Get the Edge - Notes
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Notes: Get the Edge by Tony Robbins - Day 1: Hour of Power & 3 Things that Control Our Feelings 1st Day - Hour of Power & 3 Things that Control Our Feelings Hi, It's me: Jane Doe. As promised, I have created notes on some self development material that I've read and I will be posting these up along with my journal entries. All concepts in my notes are my interpretation of what was being said through the books/audio tape/ video that I read. For a more detailed explanation, please go ahead and read the book yourself. If you enjoyed the notes, I'm sure you'll benefit from going through it yourself! My ideas in my notes may be scattered, but if you really read them, each sentence has a wealth of wisdom. Please read through these notes and apply them to your life. Also, do the exercises and you can view my completed exercises as an example. I'm sure you'll have a richer life because of it. Notes: Day 1 The moment you lower your expectations, your life wanes. Your real limits are your mind set about what your limits are. Skeptics & pessimists are just afraid of being disappointed. Stress is just fear. People get more of what they focus on. People get stressed because they focus on things that don’t really matter. Self esteem is measured by how much you can control. When you react to stimulus, you aren’t in control. You can’t control what events happen to you, but you can control the meaning of the events. Ex. God is punishing me with this problem. Vs. This is a challenge. It’s time to step up. There are two worlds: the inside world and the outside world. We have little control of the external world, but we have complete control of our internal world. People always have gaps between where they are and where they want to be, no matter how great things are. Most people have “goals” that are actually wishes. Goals aren’t achieved just by hoping. Everyone has a “story” about why we can’t have what we want. You can’t lie to yourself and expect to see the success that comes from truth. In a minute, you can change your life by deciding to never again live your life below what you deserve. Life is something we “get to do”, not something we “got to do” If you’re bored, then we need to find something exciting in our life that we can move towards. You can’t build on failure. You can only build on success. Be one of the few who do. If you talk about it, it’s a dream. If you envision it, it becomes possible. If you schedule it, it becomes real. You can succeed anything by modelling others who have been successful before you. To have an extraordinary life, you need to master: 1. the science of achievement – focused on future 2. the art of fulfillment – focused on present
You need to focus on both the present and the future to be fulfilled for the long term. Every time you achieve a goal, you better send the next one up quickly so that you’re never stagnant. A juiced life is where you have the primary emotions that you want. Emotion is motion. You got to move everyday even if it’s just a gentle form of movement. Schedule an hour of power or thirty minutes to thrive or at least fifteen minutes of fulfillment. Steps: 1. Jump out of bed 2. Start walking for 5 mins. 4 breathes in through your nose and 4 breathes out your mouth. 3. Get grateful. Focus on what are all the things I am grateful for. I’m so grateful for... my health, my family members, my business, my friends, these special moments. 4. Focus on everything you really want in your life, but you focus on it as if it has already been done. Thank you so much for... that deal being done, getting an A on my report card, letting me finally help someone, having a great meeting, making this person laugh. a. Everything that is in the outside world started in your inside world. 5. Incantations. Chant this out loud. You could do it with or without the initial breathing. “I love my life!, Everyday in everyway,y I’m getting stronger and stronger/ happier and happier.” 6. Celebrate at the end! 7. You can also add prayer to this, maybe under the thank you section. How you feel is your life. You only want something because you want a feeling that comes with it. Write down all the emotions you feel on an average week to discover what your life is really like. 3 reasons why you feel any feeling (the triad): 1. the movement and position of your body a. do a power move; say yes and clap your hands to change your emotions 2. The pattern of focus and belief; whatever you focus on, you’ll feel because your brain doesn’t know the difference between what is real or not. a. When you have a problem, only focus 5% on describing the problem and 95% on the solution
b. People who succeed focus on what they get at the end of the process. People who fail focus on the process. c. In order to feel this emotion, what would I have to believe or focus on? i. Is that really true? ii. What am I saying to myself? iii. What do I need to focus on? What does it really mean? 3. Watch the language you use a. Ask a better question to direct your focus b. What phrases to do you say to other people Ex. You’re mistaken vs. You’re wrong vs. You’re lying c. Incantations: what you say to yourself over and over again with emotion All the emotions I feel on an average week: Pleasant feelings: love, gratefulness, pride, success, joy, energized, curious, determined, satisfaction, turned on, Unpleasant feelings: frustrated, sad, disappointed, fearful (stressed), unmotivated, regretful, bored, angry, confused I hope you gained some incite about yourself. Please look out for Day 2 coming up tomorrow! Also, please give me your comments. If you found this hub helpful, click on "Vote Up" and go through the "Was this hub..." poll. Thank you for taking this journey with me, Jane Doe Notes: Get the Edge by Tony Robbins - Day 2: Create a System for Change Since today is new years eve and many of you will be creating resolutions, I thought I'd provide some tools so that THIS YEAR, you really MAKE THAT CHANGE. These are my own notes taking after listening to Tony Robbins' Get the Edge audio tape Day 2. Please go through the exercises yourself and view mine as an example. To make this year the year you change, take the time to do this. I cannot stress enough how important this is! It may be a lot of material to go through in one day. So please click "Bookmark this hub" on the right side of the screen or bookmark it through your browser. So you can return to it
tomorrow if you feel that it's too much to go through at one time. And you're really committed to making a change, you'll go through this hub and do the exercises. Ok, let's start! Notes Most people buy something good for them and then they feel comfortable and then don’t use it! The road to someday leads to a town called nowhere. Raise your standards. Turn your shoulds into musts. Discipline means you are in charge. You say you’ll do something and you do it. The only antidote to rationalizing is to tell the truth. Understand the power of now. Time is the only thing that people are equal in. We aren’t equal in our opportunities. Make a list of the most common rationalizations I use. People don’t do something because it’s too tough/big to do right now. So chunk things down, say I can do one phone call or I’ll just run for 5 mins. This also happens on the negative side. I’ll just rest here for a second or I’ll just watch one TV show. Use momentum and chunking to follow through. Exercise is the best way to get out of stress. Just DO. Create systems so that you don’t give yourself time to rationalize. Put your shoes next to your bed. Tell yourself the truth and act upon it quickly. Nothing gets better until someone admits something is wrong. Make a list of things that I now have, which I once only dreamed of having. How did you accomplish those things? Model your past successes People use “softeners”. Well it’s not that bad. I’m only a few pounds overweight. Mediocrity is not being average compared to others. It’s living less than you deserve and willing to strive for. In life, what you give you get to keep. But what you fail to give, you lose forever. Pressure cooker pattern: i. Your pains get to threshold ii. You take action iii. You get results iv. Your pain reduces v. You lose drive vi. You get back to where you were before 7 Steps to lasting change 1) Get disturbed; Get honest. Say softeners/rationalization/comparisons to others.
i) Ex. Look at what you’re missing out on because you haven’t followed through or taken action. Make it worse than it is. ii) Get a peer group that are already successful in the area that you want to achieve in 2) Make a real decision i) Results: know what you want and can really be passionate about ii) Purpose: why you want it iii) Massive action plan: have multiple ways to achieve your desired results iv) Write these three things 3) Come up with a real plan that is very specific and measurable i) Recall why you are going after your goal because your plan may not work ii) Refine result and add to your purpose iii) Star 3,4,5 actions that you know for sure will get you this goal just for now iv) Make very specific with times. Add actions that commit you to an action. v) Flexibility is key to success vi) Model what you did in the past to help you succeed in your action plan vii) Write down all the things that you have right now that you once only dreamed that you had. Circle one or two that were really tough to get and you got it. Notice your patterns. 4) Change your beliefs. All turn arounds are turn arounds in beliefs i) When you’re having a negative emotion, ask “what would I have to believe to feel this way?” Make yourself aware of your negative beliefs. Just knowing how poisonous your beliefs are can change your beliefs. ii) What do you want to change? What negative beliefs do you have about that subject? Remember you won’t do anything you want to or should do. You will only do what you need to do or must do. What beliefs do you need to make a change? Connect those activities to your identity. iii) Most people don’t keep themselves in pain long enough to take action. The few that do look for something to instantaneously relieve their pain and take away their drive. Those that decide to take action fail to create a real action plan. Those that create an action plan fail to change their beliefs so they go back into their old pattern.
5) Set yourself up to win. Reward yourself when you do something approximately right at the beginning. i) Do something that adds to the emotional intensity that makes the process enjoyably not just the outcome 6) Take Massive action. The power is in now. a) Never leave the site of setting a goal without taking a step forward. Think of a big action and a small action. 7) Use the power of environment to raise your standards. Most people’s lives are a direct reflection of the expectation of their peer group because you need love and connection from our peers. Love your family and pick your peer group. Get a coach. Ex. Find a friend who loves working out so that I work out too. a) Don’t make things more complicated than they need to be. Don’t need a massive detailed plan. Just get some momentum. b) Who will be leading you by example? Who will really push you? 3 kinds of opponents: External opponents = other people who want your time and attention Intimate opponents = people who are close to you who don’t understand why you can’t spend time with them Internal opponent = conflicting beliefs; figure out what beliefs are stopping you Static contraction = lift much more weight than you thought you could before [Please research this for yourself. It could improve your workout routine forever] Model what you did in the past to help you succeed now. Use NET time (No extra time = travel time, exercise or other time) to listen to audio tapes or do other things. Create a chart of your average emotions and chart your level for each emotion at different time during the day for many days. According to when you follow through and don’t follow through. Workbook The most common rationalizations I use: I don’t have time I have plenty of time to finish this off so I’ll do it later There are other things that are more important that I need to finish I’m not in the right mood so I’d be wasting time by trying to concentrate right now I’m hungry so I’ll eat instead I can make it. I won’t be late List of things that I now have that I once only dreamed of having: My outgoing personality at parties
My ability to relate to someone on a one on one basis Ability to say a speech in front of a tonne of people I’m in a great business group because I took a step towards reaching out I went on a great date with a great guy so now I know that there really are great guys out there because I put myself out there. I am so centred and rarely get depressed because I’m learning so much about emotional intelligence I am incredibly calm in times of stress I have a great group of friends I am at a university that I love and am growing by living away from my parents I have an amazingly sculpted body and really enjoy working out at the gym I know so much about finances now My own steps to change: 1) I am disturbed about the fact that I have not been taking action on what I’ve been learning in my self-development books and audio tapes. 2) RPM brainstorm: a) I want to utilize every single thing that I find valuable in my self-development books and audio tapes. b) I want to see substantial progression in my life. If I start using what I learn, then I will be able to accomplish everything that I want to achieve easily. I can have all the money I need to not ever have to worry about not having enough money again. I will be able to communicate with my family and friends in a way that makes them and I feel loved. I will be able to find that amazing person that I can have a romantic relationship with. I can have an immense amount of energy and joy in my life. I won’t have to settle for a pathetic, unloving, boring, slothful life and mindset. But really, what bothers me is that I know I could do these things and I am an achiever. I feel like I am wasting my time and just becoming complacent after I listen to these things and not really pushing forward. I feel lazy and complacent without really following through and using what I have learned. c) I need to create a system of taking action. i) Go through new book/audio tape once a week or once every 2 weeks ii) Spend one hour a day actually doing a self-development activity (in addition to my hour of power) iii) Work on one idea a week. Carry around a card with that idea on it. At the end of the week, see how well it worked and if I really used the idea. Then select another topic. I could also do this daily, but may be too short a period of time. iv) Create an ultimate schedule and keep track of completion with check list. Give myself awesome positive feedback for following through and give myself plucks if I don’t complete all the tasks or a certain percentage of the tasks daily/weekly/monthly v) Set an alarm on my cell phone to remind me to do certain tasks to follow through
vi) Set an alarm on my cell to record my feelings and actions down in a notebook so I can keep track of how I am feeling and what I am doing during the day vii) Keep track of every 15 mins throughout the day and see where my time is really being spent; do what all those time management books have been telling me to do viii) Review what needs to be done the previous night and in the morning when I get up ix) Instead of working on 1 thing a week, work on 3 or 4 things a week and just keep them in mind. Or work on the things I am learning that week x) Share what I learned with a friend and try to lead by example xi) Start up that blog that I was thinking of doing and have other people monitor my progress and force myself to follow through xii) Have one friend for each type of goal, ex. Fiona for exercise, Abby for healthy food choices, Alex for studying, Eddie for finances and self development, xiii) Make lots of new friends in the leadership class I’m going to take next semester so we can work on things together xiv) Read about people who have taken massive action and changed their lives so I have someone to model xv) Be part of an internet group and get an internet friend to keep tabs on me 3) Action Plan i) Go through new book/audio tape once a week or once every 2 weeks (1) This week is special because I have no school. So I will do one book/tape every day. By Wednesday Dec 22nd, I will have finished making notes and doing homework from Get the Edge and I would have started on a library book. ii) Start up that blog that I was thinking of doing and have other people monitor my progress and force myself to follow through (1) Once tomorrow I will open an account with a blog site under the name Jane Doe and upload the summary of Get the Edge along with my workbook stuff and my journal entry for what has happened this semester and what I look forward to doing. I will have a blog entry every day because I have to go through one book a day, but usually it will be once a week or it could be bi weekly should I decide it later on. iii) Have one friend for each type of goal, ex. Fiona for exercise, Abby for healthy food choices, Alex for studying, Eddie for finances and self development,
(1) Make list of all the goals I want to achieve (when you finish the Get the Edge program, you should have a list of goals to complete) and select 2 people to keep you on track for each goal category and start keeping in contact with them before asking them to be your coach iv) Create an ultimate schedule and keep track of completion with check list. Give myself awesome positive feedback for following through and give myself plucks if I don’t complete all the tasks or a certain percentage of the tasks daily/weekly/monthly (1) Create this ultimate schedule before going to Auntie Nikki’s house on Dec 24th and review plan daily right after dinner. Think of some positive feedback mechanism. (2) Revise ultimate schedule weekly on Saturday night before going out for the night, but not daily, you can only add stuff, but never take away. v) Keep track of every 15 mins throughout the day and see where my time is really being spent; do what all those time management books have been telling me to do (1) Starting when I get up tomorrow. I will print out a daily calendar so that I can fill it out with where I am spending my time. 4) Change my Beliefs a) In the past, all the beliefs that have kept me from taking action: 5-6 i) I have time to do it later. I just really need to relax right now because I worked so hard yesterday. ii) What if I do all these things and really give my all and put all the effort in and it really doesn’t change my life? I really don’t achieve my goals? Then I’ll be a failure. iii) What if I change my life and I don’t like the change? I get so busy that I break down, like I did 3 years ago when I was so worried about my grades. It’ll take too much time to really follow through with all these activities and I can make the change in my mind set without going through these activities. iv) My identity is very tied to being an achiever and always being right. If I try something and I don’t get it right the first time, then I am a failure. v) I don’t really need to make a change now because I have plenty of time later to do it. vi) My life is really good right now so I don’t need to change it. b) New beliefs that will empower me: 5-7 i) Since I worked so hard the other day, I need to congratulate myself by utilizing the momentum that I created and really go forward. ii) I may put tonnes of effort into something and it may not turn out the way I want it to. But it is better to try out that strategy early and find out right away that it doesn’t work than to wonder about whether it will work or not. I am not a failure if things don’t work out the way
they do. If that happens, my strategy didn’t work and it means that I’m closer to reaching my goal because now I know how I need to tweak my strategy. If I try something, then I am an achiever. If I don’t try anything because I have a fear of failing, then I am a failure. iii) If I change my life and I don’t like the change, which is very unlikely, but let’s say I don’t like the change, then I can always go back to my life as it was because I already know what to do to go back there. Unless I make the change, I will never know if I like it or not. My life is horrible right now, compared to the level that I want it to be at. It could be so much better and unless I make the effort to change, my life will stay stagnant and to stay still is to die. iv) Going through with these activities is an investment in me and my future. It will be very difficult to make changes in myself without doing my homework about myself. v) My break down 3 years ago was not because I had too much work to do or that I had too many things going on. My break down 3 years ago was because I did not know how to manage my worry and did not have the tools to align my goals properly. I didn’t acknowledge progress that I was making and didn’t really see things as they really were. I now have the tools to stop myself from getting to that point long before I get close to it. 5) Add extra things so that I enjoy the process i) As I’m doing my exercises, imagine all the changes that will happen in my life as a result of taking the time to focus on me. ii) Think about how I will impact others like me who are pursuing their goals iii) Think about how this will impact the people who will interact with me and how happy I can make them feel and how I can disturb them to make a better change in their lives iv) Find a buddy so we can discuss what we’ve learned together and read each other’s notes so we can point out things that may not be obvious to the person who did the exercise. v) Listen to some outrageous music while I do my exercise so I really get into a peak state, not during the audio tapes or readings because I’ll get distracted. 6) Take massive action i) Big Action: Actually finish off Get the Edge right away ii) Small Action: Take all my books that I have to read out and order them in my priority of reading 7) I will team up with people who are already successful or have parallel goals as me and who are really committed to achieving them. Fiona and I (and maybe Abby) will go workout together. I will make lots of friends in my leadership class so we can all help each other out. My Conclusion I hope you really went through and did the exercises! If you did, congratulations! If you didn't, go back and do them!!
Please let me know if this hub was helpful and if you'd like to keep seeing more like these. So comment on my hub & ask me questions. If you found this hub helpful: please "Vote up" Fill out the "Was this hub..." poll Bookmark this hub Become a follower Subscribe to my RRS feed & most importantly, read the rest of my Notes and Journal entries! Thank you for taking this journey with me, Jane Doe Notes: Get the Edge by Tony Robbins - Day 3: Building Amazing Relationships Hi everyone! This are my summary notes for Day 3: Building Relationships of Get the Edge by Tony Robbins. This audiotape is jam packed with tools that I use on a daily basis to enhance my life. Whether you're in an intimate relationship or not, this hub is for you! Please go through the notes and really take the time to do the exercises (check out my completed exercises as an example). I guarantee that if you do and really take action in your life, your life will be so much more richer. Notes The purpose of relationships is to magnify human emotion. If people are upset with you, they just are trying to fill their needs. If you don’t contribute, you are eliminated. So in order to grow, you need to contribute. If you want a relationship, but don’t have one, it’s because you have mixed emotions about relationships. It’s not a must to be in a relationship, it’s probably a must not to get hurt. If you don’t want a relationship, you link up so much pain to relationships and eventually it will create even more pain because we all have a need to feel that love and connection. Relationships are all about our emotional associations. If you are in a relationship, but you don’t want to be in it, you are linking even more pain to leaving. This person that you are having a relationship with deserves a fresh slate. Are you thinking this person is someone else? Are you adding a meaning that isn’t accurate?
Stress comes from making this bigger than they are. When you’re upset, ask yourself: what else could this mean? Make yourself come up with more positive meanings than negative meanings. When you assume the worst, you hurt the person even if you’re right. Do I want to be right or do I want to me in love? Who were you today, in terms of relationships? The quality of your life is directly proportional to the quality of your relationships. A relationship is where you go to give, not a place to get. If you keep track of how much you give, then you have a transaction. Relationships are about meeting each other’s needs. (See the 6 human needs.) Significance is the need to feel important enough to be worthy of love. Most people have emotional drives that are created through a mismatch of past events. We need to focus Feminine energy: love and connection Masculine energy: breaking through and conquering To have a great relationship, you need to first love yourself. Give love to yourself. Say I love you to yourself. Take some special time for yourself. Acknowledge yourself. Create an action plan to show yourself that you love yourself. Make a list of 10 things that you are going to do. When you give a compliment, give a sincere compliment with reference to a specific action or quality You can’t just run away from your relationships because you bring yourself with you. The important things in a romantic relationship: 1) Selection – people have similar, support or complementing natures a) Can they do the job of being in a relationship with you b) Will they do the job of being in a relationship with you i) Does this person’s personal goals align with being in a relationship with you (1) Ex. They want kids and you don’t – bad!
ii) Does their nature work with this relationship (1) Ex. Your lover doesn’t show a lot of affection, but you really need a lot of affection – bad! c) Do your values match up? i) Your goal is to contribute to as many people as possible, but their goal is to stomp on people to get to the top. – bad! ii) If not, you’ll have to be repressed. iii) Includes sensuality. Watch your masculine and feminine energies. Polarities create that spark. iv) You can’t change your partner 2) What is your ideal relationship and what are your musts? Emotionally, spiritually, physically, career etc. a) Most people are clear about what they don’t want. Start out with describing the mate from hell. Then the opposite is the mate from heaven. Star the musts in a relationship and must nots in a relationship. b) Rate your partner according to your musts (0 to 10) i) If your scores were high, acknowledge your partner to enhance your relationship. ii) If your musts are low, think about what you need to do to make it better so they will want to do your musts. iii) You consistently bump into the 4 Rs of a lousy relationship because you don’t share the same values and your natures are not consistent (1) Resistance – your partner says something and you think “I wish they wouldn’t say that.” (2) Resentment – think “I hate when they do that.” (3) Rejection – say “Do you have to always say that?” You overreact and your partner wonders why you’re saying that (4) Repression – you’re roommates and you’re not passionate. You find fulfillment in other areas of your life (5) You’ve got to make a decision about whether you need to work towards a great relationship or end your relationship. Don’t make a decision too quickly. Make sure you give yourself a timeline to make this decision. Don’t be satisfied with a mediocre relationship because that kills your spirit. If you don’t end a bad relationship, it’s your fear that is stopping you. 3) Who do you need to become to attract this person?
a) Describe the values, character traits b) You need to become the person you want to attract. Like attracts like. c) Categorize these things into musts and shoulds d) Rate yourself according to your musts as if your partner were rating you, not you rating yourself (0 to 10) e) Ask your partner what their musts are so you know what you need to do. 4) Create an action plan a) In a relationship, create an action plan that boosts your relationship i) Make a beautiful letter, call them in the middle of the day and tell them you love them. Not get so angry quickly. Then ask them to do something small for you ii) Ask them what they are resentful about iii) Make a list of magic moments. Ask good questions: how did I get so lucky to meet this person? Do this with your partner iv) At least once every 10 days, do something alone together v) At least once every 3-6 months, go away for multiple days together vi) Twice a year, set up goals together b) Create an action plan on how you will separate from the relationship. i) Say that it’s the best for both of you in the long term. Note that you’re not giving your all. Your natures are just different. Don’t make them wrong. ii) Make sure you have a conversation where you look into each other’s eyes and don’t break eye contact during the conversation. iii) Preserve the relationship and transform it into a friendship or other relationship iv) Create a vacuum in your life to find another person. Don’t stay with this person while looking for another person 5) Single: create a marketing plan. Don’t judge a list too quickly. Let people reveal themselves to you. a) Be that person that you described so you can attract that person b) Love yourself
c) Put yourself in an environment where there are lots of people and you are most likely going to find the mate you described and go there regularly. d) Tell people who know possible mates with the values and characteristics that you want e) In transition time where you are values and changing quickly, you may outgrow your mate who you share similar values In your relationships, you should give your all, but also allow others to give to you. Self honesty is the secret to an ideal life. You rarely attract someone who is everything you want without you being everything they want. Decide what you want in a relationship before the hypnosis of attraction kicks in. Clarity is power. The more specific something is the easier it is to attract it. If your learning leads to knowledge, you’re a fool! Your learning should lead to action! Workbook Action Plan to really show myself that I love myself For the next 7 days take 2 mins after you wash your face and brush your teeth to say, “I love you, Jane Doe. I love your caring heart...” & flirt with yourself Do my hour of power Say Yes! After every little accomplishment Dress the best you can when you go out and wear lip gloss Make a list of the reasons why I love myself daily after dinner and each time I add one point, I reread the previous ones Write a love letter to myself and let myself find a while from now. Write a letter at the beginning of the year and open it the next year. Message my friends on Facebook to bring myself up At the end of my blog, write I love you, Jane Doe XOXO Pat myself on the back and hug myself Create a chart of your average emotions and chart your level for each emotion at different times during the day for many days. Mate from hell: He doesn’t pay for dinner or open doors for me and is not a provider. He doesn’t express his emotion to me. He’s not spiritual. All he does is play video games and watches TV. He doesn’t ever call me or calls me too often. Must nots: He is rude to his family, friend and people around him. He is not a gentleman and reeks of feminine energy. He’s ugly and fat or creepy and skinny. He has no drive in life. He tries to sleep with me on the first date. He watches tonnes of porn and is a cheater. He doesn’t respect my point of view. He’s egotistical and thinks he’s all that. No one likes him and he doesn’t have many friends. The mate from hell is an idiot who is not educated or doesn’t believe that learning is important. He’s a bad kisser and not present when we’re intimate.
Mate from heaven: Shoulds: He is respectful of everyone around him and is a giver. He’s a man’s man, meaning he has so much masculine energy that guys look up to him as a role model. In our intimate moments, he opens up to me and is vulnerable. He also expresses his love in front of other people. He is so good looking too. He is spiritual, maybe not in a specific religion, but believes in a higher power and has a great sense of faith. He uses his time wisely and fills his needs through things that’ll make him grow and not just distract him, like TV or video games. When we do get intimate, he is an amazing kisser and makes me feel completely cared for. He has tonnes of friends because so many people are attracted to his glow. I want him to call me because I love talking to him. He has a great mind set and outlook on life. We have a great sense of chemistry. Musts: We share the same values in terms of marriage, kids and financial lifestyle. The mate from heaven is committed to constant learning. He is fit, not just because he does weights, but because he really cares about his body and incorporates cardio in there too. He has to be taller than me. He has specific goals that he is constantly progressing towards. He’s adventurous and loves trying new things. He’s a complete gentlemen and provider and makes me feel like he cares about me. He’s respectful of my feelings and doesn’t do anything sexually and that makes me feel uncomfortable. I can be completely vulnerable with him and in those moments, he makes me feel absolutely loved. He’s fun and playful and we have great conversations. He is respectful of the opinions of others even if they’re different from his. He is self confident, but also humble and brings others up with him. The person I would have to become to attract my ideal mate: Musts: I need to become a women’s woman. I need to connect with other women in a way that makes them wonder, “Why is she so happy?” I need to express my love for people in public. I need to look my best every time I go out. I have to be a lady and a great lover. I need to dress like a lady would and make my gentleman feel amazing for being a provider. - 3 I don’t just receive, but I have to provide for my man emotionally. That means encouraging him in his goals and acknowledging the actions that he takes. I need to make him feel like I will always be there for him and be a soft place for him to fall. I need to be an emotional provider. When we’re together, I need to make sure that he knows I like him and that he’s the only one. When guys call me, I need to be completely present with them and call back promptly. - 2 I need to hold off on bringing up sexual things and talk about it in a way that shows that it’s an expression of love and not just some fun thing to do. I need to be respectful of his sexual preferences too. I need to stop watching porn and masturbating so much so that when I’m intimate with him, he really does it for me. - 1
I need to be fun and playful and be a great conversationalist. I need to be respectful of other people’s opinions and bring them up in their self confidence. I need to have a great relationship with my family and friends. I need even more friends! - 6 I need to love myself and be confident, but not egotistical. I need to open up to guys earlier in the relationship and tell them what I want. I need to express my values clearly in my speech and actions. I need to go out and try new things so I can be adventurous. I need to fill my life with good actions. I need to have a great mind set and outlook on life. I need to be fit too. I need to practice my faith more. I have to be committed to constant learning and take action towards making progress in my goals. - 4 Marketing Plan to find your perfect mate: Actually do list of things to love myself Get numerous friends and connect with them on a deep level Create a set of goals before going to that event Look my best every time I go out. Maybe not all make up on, but at least lip gloss Meet new people at this event Introduce myself to everyone at a party Compliment every single person I have a conversation with at a party Never again will I watch porn. I will only masturbate if I haven’t done so for 14 days. Whenever I masturbate, I record it in my monthly calendar in my agenda. Really take action towards achieving my goals Arrive 10 mins early and start connecting with people as they come Every time you meet someone, compliment them. Every day, go on Facebook and talk to 10 new people through wall posts, comments, likes and reply to wall postsIf a guy calls/texts me, I respond to him within the next 3 hours. I ask qualifying questions. Once I know I like a guy, I compliment him. I find out what his goals are really acknowledge his actions. Be honest about how I feel about a guy. I let him know what my major goals are in life and my values by the 3rd date. Conclusion For a more complete description of this section, please listen to Get the Edge yourself. Also, take a look at Day 1 & Day 2 and look out for Days 4-7 within this week. Folow my journal entries to see how I've used these tools in my life and if they'd actually worked in the coming weeks. Please give comments or ask questions. If you found this valuable: "Vote Up" & Fill out "Was this hub...". Also, eead my other hubs, follow me, subcribe to my RRS feed & bookmark this hub. Thank you for taking this journey with me, Jane Doe Notes: Get the Edge by Tony Robbins - Day 4: The Secret to Lasting Energy As you may already know, I am putting up my summary notes from Tony Robbin's Get the Edge audiotape. This day is very short because the message is straightforward. The ideas maybe scattered, but each sentence is a wealth of knowledge and the action steps are clear. If you want a great explanation, please listen to the audiotape yourself. I'm sure you'll benefit from it. Please take action on this knowledge! It'll transform yourself.
Notes The acid-alkaline balance affects everything in your body. Acid takes our body out of balance. Negative emotions create acids. You can use pH strips to check your acidity. You can take a look at your blood to see the state of it. Yeast and Candeda are growing in 50% of people. To get rid of them, eat alkaline foods. Sugar=acid=glue Our body is just a bunch of small electrical pulses. Your organs need energy to work. Foods give energy, but also require energy to be digested. Eat foods that provide lots of energy and require less energy to be processed. You must cleanse: Drink a lot more fluids than usual. Drink green drinks – the most potent is wheat grass Only drink green drinks from 7-10 days, at least 3-5 days Drink one green drink before eating Alkaline foods (look more up online): Raw almonds Leafy greens Cucumbers Green drink Conclusion I hope you take some actions on these notes to transform your life! Please look at Day 1-3 in my other hubs and my journal entries. Also, look out for Days 5-7 in the next 3 days. Please give comments or ask questions. If you found this valuable: "Vote Up" & Fill out "Was this hub...". Also, eead my other hubs, follow me, subcribe to my RRS feed & bookmark this hub. Thank you for taking this journey with me, Jane Doe Notes: Get the Edge by Tony Robbins - Day 5: The Secret to Controlling Your Emotions This is the day you've all been waiting for! As promised, here are my summary notes for Day 5 of Get the Edge by Tony Robbins. Please go through the notes. I think you'll find them useful in terms of figuring out why we have negative emotions and how we can get rid of them. Notes People only do things to get a certain emotion. Negative emotions are a signal that a change is needed; they are action signals The more you don’t listen to your emotions, the worse the emotion feels. How people deal with emotions:
1) People avoid negative emotions ex. People try not to feel rejected and they never reach out to others. 2) People try to endure it and may also deny it. “Ah, it doesn’t feel that bad”, but they still focus on how they’ve been wronged. 3)
People use it as competition. “You think that’s bad! Let me tell you about my day.”
Hear the emotion and utilize them.
We create our own emotions. We have rules that say: when XYZ happens, then I get to feel loved/depressed. Try an exercise where you put your body and mind in a state of hope and notice how you feel. Then try it with the state of expectance. You control your own emotions. What triggers the emotions that you feel in your life?
10 types of negative emotions: 1)
Uncomfortable – bored, impatient, uneasy, mildly embarrassed
Fear – concern, apprehension, anxiety, terrified
You need to prepare for or deal with something in the future
What do I have to do to get prepared? Is my fear justified?
Expectation that has not been met and you have a sense of loss
Is there really a loss here? Have I communicated my needs?
Angry – resentful
a) An important rule has been violated by someone or yourself. You have a lot of hurts that have built up. b) Communicate that you have a standard and you know it’s only your rule but you need their help. Or compromise your rules. 5)
You feel held back or hindered in your pursuit of something
Change your approach to achieving a goal
Sad or defeated as a result of something that didn’t turn out well
b) Expectation that you had probably won’t happen. Change your expectation so it’s more realistic for the situation at hand. c)
Maybe you need to extend the amount of time you give to a goal
Guilt – regret
a) You violated your own standards. Do something immediately to that you don’t violate it in the future. b) Make things right when you screw up. You can only change your present and future behaviours. When you do that, get rid of your guilt. 8)
Inadequacy - Less then or unworthy
Is this an appropriate emotion? Change your criteria.
You need to do something to get better in this area, like practice.
Overloaded – overwhelmed, hopeless, depressed
a) More than you could possibly deal with. You’re expecting to do too much in too little of a time. b)
Immobilizes most people than the others combined
Re-evaluate what’s most important and put it into order of priority.
Handle first thing. Then go on to the next thing.
10) Lonely a)
Alone, separate from
We need a connection with someone else. It means you really care about people.
What action do you really need to do?
6 steps to handle negative emotions: 1)
Identify the category that this emotion most fits in
Change your state
Clarify what you want
Acknowledge and appreciate the message it is offering you.
a) Is this an appropriate feeling to have at this moment with this person in this situation? Am I being inappropriate? i)
If is inappropriate, you need to change your perception – decide to feel confident
If is appropriate, you need to change your procedure
Change the way you communicate - try change the timing at which you communicate
Change a behaviour
Get curious about what it’s offering you. How could you use this?
How do I really want to feel?
What would I have to believe in order to feel this way right now?
What am I willing to do to handle this right now so that I can feel that way?
d) What’s great about this? What can I learn from this so that in the future I don’t have to go through this again? 4)
Get yourself confident and reassured by noticing how you’ve done this in the past.
Have I ever felt ___ and I got over it?
5) Get yourself certain that you can handle anything like this in the future by practicing what you’ll do. a) Imagine3 -4 different ways you can communicate something so that your relationships are re-enforced 6)
Take action and change your life.
Don’t practice things, just do it. Handle emotions when they’re little so that they’re not so big. Use language to soften your negative emotions. The best way to get what you want is to focus on it. If you want to do certain behaviours, just put yourself in a state where those behaviours are automatic. Use these steps deliberately for the next 2 days. Pull out steps every now and then when you feel down.
10 emotions that you want to cultivate daily: 1)
Love and warmth
Appreciative and grateful
Excited and passionate
Confidence and faith
Make a list of things that make you feel good and it in order for use. Adopt a belief: The best is always yet to come. I can make any relationship work if it’s really important to me. There is always a way if you’re committed. People do the best they can with the resources they have. Workbook List of things that make me feel good: Turn on some music and dance around Turn on Salsa or bachata music and dance Compliment a friend Connect with my friends through Facebook or just talking to someone. Watch some Tony Robbins on Youtube or on his website Read through my SD notes or workbook Hug myself Go on Facebook or on my computer and look through pictures
Exercise Conclusion I hope you learned a lot from these notes and apply them to enhance your life! Please check out the different topics from Days 1-4 in my previous hubs and look for for 6 & 7 coming up in the next 2 days. Also, see how I've used the self development material I've learned in my life and see what's worked and what hasn't through reading my Journal Entries. Please give comments or ask questions. If you found this valuable: "Vote Up" & Fill out "Was this hub...". Also, read my other hubs, follow me, subcribe to my RRS feed & bookmark this hub. Thank you for taking this journey with me, Jane Doe Notes: Get the Edge by Tony Robbins - Day 6: The Secret to Wealth Hi everyone! Welcome to my summary notes for Day 6 of Get the Edge by Tony Robbins. Please read through these principles and apply them to your life! Notes Take your thoughts and ideas and make them physical. Get grateful. You never get beyond scarcity. You have to start beyond it. Spend less than you earn! Call your banker and have him automatically withdraw 10% and put into a money market account while you decide where it goes. Most people become rich in times of economic tragedy. Separate at least 10% into investing Asset allocation - have 3 buckets: 1)
Growth bucket 30% – stocks, real estate, collectibles, mutual funds
Savings bucket 30% – Fixed income investments
Fun bucket 30%
The proportion in each bucket is dependent on you. Don’t put all your money into one bucket. Don’t let the moment grab you. Once you put money into your first 2 buckets, don’t touch it until you make a profit. Only take profits from the growth bucket.
12 steps to become wealthy:
Clearly define what wealth means to them
a) In order to pay for your basic needs, the amount of money is so much smaller than you think. Only 30K- 40K. b)
You need to define wealth at different levels
Keep your target still and give yourself feedback when you reach the different levels
Define wealth in ways that seem impossible to achieve
Believe you will achieve it so will make steps toward it
Make it an absolute must to be wealthy
Have a realistic plan.
Follow through on your plan. Make it so you can’t help but follow through.
8) Don’t listen to experts and let them take care of their money. Instead, take care of your own money 9)
Don’t give up when they face major financial challenges
10) Think of your life or conduct their life as a business where you need to have a profit 11) Don’t allow other people’s pessimism or optimism to affect their thought process and actions 12) Get quality coaching
Things you need to get money: Time Compounded growth Make intelligent choices. Define asset allocation and learn about investing Money. You can earn it. I hope you learned a lot from this blog. If you found it useful, please read my other hubs on various topics from Days 1-5 and look out for Day 7: Find the purpose in life, which will be posted up tomorrow! Also, see my progress as I use these tools in my own life. Please give comments or ask questions. If you found this valuable: "Vote Up" & Fill out "Was this hub...". Also, read my other hubs, follow me, subcribe to my RRS feed & bookmark this hub. Thank you for taking this journey with me,
Jane Doe Notes: Get the Edge by Tony Robbins - Day 7: Find the Purpose of Your Life Hey everyone! Here are my notes for Day 7 of Get the Edge by Tony Robbins. The thoughts are scattered, but each sentence is an important idea. Please go through the exercises to really change your life! Notes The purpose of a goal is not to achieve it, but to make you a better person. You need to enjoy the process, not just achieving the goal. Our decisions shape our lives. All decision making is value clarification. Most people worry about things that we can’t control. We can control the meanings that we give to other things. You get to determine the meaning of your life. Your purpose is something that you will be doing every single day. Are you doing the things that truly give you joy in life? Why are you doing what you’re doing? 7 reasons why people lose the game of life: They don’t know the purpose of the game Have too many rules on how others should be. People have reasons for their actions. Your rules are in conflict. You ask yourself stupid questions You break your rules and you get pleasure. Also, you do everything right and you don’t get pleasure. Don’t give up your dignity. Everyone else has different rules People play it as if it’s a life or death situation. 7 things to win at the game of life: Decide present purpose of life – should be something you can achieve every day, not just when you die Have fewer rules Make your rules consistent Give themselves pleasure whenever they win even if the world doesn’t Give yourself pain when you don’t stick to your rules Now that other people have different rules and figure them out Don’t take yourself too seriously What did you want to do when you grew up? What feeling did you want? Workbook
What I wanted to be when I grew up: Doctor – really achieve things that few people do and change people’s life significantly Engineer – Feel intelligent and significant, figure out how things work, put together different mechanisms to get a desired outcome The purpose of my life: Love others and help them improve their life by supporting them and being an example of how amazing life can be.
This was the final day from Get the Edge. I really hope you found this hub useful and really thought about the ideas talked about! Please take a look at Days 1-6 in my other hubs! Each day is on improving a different aspect on your life. Please give comments or ask questions. If you found this valuable: "Vote Up" & Fill out "Was this hub...". Also, read my other hubs, follow me, subcribe to my RRS feed & bookmark this hub. Thank you for taking this journey with me, Jane Doe