Grey School Newspaper 11

Whispering Grey Matters

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Spring 2007

Whispering Grey Matters

SPRING 2007 WGM STAFF

Spring 2007

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

A Tour of the Newsroom .................................................. 3 AWARDS: Dean's List, House Hat, Lodge Cup, Lumos ....... 4-6 FACULTY ADVISOR: Professor Moonwriter UPDATES: Faculty, Groups, Clubs, Committees, GSW NEWS DESK: Houses, Lodges, Captains' Updates ............. 6-9 Editor: FrogsDancing New Classes ................................................................. 10 Writers: JanicaJayne, Silentfaun, Moonwriter 2007 Winter Bird Count ................................................. 11 New Award in the Dark Arts ........................................... 12 NEWS DESKS: Department Focus: Alchemy ........................................... 13 Editor: Moonwriter April Fool's or Bust ........................................................ 14 World Wide Wizardly Web (Part 1) ................................... 15 INTERNATIONAL NEWS DESK: Keepsake Painted Eggs .................................................. 16 Editor: Xyaida Spoof or Scam? ............................................................ 17 Writers: Moonwriter New Classes (Continued) ............................................... 18 OPINIONS DESK: Interview with Lord Richter ....................................... 19-20 Editor: Laneth Shadow-Walker Virtual Wizardry ........................................................... 20 Writers: Xyaida, Areeya, Moonwriter, Jymi X/0 Fun Facts about April Fool's Day ..................................... 21 Aurora Borealis (poem) ................................................. 21 ARTS & CULTURE DESK PantheaCon 2007 Report ............................................... 22 Editor: Wingseeker Robert Anton Wilson Has Left the Building ........................ 23 Writers: FrogsDancing, Silentfaun, Moonwriter Quantum Physics: Surfing the Wave Funcions ................... 24 The Mysteries of Hibernation .......................................... 25 SCIENCE DESK: Woodchuck Tongue Twister Riddle ................................... 25 Editor: Jymi X/0 HOLIDAY LORE: Osatara, Imbolc, April Fool's, Writers: Moonwriter, Tigers Moondiva, Xyaida Groundhog's Day ...................... 26-28 FOOD DESK: Meán Fómhair /|\ Meán Earraigh – Turning the Wheel ........ 28 Editor: Donella Lyonesse Alchemy as a Whole ...................................................... 29 Writers: Tigers Moondiva, Moonwriter The Butt of the Joke ...................................................... 29 The Fool and Morris Dancing ........................................... 30 WIZARDING DESK: Tarot: The Fool ............................................................. 31 Editor: Laneth Shadow-Walker FOOD: Getting Ready for Summer, Food Pranks, Writers: Anna Fox, Tyrssen, Jymi X/0 Kitty Litter Cake, Springtime Feasting, Spring Flower Salad ...................... 32-34 ART DESK: Internet Rumors ........................................................... 35 Editor: Areeya Prayer for a Wizard (Poem) ............................................ 35 Artists: Tyrssen, Lady Sigel, Jymi X/0 The Tides Will Rise ........................................................ 36 COVER: Areeya (Joker), Tyrssen (Masthead) & Do What Thou Will but Harm None .................................. 37 Jymi X/0 (Flower photo & layout) April Tricksters ............................................................. 38 Tag, You're It (Poem) .................................................... 38 PERMISSIONS DESK: FrogsDancing REVIEWS: Maximum Ride, The New Harry Potter, The Dresden Files, The Illusionist, HUMOR DESK: Spring Film List ................................. 39-40 Writers: An Infinite Number of Monkeys Editor: The Biggest Monkey in the Room at the Time Census-ored ................................................................. 41 Pet Health: Tips and Tricks (Part 1) ............................ 42-43 COPY EDITOR & LEAD PUBLISHER: Jymi X/0 Spring's Special Rabbit .................................................. 43 All About (Digital) Easter Eggs ........................................ 44 CONTRIBUTING AUTHORS AND ARTISTS: The Healing Rite: Grey School Folk at Work ................. 45-46 Kalla, Quiet Bear, Belenus, Cashew, Garwulf, Aurora Vampira, S. Aaran Sherwood, Filia Chironis, Elizabeth Barrette Additional illustrations from the Dover Clip Art Series

Whispering Grey Matters is a quarterly newsletter produced by and for the students and faculty of The Grey School of Wizardry (www.greyschool.com). All contents herein are c 2007 Grey School, except where otherwise noted. Copyrights revert to original authors and artists upon publication.

Jymi X/0

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Advisor's Column: A Tour of the Newsroom By Prof. Moonwriter, Advisor, Whispering Grey Matters – Circle of the Standing Stones

Hi everyone! It’s time for another advisor’s column, and I’ve decided to use it to take you behind the scenes of Whispering Grey Matters for a quick tour of the Newsroom. It’s usually cloaked, but I know the password—just stay close so you don’t get lost. When you enter the WGM Newsroom (having given the secret knock), the first thing you’ll see is my office. It’s not that big, but I have a good desk and solid bookshelves and a window that looks out over the Wortcunning greenhouses. At the far end of the space is a huge fireplace and a common room-sitting area where we hold our weekly staff meetings. On either side of the space are what we call the WGM “Desks,” a newspapery word for “departments” or “sections.” Currently WGM has eight Desks: News, International, Science, Opinion, Wizarding, Arts & Culture, Food, and Grey School. Each Desk has a section editor and a team of writers, each with their own desks and computers and altar spaces. (Newspapering takes lots of magick!) Flanking the fireplace are three offices. On one side, two smaller offices belong to our Permissions Wizard—who handles copyrights, plagiarism issues, etc.—and our Art Department. The other side holds our Publisher’s office and workspace; this is where she does paste-up and layout, and puts the paper together. (She gets a little stressed at times, but responds well to pizzas slid under her door.) The Newsroom walls are covered with pieces of art in progress, story outlines, and the occasional ritual schematic. A giant whiteboard next to the Publisher’s office holds our current “Story Board,” a master plan for the issue-in-progress. All story ideas and artwork are listed on the Story Board, allowing the staff to see the paper coming together. Everything in the WGM Newsroom works by a chain of command—each staffer knows their job, does it well, and works cooperatively with the staffers and positions ‘linked’ to theirs. It’s taken a couple of years of trial and error to reach this point, but it’s been worth it. Our newspaper just keeps getting better, as does the caliber of the student staff. I couldn’t be prouder! If anyone is interested in joining the WGM staff, please apply by visiting the WGM Newsstand (on the Forums) and dropping us a note. Journalistic blessings!

Illustration by Tyrssen

"...And then, PRESTO! Just like that! A brand new WGM issue! Easy!"

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The Dean's List Any teacher may nominate any student for the Dean's List (DL) in recognition of academic excellence demonstrated in a Class taught by that teacher. Three nominations earn the student DL status for their current year level. This can be from three different teachers, or from the same teacher but regarding different Classes. Both full-time students and combined faculty-students can be nominated for the Dean’s List. Dean's List appointments are made as they occur. Once on the Dean's List, the student's name remains posted for six months from the appointment date. Students who make the Dean's List once will graduate cum laude ("with honor"). Students, who make the Dean's List more than once, but not all 7 Levels, will graduate magna cum laude ("with high honor"). Students who make the Dean's List at all 7 Levels will graduate summa cum laude ("with highest honor"). Now without further ado, I give you the current members of the Deans List: tigersmoondiva, since 3/12/2007 – Winds; L1 Donella Lyonesse, since 3/12/2007 – Winds; L1 Oranstar, since 3/10/2007 – Stones; L1 wikyd angel, since 2/20/2007 – Waters; L1 Sola DragonShadow, since 2/19/2007 – Flames; L1 janicajayne, since 2/13/2007 – Flames; L1 Zenergynus, since 2/12/2007 – Flames; L1 Grey Panther, since 2/12/2007 – Flames; L3 Arzelie, since 2/10/2007 – Stones; L1 Talin, since 1/22/2007 – Winds; L1 Moonwriter, since 1/20/2007 – Stones; L8 Filia Chironis, since 1/9/2007 – Flames; L1 Xyaida, since 12/30/2006 – Flames; L1 Dragons Light, since 12/20/2006 – Flames; L3 dark eagle, since 10/20/2006 – Undines/Waters; L4 Fenrous, since 10/10/2006 – Waters; L1 Kalla, since 9/21/2006 – Stones; L7

The Hat and The Cup The House Hat goes to the GNOMES! Their score was 5.43. Our 30 Gnomes earned 73 academic credits and 90 merits this term—good work; and Congratulations! The Lodge Cup goes to THE ORDER OF THE DANCING FLAMES! At 13.92—the highest score ever! Our 128 Flames earned 556 credits, and a whopping 1,226 merits! Unbelievable! Congratulations, Flames! The Flames also win notoriety for being the first group to ever break the 1000 merit mark…This kind of spirit is what makes the GSW succeed! They have set a marvelous precedent for our school. It was a truly inspirational performance. Well done!

Spring 2007

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The Lumos Awards for the spring-to-fall 2007 equinoctial period go to: The Flames Lodge! The Stones Lodge! Both of these groups met or exceeded all seven of the basic requirements. The specifics may be viewed in posts on the Dean of Students forum. Check it out! For the next six month period, members of our Lumos groups-- the Flames and Stones -- are entitled to use a special Lumos avatar, designed by Xander Gael of the Stones, especially for this award. Honorable Mention goes to the following groups, who, although they didn't quite complete every requirement, they worked hard to reach towards Lumos and proudly reported their progress in doing so. There is no doubt that they'll make it next time! The Winds, in particular, were a mere heartbeat away. The Gnomes House The Waters Lodge The Winds Lodge Congratulations! To All of our Lumos Participants! What's the Lumos Award all about? It's there to honor and recognize Houses and Lodges who are active in their group and the school, who exemplify everything from academics to spirit, and who are led by a trained and active Head and Prefect. We have credits, merits, and a Dean's list to honor individual achievement. For a House or Lodge to achieve Lumos is a demonstration of their cooperative excellence, and shows that they are taking the steps towards moving beyond an online "message forum" and becoming, instead, a true community.

Faculty Updates

New Faculty Welcome to our newest faculty member, Hillary “Grey Panther” Fischer, BA, MEd. She will be an instructor in the Ceremonial Magicks Department. Hillary has known she was a Wizard since she was 13 and read ‘The Once and Future King.’ But of course, back then there were no schools like Grey School! She has spent over 40 years walking the Mystical Path, seeking the wisdom of the Ancients. She graduated with a BA in Psychology and History, and a Masters in Education, specializing in Counseling and Guidance. Currently, she is pursuing her Doctorate in Metaphysics. Hillary has done a bit of everything during her life, including raising dairy goats, running an Armed Security business, building and renovating houses, training dogs, and devoting herself to spiritual pursuits. Today, she walks the Druid Path and regularly dips into Shamanic Practices. She can be found at www.theinnersanctuary.net. Departments of Interest: Alchemy & Magickal Sciences, Ceremonial Magick, Magickal Practice, Mind Magicks, and Wizardry Faculty Changes Professor Stacey Aaran Sherwood has become the Dean of Alchemy. Professor Brighid Delphinos has become the Dean of Healing. Professor Rainbow Stonetalker has become the Dean of Mind Magicks. Professor Uta “Rainmaker” Stelson has become the Dean of Magickal Practice. Professor Dustin “Greycloak” Haas has become the Assistant Dean of Performance Magicks and an Administrative Assistant. Professor Anna Fox and Professor David Smith have become the new school counselors. Faculty Leavings Professor Craig Parsons and Professor Lady Ravenweed have left the school to pursue other options.

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Student Updates

Collected and Edited by FrogsDancing

GROUPS Seattle Grey School of Wizardry At the Oregon Conclave 2006, there was a great discovery. It was discovered that quite a few members from the Grey School resided in the Seattle-Metro area. We decided to form a study / support group. The group has grown and shrank and grown again. All told there are 5 official members with the hopes of more yet to come. We have had many adventures together and have offered each other a lot of encouragement and support over these past few months. Together we have come together for study groups, offered challenges to get essays done as well as trying to get classes finished. Some of our extra curricular activities have included making candles, getting together for the Sabbats, going for hikes in the woods, a tour of some of the local magick shops, and trips to Mount Saint Helens visitor center and the Pacific Ocean. We have currently been working on the planning of the Washington 2007 Conclave, including trips to Lewis and Clark State Park for info finding sessions. We had a couple of planning sessions so far and are looking forward to the fun of the Grey School in an old growth forest this summer. We came together as a study group, but we became so much more. Over the past few months we have become a family. We are the Seattle Grey School of Wizardry. BB, RowanTree Spire of the Four Winds

CLUBS Defensor's Club Update! Greetings! This is Defensor Amplus WillowRune, President of the Defensor's Club. Currently, the club is testing new methods of magickal defense and security. Topics we have covered so far are Witch Jars, Egregores, Shields, Vampires and Verbal Self Defense. A few Defensors are also training up to meet the rigorous needs of holding security at their local Conclave this summer. Let’s give all of our Defensors a round of applause for their effort in becoming better wizards to make our community a safer place! Yours in Service, Defensor Amplus WillowRune The following Clubs did not submit an update for this edition of WGM: The Society for the Study and Care of Beasts Diggers In Real Time (D.I.R.T.) The Healers’ Tea Room The Lore Keepers' Guild The Tower of Babel ‘Camp Grey Roots’ has reportedly disbanded.

COMMITTEES Unfortunately, the Fundraising and Marketing Committees were also unable to submit updates for this issue of WGM; we are however looking forward to updates for the future editions.

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Spring 2007

HOUSES

Gnomes-

The Gnomes have been working hard to win the House Cup, but activity on the forums seems to be very rare and when it does come, it's small. Still, we are putting up a hard fight against the Salamanders for the House Cup. In doing this, we are fighting a former Gnome. This is because Kristalbrooke handed over her duty as Housemistress to Professor Sherwood so that she could become the Salamander's Housemistress. Ironic no? Well, now we often have challenges going up to give our Gnomes a chance to earn some more merits. Hopefully activity will boost. ~Wingseeker

UndinesWe Undines students are a tricky bunch. We submerge ourselves and remain very, very still. Our masters foolishly think we are sleeping, but we're not. As we know very well, there is much more hidden beneath the surface (of the water). This period, our very own Dragonbringer and Darkeagle have "graduated" to the mysteries of adulthood and have joined the Waters' Lodge. Congrats to them from the Undines house! Also, with the passing of time, is responsibility – coming and going. In this light, it should be announced that I, Gero, will be done with my term as prefect of the Undines House and will be taking over as House Captain. In turn, Kelwyn will take over as our next Undines House prefect. Please join me in giving congrats to everyone, even those not mentioned here, who are involved in or are undergoing change. Blessed be, my friends.

Tyrssen

-Gero

SylphsThe Sylph House is moving along and I think it has been a wonderful session in our history. We have decided on our mascot, who is Piper Stewart’s parrot named Sydney! He will be giving pictures for the Sylph homepage as soon as he can. The contest that we’ve been planning has finally come. The theme was sylph or air-related artwork or poems. I have to admit there were only a few submissions, but still I think it was an enjoyable experience and we might do it again. The Sphinx Lair had been going strong for a while. It was temporarily put aside when I got tied up with the matters of a new prefect. Speaking of that, our prefect-elect as of now is Amalthia! She has just returned to GSW, and was actually a prefect once before. We welcome her back, along with Colubra. Recently Ocean Zephyr has joined the Sylph House. Bremen, Justin 21289, and Tora Wolf have graduated to the Winds Lodge. Congratulations to all those people. And as for the Sylph House, I hope everything keeps getting better as we progress to future years. ~Aurora Vampira~* Sylphs Prefect WGM did not receive an update from the Salamanders for this edition.

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Spring 2007

LODGES WatersWell met, The Coterie of the Flowing Waters does be still this time of year. I am anticipating a thaw in the spring. The Waters are currently working on a Lodge Foundation Legend that shows some promise. There is also a vote underway to decide what name Solaris will don as my right hand within the Lodge. Memsev will be taking the reigns from Darkman, who has served as Prefect for two terms. I am certain that she will be a pebble in the pond =) Class-work has been excellent however participation is something that I am continuing to work on. There have been signs of improvement. Since I became Lodge master there have been many new additions to the Lodge, including wonderful students like Dark Eagle and Memsev. I am proud of the Waters and encourage them in their endeavors. -- Greycloak

StonesThe Circle of Standing Stones is starting to roll again, for a while there we were standing still but once you get us moving we are hard to stop. The addition of new Tyrssen members Kerwin, Moira, Myrddin, MysticalDragon, Rosewood Moonhealer, Rain Storm, Tangentslayer, Silentfaun, Flamekeeper, KnightOfCups, and Dvarrikos the Enchanter have added new life into lodge. Also we welcomed EBLO Moon, who turned 18 and moved from the Gnomes House into the Stones Lodge! We have met the criteria for the Lumos Award and are now adding more classes to the list. From this 5 Stones are now on the Dean's List, Arzelie, Cashew, Kalla, Moonwriter, and Xander. We are the only House or Lodge in the GSW to have our very own ghost! Lord Richter. Watch for him to materialize on the forums from time to time. Moonwriter's new book, Gargoyles, is now available and can be purchased from Amazon, Powells, Barnes & Noble, etc. Several Stones members did illustrations or writings for the book. For Yule we collected greetings and wishes for the Headmaster from our members and compiled them together into a card that was sent to him along with a Spirit of the Wolf clock for his office. The Wolf is our Lodge Totem animal. We are currently gearing up for The Earth Day Challenge, The Stones Lodge has won this event for two years running and plans to make it a third! I will be stepping down as Prefect and the end of this term and will begin my term as Vice Lodge Captain. Oranstar will become the new Prefect of the Stones Lodge and will take office in March. Finally I will be launching my Prefect Project this week on the Stones Lodge and then on the school as a whole a bit later, please watch for it as it should be a lot of fun for both Houses and Lodges. Cashew The Winds and the Flames did not submit any updates for this edition of WGM.

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Spring 2007

My time as Vice Captain has gone by fast. Now I'm hoping to do well as I step up to the Captain position. I share Kalla's amazement at the growth our school has had over the last couple of years. When I first joined, there were less than 60 of us and I'm happy to see 600+ students now. Seeing so many kindred spirits in one place is something I never thought I'd see. I hope to continue being of service in the next six months. I've found that teaching others is a great way to learn, so I thank all of you who have asked me for help and advice as a Prefect and as Vice Captain. It's been an honor just being asked to fill this position.

The Captains’ Updates By: Kalla and Quiet Bear

As

I look at the impending end of my Captaincy I am overwhelmed with how much has happened over the last twelve months. As of February 7th, 2007, the Grey School has 606 active students. Think about that for a moment. In an age of ever decreasing attention spans, we have managed to hold 606 attention spans by having them do work and like it. The community that surrounds this school is an unceasing marvel to me. We've had our share of growing pains over my Captaincy. In 2006 the site switched to a new server, which caused technological tangles of which I shall not begin to speak. Once the dust had settled we had a new host and some shiny new forums which far outstrip what we had. Utilizing these new capabilities we now have clubs, faculty offices, committees, and chats all in one central place. Over the last year dozens of new classes have been uploaded. Majors and minors are posted in most departments. I used to look at the list of classes and think, “I can't wait to see what comes next,” I now say, “How can I possibly choose?” Now you can look at the course listings and really see where the school is going. While the classes used to only represent levels 1-3, we now see fourth, fifth, and even sixth year classes. All of the potential the Grey School has is beginning to come into fruition; it is a very exciting time. It has been an honor to serve as Captain, but my time is up. I leave you in the capable hands of Quiet Bear and Cashew. See y'all around! Kalla: Stones Lodge Lodge Captain Sodalis Ordinis Erronum

Kalla, it's been good working with you. Good luck in your studies. Quiet Bear

New Captains and Prefects FrogsDancing Introducing your Fifth Scabbard of Prefects and Fourth Mast of Captains, for the period between the Spring and Fall Equinoxes of March 2007 – September 2007: Houses: House Captain: Gero; L2/11c; Healing Major Gnomes Prefect: Wingseeker; L1/13c; ‘Trained’ Salamanders Prefect: (not filled at press time) Sylphs Prefect: Amalthia; L1/11c Undines: Kelwyn; L1/6c Lodges: Lodge Captain: Quiet Bear; L4/13c; Lore Major; ‘Trained’ Lodge Vice Captain: Cashew; L2/3 c; Major pending Flames: Xyaida; L1;14c; ‘Trained’ Stones: Oranstar; L1/11c Waters: Memsev; L1/9c Winds: Talin; L2/1c; Lore Major Your Prefects and Captains have been chosen because of their academic excellence, participation, and attitude. These students devote extra time to study leadership principles and then put their learning into action in helping their respective Houses/Lodges run at the peak of efficiency. It is a position of honor and one of responsibility. Most of all, they're here to help you – so when you have questions of any kind, one of the Prefects or Captains should be the person you go to first. * 'TRAINED' indicates that the Prefects and Captains have completed 'Leadership 101' or 'Leadership 201,' respectively.

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Spring 2007

New Classes Anatomy and Physiology for Herbalists 601: Skin, Muscle and Bone Credits: 3, Year Level: 6+ Department: Wortcunning

The Holy Winter Nights Credits: 2, Year Level: 3 Department: Lifeways

Anima Mundi: The Gaia Hypothesis Credits: 3, Year Level: 6+ Department: Nature Studies

How Sorcery Works Credits: not available at this time Year Level: 2 Department: Dark Arts

Cosmology Internship 101: Introductory Astronomy Credits: 2, Year Level: 1 Department: Cosmology and Metaphysics

Introduction to the Great Work Credits: 2, Year Level: 4 Department: Alchemy and Magickal Sciences Prerequisites: Principles of Alchemy

Dark Stories 601: Werewolves Credits: 1, Year Level: 6 Department: Dark Arts Prerequisites: Children of the Night survey class.

Magick for Job Hunting Credits: 3, Year Level: 6 Department: Lifeways

Defense Against the Dark Arts 601: How to Save the Day Credits 3, Year Level: 6 Department: Dark Arts Prerequisites: Cleansing and Purification and Identifying Psychic Attack

Meet the Indigo Children Credits: 2, Year Level: 4 Department: Mind Magicks

Ethics of Magick 400 Credits: 2, Year Level: 4 Department: Lifeways Prerequisites: Ethics of Magick 100

The Middle Pillar Credits: 2, Year Level: 4 Department: Ceremonial Magick Prerequisites: Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram, and it would be useful if the student had worked on the class dedicated to Ceremonial Magick in the Grimoire for the Apprentice Wizard (pp. 277-283).

Exploring the Sacred/Magickal Landscapes Credits: 2, Year Level: 3 Department: Lore

Nature’s Fury 403: Fire Credits: 3, Year Level: 4 Department: Nature Studies

Five Models of Magick: Magickal Paradigms and Theories of Magickal Causality Credits: 2, Year Level: 2 Department: Wizardry

Personal Prosperity for Wizards Credits: 2, Year Level: 2 Department: Mathemagicks

Gargoyles 101: Introduction Credits: 2, Year Level: 1 Department: Lore Healing Charms and Talismans Credits: not listed at this time Year Level: 4 Department: Healing

Signs and Symbols Credits: 2, Year Level: 3 Department: Magickal Practice Tales of the Fabulists: Storytelling 401 Credits: 2, Year Level: 4 Department: Lore The Terrestrials Credits: 2, Year Level: 3 Department: Cosmology

PROF. LEOPARDDANCER: I'm an April Fool's baby so no one can play tricks on me! 'Course, that in and of itself was a joke on my mother... I wasn't due until mid-late June.

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Spring 2007

2007 Winter Bird Count Wings to a Finish! By Prof. Moonwriter, Dean of Nature Studies Congratulation to the Blazing Buzzards, proud members of the Flames Lodge and winners of the 2006 Winter Bird Challenge! The Buzzards pulled out every stop to win this contest, accomplishing every task to its limits, and then some. When it came to scoring, they had the largest team, the most submitted results, the most photos, and the most passed classes. They secured Audubon donations, represented and publicized the GSW during their Bird Count, and helped the GSW by contributing gourd bird feeders for auction. It was a spectacular effort!

Buzzards' Avatar by Mykael

The strongest possible commendation also goes to the Blazing Buzzards for their emphasis on GSW scholarship at the same time they were in the midst of the Challenge. During the same time that they were excelling on their Bird Count activities, Team Buzzard completed 9 classes and earned 2 Dean’s List appointments, and 1 member moved from L1 to L2.

In second place were the Stones’ Bodacious Burrowing Owls of the Stones Lodge. Working with a team of only 3 members, the Owls made a fantastic showing. Their work yielded two unique achievements: First, they brought in their Lodge ghost-- Lord Richter-- as a team member (and wow—can that guy write!). Second, they created a unique "graphic novel" format for their report, which was a first for a GSW challenge. The Owls’ photography was beautiful and their writing was not only fascinating to read but professional in its quality. In third place: the Winds’ Uncommon Loons, also competing with only 3 flock members. Despite this, they made a great go of the Challenge and did nice work in terms of photography and writing. The Loons deserve special kudos for not giving up when half of their original team went missing—this took real determination, a wonderful trait for apprentice wizards. All in all, it was another wonderful event. Thanks go to Prof. Barrette for coming up with the idea, and thanks to the teams for making it fabulous challenge. Materials from the 2006 and 2007 Bird Count Challenges are being shaped into a series of Birding classes for GSW students. Watch the Departments of Beast Mastery, Divination, and Nature Studies for the classes to appear!

Photo by Aurora Vampira

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Spring 2007

New Award in the Dark Arts FrogsDancing The Dark Arts Honor Society has created the Consortium of Shadows. To enter the First Circle of the Consortium of Shadows, you must first complete one class in each of the three segments of the Major: Defense Against the Dark Arts, Sorcery, and Creatures of the Night. The listings under the Dark Arts Generalist Major and Minor will advise as to what classes belong to each segment. The cross-listed classes from other Departments will count towards achieving this award. If you are uncertain as to whether a class may be counted or as to what segment it belongs under, please contact the Dean of the Dark Arts Department. Youth students must earn at least an 85% in each class and the adult students must earn at least a 95% in each class. To complete the award, one must choose one of the following projects to complete according to your preference and skills: A.) Write a 300 word essay on a Defense topic, such as: Whether hexes or psychic attacks are real The use of shields or wards Any kind of protective symbol OR... Create a protective charm or personalized shield Perform a simple protective spell And then describe the process. You may take and send pictures if appropriate. B.) Write a 300 word essay on a Creature of the Night, OR create a work of art depicting one and send a photograph of it to the Dean. C.) Write a 300 word essay on a form (such as candle magick) or style (such as Hoodoo) of sorcery. OR, perform a low magick spell and describe the process and results. All projects are to be submitted to the Dean of the Department of the Dark Arts. If this cannot be done by email, please contact the Dean to discuss other options for submission. Other Circles may be added to the Consortium of Shadows in the future. This will allow this award to grow as the student body grows and skill levels advance. This will encourage more sophisticated projects to be submitted in the future.

EXTRA! EXTRA!...Class Rings, that is! Grey School class rings are available! They're beautiful silver creations, with the Penkhaduce on either side, and a stone color of your choice -- show off your major, or maybe the elemental color of your House or Lodge! Even Sauron would be jealous. More information can be found in the "Retail Grey Matters" board in the Social Forums, or just click the "Magic Alley" link at the main school site. However -- Headmaster Oberon seems to have some extra rings flying around his study! Here's what he wanted you all to know... "If you (or anyone) would care to return the ring you got, I'll give you credit on it for the next round. Also, I still have a few that weren't picked up (the people never sent the money). Before we place the next order, I'll see how many of the extra ones can be matched with new orders, and get those off first! If anyone's interested, here are the extras I have in-hand (unclaimed or wrong sizes); anyone want to pick them up? The price is ($65 + $6.50 s&h = $71.50). Size 5 11 11 8 10 10 10

Color Yellow Red Silver Blue Blue Grey White

Anyone else want to put a wrong-sized ring up for trade for credit on the next order?"

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Department Focus:

What Is Alchemy? c 2006 S. Aaran Sherwood

Alchemy is the art and science of personal transformation on all levels of being: body, mind and soul. It requires the purest of intent and the ability to apply that intent with singular focus during all phases of the work. It is a meditative and reflective practice that requires extraordinary patience on the part of the practitioner. It

is commonly divided into two components: practical and spiritual. Practical alchemy is the precursor to modern chemistry. It involves working with plants, herbs, minerals and metals in a laboratory setting, often to create tinctures and elixirs. An alchemist who creates such tinctures and elixirs for the purpose of healing is practicing a division of alchemy called spagyrics, which will be the subject of another course. Spiritual alchemy is the science of perfecting the soul. You can perform spiritual alchemy without going into the lab, but you cannot perform practical alchemy without also intentionally performing spiritual alchemy at the same time: for to leave out the spiritual component reduces the alchemical art to mere chemistry and this will not produce the results you are trying to achieve. To the classical alchemist, the lab is the microcosmic representation of the spiritual transformation he/she is working to achieve--like a spell in which you burn something physically to symbolize the Magickal change you wish to effect. Because people are both spiritual and physical beings, it is important to work with both the practical

Alchemists believe that all things carry within them the seed of divinity, and that all things automatically, through the natural course of time, evolve toward their own perfection. Alchemy is a process that expedites the achievement of the inherent perfection in physical and spiritual matter. In other words, an alchemist "assists" nature in manifesting the divine core within the matter with which he/she has chosen to work. In the case of coal, an alchemist would work to bring out the diamond. The alchemist's "job" is to sift the chaff from the grain, the profane from the sacred, the worthless from the priceless, and we often do this by working with those things found in the material world first. By carefully studying nature, we learn about ourselves. We consider gold to be the purest metal, and lead to be the basest. Lead carries within it the potential to become gold. All metals, as all things, are evolving toward perfection. Therefore, when attempting to assist nature in achieving that transformation, rather than trying to garner personal wealth, we are really working to bring about the metal's inherent perfection through a seven-step process of purification; when done in the correct manner, we transform our souls simultaneously. It is this spiritual transformation that is the real goal for those of us involved in the Great Work. It is also this spiritual transformation that ultimately leads to the creation of the Philosopher's Stone. References Hauck, Dennis William. Sorcerer's Stone, 2004 Hauck, Dennis William. The Emerald Tablet, 1999 Melville, Francis. The Book of Alchemy, 2002

and spiritual forms.

Jymi X/0

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April Fools or Bust! By Areeya, Circle of the Standing Stones As I walk through another season on the wheel of the year, I feel it is time once again to reflect and adjust to the shift in spirit as well as the shift in seasons. Finding ourselves amidst Spring after a long Winter seems like a good time to put some thought into how and why the Spring is usually heralded by a need of release. Lets take a look at a couple of release choices. It seems to me that most folks, in my neck of the woods, opt for we what in America like to call ‘Spring Break’ to relieve a bad case of "cabin fever". I feel it generally involves, in equal measure, large groups of people, mellowing libations whenever possible and little common sense. Though a bit extreme, its a valid choice none the less, but probably one of the least healthy choices.

Areeya

In my opinion, I feel conscious reflection and adjustment usually seems the healthier course of action. I like to contemplate my journey through joyous Yule to Imbolc, which is still dark even though we celebrate the rebirth of the light. I feel this time can seem a strange combination of the joy of Light’s slow return, and the bitterness of the grey-seeming time of stillness. The Winter Heart can chill us to the bone, yet can feel comforting and seems as necessary as our dark time in the womb, sheltered and nourished. And so, as we trek through Imbolc, we can spend a lot of time adjusting essential nutrients of spirit for our spring growth. We gestate in the knowledge gained from the womb-like time of stillness and solitude of Winter’s Heart. Imbolc urges us to transform or release the last vestiges of those unnecessary parts of self and consciously fuel our own flames of creation. A time to stoke the flames of rebirth that generate Spring’s growth, by cleansing ourselves anew in the waxing light of the sun. I find Imbolc is urging in a few, or many, cleansing tears and sometimes things seem extremely off balance. The herald of Spring seems to come with accepting loss and release of the old. I like to light candles and incense, and meditate on the growth of the sun. I also feel its good to construct a sacred space in honor of a new season and the death of the old. I remind myself that as we journey past Imbolc and through Ostara, that early stages in our growth cycle can be painful amidst the joy of living. In lighting Imbolc candles I recognize and nurture the waxing sun in the self and fear not the darkness which gives us shelter as we look toward spring. We move onward through Ostara with the early budding of Spring growth. Ostara can give a feel of being discombobulated, as well as hopeful in our new beginnings. Ahh! How the Fool’s energy can help us navigate past uncertainty that sometimes accompanies Spring. The Fool reminds us of the joy in the unknown, and the unconditional love of the universe in which everything is connected. Spring has come and the joy of growth is all around. Can you feel the warming of the heart (and in some parts of the world the warming of the land)? Now seems the time to fertilize and nurture the ground you wish to walk upon while admiring the early buds of opportunity. We can continue to sow more seeds of our intent so that we and the universes may reap a plentiful harvest for heart and hearth. Can you feel the excitement of Ostara’s new growth and the bubbling of light-hearted laughter as we dance into Spring? Can we also feel the Trickster’s haphazard influence of instability? Well have no fear, because April Fool’s is almost here. It's time to travel a Fool’s errand in celebration of the joy of chance with a light heart as Eostre leads us in the merry song of Spring. And, like the Fool, shall we revel in the excitement of new adventures, the will to believe in ourselves and our ability to guide our own spirit. So hop on board the Fool's vehicle of unconditional love and an adventurous spirit: it's April Fool’s or Bust! Of course that's just this writer's opinion. What do you think?

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The World Wide Wizardly Web Part I by Silentfaun

Oh what a wonderful web we weave! And what better way to spend a wet, windy day then surfing the world wide web in a wizardly way. What wonders are to be found! Here then, is a list of fun and fascinating web sites I was lucky enough to come across along my journey, one for each of the school departments. These reviews are, of course, only one humble opinion. There is something for everyone -- a veritable smorgasbord of nifty info...a nibble here, a nibble there...take what you will and leave the rest. Dept. Of Wizardry: http://www.karisgarden.com/cunningfolk/home.htm Here you will find a small but fascinating collection of mini-bios and history regarding some magickal cunningfolk, as well as links for purchasing the books this information was taken from. Dept. Of Nature Studies: http://www.pbs.org/americanfieldguide/ An incredibly educational and entertaining site containing rebroadcast nature programs from nearly 30 different PBS stations in both Real Media and Windows Media format. Dept. Of Magickal Practice: http://dragonseyecircle.org/magickal_correspondances.htm Here’s a nifty little find. A simple collection of magickal correspondence tables including planetary hours, incense, elements, colors and more. Not a huge collection, but useful. Dept. Of Mind Magicks: http://www.meditationcenter.com/ A very helpful guide on various meditation techniques. Clearly written, step-by-step instructions makes this site useful for the experienced, as well as novice meditation practitioner. Dept. Of Healing: http://www.naturalbloom.com/ There’s some very good information on a variety of alternative medicines on this site, as well as a large list of practitioners and associations. Just need to remember to scroll down each page. Dept. Of Wortcunning: http://www.illustratedherbal.com/ I adore this site. A wonderfully organized illustrated herbal encyclopedia with concise, clear information, preparations, a glossary of terms, and more. Lovely. Dept. Of Divination: http://www.uponreflection.co.uk/runeworld/index.htm Both fun and informative, this site contains a lot of information on runes, including history, associations, divination and encryption. An interactive oracle adds to the fun. Tyrssen

Dept. Of Performance Magick : http://www.ultimatemagic.com/ The real treasure of this site is to be found in the library, which has a large amount of conjury techniques listed by type and skill level. I would, however, suggest turning down the volume.

Stay tuned for our next issue, when the next 8 departments are covered.

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TIGER'S MOONDIVA: I enjoy AFD in an atmosphere where everyone is playing. When everyone understands a joke is a joke when all thinks its funny instead of an excuse for picking on someone. (Let's face it, those who just want to pick on someone don't need an excuse - they are going to do it anytime.) This I learned from years of being the butt of the joke for a very long time. Those fools are just as likely to be mean at Christmas. At the end if ALL are laughing though I say enjoy!

Keepsake Painted Eggs By Aurora Vampira; special to WGM A great way to preserve your memories of this spring is with keepsake painted eggs. They are hollowed-out eggs on which a small springtime scene is painted. These last forever (as long as they aren’t dropped!) and make lovely decorations. You will need: Raw egg(s) Large carpet or embroidery needle (a slender ice pick or awl will also work) Small bowl Paper towels Carbon paper (optional) Something suitable as a palette Water cup for paint (like a clean butter tub) Assorted acrylic craft paints Assorted fine hairbrushes (size 1 down to 5/0 or smaller) Matte spray finish First, select an egg that has no bumps or other flaws. Hold it over the bowl and use the needle to poke a small hole in the narrow end of the egg. Poke a slightly larger hole (about 1⁄4 in. diameter) on the other side. Insert the needle and “scramble” the yolk from the inside so the membranes break and it’s easier to remove. Holding the egg over the bowl, blow into the smaller hole hard to remove the contents. You can also ease the liquid out using the needle. Rinse the inside of the egg so you are sure it’s clean, then set the egg out to dry. Now it’s time for the creative part! Paint anything with a spring theme: flowers, birds, rabbits, butterflies, faeries, all sorts of things! It can be as simple or as detailed as you want. You can use carbon paper to trace a design from magazines or the Internet. Or you can paint freehand, which is a lot easier to do if you do a pencil outline. Then take out your paints, palette, and water cup and get to work! If necessary, cut down your paintbrush to only a few hairs, to accommodate detail. Thin the paints with water too; mine turned out very thick and rough because I didn’t. Remember to let each design dry completely before moving on to the next one. When your masterpiece is done, use matte spray finish and put the egg on display out of reach from small children. Other Tips: If you make a mistake and the paint is still wet, take a damp paper towel and carefully wipe off the excess paint. A napkin ring makes a perfect holder for your finished egg.

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Spoof or scam? Hoax or jokes? The fool’s on you! By Prof. Moonwriter, April Fool Which of the following were actual news stories? In 1998, the Alabama legislature voted to change the common value of the mathematical constant known as ‘pi’ to a more easily understandable and Biblically relevant 3.0. In 1997, the cartoon “Screwy the Squirrel” held the Cartoon Network at nut-point and ran a daylong television cartoon takeover. In 1998, Burger King revealed its new left-handed Whopper, designed so that condiments would drip out the right side, instead of the usual left. Each of these stories appeared in the local news media…. On April Fool’s Day! That’s right—April first, famous date of pranks, ruses, and misdeeds, hopefully all in good fun. Alabama’s attempt to redefine pi—led by “New Mexicans for Science and Reason,” played off a vignette from Robert Heinlein’s 1961 sci-fi classic, Stranger in a Strange Land, yielding up a great math hoax and an outstanding pop culture reference in one fell swoop. The science world traditionally has a lot of fun with April Fools. On April 1, 1976, BBC Radio featured a piece by astronomer Sir Patrick Moore, who told listeners that an upcoming rare planetary alignment would momentarily alter gravity at precisely 9:47 am. At his heeding, dozens of listeners jumped into the air at 9:47 am, then phoned in to explain that they had experienced “strange floating sensations”! On April 1, 2005, an online piece from NASA purported to show “water on Mars.” Readers who clicked the link were whisked to an image of a Mars candy bar, with a glass of water perched atop. (Of course now there’s evidence of actual water on Mars—but this was still pretty cute.) A recurrent April Fool piece— surfacing in different countries every few years—suggests that our existing timekeeping will be changed to a metric-based system functioning on powers of 10. Six to the second power o’clock, anyone? The natural world isn’t immune to hoaxology. In 1957, the BBC television program Panorama showed a news clip of the Swiss harvesting spaghetti from trees. Believe it or not, people contacted the BBC wanting to know how to find and grow their own spaghetti trees. This ruse holds up as one of the most successful TV hoaxes of all time. The US government has taken its own liberties with April Fools Day. On April 1, 1996, a full-page ad in The New York Times carried Taco Bell’s announcement that they’d purchased the Liberty Bell, renaming it the "Taco Liberty Bell." Allegedly the purchase was aimed at ameliorating a bit of national debt, but the public outcry was swift and huge. A similar rumor said that the Lincoln Memorial had been sold to an automobile maker; via the sponsor relationship, the monument would thereafter be called the Ford Lincoln Mercury Memorial. And just in time to help us deal with global warming: On April 1, 2006, Norwegian media ran a story about "rain drop power,” suggesting that rain could be harvested and used to turn tiny turbines, generating enough power to supplant oil as a primary energy source. Check your newspaper on April 1…. Who knows what you’ll find? Source Cited “April Fool.” Wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/April_fool. March 2007.

Illustration by Aurora Vampira

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Spring 2007

New Classes (Continued) COSMOTOLOLOGY Department: Wizardry Level: 1 and 3/4 Credits: 2

ELEMENTARINESS Department: Nature Studies Level: 4.4 Credits: 4

As all modern wizards know, no one will take your powers seriously unless you look like you have just stepped off a Lord of the Rings set. This class will teach you to "dress the part" -- an array of makeup and hair products will be discussed, with special emphasis on dramatic highlights and advanced beardology. Wardrobe and accessories be covered in the second half of the class. Photos will be required, so you must have access to a digital camera, a props department, and a complete set of theatrical backdrops. Each student will need to furnish 1 bolt of velvet fabric (black or deep purple preferred), glitter, several yards of metallic cording, and either an owl, ferret, or peregrine falcon. Extra credit will be given to those who obtain a pyrotechnician's license while enrolled in the class.

The study of the four elements is a key to all kinds of magickal practice, but the usual sedate approaches quickly become tiresome. In this class, you'll experience the elements under conditions best described as "thrilling" and "ultimate." Imagine creating a dreamcatcher while base-jumping, or working candle magick in the maw of an active volcano, and you'll have an idea of the challenges that await you in this fun little class.

THE DAILY CHALLENGE Department: Lifeways Level: 364 Credits: Merit-based A wizard never lets his or her guard down, even for a moment, and this includes one's readiness to respond to each and every challenge posted on the GSW forums. This class will help you learn to be ready for any challenge, any time, and in any dimension. In the technomagick aspect of the course, you'll learn to design and enable challenge-bots to Photo by Filia Chironis patrol the forums and keep The Grey School you informed of every new Sorting Stick challenge posting. You'll explore the use of cloaking devices to increase your success by obscuring challenges once you have completed them. Performance-enhancing magicks will also be studied and evaluated. Extra credit will be given to those who perfect advanced techniques such as the "swoop and snipe" and the "swish and swipe."

DEFENSIVE BACK-WATCHING Department: Dark Arts Level: 23 [required] Credits: 5.65 Wizard apprentices always need opportunities to test their defensor skills. In this required class, specially hired Grey School Troll-thugs will test your mettle by stalking you throughout an unannounced 24-hour period, ensuring you're prepared to deal with just about anything. Testing is open-book and takes place in cyber- and realspace. As the test period is unannounced, begin watching your back immediately after registering. It is recommended that a Healing course be taken in conjunction with this class. JUGGLING Department: Performance Magicks Level: 13 Credits: 1 per successfully juggled item Wizards must not only be entertaining, but are required to keep a lot of balls in the air at all times -- literally! Grey School is proud to offer the first text-based juggling class in Internet history. Students begin with small, lightweight beanbags, gradually increasing the number and difficulty of items to be kept aloft. For the final exam, students will need to obtain a flame-retardant smock and at least three chainsaws.

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An Interview with Lord Richter By: FrogsDancing FD: Who was Lord Richter? LR:Sorry, did you say who WAS Lord Richter? I was of the impression that I still exist, albeit in a somewhat less corporeal form… FD: My sincerest apologies, would you please continue and share your story? LR:I was born William Edward Richter III on May 8, 1794 in Newcastle, in the county of Durham, England. In life, I was a hewer at the Springwell colliery. I died in a mine explosion the day after my birthday in 1833. I was hewing away at the coal in the B pit, when I saw a glimmer out of the corner of my eye and turned to look, thinking it might be a diamond. Much to my horror, the glimmer I had seen came from the belt buckle of a right foul old gnome who was guarding the mine. I tried to warn the lads in the pit that we should leave, but they were all so hopelessly mundane, not a single one of them saw him or believed me. Normally, gnomes will just chase you out, but this one became quite angry that we refused to leave. He snapped his chubby little fingers, producing the spark that set off the explosion. We were buried alive. FD: How long have you been at GSW? LR: I arrived at the Grey School late last October. FD: How did you find out about GSW? LR: The school was suggested to me by the A.A.A. (Alliance of Academic Apparitions) FD: What do you envision for GSW’s future? LR: The future of this school lies in the hands of its administration, teachers and students. It will become whatever you make of it. FD: Why did you choose Yule to announce your presence? LR: Introducing myself on Samhain would have been far too ordinary. Who doesn't expect to see an apparition when the veil between the worlds is thinnest? I wanted to come in with more of a bang -- rather like the way I went out! FD: Are you aware of any more GSW ghosts? LR: I believe there might be one or two others who are interested in roaming the school's halls, yes. We can't just show up, you know. The Headmaster and the DADA club have wards set around the school. The Administration makes a thorough examination of our energy before opening the doors to us.

Questions from the Student Body: Tyrssen of the Winds Lodge wants to know: Do you have any special reason for haunting the GSW? (We are delighted to have you here of course!) LR: Honestly, the word haunting has such a negative connotation to it. Couldn't we say I'm visiting? Far friendlier, wouldn't you say? But, alas, I digress…I believe I answered this question earlier; the A.A.A. recommended the Grey School to me. I tried visiting Oxford for awhile, but no one there sensed or saw me. I loved the libraries, but the lack of conversation grew tiresome. I decided to inquire with the Alliance about any magickal schools that might welcome a disembodied chap such as myself. T: Do you have any special news, warnings or messages from beyond that you would like to pass on to the ectoplasmically-challenged folks? LR: At the moment, nothing you spiffing apprentices couldn't ascertain on your own with but a little effort. Prof. Moonwriter of the Stones Lodge wants to know: With 16 different departments to haunt in the GSW, which is you favorite? Why? LR: I suppose it would be the department of Magickal Practice. It reminds me of all the wonder magick brought into my life when I was alive. Things are more instantaneous on this side of the veil. You don't need spells here. Why, you barely think it and Bob's your uncle! Shame, really. Spells were jolly good fun. I do miss the sense of power I felt casting with a swish and a flick of my wand… MW: Do you have any hobbies? (Other than birding of course!) LR: My next two favourite activities are taking long strolls with my wife, Margaret, on our estate in the Summerland and chess. MW: Do ghosts eat? LR: Yes, but not in the same way people do. As I'm sure you already know, everything in existence is a form of energy--including food. We consume energy that isn't as dense as your food is, and we don't consume it in the same fashion. Continued Next Page...

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Xyaida of the Flames Lodge wants to know: How did you become a Lord? LR: I received the title posthumously actually. Springwell's owner, the Right Hon. Lord Ravensworth, felt so guilty about the mysterious explosion and about being unable to give us all a proper burial, that he bequeathed to each of us the title "Lord of the Mine" and granted us part ownership of the pit in which we died. Honorable as his intentions may have been, the gesture certainly wasn't going to do the lot of us any good since we were deceased. Nevertheless, since my life was stripped from me when I was still in my prime, I feel I've earned the title.

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X: What is your favorite book? LR: I am a strong proponent for Shakespeare's work on multiple levels, both literary and magickal. X: Did you practice magick while you were alive? LR: Indeed, I did. FD: Thank you, Lord Richter for taking time out of your busy schedule for this interview. I know that the student body has been very curious about you since you announced your arrival and your participation in the Christmas Bird Count.

Virtual Wizardry (April Fools or the Real Deal?) By Belenus, the Gold – Society of the Four Winds

A fascinating twist on Wizardly work dawned on me last year. It is funny that I was pondering this early in the day, and happened to pick up a free copy of a Wiccan magazine later that day, which had an article that helped validate my suspicions. The idea is that for some people, not only does it make sense to tailor magickal rituals and spells to one's individual skills and talents, but that for some, especially at certain times and in certain situations, tools such as athames, wands, and such, that help in rituals and spell working, can be substituted for, using only visualization and energy work or astral manifestation. In other words, the tools, while being very helpful for most Wizards, are not always available or must haves. Wizards can, for example, imagine that they are holding an athame when casting their magick circle. I have found for myself, that having the tools when convenient, is helpful and fun, but as I once told my friend, when I walk out the front door, I cannot, for example, bring my Wizard's staff with me (unless its Halloween or I'm going hiking). I have found, though, that I can very easily visualize and even feel the presence and power of my staff if I make the effort to. I can take the staff with me virtually. Having worked with the staff in rituals and charged it with my energy, I have a psychic connection with it, and this makes it easier to call upon it when needed. Finally, I have often had great success with raising magical energy by just "winging it," using my own words and rituals. In this way, I have contributed to the recovery of persons who have asked for healing and even some who didn't know that I worked on their behalf. I find, for myself, a combination of prayer, Wiccan ritual, personal and/or established words and chants of power not only manifest my intentions, but help me psychologically and spiritually. It seems that my magickal work can not only tip the scales outwardly, but is quite cathartic for me at the same time.

PROF: MOONWRITER: I see April Fool’s as a time to stop being serious and have a little fun—and it certainly doesn’t have to feel “mean.” Ask my kids about what I used to do to their sack lunches on AFD! Crisco in your Oreo cookies anyone? Peanut butter and stiff fruit leather sandwiches? Pancakes made of a circle of white flannel dipped in batter and fried to a nice golden brown? (hee hee…)

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Fun Facts About April Fool’s Day By Prof. Moonwriter, Stones Lodge Although its origins are uncertain, April Fool’s Day (AFD) probably is linked to the vernal equinox, and the revelry and celebration that have always accompanied the return of spring. American writer Mark Twain once said of April 1st: “This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three-hundred and sixty-four." In the United States, people use AFD as a chance to play jokes and pranks on their friends and family members. Famous examples: the short-sheeted bed, the vaselined toilet seat, or the infamous invisible saran wrap stretched over the drinking glass, edges neatly trimmed away. In Scotland, AFD is known as "hunting the gowk," (the cuckoo) and victims of jokes are known as "Aprilgowks,” literally, April cuckoos. In France, the fool-ee is known as poisson d'avril, literally, “the April fish.” This may be because in April, the sun exits Pisces, the zodiacal sun-sign of the fish. Today’s French people use AFD as a time to play jokes, particularly sneaking a paper fish onto the backs of hapless victims! The Dutch people mark April 1 for its national history. On 1 April, 1572, while the Netherlands were under Spanish rule, a rebel band known as the Geuzen seized the coastal town of Den Briel, and event that led to a civil war or uprising against the Spanish rulers. According to Wikipedia, “The Duke of Alba, commander of the Spanish army could not prevent the uprising. Bril is the Dutch word for glasses, so … ‘Alba lost his glasses’. Dutch people find this joke hilarious [and] still commemorate the first of April.” (Note from author: This joke is lost on me, but I’m guessing you had to be there.) Geoffrey Chaucer is known for his Canterbury Tales (c. 1400 ce). One, “The Nun's Priest's Tale,” involves the story of two fools: Chanticleer and the Fox. On AFD, “hoax-stories” appear in newspapers and on television, Internet, etc. Although these can be quite clever, they have often caused people to disbelieve true stories that happened to fall on April 1, such as the Aleutian tidal wave and tsunami of April 1, 1946 (165 deaths), the 2004 launch of Google’s new ‘Gmail’ service, or the 1976 launch of Apple Computer. Sources: (No author) “April Fool’s Day.” Wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/April_fool. March 1, 2007.

DINDRAINE: Honestly, I've never paid much mind to April Fools' Day. When I was younger, my older brother would pick on me on that day with the excuse of AFD, but like anyone, he just picked on me year round anyway It just sticks out as a dumb holiday to me, much for the same reason as Korerhi. People do really mean things just for the sake of April Fools' Day. They also tend to do really stupid things. Every year, the fire drill gets pulled at my high school. Every year, there's a stink bomb that goes off and even the person who set it regrets it later because the stench just fills the entire school. And every year, there're people who are picked on and torn to pieces just because "they have the right as a participant on April Fools' Day". I admit, though, that there can be some lighter details to it. People do tend to be a bit more laid back, and some people know how to have a good time with this day. I just don't take part in it myself.

Aurora Borealis By Wingseeker

As the full moon rises over the tall trees of pine, And the crater rabbit hops across the lunar shine, Lights of blue, red, green, orange, and yellow fly In acrobatic moves throughout the midnight sky. It is colored balls, tossed by jugglers, to and fro With skill and concentration that only masters know. It gives off an energy that ebbs and flows And fills me with excitement that comes and goes. And this beauty of a light show of balas Is known as the Aurora Borealis.

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Spring 2007

PantheaCon 2007: One Wild Weekend by Filia Chironis

What can I say to you all except that you missed one heck of a party! Over President’s Day weekend I was lucky enough to attend one of the largest annual pagan conventions in the country -- and the only one on the West Coast. Although, in my opinion, you never need a reason to visit the San Francisco Bay Area, this convention can certainly give you the time frame to plan your visit! When I wasn’t being dazzled by longsword dances, I was scrying with Enochian Magick. Not only did I meet our esteemed Headmaster, but I also learned that some believe he has a resemblance to Elvis! But I am getting ahead of myself here… PantheaCon 2007 was hosted by Ancient Ways Books, located in Oakland, California. This year marked the lucky Estara T’shirai, Brighid Delphinos, Headmaster Oberon, and 13th anniversary of the convention and the theme was, Headmistress Morning Glory Photo by Filia Chironis appropriately the Magic of 13 and Hecate. PantheaCon had something for everyone- truly! Some of the traditions represented included African Diaspora, Ceremonial, Chaos Magick, Dianic, Egyptian, Feri and Faery, Discordian, Asatru, Hellenic, Wiccan and more Druid and Shamanic groups than you could shake a stick at. There were arts and crafts, family and children centered activities, workshops on divination, healing, gods, goddesses, and history. There were countless rituals and performances as well. In other words, I can’t even begin to convey to you what the event was like. However, I shall shoulder the burden and try. One of my greatest anxieties about going to PantheaCon was meeting our Headmaster, Oberon. He is a legend among magicians and I was unsure what to expect. Seeing pictures of him has always summoned an image of a man who is a cross between Rowling’s Dumbledore and Tolkien’s Gandalf. Maybe it’s the hat… Well, as is wont to happen in magick, a coincidence quickly stripped me of my anxiety. As I was waiting in line to register for my hotel room, a familiar-looking man caught my eye. He looked like Oberon but he was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, so it was hard to tell. Okay, admittedly the t-shirt said Grey School and his nametag said 'Oberon', but one should never jump to conclusions. So I waited until he got directly behind me in line and was greeted by someone else before I introduced myself. As it turns out, Oberon and Morning Glory (whom I was lucky enough to meet later, at their Mythic Images’ booth) are two of the kindest people you will ever meet. It seemed that everyone knew who they were and wanted to talk with them, share news, and get their opinions on rituals and magickal problems. And I never saw them without a smile. How they summoned all that energy is beyond me! It must have been magick… Although I have lived in the Bay Area for seven years now, this was my first time at PantheaCon. To be honest, I am more comfortable typing away at my computer than navigating through large groups of people. However, when Professor Felidae posted asking for help with the hospitality suite I figured it sounded like fun and jumped right in. Not only did GSW have an official panel and the hospitality suite, but we also made our presence known through flyers, an official display, and the sale of all four of our school’s books at the Mythic Images’ booth. On Friday, I was lucky enough to attend the “Basics of Shielding” workshop given by Professor Estara T’shirai and the “My Magic is Not Your Religion” lecture given by Professor Morgan Felidae. On Saturday evening faculty and staff from our school held a panel to talk about the school and answer people’s questions. It was during this presentation when I first met Professor Brighid Delphinos and Brian Ewing, the school’s attorney and a member of our Board of Directors. As you can imagine, much of what was discussed during the panel was not new to me. However, I did glean some information of interest. Headmaster Oberon discussed in detail his vision of the school and how it had been forming in his mind for many years before the Harry Potter sensation took hold. Rowling’s popularity provided him with the platform necessary to bring his dream to fruition. I also learned a lot about our school’s continuing efforts to be classified as a tax exempt organization. Plus, we recruited four new students! So, having read all the way to the end of this article, I feel that you deserve a reward for your effort. Oberon and Elvis. Well, apparently someone was overheard saying that Oberon looked like “Elvis Dumbledore”. It was probably just a mistranslation among the chaos of the Photo by Filia Chironis convention but if you ever meet him, you should be sure to take a good hard look, just in case.

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Robert Anton Wilson Has Left the Building An elegy for one of the great modern Wizards By Elizabeth Barrette, Dean of Students, special to Whispering Grey Matters Robert Anton Wilson was one of the great Wizards of modern time. He wrote dozens of books, both nonfiction and fiction -- most famously the Illuminati novels and the personal-evolution guide, Prometheus Rising. His interests included various types of science and magic, but it all tended to cluster around two things: figuring out how the world works, and how the human mind works. His findings remain tremendously valuable to anyone interested in shaping internal or external realities. He also followed the works of other modern Wizards; he worked with Timothy Leary to promote futurist ideals, and he was a water-brother of Oberon Zell-Ravenheart. Read more on Robert Anton Wilson's homepage at www.rawilson.com/main.shtml or at: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Anton_Wilson

Sketch by Jymi X/0

***

1932-NEVER -- in memory of Robert Anton Wilson By Elizabeth Barrette Once upon a time there was a man who questioned everything. He liked to bang science and magic together, The way small boys bang the ends of jumper cables To watch the sparks fly. He illuminated literature, Triggered the cosmos, Mixed felines with particle physics, And moved through more reality tunnels Than a spelunker in Mammoth Cave. He explained how the human mind works, And how to reprogram it if you want to. You are not allowed to laugh at the exercises Until you have tried them. 23. 17. Synchronicity. Never mind a moment of silence Raise a glass, steal fire, pester someone important That's the way to make a proper memorial To the man who knew he was immortal, Even if his body wasn't.

Not believing in anything -not disbelieving in anything. That may be one of the most important of the ideas in my books.

-- Robert Anton Wilson

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QUANTUM PHYSICS AND MAGIC PART II: SURFING THE WAVE FUNCTIONS -- Jymi X/0

"[T]he atoms or elementary particles themselves are not real; they form a world of potentialities or possibilities rather than one of things or facts." -- Werner Heisenberg "Observations not only disturb what is to be measured, they produce it." -- Pascual Jordan “Something unknown is doing we don't know what.” -- Sir Arthur Eddington We know the difference between a particle and a wave. A particle is an object – you could pick it up and move it somewhere else. A wave could be described as a band of compressed energy that moves through a medium, such as water or air, in response to a disturbance in that medium (like throwing a particle into it). These two categories would seem to be mutually exclusive: something can't be both a particle and a wave...right? Let me back up a little. In Philosophy, the more extreme Empiricists say that nothing exists unless it's being perceived by someone. In other words, when you leave your house and elsewhere, your house, and anyone you leave in it, ceases to exist (except as an abstract idea in your mind) until you return (or choose to perceive yourself returning). At that point, your expectations of finding your house exactly where you left it causes you to observe that certain reality, bringing your house and family back into existence while you're there. Sounds silly, doesn't it? However, this is an illustration of the magical rule of “Acting in Accordance:” after casting a spell, act like it's already worked. If you can This attunes your personal energy frequency with that of the reality (or one of them) in which your goal has been realized. Some beliefs, such as the idea that your house won't go away when you do, are so ingrained that we don't have to work at them; we just take them for granted. (Of course, this doesn't always protect us from unexpected changes, but paradoxically, we also expect to be surprised now and then throughout our lives...!) This is called “collapsing a wave function”. See, atoms – of which “stuff” is composed – are, when broken down to their own constituent pieces, really nothing more than energy. What's energy? In physics, it's an ability to do work: the power to cause a change. In the last issue, I talked about electrons as potential: until you observe them and make a measurement, they can and do exist anywhere within their orbital shells as waves of energy: potential. It's almost as if the electron is everywhere at once, until someone collapses the wave function by observing it, which forces it into one particular location, where it becomes a particle. Our large-scale reality is very similar (seeing as how it's composed of these weird small-scale realities). Nothing is really “true” for you until you've experienced it for yourself, and your expectations have a lot to do with how your experiences turn out. When you cast a spell, the more you can get yourself to truly expect a successful result, the higher the probability that the wave function of the particles involved will collapse in your favor. At the time of this writing, there is a terrific discussion about just this sort of thing going on in the “General Chatter” section of the Grey School forums. Members, head over to to read more!

NEXT ISSUE: SHEDDING SOME LIGHT ON THE SUBJECT OF TIME REFERENCE: "George Berkely." Wikipedia. 24 March, 2007. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc. 27 February, 2007.

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Spring 2007

The Mysteries of Hibernation: Winter’s Trickster By Susan “Moonwriter” Pesznecker For those of us in the northern hemisphere, January and February bring long, cold, dark nights and short, dim days. It’s a time of quiet reflection and hunkering down: a time to hibernate.

Berlin Zoologischer Garten. July 2005 Photo by: Eloquence

The words hibernate and hibernation come from the Latin hiberna, “winter quarters.” When a plant or animal spends the winter in a dormant state, it is said to hibernate. Hibernation conserves energy and helps animals live through a time when cold and lack of available food would otherwise make survival difficult.

Hibernating plants are all around us. With cooler autumn weather and shortened daylight hours, growth slows, trees drop their leaves, and plants cease flowering. Perennials lose their foliage, while annual plants “die back,” their aerial parts withering and only their roots left to sustain the plant’s energy through the winter. Hibernating animals are harder to spot; most of us will never see one. (And please don’t go looking for them! It’s dangerous to disturb a hibernating animal; noise and vibration from snowmobiles are particularly likely to awaken dormant animals, often leading to their death.) Hibernating creatures sink into a state of regulated hypothermia for a period of weeks to months, their core temperature, pulse, respiration, and metabolic rate dropping well below “normal.” Their need for food also diminishes, and they live off of stored fat. Most animals hibernate in “bouts,” awakening periodically to move about and find food before returning to their dormant state. Among hibernators are bats, marsupials, ground squirrels, rattlesnakes, and bears. The bear’s hibernation is less intense than that of other animals and is sometimes referred to as “denning.” Birds don’t actually hibernate but during cold weather may drift into day-long periods of reduced activity and metabolism known as “torpor.” Growth and development mostly cease during all kinds hibernation; however some animals—like the bear—give birth and nurse young throughout the months spent in hiberna. What about humans—do they hibernate, too? When the air grows cold and days shorten, levels of serotonin and melatonin shift within the brain, leading to changes in mood and energy levels. In millennia past, humans responded to these winter changes by retreating to cave or hearth and embracing the darkness. But in modern times, the realities of seasonal change have been camouflaged by “modern advances,” including central heating, incandescent lights, and the ability to eat fresh strawberries in January. Seasonal Affective Disorder is a human disorder that strikes during the winter and is characterized by depression and a lack of energy. It’s tempting to think that SAD may result from our failure to observe the turning of the seasonal wheel—our failure to hibernate. Today SAD is treated with exposure to full-spectrum light and sometimes with antidepressants; but perhaps if we lit a fire, turned down the lights, settled down with a good book, and embraced the months of dark winter nights, we might also find some relief. Woodchuck Tongue Twister Riddle By: FrogsDancing In honor of Puxatawny Phil, Pennsylvania’s most famous groundhog/woodchuck. In memoriam of Grand pop Happ, who taught it to me in between escapades that included the use of rubber vomit and plastic dog poop. Most of us are familiar with the question: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Here is the answer: A woodchuck would chuck, as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

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Holiday Lore by FrogsDancing

Ostara (OH-stare-ah or Oh-STAR-a) March 20-23 in the Northern Hemisphere. September 20-23 in the Southern Hemisphere.

plans and goals are common at this time. It is also a good time to free oneself from anything that may be holding you back and/or preventing your own personal growth. The egg is a very popular and common symbol of this celebration. It represents life and is seen as a symbol of rebirth. Many see and use it as a powerful charm or talisman. The bunny is another popular and common symbol of this celebration. It can represent fertility and vitality. It is often the first animal to give birth in the spring. Bunnies are also thought to be docile and gentle. Many believe that an image of a bunny may be seen in the moon’s face. Source List: “The Wiccan Sabbat Ostara” http://www.beginnerwicca.com/ostara.htm “Ostara History Lore Traditions and Customs presented by Crystal Forest” http://www.crystalforest3.homestead.com/Ostarahistory.html “Wiccan Ostara Spring Equinox” http://www.magicspells.in/ostara_spring_equinox.htm

April

Areeya

It is traditionally celebrated or observed on the 21 st of the month appropriate to your hemisphere. It may also be known as Lady Day; Spring or Vernal Equinox; Eostre and Alban Eiler. It is a time when night and day are in perfect balance. The Light is gaining strength, as the days are now growing longer. Our ancestors believed it to be the start of the new year. The astrological year begins again at this time of the year. It is both, fertility and a resurrection celebration. Spring is born, bringing with it new growth and newly born creatures. All, that at one time looked dead, seems reborn, or awakened with new life. Christian missionaries adopted the German pagans’ spring festival to become the Easter celebration that we are all familiar with. Easter is always celebrated on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the equinox. It reveals its pagan origins in this manner. Rituals for renewal in ourselves, thoughts, dreams,

Fools’ Day: April Fools’ Day is a celebration of mischief and silliness. It is a day when one is free from the seriousness and piety of daily life. It is a day to play with truth and illusion, being able to exchange one for the other. It is a time where action truly is the ritual and celebration. Have you ever asked yourself where did it begin? Everything needs to have a beginning. There are some that believe that this day of pranks and mischief may actually be related to the arrival of spring. Nature often “fools” with men, with its capricious weather changes during this time. Another theory that has a following is that it may honor the rook’s futile mission to find land after it set off from Noah’s flood stranded ark. Perhaps the Romans deserve the credit with their end of winter celebration of Hilaria. Gotham, a legendary town of fools in Nottinghamshire England, may also lay claim to the start of this holiday. It seems that at one time the villagers did not want to lose their main road to King John in the 13th century. They closed their road to him and would not let him in. Soldiers were sent by the King to investigate. They found a town full of lunatics. King John left the town alone. April Fools’ Day can be seen as their victory celebration. Continued Next Page...

Whispering Grey Matters

The leading theory is that it began in or around 1582 when Pope Gregory had the Gregorian calendar replace the Julian calendar. The Gregorian calendar moved the New Year to January 1. With the Julian calendar, the New Year had been celebrated around April 1. Many people simply forgot the change at first. When they tried to celebrate the New Year on April 1st, they were then teased as April Fools. Did you know that the pranking period ends at noon? It is said that any jokes/pranks attempted or committed after that time will cause bad luck to the perpetrator. Here is a little rhyme for that trickster whom did not keep track of the time: “April Fools’ Day is past and gone. You’re the fool and I am none.” Source List: Urban Legends Reference Pages: April Fools’ Day Origins April Fools’ Day Origins http://www.snopes.com/holidays/aprilfools/origins.asp Woodlands Junior School Facts about the Month of April Month by Month Calendar of British Festivals and Special Events http://www.woodlandsJunior.kent.sch.uk/customs/year/april.htm

Imbolc (IM-bulk or EM-bowlk) February 2 – Northern Hemisphere August 1 – Southern Hemisphere Also known as: Oimelc; Groundhog’s Day; St. Brigid’s Day; Candlemas Imbolc literally means “in the belly.” At this time of the year the earth or land is still partially asleep. Within the belly of the Mother (earth) the first very faint stirrings of new life are beginning. Oimlec, literally means “ewes milk.” It may be seen as the festival of the lactating sheep. In the days of our ancestors, the herd animals were believed to have the ‘milk of life’ flowing in their teats and udders. The animals had either given birth to their first offspring of the New Year or their wombs were full and swollen with new life just waiting to be born. This festival occurs at the mid-point between Yule and Ostara. It is the center of the dark half of the

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year. Our ancestors often checked their winter provisions at this time. They wanted to be sure that they were only about half way through their supplies. Weather divination, blessing of the crop seeds and the consecrating of agricultural tools are common activities of the day. Spring cleaning may begin for the mind, body and of course the spirit. Brighid, herself was believed to walk the earth on Imbolc eve. It is a time of transformation. The goddess transforms from the Crone to the Maiden. Light is beginning to show in the darkness. The rekindled fires both within and without now become the personification of the new born God’s growing strength. The Maiden is often shown with a broom at this time. She is said to be sweeping away the old and dead season, preparing for her new growth and renewal. We can also use this time to sweep away the old, outdated and just plain useless from our lives. We are then ready, like the Maiden, to receive new ideas and begin to make new plans and goals for ourselves. Imbolc is a fire festival it celebrates the hearth and home. It also celebrates the lengthening days, and any or all signs of an early spring. Deities of Imbolc: All of the Virgin/Maiden Goddesses: Brighid, Athena, Gaia; The Gods of Love and Fertility – Eros; Februus What Imbolc symbolizes: Purity, Renewal, Fertility Symbols: Besoms (brooms), Brighid’s Crosses, Priapic Wands, Lit candles, Ploughs Herbs: Any/All White and Yellow flowers; Angelica; Iris; Violets Foods: Any/All seeds, Dairy products (especially milk) Incense: Basil, Cinnamon, Myrrh Colors: Pink, Red, White, Yellow Stones: Garnet, Ruby, Bloodstone, Turquoise Activities: Candle lighting, Bonfires, Decorating and Consecrating Agricultural Equipment and Seeds, Making Bride’s Beds Source List: “Celtic Lore and Magic” – Celebrate Imbolc (or Imbolg) http://www.celticloreandmagic.com/holidays/imbolc.htm About Oimlec http://www.ladyofthehearth.com/sabbats/about-oimlec.txt Wiccan, Pagan and Witchcraft Holidays; Imbolc Lore Imbolc by Akasha http://www.wicca.com/celtic/akasha/imbolclore.htm Imbolc – Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imbolc

Continued Next Page...

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Spring 2007

Groundhog Day: Our ancestors once believed that the hibernating creatures they knew were able to predict the arrival of spring. Our ancestors believed that the appearance of these animals from their winter beds announced the coming of spring. The Pennsylvania Dutch, a branch of German immigrants, brought this tradition to America. The badger was the first animal they used in their spring weather predictions. The groundhog or woodchuck, as it is also known, eventually took over the job. Badgers and groundhogs were not the only critters that have been monitored for their prediction of spring’s arrival. Hedgehogs, bears and any other animals that hibernate are believed to have had the ability to predict, for our ancestors, when spring had finally arrived. Traditionally, this day is a day of weather divination. The groundhog is believed to awaken on February 2nd. It then leaves its burrow. Now, if the groundhog sees its shadow, it returns to its burrow for some more sleep. It knows that there will be at least six more weeks of winter. On the other hand, if its shadow does not appear, the groundhog is not frightened and remains outside as spring has arrived early. Punxsutawney Phil, Pennsylvania’s most famous groundhog, is the official U.S. groundhog and spring diviner. Phil foretold an early spring this year. Source List: Groundhog Day – Is it spring yet? – Candlemas How Did the Groundhog Get a Day of His Own? http://wilstar.net/holidays/grndhog.htm Imbolc http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imbolc About Oimelc http://www.ladyofthehearth.com/sabbats/about-oimlec.txt

Meán Fómhair /|\ Meán Earraigh – Turning the Wheel By Laneth, Order of the Dancing Flames

At this time of year, we see the world balanced in Equality between darkness and light. Autumn in the Southern Hemisphere & Spring in the North – both seasons harbour days of equal length, for it is now we celebrate the Equinox. Meán Fómhair, or Mabon, is where we stand in the South: We are bidding farewell to the harsh Summer and rushing around to prepare for the oncoming Winter. We do this as our Northern cousins bid their farewell’s to the harsh Winter, only to begin preparations for the oncoming Summer season. It is now Meán Earraigh, or Ostara. The Equinox is a time of equality, not only in the spectrum of day and night, but in our emotional personae also. We are a war-torn world, with various groups that fight for war and peace tearing what ground we have left to stand on asunder, in blind pursuit of their own agendas. Often this doesn’t meet the requirements of the people they are dedicated to serve, but then, how many remember that that is their purpose – to serve the people & not themselves? It is the responsibility of the Wizards of the community, be they religious or not, to uphold the honour and peace that our communities deserve. This time of equality should permeate our actions and thoughts and translate across our deeds into the lives of everyone we meet. It is a time where the natural forces apparent in the universe will support all acts of kindness and servitude. The days when night and day are equal both have the underlying theme of coming together. For Meán Fómhair, it’s about gathering together to prepare for the oncoming Winter, while for Meán Earraigh we are coming together to celebrate the beginning of Spring. This natural gathering together can be seen in almost all forms of life around the world – to support through the cold & to share in the joy of the Love Season. Take some time this season to think of the polarity of this world, and how we can all be so far apart, yet intrinsically drawn together to celebrate the great dance of life. In a few weeks, we shall all have the same equal day & night. Let the week leading up to it, and following, be filled with acts of kindness and ones showing acknowledgment of equality in all things and peoples.

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HIKARI the BLACK: I love April Fool's Day. I never play pranks, but keeping one step ahead of everybody else's is really fun. For me, anyway. It makes me pay attention to what's going on around me. It's a great way to practice awareness. Good April Fool's Pranks lead to laughter for everybody, not tears. Good April Fool's Jokes are clever and funny, bad ones are self-evident. ************************************************************************************

Alchemy as a Whole Tiger’s Moondiva It is thought both alchemy and chemistry came from the same root, The Emerald Tablet. Legend says The Emerald Tablet dates back to over 12,000 years ago and is credited to One who went by the name of Thoth. Alchemy is a technology of the mind, body and spirit. It seeks to transform. The main difference between it and chemistry is in that alchemy seeks knowledge of all three realms of being instead of just the physical. The most common references to the alchemist in modern times is during the Dark Ages. The European alchemists were also called "goldmakers" or "puffers." These were the guys who were quite literally trying to change lead into gold. (They also made some catastrophic messes, some of which included explosions and poisoning.) These were of those like the scientists or chemists today. They were working on one level. They were trying to transform matter, paying attention to only the physical realm even though this was warned of in Alchemy repeatedly. Alchemy is not chemistry. Chemistry pays attention only to the physical. Alchemy is a lifestyle, a philosophy and to some a religion. Certainly it involves some chemistry but for different reasons than one might imagine. The experiments done in alchemy are a physical representation of what should be happening inside ones body, mind and soul. Alchemy is the physical representation of nature’s laws at work. It can be a way for those who understand by “seeing” to better understand the spiritual. Alchemy helps me appreciate the greatness of the miracles around me. It truly shows the idea of “macrocosms and microcosms.” One will never understand that things are truly part of something bigger until one immerses oneself in the magickal sciences. At this point One will wonder how it was One never saw it in the first place. All Things From One, and to One. In the Center Truth, in a Circumference Vanity. A Magical Enigma! REFERENCES Poem from “A Warning to False Alchemists” Thomas Rawlin, London 1611 Admonitio de Pseudochymicis, seu Alphabetarium Philosophicum in quo refutatur aurum potabile Antonii, 1611.

The Butt of the Joke By Laneth, Order of the Dancing Flames There came a time, long ago, when I realized that the reasoning behind my dislike of April Fool’s Day had come from years of being singled out and focused on for jokes and tricks – either by my peers or my family. I was never a popular guy in high school and seemed to be a magnet for the socially superior's taunts. It was the kind of lifestyle where ye went to school preparing mentally for the buffeting ye were inevitably going to receive. Still, there was a recognizable line between the jokes and the bullying. And most of the time, (to the detriment of their enjoyment), I laughed at myself as well. Some of the practical jokes they played on me were hilarious, and I admit that I would have chuckled if it were to happen to someone else. But – it got tiring when it seemed to always be me that was the butt of everyone’s jokes. I guess what I’m getting at is people don’t like feeling singled out – if ye’re wont to play into the theme of April Fools and ‘get’ people with some practical jokes, make sure ye spread the laughs around. If ye know there’s someone at school or work that seems naturally self-conscious, reconsider doing a prank on them that could risk everyone around them pointing the finger and laughing. It can turn out bad, and not everyone will react kindly to being ‘seemingly’ singled out in such a way. Not everyone shares the same or even similar senses of humour. When it comes to practical jokes, the joke itself isn’t the thing that harms the person, (unless there is a certain physical component to it), it’s the feeling of being the target. People’s perceptions differ so greatly that what one person would consider being singled out, another may enjoy and laugh along with others. My advice is to play it smart on April Fool’s Day, and also to think about how ye’d feel being the subject of the joke ye’re about to play. How would ye feel if ye unknowingly walked into your joke, only to have everyone around ye laughing at your expense? Keep this is mind as ye romp around town wreaking your humorous havoc this AFD.

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The Fool and Morris Dancing Garwulf With the summer almost upon us in the United Kingdom, our villages and re-enactment fairs will begin to fill with the sound of bells and wooden sticks striking each other in rhythm to fiddle and or pipes. The Morris dancers are back and in full swing reminding us of the dances and heritage of the past. The 20th century saw a big revival of the art of Morris dancing in the United Kingdom as interest grew more and more villages revived their old civil war Morris traditions and set up troops in a bid to recapture the past, attract visitors and tourists and to pay homage to the traditions and customs of their forefathers. Growing up in the UK I have had the pleasure to witness many forms of Morris Dance from figures clad all in black with blackened faces and with a mixed troop of men and women, to traditional groups of six male dancers and a fool in greens and whites, dancing with bells on their legs and wooden sticks held deftly in their hands. Morris Dancing is a complex set of moves and music and its history is no less complex and in some cases contradictory however one thing about Morris Dancing which is stepped in even more mystery is the Character known as the “Fool” or even “Holy Fool” as it is sometimes known.

Morris dancing in the grounds of Wells Cathedral, Wells, England.July 2006 Photographed by Adrian Pingstone

The fool is a character of contradictions and enchantment. In many cases he has the mundane job of collecting money from spectators and keeping them entertained with his mad cap antics, he might juggle or buffoon around. His costume varies from troop to troop and he can look like a clown or a jester in Derbyshire for example he has also appeared in the guise of Pierrot and is often armed with a bladder on a stick (similar to how children have inflated balloons on sticks) which he bops people with in a playful manner. The fool does not just mock others he mocks himself. In this sense he is a great example of how we should sometimes take ourselves a lot less seriously and laugh at ourselves a little more often than we would normally do. In this way he helps to keep everyone happy and remind them that there is more to life than work and war. In many ways he is similar to the role of the trickster gods from various cultures. Such as Loki from the Norse mythology who was both announce to his fellow gods and even on occasions harmful to them but who also helped them out and brought them gifts. Other Tricksters include Coyote, Raven from Native American Myths or Renart the Fox from French folklore and Anansi from West African myths. What characterises each of these gods like the fool is that they rely on wit and intelligence in order to accomplish their goals violence is rarely the answer. This was all important for the role of the fool especially during the English civil war where many people found themselves on one side or the other and constantly under pressure from more puritanical churchman to not drink, not dance and not to sing. His usually colourful costumes and deviant antics not only allowed people to escape from the reality around them but he also reminded the common people that there was more to life than abstinence and obedience. Overall I think that the reason the character of the fool has endured is that he reminds us of the child in all of us. He is brave, he is funny and he is not afraid to offend and ridicule, even himself. The Fool shows all who watch that even those in power can and often are clowns no more or no less intelligent than the common people who follow them.

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Spring 2007

EXPLORING THE TAROT: THE FOOL -- Jymi X/0

“Hey, why is the Four of Swords sleeping? Huh? Huh? Give up? He SPREAD himself too thin! HAAA ha ha! Ok, ok. Sorry. Why did the Queen of Cups have to stop reading? She lost her PAGE! Whooop! Wow, tough crowd – doesn't anything SUIT you guys? And I thought I was ready for the MAJOR leagues...ba-dum-pum! Where did Crowley go when he couldn't take it anymore? To the NUIThouse! Oh! This'll be the DAATH of me! Well, I hate to leave you with a cliffhanger, but stick around for the Three of Cups Dancers, and don't forget to tip your WAITEstaff...” The Fool is Everyman/woman; he represents us at the beginning of any journey upon which we may embark. We make mistakes, we look silly, we get lost, we fail to pay attention or listen to advice, and sometimes, we walk right off the cliff and get hurt. But such is life – with luck and effort, we also make some good friends on the way, learn a few things, develop our powers, and have our share of good times and laughs!

"The Fool” by Pamela Coleman Smith, from the Rider-Waite Tarot deck

The Fool is traditionally placed between the Minor and Major Arcanas. Just as the “Ten” is the end of each suits' numeric series, and represents the start of a new cycle based on the old one (1 + 0 = 1), The Fool can be thought of as a 'wrap-up' of the wisdom and experience to be found in all of the Minor suits, which are often associated with the mundane concerns of daily life: school, work, money, conflicts, emotions. Not that these aren't important or exciting, but they happen on a different level than the archetypal metaphysical concerns symbolized by the Major Arcana. The Fool carries all the wisdom he's gleaned from the material world, wanders off the edge of experience and plummets into the unknown. P.D. Ouspensky, in his book “The Symbolism of The Tarot”, asserts that The Fool and The Magician are the same person. The Fool, he says, carries the Magician's tools in his bag; he has simply forgotten – or has yet to learn – what they mean and how to use them. Despite his usual place in the deck, the Fool's number is Zero, and he could go anywhere. Every move we make opens the door for new experiences; every moment contains the opportunity for a new start. All we ever have is our sense of what has gone before; expectations create reality (and fill-in Tarot writers create clever references to their own science articles), but the Fool reminds us that we're never completely bound to the familiar old ways: no matter how much experience we carry around with us, there's always that cliff waiting to surprise us with a new world waiting within its depths. Or maybe The Fool saunters along so confidently because he knows, deep down, that he can fly...

Areeya

References: Ouspensky, P.D. (Pogossky, A.L. Trans.) The Symbolism of THE TAROT: Philosophy of Occultism in Pictures and Numbers. New York: Dover Publications, Inc, 1976.

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Getting Ready for Summer! Tigers Moondiva

Planning on dropping some weight for swimsuit season? All you need is a little motivation and some tips to get you started! A Magickal guide to getting fit for the summer is coming your way! First things first! See yourself in your mind the way you want to be. An important tip here don’t use magazines or television to “help” you with this as these will only give you ideas that even if you were to accomplish would be very unhealthy. Pretending for a moment you don’t care about your health consider this: magical workings require energy. If one is malnourished and seriously lacking in calories I promise you your magick will likely be one of the first things to suffer. Take this from someone who knows -- being light-headed and seeing stars every time you stand up can lead you to places you do not want to go. Avoid any diet that completely wipes out any group of foods. The body was made for balance and these types of diets go completely against the way the body runs! We need balance in these foods! I am not saying we need processed foods, though. Balanced food from nature works best according to most dietitians. Stay to the outside of the grocery store and avoid the stuff in the boxes whose contents you can’t pronounce. We are learning some of these chemicals are “hunger drivers” that can make people eat even more than normal! High Fructose corn syrup is NOT your friend! Finally, get moving! Save the planet and walk to school instead of going in a car. Go roller skating on your next date instead of going for movies and popcorn. Dancing is an incredible way of raising power for spells! (This is why it is believed some of the Haitian voo-doo is so strong!) My husband was in Haiti with the military. He said those rites they did were unlike anything he’d ever felt and he felt their power a mile away. He said they would dance till they collapsed! (I am not certain going this far with it would be a good idea either -- the point I am making is DANCE for your health and for your magick!)

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FOOD PRANKS -- JUST IN TIME FOR APRIL FOOL'S DAY by Donella Lyonesse, Editor, Food Desk Here are some fun, food pranks that will harm no one...well maybe your mom would get upset if she saw it. Remember have fun, but harm none! OREO COOKIES First, very carefully open a bag of everyone's favorite cookie, the Oreo. Then remove each one from the bag and scrape the icing out carefully. Next replace the icing with white toothpaste of your choice. Refill the cookie bag and leave it in a very conspicuous place in the library, a common hall in the dorms, home room, or on a library table and sit back to enjoy the reactions of that first bite. COKE SURPRISE Take an empty coke bottle (any dark colored soda will work as well) fill it with sparkling water and soy sauce. Put the cap back on tightly and put it in the refrigerator for someone else to enjoy. VINEGAR IN WATER BOTTLE When your victim leaves the room for a moment and does not take their bottled water with them, pour a couple ounces of white vinegar into the

water. Then check the reaction after that first big swallow. M & M'S COKE PRANK Right after someone opens a can or bottle of coke, when they are not looking add some M & M's to the drink and look busy when they come back. This will cause their drink to start foaming and not stop. YUMMY CAT FOOD PRANK Get a can of tuna and a can of cat food. Empty and clean out the cat food can and put the tuna in it. Go into a roomful of people eating the tuna from the cat food can. This one usually gets a lot of people going just because they do look so much alike. YUMMY DOG FOOD PRANK And for those of you who prefer dogs...Empty a small bag of dry dog food and replace it with a similar looking cereal. Then walk into a roomful of people while eating the cereal from the dog food bag. Here again, this one works really well if you can "play" into the fact that people will see the bag and usually ignore the food you are eating totally.

Whispering Grey Matters

KITTY

Spring 2007

33

LITTER

CAKE

(original author unknown, have been making it for years) offered by Donella Lyonesse

This is a delicious cake to make for kid's parties of any kind, a Halloween party, a picnic or any fun kind of outing. I have been making this for many years and it is always one of the first desserts to disappear. Despite the cake's appearance, it is really good. For the proper "delivery" use a brand new (and definitely washed) plastic cat litter box and spoon it onto plates with a new (never used, but washed) pooperscooper. What you will need: 1 spice or German chocolate cake mix 1 white cake mix 1 large pkg. vanilla instant pudding, prepared 1 large pkg. vanilla sandwich cookies green food coloring 12 small tootsie Rolls* 1 new kitty litter pan or flat dish pan 1 new plastic kitty litter pan liner (optional wax paper can be used in a pinch) 1 new pooper scooper Prepare the cake mixes and bake them according to directions in any size pans. Prepare the pudding mix and chill until ready to assemble the "cake." Donella Lyonesse

Crumble white sandwich cookies in small batches in food processor, scraping often. Set aside all but about 1/4 cup. To the 1/4 cup cookie crumbs, add a few drops green food coloring and mix until completely colored. When cakes are cooled to room temperature, crumble into a large bowl. Toss with half the remaining white cookie crumbs and the chilled pudding. Important: mix in just enough of the pudding to moisten the cake, you don't want it too soggy. Gently combine. Line a new, clean kitty litter box. Put the cake/pudding/cookie mix into the litter box. Put three unwrapped Tootsie rolls in a microwave safe dsh and heat until soft and pliable. Shape ends so they are no longer blunt, curving slightly. Repeat with 3 more Tootsie rolls, bury them in the mixture. Sprinkle the other half of cookie crumbs over top. Scatter the green cookie crumbs lightly on top of everything --this is supposed to look like the chlorophyll that is put in the kitty litter to keep it smelling okay. Heat 3 Tootsie rolls in the microwave until almost melted. Scrape them on top of the cake; sprinkle with cookie crumbs. Spread remaining Tootsie rolls over the top; take one and heat until pliable, hang it over one side of the kitty litter box, sprinkling it lightly with cookie crumbs. Place the box on a newspaper and sprinkle a few of the cookie crumbs around for a truly disgusting effect! Here's a few options/changes I have made at different times for different functions: You can use half the amount of pudding as in the recipe and it will still turn out fine, use more or less as you wish. I personally like the recipe with the amount of pudding as given in the recipe but some prefer less. Since the layer of cookies with the green coloring is put over the top, you can really use any flavor or flavors of cakes underneath, but you want to try to maintain the "look" of kitty litter. Last option, you can choose not to crumble the cakes, but rather layer then in the pan, with the layers of pudding in between. Then sprinkle the top layer of pudding with a heavy layer of crumbled cookies. Same effect, different texture entirely to the dessert. I made this change for a family gathering After having made it the original way the year before and most everyone preferred the fun of the original cake.

Whispering Grey Matters

Feasting in Springtime

By Prof. Moonwriter, Dean of Nature Studies Here in the northern hemisphere, it’s spring: the season of beginnings and renewals. After resting through the winter, our bodies are ready to take root and bloom anew. But this takes energy, and lots of it. How can we use concepts of “seasonal eating” to awaken our bodies from their winter slumber and prepare them to embrace the warming weather and increased activities? First, help jump-start your immune system after its long winter’s nap. Get a massage; they stimulate circulation, reduce muscle stress and tension, and increase wellbeing. Walk for 20-30 minutes each day—another great way to boost immunity and improve general health. Drink 6-8 glasses of plain water every day to help cleanse your system of impurities. Use herbs as a spring tonic. Peppermint has a reviving effect; steep 1 tsp. of dried herb (2 tsp. of fresh) in freshly-boiled water for 5 minutes; strain, sweeten as desired, and drink. For a variation, add some lemon peel or some dried lemon balm to the “steep.” Ayurvedics suggest an infusion of cumin, coriander, and fennel as an energizing drink. Lemon-parsley tea is a good natural diuretic; steep thinly-sliced lemon and chopped parsley in freshlyboiled water for 5-10 minutes. It’s just the thing after a salty meal or a bag of movie popcorn. Think fresh! Grow your own organic greens, veggies, and herbs. Or, as the farmer’s market season begins, use the opportunity to purchase edibles from local vendors. Fresh produce is brimming with vitamins, minerals, and lots of green magick. Feast on fresh greens and sprouts: baby lettuce, spinach, dandelion greens (make sure they haven’t been sprayed), alfalfa and clover sprouts, cress, and chives. Serve in a salad with an oil and rice vinegar dressing, or steam lightly and serve hot with a squeeze of lemon and a grind of black pepper. Young green beans and peas are high in vitamin C and (surprise!) iron. Steam lightly—just until toothtender. Toss beans with a dab of unsalted butter and a bit of finely minced fresh garlic; sesame oil or seeds, fresh oregano, and thinly sliced scallions are other flavor alternatives. Cook young peas in a mixture of milk and cream, just until done. Add a bit of unsalted butter, a pinch of sugar, and a bit of summer savory. Other excellent springtime foods: radishes, asparagus, garlic shoots, salmon, and Dungeness crab. Welcome, spring!

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Moonwriter’s Spring Flower Salad By Prof. Moonwriter I have an organic yard and garden and always have lots of edibles growing in all the corners. I love to got outside and pick goodies for the salad. Combine in a chilled bowl: (note: wash everything first, and spin or shake dry) Assorted organic baby greens, Other salad veggies: tomatoes, scallions, shredded carrot, etc. Fresh flower mixture: Rose petals (pale yellow and pink) Johnny Jump Up blossoms (shades of purple) Young dandelion flowers (yellow) and leaves Nasturtium blossoms (orange and gold) Chive blossoms (lavender-pink) and leaves (cut finely with scissors) Calendula petals (yellow, gold, orange, and burnt red) Others, as desired) Topping: toasted pine nuts and/or sunflower seeds Top with Moonwriter’s favorite dressing: 3 parts seasoned rice vinegar 1 part vegetable oil 3-4 peeled and sliced garlic cloves (The dressing should “marinate” for at least several hours before using. As it is used, add vinegar and oil to restore the original volume and proportions. The garlic cloves will last for months before they need replacing. This dressing is very light, slightly sweet and salty, and nicely flavored with garlic.) The addition of flowers and fresh things to salads is something I do through the season. At different times of the spring, summer, and fall, I might have any of the above flowering additions, as well as Miner’s lettuce, blood sorrel, pea sprouts, garlic shoots, fiddleheads, and different lettuces and mescluns. It makes a beautiful and scrumptious salad. *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

TALIN: I like (April Fool's) day as long as it isn't mean-spirited. We have fun around the house. I did some research for Ostara and the Kalends of March recently for a Second Degree course and found out about a little holiday named Hilaria...

Whispering Grey Matters

Spring 2007

35

It Must Be True – It Was On the Internet! Don't let email rumors make a fool of you -- Jymi X/0 So. Did you ever get that check from Microsoft? You know the one – that $4000 you were supposed to get for forwarding Bill Gates' “Email Beta Tester”. What?! You didn't pass that on? Well, you certainly must have forwarded the one from poor, sick little Billy! Every time that message gets passed on, the Red Cross will donate a nickel to pay his medical bills! You deleted that, too? Why, you heartless...that's it. The Parking Lot Killer is going to get you. You read about him, right? That guy that waits in parking lots, trying to give people money, but he's really a serial killer and you should run away... False hope, guilt, and paranoia: megabytes of Internet rumors and hoaxes clog our inboxes every day. Back in the 1900s, we didn't have the Internet to spread urban legends. We had to do it on the playground at school, or at slumber parties. We didn't have cut-npaste, either, so if we got a chain letter, we had to make copies by hand and put them in the mailbox so the curse wouldn't get us! You kids these days don't know how lucky you are... When this junk shows up in your inbox (or in your MySpace bulletins) do you pass it on, 'just in case'? Would you like to know how much of it is true, and how much is pure hokum? Go check it out at www.snopes.com, or www.truthorfiction.com. These are sites devoted to debunking urban legends and Internet rumors. I've been looking up everything that comes my way, and about 99% of it is listed – and, surprise, about 98% of it is hogwash! These are fun sites to explore even if you don't have anything in particular to look up. So the next time your friend sends you that email about the horrible new computer virus that crawls out of your hard drive and shaves your dog, or the warning about the phone scam wherein you'll be asked to place a call to an area code in the Andromeda Galaxy, head over to one of these sites and search the keywords. Chances are it'll be on there in the “hoax” pile. Now for the fun part – go show this article to ten people, and someone cute will kiss you before the day is over! But if you don't pass it on, you'll have bad luck for the next forty-two years, and your fish tank will spontaneously combust... No, really.

H.M. OBERON: In the book I'm currently writing -- "A Wizard's Bestiary" -- I'm currently on the chapter on "cryptobotany" and magickal plants. So I offer you this item from these pages: Solar Complexus Americanus are heatgenerating plants supposedly imported from Venezuela. The Scandinavian botanist responsible for discovering these hot-air producers was none other than Professor Olaf Lipro (an anagram of “April Fool”). A news report of this discovery was an April Fool’s Day joke launched by the Glasgow Herald in 1995.

Prayer for a Wizard By Belenus A Wizard's Prayer I make That your power be freed For your intentions sake You'll find the spell you need For every occasion and need May you find the words and spell And emotions that will seed To change and make things well And most of all, I pray You grow each and every day In accordance with your will Of love you get your fill May all your troubles flee By the Gods, So Mote it be

Whispering Grey Matters

Spring 2007

36

The Tides Will Rise

Xyaida, Order of the Dancing Flames

At the end of 2006, the world was informed about the Polar Shelf in the northern Canadian Arctic area breaking off just south of the North Pole, near the coast of Ellesmere Island. This chunk of ice is the same size as 11,000 football fields or approximately 41 square miles in area. From what the Canadian scientists have calculated, this shelf piece actually dislodged quite a while ago: early afternoon, August 13, 2005. After the scientists reviewed satellite images, they determined that this event happened in just an hour and left quite a chunky trail of ice in its wake. This powerful disconnection was registered by earthquake monitors 155 miles away. The Ayles Ice Shelf was one of six major ice shelves still left in Canada. With the consistent climate changes, the remaining ice shelves are all 90% smaller than when they were discovered in 1906. Warwick Vincent, an arctic specialist from Laval University, has said that they are “unable to connect all the dots … but unusually warm temperatures definitely played a major role NASA images NASA images [towards the melting.]” Luke Copland is head of the new global ice lab at the University of Ottawa. Laurie Weir, from the Canadian Ice Services, informed him that while reviewing satellite images of 2005, she noticed that the shelf had split and separated. He dove in to find out what happened and why. He compiled satellite images from both Canada and US data and was surprised at how fast such an action occurred. These Canadian Arctic Ice Shelves are archaeological dreams! They contain ice that dates back 3000 years. These shelves float but are actually connected to land. Within days it had floated a few miles, but overall it floated 31 miles before it settled into the Arctic waters to be frozen in again for the winter. With spring coming fast, the worry now is whether it will again dislodge and continue to float southward as it had been. With winds and water currents there is a concern that eventually this giant piece of ice could float into the populated shipping region. Have you noticed mention of rising seas, killer heat waves, worsening droughts or even that hurricanes are found to be stronger? The leading authorities have stated these are all very accurate yet disturbing factors which portray global warming as a very real and worsening threat to the whole world.

Ross Ice Shelf, 1997

The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change consists of hundreds of scientists and representatives from 113 countries who represent the most authoritative science on the issue. These are the world’s leading climate scientists who are concerned with Global Warming. They have said that global warming is “very likely” man-made which translates to more than a 90% chance of certainty that this is so in their latest report issued this year. There was speculation on whether the committee would go so far as to claim it to be “virtually certain” that man caused global warming (which would translate to a 99% chance). Let’s face it -- most scientists are skeptics by nature, so this number has to be a bit low considering the report is based on science that is “rock-solid, peer-reviewed, conservative and consensus.” Overall, when the report was written, the blame being placed on human activity was undebatably well-worded. REFERENCE: Gilles, Rob. "Arctic Ice Shelf Breaks Free." Associated Press. Discovery Communications, Inc. 29 December 2006.