosis a mental image is often worth many pages of verbal suggestions. You can use your own memories and experiences to construct your own highly personal imagery to reinforce your suggestions for change. 25
The following exercises can be used to practice and develop your imagery skills;
Examine an object for a few moments, then close your eyes and try and visualise it.
Visualise a person you know (maybe yourself). Imagine their distinguishing features.
Visualise your home. Move around it from room to room and imagine what it looks, sounds, feels and smells like.
There are two principal ways of using imagery to work towards a goal; Process Imagery is the visualisation of the process or actions of achieving the goal you desire. For example, a golfer might imagine executing a perfect shot as he approaches the ball. Result Imagery creates mental pictures of the goal or result as if it has already occurred. If you are giving a talk to colleagues, you might imagine yourself confidently delivering the speech, hear the applause and imagine the positive outcome of your successful presentation. A 1967 study by stress researcher Edmund Jacobson found that visualising an activity produces small but measurable reactions in the muscles involved in the imagined activity. Repeated mental rehearsal implants the learned memory of a successful action, and also conditions the unconscious mind with the outcome you expect to achieve. Suppose, for example, your goal is to lose weight. You could use result imagery to imagine yourself as the size and weight you want to be. Mentally picture yourself in the mirror looking trim and as thin as you wish, fitting neatly into the dress or suit size you want to achieve. Imagine the feeling of being your ideal weight. You may also use process imagery to imagine yourself eating smaller, healthier portions of food. You might picture yourself feeling full whilst leaving food still on your plate. These images will reinforce the positive processes you will go through to achieve your desired result. Visualisation and imagination are closely related to the unconscious mind. In fact, imagery has been described as the language of the unconscious. The key to successful use of imagery is to be as creative and imaginative as you can. Use your own memories and experiences and fill your images with colours, sounds, aromas, textures and tastes to be as real and as absorbing as they can be. Keep 26
your visualisations positive and personally appealing to be a powerful tool in self-hypnosis.
Self-hypnosis Spirals (Part Two) Spirals and concentration To effectively self-hypnotise, your consciousness has to close out external distractions and sensory stimuli that may help to bring your focus outward onto the external world. When you're in this situation , however the mind is not entirely oblivious to the world around it- if something is there in the exterior world which may be a danger or necessitates an immediate reply, the mind's survival mechanisms will flick out of this inner, self-reflective state. The Self-hypnosis spiral images is good at keeping this focus inward as all of the implied movement, along the spiral's arms, has a tendency to lead the eye, and the mind, back to the same point again. It's also regular, and unchanging- a feature which is basically boosted by the animating the spiral image. This dearth of modification is a handy trick which permits the brain to hop away from itthere is nothing new to take in and understand, so that the mind's focus can be elsewhere, inner. At that point, you are able to understand nothing but what you wish to visualise. You may find that having exploited the spiral as a help to get yourself to this point, you can now dispense with it, closing your eyes and focussing entirely on your inner visualization. The outer world is gone, and with it the tensions and distractions it brings. At this point, the only stimuli which work on you are those you opt to create, such as healing images, certainly pictured scenarios or scenarios, and phrases or suggestions which your intellect can then decide to adopt, and to believe in. The mind is really potent when its focus is in one place, the sector of pure thought. These affirmation, suggestion and self-imaging techniques help you to harness this power, to use it on yourself and to return back to a wakeful state, when you're prepared to do, refreshed and invigorated. When you are self-hypnotising, you are trying to deliberately block out the external world, to allow your intelligence time and a neutral space to perceive, and work on itself. Employing a Self-hypnosis- spiral images can help you do that, to put your focus on one thing and then, when the body is truly relaxed, take even that away, leaving you with nothing except yourself.
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Working with erotic hypnotic spirals One of my passions is erotic self-hypnosis. I know this comes as no surprise to all of you, but I often feel the need to express my passion over and over again, in many different ways. I love having the ability to use my words to better someone’s life, to change their thoughts completely, to make them do things that they could not do without any guidance. I love being able to help a person explore their deepest fetishes, and make them feel as if they are a reality. I love the control, the power, the pure electric bliss that comes from being a playboy or girl who excels at the art of erotic self-hypnosis. I already know the powerful effect that words have on minds and bodies, especially if you have been training yourself with my EBooks on the subject, or have participated in phone or text erotic hypnosis talks with me. Your mind and your body are gradually trained, shortly after reading my EBooks and as such having listened to me, will be trained to respond to your own words in self-hypnosis. They will be trained to a imaginary commands, and hypnotic suggestions and hypnosis triggers, if for a great deal of your life having visited bight clubs and dark rooms. Even as you are reading my words, you may find that your conscious mind starts to wander, yet your subconscious mind, I can assure you, will be picking up exactly what you want to do. There is nothing you have to do to experience this, other than just read my instructions as above in this EBook and others of mine, in a way listen to my voice, and continue to feel yourself letting go in the world you very much want to be. Understanding that there comes a time when it is just so much easier for you to go ahead in this fantastic world whether you are young or old.
Self-hypnosis and the Healing Trance State Wonderful if you had the power to rid yourself of so much negativity as anxiety to what people would think about your way of life, and as such getting rid of bad habits and have a more positive outlook on your life as you wish it to be? Guess what? You do! By learning simple self-hypnosis techniques, you can rid yourself of everyday stressors, get rid of paranoia and mellow out after a long day of work. There’s no need to get any fancy gadgets or a pocket watch to hypnotize yourself with; all you need is yourself, a comfortable outfit and a peaceful place – whether it be your bedroom or somewhere cosy even in nature. Are you interested in learning more about healing yourself through self-hypnosis and a meditative state, delve into the powers of your subconscious mind? 28
The process of self-hypnosis, we already know from this EBook that it is quite simple, but like everything it does take a bit of dedication. The hypnosis in itself is not a cure-all. It’s simply a way of accessing your inner mind, the healing comes from within. 1. Change into your most comfortable clothing, or taking it all off if a good temperature permits. Don’t anything hinder you. You’ll have a hard time getting into a trance-like state if you’re constantly fidgeting with an itchy wool sweater or an uncomfortable waistband. Think a comfy t-shirt and sweatpants, or whatever you’d feel comfortable sleeping in. (Personally, I go for a lose T-shirt and a short.) 2. Find a place that is completely silent. You want to be far away from your roommates watching television, your significant other practicing guitar or your children whining. If you are lucky enough to be home alone, choose your favourite room of the house. If you have a house full of people it is still possible to practice self-hypnosis, yet you may want to find a peaceful place outdoors if possible. Make sure the temperature of the room is comfortable before beginning, this is very important. No hinderness. 3. Sit or lie down on a comfortable chair or couch (if you’re outdoors, find a nice patch of grass or moss). Make sure you’re not in an unusual position; if you cross your legs, you may find this uncomfortable halfway through the process. Make sure that wherever you decide to place yourself, and whatever position you decide to be in, that you can maintain this spot for at least fifteen minutes, longer if necessary. 4. Determine why it is that you are practicing self-hypnosis. Are you trying to rid yourself of an addiction, get rid of anxiety or simply relax after a long day or have some sexual fun which is your right? Before beginning your trance, repeat to yourself what you want to achieve, this is very important. If you’re trying to quit smoking, say something along the lines of “I am stronger than my addiction to nicotine. I don’t want to smoke anymore. I have the power to quit smoking.” 5. Close your eyes and begin to relax your body, starting from your neck and leading down to your toes. Rid your mind of all negative thoughts; push anxiety, fear and hesitation out of your brain as they do not belong there. Feel your muscles relaxing one by one. First your arms, then your fingers, then your thighs, etc. If you find it hard to relax your body, try to imagine 29
warm water trickling over your body. As soon as water hits a certain part of your body, it relaxes. 6. Take deep breaths, slow and steady. When you inhale, imagine positivity flowing through your body. When you exhale, imagine yourself releasing all of the negativity held inside. 7. In order to reach a state of hypnotic trance, you must begin to use your imagination. Begin by visualizing something simple, such as taking a big bite out of a juicy watermelon. How does the watermelon look, taste, feel? Try to include all five senses in your visualization. Once you have successfully visualized eating something sweet and juicy, move on to something a little more complicated. Imagine yourself somewhere incredibly serene. Maybe you’re slowly descending into beautiful, clear, warm water, or maybe you’re lying in a field full of your favourite flowers. Imagine that you are weightless, carefree, without a worry in the world. Really immerse yourself in this scenario, and forget about everything else around you. 8. Once you have entered into a peaceful state of mind, don’t let this go. Begin by repeating to yourself the phrases you started out with. “I am stronger than my addiction. Peace and happiness are flowing through me. I am free of worries.” etc. etc. Whatever you’re trying to fix, stick with that particular issue. Trying to fix too many issues at once can be overwhelming. 9. Now imagine yourself truly living without that problem. Imagine a couple little boxes popping up around you. You open one box, and insert all of your problems into it. Lock it up and make it disappear. You open the next box, and take out happiness and peace and tranquillity, or whatever else you like. Let yourself truly feel these emotions. 10.Let yourself wander around this peaceful world you have created for yourself until you feel as though you are ready to exit the hypnotic state. Feel free to repeat the chosen phrases to yourself as many times as you think is necessary. If you have chosen to imagine yourself under water, imagine yourself slowly rising up out of the water. If you have chosen to imagine yourself in a field, imagine yourself slowly walking out of the field back into the real world. You may want to imagine yourself walking through a door full of light before opening your eyes, but when you feel ready, open them. 30
You already know from this EBook and other writings of mine that this technique is not the only technique out there that will get you into a hypnotic trance. As I practice self-hypnotism and other skills as radiesthesia, lucid dreaming, affirmative self-talk even, new and valuable methods are introduced and experienced. Maybe you don’t want to imagine yourself submerged in water or laying in a field, and that’s alright. But, rather find yourself in a bedroom, bathroom, a darkroom of a night bar, your garden, the terrace of your penthouse, cellar or garage, anywhere appropriate for sexual fun. The point is to get yourself into a place where you feel completely free, peaceful and relaxed. If that’s on top of a mountain, so be it. If it’s laying in a room filled with clouds, that’s alright too. Use whatever visualizations necessary to get yourself where you need to be. It’s important to continue to repeat this process until you feel yourself ridding your body and mind of its ailments whatever they are. You do want happiness. The more you practice and the more dedicated you are to self-hypnosis, the faster you will begin to see results. Remember: the path to healing and happiness is all up to you.
Trance Trance, we know, is a state where this critical thinking is switched off (or at least its effect on the person's ability to control his/her own thoughts is lessened), where suggestions can induce a dream like state, the person accepts a suggestion as if it was his/her own idea and wants to play around with that idea. It's a dream like state because in a dream we don't question where our ideas come from, normally we believe everything what we dream, this also explains why authority/trust (as a doctor for example) is related to hypnosis/suggestions, when we are talking to an authority (or someone we trust), we suspend our critical thinking because we know that the other person wants what is best for us or for some other reason ( perhaps authority equals a learned response to a que the authority - which says that critical thinking must be suspended) while in trance the person can explore ideas and experiences that would be impossible when not in trance because the person would not let himself/herself to be lead to those experiences - he/she would be too resistant to go there to begin with. There is a sort of critical thinking in the brain that is goal oriented and uses logic and reasoning to filter how a conversation goes and where should be a person's attention, so this critical, goal oriented thinking is governing the persons attention and what he/she should imagine or enjoy imagining. 31
As stated on the Imagination page: A hypnotic trance state manifests whenever the focus of attention is inside the body, and what we experience is being provided by our imagination in reaction to suggestion instead of reaction from the senses. The reason we can be hypnotized at all is because it was discovered that the outside input that we will automatically react to, can be in the form of a suggestion. When the natural trance state is enabled, we can amplify it into a hypnotic trance state by providing suggestions that internalize the focus of attention, and require the imagination to provide the reaction to suggestion. These are the shifts that occur when going from our natural trance state to a hypnotic trance state. (and thus why I refer to them as mental states). 1. Since our focus of attention is internal to our body, and the imagination is now providing the input to be reacted to (from suggestion) input from our peripheral awareness starts becoming diminished. 2. Since the outside input from our peripheral awareness has been replaced by input from the imagination, our ability to tell what is real and true in the world also becomes diminished. More accurately, our ability to disbelieve becomes diminished... Everything becomes true. (Just like before the age of 7 or 8 when we were found out about Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy.. etc.) (It's this ability to tell what is real and true in the world is what I define the critical faculty (or factor) to be). The value of everything being true is that we have a natural ability to automatically adapt to whatever we believe is real. It's one of the reasons we are at the top of the food chain. Think about getting into a cool swimming pool or a hot tub... when you first get in... it's Ohhh! uncomfortable... then in just moments, we adapt to the new reality.
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That's how fast we adapt to whatever we believe is real. With a hypnotic trance state, EVERYTHING is real... So when in a hypnotic trance state, and two conditions exist, we automatically react to suggestion... and our body automatically adapts to the new reality. The two conditions that need to exist in order for us to automatically react to suggestion while in hypnotic trance state are: 1. We have to know how to react. (if I asked you to start dextroboping... what you would do?) 2. There has to be no reason not to. (This is your natural protection.) But; if these two conditions do exist... you will automatically react to a suggestion, and your body will automatically adapt to the new reality. These automatic reactions are what are most commonly called “trance effects” which are automatic reactions to suggestion. It takes an existing natural trance state to enable a hypnotic state, because the hypnotic state is simply an amplified version of our natural trance state. This is true even with instant inductions. In this model, the thing that ties the two trance states together; what makes them both “trance” states; is their common utilization of our natural ability to automatically react to input without the involvement of the intellect. With a natural trance state, the outside input is from the senses via our peripheral awareness. With a hypnotic trance state, the outside input is from suggestion (automatic reaction to input from our senses via our peripheral awareness is diminished)
To remember Critical thinking suspended: Trance is a state where this critical thinking is switched off (or at least its effect on the person's ability to control his/her own thoughts is lessened), where suggestions can induce a 33
dream like state, the person accepts a suggestion as if it was his/her own idea and wants to play around with that idea. It's a dream like state because in a dream we don't question where our ideas come from, normally we believe everything what we dream. Authority: This also explains why authority/trust (as a doctor for example) is related to hypnosis/suggestions, when we are talking to an authority (or someone we trust), we suspend our critical thinking because we know that the other person wants what is best for us or for some other reason ( perhaps authority equals a learned response to a que - the authority - which says that critical thinking must be suspended ) Energy barrier lowered : While in trance the person can explore ideas and experiences that would be impossible when not in trance because the person would not let himself/herself to be lead to those experiences he/she would be too resistant to go there to begin with. After trance. The person can use the experiences experienced while in trance / guided imagination to change behaviour, attitude, way of life, and understanding of world.
Someone argued I am a beginner trying out self-hypnosis, and already have been given much good advice here. I wondered about trance depth in self-hypnosis - it is tricky for me to understand what I am experiencing since I have only ever hypnotised myself! I seem to experience a number of states which feel like a uneven continuum - what I mean is that there are progressions and then sudden bumps into a new state. A very light state, where I feel very relaxed but can move about easily. A slightly deeper state, where my body feels heavy, but I know I could move if I wanted to, but just don't feel like it! In this state if I say something to myself like "one of your fingers will begin to twitch, but I don't know which one", then it will slowly start to do this. It begins like a tingle, and then slowly begins to be a proper random twitch, and I never know which finger it will be. I have also suggested that my hand is tied to a balloon and gone very light, and it does rise, which really freaks me out a little. Again, this happens very slowly. A deep state, where I simply can't move my arms or legs: it is not a resistance, it feels like they have become detached from my body, and I try to move them but nothing happens. My mind becomes very calm and still and I don't notice what is going on around me. I feel warm and 34
comfortable, and I don't always feel like coming out immediately - it just feels too cosy! I count myself up, but I find that I have just ignored myself! If I get really still, I can suggest to myself that I will no longer be able to count down from 300, and as I count down it is as if the numbers float away, and I just end up drifting away from the task too. In this state I can easily lose my sense of time, thinking I have been in a trance for ten minutes and it turns out to be half an hour or more! Recently, I have felt a real pull downwards from state three (third paragraph) and I am not sure I like it and have stopped myself from going there. My mind becomes so still that I am unable to use my inner voice anymore. I might be saying something to myself, and the words sort of drift away, and then I realise I have completely forgotten what I was going to say and indeed my mind has gone still and blank. At the same time my body starts to feel really leaden, creeping up from my toes. Since my inner voice is leaving me, I get scared that I won't be able to get out of the trance, and indeed it is quite hard work. My question is - do other people experience similar things during self-hypnosis? I'm enjoying the sense of stillness and relaxation it gives me, but in particular I don't know where this latest state is leading me. I read everywhere that I will always be able to get out of trance again, but if you haven't had the experience it is hard to just trust that everything will be fine. I am just exploring, but I often suddenly find myself slipping down before I even notice it.
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Erotic Self-hypnosis Erotic hypnosis or self-hypnosis is the use of hypnosis practices for sensual or sexual purposes. Erotic hypnosis is also referred to as recreational hypnosis (which, by the way, isn’t necessarily always sexual in nature, but more on that later). Erotic hypnosis is different than hypnotherapy which utilizes hypnosis in a therapeutic environment to provide treatment to a patient for a variety of different issues (some of which could be sexual in nature, but not necessarily). So, when you talk about the “fetish” of “sexual/erotic hypnosis,” you are most likely referring to recreational hypnosis used for sexual pleasure as the ultimate goal. Now, to clarify, hypnosis is sometimes used by trained therapists to treat sexual dysfunction (almost always in combination with other psychotherapeutic approaches or treatments). In fact, some research supports the use of hypnotic techniques in sex therapy as more effective than those without hypnosis. In this particular answer, however, the discussion is limited to your specific question regarding hypnosis used for erotic purposes. For those of you unfamiliar with the practice, hypnosis is a technique used to induce a trance-like state where you are very relaxed, focused, and more open to suggestion than usual. Contrary to popular belief, during hypnosis, your free will remains intact. That is, you don’t lose control over your behaviour. Hypnosis is utilized for a variety of reasons: to gain control over certain behaviours (e.g., to quit smoking), alter perception (e.g., pain control), or modify emotions (e.g., reducing stress). Hypnotherapy is considered a safe complementary and alternative medical treatment when performed by a trained therapist. When hypnosis is performed by someone who is not certified or who has never undergone training (this includes individuals performing hypnosis on themselves, an activity called self-hypnosis), the chances of adverse effects is increased. Risks associated with hypnosis are very rare, but can include: headache, dizziness, nausea, anxiety, and the creation of false memories. Recreational hypnosis most often refers to erotic hypnosis; hence, why the two terms are most often used synonymously. However, some people enjoy the process of hypnosis, going in and out of trance, unrelated to sex play and with no apparent therapeutic goal. This is still referred to as recreational hypnosis. As mentioned before, during hypnosis, your free will remains intact; however, it’s worth keeping in mind that erotic hypnosis can have a powerful effect on a person’s perception as well as an influence on their behaviour. You will want to be careful how you use it — people might regret or be troubled by the actions they perform while under hypnosis. 36
People may use erotic hypnosis for the following reasons: Reducing inhibitions related to sexual activities. Increasing arousal or sensuality. Hypnotic fantasy. Within a dominant/submissive relationship to support power exchange.
Sex and Meditation are the same to the Brain A new study suggests that your brain reacts the same way to meditation as it does to sex. Self-hypnosis, entering trance, lucid dreaming and meditation are the same techniques. All dissolve our sense of self-awareness, separating ourselves from our ego. Sex is an act of give and take — giving yourself fully and unapologetically and allowing the same space for your partner. Sex also creates an energetic connection between you and your partner that goes beyond the physical. The more you understand and recognize your own presence, needs and wants, the deeper the experience will be for you and your partner. This can almost be said for any aspect of life. By having an awareness of your own emotions and connection, you can help your partner to share that awareness, ensuring that the sex you are about to partake in brings you both together. When you meditate, the left side of your brain lights up and when you have sex, the right side of your brain lights up -- both experiences leading to a stoppage of mental chatter in your brain and helping you lose physical and mental boundaries. The meditation techniques in use in religions, metaphysics, including yoga have the same practices, entering the silence of your inner self, starting reflective meditation on your chosen theme. This is taught by the late psychologist Dr. Roberto Assagioli, MD, Firenze, Italy. He taught psychosynthesis. Wherever you’re starting from, meditation and mindfulness can improve things and sex in surprising ways.
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Here is how! 1. Meditation cuts your stress levels entering the silence Putting aside physical issues or previous abuse, the number one reason why people don’t enjoy their sex life is because they’re feeling stressed and you’re a million miles from feeling relaxed. If you’re stressed, you can’t let go and enjoy life. You’ll be distracted by whatever is stressing you. Even if you’re using sex as a form of stress relief, it still won’t be as good as if you weren’t feeling stressed in the first place. 2. Meditation makes you healthier Healthier people tend to have more stamina and enjoy physical exercise more. I don’t think I need to elaborate! 3. ‘When’ are you? Come back here, Now! We often ask people who look like they’re day-dreaming ‘where’ they are – but perhaps a better question might be ‘when’ they are? If we’re not ‘here’, in this present moment, then we’re either somewhere in the past or hanging around in an as-yet imaginary future. How can you best enjoy those special moments with your partner or partner if you’re not really ‘here’ in the ‘now’? 4. Coming back to your senses Yes, there are definitely emotional, psychological and even spiritual aspects to a good sex life – you have to be ‘in the mood’ – but being ‘in your body’, rather than ‘stuck in your thinking mind’ is a key ingredient for actually noticing what you’re doing, while you’re doing it, and hopefully enjoying it more! 5. Get your monkey mind to shut up, for once! All right, so it might not totally shut up, but at least get it to turn down the volume! Our minds have been trained for decades to evaluate, to critique, to run commentary, to remind us of stuff and to generally chatter away, telling us whichever random story it finds most interesting, in that moment. All rather distracting when you’d rather have your mind on something else! There are, after all, times 38
when remembering to buy dishwasher tablets really isn’t so important. 6. Get your inner critic out of the way No one likes to remind you about your wobbly bits, or that time at college when it went horribly and embarrassingly wrong, than your inner critic. And it’s a fabulous way to make yourself feel selfconscious and insecure – not a great recipe for enjoying that magic moment with someone special. Fortunately regular meditation helps you take back control of your Monkey Mind and helps you to retrain your inner critic to be more of a cheer leader than a wet blanket. 7. You’ll feel more confident and happier Regular meditation helps you to feel more confident, happier, healthier and more vibrantly alive. We all know how much more attractive a confident person is than one who is filled with selfdoubt and worry. There’s nothing wrong with feeling self-doubt and worry, if that’s what floats your boat, but if it’s not where you want to be any more, then it’s time to take action. 8. Breathing in harmony A great sex life starts with a great connection. And one of the fastest ways to connect is to build rapport. As a meditation leader since the 60s under the leadership of Michal Eastcott and Nancy Magor at Sundial House, Tunbridge Wells, Kent, UK, representing myself the French Section of the Meditation Group for the New Age and Creative Meditation Group and in my meditation classes, I can confirm that one of the fastest ways to build rapport with someone – to relax into each other’s presence and to connect at a deep level – is through breathing in rhythm. Breathing in a meditative way is often called ‘pranayama’. It’s a massive area to study, so I won’t dive into it now. Change you limiting beliefs.
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The Energy of whatever Sex For those who are familiar with chakras and body meridians, this energetic component of sex may seem blindingly obvious, “There are 108 energetic meridians in the body, and the biggest one runs from the base of the spine up,” Fletcher explains. According to her, “meditation will start to clear out those channels quite spontaneously, but most of us are pretty blocked in our chakras, and the first block that the energy hits is the sexual chakra. So that energy coming up gets blocked, and then it dissipates and creates arousal.” But putting religion and spirituality aside, the biggest and most immediate benefit of meditation is that it promotes the act of being present. In keeping with our society’s current model of instant gratification, it seems as though sex today is often less about exploring ourselves and our partners and more about completing a task that guarantees a big payoff (to some) in the end. Meditation and presence can change that. When you create the habit of meditating, self-hypnosis, trance and even your preparation to lucid dreaming daily, the act of being present can trickle into other aspects of your life, including between the sheets. When you are fully engaged and present in sex, your chances of achieving long-lasting arousal and orgasm can only increase. By trying this meditation below, you are giving yourself the opportunity to be fully present and aware of yourself and your partner (s), group sex, etc.. You are giving each other a chance to really get to know each other.
Coming to your senses with this meditation technique This exercise puts you so firmly into your body—into the right now—that it’s hard to be stressed. For the first few times, do the meditation seated with your eyes closed, but once you’ve got the hang of it, you could do it as you’re putting on your lingerie, as you’re making the bed, or as you’re showering. 1. Sit with your back supported and your head free. Take a few breaths, close your eyes, and settle in. 2. Then, walk through each of your five senses. 3. Start with what you’re hearing. What’s the most prevalent sound you can detect right now? And then, if you have extra time, listen for the most subtle. 40
4. With the next breath, feel what you’re feeling. What’s the most prevalent tactile sensation you can feel right now? Can you feel the chair beneath you, can you feel your skin beneath your clothes? And then, if you have time, what’s the most subtle? 5. With your next breath, move on to what you’re seeing—and it might just be blackness, or the light coming through your eyelids. And then once you get advanced and can do this with your eyes open, just think, what’s the most beautiful thing you can detect right now? 6. Next breath, what’s the most prevalent smell you can smell right now, and what’s the most subtle? And then do the same for taste. It’s so simple—you’re just walking through each of your senses, and then once you’ve done all five, you want to pull back and see if you can hold all five senses in your awareness at the same time. So hear what you’re hearing, feel what you’re feeling, see what you’re seeing, taste what you’re tasting, and smell what you’re smelling, all at the same time.
Health benefits of sex Regular sex cannot be underestimated as a factor for reducing stress, bolstering self-esteem and fostering feelings of intimacy and bonding between partners. But the real point of this article is the fact that a healthy sex life can provide for a longer, healthier and, most would agree, more enjoyable life. Among the many health benefits of sex are: 1. Improved immunity People who have sex frequently (one or two times a week) have significantly higher levels of immunoglobulin A (IgA). Your IgA immune system is your body's first line of defence. Its job is to fight off invading organisms at their entry points, reducing or even eliminating the need for activation of your body's immune system. This may explain why people who have sex frequently also take fewer sick days. 2. Heart health Men who made love regularly (at least twice a week) were 45 percent less likely to develop heart disease than those who did so once a month or less, according to one study. Sexual activity not only provides many of the same benefits to your heart as exercise but also keeps levels of estrogen and testosterone in balance, which is important for heart health. 41
3. Lower blood pressure Sexual activity, and specifically intercourse, is linked to better stress response and lower blood pressure. 4. It’s a form of exercise Sex helps to boost your heart rate, burn calories and strengthen muscles, just like exercise. In fact, research recently revealed that sex burns about 4 calories a minute for men and 3 for women, making it (at times) a ‘significant’ form of exercise. It can even help you to maintain your flexibility and balance. 5. Pain relief Sexual activity releases pain-reducing hormones and has been found to help reduce or block back and leg pain, as well as pain from menstrual cramps, arthritis and headaches. One study even found that sexual activity can lead to partial or complete relief of headache in some migraine and cluster-headache patients. 6. May help reduce risk of prostate cancer Research has shown that men who ejaculate at least 21 times a month (during sex or masturbation) have a lower risk of prostate cancer.7 This link needs to be explored further, however, as there may have been additional factors involved in the association. 7. Improve sleep After sex, the relaxation-inducing hormone prolactin is released, which may help you to nod off more quickly. The “love hormone” oxytocin, released during orgasm, also promotes sleep. 8. Stress relief Sex triggers your body to release its natural feel-good chemicals, helping to ease stress and boost pleasure, calm and self-esteem. Research also shows that those who have sexual intercourse responded better when subjected to stressful situations like speaking in public.
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9. Boost your libido The more often you have sex, the more likely you are to want to keep doing it. There’s a mental connection there but also a physical one, particularly for women. More frequent sex helps to increase vaginal lubrication, blood flow and elasticity, which in turn make sexual activity more enjoyable. 10. Improved bladder control in women Intercourse helps to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles, which contract during orgasm. This can help women to improve their bladder control and avoid incontinence. You can boost this benefit even more by practicing Kegel exercises during sex (a Kegel squeeze is performed by drawing your lower pelvic muscles up and holding them up high and tight, as if you’re trying to stop a flow of urine). 11. Increase intimacy and improve your relationship Sex and orgasms result in increased levels of the hormone oxytocin -- the “love” hormone -- that helps you feel bonded to your partner, and better experience empathic connections.
Has sex fizzled? Check into the emotional connection Anxiety, defensiveness, fear and failure of communication are destructive psychological forces that can take a heavy toll on your libido, whether you’re a man or a woman, by acting as roadblocks to desire. Stress, too, can dampen your libido and make sex the last thing on your mind (a catch-22, since sex will help to reduce your stress levels significantly). Taking control of your emotions by learning the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) can really help in this area to re-ignite your sex life. EFT is a psychological acupressure technique that can help you effectively address your stress-related thoughts and leave you feeling calmer and more able to face your challenges, whatever they may be, so you’re able to focus on more enjoyable pursuits.
Men, try this before reaching for Viagr Varying degrees of erectile dysfunction (ED) are common in men and can significantly interfere with a healthy sex life. Often, it is simply a manifestation 43
of stress or emotional problems, but it can also be a sign of an underlying health problem like heart disease. It is important that you work on finding out the foundational cause, and also that you resist the urge to simply pop a pill like Viagra as a quick fix. Viagra does carry a risk of potentially serious side effects, including: Headache Upset stomach Flushing of the face Blue/green colour blindness Blurred vision Vision sensitivity to light Sudden decrease or loss of vision in one or both eyes An abnormally long-lasting erection that may cause permanent damage to your penis Sudden loss or decrease in hearing, sometimes with ringing in the ears or dizziness Heart attack, stroke, irregular heartbeat and death have occurred in men taking Viagra As far as natural alternatives go, there are many options to consider including Larginine, an amino acid that is the precursor to nitric oxide, a natural compound that helps relax your blood vessels. Nitric oxide signals the smooth muscle cells in your blood vessels to relax, so that your vessels dilate and your blood flows more freely. This helps your arteries to regain their elasticity and stay free of plaque. L-arginine may also lead to increased microcirculation in genital tissues, which results in stronger erections and better sexual responsiveness, via this nitric oxide mechanism. Scientific studies have shown that L-arginine can be particularly effective when used in combination with another natural agent, pycnogenol, which resulted in significant improvement in sexual function in men with ED, according to a Bulgarian study.10 Similarly, a pilot study published in the journal European Urology found 6 grams of L-arginine combined with 6 mg of yohimbine, a 44
compound found in the herb yohimbe, was successful in treating men with ED.11 Aside from L-arginine, other natural alternatives include: Panax ginseng and maca root, which have been used for centuries as libidoboosting tonics Choline and vitamin B5. The neurotransmitter that triggers sexual messages in your brain, whether you're male or female, is acetylcholine (ACH). With too little ACH, sexual activity goes down. One way to safely and effectively enhance your ACH levels is to take choline supplements (1,000-3,000 mg) and vitamin B5 (500-1,500 mg).
Seven secrets to a healthy sex life for both men and women Are you in a committed relationship and finding your sex life leaves much to be desired? Tending to stress and relationship troubles is important, as discussed, but if that’s not the issue then it could be that your lifestyle is getting in the way. To boost your libido naturally and help restore harmony to your intimate life, use the strategies that follow. Reduce, with the plan of eliminating, grains and sugars in your diet. It is vitally important to eliminate sugars, especially fructose. High levels of sugar in your bloodstream can actually turn off the gene that controls your sex hormones. Eat a healthy diet, and follow a adequate nutrition plan, which will help to normalize your insulin levels. This simple measure has a profound influence on every area of your health, including your sex life. Optimize your vitamin D levels, ideally through appropriate sun exposure as this will allow your body to also create vitamin D sulphate — a factor that may play a crucial role in preventing the formation of arterial plaque that is linked to erectile dysfunction. Exercise regularly. Make sure you incorporate high-intensity interval training exercises, which also optimize your human growth hormone (HGH) production. Avoid smoking or drinking alcohol excessively. Be sure to get plenty of high-quality, restorative sleep. Consider choline and vitamin B5 supplements. The neurotransmitter that triggers the sexual message, in both men and women, is acetylcholine (ACH). With too little ACH, sexual activity goes down. One way to safely and 45
effectively enhance ACH levels in your body is to take choline supplements (1,000-3,000 mg) and vitamin B5 (500-1,500 mg).
Good advice improving sex life There’s no way you’ll enjoy it as much as you would if you were feeling relaxed and happy. Scientists have finally proven what regular meditators have known for thousands of years – that meditation cuts your stress levels and helps you to relax. Researchers have proven that meditation not only cuts your stress levels, but it can lower blood pressure and even strengthen your heart. Your sex life will improve massively if you train yourself – day to day – to live in the moment and to connect, here and now, with yourself and those around you. Then it will already be second nature by the time things start to heat up. Becoming more aware of the sensory experience of life is a wonderful side effect of regular meditation and mindfulness (concentration, attention) practice, so how about making the most of it, when you’re after that sensual experience? Fortunately as little as 10 minutes a day of regular meditation can help you to retrain your Monkey Mind, so it knows who the boss is. And that’s kind of handy, if you want it to shut up and disappear into the background and leave off distracting you! And the benefits of that don’t stop at the bedroom door – just imagine what finally sorting your inner critic could do for you at work or in other areas of your life? As little as a minute or ten of mindfulness (concentration, attention) each day will soon make a difference for you. So there you have it: eight magical ways that meditation and mindfulness (concentration, attention) can help to improve your sex life!
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Does meditation help in the development of self-hypnosis, trance, and lucid dreaming? Firstly meditation will slow your brainwaves into a theta range and sometimes depending on your experience into the delta range, which are heavily associated with dreams and heightened creativity. As with any skill practice makes perfect and the experience you gain from experiencing these hyper-relaxed states while maintaining a conscious awareness can make it easier to activate this awareness in the similarly relaxed and creative dream state. Also after a meditation session your body is already in a relaxed enough state to easily slip into these lowerwave states, hence a much better chance of lucid dreaming using the WILD technique (Wake Induced Lucid Dream: The name says it all: during a WILD, you literally hand-off your awareness from a physically waking state directly into a sleeping lucid dream state.) Meditations which focus on mindfulness (concentration, contemplation, focusing) in particular are essentially a continual reality check. Since what we experience during the day often transfers into the content of our dreams at night by training your mind to become accustomed to maintaining this level of awareness, it makes sense that the habit will show up in your dreams as well. Further to this, the things we experience right before going to sleep often play significant roles in our dreams, so carrying out either a mindfulness meditation as mention above or any meditation focused on having a lucid dream during the time you are awake when using the WBTB technique (Wake Back To Bed technique: It constitutes three basic skills: (1) you need to be able recall dreams, (2) be able to discover dream signs from analysing your dream records, and (3) be able to recognize those dream signs in tonight's dreams. WBTB technique will most likely improve the chances of incubating entering trance through selfhypnosis and lucid dreaming on command. Nothing is ever possible through patience and perseverance. What you can feel certain about is that meditation is an excellent way of building up your skills of maintaining focus and concentration, and in awareness of your state of consciousness, which are both important foundations of any selfhypnosis leading into trance and lucid dream training.
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Sex tips to boost your life Whether your sex problem at any age is big or small, there are many things you can do to get your sex life back on track. Your sexual well-being goes hand in hand with your overall mental, physical, and emotional health. Communicating with your partner or partners even, maintaining a healthy lifestyle, availing yourself of some of the many excellent self-help materials on the market, and just having fun can help you weather tough times.
Enjoying a satisfying sex life along your own lusts The word sex can evoke a phantasmagoria of emotions. From love, excitement, and tenderness to longing, anxiety, and disappointment—the reactions are as varied as sexual experiences themselves. What is more, many people will encounter all these emotions and many others in the course of a sex life spanning several decades.
But what is sex, in fact? On one level, sex is just another hormone-driven bodily function designed to perpetuate the species. Of course, that narrow view underestimates the complexity of the human sexual response. In addition to the biochemical forces at work, your experiences and expectations help shape your sexuality. Your understanding of yourself as a sexual being, your thoughts about what constitutes a satisfying sexual connection, and your relationship with your partner or partners (group sex) are key factors in your ability to develop and maintain a fulfilling sex life. Many people, young or older, find it difficult to talk about sex even under the best of circumstances. When sexual problems occur, feelings of hurt, shame, guilt, and resentment can halt conversation altogether. Because good communication is a cornerstone of a healthy relationship, establishing a dialogue is the first step not only to a better sex life “à la carte”, but also to a closer emotional bond. Here are some tips for tackling this sensitive subject.
Find the right time to talk There are two types of sexual conversations: the ones you have in the bedroom and the ones you have elsewhere as in a night bar and dark rooms, or on cruising places. It's perfectly appropriate to tell your partners what feels good in the middle of lovemaking, but it's best to wait until you're in a more neutral setting to discuss larger issues, such as mismatched sexual desire or orgasm troubles. 48
Avoid criticizing that’s hopeless Couch suggestions in positive terms, such as, "I really love it when you touch my hair lightly that way," (or any other part of the body) rather than focusing on the negatives. Approach a sexual issue as a problem to be solved if any together rather than an exercise in assigning blame.
Confide in your partner about changes along your sexual needs If hot flashes are keeping you up at night or menopause has made your vagina dry, talk about these things to your partner. It's much better that he or she knows what's really going on rather than interpret these physical changes as lack of interest. Likewise, if you're a man and you no longer get an erection just from the thought of sex, show your partner how to stimulate you rather than let her believe she isn't attractive enough to arouse you anymore.
Be always honest You may think you're protecting your partner's feelings by faking an orgasm, but in reality you're starting down a slippery slope. As challenging as it is to talk about any sexual problem, the difficulty level skyrockets once the issue is buried under years of lies, hurt, and resentment.
Education among sex partners There are a large variety of good self-help materials available for every type of sexual issue. Browse the Internet or your local sex stores, pick out a few resources or sex equipment and toys that apply to you, and use them to help you and your partner getting to your climax. Do talk about these things for the correct programming among yourselves.
Own yourself time As to your or sex mates age, your sexual responses slow down. You and your partner and others can improve your chances of success by finding a quiet, comfortable, interruption-free setting for sex, a cellar or attic, cottage, garage, etc. Also, understand that the physical changes in your body mean that you'll need more time to get aroused and reach orgasm, so know well what your sexual aspirations are. When you think about it, spending more time having sex isn't a bad thing; working these physical necessities into your lovemaking routine can open up doors to a new kind of sexual experience. 49
Use lubrication Often, the vaginal dryness that begins in perimenopause can be easily corrected with lubricating liquids and gels. Use these freely to avoid painful sex—a problem that can snowball into flagging libido and growing relationship tensions. When lubricants no longer work, discuss other options with your doctor.
Maintain physical affection Even if you're tired, tense, or upset about the problem, engaging in kissing and cuddling is essential for maintaining an emotional and physical bond.
Practice touching The sensate focus techniques that sex therapists use can help you re-establish physical intimacy without feeling pressured. Many self-help books and educational videos offer variations on these exercises. You may also want to ask your partner to touch you in a manner that he or she would like to be touched. This will give you a better sense of how much pressure, from gentle to firm, you should use.
Try different positions Developing a repertoire of different sexual positions not only adds interest to lovemaking, but can also help overcome problems. For example, the increased stimulation to the G-spot that occurs when a man enters his partner from behind can help the woman reach orgasm.
What is the woman’s or man’s G-spot? When you discuss a woman’s G-spot, you’re likely on a mission to not only find the sucker, but to work your best at pushing her to the brink of an orgasm. Every woman is different on how they react to their G-spot being stimulated — some might find it incredibly intense to the point of where it’s not comfortable, while others encourage their partners to go there as often (and as thoroughly) as they can. A male’s G-spot is pretty similar, and Singer notes there is little scientific evidence to suggest that big of a difference between the two on either sex.
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Woman’s G-spot The G-spot, or Grafenberg spot, named after the gynaecologist who first identified it, is a mound of super-sensitive sponge like tissue located within the roof of the vagina, just inside the entrance. Proper stimulation of the G-spot can produce intense orgasms. Because of its difficult-to-reach location and the fact that it is most successfully stimulated manually, the G-spot is not routinely activated for most women during vaginal intercourse. While this has led some sceptics to doubt its existence, research has demonstrated that a different sort of tissue does exist in this location. You must be sexually aroused to be able to locate your G-spot. To find it, try rubbing your finger in a beckoning motion along the roof of your vagina while you're in a squatting or sitting position, or have your partner massage the upper surface of your vagina until you notice a particularly sensitive area. Some women tend to be more sensitive and can find the spot easily, but for others it's difficult. If you can't easily locate it, you shouldn't worry. During intercourse, many women feel that the G-spot can be most easily stimulated when the man enters from behind. For couples dealing with erection problems, play involving the Gspot can be a positive addition to lovemaking. Oral stimulation of the clitoris combined with manual stimulation of the G-spot can give a woman a highly intense orgasm.
Man’s G-spot Everyone has a G-spot, male and female alike. An easy way to think about it is to consider those goosebumps you get on your skin when you’re surprised, a cool air runs through or you get scared. While uncomfortable at first, the sensation itself is enjoyable if you sink into the unfamiliar territory. Those goosebumps come from a shift in your nerve endings, and when you target the G-spot of your body, you’re putting pressure on your most sensitive body part. Sex expert Coleen Singer explains that a German gynaecologist named Ernst Gräfenberg was the first to discuss this area, and thus, it’s named after him. This wasn’t until 1950 — so if you’re still getting on the bandwagon, you’re likely not alone. “It is commonly thought that a greater concentration of nerve endings are contained in both male and female G-spots which, when stimulated properly, can lead to intense orgasms in both genders,” Singer says.
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Where is the G-spot? There are many ways to ignite the pleasure of the male G-spot (more on that below!) but first, you need to know where it is. Singer explains that you might be surprised to discover this special place is actually located inside of the male prostate. “It’s a gland about the size of a walnut, and it’s located right under a man’s bladder,” she says. When you start to seek it out, proceed with caution and don’t go too hard, too fast. “The prostate is located behind the anal wall in the direction of your belly button (two to four inches from the sphincter). Be careful! The prostate is very sensitive. Do not poke and prod, instead caress and stroke. Press gently. Use feather-light touches,” Michael Alvear, founder of CallMeMaybe.us, says. “You’re looking for a walnut-sized fleshy ball hiding behind the anal wall. Finding it is a little like playing hide-and-seek, only you’re using your finger rather than your eyes.
How is the male G-spot different from the female one? When you discuss a woman’s G-spot, you’re likely on a mission to not only find the sucker, but to work your best at pushing her to the brink of an orgasm. Every woman is different on how they react to their G-spot being stimulated — some might find it incredibly intense to the point of where it’s not comfortable, while others encourage their partners to go there as often (and as thoroughly) as they can. A male’s G-spot is pretty similar, and Singer notes there is little scientific evidence to suggest that big of a difference between the two on either sex. “The female G-spot we already know, is a sensitive area of the anterior wall of the vagina believed to be highly erogenous and capable of ejaculation. Also referred to as The Skene's gland and Urethral sponge, the female G-spot, the female prostate as an accepted term. The male prostate is biologically homologous to the Skene's gland, it has been unofficially called the male G-spot because it can also be used as an erogenous zone,” Singer explains. “So, although very little scientific consensus exists on exactly what the female versus male G-spots actually are, they are similar in many regards, most importantly that stimulation of both can lead to explosive orgasms for both men and women.”
Why you should find the G-spot so amusing? Just like you appreciate when your partner takes the time to direct you around his or her body, your counterpart will enjoy the process of practicing something new on you that will make your orgasms and thus, your sex life, even hotter. 52
Plus: there’s something incredibly sexy and empowering about being unafraid to change the way you get to your personal finish line. Masturbating has long been thought as a way to not only relieve stress and tension as a solo act, but lead to a more fulfilling sexual intercourse experience because you can maintain endurance and better explain how to turn yourself on. The same goes for a Gspot: Why not add another layer of expertise to your already-overflowing sexual database? “Stimulating the male G-spot can be an intensely empowering experience, whether for a male doing it himself, or a woman giving him a ‘helping hand.’ Sometimes the greatest pleasures are the ones we deny ourselves, and the male G-spot is the forbidden fruit of a man’s erogenous zones,” Singer says. “If you haven’t explored that part of your own anatomy — maybe you’re used to being on top — it might be taboo and a bit freaky. And that’s what makes it so hot!
What your G-spot can help with In addition to benefiting your overall experience under the sheets, massaging and stimulating your G-spot can also help relieve other troubles you could be experiencing. As an example? If you struggle with rising to the, um, challenge and you haven’t been able to find anything that works to maintain your sail, try targeting your attention to that G-spot. “If you’re both in the mood but he has some performance problems, try massaging his prostate. You might find that the sexual arousal from the G-spot stimulation helps him to relax and get an erection.”
Gently stimulate the G-spot If you’re still a bit freaked out by exploring past your typical stroking-one-out, then start small. And by small, we mean by simply using your own fingers after your shower to find your area. “The easiest way to stimulate the male G-spot is to press gently on the skin between his balls and anus, known as the perineum (or, more commonly, the taint). You can do this by yourself when masturbating.” If you’d like your girlfriend to help you take that initial plunge into the G-spot unknown, have her add her hands while you’re having sex. Important, “Your partner can massage this area during sex or apply rhythmic pressure with her fingers to add to your pleasure. Giving this spot extra attention right before you climax will add some mind-blowing intensity to your orgasm.”
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What if it doesn’t feel any different? Just like you probably struggled with finding her G-spot, you might have trouble finding your own, even when you’re working as a team to stimulate it. Let me explain that it’s important that you’re already stimulated in some fashion — aka, turned on! — before you go on the G-spot hunting mission. Why? Just like your penis becomes erect, so does your prostate, and thus, your G-spot is easier to locate. “During arousal the prostate fills with semen fluid. The closer you get to orgasm the firmer the prostate becomes and the easier it is to find and stroke,” he says. “You can also try different positions. For example, some guys have better luck laying on their left side and putting their right hand behind their back while bending the knee of the top leg.”
Also use toys To no fault of your own — and as no sign that you can’t enjoy G-spot orgasms — some men might not be able to reach their own prostate, simply because their fingers aren’t long enough or your prostate is sitting higher. The prostate lies two to four inches into your rectum (towards your belly button). If your prostate is positioned higher than average and/or your fingers are shorter than average it can get a little tricky. Try a commercial prostate massager like Aneros or the Male P-Spot Massager, there are so many good toys. They’re even shaped to match the form of the anus.”
Adding G-spot to oral sex Once you feel comfortable with where your G-spot is located and how to get yourself going, ask your girlfriend or boyfriend to get in on the dirty work. One powerful way to ignite your passion and to have an explosive finish is to do double duty: a blow job and touching your G-spot will send you over the moon. Basically, it’s the same idea of you going down on her and fingering her at the same time, except this time, she’s doing it to you. “For even better access to the male G-spot, he or she can insert a finger into your anus. This is a bit more of an advanced technique than pressing on your taint, so it’s important to take precautions to ensure she doesn’t hurt you. These include trimming and filing her nails to avoid scratching you, and making sure your anus is clean (an enema is best) to avoid getting anything ‘unintended’ under her fingernails, which could later spread bacteria,” Singer notes. “And another thing? Be sure to use lots of lube!” 54
Write down your fantasies This exercise can help you explore possible activities you think might be a turnon for you or your partner. Try thinking of an experience or a movie that aroused you and then share your memory with your partner. This is especially helpful for people with low desire.
Do Kegel exercises Both men and women can improve their sexual fitness by exercising their pelvic floor muscles. To do these exercises, tighten the muscle you would use if you were trying to stop urine in midstream. Hold the contraction for two or three seconds, then release. Repeat 10 times. Try to do five sets a day. These exercises can be done anywhere—while driving, sitting at your desk, or standing in a checkout line. At home, women may use vaginal weights to add muscle resistance. Talk to your doctor or a sex therapist about where to get these and how to use them.
Try to relax Do something soothing together before having sex, such as playing a game or going out for a nice dinner. Or try relaxation techniques such as deep breathing exercises or yoga.
Use a vibrator or dildo’s This device can help a man or woman learn about her own sexual response and allow her to show her partner what she likes.
Don’t give up If none of your efforts seem to work, don’t give up hope. Your doctor can often determine the cause of your sexual problem and may be able to identify effective treatments. He or she can also put you in touch with a sex therapist who can help you explore issues that may be standing in the way of a fulfilling sex life.
Maintaining good health Your sexual well-being goes hand in hand with your overall mental, physical, and emotional health. Therefore, the same healthy habits you rely on to keep your body in shape can also shape up your sex life. 55
Don't smoke Smoking contributes to peripheral vascular disease, which affects blood flow to the penis, clitoris, and vaginal tissues. In addition, women who smoke tend to go through menopause two years earlier than their non-smoking counterparts. If you need help quitting, try nicotine gum or patches or ask your doctor about the drugs bupropion (Zyban) or varenicline (Chantix).
Use alcohol in moderation Some men with erectile dysfunction find that having one drink can help them relax, but heavy use of alcohol can make matters worse. Alcohol can inhibit sexual reflexes by dulling the central nervous system. Drinking large amounts over a long period can damage the liver, leading to an increase in estrogen production in men. In women, alcohol can trigger hot flashes and disrupt sleep, compounding problems already present in menopause.
Eat right Overindulgence in fatty foods leads to high blood cholesterol and obesity—both major risk factors for cardiovascular disease. In addition, being overweight can promote lethargy and a poor body image. Increased libido is often an added benefit of losing those extra pounds.
Use it or lose it When oestrogen drops at menopause, the vaginal walls lose some of their elasticity. You can slow this process or even reverse it through sexual activity. If intercourse isn't an option, masturbation is just as effective, although for women, this is most effective if you use a vibrator or dildo (an object resembling a penis) to help stretch the vagina. For men, long periods without an erection can deprive the penis of a portion of the oxygen-rich blood it needs to maintain good sexual functioning. As a result, something akin to scar tissue develops in muscle cells, which interferes with the ability of the penis to expand when blood flow is increased.
Putting the fun back into sex Even in the best relationship, sex can become ho-hum after a number of years. With a little bit of imagination, you can rekindle the spark.
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Be adventurous Maybe you've never had sex on the living room floor or in a secluded spot in the woods; now might be the time to try it. Or try exploring erotic books and films. Even just the feeling of naughtiness you get from renting an X-rated movie might make you feel frisky.
Be sensual Create an environment for lovemaking that appeals to all five of your senses. Concentrate on the feel of silk against your skin, the beat of a jazz tune, the perfumed scent of flowers around the room, the soft focus of candlelight, and the taste of ripe, juicy fruit. Use this heightened sensual awareness when making love to your partner.
Be playful Leave love notes in your partner's pocket for him or her to find later. Take a bubble bath together—the warm cozy feeling you have when you get out of the tub can be a great lead-in to sex. Tickle. Laugh.
Be creative Expand your sexual repertoire and vary your scripts. For example, if you're used to making love on Saturday night, choose Sunday morning instead. Experiment with new positions and activities. Try sex toys and sexy lingerie if you never have before.
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What is the best sex tip or tips for you, radiesthesia gives you the answer
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For result of your search read hereunder Feel super and have a wonderful time!
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Diagram Part One 1. Be confident There's a reason “fifty hades” is such a hit amongst us - being in control is sexy! Be confident in the bedroom or elsewhere and both you and your partner or partners will enjoy the benefits.
2. Enjoy each other's bodies Try some of our simple Kama Sutra positions for this one. Give each other compliments, pay special attention to a person's less favourite bits, make them feel desired and sexy. Body confidence is sexual gold!
3. Talk to your partner about your desires. One of the best sex tips we can recommend is to tell your partner what you're enjoying and why, even what could be done to make the sex better; faster slower etc. The sure-fire way to better sex time and time again!
4. Engage in foreplay It's easy to forget that foreplay is all part of your sex life. Make sure you have enough foreplay with your partner until you're both ready for intercourse. Prolong it by putting your clothes on, go out for a drink or a meal. Keep the evening going on as long as you can until you have to run home for the most intense sex ever!
5. Surprise your partner Put on some sexy lingerie one evening after work and wait for him. Don't let him touch you, dominate and lead him to the bedroom.
6. Drink coffee Research has indicated that a couple of cups of coffee could well boost the female libido. Even if that's not 100% guaranteed, the caffeine will improve your concentration - very important if you're getting hot and steamy in the bedroom.
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7. Turn off the TV You may love watching what Rita and Norris are up to in Corrie, but it's a bit of a passion killer. Hit the off button and pay attention to each other.
8. Do a strip-tease It doesn't have to look professional, as long as you move seductively in front of him and slowly take off your clothes. Don't allow him to touch either - this will turn him on even more.
9. Choose the right music Having the right tunes playing in the background can improve your bedroom experience. The right rhythm will make your lovemaking far more enjoyable. Try Marvin Gaye's Sexual Healing for starters.
10. Ice, ice baby If you're performing oral sex on your fella, try popping an ice cube in your mouth halfway through - the sensation as it goes from warm to cold will drive him wild.
11. Eat salmon Obviously, it's a great choice for dinner, but it's also known as a sexual powerhouse. The vitamins in salmon will help lift the libido, it contains moodenhancing Omega-3 oils and is protein rich, which is good for stamina.
12. Turn off the lights In fact, go one step further and blindfold each other. By getting rid of the sense of sight, you'll be forced to use your other senses.
13. Don't touch his private parts By not going for the one place he's desperate for you to touch, you'll drive him wild. Delay it as long as possible and when you do get there, make only the faintest touch at first.
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14. Text him with messages Build up the suspense throughout the day by sending him messages telling him what you want to do to him and what you want him to do to you
15. Make exciting noises Moaning will not only make you concentrate on what's going on, it'll make him feel excited and want to do more.
16. Wear high heels Very few men can resist a woman in heels and what's more, recent research suggests it can do wonders or your pelvic floor muscles. They can also give an added confidence boost in the bedroom. A guaranteed turn-on for your fella.
17. Suck his finger Do it in public. Just take his little finger in your mouth and swirl it around. It doesn't look like much to anyone who sees you do it, but believe us, it'll get him pretty turned on.
18. Talk dirty It doesn't have to be much, but try imagining the most dirty, erotic story you can think of it and then tell it. We know it may feel weird to start with, but only you and him will hear it, so just go for it. Make sure he can't touch you while you're telling it, as well.
19. Use food It's a foreplay trick we often see played out in films, but it's shouldn't be reserve for the big screen. Eating with your hands and using food you can smear on each other's bodies is fun and sexy.
20. Be naughty Why not try something different with your man? Whether it's a little light smacking, dressing up, or even going out wearing no knickers and then whispering it to him when you're in the middle of a big crowd.
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Diagram Part Two 21. Take a bath together Dim the lights, light the candles, use some nice scented bubble bath and hop in. It's another way to get close to each other and build up suspense. If your bath isn't big enough...
22. Share a shower Wash each other all over with a sponge without any intimate touching - it can be very erotic and will get you both in the mood.
23. Take photos of each other Either get hold of a cheap Polaroid, or you could send him a saucy snap taken on your mobile. Get him to return the compliment. It's a very effective form of foreplay.
24. Tie each other up We're not suggesting heavy bondage - just use some silk scarves or stockings instead. You can then tease whoever is pinned to the chair/bed and leave them panting for more. Just make sure the knots aren't too tight.
25. Get the feathers out Get a couple of feathers out and use them on each other's body during foreplay. The feeling of them on your skin will give each of you a sexy shiver.
26. Undress each other Taking each other's clothes off can be very sexy and, if you've planned it in advance, you can make sure you both have nice underwear on that looks and feels sensuous to the touch.
27. Massage each other Invest a little money in some oils and candles and then try massaging each other. Make sure you lie on your front and just let the hands and fingers do the walking. And, if neither of you are squeamish about it, foot massage can also be 63
very erotic. It means you can massage each other at the same time, should you so wish.
28. Small kisses Work your way all the way down the body using little butterfly kisses. Use your tongue sparingly and try not to snog. Instead lightly caress his skin with your lips. The longer you avoid his genitals, the more turned on he'll get.
29. Change the scenery Try making the living-room or another room the scene for some action. If it makes it easier and more comfortable, bring down the duvet and some cushions/pillows.
30. Pleasure yourself in front of each other This might take a bit of getting used to, but both of you will become enormously turned on, whether you're the watcher or the watched.
31. Try a new position We're all creatures of habit and like certain positions more than others, but trying a new sex position could make a big difference. Whether you go on top for a change, or do it standing up, you may find a new position that really does it for you both.
32. Get minty Suck an after-dinner mint and wait until there's almost nothing left. Then go down on your partner. The sensation will be unlike anything they've experienced before.
33. Watch yourselves Getting down to it in front of a mirror can be very erotic. If you don't have a mirror in your bedroom, try moving one from another room. Many women never really see their genitals and it can be a turn-on to see what's going on down there.
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34. Go 69 It's a tried and tested technique, but if you've never tried it before, then now's the time to give it a go. After all, what's better than both of you having oral sex at the same time.
35. Dress up Find out what each of you find sexy, whether it's uniforms, French maids or something else and then put on an outfit. Then you'll have to act it out a little. It's great fun and also a way to spice things up.
36. Use your whole body Sex isn't just about the bits below your belly button and above your knees. By exploring each other's bodies from top to toe, you may even find new erogenous zones that get each other going.
37. Use toys Introducing a vibrator into the bedroom can have a dramatic effect. Whether you use one on your fella, or let him use it on you, it doesn't matter, as long as you have fun.
38. Get slippery Using a lubricant is not only useful for making sure there's no nasty rubbing, but it can make the sensation of touching each other more sensual.
39. Try some aphrodisiacs Whether they work or not is still open to debate, but it adds something to the foreplay, if you're feeding each other asparagus or drinking champagne. Remember, sex is fun, not a chore.
40. Keep your eyes open It's easy to shut your eyes when you're in the full throes of passion, but by keeping your peepers open you are likely to intensify the whole experience for both of you.
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Diagram Part Three 41. Have a drink Too much alcohol can make the experience a bit of a flop, but just one glass of wine will relax both your body and mind and should help you feel a little more in the mood.
42. Have computer sex Sending naughty emails can be a lot of fun and instant messaging can be even better, because you're doing it in real time. Just make sure that neither of you are somewhere you might be overlooked!
43. Do some sexercise This is something you should do before reaching the bedroom. Exercise your pelvic floor muscles regularly and it will improve the blood flow to your genitals - this will make your orgasms more powerful and last longer.
44. Declutter your bedroom However much you're in the mood for getting down and dirty, tripping over your son's toy cars on the way in, or finding dolls under the duvet can easily put paid to the passion. Remember, your bedroom should be your own personal space that is free of junk and anyone else's clutter. Even a TV can ruin the experience.
45. Don't have sex just now OK, what we mean here is spend some time in bed without having intercourse. Simply touching each other and yourself is enough to give your sex life a boost and inject the spark you need.
46. Start kissing again Locking lips is the most fun you can have with your clothes on. Your lips are very sensitive and kissing your partner is one of the most personal things you can do. Why not spend a long time simply kissing each other? You'll be amazed the effects it will have...
47. Play a sexy game 66
Challenge him to a game of strip-Connect 4 or even strip-PlayStation. Making it competitive boosts your libido and will increase the anticipation. You each remove an item of clothing for each game you lose, until one of your is naked, or you can't wait any longer.
48. Film yourself Put that camcorder to a different use - either watch yourself back afterwards, or else hook it up to the TV, so you can watch yourselves while you get down to it. You'll be amazed how erotic it is.
49. Don't push it Although it's a great idea to schedule in some time to spend together if you have busy lives, sometimes the pressure to perform can dampen both your spirits, so just let it happen naturally. And if it doesn't go quite how you expect it to, better luck next time!
50. Set the scene Make sure you have the evening to yourself - send the kids to a friend's house if you are a couple, unplug the phone and turn off your mobile. Now dim the lights and light some candles. It'll help relax you both and get you into the mood.
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Meeting your Master on Webcam Foreword The slave makes a choice to live in voluntary servitude, and thereafter lives out a commitment to obedience. The Owner assumes ultimate responsibility for the well-being of another human being The Owner is the final decision maker in all things, except whatever s/he may have chosen to delegate to the slave as the slave’s sphere of responsibility.
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There is no part of the slave’s life or being that the Owner does not have the option to control, if s/he wishes to do so. How much is actually controlled is the Owner’s choice and decision, but there is an agreement that the Owner will in fact control and command the slave (to an extent determined by the Owner). This is as close to “slavery” as we can come today, given that statutory slavery is illegal in this country. Nor have I ever heard anyone seriously aspire to be in servitude against their will, so the involuntary slavery parallels of the past do not map to what we do consensually. Yet if one insists on finding an historical analogy for this (as some do), the closest that might have real bearing are the practices of ancient Rome where people could voluntarily enter slavery, and could re-acquire their freedom under certain circumstances if they so desired. I urge people with popular notions of slavery-as-echo-of-African-bondage to put that out of their mind. That was and is an ugly chapter in human history, and has no relationship to contemporary consensual slavery. If you who are reading this have issues around the word “slave”, you might try on “voluntary servitude” for size instead. It bypasses a lot of our historical baggage around the “s” word. A lot of people like to use the word “slave” because it has erotic juice, and that is where a lot of confusion comes in: as if there were different styles of “Master/slave” relationships. In my analysis, there are no different styles of M/s relationships if we are talking about the essential Owner/property agreement. It is demonstrable that there are many different styles of D/s relationships, some of which include use of the term “slave”, and varying degrees of control. But there is only one kind of literal Master/slave relationship: the very meaning of those words reflects that this relationship includes an Owner and his/her wholeyowned, whole-controlled human property. I also recognize that, as happens with language, the terms slave and M/s have been absorbed wholesale into the broader kink community and are often used with little or no understanding of or regard for the current or older meanings of those words. I think this happens from ignorance, not an intent to co-opt or redefine terms, but it certainly adds to the confusion when people think the term “slave” has any meaning they want it to have. From oral history I have heard in various parts of the leather community, the term “slave” used to be used far less frequently than it is today. A dominant woman who is now in her 70s, who has been active in kink since the early ‘60s, told me once, "It used to be that a slave was someone’s slave. They were property. People don’t often mean it that way anymore.” 69
So rather than thinking that the M/s community has taken its word “slave” out of common usage and made something arcane and weirdly qualified out of it, it appears that the word “slave” has been borrowed from the M/s segment and has since been absorbed into the broader SM community. It is now used loosely, inspired, I believe, by the archetype of what “owned slave” is assumed to represent. For people who are not whole-owned property but who are calling themselves slaves, be aware that you are using a term with a very specific meaning to the M/s subset of our community. The “slave” of a D/s relationship, be it ever so controlling, is not the same creature as the slave of an M/s relationship. They are fundamentally different.
Humiliation Humiliation is a favoured way to begin to create the idea of control in a Master and slave relationship, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have its own specific ways to work well – and to not work well for a relationship. By learning the techniques of humiliation as well as when to use it, you can use this as an effective slave training tool. The trick with humiliation is that many Masters will jump right into using this as a way to train their slaves – without any regard to whether or not this will work for their training purposes. In the initial discussions about slave training, the slave should have told the Master that this is something they enjoy or it’s something that can be used to help mould their behaviours as the training continues. When this is not discussed and simply just used at the Master’s whim, many problems can occur. If the slave has had any background of true abuse and humiliation (instead of this “play” usage), they can often become emotionally scarred by its use. When you simply start humiliating the slave and they don’t want this in your relationship, it can cause them to not trust you to keep them safe as well as to become intimidated by you. They might revert to the slave behaviours that you want, but you may also be crumbling them as a person outside of the relationship. Humiliation can take many forms in a slave training situation. It can be public displays of humiliation or it can be done in private. Public displays of humiliation can be as subtle as having to address the Master as ‘Master’ in public settings in front of friends or as dramatic as having the slave masturbate 70
in a public place. Private forms of humiliation can be as varied as puppy training or something that involves golden showers. But humiliation can also be done verbally by chastising the slave when they do something wrong, creating the sense in the slave that they have disappointed the Master in their actions. It can also include harsh words that can cause the slave to feel badly about themselves or certain parts of themselves. For example, by calling someone ‘slut’ or ‘whore,’ the slave can feel like they are lower than the Master, which can help them feel more controlled and willing to be obedient. Humiliation is often used as a form of punishment or during punishment to show the slave just how disappointed the Master might be in their actions. When used in conjunction with punishments like whippings and bondage, it can cause the submissive to not only feel physically controlled, but also emotionally controlled. This is a highly effective way to reshape the way that slave is acting or thinking about a certain situation. What you may not realize is that humiliation isn’t meant to hurt your slave, but rather to cause them to realize that they are your slave and someone that you wish to control in every way possible. When you are incorporating humiliation in your BDSM relationship, you do need to be careful to not hit any sore spots for the slave that might irrevocably damage them. This is something that should be discussed in the initial agreement as to what a scene or relationship will include. That said, humiliation is something that many slaves enjoy in a slave training situation because it adds to the overall control and power struggle between them and their Master. It allows them to feel more objectified as a slave and more of a ‘thing’ in the relationship.
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Skype to Your Master wherever in the World Find a Master along your needs, even if the webcam is at first the only possible solution. Remember, a slave has only one purpose, and that is to please a Master or simply others. There are a lot of variations to the original ‘Slave Role”. Your newly master should assign you with a number and a name, these two will be your identity as long as you remain a slave, but you can also register yourself at the “ Slave Registry” As a slave you will have the responsibility of following the rules of your Master. You will be assigned a Master and must follow your Master’s rules. Slaves need to meet the standard requirements to be accepted and once accepted there will be a “seven days trial” in which the slave can be let go at any stage. Sessions are carried out using a webcam such as SKYPE and contact is through Email. A requirement of becoming a slave is that you are to write a daily blog, the blog somewhere will be put on a website for others to see. Give preference to remain anonymous whilst you belong to a Master. If the 72
master wants to, he will assign you with a name of his choice. Remember once you are a Master’s slave, you are giving yourself over to him (or her). If you are interested in your new Master, mail him your “curriculum vitae”, in the form of an application.
Example: First name: Date of birth and age: Country: Email address: Occupation: Relationship status: (important) Who you live with: How many hours you can spend online: Sexuality: Why you want to be a slave: (full report) You “likes” or dislike limits: (full report) Your face picture. Your full naked body. Your full body in underwear. Bonus picture (optional)
The Rules are the rules of your Master 1. Slave will call his Master, Sir or Master in every sentence. 2. Slave gives up the right to his own body, meaning Master can tell the slave to do anything he wants. 3. Slave agrees to likes/dislikes/limits at the beginning of the contract, these cannot be changed later on. 4. Toilet use, shower use, masturbation, sex and sexual contact are for the Master to decide. 73
5. Slave is expected to shave all areas of their body below their eyebrows and are required to remain like that until end of contract. 6. Slave will not argue to Master about anything Master asks and will have all tasks and punishments done on time and to the best of their ability. 7. Slave will be open and honest about everything. 8. Slave will provide a list of clothing and underwear as well as pictures of the said items at the beginning of the contract. 9. Slave will write a 200 word diary everyday about everything and anything that is happening in their life. 10.Slave will be expected to move one limit to dislikes after the seven days trial period is up. 11.Slave has read and understands all the rules and will not question any of them. 12.Slave is expected to do one online session a week so a webcam is required. 13.Slave is to provide three pictures daily of which can be decided by the Master. 14.Slave is expected to have full use of a camera at all times. 15.Videos are required twice weekly of which the master will decide. A video camera is also needed for tasks and punishments. 16.Slave is expected to always make time for his lifestyle. 17.Slave should now realise that he is the property of his Master. 18.Slave should have a lot of time online. 19.Master can reward/punish the slave at any time for any reason without question.
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In memory of my first White Power and Skinhead Master Metal The gay skinhead scene has many sides, but one side seldom discussed is the skinhead Master/slave relationship. The boot boy is usually considered a sub or slave and many have lasting relationships with Dom or Master skinheads. Most have developed this relationship from a love/sexual relationship discovering the boot boy sub along the way and developing it over time. Some subs eagerly seek out Dom skinheads and start as weekend or temporary slaves, living separate lives until they both realise they need to be constantly together. The skinhead Master/slave relationship is no different to the many Master/slave relationships in the straight and gay communities, but becomes more specific to the skinhead culture and way of life. Both partners are skinheads from the start and already are part of the culture and finding each other through the usual gay encounters of pubs, parties and clubs. The Dominant partner will always exercise control of any sub or slave they find even if for a night or weekend, but when the relationship extends past that, a division of the relationship evolves and usually a relationship becomes evident. The piss boy, the boot boy or just the slave, all show their traits quickly and Masters see the potential for Domination. Time is what tells the two if the relationship will evolve to a more permanent lifestyle or not. This is usually not to whether the sub will obey but to 75
whether the Dom or Master wants this sub or slave for his own. Not all Masters like all subs/slaves. A slaves willingness is only as good as his willingness to submit to that particular Dom/Master. Chemistry will always play a part. Many Dom/Masters will say chemistry is not important for a slave to serve, but without it a slave cannot serve with vigour and vitality. The slave must want to serve and to serve that Master, to love his Master and want to give his Master every desire his Master wishes. A skinhead Master needs to know his slave will make sure his Master will always look good, to his clothing presentation to his Boots sparkling and his slave's love showing in every look and move the slave makes. The slave also has to look immaculate, his boots also sparkling so that his Masters friends and squad know he is proud of his Master and wants his Master to be held in the highest esteem of his friends and acquaintances. Yes, a skinhead has pride both in his self and his roots as a working man, but that does not mean he should neglect himself. His slave/sub will ensure he looks like a king wherever he goes. Long live boot boys and their Masters.
Hypnotising yourself using Affirmations and Self-Talk Another Method Learning how to hypnotize yourself is one of the simplest, rewarding yet challenging skillsets any person can develop. I mean, who wouldn’t benefit from the ability to alter every little facet of their reality, to play yourself God, the Supreme and be master of their universe. If there was one superpower everyone would be wise to develop (and at as early age as possible), it’s the ability to tinker and experiment with the subconscious programming of their mind! How effective would you be if you could unleash all your potential, whenever its needed! And instantly, effortlessly overcome every challenge that blocks your journey towards self-mastery. That inner yearning to be the best YOU possible is what drives desire in every human. Whether you want to get in better shape, be more attractive to sex mates, or just have more power and influence in your life.
Self-hypnosis allows us to create all this and more. But learning how to hypnotize yourself can be a challenge, and that’s mainly down to one specific and problematic reason…that reason being…
…There is a huge misconception about what hypnosis really is! Truth is, you’ve been sold a lie, a life-long scandal that’s been draining your potential. Known by every great stage hypnotist, every pioneer of new 76
industries yet hidden from those who struggle to tap into their greatness…So what is this great scandal of industrial and stage hypnosis? First, let’s look at a typical stage hypnosis show as illustration. Stage hypnosis is all about showmanship, and much like seasoned magicians, the major tricks of the trade are distraction and obfuscation. Otherwise known as sleight of hand. The magician has you focus on his left hand while his right hand (hidden from view) manipulates the illusion, setting up trick after trick that induces the mind of the audience to awe and bewilderment, from the perspective of the audience it truly looks like magic. This is also what faith healers do in the name of Jesus or any other deity, it is stage hypnotism to make religion a reality. But once you’ve been let in on the secret, once you see the illusion from a different perspective, the perspective that reveals how the illusion is performed. The magic quickly fades and you may even say to yourself “It’s so simple, why didn’t I notice that earlier” Hypnosis is no different, it has its illusion of magic and its more logical, simple explanation. What side of the act would you rather be in on? Well keep on reading because I’m about to let you in on the hypnotists dirty little secret of the stage hypnotist, secrets you can quickly use to harness greater wealth, happiness or power right this very instance, without having to enter a catatonic trance to do it, and without having to buy any expensive programs teaching you ‘the secrets of hypnosis’. Because once you strip away all the showmanship of stage hypnosis, strip away all the fancy patter and linguistic flair, hypnosis boils down to one very simple principle. You tell people what to do…and they do it. The sleight of hand in hypnosis comes from letting the audience believe there has to be a special trance state before subjects act out your suggestions. But the power of hypnosis doesn’t come from the trance…It comes from the IDEAS! Ideas themselves are what contain the potential for transformation, trance is just the by-product of having someone focus intently on the ideas we present them (you think the media and politicians don’t know this secret? How many ideas are you being presented with in the media every single day?). James Braid the physician who coined the phenomena ‘hypnosis’ back in the 1840s, realised later in his career he had given hypnosis the wrong name. Initially he believed it to be a form of sleep but later discovered he could elicit all the same hypnotic phenomena without inducing trance in any of his subjects, he found that merely having someone concentrate on an idea was enough to get the desired physical response. He attempted to rename hypnosis with its more 77
accurate definition of ‘monoideism’ (meaning the prolonged absorption in a single idea) but by then, his earlier term of hypnosis had already become famous and news of its power had spread across the western world. You see the secret of stage hypnosis is not about the mystical trance state, it’s about people suspending their personal thinking and allowing the stage hypnotist to think for them, they’re focusing on the hypnotists ideas to the extent they begin acting those ideas out. The showmanship of hypnosis is all about keeping a person’s logical mind in a suspended state of confusion or anticipation, the longer its kept distracted from thinking for itself, the more you can direct that person to act out your ideas. So if you want to learn how to hypnotise yourself, forget the ‘trance state’ for the moment, learning meditation is much more effective for that. Focus instead on the quality of your thinking. Meditation practice, self-hypnosis, leading in the trance state, and lucid dreaming is all but one package. Science has discovered how people think anywhere between 40,000 to 70,000 thoughts every single day. That’s a lot of noise, lots of internal chatter dominating a person’s mind. They’ve also discovered how out of all of those thoughts, a full 75% of them tend to be negative, critical, undermining, or selfdeprecating The majority of people spend 75% of their waking life telling themselves why they aren’t good enough, why they can’t achieve success, why they aren’t worthy of their dreams. Now if it only takes a handful of suggestions from the stage hypnotist to directly influence a person’s subconscious behaviours, imagine the impact 70,000 suggestions will have on your subconscious mind. Is it any wonder most people are stressed or depressed, their subconscious mind is in constant overload, being pulled in a thousand directions, never knowing which path to truly follow. The result from this overload is…burnout, sloth and lethargy The body can’t cope with so many conflictingly negative instructions. As indicated by the fact stress related diseases and depression continues to rise year on year to all-time record highs. And the sad fact is most people are so distracted by the world around them, they’re completely unaware as to the quality of their thoughts, they have no awareness of the limitations they’re imposing on themselves by allowing self-destructive thoughts to take seed in their mind, instead of blossoming positive thought patterns, they nurture the weeds that drain their vitality. Even one simple suggestion contains the seed of hypnotic potential. The ideas and thoughts that get repeated most are what set your boundaries and limitations, remove the self-critical thoughts from your awareness and all of a sudden you’ll be unshackled to move freely towards your dreams. 78
Learning how to hypnotize yourself then has nothing to do with the unconscious mind only, it’s really the exact opposite, it’s about heightened consciousness, and bringing those 70,000 thoughts into full conscious awareness, shining the light of discernment on every idea and making decisions based on wisdom instead of ignorance. It’s about monitoring your thoughts on a moment to moment basis, eliminating all the negative thought patterns while reprogramming your internal dialogue with more affirmative and self-respecting statements of value. It’s no good writing a hypnosis script for yourself, recording it to mp3, and listening back when comfortable in a deep trance state. You may tell yourself a thousand positive ideas for change inside trance, but if (once you’ve roused from trance) the other 69,000 thoughts you might have that day undermine the good work you’ve just done, no amount of trance based self-hypnosis will ever get you where you want to go, until you learn how to talk to yourself more positively. Hypnosis is simple because everyone is already engaging in it, everyone is either absorbed in their ideas of success or absorbed in their ideas of failure. The hypnosis generating idea machine never gets switched off. Hypnosis is challenging because becoming a good self-hypnotist means directing consciousness to see the world from more empowering perspectives, hypnosis is the combination of consciousness infused with artistic thinking, we paint beautiful, empowering pictures inside our minds, and it takes consistent cultivation of those positive images to gather enough internal energy to inspire our actions. Hypnosis is the discipline of moment to moment self-respect and only accepting the very best for yourself. We’re not just planting a few positive seeds to have one pretty garden in the recess of our minds, we’re creating an entire self-sustaining ecosystem in Amazonian rainforest proportions. Self-hypnosis is rewarding because once you’ve learnt how to hypnotize yourself, you’ll have complete mastery of every single idea you allow into your mind, no longer will you be swayed by negative influences, you’ll be strong willed and completely aware of everything in your internal and external environment. A true moment to moment mastery of life. Complete control of your emotions and energy levels. Creativity, inspiration and insight on tap. So how do you start hypnotising yourself with this particular method: 1. Firstly, you’ll need a pen and paper, spend 24 hours just writing down every single thought or idea that pops into your head (without judging and without attempting to change them just yet). This will help you become more conscious of how you’re currently thinking. 79
2. Secondly, once you’ve become aware of your thoughts, learn to stop yourself thinking the negative ones. Do this by affirming three positive thoughts for every negative thought that enters your mind. Over time this will sway the balance so you’re now 75% positive instead of 75% negative. This will have a huge effect on your energy levels and vitality. 3. Finally, just keep going, keep finding better affirmations, offer yourself more and more positive words of encouragement. Begin infusing the positive statements with energy and emotion, get yourself energised about who you want to become. Imagine it clearly as you do so…the most important phase, just being patient while developing better thought habits. Through better thought habits you’ll develop better speaking habits, better communication means better quality friends, and its through the help of our friends and acquaintances that we really get what we want from life. People coming together under the banner of a charismatic leader or a just cause. Learn to inspire yourself and you’ll quickly start inspiring others. Keep this up and before you know it your entire life will begin to change as you’re hypnotising yourself to believe in your own greatness, just as you’ve previously hypnotised yourself into believing your own limitations. People will sense the change in your energy, you’ll carry yourself better, you’ll have more confidence doors of opportunity begin to open and you’ll find yourself being motivated to walk through them. And if this sounds too simple to be effective, just remember that having complete control of your personal thinking is such a rare skill that you’ll be separated from 99.999% of the population on this planet and as the saying goes ‘the cream always naturally rises to the top’. Everyone who ever becomes successful in any field got their because they believed in themselves, they talked themselves into lofty positions and they supported themselves with positive affirmative statements every step of the way, embrace your self-worth and find yourself joining amongst societies elite.
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Deep Trance and Brain States Do we even need hypnosis to attain trance in the first place? What is trance? Even though the concept of trance has been around since our most primitive hunter gatherer ancestors walked the earth. In the past it was always considered a mystical and religious state, a kind of divine connection to a higher purpose that could invoke the power of Gods and Demons. From magical and compelling internal visions, to experiences of blissful relaxation, accelerated learning and sensations of deeper connectedness, or even just feeling as though you’re totally in the zone, on fire and unstoppable. There are millions upon millions of subjective reports of the various abilities people experience when they’re in a very deep trance state. Yet It’s only in the last fifty years that scientists developed the technology to explain, in objective terms, just what’s going on as people experience these internal life changing moments of altered consciousness. With the advent of neurofeedback devices that measure subtle magnetic/electric fluctuations created by the brain and picked up through connecting electrodes to the scalp, we’re now able to detect what happens to our brainwaves as we move in and out of these altered states of consciousness. Maxwell Cade was one the pioneers in this field, being a Hypnotherapist, having studied Zen meditation since his early twenties and having worked as a 81
government physicist who helped revolutionise radar technology, Maxwell Cade was perfectly positioned to combine his passion for meditation and the mind with his technical skills as a scientist. In the early 1970s, working closely with one of his students, an electronics engineer by the name of Geoffrey Blundell. Together they designed a multichannel electroencephalograph (EEG) device that could look at the relationship of the beta, alpha, theta and delta rhythms of each brain hemisphere and display these simultaneously on a graph on an external monitor. Hooked up to this device people could see instantly how their thinking directly affected the quality of their brainwave patterns and the quality of their physiology. The invention of the Mind Mirror, as they called it, enabled Cade to make startling discoveries about the brain, meditation and consciousness, the subject of his seminal book, The Awakened Mind: Biofeedback and the Development of Higher States of Awareness, published in 1979. In which he discusses his stories, research results and gives many of the most effective meditation techniques recorded by the mind mirror. One of his main points of interest was studying the brainwave patterns of the most highly accomplished Zen monks, Swamis and Lamas he could make contact with. After studying dozens of such individuals, a highly coherent brainwave pattern began to show a universal state of enlightenment shared by every master.
Where does the saying come from that we only use 10% of our brains? When normal (non-meditating) individuals were hooked up to the mind mirror, the graph displayed only the beta brainwave patterns contained to a very isolated area in the left frontal hemisphere of the neo-cortex, (top left beta pattern only on the graph above). This being the home of the monkey mind, the part of consciousness we mistake for our complete individual identity. It’s the incessant talking, the logical rationalising, the voice in our heads. Yet while this brainwave pattern was active, all theta, alpha and delta signals fell flat, leaving a very uneven and lopsided looking graph. Only 10% of the brain appears to be active. Whereas regardless of what denomination or spiritual tradition the enlightened Zen, Swami or Lama master came from, they all shared the same brainwave patterns, the pattern of the awakened mind (full image above). Where left and right hemispheres are completely synced with balanced beta, strong alpha, balanced theta and balanced delta. The full mind is activated to some degree compared to only the 10% of most meditation beginners. 82
What Cade found remarkable of the awakened mind state, is how the masters managed to maintain this level of coherence even as they were up and walking around, reading a book, teaching a class. It’s as though they had aligned their consciousness to a higher level of coherence than the rest of us, enabling a much more grounded, relaxed, meaningful and joyous approach to life. After measuring the brainwave patterns of highly successful people, from CEO’s of companies to certain TV show and radio presenters, they discovered that this brainwave pattern didn’t just mark the mind of an enlightened master, it also correlates with people who have mastered their life and used their selfmastery to create massive amounts of success for themselves. And the best part is, he found that this brainwave state could easily be trained into his students in a matter of weeks or months, using special guided imagery exercises and suggestions of deep and blissful relaxation.
So what exactly are these brainwave patterns and what are their correlations to various trance like phenomena? It’s important to understand how your brain contributes to the state of your mind. While most of us focus on looking at our emotions in an attempt to become happier, more spiritual beings, our brains waves and our subconscious mind also play a key part in our quest for fulfillment. It’s important to understand how your brain contributes to the state of your mind. While most of us focus on looking at our emotions in an attempt to become happier, more spiritual beings, our brains waves and our subconscious mind also play a key part in our quest for fulfillment. In this article, we’ll be looking at our five brain wave frequencies and how they affect our state of mind, and will be following up on Thursday with a more indepth look at the impact they have on us physically and mentally, in addition to some exercises we can do to “switch on” certain frequencies.
Are We the Controllers of our Reality? We easily forget that we are the controllers of our reality – and that “our reality” is not made up of outside influences, but that it actually consists of our thoughts, beliefs and mindset. Therefore, by learning about the deeper states of consciousness, you can open your subconscious mind and create your reality at will, and with precision. To do this, the first step is understanding your different brain frequencies. Did you know that we all have five (Beta, Alpha, Theta, Delta and Gamma), and each frequency is measured in cycles per second (Hz) and has its own set of 83
characteristics representing a specific level of brain activity and a unique state of consciousness? Smart, eh?
1. Beta (14-40Hz) – The Waking Consciousness And Reasoning Wave Beta brain waves are associated with normal waking consciousness and a heightened state of alertness, logic and critical reasoning. While Beta brain waves are important for effective functioning throughout the day, they also can translate into stress, anxiety and restlessness. The voice of Beta can be described as being that nagging little inner critic that gets louder the higher you go into range. Therefore, with a majority of adults operate at Beta; it’s little surprise that stress is today’s most common health problem. Beta – these brainwave patterns represent normal conscious thinking, the monkey mind that ruminates, plans, details, analyses and judges. It’s the part that criticises and condemns. It’s active when we’re highly focused on the external world around us, which in itself can be a type of trance state. An example would be people who cling to ideas and external form, even when real world evidence is glaringly obviously telling them something is wrong, think the image of a near death starving anorexic who clings to the idea of being too fat 84
regardless of how many people plea for them to eat more food. Beta brainwave patterns alone are also associated with high levels of anxiety and stress keeping people emotionally attached to these harmful ways of thinking.
2. Alpha (7.5-14Hz) – The Deep Relaxation Wave Alpha brain waves are present in deep relaxation and usually when the eyes are closed, when you’re slipping into a lovely daydream or during light meditation. It is an optimal time to program the mind for success and it also heightens your imagination, visualization, memory, learning and concentration. It is the gateway to your subconscious mind and lies at the base of your conscious awareness. The voice of Alpha is your intuition, which becomes clearer and more profound the closer you get to 7.5Hz. Alpha – if beta brainwaves are when we’re highly focused, alpha brainwaves begin to show up as we relax our attention, when we pay attention to what’s going on in the periphery of our vision while still maintaining an alert gaze. As we enter the periphery of our experience, we begin to turn our attention inward, paying attention to those subtle sensations of the physical body and how we feel in relation to our environment. The stronger the alpha waves the more blissful, relaxed and peaceful we feel internally. Like the Zen monk who clears his mind and sits for hours blissfully observing the subtle sensations of his inner form. One of the key aspects of this type of trance is that it soothes the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight) in a way that deepens relaxation beyond what happens during normal sleep. If people fall asleep still feeling threatened or stressed from their days work, the sympathetic nervous system stays active and alert (paying attention to possible threats in the environment). In the past it kept us from being eaten by predators in our sleep, but in modern times it just prevents people from recharging their batteries and getting a soothing night’s sleep. People tend to wake up feeling as stressed and anxious as before they went to bed. Developing alpha brainwaves in meditation is like sending a message to the sympathetic nervous system, telling it all is well, and allowing it feel free, unwind and relax. Martial artists who remain calm in even the most stressful situations produce lots of alpha waves, the ability to maintain conscious contact with the sensations and intelligence of the physical body.
3. Theta (4-7.5Hz) – The Light Meditation And Sleeping Wave Theta brain waves are present during deep meditation and light sleep, including the all-important REM dream state. It is the realm of your subconsciousness and only experienced momentarily as you drift off to sleep from Alpha and wake from deep sleep (from Delta). It is said that a sense of deep spiritual connection 85
and unity with the universe can be experienced at Theta. Your mind’s most deep-seated programs are at Theta and it is where you experience vivid visualizations, great inspiration, profound creativity and exceptional insight. Unlike your other brain waves, the elusive voice of Theta is a silent voice. It is at the Alpha-Theta border, from 7Hz to 8Hz, where the optimal range for visualization, mind programming and using the creative power of your mind begins. It’s the mental state which you consciously create your reality. At this frequency, you are conscious of your surroundings however your body is in deep relaxation. Theta – theta brainwaves are the inner movie maker, when people report intense visions and flashes of light they’re accompanied with spikes in theta brainwave activity, they’re the visual dreams as we arouse ourselves out of R.E.M sleep. People often become entranced in their own fantasies, they’ll daydream about future plans or review past experiences, they get so wrapped up in their own ideal lifestyles or past hurts that they neglect what’s happening in the present moment, often ignoring the day to day habits and actions that would lead them to a healthier way of living. Trance at this level can be highly magical going on vivid adventures with spirit guides while having your bum planted firmly on the chair, in practical terms it’s the ability to plan visually different strategies and possible outcomes.
4. Delta (0.5-4Hz) – The Deep Sleep Wave The Delta frequency is the slowest of the frequencies and is experienced in deep, dreamless sleep and in very deep, transcendental meditation where awareness is fully detached. Delta is the realm of your unconscious mind, and the gateway to the universal mind and the collective unconscious, where information received is otherwise unavailable at the conscious level. Among many things, deep sleep is important for the healing process – as it’s linked with deep healing and regeneration. Hence, not having enough deep sleep is detrimental to your health in more ways than one. Delta – Characterised by the absence of consciousness, a highly relaxed trance state that signals for the body to begin repairing and rejuvenating as our mind enjoys sleep. Advanced meditators who gain access to this brainwave state while conscious are able to have a very direct influence over their physiology, including the control of heart rate or even controlling blood flow, some people can consciously choose how many drops of blood they allow from their finger if pricked by a needle.
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The more recently found Gamma Brainwave is different to the other brainwaves in that it exists in a very low amplitude and is always present, it acts as a carrier wave enabling the other brainwaves to flow from one part of the brain to another. If gamma waves are shut off it can produce schizophrenia type trance states where the brain is unable to connect relevant information from one part of the brain to the next. Schizophrenics are unable to connect dots appropriately enough to develop a coherent meaning of their environment, to distinguish the internal senses to the external stimuli.
5. Gamma (above 40Hz) – The Insight Wave This range is the most recently discovered and is the fastest frequency at above 40Hz. While little is known about this state of mind, initial research shows Gamma waves are associated with bursts of insight and high-level information processing.
Brain states in Meditation Did you know that we all have five (Beta, Alpha, Theta, Delta and Gamma) states of brain wave activity and each frequency is measured in cycles per second (Hz) and has its own set of characteristics representing a specific level of brain activity and a unique state of consciousness? Understanding this (knowing 87
yourself) will greatly enhance your ability to heighten perception, create peace and bliss and expand conscious awareness in a much more qualitative way. The purpose of meditation is to bring our mind, emotions and actions to such an alignment (stillness and unity) that we allow the brain waves gradually reduced in frequency until they reach a particular level where a strange and little known event occurs – they spike! Not much is understood about why this happens but at a particular range of reduction in brain wave activity the wave suddenly rises up higher than it was in the waking consciousness. In mysticism this is the state called illumination and this is the state we’re trying to achieve during our meditations simply because this state brings in much stronger (or intense) form of energy. In Kabbalah it’s called CORRECTION of desire, in Alchemy it’s called TRANSFORMATION of metals, in Yoga it’s called Samadhi, etc. Eventually, through ‘training’ of the reduction of thought we can hold these states during our waking conscious experience. So the idea is to bring ourselves into these states (called meditating or cultivating) more and more until this heightened LIGHT (energy) enhances our WILL or strength of conscious awareness so that it translates into our normal waking (and sleeping) life. That’s really the whole of meditation. Now how we go about this varies in great degrees depending on the mystical traditions or systems of esoteric application. But make no mistake, in the end all paths require this enlightened degree through this process, there is no other way of achieving it – it all happens through alignment and stillness of mind, emotion and body while increasing conscious awareness. This cannot happen by any other means except by achieving this inner state of illumination which is the power source that strengthens the conscious awareness leading to an enlightened state (peace, bliss, focus, balance, etc.)
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From the author and editor of this EBook:
Webcam show for friends a few years ago Faith and doubt! These are like the North and the South Pole. Unfortunately, a man of faith is quite often misunderstood. We are apt to call a man of faith as something “a fanatic”. Here we make a deplorable mistake. A fanatic hates reason and ignore the reasoning mind, whereas a man of faith, if he is really a man of faith, will welcome reason and accept the doubting mind. Then his faith will help the doubting mind to transcend itself into the infinite "Vast", into something eternal and immortal as long as it is remembered according to the teachings of the Psychologist Carl Gustaf Jung, the "Archetypes" in the "Collective Conscious." Let us be wise, and constantly keep our inner fears and doubts under perfect control. It is also my own conviction that those who try to associate meditation, selfhypnotism, trance, affirmative self-talk, radiesthesia, psychosynthesis (psychology) with religion and occultism are doing a great deal of harm to it. I formally decline any solidarity with them, any responsibility for their theories and explanations and terms they use. Of course, one cannot stop anyone calling himself, for instance, a radiesthetist but it would be most unfair if the misconceptions of some misguided enthusiasts should bring discredit to radiesthesia. Stephen Hawkins said: “"I regard the brain as a computer which will stop working when its components fail. There is no heaven or afterlife for broken down computers; that is a fairy story for people afraid of the dark," he added.
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Contents A good hypnotherapist should teach self-hypnosis. Foreword The subconscious mind (and hypnosis) What is Self-hypnosis A self-hypnosis technique Difficulties learning self-hypnosis Imagery in hypnosis Rehearsing positive outcomes, and how it is done A self-hypnosis script to help you relax and reduce anxiety Main points. Hypnosis is a serious therapeutic tool… and techniques The power of trance in self-hypnotism How being in a trance can help Self-inducing a hypnotic trance Deepening the hypnotic trance Coming out of the trance Using hypnotic spirals – Part One Bright objects; progressive relaxation Putting yourself into a trance Breathing exercises and relaxation; an exercise in breathing Imagery in self-hypnosis Self-hypnosis spirals (Part Two) Working with erotic hypnotic spirals Self-hypnosis and healing trance state Trance To remember (important); someone argued … Erotic self-hypnosis Sex and meditation are the same to the brain The energy of whatever sex Has sex fizzled? Check into the emotional connection Seven secrets to a healthy sex life for both men and women Good advice improving sex life Does meditation help in the development of self-hypnosis, trance and lucid dreaming? Sex tips to boost your life (stimulation of the G-spot) What is the best sex tip or tips for you, radiesthesia gives you the answer. The charts will inform you. Response from 1 to 50 (on the three diagrams) Meeting your Master on Webcam Skype to your Master wherever in the world In memory of my first White Power and Skinhead Master Metal 90
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Hypnotising yourself using affirmations and self-talk Deep trance and brain states Brain states in meditation From the author and editor of this EBook Contents
© January 2017 – Satsang EBook Publications, Ghent, Belgium (Non-commercial – Free download) Owner: Philippe L. De Coster, B.Th., DD
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