Get Your Sh*t Together - Author Note

Author’s note

Hello, and welcome to �et �our �hit �ogether . Thanks for reading! Before B efore we get too deep, I wanted to clarify clarif y a few things. First, despite the real or virtual aisle you may have

found it in, this thi s is not a traditional traditiona l selfself-help book. It’s more more of a letlet-meme-helphelp-youyou-helphelp-yourselfyourself-help help book, with “me” here to “help” when when your “self” “self ” gets in the way. Let’’s face it — if you could help yourself, you’d have done Let it by now, right? Also, unlike many traditional self-help self-help authors, I am going to use u se the word shit 332 times ti mes (including sever several al shitmanteaus of my own invention), so please do not go on Amazon saying you were expecting sunshine and kittens and got shitstorms and shittens. My mother

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reads all of those reviews and it really upsets her when people don’t “get” “get” me.

Second, although your life may be a mess — and I will help you sort it out — this is not a typical guide to “tidying up.” We won’t be spending the next three hundred pages gathering your physical physical shit into a pile and thankin th ankingg it for its service before you ship it all off to the Salvation Army. Instead,, we’re Instead we’re going to tidy up your you r mental clutter and your metaphorical shit — such as your career career,, finances, creativ creativee pursuits, pursu its, relationships, relation ships, and a nd health — and we’re we’re going to do it all without hoisting a single trash bag or having an introspective conversation with a winter coat. Finally Final ly,, just to be 100 per cent clear: If you were looklooking for tips t ips on scat play, play, this is i s not the book for you . I’m not judging! I simply want to manage expectations. Th That’ at’ss what authors’ notes are for for.. So what IS this book? Well, I think of it as a delightfully ful ly profane one-stop one-stop shop for tidying tidyi ng your mind m ind — and making maki ng your life easier and better. Like, a lot  easier and better, no matter where you’re starting from. You may be literally lying on your couch, sitting at a

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Author’s note

bus stop, or dangling your feet from the Herman Miller Aeron chair ch air behind your big shiny desk — but I’m I’m guessg uessing you picked up this th is book because, becau se, figuratively fig uratively,, you’re you’re in somewhat of a rut. And there’s no shame in that. Ruts (even literal ones) are easy to fall into. People do it all the time. Yours could cou ld be shaped like a pair of comfy comf y sweatpants and filled with stale Stella. It might be lined with the silvery stock options you stand to cash in if you can just stick with your soul-killing soul-killing job for five more years. Or maybe — and this th is is prob probably ably more likely — your rut takes the form of the regul regular ar old daily grind: grin d: work and finances fin ances and family and friends and a lot of other shit you need help staying on top of, plus neglected health (and even more neglected hobbies), and capped off by the dreams you only admit to friends after a few cocktails . . . or are too scared or anxious or overwhelmed to admit to yourself at all. Sound familiar? Well, then, strap in! Because this little let-me-helplet-me-help-youyou-helphelp-yourself yourself mental tidying guide can hoist hoi st you out of your rut and drop you slap-bang slap-bang into the life you want, and deserve, to live. (In a pinch, you could lay it in an actual rut and step on it to keep your

Author’s note

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shoes from getting all muddy. But maybe save that for after you read it.)  shows you how to set goals, how �et �our �hit �ogether  shows to push through small annoyances and thorny obstacles to meet those goals, and then how to imagine and achieve ach ieve even bigger goals that you may not, until now, have thought possible. It will help you get out of your own way, and stay out. And it will liberate you from the shit you think you should be doing so you can ca n bang out the shit you need to do, and get started star ted on the shit you want to do. How’s that for managing expectations? Basically, this book will do for your life what Tim Ferriss did for the wor workweek kweek — break it into small, sm all, manageable chunks that leave you with plenty of free time to pursue your dream of becoming a self-satisfied self-satisfied entrepreneur/public neur/ public speaker/sociopath. speaker/sociopath . No, I’m kidding. But it will do that first part, if you keep reading.

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