Overcoming Obstacles and Objections

Overcoming Obstacles and Objections

! ! I. Why do women test men? ! !

a. They have a legitimate reason - she really has a bf - she really does need use the bathroom or find her friends b. She’s interested in you and wants to see if you’re congruent

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c. She wants to feel your strength/power = massive attraction

! d. Women test men even in a relationship so get used to it! ! ! II. Basic Principles ! a. Be unaffected and completely non reactive ! ! !

b. Manage the tension - Women like tension. Men tend to break the tension - “would your boyfriend be mad that I’m hitting on you?” c. Do what she doesn’t expect. Surprise Her. - Her: “I have a boyfriend” You: “Oh that deserves a hug”

d. She may be trying to get you to jump through her hoop so instead you can create a hoop for her - Her: “Buy me a drink” You: “Well I don’t buy girls drinks right away but I’ll buy you the next round if you get the first round”

! ! III. Ignore ! a. Ignore anything that doesn’t help you ! - Her: “I have to go” You: “Oh That reminds me…”

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- You: “Cool tattoo, what does that tattoo mean?” Her: “I got it when my fiancé died” You: “What does that other tattoo mean?”

IV. Agree and Absurdify

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- Her: “I don’t give out my number.” You: “Of course you don’t, we’ll just have to use telepathy”

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- Her: “I don’t give out my number” You: “It’ll be ok, I’m just gonna call you 50 times a day” (a guy who really calls a girl 50 times a day would never admit it)

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- Her: turns her back on you You: “You do that so well. I have a lil sister and she gets hit on all the time so you have to teach me so I can show her. Is it like this?” Turn away in a way that’s making fun of her.

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- Her: “No I won’t go with you” You: “My God, how refreshing...Someone who can say no... So many people have trouble saying no...they give all those lame excuses”

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- Her: “I have a boyfriend” You: “Of course but I’m from the boyfriend replacement agency and I’m sorry to inform you that he’s broken up with you”

! ! V. NLP Formula for Agree and Absurdify ! ! ! ! !

a. Talk about what is. Agreement - Use “I understand…” or “of course…” - “I understand you don’t give your number away…” or “of course you have a boyfriend…” b. Talk about what isn’t. Negation - Use “and its not like…” - “And its not like I’m asking you to passionately make out with me” - “ And its not like we’re going to have hot passionate sex all night long…” c. Talk about how it isn’t Suggestions - Use positive statements “…make out passionately…” - “…start to hang out just like lovers, and make out passionately…” d. Talk about how it could be. Negotiation - Use “but if we did…” or “but if you would…” - “It’d be fun to at least get to know each other a little bit more…” e. Talk about what will be. Direction or Restriction

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- Use “So I tell you what…” or “so lets at least…” or “but if we did have sex you’d have to promise me you wouldn’t become a sex crazed nympho stalker.” - “So I tell you what, lets at least find a way to be in touch and briefly chat some more…” - “I understand you have a bf, and its not like we’re going to have hot passionate sex, yet it’d be fun to…”

! ! VI. Turn It Around On Her !

- Her: “I have a boyfriend” You: “Slow down, you’re already thinking about me as boyfriend material, jeez?”

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- Her: “Here’s my card” You: “what! your business card? That’s lame. no thanks, give me your number”

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- Her: “Are you a pick up artist?” You: “Really? Is that the best you got? Lame!”

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- Her: “You’re such a dick” You: “Yeah but you love dick I can tell”

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- Her: “I don’t like your shirt” You: “Well it doesn’t like you either”

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- Her: “buy me a drink” You: “sure you buy the first round and I’ll buy the second round”

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- Her: “Are you gay?” You: “I don’t think so…lets find out” then go in for a kiss

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- Her: “You’re not my type” You: “You don’t seem like the type that has a type”

! ! VII. Canned !

- “You are just too adorable” - “What are we gonna do with you?” - “Hold out your hand” (smack it) “Bad girl” - Her: “Fuck off” You: “oh I get it. You probably act this way all the time. And I bet most people buy it. But I don’t buy it. I bet you act all rude to people and a lot of people think

you’re a bitch, but I think you’re like a candy all hard on the outside but all soft on the inside.”

! ! VIII. Infield Assignments ! ! !

a. Go back to your list of objections from last week, or if you didn’t do it make a list of things that have thrown you off in the past. Write down 3 possible responses for each. Keep this up all week every time a woman says anything to you that “throws you off”. b. Approaching: 1 approach a day (or 7 total throughout the week). Go for an instant date 3 times this week and TRY to get an objection. Go for the number even if she says she has a boyfriend in hopes to get an objection. Then go back to your journal and write down the objection and come up with 3 possible responses. c. Inner Game: adapt the attitude, “I hope I get a test so I can practice and possibly learn something!”