Sarah Kane Crave

SARAH KANE

CRAVE

My thanks to Vicky Feartherstone, Alan Westaway, Catherine Cusack, Andrew Maud, Kathryn Howdon, Mel Kenyon, Nils Tabert, Domino !ede"ma, #elena $e%&c, 'lena (reen)ield and New Dramatists*

My thanks to Vicky Feartherstone, Alan Westaway, Catherine Cusack, Andrew Maud, Kathryn Howdon, Mel Kenyon, Nils Tabert, Domino !ede"ma, #elena $e%&c, 'lena (reen)ield and New Dramatists*

For Mark.

Crave was +remiered by $aines $louh at the Traerse Theatre, 'dinburh on -. Auust -//0* The cast was as )ollows1

C

2haron Duncan34rewster 

M 5nrid B $aul

Craiie

Thomas Hickey

A Alan Williams

 Vicky Featherstone  Director  Vicky  (eoria 2ion  Designer  (eoria  Lighting by Niel #* 'dwards

Characters

C M B A

Author's note

$unctuation is used to indicate deliery, not to con)orm the rules o) rammar* A stroke 678 marks the +oint o) interru+tion in oerla++in dialoue*

Editor's note

This edition o) Crave, )irst re+rinted in 9:::, incor+orates minor reisions made to the oriinal te;t by 2arah Kane shortly be)ore her death* 5t should there)ore be rearded as the de)initie ersion in all res+ects* C



B

To die*

C

2omewhere outside the city, 5 told my mother, 5 say 5 drank a bottle o) +ort, smoked some )as and )ucked a straner*

M

B

All lies* He needs to hae a secret but he can=t hel+ tellin* He thinks we don=t know* 4eliee me, we know* C

M C M

A oice in the desert He who comes a)ter* There is somethin in the way*

A

2till here*

C

Three summers ao 5 was bereaed* No one died but 5 lost my mother*

A

2he had him back* 5 beliee in anniersaries* That a mood can be re+eated een i) the eent that caused it is triial or )orotten* 5n this case it=s neither* C

M

5 will row older and 5 will, it will, somethin

B

5 smoke till 5=m sick*

A

4lack on white and blue* When 5 wake 5 think my +eriod must hae started or rather neer sto++ed  because it only )inished three days ao* C

M

The heat is oin out o) me*

C

The heart is oin out o) me*

B

5 )eel nothin, nothin*

5 )eel nothin* M

5s it +ossible>

B

2orry>

A

5=m not a ra+ist*

M

Daid>  A beat 

B



 A beat  B



B



M

This has nothin to do with you* Why what>

C M

5=m not interested in you* Why what, why what>

C M

5=m not interested in the )irst )uckin thin about you* 5 don=t drink* 5 hate smokin* 5=m eetarian* 5 don=t )uck around* 5=e neer isited a +rostitute and 5=e neer had a se;ually transmitted disease other than thrush* This does, 5=m a)raid, make me a rarity, i) not uniue* A

B

!ook*

C

!isten*

B

!ook* My nose*

M

What about it*

B

What do you think>

C

4roken*

B

5=e neer broken a bone in my body*

A

!ike Christ*

4ut my Dad has* 2mashed his nose in a car crash when he was eihteen* And 5=e ot this* (enetically im+ossible, but there it is* We +ass these messaes )aster than we think and in ways we don=t think +ossible* B

5) 5 was

C

5) 5 5) 5 was M

H< $ $!'A2' 5T=2 T5M'

B

And you don=t think that a child conceied by ra+e would su))er>

C

4ut as it is*

M



C

5s this it> M

How much loner 

B

How many more times

A

How much more

C

Corru+t or ine+t*

B

5 am nobody=s wind)all*

A

5=m sorry*

C

(o away*

M Now* C

(o away*

B

5=m sorry*

C

(o away*

A

5=m sorry, 5=m sorry, 5=m sorry, 5=m sorry, 5=m sorry, 5=m sorry, 5=m sorry*

C

What )or>

M

Hae you eer ra+ed anyone> 5=m sorry 5=m )ollowin you*

A

B No* M

Why not> There=re worse thins than bein )at and )i)ty*

A M

Why not> 4ein dead and thirty*

A M

5=m the kind o) woman about whom +eo+le say Who was that woman> The uestion is Where do you lie and where do you want to lie>

A M

Absence slee+s between the buildins at niht*

C

Don=t die*

B

This city, )uckin loe it, wouldn=t lie nowhere else, couldn=t*

M

Where do you )ind it>

C

Where do 5 start>

A

A #a+anese man in loe with his irtual reality irl)riend*

B



A

2words in turmoil*

B

Here*

5=m lookin )or a time and +lace )ree o) thins that crawl, )ly or stin*

C M

5nside* Here*

A M

4e the one*

C

5) she=d le)t ?

M

5 don=t want to row old and cold and be too +oor to dye my hair* 5=e ot important  thins to do*

C

5t=s ettin worse*

A

5 am lost, so )uckin lost in the mess o) a woman*

B

2he wants a kid yesterday*

A

What will 5 do when you throw me away>

C

!isten*

B

!ook*

!isten* 5 am here to remember* 5 need to*** remember* 5 hae this rie) and 5 don=t know why* C

A



A

And then at the +aisley reen cushion, a thorouhly ina++ro+riate cushion to re+resent any +art o) me, es+ecially the +arts 5 am showin to her* C

M

Do you hae di))iculty in relationshi+s with men>

A busy M

ha++y busy ha++y busy ha++y

Do you have relationshi+s with men> The only thin 5 want to say 5=e said already, and it=s a bit buckin tedious to say it aain, no matter how true it is, no matter that it=s the only uni)yin thouht humanity has* B

H@W CAN

A

My rie) has nothin to do with men* 5=m hain a breakdown because 5=m oin to die* C

A

!on be)ore 5 had the chance to adore all o) you, 5 adored the bits o) you 5 could see*

B

The woman with draon eyes*

A

4lue into reen*

C

All blue*

A

5 don=t hae music, Christ 5 wish 5 had music but all 5 hae is words*

B

Du bist die !iebe meines !ebens*.

A

Don=t cut me out*

B

2omethin inside me that kicks like a bastard*

C

A dull ache in my solar +le;us*

B

(a )or a )a*

M

Hae you eer been hos+italised>

A

$ain by association*

C

5 need a miracle to sae me*

M

What )or>

A

5nsanity*

C

Anore;ia* 4ulimia*

B

Whateer*

C No* M Neer* C

2orry*

A

The truth is sim+le*

C

5=m eil, 5=m damaed, and no one can sae me*

A

Death is an o+tion*

B

5 disust mysel)* De+ression=s inadeuate* A )ull scale emotional colla+se is the minimum reuired to %usti)y lettin eeryone down* C

A

The coward=s way out,

C

5 don=t hae the courae*

B

5 think about you

A

Dream about you

B

Talk about you

A

Can=t et you out o) my system*

M B

5t=s okay*

5 like you in my system*

M No C

+er)ormance needed*

@ne )ine mornin in the month o) May*

B No

that=s not it*



A

B Nothin, M None

nothin, 5 did nothin*

o) this matters because 5=m sim+ly not in loe with you*

And 5 am shakin, sobbin with the memory o) her, when she loed me, be)ore 5 was her torturer, be)ore there was no room in me )or her, be)ore we misunderstood, in )act the ery )irst moment 5 saw her, her eyes smilin and )ull o) the sun, and 5 shudder with rie) )or that moment which 5=e been hurtlin away )rom eer since* A

B

4ein aain, bein aain*

M

Moe on*

A

5 look at her breast,

C

A balloon o) milk,

M

2ooner or later,

C

A bubble o) blood,

B

@ne way or another,

C

(urlin blood,

B

That is oin into my mouth,

C

Thick yellow blood,

A

My +ain is nothin com+ared to hers*

C but

but but

A

6and this is crucial8

B

Don=t say no to me*

C

5 kee+ comin back*

B



B

#ebem rado"nale*G

A

5 hae to be where 5 want to be*

M

Can=t hae this aain* We made loe, then she threw u+*

A

C No

one to hel+ me not my )uckin mother neither*

5 crossed two riers and we+t by one*

A M

5 close my eyes and 5 see her close her eyes and she sees you* The scream o) a da))odil,

A M

The stain o) a scream*

C

5 watched my )ather beat my mother with a walkin stick*

A

A stain,

C

An echo,

A

A stain*

B

5=m sorry you saw that*

B

5=m sorry he did it*

A

5 des+air o) des+air*

M No

rerets*

A

5 swear 5 can=t bear to look at you*

C

5 did nothin, nothin*

B

5 did nothin*

C

5 want to )eel +hysically like 5 )eel emotionally*

2tared* M

4eaten*

4roken*

A

He buys me a make3u+ kit, blushers and li+stick and eyeshadow* And 5 +aint my )ace in bruises and blood and cuts and swellin, and on the mirror in dee+ red, (!

C

4e a woman, be a woman, FCK

C M B

(o on*

5 could be your mother*



C

What>

B

Why what>

A

What>

M

When he=s enerous, kind, thouht)ul and ha++y, 5 know he=s hain an a))air*

C

He thinks we=re stu+id, he thinks we don=t know*

M

A third +erson in my bed whose )ace eludes me*

B

#ust me,

A

#ust the way 5 am,

C Nothin M

to be done*

(ie, sym+athise, control*

B Now*

2o tired o) secrets*

C M

5t=s %ust not me* 2he is currently hain some kind o) nerous breakdown and wishes she=d been  born black, male and more attractie* C

B

5 ie mysel)*

C

@r %ust more attractie*

B

5 ie my heart*

C

@r %ust di))erent*

M

4ut that=s not really iin*

C

#ust someone )uckin else*

A

Fraile and chokin* 2he ceases to continue with the day do day )arce o) ettin throuh the ne;t )ew hours in an attem+t to ward o)) the )act that she doesn=t know how to et throuh the ne;t )orty years* C

A

5 loe you still,

B

Aainst my will* 2he=s talkin about hersel) in the third +erson because the idea o) bein who she is, o) acknowledin that she is hersel), is more than her +ride can take* C

B

With a )uckin eneance* 2he=s sick to the )uckin ills o) hersel) and wishes wishes wishes that somethin would ha++en to make li)e bein* C

A

5=m a much nicer +erson since 5 had an a))air*

C



B

Why what>

C

What>

M

Why are you cryin>

A

There=s no news here*

B