Gay Adoption

Running Head: GAY ADOPTION

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Pro‟s and Con‟s of Gay Adoption Brittany Stipes Sociology of the Family 3346-950 November 23rd, 2011

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Abstract

Gay Adoption is a huge controversy in America. Many people can come up with numerous reasons to why they think gay adoption is right or wrong. America has just recently started to accept the gay community a little more but when it comes to them marring and creating families that‟s when people start to create opinions. Some people believe as long as a child or children are in a loving home, taken care of, and happy then there shouldn‟t be a problem with two males or females being the parent, others believe that since it is two men or two women parenting a child they could confuse a child about the gender roles in our society. We will never know who is right or wrong it is all opinions and it‟s up to you on what you believe.

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Pro‟s and Con‟s of Gay Adoption If you look up the term gay in the dictionary you will get many different results such as homosexual, carefree, cheerful, and brilliant. But in this case the definition we need is homosexual. To be a homosexual you have to have a sexual attraction to a member of the same sex. If you have sexual attractions to members of the opposite sex and members of the same sex you are considered to bisexual and if you have sexual attractions to members of the opposite sex only you are considered to be heterosexual. If you‟re a woman and you‟re attracted to other women, you are considered a homosexual or as we like to call them lesbians. The same homosexual term applies to men but the common term we call them is gay. When you are gay and you meet the special person you love and want to spend the rest of your life with, marry and start a family with, the process can seem to be quite challenging ordeal. Gay marriage is in the news almost every week with different issues, ether dealing with the government and a party coming up with a new reason to why it is right or wrong or just random opinions. America has just recently started to accept the gay community more but when it comes to them marring and creating families that‟s when people start to create opinions. Our country is still considered very religious. even though less than half of us actually attend church. Religion is a huge reason to why a lot of people who think that gay adoption is wrong. When it comes to gay adoption, this becomes a controversial subject. Some people believe as long as a child or children are in a loving home, taken care of, and happy then there shouldn‟t be a problem with two males or females being the parent, others believe that since it is two men or two women parenting a child they could confuse a child about the gender roles in our society. As you can tell this is quite the controversy but after finding out the pro‟s and con‟s gay adoption you can form your own

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opinions. There are many pro‟s to gay adoption, that can most definitely be argued, but what we all need to think about is what is in the best interest of the child or children. Pro‟s to Gay Adoption When you find a child a home that wouldn‟t have had one without a gay parent or parents it is more beneficial to the child to be with them, compared to them staying in the foster-care system or being in an orphanage. There are thousands upon thousands of children in the fostercare system. "So many gay and lesbian parents are adopting from the child welfare system. They are so interested in becoming parents that they are willing to take children others are not… if people are going to hold a narrow opinion of who can adopt, they are sentencing some children to a life without a loving home” (Kreisher). If someone is willing to give a child a loving home and they have to means to provide for the child, most people would think, what‟s the problem with that? If you, as a gay parent, have no other way to make a child then adopting usually is your only way to go. There has been nothing found that is not just an opinion that states that gay or lesbian couples are not fit to be parents in the long run. Gay and lesbian couples usually, in most cases, provide a more stable household for children. Most gay couples tend to stay together compared to the number of heterosexual couples that either break up or divorce, leaving the child in a single parent household. Gay parents are just as present in the child‟s life as straight parents and care about the children the same amount. Children do not care if you are gay, straight, black, white, red, or orange. They need a loving household that is going to provide them with the necessities in life. You can‟t judge a person because their gay and determine if whether they will be a good parent or not. To determine if someone will be a fit parent or not you need to go off of the quality of the person, how they react

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with others and the child, if they are going to be able to support the child and give him or her what they need to survive, and most important if they will be able to love their future child like he or she was her own. Parenting is an extreamly difficult task and if you can find some that is qualified to be a parent to a child without one, then why stop them. To tell a gay man or woman that they can‟t have a child because they are gay is discrimination that is based on sexual orientation. If you looked at that same statement in a work setting it just would not be acceptable. Discrimination against anyone is wrong but discriminating against someone that can‟t help who they are is not right either. Gay couples help our society out in a huge way. When a gay couple adopts a child in the foster-care system they are helping all of us out. Most foster-care systems are run by our government. When the foster-care systems need money they get it from the government and the government gets the money from all of us through our tax dollars. The more gay couples and straight couple that adopt threw the foster-care system helps all of us out because the tax money that isn‟t used can go to help something else. Con‟s to Gay Adoption Because we live in a „Christian‟ society, our values tend to be based on the „Christian bible and principles. In the bible it states that marriage is between a man and a woman. “If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them” ( Leviticus 20:13, New International Version). The bible is suppose to be God‟s word and „Christians‟ usually take it pretty seriously and just because they bible says that marriage is between a man and a woman, when it comes to gay adoption they tend to judge.

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Children at a young age tend to judge others and bully. Children with gay parents are at risk of getting bullied and discriminated against. There are ways to cope with your child being bullied and teased. You can educate your child on other children in their situation and show them how to properly handle the situation when they are getting bullied. Even though that may be true, Dean Byrd, PhD, says that “Children raised by non-heterosexual parents are placed at risk. They are more apt to experience gender and sexual confusion; they are more apt to become promiscuous; they are at greater risk of losing a parent to AIDS, substance abuse or suicide. They suffer more depression and other emotional difficulties. They are also more likely to engage in same-sex behavior” (Byrd). That statement may be true for some of the children that come from gay parents but not all. Conclusion Children in the foster-care system have three options to be adopted by a straight couple/person, a gay couple/person, or not adopted at all and age out of the foster-care system. Since us Americans have just recently started accepting gay and lesbian couples in our society, it is going to take a while before they have the same rights and freedoms as straight couples. We are moving in the right direction though. Gay couples are now able to have their own clubs and be free about who they are. As for marriage and adoption, it is going to take a while for everyone in the country to accept the idea because of the huge role religion plays on our country.

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Berkowitz, D. and Marsiglio, W. (2007), Gay Men: Negotiating Procreative, Father, and Family Identities. Journal of Marriage and Family, 69: 366–381. doi: 10.1111/j.17413737.2007.00371. x Byrd, D.. (2006, Apr. 20). Pediatrics Group Endorses Homosexual Adoption ...But New Policy Places Children at Risk. NARTH Retrieved Nov. 23, 2011, from narth.com. Kreisher, K. (2002, Jan.). Gay Adoption. Children‟s Voice, Retrieved Nov. 22, 2011, from http://www.cwla.org/articles/cv0201gayadopt.htm Leviticus 20:13. The Holy Bible: New International Version, copyright 1977 by the International Bible Society. Meezan, William. & Rauch, Jonathan, 1960-. (2005). Gay marriage, same-sex parenting, and America's children. The Future of Children 15(2), 97-113. Retrieved November 23, 2011, from Project MUSE database Michael J. Rosenfeld. (2010). Nontraditional families and childhood progress through school. Demography 47(3), 755-775. Retrieved November 22, 2011, from Project MUSE database. Miriam Smith. (2010). Gender politics and the same-sex marriage debate in the united states. Social Politics: International Studies in Gender, State and Society 17(1), 1-28. Retrieved November 23, 2011, from Project MUSE database. Riggs, Damien W. (2007). Reassessing the foster-care system: Examining the impact of heterosexism on lesbian and gay applicants. Hypatia 22(1), 132-148. Retrieved November 23, 2011, from Project MUSE database.

GAY ADOPTION Daniel Rivers. (2010). “In the best interests of the child”: Lesbian and gay parenting custody cases, 1967–1985. Journal of Social History 43(4), 917-943. Retrieved November 23, 2011, from Project MUSE database. Sanders, Douglas. (1996). Getting lesbian and gay issues on the international human rights agenda. Human Rights Quarterly 18(1), 67-106. Retrieved November 23, 2011, from Project MUSE database.

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