Naked by Michael Brown

NAKED EXPLORING THE RADIANCE & REVELATION OF INTIMACY

WELCOME... Reading NAKED as a book - in the sequence in which it is written - is highly recommended. Injoy!

INDEX READY .................................................................................................................................................... 4 OVERVIEW ............................................................................................................................................. 5 CORE-S-ILL .......................................................................................................................................... 11 AN INTIMATE INTENT ......................................................................................................................... 12 MIRRORS WORK I - INITIATING INTIMACY WITH MYSELF ............................................................. 14 IN 10 2 B B 4 4 PLAY............................................................................................................................ 15 THE TWO-FISTED PUNCH .................................................................................................................. 19 MIRRORS WORK II - SUMMONING ALL OUR RESOURCES ........................................................... 29 SEXUALITY AND INTIMACY, Part I & II .............................................................................................. 32 LISTENING - KEY TO INTIMACY ........................................................................................................ 33 I FEEL YOU........................................................................................................................................... 36 SOME STEPPING STONES................................................................................................................. 41 INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part I – Crucifying Ourselves .................................................. 44 INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part II – Mother Dear .............................................................. 48 INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part III – Oh brother! ............................................................... 50 INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part IV – Sister Of Mercy. ....................................................... 52 INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part V – Our Father Who Art. ................................................. 54 INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part VI – Resurrection. ........................................................... 56 EASTER MESSAGE: Walk On Water .................................................................................................. 58 EXPERIENCE NOT PERSON .............................................................................................................. 64 RESONACE OF AN ENCOUNTER ...................................................................................................... 65 BECOME THE ANSWER...................................................................................................................... 68 AMAZING GAZING - PART I - Intent .................................................................................................... 73 AMAZING GAZING - PART II - How To ............................................................................................... 74 AMAZING GAZING - PART III - Being Saves....................................................................................... 77 AMAZING GAZING - PART IV - The Consequences ........................................................................... 78 AMAZING GAZING - PART V - The Bridge .......................................................................................... 82 CURRENTLY COMPLETE ................................................................................................................... 85

Sunday, March 8, 2009

READY Throughout the last six month process of repositioning and resettling myself, I have consistently been asking [internally] what the most significant contribution is I may make to our human experience at this time? The same answer comes back over and over again: To share the insights I receive/d from my experiential exploration into intimacy with you. I know from my own explorations that exploring intimacy in all its profound radiance is one of the most significant inner/outer journeys we humans are wired to enter. Exploring intimacy experientially - and the consequences of doing so - is such an extensive topic for discussion - and the revelations awakened are profound, liberating, and paradigm shifting. I intend now using this blog site to share whatever comes up in the moment as I now revisit the insights and revelations gifted to me through all my consciously and unconsciously entered intimate encounters. Posted by Michael... at 3:42 AM

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Monday, March 9, 2009

OVERVIEW

Exploring intimacy consciously only became important to me once I first activated my intent to reestablish the frequency of authenticity, and then of integrity, within myself.

Until I explored the relevance of authenticity and integrity within my own life experience, when I heard the word „intimacy‟, I mistakenly only associated it with words like „relationship‟ and „sex‟. Yes, exploring intimacy does include reexamining the experiences we call „our sexuality‟ and „our relationships‟, however, these two aspects are simply two granules on the beach of what a full encounter with intimacy encompasses.

My exploration into the resonance of authenticity empowered me to experientially discover that the quality of my experience was indeed „authored within me'. It led me into the discovery of the consequences of emotional imprinting, and the realization that within the first seven years of my life, my energetic system is deliberately tattooed by accumulated childhood experiences. Exploring authenticity revealed to me - that from my childhood experiences onward - that until I consciously impacted this predicament, it was this imprinted energetic pattern to which my circumstances bowed as being „the current causal point of my unfolding experience‟. Accordingly, I arrived at the realization that, „I only activated the resonance of authenticity within myself when I consciously embraced the responsibility to impact this imprinting in a way empowering me to become the author of my unfolding destiny‟ – as opposed to having the circumstances of my life

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unconsciously dictated by an inherited, energetic, generational pattern.

In entering my exploration into the resonance of authenticity, I realized it was not any scripted behavior, or set of moral rules followed, or predetermined way of portraying myself to others, which qualified me as being „an authentic person‟. Authenticity revealed itself to me simply as, „the consequences of intending response over reaction within each moment of my unfolding life experience‟.

To respond consciously reawakens authenticity. To react unconsciously propagates pretence.

My exploration into the resonance of authenticity then led me directly into an exploration into my personal level of integrity.

Until I had commenced reactivating authenticity within my life experience, I assumed integrity had something to do with, ‘an alignment of my behavior with some appropriate moral or socially acceptable code of conduct’. However, my intent to reactivate and nurture the frequency of integrity within myself led to the discovery that my ability to resonate with integrity is directly related to my ability to integrate, and that my ability to integrate arose from my awareness of, and my capacity to work with, an energetic matrix I have since called The Pathway Of Awareness and its associated Seven Year Cycle. [These are both discussed in depth within THE PRESENCE PROCESS, ALCHEMY OF THE HEART, and various audios and writings available on http://www.thepresenceportal.com/ ]

The revelation of The Pathway of Awareness and The Seven Year Cycle is that as I entered the world as a child and approached my adulthood, my awareness deliberately moved along a predetermined energetic trail: For the first seven years I operated primarily emotionally, as ‘a child’. This was a time in which I was energetically imprinted [mostly through experiences impacting me at the level of felt-perception] to the point that my emotional condition became a precisely defined energetic pattern. For the next seven years I operated primarily mentally, as a young boy – ‘a teenager’. This was a time in which I went to school, learned to read, write, count, and in doing so, to mentally translate the imprinted energetic patterns of my childhood into a conceptual reality which I now call ‘telling stories’. 6

For the next seven years, a period which included and followed my physiological transformation called puberty – my focus then became increasingly physically-transfixed. I was deliberately steered into entering the physical parameters of my participation in ‘the adult world’. The Pathway Of Awareness as I entered the human experience therefore initially moved through three Seven Year Cycles that went from emotional to mental and into the physical.

My exploration into reawakening my integrity therefore had nothing to do with adhering to some sort of socially acceptable and appropriate moral code of conduct. Instead, it lay within my conscious integration and relationship with the emotional, mental and physical - the attributes that made up ‘the structure and mechanics of transient aspects of my unfolding human experience’. Integrity was therefore about 'the structure of my experience', and how sound my way of relating to it is. Reawakening integrity therefore lay within my establishing a conscious relationship with the emotional, mental, and physical parameters of my human experience in such a way that correctly aligned my personal intent with the intended roles/functions of these three attributes.

While I mistakenly attempted to impact the mental aspect of my experience [my thoughts, concepts, and stories] and the physical aspects of my experience [my physical body and the physical circumstances through which I constantly moved] as the causal point of anything, I remained what I now regard as, ‘out of integrity’. It was only when I embraced my imprinted emotional condition as being ‘the currently relevant causal point of the quality of my human experience’ that I authentically reactivated my integrity. Then, my physical world became of service to me as a mirror – as a divine messenger manifest in a myriad of forms showing me outwardly what I did not yet have the capacity to perceive inwardly about my imprinted energetic condition. And then, my mental world became as a conceptual passageway delivering my awareness from the revelation of the outer physical mirror, inwardly, toward the point of actual felt-perception that experientially revealed the texture of imprinted emotional condition requiring impacting with my compassionate awareness. 7

Very importantly, I also realized that, ‘the emotional aspect of my experience is only a causal point while it remained imprinted in a manner that distorts the radiance of my authentic essence’ – which I now call the vibrational. In other words, the imprinted emotional body is ‘the current causal point’ – not ‘the actual causal point’. This is because the actual casual point of all is what I call ‘the vibrational’ – and, the vibrational to me is that which is beyond the confines of the transient conditions of time and space in which the emotional, mental, and physical operate.

I realized that unless I embarked upon the journey of integrating my imprinted emotional condition, my authentic essence – the vibrational – remains masked by this ongoing energetic distortion. This is because - according to The Pathway Of Awareness that was revealed to me -my awareness of the vibrational would continue to first be channeled through, and consequently defined by, the imprinted energetic predicament within my emotional body. I would then encounter it radiance as the consequent emotional distortion [fear, anger, and grief] which would then impact the nature of my mental activity [confusion], which would then impact the reality of my physical circumstances [outer disharmony]. In other words, while remaining emotionally imprinted [programmed], I remain hidden from myself by a mask of radiating energetic distortion.

It became clear to me that if I wanted to real eyes my authentic vibrational essence, it was pointless dabbling with my physical circumstances or my mental make-up – for while imprinted - these remain me mere dancing shadows of reality - as reflections of distortions being initiated by my childhood imprinting. It became obvious to me that, only by impacting these imprinted emotional patterns in a manner that integrated their conditioning impact on the vibrational realm emanating through them, would the vibrational reveal itself to me in all its pristine glory. Accordingly, my physical and mental attributes became dethrone as ‘the rulers of my world’, and once again took up their rightful positions as ‘servants’ – whose primary task in my evolution is to lead me into a greater awareness of my imprinted emotional condition. I subsequently took outdated assumptions like, ‘thought creates’, and ‘I think therefore I am’, and tossed them into the trash.

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Consequently, ‘feeling to heal’, or ‘being unconditionally with the felt-aspect of my discomforts’, replaced ‘understanding’ and ‘outer doings’ as a tool for causal integration.

It was therefore only through the insights and revelations of exploring authenticity and integrity that I finally committed myself to the task of integrating my imprinted emotional condition as being of the highest priority. And, it was only when I made this commitment to myself – to feel to heal - that I discovered the profound relevance of intimacy within the evolution of my human experience. Without first activating authenticity and integrity – exploring intimacy remains a shallow excavation of a very, very deeply concealed artifact. Consequently, the word intimacy revealed itself to me as, ‘into me and see’. [Not as into-youand-see.]

Accordingly, my entire outer physical life experience, and the concepts and stories I attached to it, become as divine opportunities assisting me within the exploration of my inner emotional condition. Then, the exploration of intimacy, wielded as a deliberate intent, becomes the key to unlocking the emotionally imprinted doorway that masks – through the resonance of its imprinted energetic distortion – the true face of my vibrational essence.

The moment I committed myself to becoming intimate with myself, I automatically activated what I call ‘a radiance’. This activated radiance brings with it an ongoing unfolding of revelation and insight previously hidden from me. It is the illuminations of this ongoing radiance, and its consequential revelations and insights, that I now seek to share with you. Some of these that we shall explore along the way include: - The realization that intimacy is much more than ‘relationships and sex’. We shall examine how it raises these two frequencies to their highest potential.

- The revelation that consciously activating authentic intimacy within our human experience is the key to experientially knowing what we are, what love is, and so what God is.

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But, there are many other fruits to this journey – and I will discuss them too from the point of view of my personal experiences. In its most profound revelation – intimacy reveals, and hence dismantles, the camouflaged resonance of inner and hence outer manipulation through which the physical and mental set themselves up as dictators, who for eons have enslaved the emotional. Exploring intimacy authentically liberates us men [for we require it most] from our conceited historic perspectives – and when we are liberated – all woman within our experience are naturally allow ‘to be’.

When I realized the consequences of awakening authentically, with integrity, into what the experience of exploring intimacy offers – I discovered that such a journey is simultaneously the most painful and beautiful exploration I may ever undertake. It is also the most well-hidden, because by keeping this frequency of ‘being with ourselves’ concealed from ourselves, we remain ignorant of what we actually are, what love actually is, and what God actually is for us. And, while this ignorance reigns supreme – we live a life as humans doing everything conditionally [mainly for others], instead of humans being unconditionally with each other [for us all]. And, this is possibly enough of an overview of my intended exploration into intimacy to get us going. I invite you to join me for this ride, and I invite you to take a moment to share your insights. Posted by Michael... at 6:04 AM

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Tuesday, March 10, 2009

CORE-S-ILL I heard this story once about a boy-child born into this world. The first thing that happened was his mother's nipple was thrust into his face. Then, after a relatively short period, it was removed and forever hidden away from him. Poor little fellow, without him consciously realizing it, he spent the rest of his life trying to see it and suck on it again. Every women he met became a potential candidate for this desperately sought reunion. He was often hungry and restless because of this dilema. Then, one day he met a very wise women. She said to him - "I am not your mother - No woman is - Leave my breasts alone - God is your only Mother - Go find her nipple and don't come back until you know what I am. Only then will I lay naked in your arms." This really messed up everything for him. He had lived his whole life up to that moment assuming he knew what love is and why he did what he did in the world. It was a shocking revelation: MAN-NIPPLE-NATION ... MANIPULATION! Within this revelation he perceived clearly that while he treated women this way, while he treated ANYTHING this way - he was nothing more than an insatiable sucker. Oh! I suddenly realized...this is a story about me! Posted by Michael... at 11:00 AM

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Friday, March 13, 2009

AN INTIMATE INTENT Approaching intimacy authentically is to sincerely ask the question:

“What is love?” We are in error if, after asking such a question, we then attempt to use our intellect to provide the answer. Such an approach would be the same as a child in kindergarten attempting to come to terms with The Theory of Relativity.

An experiential awareness of what love actually is comes to us from what we do not know.

The capacity to authentically intimately comprehend love is given, not gotten, because attaining it is beyond our current physical limitations, mental understandings, and imprinted emotional predicament. However, this does not for a moment mean we cannot dive into its unfathomable depths. On some divine level this „diving into an experiential awareness of what love is‟, and most likely „drowning what we currently assume about ourselves in the depths of what is revealed‟, is what we are here for.

Love is what I am here for. What we may trust is that by sincerely asking “What is love?” we invite a wave of unexpected dismantling and re-framing of everything „we thought love was‟. This means a dismantling and reframing of everything as we thought we knew it, us, and our world to be. This dismantling and reframing of everything is what most of us are alluding to when we declare: “On some level the idea of exploring intimacy frightens me.”

It is therefore important to approach an exploration into intimacy as humbly as possible. We are to expect to, at times, to be humiliated along the way as our assumptions shatter. It is important to ask the question “What is love?” from the point of view of one who sincerely admits to knowing anything about it – even if we still mentally assume we do. Asking “What is love?” is the same as asking “What am I?” or “What is God?” There are no greater questions – and when asked sincerely – the experience we are setting ourselves up for cannot be surpassed or in any way anticipated. What is also useful, when asking such a question, is to remind ourselves we are living in an „ask and receive‟ and not an „ask and go get‟ universe. This may not be obvious to us right now, because we live on a planet infatuated with seeking answers, not asking the questions. Whenever we ask a question we automatically seek a fast food version of the answer – one that can be instantly transmitted to us through a book or through mental communication from someone we assume 12

„knows‟. Others may impart 'their understandings' to us – but only we have the capacity to truly „know‟. „Knowing‟ is a deeply, intimately, personal experience. Accepting others understandings as being „the answer‟ won‟t wash if we are serious about exploring intimacy. Our task is not to answer the question, “What is love?” - our only task is to ask it. The question is causal – the answer if the effect. We currently live in a cause and effect paradigm, and this arrangement works well for us when we work it. It also works against us when we ignore it – or are ignore-ant of it. Whenever we ask a question and „go get‟ the answer using our limited physical, mental, and emotional capacities – we confine the caliber of the answer gained. What love is cannot be know through any level of confinement. For many – such limiting answers may be enough. Most of us believe what we read in books and see on TV over and above what our experience is actually revealing to us in each moment. Such an approach won‟t benefit us if we intend exploring intimacy authentically.

Approaching intimacy authentically requires embracing our experience as it is unfolding in each moment as being our most highly honored teacher. When we ask “What is love?” we are served best by not trying to figure out how to answer this question emotionally, mentally, and physically. The most efficient approach is to stay in the question – to remain in a causal-consciousness about it.

When we approach the adventure of exploring intimacy in this way the answer unfolds organically - in an integrated manner - somehow revealing itself miraculously through the limited parameters of our ongoing emotional, mental, and physical experience. Only love itself knows how to accomplish an intimate response to our seeking. Being integrated and organic, the answer to this question unfolds in a manner tailored specifically for us – in a manner we are able to experientially contain according to our current perceptual capacities.

We commence such a profound journey by simply and sincerely asking:

“What is love?” Posted by Michael... at 9:10 AM

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Friday, March 13, 2009

MIRRORS WORK I - INITIATING INTIMACY WITH MYSELF

I once sat in front of a mirror and told myself everything about myself I hid from others. I even told myself about those things I pretended to hide from myself. I spoke without judgement. It was a matter-of-fact, spoken out loud, honest revealing of myself to myself about myself.

As I spoke, I felt an energetic weight lift. The more I revealed to myself about myself, the lighter I felt. I always assumed I already knew these things - but there was a part of me that felt uncomfortable - neglected - ignored - because I never told it anything. I never let myself in. No one taught me how to let myself in...

I slept so well that night and awoke the next morning with a wonderful sense of lightness - a sense of spaciousness. I felt closer to myself after that. For the first time in my life I felt like I was actually my friend.

I am my friend. I am my best friend. No matter who comes and goes I am always going to be around. Now, I trust myself with my deepest secrets. However, I do not know this to be true unless I speak to myself every day as if this is true. So, every day I go to the mirror and speak

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to myself. When I forget to, when days go by without a chat, I notice a dulling in my experience.

Contrary to what we are led to believe - speaking to ourselves is a healthy sign of sanity.

Once we real eyes the significance of speaking honestly with ourselves daily, we are amazed [and amused] at how much time we have wasted speaking to others about matters only we have the capacity to impact. Posted by Michael... at 12:10 PM

Saturday, March 14, 2009

IN 10 2 B B 4 4 PLAY It is a confirmation to me of where we are at, that the essence of more than a few of the "Comments" on this blog site - and of the emails I am now receiving - relate - or subtly assume and insinuate - that the exploration of intimacy is an examination of 'a way of relating to others'. Specifically sexually. When we assume this, we are misled, and our accomplishments within this exploration empty of what is profoundly possible. Then, we mistakenly use The Holy Grail as a coffee cup. When the word 'intimacy' is used in our world, because of the paradigm of projection through which we now stumble - it is natural we relate intimacy as being about 'our relationships with others' -specifically with 'our lover'. However, there is only one relationship that truly counts: The way we are relating to ourselves. This is why the journey of exploring intimacy - as it is unfolding here on NAKED commences with EXPLORING INTIMACY WITH and WITHIN MYSELF. This is a topic we shall explore for some time yet. This is the foundation upon which we acquire the key to reopen the secret doorway into Camelot which was deliberately shut and seemingly sealed forever by our fear-based, ungodly, religious programming.

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An authentic exploration of intimacy intends returning us to The Kingdom of The Heart, not The Boredom of the unconscious and addictive reign of the penis and vagina. Through all my twisting and turning, tripping and tumbling, it is clear to me - joyfully and painfully so - that my way of relating to myself is 'the primary relationship' upon which the qualities of all my ways of relating within this world are founded. When this primary relationship is empty or inadequate - I addictively pursue and use every aspect of the world for one application only: To achieve an orgasm. Of course, there are profoundly infinite dimensions involved in exploring this 'relationship with myself' - and, we shall explore as many of them as I can express. And, along the way, we shall real eyes as clearly as a desert sunset following an afternoon downpour, that the quality of all our projected relationships - whether they be with our family, lovers, cats, dogs, and plants, are directly determined by the resonance of the way we are currently relating to ourselves. Yes, I repeat myself - but this is because this realization is causal and therefore cannot be lightly skipped over. If I assume I am capable of establishing authentic intimate interactions with others when I am not yet able to be is way with and within myself - I am still functioning from pretence - not presence. Then, I am still functioning as if 'the quality of my encounter with the perceived other is happening to me' - as opposed to through me. It is natural in this world, that when we hear the word intimacy, we want to rush into discussions about penises and vagina's, about nipples and soft inner thighs. This is 'the program'. These discussions have absolutely no constructive value until we develop the capacity to embraced certain realizations about the dynamics and mechanics of 'relating to ourselves'. Without first intending initiating authentic intimacy with and within ourselves our sexual expressions remain camouflaged violence. If we have not yet initiated sincere, inner, intimate exploration - all our outer attempts at intimacy are merely unconscious and hazardous encounters with reflections of unintegrated emotional signatures more efficiently approached within the sanctuary of our own sacred company.

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If I do not first unravel and awaken to the revelations inherent in exploring intimacy with and within myself - then, I inadvertently use my outer relationships for self-deceptive purposes. Then, I try to work my personal stuff out with my family. Then, I try to work family stuff out with my lover. Then, I try to work my lover stuff out with my religion. Then my spiritual life is a farce. Consequently, all that unfolds is frustration, confusion, and an ongoing empty resonance of disappointment and dissatisfaction. Then, instead of attending to my inner child work, I call my lover, 'my baby', or I say to her, 'Come to daddy', and other ridiculously immature and revealing expressions that show I am misplacing my intimate point of you. What is my intimate point of you? "Won't you be my baby tonight?" "No, grow up already, go do your inner child work, and stop projecting that stuff onto me." "I wanna be, your Teddy Bear..." "Listen, didn't you hear a word I have been saying?" "Aww cummon, come to daddy..." "Do yourself and me a big favor: Go home and sit around the dinner table with your family and parents until you are at peace there. Don't bring that unresolved crap into our bedroom! This is not what a lover is for." Those of us seeking to skip over the crucial steps of initiating authentic 'intimacy with ourselves', and then 'intimacy within our families', and who would rather go right to the penis and vagina, are best served by being confined to activities such as urination. This is because we do not yet have the capacity to contain the journey inherent in relating to another as 'a lover'. When we have not yet first taken these crucial steps, our lover becomes a fleshy object beaten with the stick of our unresolved emotional signatures. These particular emotional signatures are always most efficiently approached and integrated alone. Then, carefully and compassionately examined in the context of 'our way of relating to the members of our birth

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family'. And, only then explored within the loving embrace of a complete stranger's arms and eyes. Through NAKED I do intend exploring the dimension of 'intimacy with a lover' - in great depth - in a manner some of you may not yet have been exposed to. However, if I enter this conversation right now - without first establishing a stable context -what shall be gained shall be shallow at best. An authentic exploration into intimacy is not about propping up, patching, and simply making do with a recycled version of a paradigm, which at its core, is impotent. [We are not politicians dealing with our planetary economic situation.] Exploring intimacy authentically is about shattering this impotent paradigm completely by revealing the radiance and revelation of a way of relating to ourselves, to our family, to our lover, and to all perceived others, that comes from beyond the confining habitual parameters of our imprinted behaviors. I am in no hurry to approach these revelations. I am not even at the foreplay stage of the 'exploration into intimacy' yet. Through this sacred work, we call 'what love is' to ourselves so we may have the profound opportunity to set Her free. To, at this point, bring up the topic of vagina's and penises is nothing more than sloppy premature ejaculation. I seek to be the one person I know who is prepared to be with 'what love is' in way that does not cage, confine, and attempt to use Her as a container for manipulation and ejaculation. How about you? First having the patience and willingness to explore intimacy within myself is the honoring of the primary relationship from which the quality of all other ways of relating radiate. This honoring approach initiates the vulnerability that attracts Love's attention. So, those of you now emailing me with sexual questions - like, "Will the breathing enlarge my penis?" Or, "How do I find the right sexual partner to start this journey into intimacy with?" - quit it! Going anywhere near sex when we have not first initiated the intent to become authentically intimate toward and within ourselves, is like giving a religious fundamentalist a nuclear bomb: Everyone ends up getting fucked and any awareness of 'what love is' becomes obliterated. 18

We are right at the beginning of a marvellous journey. Best we take our attention off the orgasm for now. It is easier to take off our clothes than to become truly naked. However, as I and many of you may have already discovered - easy is overrated. Posted by Michael... at 9:51 PM

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

THE TWO-FISTED PUNCH

At the core of all intimacy work is the gentle and efficient dismantling of manipulation. When our reality is not manipulated, it effortlessly reveals itself exactly as it is - as an expression of the vibrational - and not as it is currently portrayed to be. All portrayed appearances then dissolve into actuality and pretence into Presence.

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It is only possible to perceive the multi-dimensional parameters of our ongoing manipulative behavior upon the outer world - and the dire impact this intent has upon the quantity and quality of our life experience - when we are able to experientially observe this unfolding within the way we behave toward ourselves.

It is our awareness of this manipulative approach toward life that empowers us to integrate and so heal - this predicament.

'Awareness' and 'intent' are the only tools of transformation we require to accomplish this task.

Whenever we place our awareness upon something - it begins to move - and it moves according to the dimensions of our intent in that specific moment.

It is therefore necessary to bring our awareness into the mechanics of our ongoing intent to manipulate - to examine how manipulation comes about - and through this to perceive clearly what consequence this behavior has within the relationships between the emotional, mental, and physical attributes that represent the expression of the vibrational called, 'our human experience'.

Again - a experiential comprehension of The Pathway Of Awareness and The Seven Year Cycle within the unfolding of our own life experience serve to facilitate this awareness.

[From this point onwards, I am making entries on this blog site from the point of view that you have already taken the time to read THE PRESENCE PROCESS and/or ALCHEMY OF THE HEART, and that you have explored the wide range of free materials available on the 20

website [ http://www.thepresenceportal.com/ ], and are therefore familiar with these two foundational aspects of this work.

If you have not, I suggest you do so, as the comprehension of the movement of our awareness from the vibrational, through the emotional, then mental, and into the physical as we enter and manifest our human experience - and, the movement of our awareness from the physical, through the mental, then the emotional, and into the vibrational as we reawaken into an experiential encounter with 'what is' - are crucial throughout all our intimate explorations.

I have taken the time to explain these on many occasions and through the many formats on the website's facilities - free audios, available CD's, free down loadable writings, DVD's, etc. Accordingly, I am not going to repeat this explanation in great detail beyond that which is required to explain what we are specifically dealing with in any given moment.

However, I will say this: If you do not yet have the experiential comprehension of The Pathway Of Awareness and The Seven Year Cycle as a basic foundation - the essence of the intent to explore intimacy - and the profound revelations and insights unfolding from such a journey - will go right over your head, as opposed to efficiently penetrating your heart. Enough said.]

Onward then...

Manipulation is essentially a manifestation of behavioral patterns arising out of our condition of imprinted emotional discomfort. As we move through our childhood experience, we function from a point of view of extreme felt-perception. We are like thirsty sponges drinking in experience primarily through our feeling capacity. Accordingly, every experience we move through saturates our emotional condition with felt-patterns [programs].

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After seven years of childhood, we then enter schooling - the mental aspect of our development - and then at around 14 and our physiological shift called 'puberty' - we again refocus our awareness by placing it increasingly upon the physical aspect of our life experience.

By the time we are what we call, 'an adult', the outer physical world matters to us more than anything else. Consequently, we relate to the material world as if it is the causal point of the quality of all our human experiences. Our subsequent behavior whenever we are uncomfortable reveals the presence of this perceptual error:

Whenever we are uncomfortable we interact with our physical experiences mentally - by thinking about them, by telling stories about them, and by generally relating to them through our 'understanding'.

By the time we encapsulate this adult, physical/mental point of view - the emotional aspect of our experience becomes a back-seat driver. "Shut up back there, can't you see I'M driving." We are aware we have emotions - however, we do not regard this aspect of our experience as relevant when attempting to impact the quality of it. It is our drive - but we do not let it drive.

Generally, habitually, when we attempt to change the quality of our experience - we first observe the physical aspect of it - relate to this physical predicament mentally by telling stories - and then reactively interact with it physically and mentally through the justifications of these stories.

Yet, at the core of the quality of any experience we seek to adjust is 'a feeling'. We only seek to adjust something because of the feeling related to it is impacting us in a way we 22

perceive as uncomfortable. However, as an adult, we do not real eyes this. We assume it is our physical circumstances or our mental functioning that is at fault.

By the time we are adults - because our capacity for felt-perception is numbed almost to the point of paralysis - it is very challenging for us to real eyes it is our imprinted emotional condition - and the uncomfortable felt-aspects radiating from within this - which is causal to any quality of our human experience we call 'uncomfortable'.

By the time we are adults, the role of the emotional attribute within our human experience is for the most part invisible - unnecessary - and, discounted as inconsequential.

We declare, "I really feel bad about this." Yet, when it comes to impacting the predicament we are referring to, we do not attempt to approach our experience of it through the parameters of felt-perception -through our perceptual conduit of 'feeling'. Instead, we attempt to impact it mentally - by thinking about it - and physically - by rearranging the physical circumstances reflecting it.

No matter how bad we feel - we still ignore feeling. Feeling is our blind spot.

Yet, it is our relationship with 'feeling' that is pivotal to comprehending the cause of all manipulation behavior.

Manipulation is a two-fisted-punch through we we continually batter ourselves and our world. The behavior we call 'manipulation' - and 'our complete lack of awareness of the role of felt-perception within the quality of our human experience' - are joined at the hip.

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THE MANIPULATIVE TWO-FISTED PUNCH...

The first blow is the punch we deliver in an attempt to sedate and control any awareness of our authentic emotional predicament. [BAM! OUCH!]

By the time we are adults, we are masters at this. We have developed many behaviors whose only purpose is to distract us from our inner, imprinted, felt-discomfort. We use anything from food to work to sex to drugs to alcohol to pharmaceuticals to TV to accomplish this.

The moment this discomfort arises within our awareness, we reactively do something. Whatever it is we do is based upon the mental story we tell about our arising discomfort. The moment we believe the story we tell about it - we act upon it. The story is never true.

Because our felt-perception is so crippled - even though we are feeling bad - this mental story arises not out of emotional body awareness - but is instead is driven by how this inner emotional condition is being reflected back to us upon the mirror of our outer physical experience.

We think about what to do ,and then act upon these thoughts. Unconsciously, the intent driving this looped mental/physical behavior is the ridding our awareness of the emotionally imprinted discomfort underlying the experience we being faced with.

This sedation and control of what is really happening within us is the first punch we deliver.

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We then immediately deliver another blow:

This second follow-up blow is usually the knockout that keeps us dumbed-down of having any experience of 'what is'. This second punch is represented by our attempt to then forcibly incorporate into our experience the feeling we would rather be having. [BAM! OUCH!]

Again, to accomplish this forced input of felt-experience regarded as preferable - we may use anything from food to work to sex to drugs to alcohol to pharmaceuticals to TV. It doesn't matter - whatever works to assist us to feel better is what we do. We think about it - then we do it. Often we just do it.

So, the first punch is to stun ourselves of any felt-awareness of our imprinted emotional condition - and the second punch, the knockout blow - is to overlay this arising imprinted felt-discomfort with a felt-experience we would rather be having.

In delivering these two blows, we render ourselves completely unconscious to 'what is'. Presence transforms into pretence. Actuality becomes 'a portrayed appearance'. There is no longer any authenticity, integrity - and definitely no possibility of intimacy.

All vulnerability to 'what is' is obliterated.

This ongoing, addictive manipulation, is the ganging up of the physical and mental aspect of our awareness upon the emotional. It is the emotional body that is consistently being battered by these two punches. We refuse to listen to it - and we simultaneously physically impose our well thought-out plans and agendas upon it.

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We don't care what it has to say [through its dialogue of felt-perception]. We do not care about how it really feels. We only care about physically and mentally twisting and distorting it to accomplish a feeling we want according to what we think we are supposed to be feeling.

As an adult, until we bring these mechanics of manipulation into our experiential awareness [bullying], we are doing this within and to ourselves 24 hours a day. Even our dream states reflect this unceasing manipulative activity.

Manipulation is our every attempt to feel better - as opposed to getting better at feeling.

Accordingly, the emotional body becomes a whore, a prostitute, whose only purpose is to "shut up!", and when speaking - to only do so in a language decided upon as appropriate by the mental, and provided by the physical.

The consequence is that there is zero awareness within us of that actuality of the vibrational. We cannot authentically feel what peace or love is. We cannot authentically feel what we are or what God is for us. We only perceive distorted forms of these vibrations, which we then relate to as fear, anger, and grief.

Consequently, we are blind to the awareness that the experiential portal into the vibrational through which its attributes manifest within our mental and physical expressions - and through which we return into a full awareness of it while in human form - is the emotional.

The emotional is 'the door'. Yet, we unconsciously and reactively build an entire life experience founded upon slamming this door closed, and in place of it, out of our thinking 26

and doing, we manufacture artificial doors we believe have the capacity to deliver us into an authentic awareness of the vibrational.

These artificial doors we then call 'our spirituality', or 'metaphysics', and 'religion'.

Yet, without acknowledgement of the emotional body as the causal entry point into experiential vibrational awareness - these manufactured doors open only into illusionary pathways leading forever nowhere. Our 'hells' are simply experiences in which The Presence of The Vibrational is perceptually masked from our awareness - a predicament manifest entirely of our own thinking and doing.

What the heart reveals to me through the experiential application of alchemy is simple yet profound:

Until I am able to experientially perceive this predicament of ongoing manipulation within myself - I am blind to the actuality that the community upon this entire planet is reeling 24 hours a day from the consequences of this behavioral dysfunction. [BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! BAMBAM OUCH! BAM-BAM OUCH! Ad infinitum... ]

And, until I experientially enter the alchemical procedures empowering me to realign this energetic flow so that my behavior honors The Pathway Of Awareness -I actually believe I can rectify this predicament by thinking about it - and then by fiddling with the physical aspects of my outer world experience. And, while I conduct myself this way, I am lost: I am cleaning the mirror in an attempt to heal the pimples on my face.

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Exploring intimacy with and within myself commences in the exact moment I bow to my emotional body as the current causal point of the quality of my human experience.

Exploring intimacy with and within myself commences in the exact moment I commit to feeling what it is I am really feeling.

Exploring intimacy with and within myself commences in the exact moment I stop attempting to mask what I am really feeling with feelings I would rather be having.

Until this step into alchemy is consciously and experientially entered - the step into being with what is without condition - no authenticity or integrity or intimacy is possible.

Intimacy commences the moment I commit to cease the behavior of knocking myself out and instead make a commitment to consciously commence knocking upon the door of what is truly unfolding within me. Posted by Michael... at 7:12 PM

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Saturday, March 21, 2009

MIRRORS WORK II - SUMMONING ALL OUR RESOURCES

We know so little of ourselves, and often we relate to ourselves according to this limited awareness.

Sometimes, I have discovered it useful to behave according to 'the consequence of a premise', even though I may as yet have limited experiential evidence of its truth.

Many have told us, 'we are gods'. Many have told us, 'we are God'. Yet, for the most part, we

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embrace limiting behaviors because we as yet do not have any tangible, experiential evidence of such a profound truth. We may verbally declare to others we believe such a revelation to be true. However, much our behavior seldom reflects our faith in such a premise.

I have known for a long time that there is more to me than meets the eye. The physical world is a screen behind which dance immense dimensional experiences. I feel this to be true: That there are a multitude of aspects of myself who pop in and out of my experience, facilitating me as required. They have great powers I seldom comprehend. Many of these attributes have been unconsciously and addictively censored from my mundane perceptual awareness because society, in its present form, offers no avenue for such expression.

One day I decided to speak to myself in the mirror as if I was talking to all aspects of myself.

I intended the mirror to become as 'a portal' through which I communicate with these unseen aspects.

What moved me into such action was my realization that parts of what I am appeared to often sabotage me. They appeared to have intents outside those I have presently cultivated through my emotional integration and development practices. They appeared to be uninformed of my realizations. They appeared to interfere with my capacity to be consistent. I obviously had not taken the time to fill myself in.

For example, for most of my life my child self believed that the people I most love have to at some point leave, often tragically, so it is best not to love them completely and unconditionally, because I end up getting hurt.

Of course, I as an adult, now feel completely differently about the transient nature of the physical experience. Accordingly, those I love dearly are those I seek most to set free.

However, despite my current realization about this, a part of myself still resorted to sticky, clingy behavior. Accordingly, I spoke to myself in the mirror and filled myself in. I shared my insights about 'letting what I love go'. Since then, I notice I am able to let go with greater ease, and that everything I let go returns transformed, bringing with it a multitude of blessings.

One day I decided to use the mirror as a means to get all abroad - as a portal to summon my resources into a movement of collective intent. The intent to do this came out of a realization that there are as yet unseen aspects of myself not at all limited by my current emotional, mental, and physical expressions. Consequently, they are able to move through the world in mysterious ways, accomplishing tasks seemingly outside the construct of my current time and space paradigm.

They have miraculous powers!

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I began talking to myself in the mirror with transformed intent. I began requesting all aspects of myself to come aboard - to support intents I realized as healthy, useful, and unifying.

For example, just recently I had a visit from my dear friend, Anton Feun. During one of our wonderfully intimate conversations on the porch over tea, he shared a piece of priceless wisdom. I sat with it, digested it, and now receive great nutrition from it. Once clear on how this realization impacts my overall intent, I went to the mirror and discussed it with myself. I said:

"Hey guys, I got something new to share with you. I like it and I hope you consider embracing it. You know how we meet all sorts of people in this world. And, on first meeting, though we come from completely different walks of life, we surprisingly discover we share the same profound truths. This immediately brings us closer together, right. But, then we make a fatal error: Without being asked to by them, we commence explaining in great detail why we believe what we believe. We start with 'the because' aspect of is truth - the mental body's reason for accepting and applying it. The shortfall of us behaving this way is that everyone who shares this exact same truth has come about it along a journey very personal to them. Just like us, they got to Rome, but upon a completely different road. So, when we place emphasis on the, 'This is true because...', we shift from having a beautifully shared truth, to manifesting a perceptual divide - and a seeming point of separation then opens up like a canyon between us. The next thing we are declaring war on each other! So guys, all I seek to share with you today is this: Our truths are all valid, and extremely powerful when embraced as part of our overall intent. We ought to live by them as best we can. However, unless someone specifically asks us how we came upon our truths - lets not start with 'the because' stuff. By ceasing this behavior, we diminish the amount of division between ourselves and all other human expressions of the vibrational in this world. And, by the way, we have a bowls match this afternoon, I may not have told you about it yet. We also have a dinner gathering afterward. So, lets have as much fun as we can possibly fit into the occasion. Thank you for listening my friend. Thank you for everything. I love you with all my heart - even when I am not able to feel or show it."

Then, I carry on with my life.

In the morning I attempt to remember to tell myself what I have on the cards for the day - and I ask for 'full participation' - so that every petal on the plant points toward the face the sun. Sometimes, I forget to speak to myself for a day or two. When I realize I have strayed from this aspect of intimately communing with myself, I apologise, laugh about it, and continue.

When I apply my mirror work consistently, I experience the magic of synchronicity - of taking the required action at the perfect time - and of feeling as if I am being supported through a myriad of dimensions as yet unseen and unknown to me. Accordingly, the feeling of 'loneliness' evaporates, and then the experience of 'being alone with myself' transforms into deeply satisfying encounters with

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many, many other dimensions.

I speak to myself as I seek to be.

Through this magical mirrored portal, my intimate relationship with myself is vastly enhanced. All my resources are summoned, my intent unified, and my overall life experience blessed beyond measure.

When I invite all of myself onboard this ride called 'living', I receive way beyond my capacity to ask. Posted by Michael... at 2:16 AM

Saturday, March 21, 2009

SEXUALITY AND INTIMACY, Part I & II

Two new videos came out today on The Presence Portal YOU TUBE Channel. They have preempted us somewhat. However, they are also right on track with where we are now in our NAKEDness. Enjoy - I absolutely did, and will again. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jhzj9X8vQBU&feature=channel_page http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxRdX7PBFMI&feature=channel Thank you Roger, Niklas, Shannon & Steve. You rock! Posted by Michael... at 1:39 PM

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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

LISTENING - KEY TO INTIMACY Yesterday evening I sat for a while in the back yard with my eyes closed, cat on my lap [Harmony], listening to the orchestra of sound being expressed throughout my environment.

I love to sit, close my eyes, and openly receive the fullness of what my ears hear here - everything they hear here - from cars to birds to ruffling breezes upon chimes to children's playful voices to dogs barking in the distance. I receive it and allow it all to weave into the one, unified, orchestrated movement of a song I call, "God speaking to me".

This 'conscious listening to what is', and embracing it all exactly as it is, invites me into an experience of felt-peace and unity with an efficiency unlike any other activity I know.

Every now and then, one sound may jump out and attempt to grab all my attention. This may be because it appears dissonant. Then, without any warning, I discover I am lost in 'thinking about it'. Within seconds the feeling of unified felt-peace dismantles into internal mental chatter as my thoughts hustle to place the sound back into where they think it should be within the entirety of God's orchestral make-up. Sometimes these thoughts try to make this particular sound 'go away' so I can better hear the stuff I prefer listening to.

Sometimes, because of its immense beauty, a particular sound attempts to capture all my attention. Then, without any warning, I discover I am again unconsciously adrift in thinking about it. I am describing to myself why I like it, etc. Within seconds the feeling of being immersed in unified feltpeace again dismantles into a dullness as my thoughts hustle to 'place this sound above all others', because they think it should be situated in a special place amidst the entirety of God's orchestral make-up.

In both cases, whether because of dissonance of harmony, I real eyes it is not the sound itself grabbing at my attention - but rather the feeling it inspires within me.

It appears I struggle to contain some of the feelings I hear.

This is because they trigger the discomfort of an as yet unintegrated memory within my emotional makeup. Or, for the very same reason, they move me into 'excitement'. Consequently, I addictively 33

and reactively evacuate the felt-aspect of my heard-experience and dive head-long into 'thoughts about it'. Subsequently, the thinking-experience shifts me out of a felt-sense of unified peace and harmony.

As I sat there last night, watching myself go through this experience over and over, I realized this simple illustration is the crux of alchemy and intimacy.

Both are about listening: Listening with my ears, eyes, nose, tongue, body, and heart. Listening to whatever God is for me - which, when I remember - is everything.

Alchemy is so simple - yet, profoundly challenging: Whether I have developed the ranges of my feltcapacity to real eyes this yet or not - whatever impacts me by grabbing my attention does so because of how it causes me to feel. This may be discomfort or excitement.

The challenge is not in stopping or changing the feeling - and, it is not in evacuating my felt-capacity by initiating thinking - but rather in stopping still within what I am hearing, and instead drinking it in - as fully as possible.

To be with the felt-aspect of my experience - just as it is - without any mentally-driven plans, agendas, and predetermined outcomes - is the art of, 'Though art in Heaven'.

This 'being within the feeling of my experience' is an intimate portal. The longer I sit within this intimate portal - unconditionally - the more powerfully I respond to my individual and hence collective experience.

This unconditional felt-response sows spectacular seeds. Hindsight reveals this beyond any doubt. And, it does not matter what these seeds are - because they are always exactly what I require. Again, hindsight reveals this beyond any doubt.

It is this conscious entry into, and conscious containment of, the felt-aspect of my human experience, that initiates authentic 'intimacy within myself'. As a consequence of this consciously felt-encounter, this listening, all unfolds organically, naturally, harmoniously, and miraculously, bringing about my highest good within each moment.

I have therefore strongly encouraged myself to reread 'Revelation Of Being' on the Writings page of the The Presence Portal. Now more than ever, various aspects of God's unified orchestra are facilitating me by appearing chaotic and out of harmony. And, sometimes, overly exciting. This

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radiance is required. And, over the next few months, because so few of us are yet actively listening, my heart informs me the volume is to be turned up to an unprecedented level.

Listen now Michael, or be blasted unexpectedly.

I asked for change. I initiated change within myself. Here it comes. Here it is - the outer manifesting the mirrored reflection of the already adjusted inner states.

When I think too much about what is happening in the outer world - my actions are inevitably reactions. Listening unconditionally to the felt-aspect of what is unfolding is enough. Through this I receive all I require. This is enough.

When I interact with what is happening to me right now by honoring the felt-aspect of the experiences appearing dissonant - and even those appearing ecstatic - my actions are responsive.

This felt-participation - and my conscious containment of it - is alchemy, and it is also intimacy.

The key to intimacy with and within myself is 'a listening-based felt-resonance'. It is the receiving of my unfolding experiences through unconditional felt-perception.

On a level of felt-perception, 'listening and receiving are the same thing'.

With this key realization in my heart I am qualified to move from the exploration of 'intimacy within myself' into the next phase of my journey:

Intimacy with my immediate family.

Onward, inward, and upward then... Posted by Michael... at 1:44 AM

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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

I FEEL YOU My mental approach to spirituality has been fun - extremely nourishing - and very entertaining. However, I discovered that approaching spirituality primarily mentally, is wrought with pitfalls. [This is why many mental body teachers love to stand themselves up in front of pull-pits.]

It took me a long time to figure out that mental aspect of our journey is to be continually integrated consistently moved through - and embraced as 'a bridge' empowering us to move along The Pathway Of Awareness from the physically manifest and into the emotional.

If we cherish 'understanding' above all else, and so place our mental body upon our altar as The Holy Grail, we may experience regular doses of frustration and disappointment - the same sort of frustration one would experience when attempting to vacuum our home with a spurting hose pipe.

For example, we are told, 'We ought to love everyone'. Why? Because everyone is a divine expression of the one creator - or some reasoning like this. This definitely sounds groovy, and undoubtedly all with heart naturally seek to love everyone.

We are also told, 'We are one', and so ought live in oneness with everyone.

The pitfall here is the mental body cannot, of its own a-chord, grasp these two revelations through its addiction to 'understanding' or 'anal-I-sing' the words that make up the sentences that transmit the vibration of each revelation.

The mental body cannot feel revelation, therefore it cannot hear it, and therefore is unable to listen and fully receive it. This inadequacy leads to overcompensating through 'control' - to the instillation of important rules, complex formulae, detailed logically-driven concepts, and prioritized lists, etc, by which it attempts to demonstrate its 'understandings' of what it thinks is being revealed.

To the mental body, the above two statements often translate as follows:

1. Loving everyone means treating everyone the same. Or, when perceiving this from a deeper, causal perspective: Loving everyone means we ought feel the same about everyone.

Accordingly, when we approach spirituality mentally, to accomplish what we assume these revelations mean, we design a persona who 'appears as being spiritually enlightened': One who loves everybody, is kind to everyone, is nice to people, resides in a constant state of 'bliss', and so on. This pretence is so exhausting we have to take retreats to keep it all together! 36

The mental body has unlimited guidelines, moral codes, and an entire index of behavioral traits to choose from in manufacturing this 'spiritual appearance'. The behavioral traits we choose are determined by our adult definition of what love is - and invariably - when we attempt to practically apply this with any level of consistency - we are then sabotaged by our childhood definition of what love is.

Yup, attempting to behave in a heavenly manner according to the mental body parameters of what this means is guaranteed to bring out the hell in us all.

2. Then, there is statement number two - that 'we are one'. To the mental body, the notion of 'oneness' means, we all ought to believe in the same thing, like the same things, do the same things, wear the same things, and eat the same things. Like good little spiritual soldiers.

Life to the mental body is 'a fashion' in which even being deliberately unfashionable spurns its own fashion. When our spirituality is mentally-driven, we consciously and unconsciously model our mentally-manufactured spiritual appearances according to a how we believe our 'oneness-mentality' is meant to be outwardly dressed up and fed to others.

This is all fun and games as we first explore it. We also take it very seriously too - as we ought to while immersing ourselves in the intriguing adventure. We wear sacred objects, white clothing with Mandarin collars, eat vegetarian food, attend meditation classes, raise money to save the Rain Forest, watch movies off the spiritual film circuit, and read everything by Deepak & Dyer. The mental body offers us an unending banquet of titillating treats and retreats.

Yet, we invariably arrive at the realization that despite all our mental gymnastics - there are still aspects of our development which remain stagnant.

We know this to be true, when after years of metaphysical manipulation, we still cannot sit in peace around the dinner table at a family gathering. Despite our mentally-manufactured spiritual exterior, our family experience is still not in one peace.

One of my biggest and most profoundly awakening [and jarring] insights is: That all metaphysics from Reiki to Ascension procedures to light, sound, and color therapies - all of it - is for mental body activation, exploration, and integration. It is all mental - and if we focus too much on it, we too become mental.

I realized that, in any moment, each 'mental understanding' I receive is to be moved through, not camped around. Like a fuel cell of a space-ward rocket - each conceptualized insight is to be felt to its fullest, at which point it is automatically ejected. When this level of ongoing integration and

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disintegration is allowed, I am continually moved beyond 'my initial mental understanding' into a feltfaith I call 'knowing'.

A knowing to me is a felt-resonance requiring no reason or explanation in order to be acted upon.

I also now know that when I camp around my mental understandings and treat them as destination points, I fast become dulled, stuck, and consequently the trajectory of my overall frequency lowers.

I share all these insights about mental activity with you now because they are useful in jettisoning us into the next level of our intimacy exploration: The family arena. The mental body does not like to go there - to deal with family stuff - and it therefore has lists of justifications as to 'why we can be spiritual, and still reject aspects of the work which surround our relationships with our birth family'.

When ignored, this aspect of the intimacy work leads into us camping for long periods on the outer edges of where we feel we ought to be within our lives.

Consequently, we attempt to 'save the world', yet, we despise our birth mother. We attempt to listen to God, yet, we refuse to hear the words of our birth father. We attempt to bring an awareness of peace onto our planet, yet, we fail to accept our brother exactly as he is. We attempt to heal the heart, but when our sister talks to us, we become indignant.

What the family intimacy work reveals to us experientially - more efficiently than anything else - is that, 'loving everyone does not mean we ought feel the same about everyone', nor does 'living in oneness entail betraying ourselves to try and fit in, or expecting others to fit in by insisting they behave just like us'. Living according to such mentally-manufactured assumptions drive us mental with frustration. Our birth family is the cross we bear.

During forthcoming entries here on NAKED, this above statement becomes a revelation transforming our awareness about The Crucifixion, and what Jesus and Mary Magdalene are actually up to. Intending integration of our family emotional imprint invites personal crucifixion - and just as significantly - it initiates conscious resurrection. [Or, as some of us like to call it, 'Getting our sexy back!']

It is useful as we approach this profound family-related intimacy work, that we are open to a dismantling of our spiritual-mentality around what we think of as loving and oneness behavior. No amount of mental anal-I-sing assists us in integrating this family stuff! Therapy in this context is a complete distraction. It is, to borrow Adya's terminology, "a spiritual cul-de-sac".

What may be useful to you at this entry point into the family intimacy work is a teaching come to me through my cats: 38

I now take care of four house cats and three backyard strays. They are all completely different. I love them all dearly. However, this does not mean I feel the same about them all. I also intend them to live amidst each other 'as one family'. However, this does not mean I require the same behavior out of them all.

These cats have individual names, colors, and idiosyncrasies - and initially it was through these physicalized mediums that I interacted with and identified them. However, one day I realized that each cat triggered within my heart a slightly different felt-resonance. I realized that when I, through feltperception, became aware of this resonance, I automatically said to them, "I love you." I felt this love even before it became words.

Consequently, as an exercise, whenever I encountered them, I consciously began seeking out their associated felt-resonance. I noticed how each one is slightly different. Yet, each just as beautiful. Same, but different. Same difference.

I also noticed that some of them had behavioral traits which, at times, annoyed me. Especially the strays. I again used felt-perception to energetically trace these annoyances into my own heart. By continually applying this practice of felt-perception, I realized that right within my heart - side by side with their individually beautiful felt-resonance - also nestles this felt-dissonance.

It is all, always, felt inside me.

The love and the imprinting - side by side - part of the same inner, felt-reality.

When around the cats I now choose to honor both these inner feelings, to perceive both as valid, and to allow myself to feel both exactly as they arise. However, when consciously identifying with each cat - I choose to consciously interact with the felt-essence of their individual loving presence that causes me to feel, and sometimes say, "I love you".

Whenever I now encounter them, I observe this loving feeling within my heart related to the feltresonance I pick up when I look at them. I listen intently to this felt-resonance as I stroke them. I have already noticed, that through this shift in the placement of my attention, this beautifully individualized felt-aspect they radiate is fed and increases in presence. I have also noticed an increased unity and harmony flowing throughout the entire cat clan.

This beautifully, individually manifest, personal felt-expression of their vibrational actuality is obviously what they all have in common - even though it radiates uniquely from with each - and consequently, is felt like different chords of a tune within me. A-chord-ingly, conscious acknowledgment of this feltresonance by me appears to unify the clan without any outer enforcement. [It also helps to de-worm

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and de-flea them.]

Through this revelation - through interacting with them consciously as unique felt-resonances - the cats around me are gradually transforming into vibrational beings whose individually manifest feltresonances are becoming as familiar to me as the different names by which I address their physical manifestations.

I don't have to feel the same about each of them to love them all unconditionally. Nor do they have to behave the same way around me, or toward each other, to facilitate harmony within the clan.

Why bring this all up? Well, have you noticed how catty families can be? Some are 'in', while others behave like strays.

Believing we have to feel the same about all our family - and that they should behave in a certain way - and that we are supposed to behave in a certain way when around them - only leads to cattastrophe.

Fortunately, there is a more inspired approach to integrating family-related issues. Posted by Michael... at 11:09 PM

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Monday, March 30, 2009

SOME STEPPING STONES

The importance of first exploring intimacy within oneself, before consciously approaching integration of the family imprint, cannot be overstated. This is because certain realizations require integration in order not to cause any unnecessary hurt and confusion around the family table.

The first realization requiring experiential integration is:

1. Whenever we are emotionally triggered by another, or because of an unfolding circumstance, we are experiencing the surfacing of a memory.

The surfacing memory seldom has anything to do with the physical circumstance or person reflecting it. They, like a mirror, are the outer surface upon which an external projection of an inner energetic imprint is being played out. Physically tampering with the outer manifestation of such a memory – by attempting to rearrange physical circumstances through sedation or control - is in-effect-you-all. In the short term it may feel good – may appear effective - but the unfolding of time inevitably reveals nothing real and hence lasting is accomplished.

Also, tampering with any thought form triggered by this surfacing memory is equally in-effect-you-all. At some point, we discover that „changing the way we think about something‟ does not „change the way we feel about it‟ if we have not simultaneously impacted that thought-form causally through unconditional felt-perception.

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When we do not transform the way we feel about something – nothing actual changes. The surfacing memory related to any emotionally-triggering event in its purest, primal form, is „the feltaspect‟ of the triggering experience.

We are upset be/cause we feel upset.

While we are learning how to recognize and integrate these surfacing memories, naming the uncomfortable felt-aspect of our upsetting experience may be useful. However, it is not through mental labeling, but through ‘feeling this memory unconditionally’, that authentic integration of an imprinted emotional signature is accomplished.

This automatically and seamlessly leads us into our next required realization:

2. The causal point of the surfacing memory that is upsetting us is accessed and integrated by impacting the imprinted condition within our emotional body through unconditional felt-perception.

This cannot be overstated.

Once achieving these above two realizations experientially, we become less and less inclined to meddle with others or outer circumstances when triggered in a manner that causes us feltdiscomfort.

We instead reflect upon them as being akin to a holographic mirror.

We also become less and less inclined to mentally anal eyes what is occurring within our field of experience. We real eyes that, ‘a story is just a story’ - no matter how interesting or dramatic - no matter if it even stands up in court - it is still a mental explanation of a primal, energetic, felt-predicament.

Consequently, when upset - we choose to consciously place our attention upon the felt-aspect of our triggering experience and to contain it unconditionally.

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Being prepared to feel our own fear, anger, and grief – and to journey inward upon their spiraling currents - beyond the place of having to name anything – into purely being unconditionally with these resonances through felt-perception – is what establishes authentic intimacy with and within ourselves.

Because the emotional realm is one perceptual shift away from our authentic vibrational essence on the tuning dial of our human experience – by consciously feeling our emotional content, we become ever closer to ourselves.

This increasing closeness to our vibrational resonance is profoundly intimate. It gradually brings about the vibrancy of authenticity and integrity.

The more intimate we become with and within ourselves, the more we real eyes that the most wonderful contribution we may make to another‟s experience is to take responsibility for the causality of our own. Once we experientially real eyes the above perceptual stepping stones – we are ready to enter another dimension of our emotional heart-work: Integrating the uncomfortable felt-experiences as reflected to us by our birth family.

If we enter this terrain of our heart-work without having to some extent experientially visited the above realizations, we invariably cause unnecessary chaos within our family.

If we skip over this part of our heart work, we then unconsciously 'take it out' on our companion. We turn our lover into our mother or father or brother or sister, or into a kaleidoscope containing them all.

By entering the family work consciously, we open our hearts to a more conscious and rewarding experience with our lover. Posted by Michael... at 1:00 PM

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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part I – Crucifying Ourselves

The cross may have been franchised out by Christianity – but as a metaphoric symbol – it belongs to all of humanity regardless of race, religion, and gender.

When we discover the structural mechanics responsible for the manufacture of our human experience, we simultaneously real eyes what the symbol of the cross communicates.

It is a multi-dimensional portal through which we die to pretence and awaken to presence. It is the symbolic meeting point of time [the horizontal] and space [the vertical] in the heart center.

It is the 2012 gateway being consciously opened [again] by all who practice authentic alchemy.

Fulfilling the intent of the cross is the promise of intimacy.

It is held up for our facilitation by the trinity of authenticity, integrity, and intimacy.

We pass through into the resonance of authenticity when we turn inward upon our own personal daily occurrences of fear, anger, and grief, and shine the divine resonance of our beingness upon these emotional imprints with unconditional compassion.

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We then pass through into the resonance of integrity when we turn inward upon the reflections of fear, anger, and grief we unconsciously cast upon our birth family, and choose to consciously integrate these in the same manner – through unconditional felt-perception.

These first two levels of heart-work introduce us to practices of intimate inner work which in turn equip us with the capacity to look intimately into the eyes of our lover and experientially real eyes what God is for us. But first – becoming authentic…

When we intend initiating authenticity, we discover that the causal point of the quality of our experience is being dictated by the imprinted condition within our emotional body.

We vibrate, therefore we feel these vibrations, therefore we think about them, and therefore we do stuff. What we feel about these vibrations determines what we think about and how we subsequently „do‟ as a consequence of this thinking.

Taking responsibility for our experience therefore means taking responsibility for what is unfolding within the feeling realm as programmed imprinting.

Through an active intent to integrate these imprints, we real eyes our experience is masterfully constructed of four attributes: The vibrational, mental, emotional, and physical – and that each have function and divine purpose. Like a car – driving requires becoming familiar with all the controls, and with how each is designed to relate to each other with the intent to manifest movement.

We too reside in a car of sorts: However, to most of us, the human vehicle is at present an unidentified flying object.

Alchemy is the art of flying through portals. Intimacy provides the required momentum.

It is only when we approach the vibrational, emotional, mental, and physical through our heart that we are able to bring our experience into the balance required for deliberate movement.

To accomplish this, we use the physical as a divine mirror, the mental as a divine messaging system, the emotional as the altar of integration, and the vibrational as the overall facilitator.

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Once this alignment is made, each attribute then takes on its highest potential function: The vibrational is a guidance system, the emotional is the fuel system, the mental is the navigational system, and the physical is „a vehicle‟.

We have then accomplished the perceptual shift from victim to victor to vehicle.

We have moved from complaint through competition and into compassion.

Without the vehicle we cannot travel through these perceptual portals. When in balance and ready for movement, the vibrational is symbolized as „beingness above us‟, the mental as „beingness on our right-hand-side‟, the emotional as „beingness on our left-hand-side‟, and the physical as „beingness below us‟.

When these four attributes become consciously hinged through our heart, the shape of a cross is automatically manifest as an energy system in which we consciously reside.

The Celtic Cross as used as an appropriate accompanying images because the woven symmetrical designs upon it represent an integrated energetic relationship between all four attributes.

The cross mirrors our human body and contains within its symbolism our evolutionary intent. When we intend to integrate our generational imprinting - our „family issues‟ - we are consciously approaching our crucifixion.

We approach our crucifixion by consciously retracing our steps along The Pathway of Awareness. We first try to adjust our experience physically – fearfully - because the world „matters‟ so much to us. We manipulate. We fail. We then try to adjust our experience mentally – angrily - through understanding and argument. We manipulate. We fail.

Finally, through grief we enter fully the authentic condition of our imprinted emotional body and real eyes we have discovered the causal point of the quality of our experience: Our broken heart. We try everything to „fix our heart‟. We even try to get rid of what we really feel by attempting to feel better. 46

We discover that nothing we do with our hands helps. All our doings fail. Trying to feel better does not assist us to get better at feeling. Accordingly, our busy hands become useless to us – and so are metaphorically nailed down. We discover that, „Wherever we go [run], there we are‟. We real eyes we have to face ourselves wherever we stand, sit, or lay our heads. Each moment is the same when we run across this earth is search for what we carry within our own hearts. When we behave like this we reside in The Boredom.

Accordingly, our legs no longer serve us and our feet become metaphorically nailed down.

We try to think, scheme, plan, and mentally manipulate our way through our suffering. We fail. A crown of thorns is finally place upon our head – our „bloody thinking‟.

The more we struggle, the more pain we inflict within and without.

We sob.

Blessed are those who intimately sob within the embrace of their own sacred company, for they shall be comforted by experientially awakening into the vibrational. Eventually, „being with what is without condition‟ is all we have left.

In this moment of 'nothing to be done' we are crucified.

We discover it takes three full days of being without condition focused compassionately upon the causal point of any primal, generational, imprinting, for us to completely integrate the illusion, and so to rise up from the death of the perceptual actuality our imprint has been masking. Because we are so resistant – we sometimes stretch these three days out over months and even years. For most of us, facing up to three days of „what is‟ can take lifetimes. We remain crucified until experientially realizing „the radiance of being‟ as causal to all life.

There is no greater cultivator of intimacy with and within oneself than crucifixion.

Crucifixion is the portal from doingness into beingness.

Once we are crucified, our life journey becomes a living cross upon which many others die to their

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illusions. It is necessary to have been through a few crucifixions before consciously entering „the family work‟. Posted by Michael... at 1:03 PM

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part II – Mother Dear

Integrating imprinting related to our birth mother harmonizes the way we relate to our material experience. Our mother is „what matters‟. She is the entire natural world. She is nature. Nature nurtures. This entire spectrum of our relationship within our material experience is encapsulated in our current relationship with our birth mother.

How we feel about our mother right now is an authentic reflection of how we really feel about being on planet earth right now.

Integrating all imprinting related to our birth mother requires the willingness to awaken our inner mother by in a sense 'becoming our own mother‟. To accomplish this requires learning how to nurture ourselves.

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Nature teaches nurturing.

To accomplish this at a causal level, we place our attention internally upon the image of our birth mother [whether she is still in this world or not] or whomever is playing this role for us right now. Whatever story arises is to be dismissed. Whatever felt-experience arises is to be „felt without condition‟. It is this simple and this challenging.

Being with the feelings which arise when we bring an image of our mother into our awareness is the causal point for birthing the responsive activity which sows all movement leading into authentic selfnurturing.

When we place our attention upon an image of our mother and experience feelings which cause us discomfort – it is because we have not yet mastered the art of nurturing ourselves while journeying through the physical world. It also means our relationship with nature is out of balance. On some level, we still expect others to play the mothering role for us [especially our lover]. We still seek s/mothering by another.

Our task is therefore to consciously and compassionately integrate all uncomfortable emotional signatures related to our birth mother – and all humans currently cast in „a mothering role‟ toward us.

When we are authentically able to nurture ourselves, our relationship with our mother enters harmony.

Our birth mother then becomes our friend, and is released from having to play such a role for us. So are all others currently cast in this role.

We are then able to 'be' in this material world knowing that while here, all of nature is our mother. This earth is our true mother. She provides the entire physical nurturing pantry we require for our individual and collective evolution. She gives freely – our manipulative behavior hurts and is not required.

Our mother loves us. Posted by Michael... at 1:17 PM

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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part III – Oh brother!

Integrating imprinting related to our birth brother/s [and if we do not have one – anyone currently playing this role for us] integrates all issues regarding how we relate to our mental attribute. Our current relationship with our brother reveals „our mentality‟. Our brother symbolizes „the teachings of our life experience‟. He represents, „the acceptance of our moment-to-moment experience as being our highest teaching‟. Integrating all imprinting related to our brother requires „embracing our life experience as being our Truth, our Light, and our Way‟, through which we attain vibrational awareness while evolving in the material realm.

To accomplish integration of our brotherly imprint requires a conscious intent to embrace our life experience as valid and to recognize that our life lessons are delivered to us through the consequences of any movement we initiate.

To accomplish brotherly integration, we place our attention internally upon the image of our brother [whether he is still in this world or not] or whoever plays this role for us. Whatever story arises is to be dismissed. Whatever felt-experience arises is to be „felt without condition‟.

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Being with the feelings which arise when we bring an image of our brother into our awareness is the causal point birthing the responsive activity which sows the movement leading into the full embrace of our personal experience as being valid.

This is one of the primary teachings of our brother: Our life experience is deliberately tailored. Embracing it as completely valid, just as it is right now, is the only means for us to accomplish conscious approach, entry, and transition through the 2012 portal.

When we place our attention upon the image of our brother and experience feelings which cause us discomfort – it is because we have not yet accepted our life experience to be our ultimate truth. It means, on some level, we still expect others to lead us, or show us the way. We still seek to be „a follower‟. Our task is to integrate these emotional signatures so we real eyes that following our own footprints is the long and winding road which leads us.

When we are authentically able to trust our life experience, to value it above the experiences revealed to us by all others, our relationship with our brother enters harmony. This is because, when we accept our experience to be holy truth for us, we automatically discontinue invalidating our brother‟s experience.

Peace.

Our brother then becomes our friend and is released from having to play this antagonistically reflective role for us. Then, peace is felt and we are able to be in our life experience knowing that while here, all of it is our holy teaching.

Realizing the holy teaching inherent within the consequences of all our actions is the gift from our brother. Our brother says, “Your life experience as it is right now contains all the lessons you require.” Posted by Michael... at 1:22 PM

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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part IV – Sister Of Mercy.

Integrating imprinting related to our birth sister/s resolves all issues relating to personal healing - to consciously taking responsibility for the causal point of the quality of our human experience.

Sister heals and in this healing reveals all stickiness inhibiting movement. Our sister is „energy-in-motion‟ - emotion. She is the entire emotional world. She is the ocean of our planet. The entire spectrum of our relationship with our emotional experience is encapsulated within our relationship with our birth sister [or any who currently are cast in this role for us]. Integrating all imprinting related to our sister requires „becoming our own healer‟. To accomplish this requires reawakening felt-perception so we are able to consciously attend to our childhood imprinting.

To accomplish this, we place our attention internally upon the image of our sister [whether she is still in this world or not] or upon the image of whoever plays this role for us now. Whatever story arises is to be dismissed. Whatever felt-experience arises is to be „felt without condition‟.

Being with the feelings which arise when we bring an image of our sister into our awareness is the causal point birthing the responsive activity which sows all movement leading into authentic selfhealing. 52

When we place our attention upon our sister and experience feelings which cause us discomfort – it is because we have not yet mastered the art of taking responsibility for our emotional condition. We are still playing 'a victim' or 'a victor'. On some level, we still expect others to heal us on our behalf. We still seek to be „fixed‟ by another. Our task is to integrate these emotional signatures.

When we are authentically able to take on the responsibility to heal ourselves, our relationship with our sister enters harmony. Joy return into our experience.

Our sister then becomes our friend and is released from having to play such a role for us. We are then able to „be‟ in this world emotionally, knowing that while here, we are entirely responsible for our own emotional content.

Our emotional body is our inner sister. She provides all the opportunities we require for healing and for initiating real movement within our life experience. Posted by Michael... at 1:28 PM

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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part V – Our Father Who Art.

Integrating imprinting related to our birth father [or anyone currently cast in this role for us] integrates all issues relating to our inner guidance.

Our father is guidance. He is the entire „vibrational reality‟. He is vibration. Vibration – interacted with through our feltperception – is our guidance while here in the emotional, mental, and physical realm. The entire spectrum of our relationship with our vibrational experience is encapsulated within our earthly relationship with our birth father [or whomever is currently playing this role for us]. Integrating all imprinting related to our birth father requires „becoming our own source of guidance‟. To accomplish this requires learning through trial an error how to guide ourselves. This requires a complete acceptance of our insights as being valid. This requires listening.

To accomplish this, we place our attention internally upon the image of our birth father [whether he is still in this world or not] or upon an image of whoever is currently playing this role for us. Whatever story arises is to be dismissed. Whatever felt-experience arises is to be „felt without condition‟.

Being with the emotional states which arise when we bring an image of our father into our awareness 54

is the causal point birthing the responsive activity which sows movement leading us into authentic self-guidance. When we place our attention upon our father and experience feelings which cause us discomfort – it means we have not yet mastered the art of guiding ourselves while journeying through this emotional, mental, and physical world. It means, on some level, we still expect others to play this role for us. We still seek „to be told what to do by a superior figure‟. Our task is to integrate these emotional signatures.

When we are authentically able to guide ourselves, our relationship with our father enters harmony. Our birth father then becomes our friend and is released from having to play such a role for us. We are then able to be in this world knowing that while here, all of our guidance comes from within. The vibrational is our real father – it provides all we require to guide us through the intricacies of our evolution. Posted by Michael... at 1:34 PM

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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

INTEGRATING OUR FAMILY TREE – Part VI – Resurrection.

Once we have integrated the family tree by being crucified upon the primal cross of our elemental attributes – by allowing ourselves to consciously, through beingness, die to the unintegrated feltresonances of our generational imprint – we are ready to enter the portal of awakened vibrational awareness through the gaze of a lover.

Once we embrace the task of nurturing ourselves, of acknowledging our life experience as valid, of taking responsibility for our emotional content, and of accepting our inner guidance as being our true compass, we are able to sit in peace around the dinner table with our birth family [or whoever is currently cast within these roles for us].

We then real eyes all these people are just as much our family as any other human being. They are actually our vibrational brothers and sisters, playing these roles out of love to show us outwardly where we require inner growth so we may consciously approach and move through the next portal upon our evolutionary journey. In no sacred text do we read that, „God created adults‟. We are all vibrational children of the vibrational family, and the cross symbolically represents our shared elemental family tree.

As we grow, we are nurtured by the material, taught by the mental, moved by the emotional, and 56

guided by the vibrational.

Through integrating the emotional signatures reflected back to us by our birth family [or those playing such archetypal roles for us], we real eyes experientially that we only have one father – which we all share – which may be called „the vibrational‟. We real eyes we only have one mother – which we all share – which we may call, „This earth and the natural world she graciously reveals to us‟. And, that all humans are our vibrational brothers and sisters. Our true family is all humanity. All other points of role-play identification – all our clinging to certain Souls and expecting them to „mother us‟ or „father us‟ or „brother us‟ or „sister us‟ – are simply consequences of unintegrated emotional imprinting passed along from one generation to another.

Through allowing ourselves to feel the felt-aspect of these familial emotional imprints without condition – so they may organically move toward the fullness of integration – we break this spell and release all whom we are unconsciously casting into these roles. Once we have integrated the family tree – the primal cross of our elemental attributes – by consciously crucifying ourselves through applying the resonance of beingness – we are ready to enter the portal of awakened vibrational awareness through the gaze of a lover. Posted by Michael... at 1:38 PM

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Tuesday, April 7, 2009

EASTER MESSAGE: Walk On Water

There is a difference between „the teachings about Jesus‟, and „the teachings of Jesus‟.

The teachings about Jesus come to us through organized religion, while the teachings of Jesus come to us directly through the intimacy of our own experience.

The teachings about Jesus are only relevant to self-proclaimed Christians, while the teachings of Jesus impact all humanity regardless of race, religion, or gender. The teachings about Jesus raise him above us as „untouchable‟, while the teachings of Jesus bring us face to face with him as equals upon the same evolutionary adventure.

The teachings about Jesus are a mental discussion and ritualistic obedience toward rules and regulations formulated from observance of his supposed physical activities.

The teachings of Jesus are discovered through personal insight - through entering ones own authentic emotional predicament upon the resonance of unconditional felt-perception.

As we now move toward and through the Easter weekend, it feels appropriate to share some insights related to „the teachings of Jesus‟ – specifically regarding the energy set in and around the crucifixion.

Judas is no betrayer – he is possibly the only person Jesus could trust to set up the event intended to ground „inner transformational alchemy‟ into the physical world so as to make this awareness available as our humanity approached this level of our evolutionary adventure. 58

The other disciples did not „fall asleep while Jesus stayed awake throughout the night' – they were overwhelmed by the intensity of the unconsciousness related to the surfacing emotional signature being triggered by this deliberately staged event. Only Jesus, because of his personal training in alchemy, had the capacity to remain conscious as these energetic circumstances unfolded. The kiss on the cheek was not „an unexpected deception‟ – it was a symbol to Jesus that „the game is on‟. The kiss is a symbolic representation of „the trigger'– or as we call it in THE PRESENCE PROCESS – „the appearance of the messenger‟. Jesus was being set up – deliberately. He had trained for years to carry out this final demonstrations of alchemy as being „the means for humanity to perceptually move itself from The Boredom and into The Kingdom‟. The arrival of Judas and the soldiers was „the upsetting event‟ – the sudden appearance of circumstances that turn everything upside down. It was the „thief in the night‟ – the sound of breaking glass in the early hours of the morning when we are sound asleep. It was the crisis revealing what Christ is. If we check into ourselves, we discover that whenever we are personally „set up‟ – the reason we do become so upset about it, is because we feel as if „we have been betrayed‟. Anyone bringing reality into our illusions is initially considered by us to be 'a betrayer'.

As Jesus stood before Pontius Pilot, he was asked the most transformational question possible: “Are you who they say you are?” Whenever we are upset – we are experiencing a triggering within our emotional imprint upon which a manufactured identity has been built. The upset is 'anything challenging the validity of our ongoing impersonation'. The upset is a circumstance which directly contradicts our pretentious portrayal, and in doing so, challenges us to see it, admit to it, and through felt-acknowledgement, to overcome it. Ask yourself: “Am I really the person people say I am? Am I really the persona I have manufactured in an attempt to sedate and control my imprinted fear, anger, and grief? Am I indeed the effect of my generational, emotional imprinting?” Accordingly, Jesus was asked: “Are you who you say you are?” Then he was told, “If you are, you may go free, if not, you must die?” Of course Jesus was not, „The King of the Jews‟. He could never admit to what he was not. If Pontius Pilot had instead asked, “Are you a vibrational being currently having an emotional, mental, and physical experience?”, he could clearly have stated “Yes” and been freed. But that was not what this

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entire setup was about. No upset ever questions our authentic essence – it is always an affront on our inauthenticity. When we react, when we defend our position – we hold fast to what we have manufactured as a consequence of our imprinting. If, when we are upset, we reactively defend our stance to the point of placing the erupting attention upon another or elsewhere [through justification or blame], we have then successfully escaped and freed ourselves of the discomfort of having to take responsibility for our experience. Jesus‟ popular identity as „King of the Jews‟ had everything to do with the collective, unresolved, Jewish imprint, and absolutely nothing to do with his actual intent. He could not admit to what he was not. Consequently, Pontius Pilot had no choice but to sentence him to death.

In the same light, when we are upset, and instead of reacting, choose response through containment, we are volunteering to die to what is inauthentic about the nature of our persona within that triggered moment. We are choosing not to continue sedating and controlling the imprint now in question – but rather to be with it as it is through felt-perception until its illusionary state is integrated.

Just because Jesus was adept at this kind of work does not mean that he experienced no fear in the moment he was sentenced to death by Pontius. Fear was everywhere in that experience. However, he did not try to escape it by explaining „what a terrible mistake this has all been‟. He did not justify or debate or blame. He felt the fear. He contained the fear. He required the fear. His quiet, nondefensiveness, was a deliberate response to this primal fear – the fear of „physical death‟. When we are upset – our immediate impulse toward reactivity is born of not being able to contain the fear. After the betrayal of the messenger, fear always comes first: The fear of „now having our manufactured projection called out and revealed‟ - the fear of having to die to what is inauthentic about ourselves. After being sentenced to death, Jesus then entered „the walk of shame‟. As he made his way through the angry crowds toward the crucifixion, many shouted, mocked, scorned, threw rotting matter, beat at him, and tried their best to shame him.

When we do not defend our manufactured identity, we are shamed because of it. People then say and do terrible things to us because, when we do not defensively maintain our projected persona, others mistakenly assume it is because we are actually siding with it – and so we are judged accordingly. This can mean great shame, harsh words, and reprisals. Any defensive stance we resort to when „upset‟ is an attempt to prevent this eruption of this shame.

When others accordingly shame us, we feel angered, enraged, and infuriated. This angered state is

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then often the point at which we do become reactive, and not only defend our projected persona, but in turn attack those who are participating in revealing and shaming our false projections.

Just because Jesus spent years in training for this moment does not mean he did not feel the anger, rage, and venom. Despite what the „teachings about Jesus‟ lead us to assume – Jesus was human while human. As he walked with his cross, all around him, within and without, rage spilled over and became torrents of abusive violence. He felt it. Yet, he did not defend himself, nor did he try to take the attention off himself by attacking his attackers. He contained all the surfacing anger. He required the anger. His walk of shame was a deliberate intent to gather this primal anger – the anger which always arises in defense of our egoic manifestations. The people were furious that he would not be „the King of the Jews‟ for them. The people were enraged that he would not disempower them of their personal responsibility by giving them someone to follow.

When he arrived at his place of reckoning, there were many already waiting there who loved him dearly, but who did not have the capacity to comprehend what had been set in motion. He saw and felt the bewilderment upon their faces. He could not tell them, “Do not worry – this is required”. As the crucifixion ritual unfolded, the grief swam within him and around him so thickly that many felt as if they were drowning in it. Yet, he did not try to stop anyone from experiencing what they were experiencing. He did not try to comfort them. Instead, he consciously felt all this grief. He required feeling this primal grief – the grief that comes from the false belief that we can actually lose something we love.

It took Jesus three hours of conscious containment of the fear, anger, and grief he had gathered since Judas‟ profound setup to accomplish integration. He had to die to all of it. In the midst of the death, he asked the same question we all ask as we are approaching integration of any primal imprint – “Father, why have you forsaken me?” Jesus too had to surrender – to become so vulnerable that he even questioned his own divine connection with the vibrational – before making the perceptual shift from The Boredom into The Kingdom.

The teachings about Jesus lead us to believe he did all this so we do not have to.

The teachings of Jesus reveal that he was deliberately anchoring within the physicality of the human experience a metaphoric demonstration of what everyone who intends awakening into vibrational consciousness has to move through.

When we follow this alchemical demonstration, when we become intimate with our own emotional imprinting [fearfully and callously called „sin‟ by the religious], when we contain it as it is brought into our attention through our obedient Judas‟s, we too are able to tread the long and winding road which leads us into vibrational awareness.

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Anyone who attempts to convince us that because Jesus did it - and if we then accept he did it for us that we then do not have to engage in any such inner activity, rob us of our salvation.

Jesus placed the revelation of this energetic Pathway of Awareness into this world 2000 years ago for us today. The story of the crucifixion is a demonstration of the conscious movement from „the upset‟, through the fear, then anger, then grief, into the resurrection from the imprint.

Our world is currently being set up. All that is inauthentic - every structure we have built and every action we have taken as a reaction to our individual and collective emotional imprinting - now approaches reckoning. Every „catastrophe‟, be it environmental or economic, is asking us, “Are you who they say you are?”

2012 is the crucifixion of humanity. Once passing through this portal, we become vulnerable to a transformed way called 'being' – one in which our vibrational essence is consciously honored as causal. Much has to die between here and there. Within this year alone we are still to experience some major planetary crucifixions. This is because we now approach the Easter of our human evolutionary experience. I have often written and said, “THE PRESENCE PROCESS is not what we think it is about.” As we move through the next three years, many of us [including myself] shall repeatedly real eyes the relevance of this statement.

This intimate heart-work is not about having us live happily ever after within the identities and structures manufactured out of our emotional signatures. This intimate heart-work is about training us experientially to not only consciously contain these erupting signatures within ourselves, but to remain grounded as millions literally go mad with fear, anger, and grief.

Every deliberately initiated crucifixion has profound consequence.

This Easter weekend we are again reminded that this work is nothing new. It is not even religious. Our moment of evolutionary harvest has arrived. There is nowhere to run to and nothing to do. Pontius Pilot is everywhere. Death sentences are being handed out like parking tickets. Angry crowds are gathering to blame and shame. Those we love stand around not comprehending what is happening. Can we consciously die to all of this – or are we going to fight tooth and nail to defend it?

Being with what is without condition on the level of felt-perception contains within it the same radiance as expressed through Jesus during his crucifixion - the same resonance that carried him through that final moment of doubt into the dissolving of the perceptual veil concealing The Kingdom from its children.

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We are blessed who real eyes this.

Realizing this, and responding accordingly, sets up our life experiences to become islands of salvation in amidst the stormiest seas yet witnessed by humanity.

When, through containment, we are able to walk through the current emotional chaos unfolding upon planet earth without drowning unconsciously in it – then we are 'walking on water'. My prayer for myself and for you all this Easter is this: „Walk on water‟. No matter what happens, walk on water. This planet requires our conscious presence now more than ever. Be ever conscious of the Pontius. “Are you really who they say you are?” Posted by Michael... at 11:45 PM

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Saturday, April 11, 2009

EXPERIENCE NOT PERSON When we catch ourselves asking, "How do I find the right person to explore intimacy with?", or something to that effect - we are both seeking in the wrong place and in the wrong way. 'Looking for' is getting behavior. Intimacy is only possible within a resonance of giving and receiving. A companion to consciously explore intimacy with is always given when we are ready to receive. When we 'look for someone', we merely seek out a reflection of our imprinted, unconscious definition of love in another. Then, at some point, we inevitably try and change that person because what initially attracted us [the passion!] becomes the same thing that we run from [the poison!] when what we wanted is not possessed. The most efficient approach is to become curious about the experience of intimacy itself. What does it feel like to be truly intimate with a lover? Forget conjuring up the identity of a lover. Rather ask to be given the experience of intimacy. Become fascinated with intimacy itself - not with another person. Once our fascination is authentic - the experience is unexpectedly, magically, and powerfully given! When we catch ourselves 'looking for someone' - good time to visit the mirror. Posted by Michael... at 4:18 AM

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Monday, April 13, 2009

RESONACE OF AN ENCOUNTER

How do we recognize a partner with which to consciously explore intimacy?

First of all, any companion we are journeying alongside right now, whether through marriage or otherwise, is our current intimacy partner. We do not have to „get rid of the person we are with right now‟ to explore intimacy. The exploration of intimacy is multi-dimensional and has many layers of entry and application.

For many of us, our current companion may not be involved in heart-work at all. They may not even use the word „intimacy‟ as part of their vocabulary. They may be happy with „things just they way they are‟. They may never read more than one page of a book like THE PRESENCE PROCESS, and then put it down never to pick it up again. The may seemingly have no interest. When we awaken intent to explore intimacy, but are in this predicament – then this is 'our cross to bear'. It means we are not yet ready to receive a consciously-orientated intimacy partner. It means we still have some personal and family imprinting to integrate. It means part of us is apparently as unconscious about the necessity for an exploration into intimacy as is communicated by the feltreflection of our current companion .

When with a partner not vulnerable to exploring intimacy consciously, we are still able to explore intimacy ourselves - just not „with‟ our companion yet – but rather „in the company of our own

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companionship‟. This is what THE PRESENCE PROCESS and ALCHEMY OF THE HEART assist us to accomplish.

Where we are right now in our heart-work is where we are now required to be. To wish it to be some other way is to miss the point and unconsciously initiate energies of manipulation.

People who are ripe for such an encounter are often those who have been on a solitary journey for a while.

Celibacy is a very good resonance to entertain before entering a conscious intimacy exploration with another. When we are continually sexually involved we are not vulnerable to an accurate awareness of what constitutes „the condition of our personal energy environment‟. Regular sexual encounters immerse us deeply into the energetic environments of another.

A solitary experience means that rather than looking outwardly for another - we have been seeking inwardly - we have instead been focusing on guiding, healing, teaching and nurturing ourselves.

A solitary experience means we have for a while deliberately not been leaning on another, and so we have become aware of just how and where we do lean. We have processed the emotional charges driving our leaning behaviors.

A solitary experience means the mirror and family dinner table have been our intimacy companions.

We may be married, or in a long-term relationship, but still have entered such a solitary resonance. This is the consequence of many marriages and very long-term relationships programs.

Then, one day we real eyes we have arrived at a place on the road where it is now beneficial to journey intimately with another. We have become our best friends. We have processed much of our neediness and incessant wanting, and so know we have something to give. We seek an intimate encounter in which we may give, give, give it all away. We become curious about the experience of intimacy. We ask sincerely, “What is this intimacy thing about? I would like to explore intimacy as an experience. ” When we have been journeying in a solitary manner for a while – without any companion – and feel ready to explore this next level of the intimacy experience consciously with another – there are signs which are useful in identifying when such a potential companion enters our space:

We are not passionately drawn to this person. This is because they are not reflecting the feltresonance of our unintegrated emotional charge. When we meet another who „knocks us off our feet‟,

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we can be sure this is NOT our intimacy partner. To our inner child, this is simply a very good reflection of 'mommy' or 'daddy'. Such „head over heals‟ encounters are driven by the emotional realm, not the vibrational. Those seeking „the rush of falling in love‟ are not yet emotionally equipped enough for such an exploration. These passionate encounters usually drown when called upon by the depths of intimacy.

We almost feel a sense of indifference when we encounter someone ready to journey with us. It is not actually „indifference‟ we are feeling – it is „lack of manipulation‟. We notice they are equally indifferent to our presence.

Being able to rest in their company is evidence of great possibility. When with a potential intimacy partner, there is a distinct resonance of stillness and emptiness in which we feel relaxed enough to rest. We are able to rest because we are at peace with this person. There is no push and pull because there is no need and want related to their presence. It is the kind of encounter in which we feel uncertain we shall meet again. We have no sense of „a future together‟. They just happen to be here in this moment with us. Our full awareness is present with them in this moment. The events of this moment are enough - they are not 'driving us to make plans to put together another moment while we are still in this one'.

There is no personal preparation required before entering their company. We have no desire to impress [manipulate] this person – we want nothing from them. This encounter will also appear to be in some way „arranged‟. When we are paying attention, it will be quite obvious the universe is placing us before them and them before us. It is obvious that 'there is something at play'. Playfulness is a sign.

When we experience an encounter that resonates with some of the above indicators, it means the universe is presenting us with a profound possibility.

Because of the amount of emotional processing already accomplished, many are now ready for such an encounter. Blessed are those who recognize it and have the courage to initiate such a great adventure into themselves with another. Posted by Michael... at 3:48 AM

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Monday, April 13, 2009

BECOME THE ANSWER I

A conscious exploration of intimacy with another is entry into an unknown frontier. Initially, there are more questions than answers – and this is why it is beneficial to hone one‟s approach to, „the questioning process‟.

To write me emails with questions about intimacy, as if I am any authority on this or any other subject, is a bit like treading water. Eventually you have to find out yourself. The only thing I am an authority on, is my experience – and just like most - I am conveniently selective at what part of it I choose to acknowledge as being true – and what part I ignore.

You must become the authority within your experience for any real movement to take place. The moment you are – you will no longer read a word I write. What would be the point, other than entertainment value?

As I write NAKED, I do so from within the insights gained through my personal exploration of intimacy as I consciously initiated and went through it with another. Yes, there is that word „through‟ again. Any authentic exploration of intimacy with another – to be and remain authentic to its intent – is short-lived. The consequences of an exploration into intimacy, however, are eternal. Nothing can ever be lost which is truly set free. But we have to set it free to „know‟ this. When I initially entered this journey, I had no idea what I was doing. I still don‟t. Sometimes I ask myself, “What was that all about?” She was here, now she‟s gone, and I am alone, again. Yet, only now, many months after we have physically parted, am I gradually integrating the immense gift of the experience we shared. What is the „she‟ that was here, and what is the „she‟ that is gone, and, what is the „she‟ that remains – unmoved, untouched, ever awesome in the way it manifests itself in time and space? Only now, having spent months integrating „not getting what I wanted‟, am I able to touch my own heart with my flat hand and say, “Thank you for visiting me again and giving me another opportunity to set you free – because every time I set you free, you reveal a little more of your majesty to me.”

The revelation of what love is arises only in the absence of manipulation. „Our lover‟ is here to assist us to gain an experiential glimpse into the face of love. But, not too much – 68

and, not all at once. Only as much as we may contain. Time during and after the experience of exploring intimacy consciously with another must be allotted to solitary digestion – or else the nutrition is not received. The experience is the teaching.

II For a while now, I have trusted my life experience enough to write directly from within it as my point of reference. I trust my experience enough to know that the deeper from within it I speak, the more relevance others may perceive in their own. This is because there is a divine paradox at work here:

It is only in exploring the depths of our individuality that we comprehend the vastness of our commonality. If you have any questions about „intimacy‟ – join the club. Questions are the paddle rowing us forward – as long as we do not get bogged down in the whirlpools of „the answering process‟. Our task is to honor the question – to „feel the question as deeply as possible‟ – and then to let it go and carry on being as present as possible within every aspect of our daily experience. This is an „Ask and receive‟ universe – for everyone. However, it only appears so when we are able to receive the answer directly ourselves. Receiving answers directly requires zero „figuring-out‟ activity. Zero thinking is required. Thinking is the whirlpool – and taking the thinking of others as being the solemn truth for us are rapids guaranteed to overturn any boat. If we do not know, we do not know. It is quite appropriate to „not know‟. It is healthy in fact. Thinking cannot accomplish the full, integrated resonance of knowing – only a personal integrated emotional, mental, and physical experience accomplishes the full, integrated resonance of knowing.

Understanding is not knowing.

A Soul convinced that thinking and understanding is the pathway to power and glory is a Soul disempowered. Too much understanding drives us mental. We can all understand „the concept of poverty‟ – but we can only „know poverty‟ when it unfolds as something occurring within our life experience. This is why „the politics of understanding‟ is impotent in impacting real life predicaments in any lasting way.

III Once we have let go „the question‟, we allow ourselves to receive and recognize „the answer‟ by having an integrated life experience through which the answer is communicated intimately to us. And, 69

it is only communicated when we have the capacity to contain it – not a second before – not a second afterward. Once we have had an experience containing „the answer for us‟ – then, we know. This knowing is vibrational, and what is vibrational is at its core experiential. The answer is always within. If the question arises – it does so because it is being birthed from within the answer. Both co-exist. However, for the answer to manifest experientially requires us initiating and entering an integrated emotional, mental, and physical experience to be used as a vehicle to display it. This is what the question is for – not to get a quick mental vomit from another person – but to initiate an experience in which the answer may be communicated and contained.

Writing to me, or anyone, seeking another mental understanding of what puzzles you, is selling yourself short. Don‟t do it. Rather seek revelation through personal experience. Be patient. We are not to belittle ourselves by allowing other‟s experiences to be the holders and transmitters of our personal truths. This is one of the many benefits in having this human experience: It is a means for us to develop the capacities to hold and own truth as something we actually know. Missing out on „knowing through personal experience‟ is missing out on the richness of being human.

The exploration into intimacy as explored here through NAKED transmits insights coming out of my experience. I am not asking you to have my experience. I am not declaring my experience as „the truth‟. I am, however, using the portal of my experience as an invitation for you to plunge more deeply into yours. Your experience holds your truth. If you have any questions about what is written here – if you discover you are puzzled about something – by all means ask. But please ask the right person: You. Go to the mirror and ask – with feeling – about anything you seek to „know‟. Then let go – and continue to be as present within your life experience as possible. By approaching what you seek in this way, you keep both hands on the oars and balance within the boat. The answer will, when you develop the capacity to contain it, surface within the vehicle of your ongoing life experience as a part of your life experience. Trust this unfolding to be so. This is divine law. Know this law to be true through the conduit of your personal experience and all other divine laws become as an open book.

IV The exploration into intimacy with another is not about „relationship‟ or „relationships‟. It is about „relating to‟. It is not about, “How do I relate to you?” It is about, “How do I relate to myself when I am with you?” At all points along the journey the primary relationship must be kept intact as causal – and this primary relationship is best encapsulated by the way we are being toward our own emotional content.

However I am currently being toward my emotional content is exactly how I am being toward myself.

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Seeking answers from another – being satisfied with quick mental understanding fixes – erodes our primary relationship with ourselves. When we actively lean upon another‟s wisdom as being „our sworn source of truth‟ – we dismiss our own capacity to be a vehicle for the manifestation of truth. This inner disconnectedness manifests outwardly as religion.

Your exploration into intimacy with another may not look anything like mine. Awesome. Trust your experience to be exactly what is required for you. Your experience is a rare gem that cannot be found anywhere else in creation. Never let anything corrode your trust in your experience, or else all is lost, and then schizophrenia reigns.

Never betray your own capacity to be the vehicle of truth as it reveals itself directly through your experiential circumstances. This is what it means to „be the answer‟.

V The funny thing is, the more we become the answer for ourselves – the more we speak with conviction – and the more we speak with conviction - the more we attract questions from others. This is where it may become sticky. If we deliver answers to others mentally as being ultimate truths – which we appear to do when speaking from within personal conviction gained directly from our experience - we simultaneously risk disempowering others of the capacity to gain these truths for themselves through the vehicle of their own experience. As I write – I always do so from a resonance of, „this is true for me‟. I have to – because I write directly from within the core of my personal experience. My experience is my truth, my light, and my way into conscious vibrational awareness. If you are inspired by what I write – great! But, please do not let it be validation for anything other than one human beings capacity to, within their own experience, wield the unlimited power of „the question‟.

Become intimate with your own questions. Become intimate with your own quest. No one on this earth is authority over your experience – especially not older men who wear funny clothing. You are your authority. Your life experience unfolds as „your truth‟ – the truth you require digesting to gain the capacity to consciously enter vibrational awareness while still emotionally, mentally, and physically intact. Exploring intimacy consciously is a significant step along such a journey. Own each step you take. Our most current footprints are always the pathway leading us home to the core of our heart‟s quest. When entering an unknown frontier - like „the conscious exploration of intimacy with another‟ – it is necessary we trust our experience to be the mouth of truth. Otherwise, we invariably make our

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journey into and through intimacy about „the other person‟ – and then, “Oops!” – another bout of schizophrenia.

Our unfolding experience is a valid expression of what is true for us. This is the answer. Posted by Michael... at 12:53 PM

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Thursday, April 23, 2009

AMAZING GAZING - PART I - Intent It is simple [but not necessarily easy] to initiate a conscious exploration of intimacy with another: We approach them and say, “Would you consider exploring intimacy with me, physically, mentally, and emotionally, with the intent of achieving experiential vibrational awareness through this experience?” They will either run, or say yes. Such a proposition beats, “Wanna go out to the movies?” However, for those only desiring movies, popcorn, and casual sexual encounters, a proposition of this nature can be somewhat intimidating. If another verbally agrees to enter this intent experientially with us, then, by nature of saying “Yes”, the journey is officially initiated. This is the power of intent.

As a consequence, our experience whenever with and apart from them, then deliberately unfolds in such a way that all which stands between us experiencing authentic intimacy when in their company organically begins to surface. Just as in THE PRESENCE PROCESS, whatever inhibits the experience of authentic intimacy between us whenever we are together surfaces in the guise of „upsets‟ – or „set-ups‟, as we have come to call them in this work.

And, just as THE PRESENCE PROCESS applies consciously connected breathing as the experiential tool to activate awareness of our emotional imprinting – a conscious exploration into intimacy also comes with a powerful activating tool: Gazing. Or, as we may refer to it once having experienced its profound power - „amazing gazing‟.

Just as with any modality which uses the breath as an activating tool, the practice of gazing is magnified by the intent driving it. And, just as breathing is also used as a tool to enhance other practices other than emotional cleansing, such as yoga, self-hypnosis, and deep relaxation, gazing also has various applications. It is therefore necessary to clearly establish the intent driving the practice of gazing before entering into it with another.

In the context of exploring intimacy consciously with another, the intent of gazing as a practice is: To awaken the experience of authentic intimacy within us [and within our interactions with the companion with whom we are making this journey] by revealing where we are energetically blocked to the intended experience due to our emotional imprinting. Posted by Michael... at 12:49 AM

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Thursday, April 23, 2009

AMAZING GAZING - PART II - How To Gazing is useful to us no matter what our current level of entry into the conscious exploration of intimacy: 1. We may still be on a solitary journey – have intended a conscious exploration into intimacy with another – but not yet received the gift of a companion from the universe with which to undertake such an exploration. Consequently, we may gaze with ourselves using a mirror.

2. We may have identified another as a possible intimacy companion, have approached them and verbally initiated our intent, and received a favorable reply. Consequently, we may suggest gazing to them as a practice to initiate an immediate deepening of our intimate exploration.

3. We may already be in the midst of a relationship with another in which we have both agreed to the necessity to awaken or reawaken intimacy between us. Consequently, we may use gazing as a means to kindle or rekindle the flame of intimacy within our shared experience.

Gazing as a practice is very simple, but like consciously connected breathing, do not let its simplicity lull you into applying it without due respect. The consequences are deeply impactful and so its application is recommended administered with a good dose of careful attention.

Once again, it is emphasized here that like the breathing technique in THE PRESENCE PROCESS, this practice moves according to its clearly stated intent. Some of you may have already gazed with another as a means to „clear karma‟, or to „perceive reflections of past lives‟, or any other number of its applicable intents. Like a magnifying glass, this tool exaggerates whatever its intent directs it toward. So, the label on the gazing box, just as on the consciously connected breathing box, is, „Handle With Care‟.

Gazing, like consciously connected breathing, is not a toy.

And, just like consciously connected breathing, gazing is so simple that we may be inclined to add to or adjust the practice so that our mental body is impressed enough with what we are doing to become interested in attempting it. However, like consciously connected breathing, what we are doing is „nothing‟. Less fiddling with it is therefore more. Through our gazing practice we are entering „a deliberately initiated active nothingness designed to reveal where we are resorting to mindless doings in our daily encounters with each other [or with ourselves] because we are unable to be‟.

To commence the practice, we sit comfortably facing each other [or if we have no other yet to work 74

with – then facing a mirror]. Do not be too close and do not be too far away from your companion. Experiment to ascertain what is a practical distance. The posture of our body is irrelevant other than making sure we are comfortable enough to sit without shifting for 15 minutes – and that if we are experiencing this with a companion – that our heads are at exactly at the same height. We do not want to be gazing down upon our companion, or have them gazing down upon us.

We then commence gazing into each others eyes. As a point of focus, we pick one of our companion‟s eyes, be it the left or right, and fix our gaze upon it. Or, we place our point of focus where the bridge of their nose touches their forehead. Then, there is nothing else to do. Once our attention is fixed upon our companion, we remain in this position and gaze with them for 15 minutes. After a few moments, or minutes, of commencing the practice even the physical necessity to blink becomes unnecessary.

Just like consciously connected breathing, whatever happens as a consequence of sitting together while we are sitting together, or with ourselves, is required.

For some this practice is immediately, deeply uncomfortable. This is because we are not used to looking at another in the eye for so long. Nor are we used to allowing another to gaze at us for an extended period. Accordingly, we may chuckle, giggle, look away momentarily, shift within our body, feel a flush of what we perceive as embarrassment, etc. All of these experiences are valid, unfold at one time or another, and are a natural peeling away of our energetically imprinted barriers. A very important recommendation regarding this practice is, „no speaking‟. Once we commence, and until we are completed the 15 minutes, complete silence and stillness [as best as one can manage] are the elixirs which deliver the medicine. Within the parameters of actively carrying out this practice, as it is applied to consciously activate the experience of intimacy within and between us, speaking serves no purpose – not matter how much the metal body believes it necessary. Speaking while gazing is an attempt to avoid „being'.

The longer we sit and gaze, the more we notice powerful, visual, perceptual shifts moving like weather conditions across our companions face and around their physical presence. Our companion‟s face [or ours if we are using a mirror] undergoes alteration. Although it is initially impossible to do – these movements are all to be ignored. There is no value in anal-i-sing what we are seeing, or even discussing what we saw during the practice with our companion afterward. It is fun though, and can lead to laughter. However, do not use this part of the experience as a palette upon which to try and paint „understands‟ about anything.

Whatever we see during the gazing practice is ours alone to be with on a level of felt-perception. In other words, it is not the visual distortions which are of any significance to us – it is the emotional

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states triggered within us as a consequence of perceiving them which are significant. Our task is to be with these triggered felt-aspects of the experience without condition – not to turn them into stories and mental body vomits.

Once we have moved through 15 minutes of this practice, it is recommended we remain within each other‟s company, sitting quietly for a while, now placing our attention elsewhere. DO NOT ENTER A SEXUAL ENCOUNTER AFTER GAZING! Rather have a cup of tea, take a quiet walk, or something else that does not entail any physical contact. Continue to honor the radiance of „being with each other in the silence and stillness‟ for a few moments. Again, as already stated, it is not necessary or even advisable to rush into a discussion of our personal experience of the gazing practice with each other. No matter how much importance our mental body places upon what happened while gazing our personal experience of it has zero relevance for our companion – and vice verse.

Like the breathing practice in THE PRESENCE PROCESS, whatever happens while we are gazing is required, but not that relevant. The relevance only arises once the practice is completed and we reenter our daily experiences alone and with each other. The revelation of gazing is in the subsequent consequences unfolding within our daily experience. As already stated – the primary benefit of gazing is, „the weeding out of where we are doing stuff together because we are unable to be together‟. Posted by Michael... at 1:02 AM

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Thursday, April 23, 2009

AMAZING GAZING - PART III - Being Saves Experiencing authentic intimacy with each other is not „a doing‟, although it may be experienced through all sorts of shared activities. Experiencing intimacy with each other is „a state of being‟. When most of us enter a new relationship with another, we initially enjoy „being together‟ as something that is effortless. We may float within this space of effortless being for some time. However, and because this is one of the underlying intents of all initiated relationships, by being together we invariably initiate and energetic triggering within each other of an awareness of our unintegrated emotional imprinting. For most of us, the way we cope or react to these surfacing energy patterns is „to do stuff‟. Our relationship them then gradually becomes about „the stuff we do together‟. We then confuse the „stuff we do together‟ with the experience of intimacy or „being in love‟. When we or our companion no longer want „to do that thing together that we always loved to do‟ – or, when those things „we loved to do together‟ lose their capacity to keep us glued together – we then declare that, „something is wrong or missing‟ or „that intimacy has left our relationship‟.

Yet, authentically experiencing intimacy is not attached to the presence of absence of any particular doing. On the contrary, for the most part, people who do a lot together are unconsciously reacting to an inability to simply be together. Once a state of „being intimate together‟ is authentically established, all doings become a secondary aspect of our shared encounters. Often, when the magic of beingness starts seeping out of our shared experience with each other – we resort to an increasing menu of „doings‟ in an attempt to „rekindle the flame‟. This is one of the most stupid pieces of advice handed out like a band aid by marriage-menders to relationships which are bleeding through a gaping artery: “Why don‟t you find something you both like to do, and then do that together…it will bring you closer again.” This „doing together as a reaction to an inability to be together‟ is always a movement in the wrong direction. Intimacy cannot be established by „added doings‟ – it is only initiated by „initiated beingness‟. Gazing, which is in itself a not-doing practice [an undoing], efficiently remedies this predicament. When two people truly love each other and seek to continue life‟s walk together, yet have found that they have lost their way in being intimate with each other, gazing – and the consequences it initiates – and our intent to respond to these consequences as consciously as possible - is „a savior‟. Posted by Michael... at 1:18 AM 77

Thursday, April 23, 2009

AMAZING GAZING - PART IV - The Consequences The way this practice works is that while we are gazing with each other, we are simultaneously mining energetically within ourselves. Though our companion is present, for each of us gazing is essentially „an inside job‟. We are energetically digging inwardly and uncovering the imprinted patterns revealing the emotional signatures which – because they are so uncomfortable – unconsciously drive us from „being with each other‟ into „doing with each other‟. 15 minutes gazing once a week is all that is required to unearth the causality of „our doingness when together‟. What occurs as a direct consequence of this gazing is that over the next few days after experiencing this practice we become aware of these emotional signatures. For the most part, this awareness arises like it does in THE PRESENCE PROCESS procedure, as externally triggered reflections - as „set ups‟ – as upset. This is why gazing is NOT TO BE DONE EVERY DAY. Gazing is „the inhale‟. Time out from gazing is „the exhale‟. Both are movements are required. It is important to allow time to unfold for a good exhale.

Initially, it is recommended we only gaze with each other once every seven days. This allows a full week for the unearthed emotional imprinting to arise into our awareness. Once we become more skilled at this procedure, and at responding to its consequences, we may gaze every four days. To do it more frequently than this is called, „trying to push the river‟.

Pushing the river occurs whenever we do not give enough time for the consequences of the practice to unfold to a point of resolution. Pushing the river occurs when we use this practice as „the fix itself‟ – instead of viewing it maturely as merely a catalyst to initiate experiences ripe for experiential processing. Do not push the river – it is a futile approach and only leads to confusion, frustration, and an inevitable resistance toward this perceptual tool. To commence with, gazing once a week is enough.

The setups or upsets triggered through gazing are processed in the exact manner in which we are instructed within THE PRESENCE PROCESS procedure, and also within ALCHEMY OF THE HEART.

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This is one of the reasons why „exploring intimacy consciously with another‟ is not an entry point into this heart-work. This is why we only initiate a conscious exploration of intimacy with another after first having established a semblance of intimacy with and within ourselves when we are alone – and then with and within our family when we are gathered with them. When we enter this level of exploration with another – and we apply a tool like gazing – without first having done a substantial level of personal and family-related work, we are asking for disaster. We are then sitting on a pile of bone-dry kindling and playing with fire. This is because the emotional signatures unearthed during a conscious exploration into intimacy with another are some of the most deeply unconscious and uncomfortable felt-aspects within our emotional imprinting. As arising feelings, some of them are truly horrible to behold.

Having the capacity to consciously contain a direct felt-awareness regarding certain aspects of our behavior toward others – especially as it relates to what we call „intimate relationships‟ – or the balance within the feminine/masculine principle - requires a stamina that is only gained from approaching this experience through the natural radiance of this work. In the days following gazing with our companion we experientially real eyes the extent of this truth. Even the most skilled emotional processing warriors are laid flat and unexpectedly stunned by the consequences of encountering the felt-aspects of imprinted emotional signatures related to masculine/famine imbalance upon this planet.

Once we have commenced the gazing practice with another, there are two main ways in which these mined-for emotional imprints surface into our personal awareness – and so there are two approaches to responding to them – both of which require the art of inner alchemy to initiate and accomplish resolution:

1. The first is when we are upset while being on our own. When the upset arises and we are alone – in other words, when we the upset occurs while we are not in the company of our companion - we are to process it alone. We are not to try and make contact with them as a means to include them within our drama. We are to move through the art of „being with what is‟ until we achieve resolution. Our companion cannot assist us and no amount of verbal vomiting in their direction advances integration. The mental body believes in „talking things out‟ – but it is a liar. Talking to our companion within the midst of an upset only serves to bury the emotional signature we have unearthed and to breed unnecessary confusion. Only „feeling what is unfolding within us without condition‟ resolves it – not „discussions about what we are feeling‟. Talking may enable us to temporarily feel better – but it does not move us one inch toward getting better at feeling. Therefore, we are first to process this experience to the point of completion before sharing the insights it gifts us with. We know we have accomplished resolution when what we are experiencing is „no longer about

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anybody else‟, and when the discomfort arising from the upset has completely passed and is replaced by a feeling of peacefulness, laced with deepening insight. We are integrated once we are able to laugh about it. To enter any discussion with our companion prior to this point of resolution is to fan the fires of confusion – or as we state in THE PRESENCE PROCESS – to clean the mirror in an attempt at cleansing the pimples it reflects. Once we achieve resolution – we may, if we feel inspired, share the insights gained through this triggered experience with our companion. This post-processing sharing fosters deepening intimacy.

2. The second approach is when the upset arises while we are in each others company. Again, the only approach useful when this occurs is silence, stillness, and a willingness to feel what is unfolding without attempting to cage it, kill it, or flee from it. And, be warned, some of the arising emotional signatures are so horrible, we will want to cage them, kill them, and flee from them. Sitting quietly together in silence while the triggered emotional signature spills out all over the shared experience feels exactly like dying. It feels like 'the end of the world'. Everything becomes dark and feels as if it is over. There is no future, no hope, and no seeming prospect of coming out of it. This is exactly how it is supposed to feel because what is unfolding is indeed the death of an illusionary perceptual state regarding a particular disfunction within our feminine/masculine interaction perpetuated through generation imprinting. The discomfort we feel is our experiential movement through the felt-texture of the arising emotional signature. Also, while we move through this experience, there are horrid thought patterns – stinking thinking. These are the stories that have become associated with this particular emotional signature whenever it has shown its face in any way within our previous interactions with others. The only way out is to sit together in silence, to feel what is, and to allow these feelings to move their course until they pass. When we do not enter discussion – when we do not entertain the story – and when we do not try to physically 'do something about what we are feeling' – they pass. It is our beingness with them – and not our doingness to them – which integrates them. Not only do they pass – but on the other side of the experience an enchanting space opens up which is delightfully intimate. We know we have reached this delightful space of rebirthed beingness because it feels like we have just awoken from a dream and are able to laugh about the nightmare just passed. The spontaneous laughter is a key signifier that what arose is resolved. Not only this – often we have no idea what it was we passed through! It is so gone that it is hard to talk about. All we know is that something dreadful suddenly arose – seemingly out of nowhere – triggered unintentionally and unexpectedly by one of us - and then we sat with it - together – and it was horrible -and it then moved on – and in its wake we feel closer to each other than we ever knew possible. Each time we „move through‟ these deeply primal emotional imprints together, we are forging a bond which is eternal. Reaching the spontaneous laughter is evidence we are touching upon the vibrational. This is because spontaneous laughter is always the first indicator we are accessing vibrational awareness. Laughter is the medicine we are after.

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If, and only if, we feel completely stuck within the triggered experience which unfolds when we are in each other‟s company – then we may resort to the practice of gazing in that moment as a means to „break on through to the other side‟. This means, amidst the immense discomfort, we sit, face each other, enter silence and stillness, and gaze.

So, we gaze, and the practice of the gazing empowers us to unearth deeply hidden emotional signature. These signatures then arise within the days following our gazing practice, and they may arise while we are alone or when we are together – and we process them accordingly. The mechanics of processing of the emotional signature are always the same: Being silent and still within the feltaspect of the uncomfortable experience without placing any conditions upon our willingness to be so. As with all this work, the unfolding of the experience from the moment of triggering toward the moment of resolution is organic. Don't force anything. Posted by Michael... at 1:24 AM

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Thursday, April 23, 2009

AMAZING GAZING - PART V - The Bridge As we explore further aspects of intimacy we shall move more deeply into aspects of what we have discussed here. But for now – this piece of writing encapsulates all the instructions we require to initiate a deepening of this journey in a responsible, compassionate, and fruitful manner. There is however one more useful perceptual tool to share which adds a deeply compassionate vibrational resonance to our shared moments of emotional processing. This is called, „The Bridge‟.

In revealing this perceptual tool, we bring our discussion on the practice of gazing full circle, right back to where we commenced it: To the conscious establishment of clear intent when consciously exploring intimacy with another. As has been stated repeatedly throughout this NAKED journey – there is a radiance moved through in this heart-work – that when honored – facilitates our exploration into and through the resonance of intimacy: First we encounter and consciously commence the art of resolving emotional signatures reflected within our experience when alone, then we consciously commence resolving emotional signatures as reflected back to us through our birth family, and only then do we consciously initiate such a journey with a companion.

There is method in the deliberateness of this radiance. A crucial part of this is that we are to experientially establish an awareness of the divine aspect of ourselves which we call „the vibrational‟ – and this awareness is to be established experientially to some extent before we commence such a journey with another.

There is no formulae, no guaranteed step-by-step instruction that I know of, on how to establish this experiential awareness of our vibrational divinity as a certainty - other than our willingness to first process the emotional signatures within our experience that come up when we are alone, and then to commence this processing through the reflections revealed to us through our current way of relating to our birth family. Emotional processing does not „make this vibrational experience happen‟ – it simply serves to unmask what is already and always present.

In THE PRESENCE PROCESS we refer to this achievement of experiential vibrational awareness as „gaining an awareness of our Inner Presence‟. Our Inner Presence is an expression within this world experience of our vibrational actuality. We come to „know it‟ through emotional processing. We come to „know it‟ through the continual falling away of what it is masking its continuous presence. It is an awareness which visits us in a way that is customized to our personal perceptual capacities. Achieving it occurs „through us‟ and is therefore not something another can „do to us‟. It is 'a knowing' beyond any reasoning or any specific emotional, mental, and physical validation. 82

Once we have accomplished a certain amount of emotional processing, we real eyes there is a part of our experience that always is, always has been, and always will be. We „feel this to be so‟, and so we real eyes this through the gradual development of our felt-perception. This is not something we can prove to another or even communicate efficiently through the vehicle of „understanding‟. It arises only when we are ready to contain it – only when it is required. Once we know it, we know it. Our awareness of it does not require validation by another. If we are not yet aware of this aspect of ourselves – no amount of trying or discussing or asking questions or reading or listening to others achieves it. It is achieved experientially through removing the masking of it. It is our emotional imprinting which masks it. It is therefore achieved through the consistent and continual willingness „to consciously participate in processing what is not actual‟ – our emotional imprinting and the consequent mental and physical projections arising from within these dysfunctional energetic patterns.

What is valid in this discussion is this: If we are not yet to some extent experientially aware of this divine aspect of ourselves – of this part of us which is permanent, unchanging, and therefore eternal – then we are not yet ready to enter a conscious exploration of intimacy with another. This is because if we do not yet have this aspect of ourselves in which to take refuge – then when the shared upsets that explode from a practice like gazing arise – we immediately, reflexively, run from what is unfolding. Translated, it means we attempt to cage, kill, or flee the triggered experience we are having with our companion. This is what „breaking up‟ is. It is „the fleeing of a triggered emotional signature‟. If all we know of our current human experience is the emotional, mental, and physical aspect of it – then, when these deeply primal signatures arise and impact our emotional, mental, and physical parameters – we have nowhere from which to compassionately observe their unfolding. They become all-encompassing and overwhelming.

Within the context of exploring intimacy consciously with another we require an experiential knowing of our vibrational divinity. This does not mean we have achieved enlightenment, or any such claim. It simply means we are to some extent familiar with an aspect of our unfolding experience that is unchanging. This vibrational aspect within ourselves we then refer to as, „The Bridge‟. The Bridge is a place of beingness that is deeply connected to, yet also above and beyond, the waters of our everchanging and flowing human life experience. It remains untouched by anything emotional, mental, and physical that transpires as a consequence of our conscious exploration into intimacy with another. This too is why „we cannot find an intimacy companion‟. How do we know when another has already established this Bridge-awareness within themselves? We don‟t. Only the universe knows who has accomplished this experientially and is therefore for ready to face what must be faced by any two

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seeking to gather authentically and intimately in the name of love.

Therefore, once a suitable companion has been placed before us, and once we have approach them verbally with an invitation to explore intimacy, it is then imperative that we also verbally establish a mutual awareness of The Bridge factor within our intended exploration with each other. It may be explained from one to another in this manner: “This exploration into intimacy we are intending is going to uproot very deeply embedded emotional signatures related to the way the feminine and masculine are interacting with each other within ourselves. There is deep hurt within these age-old ways of relating that are going to arise and be consciously felt by us both. When we gaze together, these ancient energetic patterns are going to stir and eventually arise into our awareness as uncomfortable upsets unfolding between us. This is going to feel horrible at times – so horrible that we may feel compelled to run from each other. We therefore require „a place of beingness‟ that we may enter within ourselves so we may continue to have the capacity to participate in this processing work without destroying the fabric of our companionship. Let‟s call this place of beingness, „The Bridge‟. When something explodes unexpectedly between us it is not the end of the world, or the end of us being together. However, it may temporarily be impossible for us to interact with each other emotionally, mentally, and physically in „a loving, conscious, or compassionate manner‟. This is okay. This is going to happen. It is a required part of this journey we are agreeing to undertake together. When these upsets arise, the worst action we can possibly initiate is to talk about it – or to act out physically what we are feeling - like getting up and leaving. These imprinted emotional conditions arising because of our gazing practice may be so explosive that they immediately knock us into deep unconsciousness. The nature of the divine guidance accompanying this work is that when this happens one of us will be conscious enough to know that this is an event triggered by our gazing – or even simply triggered by our sincere intent to explore intimacy consciously with each other. Whoever retains this capacity of awareness is to say to the other, „See you on The Bridge‟. By one of us saying this to each other, what we are really saying is this: This is okay. Yes, it feels horrible right now, but it will come to pass if we apply the silence, stillness, and feltresonance of alchemical beingness to it. This is supposed to happen to us. Interacting with each other emotionally, mentally, and physically right now is futile. Even though we are together as this is happening, all the work right now must be inwardly directed. We must be in it as it is and not panic. Know that despite how this arising emotional signature is currently coloring our entire reality that I still and shall always love you. For now though, I am standing on The Bridge where nothing of this earth life changes the love between us. For now I meet you there until this is resolved within me. Once resolution arises, and we are able to laugh about it, which we shall, we may return to our emotional, mental, and physical interactions with each other. Don‟t be afraid of losing me, and don‟t run away from this experience, or from me. These turbulent waters shall flow beneath our Bridge and our love for each other shall remain. After this is passed, we shall have enhanced our capacity to be with each other just as we are. This is all required. Meet you on The Bridge my love.”

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If we do not establish The Bridge within our way of relating with our companion when consciously exploring intimacy with each other – we shall not make it through what is to be experienced upon such a journey. If we cannot verbally establish this Bridging capacity with another – our way of relating with them is not yet mature enough to enter such an experience.

An incapacity to establish and apply a perceptual tool like The Bridge is a direct consequence of not yet having done enough emotional processing of what is reflected back to us by our experience when we are alone, and it is a direct consequence of not yet having done enough emotional processing of what is reflected back to us when we sit around the dinner table with our birth family. Posted by Michael... at 1:47 AM

Thursday, June 4, 2009

CURRENTLY COMPLETE For the moment NAKED is complete. I am satisfied that this Blog site contains all the perceptual pointers any serious explorer in intimacy requires to initiate an experiential journey into intimacy. There is much more to the experience than is shared here. However, I am satisfied that anyone who makes use of these writings experientially shall be guided as I was into all they require. Subjects such as 'sexual healing' are discussed in detail on the PRESENCE PROCESS LIVE 365 broadcasts and so will at this moment not be written about. Posted by Michael... at 6:58 AM

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