In the Presence of Divine - Vol 2 - Chapter 8 - Tiruvottiyur Ramaswamy

9. Thiruvottriyur1 Ramaswamy I am the son of Pazhakadai Venkataramaiyar2. Our house was the Sri Maṭha camp. Wherever the Sri Maṭha shifted its camp, we went along, the whole family, and so we were part of the camp. To us Periyava was like an elder in the family, a grandfather figure. We related to him with the same liberty. I would run up to the pūjākaṭṭu and be driven off affectionately. Periyava would say “Go and have your bath and then came here, my boy!” My father hailed from Krishnapuram near Bhuvanagiri, in South Arcot. My father ran away from home because my grandfather reprimanded him for not taking his studies seriously. My father came to the Kumbakonam Maṭha and stayed on in the pāṭaśāla. My grandfather was priest at the Periyāndavar temple in Krishnapuram. My father was the eldest of seven children. For two years no one knew where my father was. He was in his sixth class at school when he ran away. He did not know anything about Periyava either. Somehow he stayed on in the Maṭha. One day when he fetched the silver stick that was part of the heraldry for Periyava. It was then that Periyava made enquiries about father. My father stayed on in the Maṭha and cooked the bhikṣa for Periyava. His was given a salary of two rupees a month. When he was thirty four he got married. It happened like this. A poor gentleman brought his daughter and prayed to Periyava for help because he did not have money to marry off his daughter. My mother was seventeen years of age. She had a very dark complexion, and my father was very fair. Periyava told my father, “Look here, marry this girl!” My father said “As commanded by Periyava” and the wedding took place, in Periyava‟s Maṭha. My father cooked Periyava‟s bhikṣa for twenty-five to twenty-six years. He was diabetic. So he told Periyava one day, “I am not able to manage long hours of wait before I eat my meal.” So Periyava told him to set up a fruit shop to make ends meet. That is why he came to be called Pazhakadai Venkataramaiyer He used to be called Krishnapuram Venkataramiyer and Pāṭaśāla Venkatramaiyer earlier. Kalki Sadasivam had printed a picture of Periyava for devotees to worship. My father took one copy from him, put it up in his shop and began selling fruits. I have four sisters. My father gave all his four daughters in marriage to Vedic scholars all his four daughters in marriage to Vedic scholars, thus one to a scholar in Yajur Veda, one to a scholar in Rig Veda and two to scholars in Sama Veda. My eldest sister is married to Sattanur Krishnamurthi Ganapāṭigal, of Yajur Veda. The second sister is married to „Bhringi‟ Venkataramaiyer, who teaches Veda Bhāṣya at the Maṭha. He is a Ṛg Vedin.

1

In northern Chennai; houses the ancient 6th century Thyagaraja temple built by the Pallavas, later renovated by the Cholas in the 10th and 11th centuries; Replete with inscriptions; The adiṣṭānams of two Pontiffs of the Śrī Maṭha -55th Pontiff Sri Chandrchuda III and the 61st Sri Mahadevendra Saraswati III are close by. 2 Lit. Fruit-shop Venkataramaiyer who cooked Periyava’s bhikṣa for several years

2 In the Presence of the Divine My third and fourth sisters are married to Sāma Vedins. The third lives in Vijayawada and the fourth in Tirividaimarudur pāṭaśāla. Our family shifted camp with the Maṭha. I often repeated the same class in different places… the first standard in one place and again in the next when the Maṭha shifted . . . Bhuvanagiri, Tiruchi, Mayavaram and so on. The Sri Maṭha camp would halt in every place for at least three to four months. Getting admitted in the local school was no problem at all because we were part of the Maṭha‟s camp. When Periyava camped in Ilayathankudi my eldest sister‟s wedding took place and I was invested with the sacred thread. I am now fifty eight and retired from service yesterday. We looked upon Periyava as one of our family without giving the matter a thought. We would walk up to him at any time. I did not know any fear or devotion then. We enjoyed all rights at the Maṭha. No one reprimanded us. I quarreled with Periyava like a disobedient child if he shooed me away to bathe. He taught me how to smear the sacred ash in the different parts of the body. Even today I smear the sacred ash just as he taught me. Periyava would tell us stories. He told us the story of Harishchandra and impressed upon us that we should never lie. Periyava said that the it was untruth, speaking untruth, that was at the bottom of all other wrongdoings. “Look, how Harishchandra never lied even when he went through such greet hardships!” Periyava told us this many times. I learnt to speak truth from Periyava. I have taught this to all in my family, my son, daughter in law and grandson. The Maṭha was camping at Tiruchanoor. I was in the fifth or sixth class at school. One day, it must have been about half past ten at night. There was not so much of crowd then and it was all very quiet. My father told me to bring two mango fruits from the store. I went up to where the camp‟s store was and picked out two fruits, one big one for me and the other smaller, for my father, since he was a diabetic. I lost my way in the building and did not know which way to go in the dark. I got out of the hall and was about to go down a short flight of stairs. I thought I saw my father lying down there. Actually it was Periyava. He was in yoga-nidra3, with his danda with him. He got up when I neared him and I realized that it was Periyava, not my father. I thought I would slip off quietly. “What is it?” I placed the fruits in front of him and told him everything. Periyava looked at me in a particular way, the way he did when he wanted prasāda to be given to a devotee. There was no one else except the two of us. He told me to watch him and learn how to eat mango fruit. He squeezed the fruit gently, first. Then he peeled the skin at the tip and started to eat the fruit and told me to eat the other fruit in the same way. I sat down near Periyava and the two of us ate mango fruit together. “Squeeze the fruit first and then peel a little at the tip. If you do this then you will get all the juice fully.” 3

Yogic-sleep; a state of conscious involution from the external world and senses.

3 Volume II- Article No 9/Thiruvottriyur Ramaswamy Periyava taught me how to eat mango fruit. After we finished the fruit Periyava started to chat about this and that. It went on for about two hours. Meanwhile my father waited for the fruit and vexed by the delay, finally went off to sleep. Periyava would sleep in a thatchedshed. He would simply lie down on a piece of mat, woven of coconut-frond. The next morning I told my father why I could get him the fruit. My father said, “I have been preparing his bhikṣa for so many years. Periyava has never accepted anything from my hand. I serve Periyava his bhikṣa, move away and stand aside. You are fortunate!” Not only did Periyava accept a fruit from my hand, he also made me eat along with him. Periyava camped in Tirupathi for three or four months. I went as usual with the Maṭha‟s camp, since it was school -vacation after the ninth class. I wore my hair in a tuft then4. If we went everyday to the Maṭha then Periyava would tell us to fetch prasāda to give to the devotees. Only „regulars‟ would be blessed to do such errands. I did not think it great to be so close to Periyava then. To me he was one of our family. Periyava commanded great respect from all. One morning Periyava started from the Sri Maṭha‟s camp at about six in the morning, walked about and finally entered the temple. Periyava told me to have some milk left over from the prasāda and then to do ācamana at the Maṭha before we left. As soon as we went for darśan, camphor was waved and Periyava performed danda-namaskaram. At least fifty laddus were placed in front of the deity as offering. I stood gaping at the huge basket of sweet-meat. I wished I could get at least one of them. “Look at the Swami. Don‟t look elsewhere” said Periyava. I could not take my eyes off the laddus. “Don‟t look anywhere else. Look at the Swami, look at the Swami” Periyava said for the second time. I did not watch the votive offering of camphor or the deity at all. My mind and eyes were fixed on the basket of laddus. After the darśan, we came out and Periyava started for the Maṭha. He instructed the man who carried the basket that it had to be taken and deposited in the room where I slept. I wanted just one of those big laddus and then I hoped I would get all of them, and here was Periyava giving away the whole basket to me! “Go to the santarpaṇa and come back after the meal” said Periyava. I chose my own course of action, however. I received vibhuti prasāda from Periyava and rushed to the room with the man carrying the basket of laddus behind me. Finally we reached the room and the basket was deposited there by the man. There were many monkeys in that place. So I shut the windows. I gave one laddu to the man who carried the basket but he refused to take it and went away. After he left I looked at the laddus. I waited for a while, hoping that Periyava would direct devotees to this room to get their prasāda from me. I felt 4

Those serving at close quarters had to wear their hair in a tuft and perform all the prescribed daily obligations such as Gāyatri.

4 In the Presence of the Divine grand for I had to officiate in the distribution of the laddus as prasāda to the devotees who came to Periyava for darśan. No one came. So I went out of the room, taking care to close the door behind me and standing outside called out to the passersby- pilgrims, all of them and asked them if they wanted laddus. They thought perhaps that I was trying to sell laddus. Everyone I accosted said “We don‟t want it!” I did not see a soul there who was known to me, known faces whom I could accost or who would recognize me and talk to me. Finally at about four in the afternoon, I picked out a single almond from a laddu and ate it. I wanted to feel great, distributing prasāda to devotees who would come thronging to me. Nothing of the sort happened. I went back to Periyava leaving the door open so that the monkeys could enjoy the laddus. When I went in and stood before Periyava, he asked me, “Did you eat the laddus?” “No” I said, “I was chasing the monkeys away and waiting for people to come and get the laddus!” When Periyava camped in Ilayathankudi my eldest sister5 was married. Everything needed for the marriage, was given by the Maṭha. Periyava was camping in a huge building. The Sri Maṭha camp was on one side of the building and the wedding took place on the other. The building was so huge. The elephant in the Maṭha came in the wedding procession. A man who came with the bridegroom‟s entourage lit fireworks. Quite by chance one that was flung hit the elephant in its foot. It got into a panic and ran to the other side of the building straight to Periyava, trumpeting „Sankara Sankara‟ as it had been trained. This brought Periyava to where the celebrations were afoot. Periyava was all consternation. “Is all this extravagance necessary in a wedding? I am always repeating the need for simplicity and right here in the Maṭha, you have this procession and fireworks!” My second sister was given in marriage to the son of Thiagarajaiyer, who was the agent for the Sri Maṭha in Rameswaram. He had seven acres of land and was very wealthy. He gave away everything in writing to the Maṭha and with just a brass pot to perform his rituals and holding his son by the hand, came to the Sri Maṭha, taking refuge in Periyava. He was my father‟s friend. The Sankara Maṭha in Rameswaram is housed in their property. My brother in law was born there. Periyava educated my brother in law from fifth class to the Pre-University Course, at Thiagaraja College. He walked everyday to college from Vannarpet. He did Ṛg Veda adhyayana and now teaches Veda Bhāṣya at the Sri Maṭha. He is Bhringi Venkataramaiyer. He taught Veda Bhāṣya to Pudu Periyava. He is fluent and well educated both in English and Sanskrit. Involved in innumerable responsibilities one day Pudu Periyava could not make it to class on time. So Venkararamaiyer refused to teach his pupil further! “All said and done I am Guru and Pudu Periyava is pupil. It is not right that I am made to wait!”

5

To Sattanur Ghanapāṭigal

5 Volume II- Article No 9/Thiruvottriyur Ramaswamy Then he was somehow coaxed back to good humor. Even now one cannot say when he will fly into a rage and for what reason. If I needed a pair of Periyava‟s pādukās I would simply go into the Sri Maṭha, take one and came out. I usually did so if devotees wanted it for worship. As a boy I would bring a pair of pādukās to give away if I was promised some pickle or more so, some good coffee. Periyava‟s pādukās would cling to his feet and when he walked, there would be no sound whatsoever. If there was a clicking sound then he would not wear the pair. I had three pairs in all. Of these we brought two pairs which we found in my father‟s house in his native place. I gave away one pair to Nilakantaiyer. The second pair I gave away to Thiruvothiyur6 Viswanathaiyer. In this pair you could see the imprint of Periyava‟s feet, deep. It was so worn and used. Many asked me for it. But although Viswanathaiyer already had a pair, still I gave it to him, because I felt I must. This pain is now covered with silver and he called it utsava mūrthi while he called the other pair he had as mūla mūrthi7. Periyava shifted his camp to Cholavandan. It may have been in 1970 or so. I appeared for the SSLC examinations and failed. I could walk up to the pūjākaṭṭu because of my father‟s presence there. If devotees said they would give me a glass of coffee I would take them right up to Periyava and ensure that they had their darśan and audience with him. Or at times it was for five or ten rupees. One day a gentleman arrived with his family, wife, son, daughter and others. He introduced himself as T.R. Mahalingam and said that he was a singer and actor. When people requested me to take them to Periyava I had to know some details about them, so that I could present them to Periyava. There were some others waiting along with this gentleman who also requested me to take them close to Periyava. Though they were actually residents of that town, I presented them simply as the gentlemen‟s relatives for want of anything better to say. Periyava was lying down but he got up when I went with these people. He made kind enquiries of the devotees, gave them mango fruit and sugar candy. They left in such visible joy. Before I could go out Periyava stopped me and asked me, “What was the deal?” “Fifteen rupees…” “Is that the value of the Maṭha?” I did not know what to say, because I had been doing this for four or five days then. “Have you taken the money from them?” “No, not yet . . . I take it only after the darśan is over. Also I don‟t take money if they are not well-off. Some say they don‟t have money.”

6

Same as Thiruvottriyur, in colloquial speech Deities of five metals and stone respectively, the former for festivities and processions, the latter installed in the sanctum sanctorum for worship 7

6 In the Presence of the Divine If some devotees offered to take me to their house and give me a good glass of coffee, I used to taken them in for darsan. “You and I are not important, the good name of the Maṭha is. People will not speak ill of you, Venkataramaiyer‟s son, but the Maṭha will fall into disrepute Also you will become a slave to money. One must not be enslaved by money…” I was with Periyava for quite a long time before I came out. The devotees were waiting for me. T.R.Mahalingam offered me five hundred rupees which was a lot of money those days. I refused to take it. “You can give me a meal and some coffee if you like” I said. So they took me to their lodgings and very respectfully served me a meal. To this day I have never taken so much as a rupee in Periyava‟s name. When my father passed away, Periyava sent a representative from the Maṭha with money, twenty thousand rupees, to bear the expenses for the rituals for the ensuing twenty days. My father had left ten thousand rupees with his cousin, to take care of expenses following his death. So I refused to take the money sent from the Maṭha. Later, when all the formalities were over, I went to Periyava and told him that I managed everything with the money left behind by my father. Periyava blessed me. Two days after the T.R.Mahalingam incident, in Cholavandan, Periyava told me to leave the Maṭha. I did not know what to do. I told my father about it. “Ask Periyava what you must do and do as he says. I know nothing” he said. I told Periyava “I have failed the SSLC exams. I know nothing about the world. Where will I go and what can I do?” “It is for your good that I tell you to leave the Maṭha. It is good that you go out for a few years” Periyava replied. “Let me stay on in Maṭha…” “What service do you do here in the Maṭha? Do you serve food in the santharpaṇa? Or grind sandal paste? Or help in the abhiṣeka? What do you do here? Of course, I did none of these. “It will do you good to go out. Do as I say . . . ” A devotee in Tiruchi helped me to get into I.T.I institute. The course begins only in August, so I was not late. I passed the course in the second rank. The first four rank-holders were offered placement by at least ten different firms and institutions. I was offered a posting at the Aeronautic Development Authority, but I did not take it because I would have had to go to Bangalore. I joined this Company in 1975 and retired in 2011.

7 Volume II- Article No 9/Thiruvottriyur Ramaswamy The company where I worked suffered a lockout. I had got married in 1976, and my responsibilities had increased. To make ends meet I opened a fruit-shop opposite the one outside the Ashtalakshmi temple8. A huge picture of Ashtalakshmi - of the 2B size - used to be sold there for eleven rupees. I bought one and made small copies of it, stuck the pictures of Periyava and Pudu Periyava on either side as if they were blessing us. Of this modified picture, I got ten thousand copies made by photo-print at Star Studio at Triplicane, and priced it at fifty paise each. Mukkur Varadachariar9 filed a case against me, and his son-in-law, who was a lawyer took it up seriously. The bundles of pictures were confiscated. I was out of work because of the lockout and this pliant came to add to my woes. I was very disturbed for about six months. I told my father about it. He said, “Go to Mukkur and prostrate to him. Tell him you have committed an error and ask him for forgiveness. He will surely forgive you.” I went to Mukkar and did what my father instructed me to. But I was not forgiven, his son in law, especially, was furious and he said he will deal with me legally. This plunged me into anxiety and I feared police arrest. I went and submitted my woes to Periyava who was silent. I made a clean breast of everything. There were summons from the court and I thought I was going to lose my job altogether, as a consequence. I could not ignore the summons. “Did you tell your father?” Periyava was then in Tenampakkam. I replied that I had told my father everything and also that I had appealed to Mukkur for forgiveness and was sent away. That day Mukkur Varadachariar and the owner of Lakshmi Mills came for darśan. Periyava had go in and so darśan was not possible. I offered to take them in. Mukkur declined my offer but the owner of Lakshmi Mills accepted it. He coaxed the other to join him and along with them Mukkur‟s son in law and their people came in with me for darśan. The complaint against me was placed before Periyava. Mukkur‟s son in law was very firm. “He must be punished, because he was done wrong. Or else it will go on like this” he said. At least some small punishment needs to given to him,” he said. The owner of Lakshmi Mills told me to speak. I repeated to Periyava what I had already told him earlier, about my wrong-doing and my futile attempt to ask Mukkur for forgiveness. Periyava was silent for a while. Then he asked, “Will it be a very big case?” “Yes” said Mukkur‟s son in law. Then Periyava spoke, addressing his words to Mukkur. “This young man is known to you. His father is your friend. Did you give this young man a chance?”

8

In Besant Nagar, Chennai; A temple primarily dedicated to the eight forms of Goddess Lakshmi; its foundation was laid in 1974 and the temple was consecrated in 1976 9 AVaiṣṇavite scholar and devotee of Periyava, who built this temple with Periyava’s blessings

8 In the Presence of the Divine The son in law replied that I had done everything knowingly and so deserved to be jailed. The owner of Lakshmi Mills told Mukkur that Periyava seemed angry and so he must speak with restraint. Periyava heard their side and said, “Yes, he has done wrong and so deserves to be punished. In the picture that you have printed, on top you have put the words „With the blessings of Kanchi Kamakoti Sankaracharya.‟ Have you taken permission for that from the Maṭha before you got the copyright for the printed picture? All the monetary collections were made with this proclamation. Anyway…why overlook this boy‟s fault because he is connected with the Maṭha?” Everyone was taken aback by Periyava‟s reaction. Periyava continued. “Do you know how much this boy has suffered? Do you know what hardship his father has gone through serving the Maṭha all these years? You know his father. His father has fed me for so long. Don‟t you know him? You did not come to me. You wished for Periyava‟s blessing, for the Maṭha‟s name to build the temple, and then you performed the kumbhābhiṣekam for which you did not want the Maṭha or Periyava . . .” No one had seen Periyava so upset. The visitors were shaken. Mukkur was in tears. They said they would withdraw the case. “Do you have copyright for the picture you have released with the Maṭha‟s name and the pictures of Periyava?” asked Periyava. They offered to pay me compensation. Anyway the matter was resolved. The owner of Lakshmi Mills gave me his card and offered me money. I accepted only seven and fifty rupees that I had spent in connection with this problem. Later Periyava asked me if I had spent money on this case. When I said that I had, he asked me why I did not ask for it. For six months before that Periyava had been silent, never once responding, though usually he replied to me in a minute. I did not know of Periyava‟s greatness then. To us he was just part of the family, a grandfather. Only now I realize his greatness. He has tapped me with his danda. He was always so careful, but it happened one day. Periyava and I have celebrated Dīpāvali together He did not favor fireworks. A kind of scented powder would be thrown into the fire and that would glow and spread a fragrance. I had the adhiṣtānams at Thiruvothiyur cleaned. Wild grass had covered it. Periyava has visited the adhiṣtānams twice. I remember the story of Harishchandra that Periyava told me and I tell my family the same thing –not to lie. Periyava was one of us, so simple that we did not know. Periyava sent for my father when he was in Gulbarga. My father went and stayed on in the camp for ten days and served Periyava his bhiskṣa. When he got ready to return Periyava said, “Stay on for another fifteen days and serve me bhikṣa.

9 Volume II- Article No 9/Thiruvottriyur Ramaswamy “I want to return home. I feel I will pass away soon. I want to be with my son when I die.” “You wished to die in Thiruvothiyur. You had such a thought years ago, didn‟t you?” “Yes” said my father when Periyava reminded him of a desire he had cherished in his heart, which he had kept all to himself. He had never spoken about it. “Now your son lives in Thiruvothiyur. Do you want anything?” “I get a little rent from my house. I manage with that.” “Does your son earn much?” My son too does not get a big salary, His earnings are meager. But we manage . . . when I die I wish to be with my son and I wish to lie with my head on my son‟s lap as I breathe my last. This is what I ask of you. We are happy.” “Are you asking me for a boon?” “Yes, I am . . . ” “So be it! It shall be as you wish..!” “To die quickly. . .” “Is there anything else that you want?” “I wish to see the deity in Tirupathi.” “Why?” “I have not seen the deity though I have been there so many times with Periyava and even though I was asked to go in. Sometimes I have had a glimpse of the deity from outside, but I wish to go near and see the deity once.” Even as my father was talking to Periyava, a Minister from Andhra arrived there and placed his daughter‟s wedding invitation in Periyava‟s presence and prayed for his blessings. The wedding was to take place at Tirupathi. Periyava gave the gentleman his blessings and said, pointing to my father, “This gentleman will attend your daughter‟s wedding on my behalf!” When my father got off at Tirupathi he was escorted to the wedding chowltry to the accompaniment of nātaswaram. He was taken for darśan to the temple, right inside without any fuss and treated with utmost respect. He was put on the train with a first class ticket and offered two thousand rupees. My father lived only for two months after that. He took down the picture of my mother with him sitting side by side, in two chairs, cut it in the middle and

10 In the Presence of the Divine framed them as two pictures. When he was asked why he did that he said, “She has gone . . . you people will perform sumangali prārtana10 and offer flowers . . .” Then my father framed his picture also and hung it. You can see both with the clock in between on the wall . . . up there. Then before his passing he went to the adiṣṭānam here at Thiruvothiyur and clutching the locked gates prayed aloud, “Look after my children and my family. I leave them in your care. Look after my son. The child does not know anything.” This was on Rathasaptami11 in the month of Thai, during Śankarānti in January. At night he was saying „Rama Rama‟ and turning from side to side. He said that whenever he felt uncomfortable. He had some-warm water which I helped him drink holding him on my lap. My wife and others urged me to take him to the 24 hour hospital. I knew he was passing away. Anyway I did so even as put him into the auto, he breathed his last. He passed away on Bhīshmāṣṭami12. In the early hours, that day Periyava – who was camping far away in Karnataka- told his attendants to phone me and enquire about my father. The attendant had replied “We spoke to him yesterday and everything was fine. I shall enquire tomorrow.” “Ask now, my boy “Periyava seems to have insisted. So they phoned me at about six in the morning and I told them. He passed away just as he prayed for, as assured by Periyava, here at home in Thiruvothiyur, lying on my lap, and in seconds, so quickly. It is all Periyava‟s grace. **********************************************************************

10

Lit. ‘prayer to the deceased lady who passed away while her husband was alive’; A domestic celebration before or after auspicious events such as marriages, in remembrance of the ladies of the family who died while their husband were alive 11 Marks the seventh day following the Sun‟s northerly movement (Uttarāyaṇa) of vernal equinox starting from Capricorn (Makara). It is symbolically represented in the form of the Sun God Surya turning his ratha or chariot drawn by seven horses, representing the seven colours, towards the northern hemisphere, in a north-easterly direction. It also marks the birth of Surya and hence celebrated as Surya Jayanti. 12 The eighth day of waxing half of Hindu month of Magha (January-February) which was chosen by the ascetic prince Bhishma, to depart from life after lying on a bed of arrows for 58 days; recalling his celibate life of selfdenial, loyalty, and devotion.libations are offered to Bhishma by all Hindus