Entheogenic Visions by Stewart Mosher

June 22, 2016 | Author: Solipsist Ant | Category: N/A
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Entheogenic Visions One Man’s Exploration of Psychedelics By Stewart Allen Mosher Copyright 2012 Look up on Youtube.com: Psychedelic Art by Stewart www.entheogenicvisions.com Email: [email protected]

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Contents Dedication To Warning!!! Introduction: Flash Backs. Haiti: Operation Secure Tomorrow 2004 Preface Chapter 1: My introduction to Salvia Divinorum How should Salvia be used? What are you seeking to gain from using Salvia? Chapter 2: Sequence of Event that Prepared Me for Entheogens Chapter 3: The Introverted Experiences - Salvia Divinorum - The 1st Entheogen 1st Time/Salvia 10x/ “Welcome” 2nd Time/Salvia 15x/water pipe/ “Disrupting the Flow” 3rd Time/Salvia 20x/ “Pushing Me towards Her” 4th Time/Salvia 30x/ “Sticking Together” 5th Time/Salvia 30x/ “Putting Me to Sleep” 6th Time/Salvia 5x, 15x/ “Seeing as One” 7th Time/Salvia 5x, 10x and 15x/ “Future Journey” 8th Time/Salvia 10x/ “Having Fun” 9th Time/Salvia Tincture, two separate hits of 5x/ “Waiting to Be Born” 10th Time/Salvia 5x, 20x/ “I Will Meet Them” 11th Time/Salvia 20x/ “I Will Walk” 12th Time/Salvia 20x/ “Dashiki” 13th Time/Salvia 20x/ “Soul Retrieval” 14th Time/Salvia 20x/ “Puffs of Dimensions” 15th Time/Salvia 20x/ “The Golden Party” Friends 1st Time/Salvia 30x/ “Mysterious Lady” 16th Time/ Salvia 10x/ “Double Vision”

Chapter 4: The Extroverted Experiences 17th and 18th Time/Salvia 30x/ “Confusion”—“Finding My Center” 19th Time/Salvia 30x/ “Going Beyond” 20th Time/Salvia 40x/ “Infinity” Bo’s 1st Time with Salvia 21st Time/Salvia 40x/ “Tree” 22nd-23rd-24th Time/Salvia 40x/ “DNA Within” 25th Time with visuals and 26th Time with body possession/Salvia 40x-30x/ “Mr. and Ms. Salvia” 2

27th Time/Salvia 60x/ “The Source of Consciousness” 28th Time/Salvia 60x/ “Access Denied From the Fourth Dimension” 29th-30th Time/Salvia 80x/ “Trying to See My True Self” – “Still Trying to See My True Self” 31st Time/Salvia 10x/ “Indians That Tried To Help Me in an OBE” 32nd Time/Salvia 10x/ “Shattered Image” 33rd Time/Salvia 10x-40x/ “Nothing Happened” – “Las Vegas Friends First Time” 34th Time/Salvia 10x-40x/ “It’s Ok” 35th Time/Salvia Purple Sticky 10x(two times)/20x of Dragon Salvia/ “Face to Face and Beyond” 36th Time/Salvia 30x/ “Too Late to Say Goodbye” 37th Time/Regular Salvia four Times-One hit of 10x/ “When You Die” 38th Time/Plain Salvia (un-enhanced-regular leaf chopped up) Four hits-then one hit of 10x of Purple Sticky (not my personal favorite brand)/ “Contacting a Friends Deceased Father” 39th Time/Salvia 10x/ “Spirits Centering My Energy” 40th Time/Salvia 20x/ “Take Me Out of Here” 41st Time/Salvia 20x/ “I Know; We Got Our Hands on You” Chapter 5: Inocybe Mushroom (Shrooms) – The 2nd Entheogen 1st Shroom Trip (Inocybe Mushroom)/four small stems and two caps/ “Lifetime of Education in 4 to 6 hours” 2nd Shroom Trip (Inocybe Mushroom)/four real big stems, one small stem, one monster size cap, and one medium size cap/ “Connected to the Universal Consciousness” Chapter 6: Dimethyltryptamine (DMT) – The 3rd Entheogen 1st Time/DMT/ “Light Realm” 2nd Time/DMT/ “Realities Collide” 3rd Time/DMT/ “Spirit Machine” 4th Time/DMT/ “Molecular Love” 5th Time/DMT/ “Spirits Within” 6th Time/DMT/ “Nothing Out There” 7th Time/DMT/ “Inside the Ship” 8th Time/DMT/ “Soul Growth” 9th Time/DMT/ “The Moment in Time” 10th Time/DMT/ “Illusionary Boundary” 11th Time/DMT/ “3rd Eye Transformation” Chapter 7: Lysergic Acid Diethylamide (LSD) – The 4th Entheogen Chapter 8: From Skeptic to Believer Back to the Search 42nd Time/Chewed on dry Salvia leaves first, then smoked Salvia Zone Green Level/ “Spirit Time Travel Machine” 3

43rd Time/Residue of DMT and Salvia 80x/ “All That Matters” 12th Time/DMT/ “The Ra Connection” 13th Time/DMT and Salvia 10x/ “Quantum Jump” 14th Time/DMT/ “See You On The Dark Side of The Moon” 44th Time/Salvia 10x/ “Let’s Go” 45th Time/Shroom Tea-Salvia 10x/ “Vibration Connection” Chapter 9: Cannabis (Queen Tetra, Pot, Marijuana, Hemp, ect…) – The 5th Entheogen Queen Tetra (Cannabis)/ “I’m Laid Back and Chillin” Chapter 10: Iboga Journey – Reveling My Whole Life - The 6th Entheogen Chapter 11: Spice (JWH-018) - The 7th Entheogen Where Does Consciousness Come From? (Dream) Funky Monkey-XXXX Chapter 12: Queen Tetra (Cannabis) Experiences for One Year Chapter 13: Moving Further LSD Trip with the Dragonflies Rice for One Week Queen Tetra and DMT/ “All Seeing” 15th -17th Times/DMT Hits at the Power Spot/ “Let Out My Light” – “Becoming Formless” – “Dimensional Ship Spot” Ideas and Dreams Chapter 14: The Jaguar Path: Yoga and Peruvian Shamanism Jaguar Journeys by Ray H. Crist (CD) Finding My Serpent Rock with Queen Tetra as My Ally Chapter 15: Find Yourself and Save the Planet Several Shrooms, Eight Hits of LSD, Two Licks of MDMA, Queen Tetra Vapor Hits several hours later/ “Love to the Universe; Love to the Earth” Chapter 16: Ayahuasca - The 8th Entheogen 1st Time/Ayahuasca/ “I’m Healed Ten Fold” 2nd Time/Ayahuasca/ “I’m Freeded” 46th Time/Yellow Zone Salvia/ “Bob are You Out There?” 47th Time/Yellow Zone Salvia/ “Hold On” – Bob Dream of Bob’s Full Transformation 3rd Time/Ayahuasca/ “The Power from Everything” 4

4th Time/Ayahuasca, four spoonful’s/ “I’m the 1%” 5th Time/Ayahuasca, five spoonful’s/ “I’m Reborn” Conclusion Psychedelic Pyramid Guide of Enlightenment Appendix A

Dedication To: This book is dedicated to all those who want the spiritual freedom to explore the spirit realm themselves with the use of entheogens, to all who are currently in our prison system for non-violent drug crimes, to all those who could have their PTSD greatly diminished, to all those who would greatly benefit from the use of Cannabis for medical purposes, to all those who could have a greater hope of getting rid of their addiction to harmful narcotics such as heroin, crack, meth, etc. with the use of Iboga, to all those who have gone before me in speaking out against the ridiculous drug laws that are currently in place and to all those who made this book possible. Warning!!! Warning!!! Warning!!! This book contains graphic langue and the use of illegal schedule 1 Drugs. This book is for educational purposes only. Anything that the reader does is at their own risk. So get ready to take a trip with me beyond comprehension, and hold onto your marbles as you dive into my mind.

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Introduction Flash Backs Haiti: Operation Secure Tomorrow 2004

Flash Shus… shuchs… shush…: static CNN TV Rebels are advancing on the Capital. President Jean-Bertrand Aristide says that the US won’t intervene… Bush is a racist… More…Killing…looting….US Marines may be deployed to restore peace. Bang Bang Bang “Wake the fuck up, get dressed, and get outside.” “What the fuck, its 2:30 in the morning.” “We’re going.” Back Early fall morning, walking to school. Everyone is talking on their cell phones. Flash First week securing the airport. Sleeping with football size rats, and my green ISO mat, C130’s coming in with its roaring engines every hour to wake me from my sweaty sleep. I’m just a hamburger patty on this hot ass runway, and I can’t get any fucking sleep. Back Sitting in math class with four plain white walls that surround my boredom. Flash Worried faces, hearts pounding in our chests that won’t be heard past the flack jackets. Heading to our new home for the next four months (we don’t know that yet), arriving at Port-Au-Prince, the capital of Haiti. Back Driving my car home, listening to the sound track of Resident Evil. Flash The streets have the end of the world look. Garbage is burning, filling the streets with a choking smoke. I can’t even see the Marine next to me. Can’t fucking breathe. Let’s fucking get going. Cars flipped on their side torched and stripped of everything. Trash blocking intersections. A three legged dog crawls through, stopping to tear into the remains of a human body. In the shadows of the night I nearly step on a Haitian woman sleeping with a blanket on the sidewalk. Moving on, I think she is in the shadow of all our minds, including the world and heaven. Fuck that. There is no heaven. 6

Back Sitting on my steps reading my mail. The sun shines into my eyes! Is there a heaven? Flash Bullshitting on some steps with some Marine friends. Distant gun shots ring out. “Yea get some,” I say. Bang Crack Swoosh Snap They’re fucking attacking us. Everyone is low crawling, but not me. I run crouching, thinking of just two things: will I get to my gear before they are over the fence, or am I going to get shot in the head. Marines are leaping over each other like frogs to get to the next lily pad. Staying low now, putting on my flack and Kevlar, I see Ferguson standing putting on his flack. “Ferguson, get the fuck down! “Ferguson get down!” My screams are pleading, nearly crying for him not to get shot.

Moments later “We’re heading to an army base. They have a better medical facility for Milton.”

Several more moments later Driving in the night. Crack “What the fuck was that?”, “Someone shot our window!”

Hours Later Laughing…”Milton, you’re going home man. You are going to get a lot of ass for this.” “The bullet hit my wrist and traveled along my bone coming out here at my elbow,” Milton’s raspy drugged up voice said. Taking pictures, tubes, beeping, more joking with our squad that brought him here. More beeping of medical equipment. “All right man, have fun back in the states you lucky fuck” “We’ll see you when we get back,” if we get back! Hanging out on the back of the Humvee in the middle of the night waiting to go back, some Army officer fuck comes up to us and says something like he knows what’s going on. He’s sleeping back here at a nice Army base fifteen miles north of Port-Au-Prince in a bed with white sheets, taking a hot shower every day, talking to females on a regular basis, eating good food, breathing cleaner air, never going on patrols getting shot at. He’s not seeing the shit we see or stepping in the shit we step in day in and day out. Fuck his rank. He doesn’t have a fucking clue, poge son of a bitch. Back Taking a hot shower at home.

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Flash Ah cold. It’s fucking freezing cold. Black dirt running off my body going down the drain; weeks of dirt are finally washed off. I feel like I have skin again. Back Dan Rather the CBS evening news anchor announcing another fallen Hero; Those Mother Fuckers. Flash Turning into the Canadian embassy with two Humvees. Shots fired. “Get out they’re shooting” Behind the gates I see a Marine dragging a shot Haitian inside the perimeter, “Doc, you need help?” “Yea, do you have a pressure bandage?” “Here.” “There’s no exit”. I can see the small hole where the bullet tore through his back. Sobering now, the Haitian looks up at me and asks “why.” Taking a step back I ask myself the same thing. I don’t know why. I don’t think anybody knows why. Back My sister complaining about supper… Flash Standing guard at the west side post of the palace. Chirping of bugs, but it’s as silent as night. I’m tired and so are they. The homeless boy wearing only his oversized yellow dirty shirt and under sized shorts wakes up from time to time from the uncomfortable cement curve. The darkness in this world won’t let him sleep in peace. But his stomach is not churning as much from hunger. He shared the crackers and Peanut butter with two other boys; it was all I had. Back Seeing and hearing these college kids talk; not having a care in the world like they’re still in high school. They still have their innocence about them. I wish I still had mine. The knowledge of this world changed me. Now I feel detached from the people I used to know. I sometimes think the feeling is mutual. Driving by that same drifter walking on Route 4 with his long white beard weighing his drooping head, having nowhere to go but back and forth along this road getting smoke puffed on him by cars. Sometimes I feel like him, going back and forth having nowhere to go. But I do have somewhere to go, and for that I am grateful. Flash Thousands of Haitian protesters are disappearing into the rest of the city as unseen shots are fired into the crowd. Running to my Platoon Sergeant to see if he needs our team for anything I see some Marines carrying in wounded Haitians to be triaged. Their cries stop me for a moment as I stare at their bloody bodies. A Marine comes next to me and starts taking pictures of them. I think how disrespectful it is to do that and continue to look for my Platoon Sargent. Last one jumping on the back of the Humvee looking into the eyes of my team. The look on their faces was like they were never going to see me again. Accelerating now with my feet dangling out the back, we swerved out of the palace grounds. “Stop! Get out, post security”

Splattered brain

on the sidewalk. 8

Reporters hovering over the shot Haitian, taking pictures; no different than flies buzzing over a pile of dung. I run to the side of a LAR (light armored reconnaissance vehicle) taking a knee for cover; can’t feel my body. Hearing bullets cracking through the air and impacting the pavement all around me; “Mosher, let’s go” someone yelled. I’m bounding back to the Humvee, but they’re hauling ass back. Who is thinking straight? Moving deeper into the city looking for four shot Haitian police, I see bullet holes everywhere, in car windows, building walls and windows, everywhere. Behind us a LAR is rounding a corner receiving gun fire. They’re shooting back from what looks like the second floor. That could have been me. Heading back to the palace we run into some small crowds. Their red eyes are filled with rage, yelling and pointing for us to go back to get the shot Haitian police. Berg yells to Staff Sergeant for us to go back. I tell him “fuck that, they’re probably already dead.” That’s if they were even out there. Back inside the palace grounds, getting out of the Humvee, I feel shaky but lucky to be alive. Back I hope that I can make peace with my memories. Have them wash down the drain like the first few weeks of filth that I acquired in Haiti. I never want to see another fallen hero being announced by another Dan Rather again. Click Blackness……………………………

…Three years later I began my psychedelic journey that would heal these old wounds, transforming my perception of reality from illogical chaos to that of a magical wonder.

Preface 9

One of my goals for writing this book is to bring a balance to the subject matter of Salvia Divinorum and to prevent the outlawing of this plant. As I am writing this, there are only negative connotations associated with this plant, and from my personal experiences it deserves none. I will argue and fight the claims made by main stream news media as to why they think Salvia Divinorum should be made illegal. I shall counter these dissenters with my personal stories and pictures, with what I’ve seen. Hopefully by showing you the powerful potential Salvia has in exploring your true self, I will inspire others to investigate this plant and to speak out against the absurd witch hunt that is going on against it. There are other entheogens (substances used to help you find your inner God) that I have also tried, including Inocybe Mushroom (Shrooms), DMT, LSD, Queen Tetra (Cannabis), Iboga, JWH-018 (Spice), and Ayahuasca, that I also would like to see taken off the Schedule 1 list and made legal. All of these entheogens helped in giving me another perspective of reality, myself, and how lucky I am to be a part of the grand illusion of thought. Before continuing I need you to take a deep breath and ponder this quote by Frank Zappa, “Minds are like Parachutes, they only work when they’re open”. So without a further ado I leave you to the beginning of my journey, the exploration of consciousness.

Chapter 1 My introduction to Salvia Divinorum 10

One late night at work a friend of mine introduced me to a legal entheogenic plant on Wikipedia called Salvia Divinorum. He did not say much because of the proximity of our co-workers, but he did say that he would like to try it with me if I were to buy some. He denied prior usage, but after several conversations I sensed that he had tried it; for his sake I will not divulge why I think this. I did, however, feel very privileged that I was the only person he had shown this side to. Even though Salvia has hit the news in recent years, it still seems that very few people know about it. I had been learning a lot about shamans using a brew called Ayahuasca for spiritual insights and felt that I might be able to use Salvia for the same purpose, but legally. It boggles my mind how Ayahuasca, a combination of two natural plants, is illegal because it contains DMT, a chemical which is produced by our very own brains. After researching Salvia for a few weeks I finally decided to purchase some. Soon the moment would be at hand when I would have my own experience and opinions of this plant. While the majority of Youtube videos depicted Salvia in a negative light, there were a few that took an objective look at the plant, namely “Salvia Divinorum Study 1-5". I also encountered favorable coverage of Salvia on ‘Wikipedia.’ I already had a hunch that the main stream news had twisted and warped the perceptions of this topic. In the following pages you will read about what I and others had experienced while using this plant. My only agenda is to show people what this one out of more than four hundred of the psychoactive plants that flourishes on this planet can do for your life. This incredible journey of mine all started with a friend that brought Salvia Divinorum into my awareness. The ironic part is that he will never know that I used this plant until years later. My journey with entheogens would last nearly four years before I reached the true understanding of who I really am. How should Salvia be Used? In this section I’m going to tell you all the tips and tricks that I learned to get the most out of the Salvia experience. You’ll find similar information scattered here and there throughout the book, but I fused it all here to make a point in this segment. The first thing to consider is your health. Like Ayahuasca, Salvia has a detoxifying effect. In my case, for the first five to ten sessions, I perspired profusely. I feel fortunate that I only suffered from perspiration. I know of someone who was much less fortunate, who experienced nausea and vomiting as well as sweating. He had some of the worst health habits one can have. He would smoke a pack of cigarettes a day, eat too much junk food, and generally pay no attention to the type of fuel he was adding to his precious, one-of-a-kind engine. The point of the matter is that maintaining a healthy lifestyle is vital, in general, but especially when exploring Salvia. In my personal opinion the major reason he had a bad experience was because he frequently smokes cigarettes and that Salvia was purging all the toxins out of his body. I would suggest that if you are considering using Salvia, that you examine your health habits before starting. I don’t mean to scare everyone into thinking that Salvia will make you sick. I’ve also seen six other people use it with similar effects as my own 11

(ie. sweating). Although, I do believe that if you are on a spiritual journey your body must be as healthy as possible for optimal success. The biggest personal tip that I can give you is to not mix alcohol with Salvia. If you think your regular liquor spins are bad, you haven’t seen anything until you’ve mixed the two. This is why Salvia should not be considered a party drug. It shouldn’t be considered something only to get a high for it has the potential of showing you who you truly are. Salvia has medicinal effects, and could be a key to unlocking certain doors of perception and should be treated with respect and only used with the intent of furthering one’s own personal spiritual growth. The next thing to consider is how you are going to acquire Salvia and at what strength/dosage. You can find everything you need online by doing a little research. I have to say that my personal favorite web site to find Salvia is www.shamanic-extracts.com, and that I like to stay between 5x and 20x. I give this range because the experience does not get any better the higher you go (the “x” stands for how many leaves were used to coat one leaf of its juices. Hence 5x is five times the potency of the original plant and the higher the x, the more it costs.) Despite my advice, your own curiosity may lead you in another direction and that’s fine. In addition to smoking Salvia, you can chew the leaves, said to be the best way to do it due to the fact that the experience will last three times longer. I have done this and all I got out of the experience was a bad taste. Maybe the plant was too young. I also bought the tincture. It is said that the best way to use the tincture is to mix about the same amounts of boiling water to ten drops of the tincture and hold this mixture under your tongue for as long as you can. The water is added to take the burn out from the alcohol. I’ve also heard that you may have to do several doses using the tincture for a period of twenty minutes to get any effect at all. I tried this method and also using the tincture without any water, having only a very mild effect. So far I just prefer to smoke it. The next aspect to consider is what device you are going to use, if you are going to inhale it. There are three devices that you could use for inhaling Salvia: 1) A vaporizer, which is the most expensive and supposedly works the best. In my experience it did not work at all. 2) A water-pipe. 3) A regular pipe, which can hold a screen. While shopping for my first pipe I ran into an interesting situation with one of the sales persons when I asked to see a water bong. He quickly corrected me by telling me that it was illegal to say “bong,” because it implies that I am looking for a device to smoke weed. The proper terminology is “water pipe.” A water pipe is good for taking the burn out, but there is a loss of potency while the smoke goes through the water. There is a technique that I use to take the burn from hitting your lungs using a pipe. My first pipe was of the flat ceramic type. It had a gold painted star around the area where you place the contents to be smoked, while the rest was painted blue. The pipe in general was flat. This made it easy to lay on a flat surface without it tipping over after I took a hit. Unlike a pot pipe, which has a bigger hole, a Salvia pipe will need to have a screen because it is so finely chopped. There are brass and steel screens available. Brass is cheaper but will not last as long 12

as steel. Now the trick to avoid burning your lungs from the hot smoke when you inhale the Salvia, is to hold it in your mouth for a second or two. After a second or two, the smoke will be cool enough to inhale. Once inhaled, hold the smoke in your lungs for as long as you can. Try going for at least 30 to 45 seconds. You should then be transported to the Salvia realm before you exhale all of the smoke. Once you’ve got the materials and the Salvia, you’ll need to consider where, when, and with whom (if anyone) you will do this with. You should also consider what you are seeking to gain from Salvia. I’ve learned that having your mind set or concentrating on something will have a direct impact on what you’ll experience. I believe that there are two places best suited for experiencing Salvia: a dark room or the woods. I’ve found it best to try Salvia in as dark a place as possible. Now some people have said to me that they can have visions with their eyes open, however, in my case I need to have my eyes shut. I’ve learned that it is essential to be comfortable while doing Salvia, otherwise it somehow becomes inactive. I will give an example of this later on. Time is also an important thing to consider. For one, you don’t want anything that needs your immediate attention. You need to give Salvia your undivided attention. Even though the Salvia trip only takes five to ten minutes, if you have other things on your mind, they will influence your experience. Finally, you need to consider how alert you are. Salvia has been known to cause a slight fatigue. One way in which to prevent this from happening is to smoke Red Ball, an herb sold by a company called Experience, which also sells Salvia. Red Ball gives you energy like coffee, but without the dehydrating effect. You should smoke Red Ball approximately twenty minutes before smoking Salvia, as that is about how long it will take for you to feel the effects of the Red Ball. With whom you decide to share your Salvia experience with is another aspect you need to consider. I was a little anxious trying this for the first time by myself but I also did not have anyone that I could truly trust to watch over me. I watched some YouTube videos of people giving their opinions on this subject matter. One person said there was nothing to fear by doing it alone, unless you have some bad music (with negative lyrics) and/or background sounds. In my experience he was completely right. Noise will have an effect on what you see, but you lose that sense once you are fully in the Salvia world. If you do have a sitter, it is important for them to be quiet and respectful of your journey. Sitters are merely there to make sure you don’t hurt yourself. Your chances of safety can be increased by laying down right after inhaling the smoke. Then I’ll put the pipe on my dresser and turn off any lights. Once I release the Salvia from my lungs I’ll lay down on my bed. If you live in a noisy environment, I suggest playing some music to counteract the outside noises. However, it is best if there is little to no sound at all. I did use a CD called “Detaching the World”, Vol. 1, track “Tranquil Sunrise” which seemed fitting for a Salvia trip, as the music lasted for twenty five minutes, and while the trip itself only five to ten minutes. It’s nice to have music that doesn’t stop half way through a trip. The first few times that I did Salvia I listened to this, and thought it was perfect for the occasion. It’s instrumental, and makes you feel as though you are already entering the spirit world. If you do listen to any music I would suggest using some type of meditation music, and nothing with any vocals. I’ll 13

explain why this is important later on in the book. State of mind is important, including knowing what it is you are seeking to gain from using Salvia. Mental stability is important for a good experience. Salvia acts as a mirror to our minds. So learn about and be comfortable with yourself before trying Salvia. A good way to get yourself grounded before doing Salvia is to take time for yourself as much as you can. Take a walk alone in nature to sort out the confusion that manifests in your life. I believe in the Law of Attraction, that your state of mind holds the power to create your personal reality. What are you seeking to gain from using Salvia? When I first started using Salvia, I knew that there was something more to my life than what I had experienced, yet I didn’t know the right questions to ask. Each time I did Salvia the pieces started to form a picture revealing to me that I was truly searching for ‘peace’. I’ve never really known peace. There has always been a struggle or hurdle. I now believe that obstacles were put there by myself. I received a lot of personal insight into who I am from my use of Salvia. For now, you must ask yourself what it is you are searching for. After doing your first Salvia session you will be able to decide whether or not you will want do it again. If you think you will do it again, I would suggest documenting your experiences. Documentation may help reveal more answers for yourself, and later can be used as a guide in tracking your progress in the direction you want to go. Now to recap how I use Salvia: first, I think of what I want to see or what kind of question that I want to have answered. I then say this to myself over and over for a few minutes while at the same time getting the Salvia and pipe out. If I’m in my room I’ll sit on my bed and take a couple of deep breaths before taking a hit. Once I take a hit I leave the smoke in my mouth for one or two seconds before inhaling it. I then try to hold the smoke in my lungs as long as possible (usually 30 to 45 seconds). While I’m holding in the smoke I will put the pipe on my dresser while I continue to focus on what I’m searching for. Once I finally exhale I will lay down on my bed, which I highly recommend so you do not lose your balance and hurt yourself. After about 5 or 10 minutes, after the effects of Salvia have worn off, I immediately write down what had just transpired and draw the images that I see to the best of my ability. The reason I immediately jot down my experience is so that I don’t forget any of the details. Writing about my experiences also helps me to figure out the answer to my original question. Much is revealed during the Salvia trip, and if you write about and draw what you have experienced, you may discover something you had not noticed before. Chapter 2 Sequence of Events that Prepared Me for Entheogens This chapter is going to be a glimpse of what I think had a significant influence on how I used and perceived what I saw while using Salvia. Over the years I have begun to see that there is a synchronicity to my life. Everything in retrospect seemed to have happened in a 14

certain order, unperceived at the time, yielding results which, were perfectly timed and, were learning moments. By learning, we as individuals evolve into more conscious beings, eventually realizing our true nature and where we all fit into the grand scheme of things. I’ll start first with what made me begin to question whether or not there is a higher power running our world. My last four months in the Marines I was deployed to Haiti, surrounded by misery, death and chaos. During this time I began to wonder how all of this could be happening if there truly is a divine creator. By the end of my tour, I concluded that there is no such thing. I believe the extreme misery that I witnessed in Haiti is what motivated me to find some logical explanation for why things are the way they are. Three months after getting out of the Marines, I was reading my mail on my front steps, looking up into the autumn sun and thinking there must be something responsible for the creation of this reality. Since that day, I’ve gathered quite a bit of information through books and the internet about the spirit world. Eventually I tried Salvia, shrooms, DMT, LSD, Queen Tetra (Cannabis), Iboga, JWH-018 (Spice) and Ayahuasca in attempts to learn. My outlook on life has changed dramatically. I’m finally feeling an inner peace that I had never known before. There is much more to what these substances did for me, however, I will leave that for the end. You will find in appendix A a list of books, YouTube videos, music, movies, and web sites that helped guide me into using these substances in an intelligent way. Some of these references came before, some during and others after my spiritual journey but I feel they can all be beneficial in guiding you in the right direction. This information will give you a head start on preparing mentally for the exploration of yourself. It may also help you to develop a different perspective on psychedelic plants, helping you deal with the anxiety of the unknown before embarking on your mysterious entheogenic journey.

Chapter 3 The Introverted Experiences - Salvia Divinorum - The 1 st Entheogen 1 st Time/ Salvia 10x/“Welcome” The first time I tried smoking Salvia I was unsuccessful in going anywhere in the spirit realm. I went back to my computer and read the directions on the web site, www.shamaic-extracts.com. It told me that I needed to continue to smoke Salvia until I began to feel the effects. While this seemed simple enough, I eventually learned a trick to making 15

Salvia work off only one hit. The trick is to use 5x or higher of Salvia and when you inhale the smoke you must hold it in as long as you can. If you don’t, you may not be transported into the beyond. So I tried again. After taking several hits I started to laugh, not because anything was funny, but because I knew that I finally made the connection with Salvia. A sensation of being dipped into a warm bath came over me, starting from my toes and going all the way to the top of my head. Suddenly the music faded away and the visions started appearing once I closed my eyes. Time disappeared, and a feeling of being welcomed enveloped my entire being. The first image that came to me was of naked women running my way in what looked like the inside of veins. All of the women had long black hair and everything about them appeared normal with the exception of a red spirit glow superimposed on them. Once they vanished I began to fly through a tunnel that pulsated with different colors, predominantly blue and white, with geometric shapes fluttering on the outside. At one point, while I was going through this tunnel, I noticed a blue wrench twisting a bolt on the edge of the tunnel. I was projected out of the tunnel where I was met by what seemed like a spirit, which resembled the general concept of “Greys”1, with alien-shaped eyes and head, while the rest of the spirit’s face looked human. The whole face, including the eyes, was glowing yellow. It had two yellow worm-like extrusions, each with a black oval in the front of it, moving up the side of its face towards the top of its head. The spirit was looking down when I first saw it. It looked up at me and smiled. Then, it was as if time rewound itself and the spirit was looking back down again, only to raise its head and smile again. It repeated this three times before it stopped. While I was still looking at this smiling yellow face my eye was caught by hundreds of different colored souls that were flying within in the shape of a castle-like structure. Soon my vision faded to black, my meditation music slowly materialized in my ears once more. I became aware of my surroundings again. As I sat up in my bed, I was covered in sweat and realized that perhaps ten minutes had past. I knew I had truly experienced one of the most amazing moments in my life and had an overwhelming desire to do it again. However I did not try again until almost a week later, as I felt that I needed to synthesize and analyze this valuable moment in my life. Before I had started this session I did not ask an exact question, but was wondering where all the love was. It was so difficult for me to find someone I could love. After my experience I realized that love is everywhere, running towards me. Perhaps the wrench I saw was a symbol of fixing the connection between myself, emotion of love, and my connection to the spirit realm. I believe in some way the military had stifled that emotion in me. Now it was back. For the next several days after the experience, I felt more connected to everyone and felt 1 Grey aliens (or "Greys") are alleged extraterrestrial beings whose existence is promoted in ufological, paranormal, and New Age communities, named for their skin color. Paranormal claims involving Greys vary in every respect including their nature (ETs, extradimensionals, demons, or machines), origins, moral dispositions, intentions, and physical appearances (even varying in their eponymous skin color). A composite description derived from overlap in claims would have Greys as small-bodied sexless beings with smooth grey skin, enlarged head and large black eyes. The origin of the idea of the Grey is commonly associated with the Betty and Barney Hill abduction claim, although skeptics see precursors in science fiction and earlier paranormal claims.(from Wikipedia)

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that I was never truly alone in this world. 2 nd Time/Salvia 15x/water pipe/ “Disrupting the Flow” The Salvia entered my being, blowing out a vision of a red highway with cars zooming. A man was screaming as he was lifted from a car up to the sky. The highway then started to bend like the intestines of a stomach. Out of nowhere, a screaming face flew out at me, with a swarm of souls flying around it. After it came at me, it vomited a red liquid that covered its face. Suddenly, my vision was over. Just hours before this experience I had made a person upset because I had abruptly stopped in front of him. He was very angry, and I could see him in my rear view mirror yelling in his car. Making him angry affected everyone else in the vicinity without any of them even realizing it. We are all connected; our emotions can have an effect on those around us without their knowledge. Note: What you are thinking about or what you want to know about will be revealed to you while using Salvia. 3 rd Time/ Salvia 20x/“Pushing Me towards Her” Going into my third Salvia trip I had many questions in mind, but only one strong emotion: loneliness. I was tired of being alone. Once I entered the Salvia realm, I saw thousands of people pushing me over towards something. They were helping me to see another spirit object which had large blue eyes and was dividing red spirits into rows. I saw a hand of pure energy, crackling with blue and white electricity. There was a figure on this hand but because the bright light emitting from the figure, all I could see were its arms stretching towards me. I then opened my eyes and my hand was where I saw the hand in my vision. I had a picture of a girl on my wall that was in the same place as the spirit with outstretched arms. This experience showed me that we can perceive reality without our physical eyes only if we can open our third eye. I feel that spirits have an influence in this reality as well, though we can’t always perceive the results.

4 th Time/ Salvia 30x/“Sticking Together” This time I asked myself, ‘Is there life after death?’ The answer that I received was yes, there is life after death. I did not laugh like I usually did on trips. Maybe because it was too serious a question. The first thing I focused on was a white male with long blond hair waving in the wind as if he were spinning. He was holding a crowd of spirits back behind him. The crowd was out of focus with the whole background area being a pinkish-red color as were the people. I drifted down a black vortex of space where there was smoke drifting from where the spirit people were. The smoke started to form a dragon-like face that began chomping at me before completely vanishing. Maybe we are all being saved from something evil. There is life after death, but 17

perhaps there is a certain type of death that we should be afraid of. 5 th Time/Salvia 30x/“Putting Me to Sleep” As I was experimenting with Salvia for the fifth time I felt a certain warmness hit my whole being while I was holding the smoke in. The warmness ran up my body to my mouth. I did not even remember exhaling the smoke, and lost all sense of time. I saw a yelling crowd of red spirits running towards me and felt my body being pushed over by them. I remained there in my bed for about fifteen minutes until the drowsiness left me. I had felt like sleeping before this experience which I think had a major impact on my trip. This is a good experience to show how important it is to be well rested when you use Salvia. 6 th Time/ Salvia 5x, 15x/“Seeing as One” I demanded to see the light of consciousness. After taking the first hit of 5x, all I could see were red feet dangling from a tube that was suspended in darkness. This clearly did not satisfy my demand so I took another hit with the 15x; going back to the same vision. This time I saw two rows of red spirits that were pushing each other up until they merged into a single blue face that was looking into a bright light. I never saw the origin of this light as I was looking into a bent part of the tube and couldn’t see its source. I realized we can only see the light together and not as individuals. 7 th Time/ Salvia 5x, 10x, and 15x/“Future Journey” I had one question and one demand: I wanted to know who I had been before this life, and I wanted to be taken to the center of the Earth known as Agartha (inspired by a book that I was reading called “The Hollow Earth” by Raymond Bernard). I did not see my previous life, but began to do some sort of Indian chant that went: “Heya wa wa wa heha wa wa wa heya wa...”. I did this for about five minutes nonstop. Then I took a second hit of the 10x and was transported above the Earth in space. I could see my arms out in front of me. They were emitting a light red light. Clamped onto my arms were two hands from unseen bodies. They too glowed red. These hands were guiding me to another part of the planet with the sun at the horizon. As I went down into the Earth, my vision was fading, seeing an orange orb of what looked like the inner sun. I took a hit of 15x and was immediately transported above a crowd of people, all with black hair, and all in white suits. As I focused on a single face, the people split into two rows, one red and one blue. The two rows of people looped around toward a purple face, which consumed them until it all vanished into the darkness of my mind. As I was drawing the vision, I realized that the loop of people had made the sign of Pisces. It seemed Salvia had the ability to communicate to me by using symbols familiar to me. I felt when the end of this astrological age comes, I will be flown to the center of the Earth and greet these people. Once the Salvia wore off I tried to do the Indian chant that I was doing earlier, but was unsuccessful. 8 th Time/Salvia 10x/“Having Fun” 18

I did Salvia without asking any questions, as I was demonstrating the effects of the plant to a couple of friends. We were in a small enclosure. The vision started with a group of people with their hands up, flowing within the shape of the enclosure. As this was happening it seemed as if they were riding a roller coaster, screaming as they were going down. Each spirit was a different color and they all seemed to be having fun. It’s as if the spirit world takes its form based on our physical reality. 9 th Time/Salvia Tincture, 2 separate hits of 5x/“Waiting to be born” I want a perfect life with my soul mate and to have a son. My vision started as I exhaled the smoke into a double row of individuals in two lines, one led by a male in a white shirt and the other a female in a red shirt. The two lines coiled backward until there was a whole room of people crammed together. Everything changed into a purple color. The far end of this line ended in the eye of a big purple face that pressed into a cylindrical space, opening and closing its mouth. The vision faded into darkness. As I lay in my bed I felt there were millions of souls waiting to be born into this realm. I knew I am the only one that can make my dreams come true. The spirit realm, even though it may be trying to affect this reality, rarely does. 10 th Time/Salvia 5x, 20x/“I Will Meet Them” I asked what I should do for my future regarding the possible enaction of martial law in the US, and the depopulation agenda that may be implemented. Holding the 5x smoke deep in my lungs I was soon shown a cross-converging of red spirit faces that eventually got sucked into a dark swirling vortex. Unsatisfied with this answer I took one more hit of 20x. I then saw a huge group of red spirits that were separated, yet joining with, a group of blue spirits. At first I was happy to meet what I can only think of as the resistance to the New World Order (N.W.O.). Supposedly there is a list of people who are categorized by color depending on what threat level they are to the N.W.O. The people who are on the red list are those who will definitely resist the N.W.O. and will be taken before martial law is enacted. Those who are on the blue list are less of a threat than those on the red list but will still be taken after martial law has been imposed. Finally the ones that are on the yellow list are the ones that don’t know what is going on and will do as they’re told. But there will still be too many of them and a large part of the group will share the same fate as those who are on the red and blue list- death. There is a monument called the Georgia Guide Stones located at Elbert County, Georgia, USA. It states that the world population should be limited to five hundred million. That’s over a 90% reduction of the human population. Population suppression might be one of the N.W.O. goals. In my vision, it was only after meeting the blue resistance that I realized I was already dead. At this realization I stopped laughing, I felt speechless and without hope. While I was not afraid, I was definitely shocked and felt I had to do something to prevent this from happening. I must start preparing or else blackness will be my fate. Later, I thought of the Law of Attraction; I had to change my focus for that is what 19

shapes my world. I must remove myself from this doom and gloom of possibilities, and then create in my mind a utopian future. I also know that after my physical death I will continue to be aware, to perceive, to grow, to become something more. This life is just a step in my evolutionary process. I’m curious to know what it will be like when I’ve reached total awareness. 11 th Time/Salvia 20x/“I Will Walk” In my next experience, I questioned whether I should tell my friend Sean (who had told me of Salvia) about my experimentations. My vision showed a lattice work of red spirits over the earth and its surrounding space, as they were walking within a red grid. I started to laugh at the genius of the answer that I received and started yelling that “I will walk.” I saw that I would go to jail if I let him know about it. Despite Salvia being legal at the time I felt I would become a prisoner of not only the physical world, but the spiritual realm as well. I decided to hold off on telling him until a later time. 12 th Time/Salvia 20x/“Dashiki” I smoked Red Ball approximately thirty minutes before smoking Salvia. The first hit of Salvia did nothing, so I tried a second hit. Even then it seemed to take another moment before anything happened. I felt a faint ethereal force impact my head, pushing me back onto my bed. I saw what looked like the shape of a black man’s face, only green, and there were other spirits flying around on his face. Then with my right hand, I started to stroke and feel my own face. I started to ask my questions, but after a few reponses I realized that the answers were not coming from me but from this spirit. I asked if I was speaking with someone. The answer was yes. I asked for a name. He said his name was Dashiki and he had last been alive in the 40's. I asked if he was black. He said yes. I asked him if I was being possessed by him. He said yes. This answer scared me at first and I was wondering if I would ever be myself again. But he quickly answered back, “But we are separate and when we part we will be apart like before.” I asked how it was that he came to me. He said that he was just walking by and heard me asking questions that nobody asked anymore, and decided to answer them for me. He also wanted to remember what it was like to feel again. I kept stroking my face even though I had no control over my hand. I realized there must be thousands of souls wandering around until it’s their time to come back to this dimension. I asked if he had time to speak with me. He just laughed and said that there is no such thing as time here. So I proceeded to ask questions. First I asked if I should contact this old high school crush of mine and leave my current location. He said yes, I should leave and stay with her as things are going to get bad and I should never leave her. I asked what I will do about work. He just laughed again saying that “You will find good work, you always do”. It seemed he felt a job was of little or no importance. I then inquired why we are here in this life. He considered this for a moment before saying that we are here to learn about each other, which will in turn make us learn about ourselves. This was the solution to getting back to the source of our true being. We as individuals are like an apple that has been split into many sections, the only way we can ever become whole again is to learn about all the other pieces. He told me not to tell anybody about this at my current place of living as 20

they would not understand, but to tell people back home, as I will have an impact on some of them. He instructed me to write all this down and to paint what I have seen. After this, I was tempted to ask more about my own future, but from previous experiences I knew that I would be afraid to hear the answers. I decided to end the conversation because I also had to go to the bathroom and my right hand started to get tired. Once I told him this he asked to feel my face one more time and I agreed. With a final stroke of my face, from the top of my head to my chin, it was over. We separated as he had promised. I laid in bed for an extra minute looking at my hand not believing what had just transpired. This was my most incredible experience so far. I figured about twenty minutes had elapsed from the beginning of my session to the end. This was definitely a different type of experience. It had lasted twice as long and there was a two-way conversation with the spirit realm. Unlike previous visions where the spirit realm only communicated to me, I was able to communicate back. I wish that I had had a device to record what I had said, as it had been a long conversation and I was not able to remember it all. 13 th Time/Salvia 20x/“Soul Retrieval” This time I asked for my soul retrieval, an idea I got from watching a Coast to Coast video on YouTube. At the first hit I was transported to a grass field with three spirit people that had a red glow to them. I felt a force drawing me towards them; they were showing me something. I was then sucked down into the ground to a dark space where I saw columns of spirit people, starting at the top with a dark navy blue then gradually turning to red. The columns extended down going quite a distance until they were standing on a bright orb of light which had a reddish orange glow to it. There, the spirits were merging into the light. It was as though my soul was as complete as it could be until I can return to the universal consciousness. It seemed that the source was creating and projecting everything to be placed and played out for its own curious imagination. I understand that there are certain places on Earth which have spots like this, such as Stonehenge; a place where you can feel and tune into the universal consciousness. 14 th Time/Salvia 20x/“Puffs of Dimensions” I asked if I should call this old crush of mine. In this vision I saw what I thought to be her and her parents waiting for me to call. I got the feeling they weren’t happy and did not want me to call them. They were the color of red as well as their surroundings. This vision faded away in three puffs of red smoke, leaving me with an unwanted feeling of darkness. 15 th Time/Salvia 20x/“The Golden Party” I asked no questions this time. I was accompanied by Al, (one of my friends) as he watched me being consumed by the Salvia’s effects. The Salvia curled me up in my chair, and I began telling him, “You have to put your arms up,” as I saw a crowd of navy colored spirits waving their arms in a party-like fashion towards three brightly glowing liquid pools of gold. I could hear them cheering, along with a whooshing-sound-type of music. I had never heard such music before. 21

The only reason I could think of for this vision was that I was going to a party the next day. I felt as though the spirit realm really knows how to party. I wondered what those three golden pools were that they were facing... perhaps the pools were the source of the music. Friend’s 1 st Time/Salvia 30x/ / “Mysterious Lady” My friend Al tried Salvia. To my surprise, he did not shut his eyes, yet was still able to see the visions. The first thing he saw was the building directly in front of him vanishing, along with everything around it, except me. He saw a middle-aged white woman standing behind me in a flowered dress with short brown hair. After a few minutes I asked him if he was back, but he did not respond. Afterward he told me that he had heard what I had said and told me “Hell no, I’m going.” He told me that he was pulled to the horizon of what he thought was somewhere in the mid-west. He saw bushes divided by a path, and flew up and along the center of the trail. Once at the horizon he saw the sun setting in what looked like a desert landscape. As the vision started to fade, it did so by returning to reality bit by bit. We discussed the woman he saw, and thought perhaps that she was the ghost spirit haunting his house. I also noted that I had to close my eyes to see other realms which he did not. This illustrates the individual effects Salvia has on different people. 16 th Time/Salvia 10x/“Double Vision” I was showing another group of friends the effects of Salvia and how quick the whole process is. I asked them if they could play some meditation music with no vocals in order to mask the outside noises. Halfway through the song there was a woman’s voice, which had an influence on what I saw. I did not want to ask anything extremely deep, so I jokingly told them I’d be asking to go to Mars. As the room faded from my awareness, I was swept into space flying at an incredible speed until a typical Grey’s face began to materialize. Suddenly, when the woman’s voice came over the speakers, I saw a row of women appear on each side of the alien’s face, pulling it apart. The women looked like they were wearing a tight, shiny black uniform. Then the vision faded along with my laughter. Once again I was laughing because I was “Salvia happy”, not because I found anything funny. Chapter 4 The Extroverted Experiences For the most part, up until this point I had been asking questions that pertained solely to me. I had only looked at a small part of the grand scheme of things, without trying to figure out how I fit into all of this; I decided I wanted to know how far I can go beyond my limited awareness. Thanks to my good friend Al, I was able to redirect myself to a higher path of consciousness. 17 th and 18 th Time/Salvia 30x/“Confusion”--“Finding My Center” I went outside with Al to smoke Salvia. On the way he stopped me and asked if I 22

could hear “That.” I stopped to listen and heard birds chirping, but he said he could hear an energetic crackling of energy. As we were walking into a small clearing, he said it would be a good spot to smoke. I suggested he go first (since it was his idea,) but after some debate I ended up going first. As I got ready, he started tell me to feel the life around me; the mushrooms feeding off the life of the pine tree roots, and how everything is interconnected. As I took a hit of Salvia, I was pushed into a mixed flow of blackness and navy blue spirits. Halfway through this experience, Al was pacing behind me telling me “Look up, look at the sky.” I asked him if he was talking to me as I slipped in and out of the two worlds. As I was coming fully out of it, not moving or even looking at him he began to tell me about what had just transpired. I felt like I had just had massive amounts of expanding consciousness downloaded into me, yet nothing of any specifics. I told him what I had seen and that when I do Salvia I always see people. He told me they were my ancestors trying to help me connect with the spirit world. He told me he tried to get me to go beyond myself, to go beyond my immediate awareness. As he talked, I was shocked to realize that despite all the years I had known him, I’d never realized he was a “Zen Buddhist Master.” He told me he was trying to make me aware of that which is outside of myself, because I kept asking the introspective questions and none of the retrospective ones. There needed to be a balance of the two. He told me about the seven chakras, explained each one’s purpose, and their significance to me, how they are all connected to our Auras. He said I should try again, and this time focus on feeling the outer edges of my Aura and go beyond my immediate awareness. I asked him how he had learned these things and who had taught him. All he would say was he had been around. Getting ready now for round two, I took a deep breath and focused on the boundaries of my energy, while simultaneously trying to feel the flow of life around me. As the 30x Salvia rushed down my lungs I put the pipe down and held it in for as long as I could. This time things were more concise. In a fifteen foot circle around me, the same navy blue spirits reappeared. Now they ran from the edge of my aura towards me, targeting a small circle on my stomach. There they left a cool, prickling sensation of energy that felt wonderful. Opening my eyes, to find Al, I told him what had just transpired. He asked if I had felt his presence in my vision. I said I thought so, “Behind me.” He then told me he had been in the realm with me. I never asked exactly how he had done that, but eventually he indicated that through years of practicing meditation, he is now able to travel at will and perceive things without the Salvia. He said Salvia is a great tool but that it is unnecessary. He knelt in front of me and told me that although I am insignificant, I have all the power inside of me. There is an unlimited supply of it and I can take it anywhere I go. Once again I noticed I was more aware and felt more a part of everything around me. I asked if he had told our other friends about his “Zen Buddhism.” He said no. When I asked why, he said because they never asked the right questions. Then he reminded me of the previous night when I told some people about my near out-of-body experience and also of some other friends who said they had had one as well. The response was mostly disinterested disbelief. I guess there is no point in revealing anything so sacred, unless the person is searching for it. Otherwise, it would be like talking to a wall. He then told me that our paths had crossed for a reason. I felt as though he were some sort of 900 year-old Yoda teaching me the force. I felt privileged to be receiving such 23

knowledge. He spoke of infinity; once you think you’ve gone to the end of knowing everything, there is more. He made me realize there are uncounted numbers of infinities and how great this endless source of consciousness is. He said he doesn’t know everything and there is much more for even him to learn. I was amazed at the amount of knowledge he had to offer, and remained convinced he is a “Zen Buddhist Master.” At this point, Al tried the 30x, and afterward said it was a good feeling. He had been engulfed in a white light and a sense of calmness had fallen over him. He had gone beyond his consciousness to where he could perceive everything, yet nothing in particular. He enjoyed it nevertheless and maybe he reached were he had wanted to go. As we picked up and headed back to the house I finally got a source of some of his knowledge. He told me to look up Indian spiritual journeys and to look up some Buddhism teachings. The sensation of energy in my stomach stayed there for another two hours. When some friends came by he acted as though nothing happened, although minutes before he told me that as interesting and satisfying the experience may be in the other realms, he also appreciates this life. I understood what he meant, but didn’t have my own experiences to feel as he did about life. But in time, I know I will. 19 th Time/Salvia 30x/“Going Beyond” While preparing my pipe with Salvia, I started to go over in my mind how I wanted to go beyond myself. Taking a few deep breaths, I ignited the Salvia to red ambers. I inhaled as much of the smoke as I could, leaving it in my mouth for a few seconds before sucking it down to the core of my being. Once it hit the center of my chest, I set the pipe on the coffee table, sat up straight, and thought only of going beyond. As I blew out the smoke, it propelled me deep into the couch. My awareness shot me through a darkness filled with even darker spheres floating around in space. As I rushed past them, I pierced into one of them. Once inside, my attention was riveted to a sun suspended in the middle of the sphere, radiating light on the navy blue spirits walking on the inner wall. There were so many of them I could not see the inner surface of the sphere. As I watched them, I noticed that the spirits next to me began to realize my presence. I remember yelling out, “It’s right there, it’s right there!” in an ecstasy. I was in the presence of two friends, and was trying to tell them what I saw. But of course, there was no way for them to see what I was seeing. Yet almost as soon as I shot to this other world, I was quickly shot back into the living room and telling my account to my friends. They looked at me as if I had lost my mind, but were still interested in trying it again on their own. I told them solo is the best way to do it. One of them had already tried Salvia, but did not like the feeling of being sucked down into the floor. He decided to wait for another day. My other friend tried it, but was smoking it like a cigarette even after I explained how to do it. In the end, I think this person also wanted to do it alone. Having other people around while doing Salvia does make you a bit self-conscious of how you’re going to act. I told them that the last time I had done it, I was left with a circle of energy on my stomach and how great it felt. I was left with that same remarkable feeling this time too. I feel we are all just cells of yet a larger, more conscious being. There are multiple 24

realities filled with multiple entities in the void of space. I did go beyond myself, except I am still running into something familiar. Someday, I’d like to go beyond familiar. 20 th Time/Salvia 40x/“Infinity” I asked to look into infinity. As the vision appeared on the back side of my eye lids, I realized I was in space. I noticed from my left something coming towards me. I heard a sound between a great gust of wind and a train as a single row of different colored spirits, each with their arms pushing the one in front of them forward, zipped past me at an incredible speed. I looked to my right and watched the row of spirits continue on to infinity; there was no beginning or end. I was left in a state of awe. Infinity; we only know there are no limits, no tangible way to hold it, see it or comprehend it. All we can do is accept we are a part of it and be happy knowing there is no end to our playground of possibilities. People have always told me you can do whatever you want the choices are endless. They’re right, but I don’t think they truly know how infinity feels. They only know the Webster’s definition of it. Experiencing and seeing what it’s like will leave you in awe of its majesty. Once you have that feeling within you, you can harness that inspiration to unleash your greatest desires and allowing them to become your reality. The only limit to your reality, is your imagination. Bo’s 1 st Time With Salvia The first time my friend Bo did Salvia he had retreated from being consumed into the experience. The second time, he let go of this reality and was finally pulled into a world of geometric shapes and patterns. Afterward he said it was like being sucked into two side by side propellers. Once through, he was engulfed by warm, beautiful colors that looked like a Magic-eye picture. Overall, he was stunned at how powerful it was and truly enjoyed the experience. He was eager to tell his other friend about it and couldn’t wait to get his own Salvia. He wanted to try it alone in a darker setting, where he was hoping it would calm him down and make him more relaxed in general. A couple of months later some of my friends remarked that Bo seemed less stressed. Salvia can leave you in a calmer state, as it helps you comprehend what is truly important in life. In the end there is nothing worth losing your head over. 21 st Time/Salvia 40x/“Tree” Al told me that he would like to do Salvia again, so without hesitation I agreed and began to gather my things. On our way to our favorite spot, he told me the direction he wanted me to try with this next Salvia journey. He suggested I think about the wood I had been splitting earlier that day. He told me to think about how it lived, how it’s going to serve us, and to thank it for giving its life. I equated what he was telling me how an Indian gives thanks for taking a life to stay alive. Upon arriving at the spot, he placed the chair so it faced east, telling me how the Egyptians, Native Americans, Mayans and many other cultures believed each direction had its own personal energy. Thinking on this, I remembered I had been facing north during our last Salvia session. After this session, I would have done Salvia twice with Al 25

at this spot; once facing north and now once to the east. As I sat down, I took several deep breaths to calm myself and to focus on the trees around me, including where the tree I had split had been cut down. I was thinking about the tree, how I was sorry, yet appreciative for its life in helping to perpetuate my own. As I allowed the Salvia to engulf my mind, I saw three trees growing from small shrubs to big trees in moments. My perspective moved from looking at them from the side, to looking down on them. A smiling crowd of people was walking from the trees towards me. They were green like the tree, with a yellow light reflecting on them from the sky. The tree had had a good life and was content to be giving itself to me. 22 nd -23 rd -24 th Time/Salvia 40x/“DNA Within” I asked what makes me who I am. The first two times I entered the Salvia world all I saw were red spirits searching side by side in the darkness of my body. Feeling them move through me had felt like a warm line of energy moving as a slow, gentle wind. On my third voyage, they started to run a winding path around three black circles. With that pattern, they assumed the double helix of a DNA molecule that became a larger single spirit - me. 25 th Time with visuals and 26 th Time with Body Possession/Salvia 40x-30x/“Mr. and Ms. Salvia” Sitting in my chair in the woods on a warm sunny morning, I asked if Salvia could tell me about itself. As the 40x flowed into my lungs, my mind flowed to another dimension. I saw a flow of green spirits racing around a series of bright gold squares which appeared to be contained in a strangely shaped plant. This plant had a straight edge on the bottom and oval forms on top. Each oval section was the same and contained the green spirits and the golden squares. Each receding section got smaller and smaller, like dividing fractions. They continued away from me to a point where I could no longer see their end. As the green spirits moved away from me, I heard, telepathically, a woman’s voice saying that she was late for a party. As the babble of the spirits began to fade away, I felt myself slipping away as well. Opening my eyes, I instantly looked down, where I noticed for the first time that there were small mushrooms growing in front of me. I got on my hands and knees to examine them more closely. I sat back in the chair and prepared another dose of Salvia, only this time I used 30x a lower dosage from the previous 40x. Now I asked to see and feel the world’s energy. This time I kept opening and closing my eyes to see if I could see anything with my eyes open. After two hits of the 30x, I was surprised to find nothing had happened. I put down the pipe and had an urge to run, so I got up and started to walk. I started to talk to myself, soon realizing that, like one of my previous tours, I was not alone. I was talking to Mr. Salvia. He said, “You want to see the world? Let’s go. Let’s walk, until you get to the end of the world, and once you get there, keep going! You want to feel it? Here you go.” I knelt down and felt the grass, while he told me “Look, Ms. Salvia had to go to a party. Why can’t you just be like everybody else and just smoke this shit. You always have to ask these difficult questions. I don’t always have an answer for you.” I walked up to a mushroom, picked it up and looked at it. “There are other plants that can help you,” remarked Mr. Salvia. I then asked 26

if I will be rid of him when I needed to be, and he said, “Yeah, all you have to do is snap your fingers and I’ll be gone.” Through my body he snapped my fingers to demonstrate, and then said in a reassuring tone, “Now I’m not going to get you caught talking to yourself out here in the woods.” I asked him another difficult question. He left without me having to snap my fingers. Although I was left with a feeling of disappointment, I hope I’ll find my answer in another plant, just like he said. 27 th Time/Salvia 60x/“The Source of Consciousness” In the woods I sat in my chair facing south in front of a pine tree. I asked, before enveloping my mind with 60x, where consciousness comes from. Within a minute I felt a strong line forming around my head as if I had just put on a tight hat. Then, in the darkness of my mind, I saw a small and beautiful light to my left. It was mostly white but I could see there were colors on the edges of its boundaries. It formed long, spidery lines of light connecting to other lights like itself, including me. As the lights disappeared I opened my eyes, seeing that where the small, beautiful lights had appeared, now pine trees were standing. I felt as though not only consciousness comes from within me but also from everything else in this world. It’s all connected, we’re all connected. Consciousness comes from a beautiful light surrounded by unknown darkness.

28 th Time/Salvia 60x/“Access Denied From the Fourth Dimension” As soon as I finished my twenty-seventh Salvia trip I asked to go to the fourth dimension. I once again inhaled the 60x and slipped down into another realm. I was rushing past a line of red spirit people. There was another line of spirits beneath them as if it were a reflection of the ones on top. The line curved and bent like a never-ending “S” until it ended at a door. The background was a pinkish red and I had the physical sensation of falling through this realm. I felt perhaps the spirits were annoyed with me, as I was falling past them while they patiently waited. I got right up to the door when the Salvia began to wear off, pulling me back the way I had come as I was flying away, I said to myself, “I am not the only person trying to go to the 4th dimension.” As I came out of it, I found myself drooling and still felt like there was a residual force pushing me into the ground. For several minutes I felt paralyzed and noticed blue-colored fleas covering my feet. I got up, brushed them off, grabbed the chair, and headed back to the house. I felt like I was still tripping for another twenty minutes after the vision and decided that 60x didn’t do anything more than the lower doses except to give me longer after effects. Contemplating what had just occurred I felt that I was not ready to leave this dimension after all. I wondered if my spirit had left this dimension, would I have been able to come back? 29 th -30 th Time/Salvia 80x/“Trying to See My True Self”- “Still Trying to See My True Self” 27

I asked to see my true self. The first trip, all I saw was what appeared to be the same small, beautiful light from my twenty-seventh trip. It had lines of light connecting to other small lights except for one, this one went straight into the eyes of an Aztec Indian. He was kneeling down on one knee, with his right arm up and fingers nearly touching the string of light entering his eyes. All I could see of him was a white outline. As this vision faded I was not satisfied with it and did another round with the 80x. This time, I saw a bright blue figure carried by several red spirits. They all appeared to be inside the dark silhouette of my head, which was against an even darker background. I said in a telepathic voice “It’s about time,” watching as they carried my blue soul down through my own dark body. As they left my sight I could still feel them as a circle of energy moving through my body until they reached the upper part of my right leg before fading out. I felt that I was insignificantly small, and at the same time powerful and important. The vision revealed that I was being carried through life by protective spirits that were watching over me. As I contemplated the Aztec Indian vision, I thought maybe he was trying to show me that my true self is just pure consciousness. I still want to try to see my true self, as I feel I‘m still missing something. Perhaps if I say I want to be face-to-face with my true self, it will prove more revealing than these last two visions.

31 st Time/Salvia 10x/“Indians That Tried To Help Me in an OBE” When I told Al that I had purchased 60x and 80x of Salvia, and told him of my experiences with them, he became interested in trying a higher dose himself. He told me he would like to try to make contact with a ghost he believes dwells in his house. We found a spot not far from his home where we set up a chair in the woods for him to do the Salvia. I prepared the pipe with 60x then handed it to him, sitting on the cold fall grass just a few feet away. While Al took a few deep breaths before inhaling the smoke, I begin focusing my mind on trying to attract this ghost’s attention for Al. Several minutes later, he came back to reality to tell his story. He told me that he had felt almost bound to that spot, held back from his search. A few minutes later he told me that he could hear chattering, but nothing clearly. With his first failed attempt behind us, I suggested he try again, this time using 10x as I had not been too pleased with the effects of 60x either. After filling his pipe, I went back to my original spot and watched him while I concentrated once more for him to contact the ghost. As before, when he came back, he said he was again much attached to the spot and felt like he had been trying to leave it. He was drawn back, though this time he said he could see colorful woods with many paths. He said he had tried going down each one, but couldn’t. I said to him that I thought that he needed to do this near his house, because perhaps the ghost was quite possibly bound to that particular area. He agreed. I suggested to him that since he could not reach the ghost, that I, instead of also trying to contact the ghost, would try to have an out of body experience (OBE). This time I sat in the chair while Al sat on the ground, Indian style. Once the pipe was 28

filled I started to prepare my mind by repeating to myself to relax, just let go, and leave my body. After several deep breaths the flame hit the Salvia, and the smoke began to flow through me. I set the pipe aside while the back of my eyelids became a movie screen, and started to see the formation of the unknown. Unfocused beings begin to appear. The unknown became a crowd of Indians running down from the top of my being. They looked beautifully real and for some reason, familiar. My focus instantly moved to the one in front of the crowd. He wore brown leather pants and moccasins, no shirt and had red and blue painted stripes on his chest and arms. His long black hair was flaring behind him as he descended into my being, which appeared as a pure white light. I began to feel a separation from my body, and heard a woman’s voice scream out to the Indians, “You’re not going to help him leave his body,” in a rather authoritative and demanding way, at the same time sounding more like a question. There was no response from the crowd of Indians; I simply felt I knew what their feelings were about that question. “We’re here to help our friend.” They felt like old acquaintances, as if I shared a special bond of friendship with them. Once the visuals began to fade, I could still feel their presence, trying to push my spirit out of my body. It felt as though they had pushed the upper part of my spirit out, while the lower half remained stuck at my hips. I told Al what I had just seen, and despite the disappointment of an unsuccessful OBE, it nevertheless left me in wonder of what I had just experienced. I told him it was strange how my perspective allowed me to see the back part of myself and the Indians at the same time. He told me my third eye is not in one spot, looking in one direction, but that it encompasses all that is around me. I was not expecting to see myself in this way, as a pure light. He told me how he had been able to communicate with a girl by projecting his spirit to get close to her, and that he had been just a white sphere of light. Each time I talked with him, he kept unraveling a deeper mystery about himself. Later that night while talking to Al, he told me how he has done Cannabis on many occasions and that one’s experience is a reflection of intentions. Your beliefs and expectations will also be a fuel for the kind of experience you will have. I finally realized why I most likely had the type of experience I had when I did Cannabis. The main stream media keeps insisting if you smoke Marijuana you are going to be an “air head”, oblivious to what is going on around oneself. But if you use it to get certain insights or to see something from a different perspective then you are most likely going to find success in your search. I remember this was one of the reasons why one of my friends used it. It helped him be more creative with his music. My intention with Salvia use is to get a better understanding of my life, myself, and what’s beyond this life. So far I’ve been accomplishing just that. When I’ve seen other people use the same plant with different intentions from my own, I noticed they still get what they are looking for. Whether it be alcohol, entheogens, or whatever mood or mind altering substance or techniques one uses, the result will be whatever the person intends to create with the experience. Salvia has a great potential for breaking down our small, limited way of thinking, taking our minds to unlimited possibilities. 32 nd Time/Salvia 10x/“Shattered Image” I went out drinking with some friends one night, because it was my last night to hang 29

out with them before leaving town. It was one of those rare nights when I gave myself no limit on how much I was going to drink. I think it was because I wished there were some job, girl, or life I could have here in my old home town. It was apparent this was not where I belonged. Sometimes, I wonder if there is such a place. I was once called a gypsy by an old work acquaintance when he’d discovered I had moved six times in four years. After having dozens of shots and a few beers, I was on my way to a state of total drunken annihilation. Once home I got the bright idea to try Salvia. Now I knew this was going to be a bad experience, but also knew I was going to write a book about Salvia and had to include this very important subject in it, that this plant is not a party drug and should not be mixed with alcohol. The fact is that I, as well as the Aztec Indian Shamans, consider this plant to be a spiritual sacrament that can propel a person’s spiritual development and should only be used as such. So there I was, sitting in my bed, already off my drunken rocker inhaling Salvia. Instantly I went from riding a kid’s roller coaster to an interstellar Star gate roller coaster from hell that lasted for hours. I was completely incapacitated to the point where I couldn’t even roll over if I wanted to puke. The only thing I saw was what looked like a shattered image swirling around in darkness. My final and most obvious conclusion was that Salvia should not be mixed with alcohol. Like Ayahuasca, I think it’s important to have a good diet in order to have the most beneficial results. So to save yourself from a horrible experience with Salvia, don’t mix liquor with it. 33 rd Time/Salvia 10x-40x/ “Nothing Happened”-“Las Vegas Friends First Time” This was a very unusual experience. I was unable to visit the Salvia realm after inhaling both 10x and 40x. I was trying to show my old friend Peter the physical effects one may have while using Salvia: increased sweating, loss of, and sometimes uncontrollable laughter, but ultimately you have nothing to fear. I dislike the media’s perspective of Salvia. When they look at people laughing when using Salvia, they assume the users have lost their mind, when in reality they have just discovered an over-whelming sense of joy within themselves. As I sat on my bed smoking Salvia, I found I could not concentrate. Peter was impatient and too fidgety for me to relax and allow myself to slip away. After several attempts to journey I gave up, perplexed by how the Salvia would not work if the setting was not right. As a result, when I had Peter try, I gave him 40x, thinking he would need a big dose to have an effect, since I had been unable to travel myself. This was illogical thinking on my part but for some reason I felt the Salvia had lost its potency. I was wrong and wished I had started him on 5x. Within seconds Peter began the typical Salvia laughter and began rolling around on my bed. I sat in a chair next to him, and did everything I could to keep my own laughter quiet and be respectful of his experience. After three to four minutes of this he came out of it and told me that he felt like he was being rolled up. He even said he could hear a tape noise as if pulling tape from a roll. He told me it was as if the tape peeled the light right out of him. 30

About ten minutes later he started to feel nauseous and began to vomit a little. He began to say things like, “It’s like space weed. Aliens brought this shit,” and “It’s also like wheat grass,” “Remind me not to do this shit again,” and “I’m not your monkey, I’m not your experiment,” “How can you go through that, so much laughter, then so much pain?” I told him the other six people I had given it to did not have any bad side effects. He was the only one. I told him my interpretation of his experience, that Salvia purged all of the toxins out of his body. He smoked a pack of cigarettes a day, along with eating lots of junk food. Those factors show the importance of having a healthy life style before doing Salvia. I myself sweated quite a bit my first ten times, but now I barely sweat at all while doing Salvia. Peter felt ill for a few more hours before feeling better. After this experience I realized that I can’t push entheogens on people. They must desire to try them on their own. Now I know why Al had never told anyone about the things he knows. You must have a strong desire to find what you are searching for, otherwise you are wasting your time. There was a time for me when I was searching for a deeper meaning to this life, but I did not know the right questions to ask. Soon I would stop asking questions and start demanding to go to a higher level of awareness using another type of entheogen that would take me to the place I was searching for - complete connection with the source of everything, which became an indescribable feeling of joy. 34 th Time/Salvia 10x-40x/“It’s Ok” I asked the spirits of the next dimension if it was all right that I got Peter sick. First, I saw an energy grid of squares materialize out of the nothingness. They were gray with a smaller purple square in the middle. Then a face resembling what looked to be a Grey was pushing through the grid with several human spirits walking around on its face. All the spirits were navy blue, while the eyes of the alien were a light blue. Eventually a turquoise female spirit came down from the alien’s face. She told me, “It’s Ok,” they did not mind that I got Peter sick. Yet I knew from that moment on I could not push Salvia on people. I’ve had such incredible experiences with the plant that I wanted everybody to see what I saw. I realized not everybody is ready for such a leap. I can only share my experiences with them and hope that they begin their own search. It’s all I can do. 35 th Time/Salvia Purple Sticky 10x two times - one hit of 20x of Dragon Salvia/ “Face to Face and Beyond” I asked to see myself face to face, and wondered where all the spirits from the Salvia world were. It seemed to take much more smoke to get an effect this time. Either that, or it was becoming inactive in me. Eventually, I reconnected to the spirit realm and found myself looking at my spirit-self face to face. I was close enough that my physical body was partially inside my spirit-self, like being dipped into a mirror. Now all I could see was the outline of my spirit face, in which a bright orb was shining. My spirit-self was mostly blue with a tinge of pink in it, and as I looked around I saw spirits of all colors walking around. There was one that seemed to notice my situation and was shocked to see what it was witnessing. The spirit’s hands were on its cheeks with its mouth open. I couldn’t see the rest of my body, but I could 31

feel the lines where my physical body touched the spirit body. One of the interesting things about Salvia is the way it causes you to feel a tingling sensation that corresponds to what you are seeing. Once I left the spirit world I felt for the first time, that I saw who I truly was. It was as if I were seeing myself in the mirror for the first time. At the same time it was just a wonderful feeling knowing more about the true nature of who I am. An energetic being of consciousness. 36 th Time/Salvia 30x/ “Too Late to Say Good Bye” My first, and so far only pet was a dachshund named Amber. She was a good dog and I always wanted to be there for her, especially when she died. It boggles my mind that out of all the time I was away in the military or living away from home, she didn’t die until I was back. During the last three days of her life, I knew she was nearing the end. She did not eat or drink anything, only purged her system. I did everything I could to help her and on the last night she barked for me every time I tried to sleep in my room away from her. My mother tried to get me to leave her but I stayed, lying down next to her. Laying there in her last hours we just looked into each other’s eyes until at last she gave a final groan sound and arched over with the drool of death coming from her mouth. To say the least, I was heartbroken, and for the first time in my life I truly cried. Amber had been my best friend since I was ten years old. Now, three years after her death I was getting ready to smoke Salvia and perhaps see if I could say goodbye one more time. At first I saw a woman with shoulder-length hair that seemed as though it would have been blond if it were not for her overall purple spirit superimposing over her. There were other spirits in a line behind her as she was looking down, as if she were paying her respects to Amber, who no longer appeared to be in the spirit realm. Above this woman were spirits walking into a light. I saw the top of them as if I were above them. Like the woman spirit they were purple, and the lines formed what looked like a Swastika symbol. After looking into this symbol I discovered that it was originally called the Svastika and that it was used in Buddhism as a “Heart’s Seal, laid on the breasts of departed Initiates after their death”.2 This vision indicated to me that Amber had been in the spirit realm but had moved on to a higher realm of consciousness. I felt I was too late in contacting her and when I die, she won’t be there waiting for me. I felt sad, but knew she had been an advanced spirit, and was ready to move to the beyond. I am grateful I was there when she died, to comfort her as she passed on. When we move to the spirit world, there is still the individual self. Once we progress to our full potential, our true selves, we meld into a single all-encompassing being. We all simply become one, with no memory or sense of self. We melt together as a single entity. 37 th Time/Regular Salvia four times-one hit of 10x/ “When You Die” I had a burning curiosity to know what it would be like to experience death. In the vision, I saw what looked like a flower petal surrounded by darkness. In the center of this petal

2 http://www.theosophy-nw.org/theosnw/ctg/swas.htm

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was a white light that grew bigger as it rushed toward me with a loud rumbling sound, like that of a jet engine. As the petal of light came between my eyes, I could see it was a white stream of energy surrounded by human spirits coming headfirst at me. When they came to where I was, I was pulled up into the flow. Arms at my side, I was unable to affect the speed and force with which I was moving. I watched my fellow spirits on this wild energy ride, flowing around the stream of light. They were bright blue in the center of their being, with a red glow on their outer edges. I felt as though I were screaming, as if I were on the most stupendous roller coaster in the world and enjoying every minute of it. After a bit, it slowed down until the energy beam dissipated into nothing, leaving its spiritual passengers to wander the black landscape of the back side of my eyelids. Now the spirits had changed to a solid red. Afterwards I was so impressed at the speed with which I had left my body, I had to tell my roommate of my astonishing experience. While talking to Peter I realized that when you die, there are of course others who have passed on at the same time, and it’s as though there is a bolt-of-energy bus, if you will, that transports you to the next realm. All I can say about this experience is that death is one hell of a ride. 38 th Time/Plain Salvia (un-enhanced-regular leaf chopped up) four hits-then one hit of 10x Purple Sticky (not my personal favorite brand)/ “Contacting a Friends Deceased Father” There is definitely a synchronicity to this life, because now I was curious as to where one goes after death. My friend Joan had scheduled a meeting to have a Tarot reader ask the same thing. She wanted to know if her father, who had passed away a few weeks earlier, was somewhere she could speak with him. Since I believed I had already contacted spirits with my Salvia sessions, I told her I too, would attempt to reach her father. As I prepared myself for the journey, I asked where her father was and expressed a desire to speak with him. Holding in the Salvia smoke, my vision opened into the spirit realm. I saw several red spirits standing about in a black space. I had one of them on either side, looking down at me as if I were lying on the ground. Then, I saw a bluish green spirit come up in front of me until it merged with my spirit essence. All I could see was the outline of the spirit as the conversation began: “Hey, you made it through. You’re naked!” said Joan’s father in a surprised and upbeat sort of way, “I didn’t expect to see you. You’d better be careful. There are bad spirits out here. Good ones too, but you ought to know what you are doing. I really didn’t expect to see you.” “Is there anything I can tell your daughter and your wife?” I asked in a sincere tone. “Yeah, tell them I love them, I’m right here next to them, and someday we’ll be together again. I wish I could tell them this myself, but they’ll learn about it eventually.” I asked how I could prove to them I had spoken to him. He said “You can’t, not until they die.” I remember thinking to myself, “Perhaps they could try Salvia,” although I wasn’t sure if everyone can get the same results. He laughed again, “Boy, I didn’t expect this. I didn’t think you’d come here, in the spirit world, in the afterlife.” I asked how I could stop this conversation, and he said “Anytime you want to let go.” I’m always slightly anxious to know how I can stop a conversation with one of these spirits once they start. During all this, I was getting a bit self-conscious of the fact that I was talking out loud and wondered if my 33

roommates could hear me and think I had gone crazy. He reminded me again to be careful of what I was doing and that he, along with all the other spirits, are always with us. I got the feeling he was very happy and surprised to be where he was. When I was finally ready to end our discourse, he seemed to know that I was done. Perhaps my aura, which all spirits can see, told him how I felt. I opened my eyes and got up to tell Joan of what had just transpired. I realized how good I felt. I felt calm, happy and sure of myself. I felt enlightened to a point where I felt I had a better understanding of so much. All I could feel was love and peace. A couple of times before, Salvia had left a feeling of energy inside of me. However this time the sensation was located in my chest, slightly higher than before. It felt like a cool sun of energy was radiating from inside of me. Once I got my bathrobe on, I could not keep my hand away from my chest. It just felt so good. This strong feeling stayed with me for a couple of hours, eventually fading away by the end of the day. I went into Joan’s room to tell her what had just happened. Her mother was in the room when I entered, but not Joan. Once she came out I told them what had happened. I told her there are millions of spirits shoulder to shoulder that surround us in a black space. She said, “Maybe we don’t see as they do. To them, maybe it’s not black.” I agreed that was a good possibility. I did know, from what her father told me, that he was happy and excited to be in the spirit realm. At the same time there was still an element of evil there. Joan told me that the way I was telling her how her father had spoken was accurate to the way he sounded when he was alive. She wondered what her father wanted to tell her before he died. I told her that I thought it was about the afterlife, but how could he have known about it when he was still alive? She reminded me that he was seeing his deceased pet and old deceased friends who made visits to him before he had died. I asked her how the Tarot card visit had gone the previous night. She told me the reader said there are spirits all around us and that her father was with her, and that time does not exist there. This was the same feeling I’d developed through the use of Salvia. I told her of the feeling of energy and love I had in my chest. She said he had been a very loving man and perhaps he had left me with some of his own feelings. I agreed. I began to wonder if all the deceased feel this way in the spirit realm. It may be the spirits of the dead reflect the life and attitudes of the life lived before death. As Joan’s deceased father said, there are bad spirits to watch out for. I’m sure the evil ones don’t give the same feelings of love as the ones he left me with that day. 39 th Time/Salvia 10x/ “Spirits Centering My Energy” I asked to have my energy centered. I saw tiny red spirits surround a dark silhouette of myself. I could feel lines of spirits pushing in from the side of my body until the energy converged in my chest. I was left feeling refreshed and at peace with myself. 40 th Time/Salvia 20x/ “Take Me Out of Here” I asked to be taken out of this reality. I had an urge to escape this world for a while. I was putting in a lot of overtime at work and was feeling stressed. Once my vision opened into the spirit world, I saw spirits walking shoulder to shoulder toward an unseen sun. Their upper bodies were yellow with the reflection of its light, and 34

below they were red. I heard them saying, “Come on! Let’s go outside.” I thought I heard my Dad saying this outside of the Salvia world. But once the experience was over, I went to his room where I found him still asleep. When he finally woke up, he said he wanted to go outside, just like the spirits had said. It’s as though they knew what he had wanted to do that day. I, too, felt this is what I needed to do to get rid of some stress. Surprisingly, it actually worked. I didn’t need to escape this world, just my own head. Learning to appreciate this world is important to stay grounded. 41 st Time/Salvia 20x/ “I Know; We Got Our Hands on You”. I had felt that the Salvia spirit has done everything it could for me up to this point and wanted to personally thank it. The smoke directed my perception into the back sides of my eyelids and showed me my own blue spirit standing in the darkness. I was soon accompanied by several smaller yellow spirits that took hold of my arms and legs, helping me to move. I heard one of the female spirits say, “I know. We got our hands on you.” After hearing this, I instantly felt comforted and knew that they were helping me write this book. I began to wonder how much control the spirit realm really has on the physical realm. It may be more than I believe/perceive.

Chapter 5 Incocybe Mushroom (Shrooms)-The 2 nd Entheogen My friend Al, who had first guided me beyond myself, told me that you see what you expect to experience when you do any type of psychedelic. This is particularity true when using shrooms. I spent several days preparing for my first shroom session, deciding on a good time for the journey, and on what I wanted to learn from the experience. I was willing to let go, and simply surrender to the experience, wherever it led me. Ultimately, my goal was to see what it would be like to be a part of the universal consciousness. The first time, I planned to break its surface and peer from its fringes before going in completely. I learned a lot from this first experience with shrooms. It became my true schooling in spiritual consciousness. 1 st Shroom Trip (Inocybe Mushroom)/ four small stems and two caps/ “Lifetime of education in 4 to 6 Hours” Coming home from work during the dark hours of night I began to prepare for my first journey with Inocybe Mushrooms. My friend Peter knew I was planning on doing them soon and wanted to trip with me. I knew that he would be a distraction for me, as he had been when I tried to show him how to do Salvia Divinorum. Also, his intentions were not the same as mine, and that would affect my own experience. This event would take me past my limited awareness and blast me to the fringes of the universal consciousness. I convinced him that I was not going to do the shrooms, leaving me free to start the session alone in my room. I 35

changed out of my work clothes into my pajamas, and picked out two small, complete caps with an additional two stems to be the dose I would use for my first time. I chewed on each one separately until there was nothing left but the taste going down my throat. I don’t know what all the fuss is about the taste of shrooms; I had no problem eating them. I put on a CD called Detaching from the World which is an ambient music CD to meditate to. I turned off my lights and laid down on my bed with my head propped up by two pillows, and began to think of what I wanted to experience. After about forty-five minutes of lying there, I dozed off a bit before the effects of the shrooms began to kick in, waking me up to start the teaching. The clock on my dresser added a glow to my vision. I could make out the shapes in my dark room but now it was beginning to pulsate and seemed as if it were about to shatter away into nothing. I turned on my light to see what else I could see but for the most part everything seemed to go back to normal once the lights were on. The lights were hurting my eyes, so I turned them off. A feeling of warmth moved from my feet up to my head. Once this warmth had encompassed my whole being, I started to have a mental conversation with myself. What felt like many little lessons came at me with increasing speed and velocity. It felt like I started with kindergarten and went all the way to senior year of college in the space of an hour. I knew then that this was going to be a key part of my spiritual development. As the pace increased along the way I was able to grasp faint inklings of the lessons being taught to me, which consisted of creatures and geometric shapes that were devoid of any texture or detail, just a blue/purple grid framework that made up the images. My body started to warm up, I felt slightly nauseated. This lasted for about twenty minutes before wearing off. I started to laugh once the nauseated feeling went away and began to feel a round, swirling disk of energy in my lower back. The first urge that came over me was to shield myself from harmful spirits. I did this by pulling my bed sheets over me while at the same time imagining an actual shield around my body. I was instantly confronted with a phantom-like purple image of a dragon that was trying to attack me. Instead of trying to fight it, I felt the only way I could defeat this inner demon of mine was not to fear it, but rather give it a hug. As soon as this thought came to my mind, the dragon vanished. I came to the realization that I have nothing to fear but myself, for I create my own demons. I am projecting myself and everything around me. I have no limits in the infinite. Next I began to see a pinkish ball of consciousness emanating light (which could be different frequencies) condensing outward to the point where it creates our perceivable reality. As I watched this beautiful image I felt that there is no such thing as time or space. They are concepts of illusions that make up our reality. I felt so distant from my true self that I saw it was going to take some time before I could understand who I really am. As I was peeling away the onion rings of my mind, I felt as though I were beginning to understand how our reality coincides with and relates to the unseen realms; that I project myself, including the reality I perceive. At two different times I could just see what looked like a Grey, as the whole image was very dark and the aliens were coming and going from my field of view. When they were present I felt as though they were tuning my frequencies so I could better perceive other 36

domains. My ears were ringing, the pitch going up and down like the tuning of a radio station. Frequencies are at the core of perception. If we could tune ourselves in with different frequencies we would be able to perceive different realities. Towards the end of this session I was able to reflect on what had happened to me. I felt as if I were Humpty Dumpty, that I had shattered my ego to find out who I truly am. By morning I had put my ego back together again, but in a better form. I sensed that the reason we create this reality is because our true self (universal consciousness) is looking for something in the beyond. Once it looks within, it finds everything it desires. I felt the only place one can find true peace is within oneself. I also thought there was no point in telling anyone this because they too were a projection of my mind. Still I had an unshakable urge to release this information. I felt there was nothing more important than what I was learning with these substances. I knew that not everyone would be ready to hear what I have to say or see what I’ve seen. That’s fine, for those who are ready, will seek this information when the time is right for them. It’s probably a good thing that the majority of people believe in this physical reality, otherwise I imagine that it would disappear. If everyone used psychedelics, or learned to correctly meditate, and then realize everything is an illusion, we might temporarily vanish from this illusion. Psychedelics are similar to an illegal computer program that will grant you access to anything, giving you the power to see beyond the five senses. I’ll admit that I admire the power this reality has to offer and I respect its complexities even more than I had before starting my spiritual entheogenic quest. I now look forward to participating in this grand hologram. Shrooms in many ways are more intense than Salvia. Shrooms were able to rework my ego, whereas Salvia just gave me small fragments of insights at a time. Although Salvia is still a very important tool for self-discovery, shrooms, were a test, to be taken after spending a good portion of this life progressing spiritually. Although I know of people who have taken shrooms just for a kick, shrooms can be used for a higher purpose, such as exploring one’s own truth. There is a great deal of information available showing that shrooms have been used for religious and spiritual practices. Unfortunately, that knowledge has been reduced to a state of a taboo, in mainstream society. 2 nd Shroom Trip (Inocybe Mushroom)/Four real big stems, one small stem, one monster size cap, and one medium size cap/ “Connected to the Universal Consciousness” The next journey I had with Inocybe mushroom was a true blast off from physical reality. So get ready to take a trip into the neutral zone with me and be prepared to have your beliefs shaken to a point that makes you wonder and question what reality really is. As before, I ate the shrooms when I got home from work. I sat in my bed with all the lights off and thought how I wanted to be inside the Universal Consciousness. After about forty minutes I started an internal dialog with myself. I could feel my body getting warmer, as chakra energy began pulsating in my lower back. Soon the pulsating moved up my body and I felt the moment was nearly at hand. All I had to do now was let go of all my fears and dive 37

into the unknown. I started to see alien faces that looked like the Greys I had seen before, but it was dark and I could only make out the shape of their heads and their eyes. My hand began obsessively feeling the back of my neck. My perception went behind me and I could see a glowing red power cord slithering towards me like a serpent. I felt like I was being prepared to go someplace. I sensed the intentions of the aliens asking if I were ready to go into the universal consciousness. After a moment of hesitation, I let go of all my fear and agreed to be connected. I was instantly connected to the cord which transported my mind to the all-encompassing universal mind. I was rocketed away at an incredible speed in an eternal loop of pure consciousness. There was no longer a sense of identity, memories, time, or space. All that existed was pure joy and love. The intensity was like I was being shot across the galaxy at lightning speeds. The universal consciousness, appearing to turn inside out, revealed a blue spirit having a ball of white light emanating from its stomach, from there two arcs of white and blue energy made the shape of the infinity symbol over him. When Peter knocked on the door I had come back into this reality and found myself on the edge of my bed screaming, legs up and hands clenched like I was on the most intense roller coaster ride ever. Once he turned on the lights in my room, it felt like I was sucked out of the endless time loop and dropped into this time, this life of which I had no memory. He told me I was being too loud and an hour of this was enough. To me it seemed I had been in this state for only a minute. I felt like I dropped into someone else’s life. There was still a residual force pulling me into the universal consciousness. My vision was vibrating, stretching, and bending the grid work of this domain. As I lay on my bed, I was drooling and biting my bed sheets like an animal. The sheets had been torn off the mattress and lay tangled in knots. I was trying to pull memories of who I was and anything that could help me anchor myself. I had to force myself to try and stay in this reality, and figure out who I was and recapture all my memories. This would take hours. After an hour or two, I went to the bathroom to urinate but my penis was numb and I was only able to let out a few drops at a time. It felt like I had been given anesthesia. So I sat on the toilet seat until my legs went numb, eventually getting off and lying next to the toilet until I was able to pee again. Lying there on the floor, I felt that I was already dead and in purgatory, no longer a part of this life. Everything I was witnessing was outside of me. After another hour or so I was able to relieve myself, and thought how similar this experience was to the Humpty Dumpy story. I felt that I had shattered my ego and was putting myself back together again, but in a different and better form. I stayed in the bathroom for some time entertaining myself by making weird faces in the mirror. I went back into my room and laid down on my cluttered floor, looking at myself in the mirror that was leaning against the wall. Peering into my dilated eyes, I felt the presence of the aliens again telling me that they were tuning my frequencies and my ears began to ring with a fluctuating pitch. For what purpose or to what benefit, I don’t really know. I assume it was to change my perception of life in general. As the sun came up I told my friends that what I had experienced was amazing and provided them with highlights. They, on the other hand, told me that I was crazy last night, drooling all over myself, and screaming for over an hour. I realized that time does not exist in 38

the universal consciousness. I quickly took some notes of the previous events before going to bed. I had been awake for about twenty eight hours and was in dire need of some sleep. Waking up after a few hours and rethinking the experience I concluded that I had traveled through time into a universe of love, and was very much a part of it. Our illusion filled world does everything it can to convince us it is real through pain, hardships and distractions. But if we blast through the illusions with a quiet mind and love in our hearts, nothing will ever get in our way. Knowing this gave me a stronger urge to enjoy this reality, while appreciating it even more for its power and intricacies. The underlying reason I started this whole journey was because I was not content or at peace with myself. Now I feel as though I am. My inner demon of fear has been released, and my frequencies are vibrating at a higher level. We are part of an boundless consciousness in a limitless space. So get rid of all distractions, crawl inside your imagination and create whatever you want through love. Love is the fuel for the Universal Consciousness, the engine that creates everything. Chapter 6 Dimethyltryptamine (DMT) - The 3 rd Entheogen DMT is a natural psychedelic chemical that is produced by our pineal gland, which resides in the center of our brain. It is also found in nearly all animals and plants. The author of DMT The Spirit Molecule, Dr. Rick Strassman, believes that the pineal gland produces large amounts of DMT when we are born and just before we die. It is also believed that dreams are a result of this chemical. Despite the fact that DMT occurs naturally, it is a schedule-one drug in America. Why? I would like to hear the governments explanation on why it’s a scheduled 1 drug. Like Salvia and shrooms, this chemical has done wondrous things for me. In Appendix A, there are other references that will help you connect the dots to imagine why psychedelics in general are illegal. But in my eyes they are among the greatest tools for freeing our minds. 1 st Time/DMT/ “Welcome to the Light Realm” From reading the reports of other people’s experiences in Dr. Rick Strassman’s book, I prepared myself for an intense DMT trip. I watched with anticipation as my friend Devin prepared what looked to be a ridiculously small portion of a yellowish-white, grainy substance onto a soda can that had been converted into a pipe. Sitting outside on his back porch, I put the flame to the chemical, inhaling as much of the cotton ball tasting smoke as I could. It melted down inside the can with only a faint taste sticking to my tongue. The typical taste people claim to get when smoking DMT was not bad to me. This time I suggested that we use the pipe I had used for Salvia. He told me that DMT sticks to everything and once I used it in my pipe, it will never come off. Once again he put the same size portion on my pipe, but this time I was gently transferred into another dimension. First I started to hear a ringing in my ears, increasing in pitch until I was able to see bright colors of red, orange, and yellow flowing towards me in the shape of multiple squares. 39

This all happened within thirty seconds of taking the hit. As these bright colors vibrated towards me I started to make out a person sitting Indian style with her hands in a prayer pose. Flanking both sides of this person were two red snakes weaving about while hissing at me. An overwhelming feeling of euphoria came over me as I moved my head from side to side, with an intense smile on my face. From time to time I opened my eyes to see if I could see anything that way. The only difference I could see was that everything looked bluer and had a slight vibration to it. I have talked to people who can see things with their eyes open while doing psychedelics, but for others like me, we need to have our eyes shut. I closed my eyes again, seeing the same thing as before, except now there were two rows, one on top and one on the bottom of my field of vision. These yellow and white hued rows were cylindrical in shape, and housed a series of crossed cigar shapes. Then out of nowhere, a green translucent cylinder moved from the left of my vision to the right. It was like two tubes, one inside the other, rotating in opposite directions. I felt that I could have gone through it from the back side had I wanted to. Soon after the passing of the green translucent cylinder, the bright colors began to fade away into the blackness of my closed eyelids. I opened my eyes and looked at Devin and smiled at him, letting him know that I had really enjoyed that experience. After telling Devin what I had seen and about the green cylinder, he told me that he believes there are portals we can navigate if we so choose. I don’t know if there is a difference between taking DMT intravenously or smoking it, but my experience was totally different from Dr. Strassman’s patients. The majority of them frequently saw aliens, or something else that terrified them. However, I felt welcomed to this realm. Perhaps this difference is due to the fact that Dr. Strassman administered the doses intravenously while I smoked it. The whole experience lasted maybe ten to fifteen minutes, and once the visuals were done, I was able regain myself completely, with no residual feelings. Unlike Joe Rogan’s documentation of his trip of DMT (on YouTube.com called Joe Rogan talks DMT) and his forgetting a lot of his experience like a dream, I was able to remember everything from the experience. Also, unlike Joe Rogan, nothing about this experience was crazy to me. If anything, it felt like I had returned to a forgotten paradise where I felt a strong sense of belonging. At this particular time in my psychedelic experience, I felt as though shrooms had taught me the most. Salvia followed as a close second, then DMT with the least results. Yet once I finished that particular journey, I realized that they all had played a crucial role in my understanding of the different levels of consciousness. They each gave me a different perspective of how life works, where I fit into everything and how everything fits into me. 2 nd Time/DMT/ “Realities Collide” Around midnight on a warm summer’s night, I set up for a session with DMT, as my friend Natalie and I tried our best to ignore the relentless mosquitos. I placed a chair on the ground and sat down to prepare the pipe. Meanwhile, I talked to Natalie about life as she was admiring the stars. I took several deep breaths, clearing my mind of life’s matters and burned the DMT, absorbing its soft fumes. I placed the pipe down and leaned further back into the chair. My ears began to ring, tuning my frequencies to perceive the realm I was about to enter. What I first saw was what looked to be lips that were divided into four equal sections, folding 40

in on themselves with different shades of purples and pinks, in the shape of small squares. Then, centered on the top of these lips was a naked upside down, purple woman, being sucked into the center. At the same time, on the bottom half was a green snake, also being drawn in. When both the snake and the woman had vanished into the middle, the rest of the lips were absorbed into void of darkness. Next came a faint vision of a person sitting at a table, looking out a window. The entire scene had a yellow glow to it, with no other colors present. The other side of the table was not visible, but another figure who was also glowing yellow was walking back and forth in front of me. I was seeing Natalie walking in front of me with my eyes closed. Soon, the yellow figure passed from my perception and I opened my eyes. Once again, I was left with a euphoric feeling, and realized that perhaps lighting also affects the visions, much like when taking Salvia. I told Natalie what I had seen, and after a brief conversation I decided to do it one more time. rd

3 Time/DMT/ “Spirit Machine” After finishing the last session and giving a brief synopsis to Natalie of what I had just experienced, I prepared myself to reenter that particular realm one more time. The black voids of my closed eyelids were soon filled with a face that looked like a voodoo mask with yellow eyes. On its forehead was a red diamond-shaped tattoo. Its mouth looked like a jagged cut out Halloween pumpkin, along with its chin and top of its head. The face was looking and rising upward as it let out a cynical looking laugh. Beneath it came what appeared to be a UFO. It was colored with purple and pink squares like the lips in the last session, except there was some reds in this one. On the top and bottom of this UFO-shaped object were yellow rings and between these were several counter-rotating discs. This object rose up along the face with a bright white light emanating from behind it. Soon, my attention was drawn to figures of what looked like the outlines of people. These outlines were a mix of blues and purples, and approached me from both sides of the UFO object. The one closest to me looked like a female that was about to give me a hug, but then my frequencies returned back to this level of perception and the vision faded. I recalled telling Natalie during the experience what I was seeing, and I interpreted the whole thing as a spiritual machine. There are spirits that are creating everything we perceive. She seemed doubtful of such possibilities, but nevertheless was kind enough to let me contemplate this new theory of mine. As we were leaving the woods, occasionally looking up at the stars, I felt even more connected to the other realms just outside of everyday perception, and felt one with the universe. 4 th Time/DMT/ Same day-1 st Time/“Molecular Love” This was the first time I was able to try DMT alone, which is the way I prefer it. There are no distractions from other people and nothing to feel self-conscious about. Plus, I am able to go at my own pace, choosing how many times and how quickly I use DMT, without anyone wanting to have a turn. I was able to get six sessions in, one right after the other, which I believed was necessary to see how far I could go in the DMT world. I prepared my pipe and proceeded with my usual method of smoking psychedelics by 41

lying on my bed with the lights out, curtains drawn. Once again, like my first Salvia trip, I was curious about where to find love. I suppose the reason I keep asking this question is because I feel unable to find a soul mate. Although I did not know this at the time of this particular session, I would finally read The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire, by Deepak Chopra. I realized the reason I can’t find the one I’m looking for is because I am not vibrating correctly. There is always an infinite amount of possibilities out there, and the only way I can find what I’m looking for is to first change myself from within. At that point, I will project what it is that I’m looking for. My only question to Mr. Chopra is, how do I vibrate correctly in correspondence to what I’m looking for? But I’m already sure he would tell me to meditate, which I did. At that moment I was seconds away from blasting off alone in my room to try and find the answer through DMT. Blowing out the DMT smoke, I set my pipe on the dresser in front of me, laid down on my bed, and pulled the sheets over my head. I saw what looked like a purple molecule flowing in a tunnel along with other molecules right behind it. The tunnel seemed comprised of grid squares, while the molecules had tentacles waving about as they moved. I then realized that love is everywhere, right down to the molecular level. Love is what everything is made of. It was a simple, yet profound answer to my question. 5 th Time/DMT/ Same day-2 nd Time/ “Spirits Within” Right after I did the last session with DMT, I re-packed my pipe for another trip. I had an overwhelming feeling there were other spirits that were aware of what I was doing, and I wanted to meet them. So I demanded to be taken to them. Under the covers, my perception went inside my head, down into my throat, and into my chest, where I was taken to their mother ship which was actually located inside me. As in the last session, I saw the same purple molecules floating around, except this time there were other images added to my vision. I saw what looked like DNA being produced by two red gears that had hundreds of red human spirits inside of them, pushing the gears to move. After looking at this for a moment, a yellow-green glowing centipede rushed past me. It was so close I thought we touched. As my perception faded into the darkness of the underside of my sheets, I realized there are spirits within spirits. It takes thousands of spirits to maintain my spirit. There really are realities within realities, without boundary or comprehension of one another. However, they somehow manage to coexist. 6 th Time/DMT/ Same day-3 rd Time/ “Nothing Out There” After finishing the last two sessions, I decided to try DMT outside to get more light. Unlike Salvia where I saw the visions better in the dark, DMT visions are better seen in the light, yet my eyes still must be closed. I was sitting outside, feeling as though there was another intelligence in my presence, wanting to communicate with me. I demanded to be taken out of this reality and be shown what my inner reality truly is. I also wanted to be taken into space. I began a dialogue with an unknown being who told me there is nothing in space. It 42

said I belonged here on Earth and they had created all this for me. I responded with a harsh, “Bullshit, I know you’re out there, and I know there are realities I haven’t seen!” It assured me I was wrong, and there was nothing out there. I was then shown the inside of a large cube that had streaks of green-glowing dashes moving along the black walls, reminding me of the Matrix,” with the “ones” and “zeros” forming the illusionary structures. In the center of “The cubical room stood a person composed of grid lines and lacking any other features. The grid of this person was red on the bottom, orange in the middle, and gradually faded to yellow at the head. As I watched this figure I was told again by the unseen entity, there was nothing else out there except for what spirits had created. There is only here and now. It said they were trying to keep me entertained and focused on this reality. Opening my eyes and seeing the trees in front of me, I did have a new sense of appreciation for my daily environment. A sense of calmness, satisfaction and euphoria came over me as I looked around. I felt as though I had been given a Christmas present. 7 th Time/DMT/ Same day -4 th Time/“Inside the Ship” Right after session six, I refilled the pipe and tried again. I wanted to take in as much DMT as possible in order to get visuals with my eyes open. This time I asked that the unseen, intelligent being come and pick me up with its ship. I thought of the Pleiadians, the so called entities that Billy Meier has had contact with. Once the smooth smoke of DMT entered my being, I was returned to the frequency that allowed me to see a kaleidoscope of yellows and oranges. Then, out of nowhere, a red-colored UFO came spinning sideways across my field of vision. It stayed to my left for a minute, as my vision changed to a dark space with blue-glowing orbs in the formation of a square, while other globes spun around it. Without knowing where I was or what I was seeing, I asked if this is what it looked like inside their ship. They responded with a yes. I looked down and saw a multitude of silhouetted red spirits. Suddenly a very strong feeling of love overcame my being, leaving me with a sense of connection to those entities. After recognizing these profoundly deep emotions, I became aware of movement as I ascended through the Earth’s atmosphere. I saw the many different colors of reds, oranges, and yellows that made up the Earths auras. It was like flying through a rainbow. All the while, an intense euphoria filled my inner being to the point where there was no room for any other emotion. There have been times in my life when I could feel a variety of emotions at the same time. This time was certainly not the case. It was as though I were at the center of a universe in which nothing existed except euphoria. Once I reached past the Earths aura I saw nothing but blackness, but the intensity of euphoria left me in a state of calmness. I sat in the chair for a moment longer, contemplating what had just happened before opening my eyes. I felt very relaxed and at peace with myself, grounded to the spot where I sat. It was as though my spirit really did go on a long journey and now, back in my body, it felt at home. 8 th Time/DMT/ Same day-5 th Time/ “Soul Growth” Immediately after the last session ended I took another hit of the DMT and with no particular questions in mind, I tried to break out of reality with my eyes open but soon gave up and closed my eyes. 43

First, I saw a small light radiating outward toward the center of my closed eyes. After a moment, a small yellow silhouette of an infant emerged from the light, and was soon surrounded by a second figure this one was orange and about the size of a teenager. Following that one, a red silhouette-figure was projected around the first two silhouettes. This one was walking towards me, and I could make out some feminine features. Once the vision faded away, I had a strong urge to call a girl that interested me at the time. I feel as though all that is needed for me to feel complete in this world is to be with my soul mate. Yet I know I must first find out who I truly am, and be content with myself before I find whoever she may be. 9 th Time/DMT/ Same day -6 th Time/“The Moment in Time” As I allowed the DMT smoke to flow into the depths of my chest the feeling of wanting to be with my soul mate remained. I closed my eyes and saw a small yellow box in the distance. This yellow box began projecting itself into a long, square, twisting corridor, changing colors gradually from yellow to orange and red. It opened up to a space where there were glowing red silhouettes of standing people. I could hear human voices, but was unable to make sense of their chatter. As I looked around the crowd of spirits, I could see what appeared to be a mother holding a baby, the father standing nearby. Outside the square tunnel was an orange energy surrounded by bright piercing yellow light. I was left with the impression that this would be the moment in time when I might be the happiest in my life, when I have a child with my soul mate. 10 th Time/DMT/ Same day -7 th time/“Illusionary Boundary” Once again I tried to tear apart reality with my eyes open. I had to force them to stay open as closing my eyes while doing psychedelics had become a habit. I was staring at the shed door shaking my head from side to side, trying to rip reality apart, to no avail. It remained with only a blue glow superimposed over everything. Eventually I gave up and closed my eyes, seeing red, orange, and yellow flower kaleidoscopes twirling about. My teeth were nearly buzzing with an intense euphoria as I stretched my body on the chair. My body was literally vibrating to a new frequency. After smoking DMT seven times within an hour, I felt happy and excited to be in this reality, yet free of its illusionary boundaries. I no longer felt trapped inside it, but as if I were a part of it. I had an urge to run through the woods naked. As I got to the tree line I hung my bathrobe on a tree branch and removed my watch. Now standing there with nothing on my body except my own skin, I began to walk deeper into the woods. Feeling the damp ground on my feet I felt even more connected to nature, leaving nothing to separate me from it. Unfortunately, I soon began to feel a bit too connected with nature when mosquitos started to bite me. I grabbed some ferns, as they are said to repel bugs, and put them in my hair, and grabbed a few more for swatting. I felt like a member of a tribe. I knew that there were important things to do, and continued to walk further. Soon, I reached the field where I first learned to go beyond myself, where I had discovered that I am all-powerful and at the same time insignificant. I found that I am 44

infinitely dualistic in nature, constantly flowing from one extreme to the another, trying to balance myself on a central point of consciousness. Near where I had learned all of this, a small purple weed was nestled in the thick grass. I picked it up, looking at it more closely now, feeling like this was my diploma from the spirit world for moving up in my spiritual understanding of consciousness. While knowing that there is so much more for me to learn, I felt as though I had reached the next step. That little flower at that moment felt more important to me than any other diploma or award ever presented to me. It occurred to me that this is what I had come out here to find and I was ready to head back. With the flower in my left hand I briskly jogged back. I felt even closer to understanding my true self, and where I wanted to go in this life. 11 th Time/DMT/ “3 rd Eye Transformation” In a room full of other people all journeying to other realms, I joined them with DMT. Thinking of nothing, I was pleasantly pushed deeper into my chair with a powerful smile stretching across my face. First I saw a blue spirit of a person that slowly started to have a light glow from its stomach. Then the person transformed into a snake. It seemed to be a rattlesnake, as I could see its tail shaking. This image vanished away rather quickly, bringing the next image. A Mayan-looking stone face appeared to be twirling around, yet all I could see was the front of its face. It was smiling and had triangular, maroon eyes. There was a bright yellow light in the shape of the snake’s rattling tail centered over its forehead. The face remained in my field of vision while the outline of a hallway in purples, pinks and blacks emerged to the right of it. There were two doors in which two grid-lined females came out. They too were colored purple and pink with black inside. My conclusion from this experience was that my third eye had been transformed from my limited human consciousness to a primitive, reptilian self that had lain dormant within me. Regarding the two women in the hallway, I think the reason I saw them was because I had heard a girl coming into the room towards the end of the trip. This is why I don’t recommend doing psychedelics in a party setting, with the exception of the type of entheogen I was about to experience next: LSD.

Chapter 7 Lysergic Acid Diethylamide (LSD) - The 4 th Entheogen I had been interested in LSD for a while, after reading about it in a book called Psychedelic Drugs Reconsidered and other resources. It appeared to be the holy grail of psychedelics, and I had to give it a try. Also, after reading about it, I could not understand why it was illegal. There were nothing but positive and beneficial uses with no harmful side effects 45

presented. Beer and cigarettes are, without doubt, many times more harmful to the human body. Yet, these things are illegal because they would challenge main stream religion, cut heavily into big pharmaceutical companies profits, and turn people into peace loving individuals that would see no reason for wars, making them want nothing to do with the military or the corporate agendas set by our government. Seven dollars is what I paid to get my single dose of LSD. It was such a small amount, I had doubts it would have any effect on me at all. My friend Devin told me it would be enough, and that I should do it an hour or two before going to the Disco Biscuits show I was to attend later that evening. I contemplated this for a while because I had never done it before and wondered how I would react under the influence of this drug within a large group of people. I was also thinking of it like Salvia, where I would need a quiet environment with nothing to disturb my visions. I then remembered an old friend telling me that acid is something he wished he had had while we were at a concert. So, I decided to take it before going to the show. (Picture goes here-“Serpent Energy“) It took about an hour and a half before I started to notice anything. I felt giddy and a bit off balance and started to have perceptual distortions. Whatever I was looking at, my full attention would be locked on it for a good amount of time until I noticed that its surroundings were stretching a great distance, as if I were looking into the Grand Canyon. I would look to the depths of my vision, focusing on whatever happened to be there. Then I laid on a bed while listening to a Shpongle CD in the back ground while talking to friends, taking a moment here and there to notice if I could see anything with my eyes closed. The first thing I saw were a group of blue energy streaks falling down in the shape of a cylinder. Then, below this emerged the outline of blue-glowing snakes that snapped both at me and at each other. They seemed to be connected at the base. I watched this for a moment until they began to fade away, continuing to talk with my friends. While conversing with a new friend out on the catwalk of a hotel, I kept thinking about the cops who were in their undercover vans looking for someone to bust. Just the night before, they entered any room that was left open and searched it, looking for illegal drugs. I saw one guy get put in the meat wagon the night before, so I knew they meant business. I thought of them like the Mr. Smith agent from the movie the Matrix, looking for anyone attempting to escape the reality of the Matrix. Like Mr. Smith, the police were confiscating psychedelics as part of their jobs, not knowing that the rule might be in place in order to keep the users from freeing their minds. Psychedelics give you the chance to see things with your true sight, your third eye. Since my paranoia about the cops was getting to me, I kept insisting that we leave for the show. They reassured me that I was fine and that we would be going soon. I patiently waited a bit longer until they were ready to go. Walking down the stairs was entertaining. It looked like eight flights down when in actuality, it was only one. It reminded me of when I was a kid walking up the stairs to a haunted house, strobe lights flashing. As I spoke to some people at the entrance of the hotel, I started to notice an increase in saliva secretion and my jaw began to tighten. As we walked to the show I confided in one of my new friends from the 46

hotel, explaining to her how wild it seemed to be tripping, yet interacting with this world at the same time. I was confronted with so many new insights, that it made me wish I had a way of easily recording my thoughts. Once we were in view of the Calvin Theater, my immediate concern was to get past the cops undetected. I knew they were going to be there, because they had been there the night before, when we saw the first show. I locked my arm with my new friend who knew what I was experiencing. It felt like a protective shield of reassurance. As we blended in with the crowd at the front door, I continued to look forward and away from the cops who were close behind us. Once in the first foyer I felt safe, and was moments away from getting my ticket. I also began to feel connected to everyone, as if we were all mentally in tune with one another. Getting my ticket felt like I had been handed a diploma for the psychedelic journeys I had been studying over the last year and a half. I felt excited, and deeply happy I had made it that far. It felt more rewarding than getting my high school diploma, my black belt in karate, associate’s degree at Hudson Valley Community College, or even my Eagle Globe and Anchor at my Marine Corps boot camp graduation. Once we had passed the security check point, we linked up with our other friends who were already at the bar. The mirrors affected my perception of the room, but before I could play this visual game, we headed to our seats, which, incidentally, did not correspond to the tickets. (In fact, I don’t think anyone sat in their designated seats.) I picked the best ones I could find, which were in the middle of the first floor about three quarters of the way back. (Picture of “Spirit Molecule”) I sat down and instantly noticed something I had not seen the night before: a mural of an angel on the ceiling. It appeared to be in a tunnel, and with my new LSD vision, I watched it sway back and forth in 3D. Due to the poor lighting all I could make of this figure was its silhouette. After examining it for a minute, I saw the bottom half that looked like a pine cone and both sides of the stage containing pine cone motifs. It appeared that the hidden genius of this image was the angel, the symbolic, winged pine cone of the “Spirit Molecule”, DMT. I read Dr. Rick Strassman’s DMT: The Spirit Molecule, in which he discusses the connection between the pineal gland in the brain and DMT. DMT is a psychoactive chemical that helps us dream and is produced when we are born and in large amounts just before we die. I learned that our brain is capable of creating enough of this chemical to help us make the transition between the physical world and the spirit realm. I also watched “The 2012 Enigma,” a video by David Wilcock, on YouTube.com, in which he shows the curious fascination the Catholic Church has for the pine cone symbol at the Vatican. The pineal gland has the same shape as the pine cone. I considered the question of why would this connection be displayed in plain view, with the use of symbols? Is there a secret society or mystery religion that had put this whole thing together? Do secret societies use psychedelics to expand their consciousness? I mean, why not? I had already seen evidence of Christianity possibly having started with the use of psilocybin mushrooms. At www.gnosticmedia.com, I remembered seeing a painting of Jesus and four psilocybin mushrooms with green leaves. I had also seen this image in my college art history text book, but at the time thought nothing of it. In addition, many tribal societies in the world use psychedelics for initiation into adulthood and divination. It’s their 47

religion. I told Devin of my thoughts on this, and had his girlfriend take a picture of this angel mural for me with her cell phone. I sat and contemplated the image. It looked like a Roman warrior beating a drum. The music that was playing supplied a beat. It made me feel as though the angel were commanding respect and attention. It certainly had mine. (Picture of “Dimensional Matrix”) Just before the show started, I closed my eyes for a couple of minutes and saw myself, colored green on my hands and knees on a floor made of green pulsating energy. The floor glowed outward for few feet around me, and it became translucent. Under the glass like surface were copies of me doing the same thing. The copies faded into infinity, leaving me believing that I am truly without an end. Without my noticing it, the band had gathered on the stage and the music had begun. The lights came up, fully revealing the picture of the angel as a winged woman in a flowing dress. It was beautiful. While everyone else was having a great time, I stood like a statue, watching the band and probably did not appear to be enjoying it. Nothing could have been farther from the truth. I was completely in tune with the musical vibrations they were producing, and loving every second of it. I could see they were playing the notes in sync with the colored lights shining on the stage. Each color had its own frequency. After about an hour and a half of non-stop playing, some of the crowd had to take breaks. I, however, thanks to the LSD, had no need for a break, much less a bathroom trip. This surprised me, because it was cold on the way there, and the cold usually makes me have to urinate. I thought to myself, this is a really good band to listen to while tripping as they played consistently for about two hours without the typical breaks other bands take. I understood why people still went to the concerts even after they’ve gone sixty plus times. I also realized how much more I was enjoying the band this time, compared when I was drunk the night before. I was able to understand and feel the music more easily than before. When the band finally ended their first session, they got the best applause I have ever heard a band receive. (Picture of “Choose Your head”) While everyone made beelines straight to the bathrooms or the bar, I sat down to close my eyes and explore what other possibilities awaited deep within my mind. After a brief moment of darkness, a large square rushed up, stopping short in front of me. I looked down its length, from the viewpoint of its closest corner, and was unable to see its end, as it stretched beyond my view. Within it were open square shelves housing what looked to be spirit heads that glowed blues and reds on their outlining features, while the rest of the face had a light green tint. The shelves themselves had a bright blue glow. Each face was different and I felt once again that I was in the Matrix, and had the choice of whichever spirit head I wanted for this life. After seeing that, the vision faded into darkness. (pic “Spirit Meditation”) After a little more wandering around in the darkness of my mind, materialization formed. I first saw a photographic negative of a crowd of people standing and staring at me. White lines from behind and above the crowd shot out, crisscrossing, making odd-shaped squares. Within these squares floated other people sitting in Indian style with their hands 48

together, as if praying or meditating. The only thing I could gather from this image was that these people were in a meditative state of mind while watching the band. (picture- “High-five’ Your Buddha”) Once again there was a period of thoughtless blackness before the next vision appeared. Almost before I realized it, a blue glowing person appeared, sitting Indian style, giving a line of blue people, high-fives as they walked by him. As their hands touched, a golden ray of light vibrated out from where they connected. I thought perhaps the golden light color represented the way emotional energy is seen in the spirit world. If we connect with other people peacefully we vibrate more brightly, enhancing our connectedness with our true selves. So give your Buddha self a “high-five”, and become as bright as you can. The band was back in gear, giving an excellent performance. I was able to last the second half of the show, about two hours, without needing a break. While being in a Zen type focus until the end, I stood there like a statue, in awe of their excellent performance. Only in the end did I break my trance to give the Disco Biscuits the sincerest applause I had ever given a band. (Picture “Masonic Woman”) The walk back to the hotel was fairly uneventful, and once back in our room I nestled up in my sleeping spot on the floor under a table. With a blanket over me and my eyes closed, I tried to see if there was anything else LSD would show me. First I saw a flash of the concert, and again thought, “Do secret societies use psychedelics?” Who else would use symbols to show the importance of the pineal gland? Then, a vision manifested of what looked like a woman’s face, covered with black and white squares. She did not have eyes. Instead, the eye sockets were tunnels into which the squares flowed. Her red lips were closed, making her appear somewhat expressionless. There were no ears or hair on her head, and she was devoid of a body. The face stretched out from an unseen source, distorting the black and white squares. Once the vision disappeared into blackness, I began to think that perhaps the Freemasons were the ones responsible for the creation of the mural at the Theater, because black and white squares are considered to be one of the Freemasons symbols. (picture “Machine Within”) I opened my eyes and looked at the wallpaper as it moved and shifted in slow circles. Whatever I focused on kept me entertained before closing my eyes again. This time a figure emerged. He was half man and half machine, splitting the difference vertically in the middle, consisting primarily of glowing blue wires. He seemed to be in convulsions of pain, as if being electrocuted, his body twisting and jolting. Once the vision faded, I felt as though the man represented me, trying to tear through the illusion of reality. I was having a difficult time accepting what I imagined to be the truth and seeing what everything really is, conscious energy. I suppose that it’s difficult to accept that our beliefs can actually be truth. I don’t believe that I am a machine underneath, but I was getting to the nuts and bolts of who I really am; a program within an illusion. Thinking about the last vision, I eventually got up from under the table and relieved 49

myself before mingling a bit with the after party crowd. I saw the art work of one of the Disco Biscuit fans on a poster representing all the band’s songs in the form of characters on a globe. It made me realize how much this band means to people. Once the artist left, I burrowed back underneath the table to try and get some sleep, as it was already three in the morning. After laying there for some time with a consistent, entertaining form of distraction from the people in the room, I was finally able to see one more vision before falling asleep. (picture “Serpent Woman”) The vision came before I even realized it. It was as if it was already there, waiting for me to experience it. This time I was looking at a blue, naked woman who appeared to be laying down in the deep darkness with her head facing towards me. Her turquoise eyes gazed deeply into mine, while giving me a sly smile. Her left hand reached to her mouth, touching it with her index finger. As a red snake-like tongue emerged, slithering in a seducing manner, I noticed that her lips, nails and snake tongue were red. As we stared at each other I felt I were being drawn into a Medusa trap of lust. I was attracted to her, yet distrusted her intent. Once the vision faded, I really had no idea what to make of it, except that I desired to be with a woman. I didn’t understand where the blue skin and the snake tongue came from and what it meant. Quickly giving up, I laid there for a few more minutes before being sucked into a deep sleep. Four hours later Devin shook my leg to wake me up silently without disturbing the others so we could leave before the day was gone. I quietly put my shoes on, rolled up my blanket and within a couple minutes we were out the door. While driving home we discussed the night before. Telling him all that I saw while on LSD, I sensed that the most profound revelation I had come to regarding the previous night was that physical life is the biggest trip of all. He agreed, and asked if I thought that there was energy focused where the sun was shining through the clouds on the mountains ahead. I told him I thought so, but perhaps concentrations of energy are constantly moving, flowing to different areas of the earth.

Chapter 8 From Skeptic to Believer Since the beginning, my friend Skip would listen to what I had to say about my Salvia experiences with a healthy dose of skepticism. I told him the things I was seeing could not be just mere hallucinations, that what I was seeing and hearing was real, but in a different frequency of perception. There was no way my brain was responsible for them. Since the beginning he was not only a skeptic but was disinterested in even trying it. One day he wished he could go back in time and talk to a girl he was once interested in. He was having a difficult time getting her out of his mind. I had been telling him that the way to do Salvia for the first time is to clear your mind and see what happens. Then ask questions or ask to see things the second time. Whatever is on your mind will play a significant part in your experience. Eventually, he decided to try it. When he came out of the trip he told me what he had seen, 50

finally concluding that there was no way what he saw was a mere hallucination. It was somehow more real than this physical reality. It gave him something to think about for the next few days and made him eager to try it again, but in a different way, as he did not like inhaling the smoke. I told him I could buy a plant so he could chew fresh leaves the way it is traditionally done. The experience may last longer by doing it this way. I too have wanted to try this method for a long time but so far it had just been more convenient for me to smoke it. For months, I had not smoked Salvia, as I have not been searching for anything. However, I began smoking it again after Skip inspired me with his experience regarding time-travel within the Salvia world. There is no physical proof that these other realms exist. One must learn through direct experience. But might I ask, are thoughts real? You can’t see or hold them. Does this mean thoughts are not real? How about when you picture something in your imagination? Or when you have a dream? Just because people other than yourself cannot see whatever it is you see doesn’t make it any less real, does it? I guess that my attempt to convince the skeptics in this world might not only be futile but perhaps contrary to the programmed nature of this illusion itself, which is built on a dualistic code. There will always be two sides to a coin, just as there will always be two sides to everything that makes this place in our mind what it is.

Back to the Search 42 st Time/Chewed on dry Salvia leaves first, then smoked Salvia Zone Green Level/ “Spirit Time Travel Machine” Sitting on my bed with nothing but a crack of light shining through the window, I kept ten-to-fifteen dried Salvia leaves under my tongue for about half an hour. I thought of how I wanted to be shown the key moments of my future. Only feeling slightly aware of the effects of the dried leaves, I gave up, spitting the saturated leaves out into a bowl and filled my pipe with the Salvia Zone Green Level. Once the smoke filled my lungs, I set the pipe aside and held on deeply to my demands. When I exhaled, I felt my spirit condense into my Pineal Gland. There I saw a smaller version of myself in my head, manipulating the controls of my body. Each version of me was only revealed by the outline of his body which was blue and purple. I drifted back from the larger body to where I could see a white-glowing cylinder going into the stomach region and out through the back. I suspected that this represented my time-line and realized that everyone has his or her own time-line. Time does not surround us, but rather goes through us. The vision faded then changed, revealing a sphere of white lines rotating counter-clockwise. Both at the top and bottom of this sphere the lines converged to an unseen end. Its rotation was very fast. I heard a woman’s voice say she had to slow down the time generator in order for me to be able to enter the future realm. Once the voice stopped speaking the time generator slowed down, but never stopped. Next, I saw myself in front of what looked like a sun with a hole in the middle of it. Its light reflected off me, showing a red outline of myself. In the center of this sun was space but soon the stars started to race towards me as I 51

was blasted through a portal toward a different planet. As I got closer to the planet I could see smoke around me, as if I had been shot through a gun barrel. Soon I realized the planet I was looking at was Earth. A blue spirit reached up and held the Earth over its head, while two turquoise spirits held him up, and three green spirits held up those two. Then there was a wave of yellow spirits running from left to right across the bottom. As the vision faded, I could feel the return of my spirit starting from my face all the way down to my right ankle. After this vision I felt as though I would be one of those people saving the planet sometime in the future. I wondered from what, and how would I do this. Will I do something environmentally? Spiritually? Even protect it from some sort of alien invasion? Will I be held up at earth, striving to survive? I felt connected to this planet more than ever before, and felt I must do whatever it takes to hold up Earth, no matter how impossible it may sound. (show pictures of “To the Control Tower”, “Time going through Me”, “Time Generator”, Portal in Time”, and “Holding up Earth”) 43 nd Time/Residue of DMT and Salvia 80x/ “All That Matters” I wanted to try DMT and Salvia at the same time, but the only DMT I had was some residue left on my pipe screen. If DMT is responsible for the visions we have when we dream, and I smoked Salvia right after smoking DMT, it would be like doing the Salvia while in a deep REM sleep. Besides, I knew I could smoke DMT and still have control of myself before smoking Salvia. With both pipes ready, I sat on my bed thinking about what I should do concerning this book. I pondered whether or not I should get it published, wondering if it might cause problems for me. I had a perfect record. I had never gotten a ticket and had committed no crimes except for using illegal entheogens. I had a great job resume, and writing a taboo book may jeopardize all of that. Because I had experienced all of these substances, an ordinary person might think I was incapable of holding a job. The truth of it is, all my employers had had nothing but good things to say about me and would rehire me in an instant. At that point, I felt in my life nothing else was as important as sharing my experiences, and showing the world what I had seen. I also had a primal thought laying in the back of my mind: a wish to have a family of my own. I felt as if I had asked all I could in my pilgrimage and felt I had reached a resting point in my travels of self-discovery. As many more thoughts came rushing through my mind, I quickly erased them with a few deep breaths before smoking the DMT. Once I had a decent amount of DMT in me, I took the other pipe and took a hit of 80x of Salvia. I held it in longer than I thought possible before releasing it out into my bedroom. I sat upright in my bed and rested my head on the wall. I closed my eyes, focusing only on a single red circle. My perception moved back from the circle, and came to rest on a light blue, luminous column. There was a sparkling sphere enclosing the red circle. I then zoomed back in on the red circle and realized that there were two figures inside, holding hands and walking. They too were glowing red, with a slight hint of orange in the center of their being. While watching the two walk, I saw the taller figure bending down in front of the smaller one, and instantly felt that their relationship was mother 52

and daughter. I was consumed with emotions of love and happiness, and felt that these two figures were already a part of my life. They were the center of my attention. Nothing else mattered and nothing else existed. I then noticed that they were inside a dandelion in its seed mode. I knew all I had to do at that point was to focus on my wish and blow the seeds of desire out into the world and wait for them to grow. (Picture of “All that Matters”) 12 th Time/DMT/ “The Ra Connection” I asked to be connected to the eleven-eleven people, who formed a movement to take one minute of your day at 11:11am to meditate, sending out your positive vibrations into the world in hopes these vibrations might have a positive impact on mankind. I asked to send my thoughts of love out into the world, then sat on my bed and let the first wave of DMT smoke enter my being. At this point I should explain that my room is set up with the one window on my right and the dark wall on the left. As I sat there, I turned my head from side to side. I wanted to see the difference from light to dark with my eyes shut. I got the notion that love is of the light and entirely absent in the dark. When love is not used, one cannot truly see. Pure love is in a narrow bandwidth of energy, and when it is felt there is no symbol or word that can give anyone any true grasp of what it truly feels like. I was now vibrating with a high-intensity electrical love, which was when I was shown what love looks like. My vision displayed brightly-colored red and yellow patterned circles swirling in every direction while a red snake slithered out from behind one of the red circles. (picture of “love frequency” DMT-3M) Once the vision of the love frequency faded, I had another request of the DMT: to be shown what people truly look like, and to see them for what they truly are. Once the smoke flowed out of my mouth, I gently laid back down on my bed. I looked into the darkness to see what I could perceive. Looking up with my eyes closed, I saw a small, bright light suspended in the darkness. Rotating around it were broken rings of blue light. It reminded me of a thumb print. (Picture: “True Blue” DMT-3N) I shifted my gaze deeper into the light, and saw a bright, red-glowing face of a woman being sucked into the light. She looked like she was screaming but I was unable to hear her. (Picture: “Vanishing Projection” DMT-3O) My third hit of the DMT, showed me yet again another way of seeing people as they truly are. I saw a bright white orb shining in the center of a brightly colored red being, while all the colors of a person’s chakras radiated out. (Picture: “Aura Projection” DMT-3P) I began to feel that I was attracting the attention of some other entity due to my current quest. I focused on two dark forms that looked down at me as though I were laying on a table getting prepped for surgery. A cool sensation in my stomach began to form and from there a purple light began to stream out. Within this purple light were black geometric shapes, constantly transforming while lifting up away from my body into a black void. I could then see that the dark shapes that stood over me were Greys. They informed me I was lucky, as they had 53

extracted negative energy from my being. They then asked if there was anything else they could do for me. I inquired if I was ready to be harvested into their dimension. I wanted to know because I had just finished reading Law of One: Book 1, which talks about progressing to a higher spiritual plane. I received no answers, but as I looked around, I saw one blue spirit standing next to another that floated perpendicular to the ground about waist-high. I watched the second spirit get absorbed into a sphere of light in the wall. I then understood that our spirit body stores all the information accumulated in our lives. When we move on, it is downloaded into the universal consciousness, a harvest of souls. While lying there, I looked down toward my feet and saw a blue human spirit standing motionless, as black, geometric shapes morphosed over its surface. A sphere of white light encircled by a black ring shone from the back of its head. Although its surroundings were dim, I thought I was able to make out glowing wires that may have been connected to it. (Picture “Spiritual Operation” DMT-3Q) I wondered if simply wanting to go to the next dimension was not a good enough reason to be accepted. So I asked to see RA, which is a 6th dimensional entity discussed in the Law of One book. I was quickly told that I could not perceive, or even begin to grasp, what RA looked like, as it was beyond my comprehension. Before I could protest, I was thrown into RA’s Dimension to show me how correct this was. First, I saw what looked like green glowing worms in tubes, but the tubes themselves seemed alive. Then there came three circles in which millions of geometric shapes were moving about, transforming in endless ways. Three silhouetted figures which looked like Greys was superimposed on each of the three circles. This image zoomed back and forth while all three circles rotated. The entity was right. So much was thrown at me that I was barely able to imagine, much less comprehend what it all was. I opened my eyes and felt quite baffled. I decided to drop my pursuit. I packed my bowl one more time with DMT and thought I would like to send my loving energy throughout the world. Once the DMT impacted my lungs I felt as if I had been slung back down onto my bed while being told, “That’s it! That is what is needed to be harvested!” Right then and there I felt as if I was leaving my body, and going to a place of infinite love. I saw a beautiful swirling white star surrounded by different intensities of brightly red geometric patterns flowing around it. (Picture: “Nearly Harvested” DMT-3R) I developed a fear that I was actually leaving the physical plane, and had to insist that I wanted to stay. I have so much more to accomplish in this life, and my mother would be sad if I left. I believe it was her more than anyone that kept me from letting go. Despite my pleas, I felt as if I had no choice in the matter, that my actions spoke louder than my words. After some time I opened my eyes and saw my hand propped up on my bed sheets and heard the sound of cool air blowing through my window. My hand looked lifeless, as did the rest of my body, as I stayed completely motionless. I felt like I was still fighting to stay, but it was too late. I felt as if I were going to die, but only in a physical sense. I knew my loving energy was about to be plugged into the universal consciousness in order to download all of my memories, therefore making it even more knowledgeable. I soon sensed that I was not going into this alternate dimension. I would remain in this world. 54

I realized why the world is the way it is; why it’s not filled to the brim with love. It’s frightening to freely and completely give up the love of one’s self. At least that’s the case with me. It seemed to me that this is what is required to move on to the next dimension, give your unconditional love without asking for anything in return, while at the same time letting go of your ego. We hold on to our egos tightly, because we imagine that they are what makes us who we are. Once we lose our layers of ego, we are no longer what we picture ourselves to be, but are further undistinguishable from the rest of the Universe. 13 th Time/DMT and Salvia 10x/“Quantum Jump” I asked to quantum jump into a parallel reality. As the smoke transported me, I saw a grey face, wearing an Egyptian head piece. From the top of its head came two snakes, one on each side. The face was covered in geometric squares in a constant state of fluctuation. The whole face moved out towards me, bringing a block of the wall with it, which also had the same geometric squares and coloring. As quickly as the face came out, it went back into the wall. I was drawn into a space behind me. Once completely in the wall, I was pulled into a dark space, and watched the face move away from me. From there, I descended to another realm. I saw the back of a woman with shoulder length black hair wearing a yellow shirt and blue jeans. She was standing on a dirt path under a blue and sunny sky that faded into a crystal clear view of midnight stars. Suddenly I was flying backwards. I dropped through a window and into a sort of factory. The walls were mostly pink in color, with purple geometric shapes surrounding the three windows that gave me a view of the woman running on the dirt path. The spinning geometric shapes gave motion to the woman’s movements. Once the woman reached the third window, my vision began to fade as I flew through the colors of pink, purple, and blue before entering total darkness. I opened my eyes, amazed at what had just transpired. I was able to witness ways in which different levels of reality have an effect on one another. I considered the Egyptian face, along with the pink factory, to be a part of the DMT realm, while the woman was a part of the Salvia world. I was able to figure this out through my experiences with both Salvia and DMT, recognizing the differences between the two visions. After these experiments, it occurred to me that the DMT realm is the foundation of the Salvia realm. I then formulated my theory of the substances I’ve used, such as Salvia Divinorum, DMT, Shrooms, and LSD. Each can tune you to a different frequency, helping you perceive a different level of reality. I believe if you take the right amount, with the right question, you can experience the source of all creation with shrooms. The next level down would be DMT, because to me, it seemed less dense and is filled with more light. Third would be LSD, because your thoughts carry you to denser visions. Last on my list would be Salvia, because not only do I get visuals, but I can also hear things in this realm much clearer than the others. This may not be accurate of course, as I have only done a mild dose of LSD, and if I had a chance to do a larger one, my views might change within that level. To conclude, I think different entheogens can tune us into different frequencies, giving us different perspectives of the unending levels of reality. If I had been on my own I would have asked to finish my last vision, but I was with some friends and it was their DMT, not mine. I told them it was great, but I did not want to 55

smoke anymore, as I did not want to use the rest of their DMT. Plus, I felt I had learned what I needed to learn, and even though I did not get to go where I wanted to go, the journey was all I needed. 14 th Time /DMT/ “See You On The Dark Side Of The Moon” Half an hour after doing my Quantum jump, my two friends James and Hana offered me the chance to do DMT one more time, and to do it with one of them at the same time. I agreed. We sat for a while, thinking of what we should try to focus on during our trip. I told them I think you can go pretty much anywhere with entheogens as long as you ask first. After several minutes I proposed that we try to meet on the other side. They liked the idea, but Hana was baffled, because she had thought of this herself when we were talking in the kitchen. So, James and I prepared our pipes, while Hana sat and watched. Before lighting up, I jokingly said, “I’ll see you on the dark side of the moon.” After a few deep breaths I lit my way beyond my understanding. A brightly glowing red snake’s head came into view. Its mouth was open, as if it was preparing to eat me. I noticed there was a purple and blue version of it in front of the red one. Their heads were, for the most part, very circular, and reminded me of babusca dolls. I was pulled backwards into a dark tunnel, guided along by a silver rod, passing the same version of the snake heads at even intervals. I sensed that I was not going to see James on this journey, but still tried to focus on my intent to see him. But then I thought what if I kept my eyes closed, but looked in his direction? I tried this just to determine if that were all I needed to do in order to see him. I looked to my right and came out of the tunnel. I saw a creature that was orange in color with flaring tentacles. In the midst of the tentacles flew a small white ship, projecting its small flame as it turned slowly towards me. The ship had a small window, and a blue stripe running along its side. After watching for a while the vision began to fade into fewer and fewer vibrations of light. Once back to this reality, I stared at James until he came back from his journey. We immediately started joking about how we did not even come close to seeing one another. First, James gave his account on what he had seen. I then gave him my account. My two friends looked at me dumbfounded. I asked what the look was for. They told me he had seen the same thing as I did. Either I did not hear him correctly at first, or had not understood what he said, but after talking a bit longer, we realized that we had indeed seen each other, just not in the form we had thought. It turned out, he was the ship in my vision and I was in human form, but with tentacles for legs. I had been colored blue with some traces of pink. In one of my Salvia experiences when I asked to see myself face to face, I had seen myself in a blue-pink color. That fact really got my attention. James also told me he was in a tunnel, passing by red colored balls, and ended up in the midst of the orange tentacle creature. We sat for a while, speechless as the realization of what had happened engulfed us. Once again it was proved to me that these other realms are real. I no longer need faith of the afterlife; I have had the experience and know it to be real. 44 th Time /Salvia/“ Let’s Go” 56

One day I was teaching my friend Oscar how to smoke Salvia, as this was the first time he had ever smoked anything. After watching him go through some halfway successful attempts, I decided to do some myself, thinking perhaps he would get a better idea of how to do it by watching me. So, as I took a couple of deep breaths, I thought of a question about my artwork and took a hit. I put the pipe on the coffee table and took one last look at Oscar sitting on the couch across from me before I closed my eyes. The smoke left me as the red spirits came. The spirits began pushing themselves into the shape of a square, while telling me, “Let’s go!” I was consumed by a feeling of needing to leave in haste. I opened my eyes and saw Oscar standing a couple feet in front of me with the window behind him. I could tell by his facial expression that he was anxious to wrap up the session. I realized that the spirits were not only showing me where my friend was, but also of his intentions. I gathered my things as we talked briefly of his experience, which he found to be fascinating. But he wanted to be completely finished with it before his wife came home. This particular session showed me one more thing I can add to my list of possibilities with Salvia. That is to show other peoples intentions and possibly even their thoughts. Once again Salvia had shown me it’s incredible power. 45 th Time/ Shroom Tea-Salvia 10x/ “Vibration Connection” At nine o’clock in the morning, Al made some shroom tea. Both of us had about five or six small caps a piece. While sipping and nibbling at the tea we talked about our intent for this particular session. For me, it was to See everything as it truly is: pure energy. I also wanted to connect with nature. I had always wanted to do shrooms out in the woods, but during my first two uses, I had been living in a city where there wasn’t any woods for miles. Doubts ran through my mind regarding the chances of my getting to See today, and Al told me that he gained that ability through meditation, and then only after two years of practice. The ability to See takes a great deal of mental discipline in order to cease all thoughts. Without thought, reality loses its form and essence, thus allowing one to See. For this shroom experience I wanted to let go of all expectations and see where it would lead me. Although Al hadn’t openly stated his plan, I knew he had one. After about thirty or forty minutes a peripheral vibe began to draw my attention. We sat outside on his back deck and listened to some music. I started to meditate, which seemed to come more easily as all the distracting thoughts had been blown away. Staring up at the trees, I began to feel as if they were a Magic Eye mirage slowly waving a message to me. I closed my eyes and immediately saw a kaleidoscope of reds, oranges, and yellows. It looked like a DMT trip I once had. Several red silhouettes in human form came walking toward me. They were vibrating out their energy in oranges and yellows, melding into one color with each other. Purple waves of energy vibrated from the music, temporarily changing the color of the spirits. I opened my eyes as I realized that our spirits have no definitive edge to them - our energy blends with the energy around us. The vibrations of music change our energetic state. I told Al of my new realization, while also noticing that I was not going as deep as I had the last time I did shrooms. It was also taking a long time to reach my peak. He looked at me with a big grin on his face and said, “Everything has to be, now, now, now,” noting my impatience. 57

He was right, but nevertheless I began to giggle uncontrollably. Once I settled down, he told me the lyrics to the song we were listening to, “There is peace above me, below me, and all around.” I felt an even higher level of peace within me that acted like a protective shield from my fear of the unknown. As the CD called Life for Rent by Dido kept playing, I paid close attention to her lyrics, becoming entranced, realizing their wisdom. Al went inside to take a shower, leaving me feeling unguided and lost. At that point I began to get an urge to run through the woods. When Al came back we talked about smoking salvia in the woods, so I gathered my pipe and some Green Level of Salvia Zone. As we walked to the woods I saw that he was carrying something in his hand. When I asked to see what it was, he showed me a pipe I had never seen before. It was small enough to fit in the palm of his hand and looked like a golden crown with a black tube attached. He showed me the contents inside: Cannabis. I sat on the bench as I watched him smoke his bowl. When he seemed done, I told him I would do Salvia even though I had nothing to ask. I had an urge to test myself against the Salvia, to see if I could smoke it while standing up. From previous experiences with Salvia, I had learned that it takes away your sense of balance. Nevertheless, I was about to try and stand while smoking. I stood in a small, grassy clearing and widened my stance as the smoke flowed through me. After three long hits with no results, I told Al, who was sitting nearby, that perhaps shrooms makes Salvia inactive. I re-packed my pipe and took a second hit, and this time something happened. I felt a presence behind me, particularly on my left side, and wondering what it could be, I twirled around like a dog chasing its tail. Al got up and stood beside me, telling me that what I’m sensing is my Ally. I inquired what it was. He told me it was not a spirit, but rather a force that keeps everything together. I looked back and saw attached to my back a black shadow with purple highlights. A phantom force began to push me deeper into the woods. Al followed me, seeming to know what was going on. I asked him if he was doing this and where I was going. He told me he was not in control but assured me that I knew where I was going, to my power spot. I will admit sometimes I give too much credit to Al’s abilities, but each time we meet he reveals more of them to me. I know he’s holding on to many more cards, waiting for the right moment to lay down his whole hand. I just hope someday he shows them to me. I told Al how amazed I was that I didn’t fall down and I was actually walking while in the Salvia trance. He reminded me that I was good friends with Mr. Saliva and he would not let me fall. Once we reached my power spot, a location in between some pine trees he had picked out for me two years earlier, he got to his knees and closed his eyes. I stood a few feet away, preparing my bowl. He stood up while I smoked with a clear mind, void of any thoughts. Before I knew it, I was walking forward and backward within my power spot at great speeds. I told him, “Look! I can walk just as easy backwards as I can forwards!” It indeed felt just as natural to walk backwards, as it did forwards. Not only was I amazed at my new ability to do this with such ease, but I was able to feel the energy of the trees as I got closer to them. When running backwards I was able to stop myself before hitting the trees, without looking. After running backwards several times towards the edge of my power spot I turned my back towards a single tree. I moved around the tree with my back still to it, with the palms of my hands feeling its energy. Once I circled the tree I kept my eyes to the right, while moving my 58

body to the left. I did not know why I was walking to the left, I just felt a pull of energy guiding me until I saw trees encompassing my view. I stopped to see where it was leading me, and was amazed to see that it was taking me through a hallway of trees. I did not trust my new sense yet, but nevertheless, it was correct. After this we started to head back. While jumping down over a small ledge I felt so light. The need came over me to test my “gate of power,” a technique taught by Don Juan in the Carlos Castaneda books, to run in a certain way that enables you to maneuver effortlessly through the woods at night. I dashed off the trail, picking my knees up to my chest with my hands configured in the shape of a gun. I flowed over jagged rocks, sticks, and bushes, zigzagging through the woods until I finally stopped about 75 yards away from Al. I looked at the trees around me and realized that I was not gasping for air, and was in no way tired. I had tried that same type of run before, in place, only lasting a few seconds before having to stop for air. Another amazing thing was I did not twist my ankle. I linked up with Al and we discussed the energy I had. He told me shrooms were once used for hunting. I told him I could see how that could be true, as it gives you more energy, increases your hearing, gives you great night vision, and takes away hunger. The only down side that I could see was that you’d better not find anything funny, otherwise you would be laughing your ass off, as I had earlier. I told him to imagine if you could feel the energy of plants all the time. He said that Buddhists actually have that ability. I then asked if he could. He didn’t answer until a few days later when I told him there was a square pattern laid out in the grass in my power spot. He remarked that when he walked to it he could feel a barrier. So, without directly saying it, he does have the ability to feel the energy of nature. Later in the evening we smoked the rest of our shrooms, which consisted of only a few remaining flakes. Al was getting a good buzz off it, but I was getting no results. I decided to smoke Salvia instead. Again, I had no questions for it at the moment, and just let it take me where it wanted. I saw a slew of red spirits flowing in multiple directions. I suppose, with no guidance from me, they can’t give any. I told Al to forget the shrooms and smoke Salvia instead. He took a hit of the Salvia and left me for several minutes, as he entered into a realm I was unable to perceive. Once he returned, he began to tell me that he had gone to a place where a woman was sitting at a high judge’s seat telling us to go back. We took that as our cue to go back inside as the night fell upon us.

Chapter 9 Cannabis (Queen Tetra, Pot, Weed, Marijuana, Hemp, etc…) - The 5 th Entheogen

Distinguish the difference in my writing; once I did Cannabis my writing became more poetic. 59

Queen Tetra (Cannabis)/“I’m Laid Back and Chillin” It took only four good hits of the Queen Tetra (Cannabis) to propel me through the veil. I let go of all judgments, as there is only one true judge: me. I felt a scan of my body as a warm tingling line made its way up to my head, numbing me in the process. While a comfortable pressure built up in my head. The anxiety was released through popping my ears. The fire in my chest was extinguished by consumption of hummus and chips. Then the spectacular thought game played out in my mind. A heavy weight of calmness and relaxation glued me to my chair. Reclining back, eyelids shut, feet kicked up, I listened to Nirvana. Sun rays penetrated my awareness, bleaching out the world in yellows, oranges, and reds, so that I was hearing only the tweeting of birds. I became peace. The download was complete. I sat back up to take a look around, only to be captivated by my new perspective. Nature held a new fascination with me as I stared at a line of clouds passing over the horizon of trees. The power of my mind either created or deciphered the shape of the passing clouds, leaving none unrecognizable. I took a bite of yogurt and realized that my habits have been very rigid and conformed. My entire life I have always sat and finished whatever task I was performing before moving on to the next. The ethic of being is productive, but debilitating to my stress meter. I stood up and pranced around, signifying my understanding of the beautiful gift that Queen Tetra had bestowed upon me. I named it “Dr. Happy Green,” as it prescribed me a pill called “I’m Laid back and Chillin’.” The phone rang with a chore in mind to pick some grass for the birds. Meanwhile, my banana gun was on the ready while making my patrol. I was a perturbed bird on patrol, hunting grass to feed some birds. After eating my banana gun, I finally reached the chicken fence and threw no more than five blades of grass in, as I was experiencing a considerable amount of compulsive laughter. I opened the bird door with my finger and pointed like a gun telling the hens to “Freeze,” as I was there to take their eggs. I grabbed an egg at the far end of the coup while bracing myself with my left arm against the far wall. I noticed the birds coming towards me. They were perturbed and wanted revenge for the meager dinner I had given them. They stared me down with one eye as I burst into laughter and tried to push myself out of the house without falling into their shit. Only after a tank of laughing gas had escaped me was I able to be free of their spell. Thank God I was able to get out of there without bird poop on my face. But the danger wasn’t over yet, as a mysterious noise came from across the road. I ran to the other side of the bird house to hide. During this, the birds seemed to have chosen the sides with the noise and started to squawk at my presence. I told them to be quiet, but that didn’t work. After five minutes of debating with myself, I resorted to running like a bat out of hell. I made it about ten feet before laughing myself to a near stop. I reached the side of a hill and dropped to my knees before laying down. I began to roll around with outstretched hands holding the egg above my head. After reaching the bottom of the hill I went back up without any effort. I felt like I was being rolled around in a circle by invisible hands. After one and a half rotations I was stopped by some bushes that seemed to have a lesson to teach me. They told me to let go of my fear and look up at the trees above. I gazed at the blowing leaves and saw blue diamond sparkles shining through the cracks. A merging of realities became a beautiful display. 60

My gate of power activated as I stood up. I walked backwards over the circle I had created in the grass. After three successful passes of a tree branch coming within inches of my head without looking, I spiraled inward to the center of my being. From there, three lower branches waved at me, enticing me to step on them, to climb my way to the top, discovering life is an infinite tree, an emergence of consciousness. Each tree is forever and becomes a new tree an infinite number of times. Lessons started to come from multiple spirits, one after the other. The first one told me there is no direction for me to go, because I am already where I need to be. Next, I was taken inside my own mind and watched railroad tracks impossibly switching tracks at 90 degrees, linking me to new concepts. I gained an understanding of how memories are linked to one another. I walked up to the blue diamond tree and found its face. I gave it a kiss on the lips, thanking it for its gift. I strolled through the yard with a twirl here or there while sniffing a flower with delight. I realized that my old step was all about the destination and not about the journey. I lay on my trampoline with my eyes focused on the trees while thoughts whispered in my mind. One such thought was that I don’t want to be alone. Next came a spirits reply, “Yes, but you can see so much farther from the top. Life is like a tree. If you are one of the leaves on the bottom, you are surrounded by other leaves blocking your view. Whereas on top, you are alone but your view is far grander.” I agreed but did not care. This class was over as I headed to yet another classroom. (Insert pic of the Archway) On my way to my next class I looked at a tree stump that showed me the answer to a riddle I did not know existed. The first part was the pine cone used as decoration over many doorways as a symbol of the Pineal Gland, the gateway to this world. The part that I did not know was what the meaning of the two twirling symbols flanking either side of it was. The tree stump told me that one is the symbol of the infinite light, while the other is a symbol of darkness, each representing the golden ratio. I sat back down on the deck and felt like the Pink Panther, so smooth, so relaxed, and so cool that my Mojo could put any girl into an instant trance of desire. I let go of my childhood hero from the fourth grade, a crime dog by the name of Scruff McGruff, knowing he was no more real or truthful than Santa Clause. I too am a made-up character, assembled like a machine in a factory, turning out bits of illusion with my thoughts. I asked the spirit of all things to create a children’s puzzle game that would be called life. So I wondered, if we dream of angels when we sleep, does that mean angels dream of us when they sleep? Does that mean we are all dead or are we simultaneously “dreaming” and awake? My thoughts transitioned to the power of words. Magic surrounds words, molding the holo deck of life. But, where do the words come from? Do they come from thoughts or desires? I suppose you have to desire something in order to give it thought. So where do desires come from? This question leads me to the conclusion that we are preprogrammed before coming into this life. It seems as though desires are the fuel to thoughts, and thoughts create words. When the words are spoken, they vibrate a harmonic tone that puts things into 61

place. This world we are in needs help, so it’s time to find who is doing the programming of words and fire them before I float away to cloud 9. By the way, where is cloud 10, please? Later that night I talked to Al about my experience. I told him that for the first time in my life I finally experienced a true high, for I had smoked Cannabis before without getting to the nirvana state I had reached today. He told me I was not ready for it until now. I said I don’t like calling it weed or pot, as it sounds like a derogatory name for something I perceived to be so wonderful. So I asked him what he calls it. Queen Tetra was his reply, as its main psychoactive compound is Tetrahydrocannabinol and the plant you smoke is the female because it has most of the THC. After telling him of my communication with spirits and my reactivation of my gate of power, he told me I had trained my mind to the point where it was getting easier for me to communicate with spirits. The reason he smokes Queen Tetra is to communicate with spirits and nature. I never knew Cannabis could be used in such a way, as I had never seen anyone get to the level I had achieved. He reminded me that the most important factor in using any substance is your intention. Intent overrides your beliefs and guides you like a fixed set of train tracks. I said my only standing conviction of its effects is that you can’t do anything while using it. He replied, “Only if you let it.” The use of substances is a two way street: either you control it or it controls you. He reminded me that one can become addicted to anything, such as gambling. This made me realize that no matter what, I have control over myself and my intentions. I told Al that the lady I was going to meet at the Mexican airport to do an Iboga trip with had canceled due to illness. He said the Iboga spirit was not ready to meet her, but when I meet the Iboga spirit we will be equals, because all is one, and all is nothing. His message made me feel worthy of the Iboga spirit, yet I still felt the Iboga spirit would be the one doing the teaching, not me. The whole next day I still felt ultra-chilled and relaxed. It was a wonderful feeling. Only by the third day did my old rusted self-merge back into my body.

Chapter 10 Iboga Journey - Revealing My Whole Life - The 6 th Entheogen The night before the flight I dreamed of my right hand. First, I was in a shower room that looked like it was part of an ancient palace and it was huge. The time and place changed to the present, where I was walking rather hastily through a shopping mall. Passing a crowd of people, I turned to run up a flight of stairs, batting a person out of my way and throwing him to the ground like a rag doll. Once I reached the second floor, the darkness hid many frightening creatures. I was looking for something but I didn’t know what. I returned back to the first floor where a group of people huddled over the man I had pushed away earlier. 62

Convulsions of death rattled his breathing. As I put my hand over his chest I consumed his soul through my hand. I noticed my hand looked like that of a reptile. It was green with long fingers and sharp black fingernails. The crowd was in shock and began to pursue me as I ran away from them. My mother was shopping and as I approached her, I pulled off a mask I had not seen the front of. I told her that they think I’m Quatzequatel. Before she answered me, everything turned to a black consciousness of awakening. After two months of preparing my mind for Iboga and saving enough money to purchase it, I was finally on my way to Mexico. Round trip from NY to Mexico City cost me $623.98, while the Iboga experience was $1,500. Going through Albany International Airport was nothing short of getting strip-searched. I’m surprised they didn’t make me do a hand-stand. My flights were for the most part, uneventful. After getting my ticket scanned at the Houston airport, I entered the hallway leading up to the plane. There, unexpectedly, three police officers waited to question passengers about how much money they have on them while the drug-sniffing canine sat a few feet away. After showing them my passport and confirming I was not bringing more than ten thousand dollars to Mexico, I was allowed to go. When flying over the gulf, I was able to see several patches of brown-liquid spots floating on the water, which must have been from the Deep Horizon oil spill. A flight stewardess gave me some customs papers to fill out before reaching the Mexico airport. On the form they asked for your name, passport #, destination, and length of visit. There was also a space for purchased items, in case you bought anything in Mexico and wanted to bring it back to the states. They also wanted to know the cost of each item, so they could tax you for it later. I got off the plane in Mexico and followed the crowd of passengers to the first check point. I saw a sign that read “Foreigners” where I split off from the main group. I had my passport stamped and walked through another set of doors leading to the baggage claim. Since I already had my small backpack with me, I went to where an airport security person told me to put my bag on the conveyer belt as I walked through a metal detector. Once my backpack was cleared, another security officer told me to push a red button. While doing this, a green light lit up a clear plastic screen with a walking person etched into it. Only then was I allowed to go through the last set of doors that led to a huge foyer. I walked through a crowd of people watching the disembarking passengers coming off the plane. There were a couple of money exchanges open where I was able to convert my money. I walked down a long hallway looking for a taxi and ended up in a parking lot. I heard a woman speaking English on my way down and asked her if she knew where the taxies were. She told me that I had to go back the way I had come and that there would be a sign saying “Authorized Taxi” to my left. Simple enough, but when I finally got to it, the sign was small and out of the way. It was no wonder I had missed it the first time. No matter, as my relief had turned into excitement, for I was one step closer. I walked up to a taxi, but was stopped by a man who redirected me to a booth where I had to pay in advance. I gave the clerk a copy of the address where I was going. He typed away as he showed me that it would be 1500 pesos. After agreeing to the cost, he printed me four tickets. I began to wonder if that meant I would be changing taxies on the way there. I quickly forgot about it and approached the taxies again, 63

this time I got into one. I sat in the back seat for what seemed like ten minutes, wondering where the hell the driver was. When the driver got in, he motioned me to sit up front with him to have a better view. I instantly knew I was going to enjoy this ride. The only problem was that I didn’t speak any Spanish and he didn’t speak English. Nevertheless we had an interesting, incoherent conversation consisting of nods and smiles, and some made-up sign language. We drove through the city where I saw many playgrounds, Volkswagen beetle cars and graffiti artwork that should have been on display. I tried to explain to the driver why I was in Mexico through my made up sign language. In the end, however, I think all he got out of it was that I was here to eat some food that will make me crazy. We left the city and headed south, flying at 90 miles-per-hour, passing several broken-down buses. The buses that were running seemed to have had broken rear shocks, making them tilt upward as if they were getting ready to blast off into outer space. I was happy to have spent the extra money on a taxi rather than the buses. Speeding over the mountains of Mexico, the driver asked if I wanted to stop to eat and I agreed. We parked in front of several closely packed restaurant stalls. The food and the kitchens were out front. I went to the bathroom only to find the toilet did not flush. When I stepped out, the driver was washing his hands in a bowl of water. I did the same and followed him to the front. We looked to see what they had to eat while the owners offered to make me a chicken Cascade. I tried to explain to them that I could not eat meat, as the guy who would be giving me the Iboga said not to eat meat or cheese for three days prior to use. He also said that I should eat lightly. Once I realized that the cooks in the kitchen did not understand any English, I began using my made-up sign language. First I pointed to my finger saying that I couldn’t eat meat and made the gesture of throwing up. But what really got them laughing was when I tried to explain this by biting my finger. I quickly joined them by laughing at my own show. I picked out what looked like potatoes and bread with bottled water to drink, while the taxi driver had a coca cola. Minutes later, the taxi driver was served two chicken Cascade’s, while I was served a potato sandwich, which turned out to be quite good. I could eat one of those sandwiches every day and probably never get sick of them. I paid for the both of us before we went on our way. We drove on to the outskirts of my final destination. The view opened up to a small city laying in the depths of a foggy heat. Once in town the taxi drivers GPS was actually asking the locals where my destination was every so many wrong turns. I began to wish that I had printed a map of my destination along with bringing my own mechanical GPS. I wondered whether or not I would ever see the Iboga man. My fears vanished quickly with the comforting thought that there was a force guiding me there, that I would fulfill my destiny, whatever that may include. After talking to ten or so locals, I finally reached my destination. The first clue that we were at the right place was a truck with a Vermont license plate. The taxi driver started to drive closer to the house as the car dipped over some steps. I tried telling him to stop beforehand but it was too late. Luckily he was able to drive back over the steps. I thought for sure we were going to need a tow truck. I got out and thanked him with two hundred pesos, and he was off. I shook hands with Barry and received a kiss on the cheek from Veronica. We made 64

small talk before Barry showed me his beautiful home and the room I would be staying in. I fell in love with the place instantly and wished I could live there myself. After dropping off my bag and grabbing my graphic art pictures that are a representation of what I’ve seen on psychedelics, I headed back to the front of the house where Veronica was preparing some Peyote medicine. After she finished the bottle of Peyote she handed it to me to smell; it smelled like perfume. I told her it could be used as such. She told me it’s a great medicine that can help with many illnesses, but never specified which ones. I showed both Barry and Veronica my pictures, which seemed to bring out an aura of enthusiasm in them. A white man came up to the house carrying a load of laundry and Barry introduced him to me as Alexi. He was one of the helpers of the Iboga Quest, and lived just yards down the road. He told me he was from Philadelphia and had been in Mexico for two months and loved every minute of it. We talked for a few minutes comparing the States to Mexico; Mexico won on the virtue of the peaceful energy the place had for him. In Philly, the natural energy is suppressed by the power grid of greed and confusion. Barry led me to his back yard which was nearly the size of a football field, with three hammocks and a table with four chairs. We sat at the table and talked about philosophy, our backgrounds, and the state of the world. Veronica seemed bored at times, so I would throw her a question every now and then. While she told me about her first shroom experience, her age dissolved away as her enthusiasm enriched her story. She told me that while on shrooms, nothing happened to her for a long time. This angered her and she became impatient, and it wasn’t until she went swimming that she was able to connect to the most beautiful extraordinary visions she had ever seen. At the same time, she felt the pain and suffering of her friends. I told her how I thought it was some sort of omen to her to heal the pain of others. She was not so sure about that, but nevertheless it was what she was doing now, in whatever form she could. Eventually she left, and Barry and I talked in the candlelight. When we began to talk about my book, Barry mentioned he was once a part of a publishing agency and could help me with it. He told me those who write for fame and money don’t do as well as those who write for the love of producing literature. I told him that originally, my purpose for writing about my experiences was due to David Wilcock’s advice to those who want to remember their dreams by writing them down. It also provided me with a path to help remember where I had been, guiding me in a straight line so I would not walk in circles. Once I began to accumulate numerous pages, I saw that it was becoming a book. Now I know my purpose in this life is to show people the realm that exists beyond our five senses. In these other realms, I feel as though there are entities that want this information shared and are helping me to make it happen. This realization came when I thanked the Salvia for all it had done for me. I had seen the spirits holding onto my spirit, guiding me through my entire journey; it was like a force I couldn’t stop until it was done. Silently, in my thoughts, I thanked Barry for making me look back at my own intentions, which had shown a hint of greed. I needed to rid myself of it in order to succeed. By eleven o’clock we finished our conversation and I went to my room. Within a half hour, a thunder storm flashed its approach. A flash of lightning lit the window through my closed eyelids and revealed several small aliens standing at the foot of my bed. Veronica was 65

right, that place had a lot of energy. I soon fell asleep to the sound of the high winds of the storm. I had an apple for breakfast the day of the ceremony and some fresh mango for lunch. I stopped drinking water at 2:30pm so I would not be interrupted as frequently by bathroom trips while on Iboga. I talked to Alexi in Barry’s living room for a few hours before the ceremony. He told me about some books I should read, including In Search of the Miraculous and Don Juan Papers by Richard de Mille. Alexi told me about a group of people called the “Brother Hood of the B.” They travel the world experiencing different psychedelics. He told me how to decalcify my Pineal Gland by either staying in a dark room for five days, or by following a special diet consisting of brown rice with lemon juice and basil leaves, eating no sugar or salts for four days. This would also be a good diet to try before doing Ayahuasca, a psychedelic mixture of two plants, one containing an MOA inhibitor and the other carrying DMT. Ayahuasca tea makes one purge, so it would be good if is already cleansed. I laid down on a hammock for a couple of hours prior to the ceremony to gather my thoughts and get some rest. By 6:30 pm, the Iboga pills were taped to an index card with my name, height, weight and age on it. Alexi and I talked for a while about the way in which I would be taking the pills. He also told me that the dosage is 16mg per one pound of body weight. I weigh 160 pounds, which equaled to 1.1 grams dispersed in the five pills. From behind me came a girl I hadn’t met yet, walking toward me with a large white flower in her hands. Next to her was the man Barry and I had helped move to his new home earlier in the day. I shook hands with the girl as she told me her name, and then that the flower was for me. I thanked her as she sat across from me with the blossom still in her hands. It was the first time someone had given me a gift without physically handing it to me, and my memory of her presence was one of the best gifts I had ever received. Once Veronica had come out of the house holding her cat, the six of us walked further into the back yard with their dog. She put her cat in the tree, demonstrating that pets had to be present for this particular ceremony. No entity was left out, as all are equally important. As Barry came to my right side he quickly told me of the six directions: north, south, east, west, the sky above, and the earth below. While we all spaced ourselves a few feet apart, Barry blew into his sea shell horn and Alexi shook his sea shell rattle. After one full breath of the horn, we turned to face each direction, repeating the same process until all six directions had been acknowledged. I felt as if we were calling the attention of all the surrounding spirits. Veronica came to me with her smoking jar and went over my entire body with the smoke, and then did the same for the other four people; then it was her turn to have Barry do it to her. She headed back to the table and covered the dog and the cat with the smoke as well, which nearly made me laugh out loud. Barry and Veronica went to my room, cleansing it with the smoke. I sat at the table in the back yard and took my first pill with some fresh ginger tea Veronica had prepared for me earlier. She explained it would help with the nausea. At this point Barry told me I should go lay down on my bed and in forty minutes he would be in to give me my second dose. Laying down on the bed I could hear the group talking outside, so I put on my head phones and selected the song “Detaching from the World,” by Emil Gadliardi and Melanie Schreiber. I thought of all the things I wanted to accomplish during the session: stop being 66

negative, let go of fear, find my soul mate, see my future, acquire the power to control this reality, transfigure my mind to be in sync with my wishes, meet the Iboga spirit, and to see things as they really are. These and many more wishes lingered in my mind as I waited for the threshold to open. Forty minutes later, Barry came in with my second dose of two pills while asking me how I was feeling I told him I was fine, and felt as if my acupuncture points were energized. My eyes felt like they were being massaged by invisible hands. At the same time a vortex of energy swirled between my eyes, reaching into my third eye. Sometime after taking the second dose, I began to hear a ringing noise. I took off my headphones and realized that the ringing was coming from within me. I left them off and paid closer attention to the noise. A line of energy covered my body, scanning, searching and prepping me. I became numb. A metallic buzzing noise that sounded like a mechanical bee filled the entire room. At first I thought there was a bug in the room, but when Veronica came in with my third dose, I knew it was not of this realm. I took the forth pill and asked Veronica what caused the flashing I was seeing on the walls, as I thought perhaps they had some sort of strobe light outside. She told me it was the medicine and that mother Iboga is a gentle but hard mother and said I would be fine. I laid back down as she left the room and began to feel nauseous. I not only felt like throwing up, but my entire body felt like it was going to be puked up by something, while the Iboga’s effects squeezed the water out of my pores. Barry came in to offer me my final dose, which I refused for the moment. I threw up in the plastic bowl that was sitting on the night stand next to the bed, and then called out to the baby monitor. Barry came in, and I told him I felt better and wanted to take the last pill. Five pills in and the real ride had begun. I told myself I had better pay attention to what I would see, as I knew I would not have another opportunity to experience this particular substance. The thought of a black hole in the center of my being came to me. It collapsed in on itself and sucked me into another realm. Blue ripples formed in the blackness, opening up into a tunnel of purple rings and threw me into space. I flew past the moon, heading for the Earth before realizing my final destination was surgery. Seeing myself laid out on a table while my blue spirit-shell was removed from my body. To my right, a gray alien was using some sort of rod to numb my jaw. Above me was a spinning, circular light that made a buzzing sound. Towards my feet stood another gray alien looking at pictures on what looked like a light wall for viewing x-rays. It was rearranging photos, throwing some to the side. That environment faded to darkness as a series of frightening black and white faces flew at me with incredible speed. The faces eventually stopped, leaving a new image of a bug being held by the limbs by an unknown force. It’s cartoon-looking face seemed terrified as it, watched its own limbs being torn apart one by one. My sympathy went into overdrive as did the ringing in my ears. My reasons for being there were addressed at an extremely fast pace in a series of dream-like images, without my even having to think about it. One vision was of my mother waving goodbye to me as a young child going to school: I never figured out what the true meaning of that was. Lesson two was an egg-shaped grid, spinning around in the void. I pierced the blue grid and saw a bright white orb in the center shooting out lightning bolts to the inner walls, which housed small television screens that captured scenes of all the moments 67

in my life. It was at that moment I finally understood why there is suffering in this world. We exist on the edge of consciousness that projects out into the void of the unknown, which scares us. I flipped through the pages of my entire life but only a few images stuck with me. One was of me standing with a book in one hand with my wife and child in the other. I knew this would be one of the happiest moments in my life. The final image was the one I was able to look at the longest - that of myself in a coffin as an old man. My request to be in control of reality was answered by showing me the way focused attention can give us the power to call into creation the world in which we live. Any time a negative thought came to me, my ears would ring, stopping only when I thought of something positive. Dream-like images of different times in my life appeared as a movie. Whenever I felt like entering, I would go inside the screen to become a part of the environment. I was time traveling. I looked at Veronica as she asked how I was doing, only to find my eyes were closed and my head was on a pillow. As I got up, I looked around the room and found it empty and dark. This happened one more time, except it was with Barry. The only explanation I could think of to describe this was that their spirit was checking up on me, without any of us consciously knowing about it. (Iboga Pictures (#2) go here) Going to the bathroom was extremely difficult. Barry told me to move as slowly as I could to avoid getting nauseous. Once I was standing, Barry stood behind me, placing his hands under my arm pits as I walked with my hands out for balance. While I skittered over the ground, it pulsated in the flickering candle light. Five minutes or more seemed to be the walking duration for a twenty-foot trip to the bathroom. Once in the bathroom, I threw up in the sink while peeing in the toilet. I felt like I had to take a shit but I knew I was constipated. Once I made my mind up to leave the bathroom, it took quite a bit longer for me to actually do it. Once back in bed, I threw up again within minutes. My second assisted bathroom run was with Veronica. Her technique for helping me was to stand in front of me while I held on to her shoulders. This procedure was easier for me, but I enjoyed Barry’s method as well, as it showed me what I had in me to walk on my own. After the first eight hours or so of throwing up and receiving intense lessons, I finally dozed off for a bit before processing all the information I had learned. For the next twelve hours I lay in bed sipping water a little bit at a time while going over what had transpired. I could feel that I had regained my emotion of love, something I had let go of many years ago because of a woman, but also through the brainwashing of the Marines. I now felt like I could love anyone. It was a wonderful feeling. All my questions had vanished as well, as they had all been answered by the Iboga. I started to think of all the life changes that I wanted to make once I returned home, and couldn’t wait to start. Twenty-four hours later, I went to the front of the house where there was a table and began to eat some crackers at a slow pace. I talked to a new arrival for a bit and learned he was there for his methadone addiction. I only told him it had been well worth it for me. I did not say anything else, as I did not want to spoil it for him. Later in the evening I got to participate in his ceremony. That night, I slept very well, dreaming of my freedom from the attachment of a certain individual. The next morning I had my first real meal in five days: oatmeal. While I was eating, 68

Barry asked me if I had a feeling of clarity. I had not realized it, but, I was very much at peace with my thoughts. I felt as if I had been meditating for years, transformed without even realizing it. I finished my meal, washed my dishes, and did some writing in my room. Around eleven o’clock Barry and I walked into town, which took about thirty minutes. He had bought some fresh food to bring back. After getting what he needed, we stopped for lunch. I had Guacamole soup and lime juice, which turned out to be really refreshing. We talked briefly about the town’s history, and then were joined by one of his friends who produces documentaries of different cultures. Before finishing up our meals, another one of Barry’s friends ran into us, a woman in her mid-forties who practices holistic medicine. Barry introduced us and told me she was one of the people he suggests for those who have used Iboga, as part of an after treatment process. She helps to bring the body and spirit back together. Even though I felt great, I agreed to see her anyway. I helped Barry haul some groceries in the canvas bags that he had brought. He told me I should stay away from grapefruit for a couple of days, as it doesn’t mix well with Iboga. Our walk back was pleasant, and we spoke of many things. I asked if he would mind if I mentioned his name in my book. He did not care either way, but he was already being steered toward a path he had not anticipated, which was expanding Ibogaquest.com. He had wanted to keep it small, but there were so many people desiring this service, that it was hard for him to say no. He told me people were calling him, telling him if they didn’t get the treatment, they were going to die. The other reason he had wanted to keep his treatment facility small was because he was retired and did not need the money. However, it felt good for him to see people transformed for the better after the treatment, and how appreciative they were after. I told him I had heard only of thirty or forty clinics, in the world but no more than that. Even if they had one of these clinics in every state of every country, they would still be full. The struggle is that there are more people in need than there are clinics. That evening I sat with Alexi and Peter, talking about the nature of reality while Veronica made quesadillas for us. After eating Veronica’s wonderful food and washing the dishes, Peter and Alexi went to take care of some things. I sat back down at the table and talked to Veronica in the dark of the night. She told me about a Cougar meditation practice she had done where you sit in a dark room for nine days, just watching your thoughts. There are other people to help you with the sanitary/food logistics. I asked her what the benefit would be in doing this. She said it leads you to realize how your thoughts are replaying the same story in your head that, in effect, creates your unchanging life. By doing this, you give yourself a chance to make up a new story. I asked if she had ever taken Iboga. She said yes. It was after her first time that a message came to her to provide treatment for other people with Iboga. She told me that plants choose people, just like the student will meet their teacher when they are ready to be saved from their ignorance. Thus far, I can say I have been one of the lucky few to be saved by Iboga. I bid her goodnight, as the next day I would be going hiking early in the morning. The cell phone alarm buzzed at 7:30am. I got dressed, filled my two water bottles, and made some noise, waking up Alexi. Peter was already awake, getting ready for the hike up Tepoztlan. This surprised me because it was just eight hours ago that he did the Iboga. The 69

three of us walked to the main road where we caught a cab to the center of town to get some breakfast. After walking around a bit we ended up eating in the center of the market place where we all managed to eat for less than four dollars. The food was better than most restaurants in the States. The walk to the base of the mountain was all cobblestone. At the base, there were several stands selling souvenirs. Most of the hike up was stone steps. We were a quarter of the way up when Alexi and I left Peter to his slow pace. I had a massage appointment and if I were going to make it in time, I had to get moving. After another ten minutes of hiking, I left Alexi behind, and handed him my extra water bottle. The higher I climbed, the more I noticed there were several paths that all seemed to head in the same general direction. I say seemed because at one point I looked back toward the city and saw the pyramid to my left farther down the mountain. I looked at my overall surroundings and figured I would just keep going up to see where it would lead. I eventually got above and behind the pyramid. It was a far better view. Standing there on the windy, grassy top, I breathed in the air while watching three eagles riding the same currents of air. I felt as if somehow the eagles soaring above me provided the wonderful view, and thought of the book I was reading at the time called The Eagle’s Gift by Carlos Castaneda. I felt that I had finally won a battle in my mind that had raged for as long as I could remember. There was no conflict within me anymore; I was at peace. I thanked the eagles for the view before looking for a way down. I did not want to go back the way I had come, as it would take too long, and I still wanted to see the pyramid up close. I decided to head straight to it. I hooked around the hill and started to make my way down a small ravine that was certainly off the beaten path. I came to three drops, each ranging from fifteen to twenty feet. The first two I was able to spider-man climb down, but the last one I had to use some small roots to climb onto a ledge to my right. Half way down the roots broke and I twirled a couple of times before dropping to the ground. A cloud of dirt rained down on me. Given the three drops, I was scraped up, dirty and a bit shaken from the adrenalin. Relief came back to me as I found the hiking path. I looked to my left and saw the stairs leading up to the pyramid, and to my right I could see where I had gone before. I now know why a Mexican who was painting the rock looked at me funny; he was probably painting a sign not to go the way I went. No matter. I was excited to know I was not going to die on that mountain and that I got to see the pyramid up close. The pyramid was not that spectacular, and after taking a couple of pictures I headed back down at a running pace. Once I reached the souvenir shops, I bought a couple of things before continuing my search for Peter and Alexi. A couple of blocks from the base I saw them waiting for me. We quickly exchanged stories while looking for a taxi back to Barry’s. Alexi told me that I was lucky to get past the one Mexican at the pyramid without paying. I had seen a man sitting at the front of the pyramid with a radio in front of him, apparently charging people to see the pyramid. It was a poor setup. You bust your butt getting up to the pyramid, only to find out that you can’t see it unless you have money. Alexi said the man probably did not bother with me because I was all dirty. By the time we got back, I was thirty-eight minutes late and the massage lady had 70

already left. Barry told me we could reschedule it for the next day, although I was already scheduled for another appointment with the homeopathic doctor. Exactly what she did I still did not know but Barry ensured me that it would be well worth it. I took a shower and got into some fresh clothes, leaving me feeling like a new person. By one o’clock Barry had dropped me off at the Doctor’s clinic. I walked into Ms. Belendez’s office and noticed she had a Reiki table set up, along with a full cabinet of bottled medicine. As we sat down, she asked me about myself. I inquired what specifically she wanted to know. She wanted to know of any traumatic events that had occurred in my life and if there were any emotional baggage I might be carrying with me. After telling her a few things, she sat across from me and explained what it is she does: EFT or Emotional Freedom Technique. This is the tapping of certain points on the body while repeating a positive message relating to any existing emotional problems one has, therefore releasing the negative thoughts trapped in the energetic body. In my case, she focused on my fear of losing my friend in the Marines to gunfire, my fear of getting shot in the head, not feeling good enough for others and myself, letting go of an old crush, and always feeling a need to be ready for an attack. After she had addressed each one of these issues, I felt somewhat better, especially when she addressed my fear of being shot in the head while I was in Haiti. I felt a significant pressure lift off my chest; I had never truly realized what an emotional burden that had been on me for nearly six years. Once she finished with the EFT, she looked in her homeopathic book to find a medicine for the rash on my foot, which I had acquired in Haiti from walking in sewer water. Later I found out it was eczema, and the rash started from my boot rubbing on my toe. She gave me a small bottle containing the energetic memory of arsenic. I told her I was into holistic medicine and began to ask her all sorts of questions. She saw my enthusiasm and wrote down a few things I should check out. The contents of the list included, The Genie in Your Genes, www.soundstrue.com, www.hartmath.com, and The Vortex by Ester & Jerry Hicks. After thanking her, she charged me 500 Pesos and I tipped her with an extra 200 Pesos. I left with one of the massage ladies who walked with me to get a taxi and told the driver in Spanish where I was going. I thanked her as the driver left her in the rearview mirror. As soon as I got back to the Iboga house, Barry was getting ready to go on a little road trip with Veronica and Peter. Barry invited me to come along so I joined them, riding in the back of his pickup. Peter and I both sat in the back making small talk as we drove through the furnace-like air of Mexico. Once we arrived at our destination, Barry pointed out to us the pool and sweat house that belonged to his friend. After talking to the owner, I found out that we were in a place designed for spiritual seminars. We were there to see whether Peter would want to stay here for the remainder of his stay, as Barry had more people arriving and would no longer have a room for him. After the owner showed Peter his room, along with the rest of the facility, he agreed to spend the rest of his stay there. Peter had one more night he would be able to stay at Barry’s. Meanwhile, I looked at a book called Osho Zen Tarot: The Transcendent game of Zen by Osho Zen, which was very insightful. When Peter, Barry, and the owner came back, we talked a bit more while Barry told Peter he could come back to the Iboga house during the day, as a taxi ride would be very cheap. 71

Peter had planned a two-week trip. I stayed six nights just as Barry had encouraged me to do. Typically Barry was able to house a person for only five nights; any longer and it would cut into other visitors chances to see him for an Iboga treatment. This was the reason behind Barry’s efforts to find other places nearby to house more Iboga patients. In addition, since there were those who had decided to stay for a couple of months, Barry had been able to find places very close to the Iboga house, enabling his clients to keep in close contact with him, in case they had other questions or concerns. Once you have passed the Iboga treatment, you only need an extra day or two to get yourself together. In my case, I was anxious to go home and try out my new state of being. Once back at the Iboga house, Barry decided to take all of us out to eat. Alexi joined in and we walked to a restaurant a few blocks away, only to find that it was closed. The five of us piled into a taxi in search of another place to eat, and ended at a seafood restaurant with a good view of the surrounding mountains. I ordered fish that came with the head still attached, which was alright, but Barry and Veronica had a shrimp soup that I quickly decided I had to have. It wasn’t until the end of the meal that Barry insisted paying for everybody. He said he was not in the business to make money but to change people’s lives, and my life was one of them. We decided to walk back since we were only about a half hour away. As we walked, Barry and Veronica were up front holding hands while I walked with Peter and Alexi in the rear. Hearing Alexi talking to Peter I thought about how different I felt, how at peace I was with myself. The war within me was over, leaving me with one last desire-a soul mate. But where to find her? Later on I realized that looking outside of myself was getting me nowhere, and I would have to go, within myself in order to find her. The five of us faded into the night as we reached the house. I woke up to a phone ringing and looked at my watch. It read 8:40am, so I knew it was Joy, the masseur making sure I was here for the appointment. I took a quick shower and went to the front of the house to wait for Joy. When she arrived, Peter helped carry her table to the back yard. Joy started with me, and as she worked, I realized this was the first outdoor massage I’d ever had. Between the skillful massage and hearing the birds chirping, I was in a state of complete bliss. There were moments I wished the massage would never end. When it did end, Joy walked away to go speak to Barry. I felt magnetized to the table. It took considerable effort for me to get up. When I got my watch and saw the time, I realized over two hours had passed. Time had disappeared within my state of nirvana. I walked over to Joy and asked how much I owed her. She said 500 Pesos but I gave her 700 for a job well done, and also for missing the appointment the day before. Barry asked if I would show Joy my pictures. I agreed and brought them out for her to see. Peter, Joy and I then talked about the spirit realm. Joy said she had experienced out-of-body episodes via meditation, going as far as outside of her house. Yet when she went to Peru to participate in an Ayahuasca ceremony, she watched a shaman manipulate light like a blanket. Once she partook of the potion, she flew to the center of the universe in an out-of-body experience. She saw spirits of three different heights during her flight. Although too sick and weak to move upon her return, she said she had been healed in too many ways to tell us. I had experienced the healing power of Iboga, and had told myself I no longer needed 72

to do psychedelics. Her story however, rekindled my interest. As we examined my pictures, Peter particularly liked an illustration of a blue spirit-man, a white light coming out of him, surrounded by the symbol of infinity, and took a picture of it so he could duplicate it in a tattoo when he returned home. I knew at this point that I had to get these pictures copy-righted and finish my book as soon as possible, feeling it would be a successful venture. Fifteen minutes or so into our conversation, Barry told me and Peter to get ready as we would be leaving soon. I shook hands with Joy and bid her farewell. I was able to get a couple of group pictures in before jumping into the back of Barry’s truck. This time there were cushions to soften the bumpy roads ahead. A new guy, Peter, and I sat in the back while Barry drove with Veronica at his side. Once we arrived where Peter would be staying for the next week, I was able to get a free ride back with one of Barry’s Iboga patients who live in Mexico city. Thanking Barry and Veronica for all they had done for me, and reassuring Barry my book would have nothing but positive things to say about my experience in Mexico, I packed myself into an SUV full of art work. Veronica gave me one last kiss on her fingers, blowing me her love from the other side of the vehicle. Then the driver rolled us down the dirt hill. I started talking with the man in the passenger seat, who had endured the Iboga treatment. He told me he did the Iboga to help stop his alcoholism and drunk driving. He felt better now, but was disappointed in the lack of visions while in the Iboga state. I told him I had seen many things and perhaps the reason he had not seen much was because Barry changes the amount of different psychoactive chemicals for drug dependent people versus those who are doing it for psycho-spiritual purposes. Alexi had told me there are about twelve different psychoactive chemicals in Iboga. As we got closer to Mexico City he started to tell me what we were passing as if he were a professional tour guide. Once we arrived at his house I helped him unload his car, then went inside where he introduced me to his family. Down in his office he gave me some maps of the city, showing me where I would be staying and the location of the National Museum of Anthropology. After driving me to my hotel, I tried to give him some money but he refused. I walked into hotel Casa de Los Amigos and spoke to the clerk, which was funny, as neither one of us spoke the same language. After several minutes we were able find my room where I dropped off my stuff. I noticed an American girl reading in a library across from my room. Upon speaking to her, I discovered she was part of the Justice of Economics Organization. After some small talk, I asked if she knew of any good places nearby to eat. She made some suggestions and I was on my way. As it was three o’clock in the afternoon and I had not yet eaten, getting a bite to eat was first on my agenda. I found the restaurant, ordered a chicken quesadilla and a lime juice although they messed up my order and I got lemonade instead. I had a bad feeling about drinking the water, but figured “What the hell?” Finishing my meal, I walked around the block, getting some land marks in my mind to help find my way back to the hotel before venturing further out. I searched for the Museum, and after about two hours of walking I finally thought I had made it, only to be told it was a university, not a museum. A man who spoke English overheard what I was looking for and guided me to a bus stop where, as I boarded the bus, he 73

told the driver where I wanted to go. Arriving at the museum, I walked quickly to the entrance, feeling that it might be near closing time. When I got my ticket and asked where the Mayan calendar was, a lady pointed on my brochure to the far end of the museum. Walking rapidly, I was able to see just about everything before they closed. By the time I left the museum, it had begun to rain. I arrived at the bus stop only to find the buses were jam packed with people, so I decided to walk back to the hotel. After what seemed like miles of aimless trekking, I miraculously found my small hotel. The only thing left for me to do in Mexico City was to get a taxi the next morning to go to the airport. In the middle of the night, the lemonade began to give me diarrhea. Lesson learned. While cruising in the back seat of the taxi the next morning, I looked at all the passing buildings, feeling empty and alone. At the same time, I was grateful for all that I had experienced in Mexico. The only hitch at the airport was the fact that I could not carry a souvenir on the plane that had an arrowhead on it, so I paid ten dollars to have it wrapped in plastic. I put it in my back pack and had them put my bag under the plane. While flying above the smog of Mexico City, I thought to myself how mysterious and magical the last week had been for me. It had been such a transformation. I had let go of my attachments to negative thoughts, while receiving the clarity of love. I felt complete. The major question that had been with me for six years had finally been answered: why is there suffering? Iboga showed me it is because we are a projection of our own consciousness, which is then projected into an unconscious void where we experience an overwhelming fear of what mysteries may lay beyond. My thoughts focused on many things as the plane flew over the clouds, revealing the setting sun, leaving me in a state of extreme thankfulness.

Chapter 11 Spice (JWH-018) - The 7 th Entheogen After my Iboga trip, I felt a million times more calm and relaxed: my mind was at peace. I started meditating on a more consistent basis and found an even deeper sense of peace. I was able to sense things before they happened. I went to see the movie Inception, which was about lucid dreaming, and with this new inspiration, I started to keep a dream journal. I also bought books on the subject, and purchased a Dream Mask, which supposedly alerts you when you enter REM sleep but did not work for me. After about three months, I began to lose focus with the meditation, as I no longer had the time to devote to it properly. About four months after the Iboga experience, I received a call from my friend Bob who, unknowingly, furthered my entheogenic experience. I told him I had not done any entheogens since my Iboga experience, and had no desire to do so. He responded by telling me 74

about a legal, synthetic marijuana called K2 or Spice, which I had never heard of. He was surprised, because he said it was all over the news. I mentioned it was funny he was telling me about this now, as I had been looking for an alternative to drinking in social situations. I wondered if they sold something like that at my local smoke shop, and he said he would buy some from me if I were successful in my search. After our conversation, I looked up everything I could find on the internet about K2 and Spice, but everything written about it was rather vague. I did, however, find information on the chemical used to make it, JWH-018. My local smoke shop said they had the Spice but not the K2 because, “It sucked.” I picked up three grams of Chill Spice, the Kronic Hypnotic type, and paid seventy-eight dollars, twice the amount one would pay to get it off the internet, but I wanted to have it that day. Immediately after leaving the store, I called my friend and told him I got the Spice and would be right over to let him try it. Once there, he opened it and took a sniff. He said it smelled like strawberry bubble gum. After packing his bowl to the brim, he lit up and took his first hit. Fifteen minutes later he was experiencing the best high he had ever known. He said that it was as good, if not better, than Kush (a potent strain of Cannabis) and was so excited, he called one of his friends to come over and try some. His friend arrived shortly after he made the call, and started by taking small cautious hits. After over an hour, they seemed normal, yet at the same time told me they were experiencing a really good high. My friend encouraged me to try some with them, but as I still had errands to do by car, I said I would wait until I got home. He demonstrated to me that his motor skills were unimpaired. Nevertheless, I still decided to hold off for later. I sold him half of my three grams and left. Once I got home, I smoked a bowl, and then went to relieve my bladder. As soon as I was done zipping my fly, I felt an encompassing warm pressure swallowing me into itself from behind. Warm vibrational pulses emanated from my quickening heartbeat, to my eyes. My eye lids closed like an automatic garage door, revealing a round molecule revolving in the dark space of my third eye, showing me the chemical structure of what I had just smoked. I could feel the energy of my spirit-self going beyond my physical form, I left the bathroom, eyes closed, and were still able to see the outlines of the house. I walked to the entryway which, within a minute, turned into an invisible whirlpool spinning me in one spot. My arms stretched out in front of me, while my fingers rode the waves of the passing air. My right hand was the leader, leaving the left to flow in the currents of the right. I wondered out loud as to what was going on. I certainly wasn’t expecting anything like this. I felt that I was not in control, and started to worry a bit as to what was going to happen next. I told myself to calm down, reassuring myself, that I was an experienced person in regards to the use of psychedelics, and that I would make it through the experience. After a few minutes of rapid spinning, I slowed down, opened my eyes, and saw a golden pattern of DNA trailing from my hands. The pace picked up again, and after a few seconds everything, including myself, turned into white light, encasing me in a state of bliss. I was everything and nothing at the same time. Eternity reigned. Then the light was sucked away from my awareness and my spinning body

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began to slow down. The year 2012 had hit me and I knew it, as the enlightenment was mine.3 As I came back to myself I saw that it was getting close to five o’clock and knew that I had to get to my room before everybody came home. With difficulty I pulled myself out of the vortex, stopped myself from spinning and staggered into my room. Closing my door and turning on the light, I started to spin again. I tried to slow myself down as I was bumping into things in my small cluttered room. I had to let go of my fear, realizing that in order to do that, I had to know that nothing was really there. As my speed increased, I no longer bumped into anything, everything became formless. After spinning for what seemed like ten minutes, I was surprised I didn’t feel dizzy or sick, but still knew I had to stop myself. Eventually I was able to anchor myself to my bed by placing my arms and head on it while standing. I still felt the etheric forces of the vortex pushing me like I was in a strong current of water. I looked at a small white speck on my blanket, and my vision was sucked into a void that led me to the center of the universe. Once there, I saw myself from about three feet above. As I closed in on myself, my body, along with my bed, warped as if I were looking at myself on a reflective metal ball. Piercing my fading head, I saw the universe and its center. I repeated this entire series of events several more times before I shut off my light to crawl onto my bed.

3 Look up 2012 Enigma by David Wilcock on YouTube.com for his belief of what might happen to us on Dec. 21st, 2012

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Instantly I felt the energy from my magnetic mattress pad hitting me like little cattle prods, the intensity of which faded as my third eye showed me my thoughts. The first was how each of these entheogenic chemicals is merely a symbol of a key to unlock the doors of illusion, leading to the Universal Consciousness. I envisioned this as a man unlocking a door with a key, this being repeated seven times, a door unlocked to open to another door, which opened to another, seven times. Each man and door was a different color, each representing one of the seven main chakra points. Each vision was smaller than the one preceding and they all ended at a ball of light. Arriving at our moment of enlightenment, we become the master key. I pictured this as one man holding all the Chakra colors within him. That vision then turned into a solid black form, while the empty space went from black to white in the shape of an upside-down pyramid with a missing cap stone. In its place radiated an orb of light. The black form then projected a blue male spirit out in front, turning around to the right, facing the black form. This blue spirit explained to me what I really was. All is one, and everything is a projection from one’s self. Next, a red female spirit separated from the original black form, turned to the left, and explained the same thing again. The two copies of myself then projected two more copies of a male and a female, and so on into infinity. It hit me, while I talk to other people, I’m actually just talking to myself. Does that imply that those of us who talk to other people are the truly crazy ones, not the ones who mumble to themselves in the streets? There is only the inner self. While these thoughts faded away, I began to feel the electricity in my body rise. I could feel voltage flowing through my veins, shooting out beyond my body. A vision of an electrical heart pumping out blue bolts of energy appeared in the center of my darkness. As the heart throbbed, electricity surged out into my veins, shooting out of me in a light blue blaze as it branched out like the roots of a tree. I saw that the heart had formed into the shape of a person. As the excess energy dissipated, the vision faded. Seconds later, an orb of light appeared, projecting a human-like blue wire frame. From the darkness came the image of a person, flattened out like a sheet of paper, which began to form itself over the wire frame. Just before the image had completely wrapped itself over the human-frame it vanished, leaving only the orb of light. The orb then shot out two shafts of illumination that spiraled clockwise in opposite directions. One shaft projected a blue male spirit, while the other was of a red female spirit: both were running, leaving their colors streaking out behind them. After a few laps around the orb, the projections by-passed the spirit forms to become actually human, leaving a gold streak in the darkness from their bodies. That’s all there really is, positive and negative electrons spinning around consciousness. The whole experience lasted for about two hours, leaving my mouth very dry. The intensity of the trip was obviously quite high. However, the higher the intensity the more I believe one learns. From that particular experience, I had been shown how I was projected, and how to go back to my true self. I felt as if there was nothing else for me to learn; that I knew all there was to know. Still, I knew that this was only true for the time being, until I could assimilate all of this knowledge, before concluding that there is something else for me to discover about myself. Which would lead me into the bottomless pit of the infinite mysteries of life. 77

(all of the pics for spice go here) Where Does Consciousness Come From? (Dream) My friend Mason once asked me, “Where does consciousness come from?” I thought for a moment, and then told him that I believe consciousness is everywhere. That it is a ball of energetic information projecting itself from within, of an infinite amount of possibilities instantaneously and forever. He replied that was only a description, that where it actually comes from is another story. I realized he was right and the longer I thought about it, the more elusive the answer seemed to be. He said he wished he knew where it came from, leaving me to feel he had been pondering that question for quite some time, and that the answer would somehow expose some deep, hidden pain for him. We also pondered as to how there could be a beginning without an end, as the universe goes on into infinity without an end. The simplest answer I can give is that consciousness, space and time just are. To explain it any further would lead one on an endless journey, which we are all on anyway, subconsciously or consciously trekking on a daily basis. The answer remains under lock and key, deep within us. Months later I dreamt of a spark of radiant light projecting out the spirit form of a brain. Starting with violet, the crown chakra color, then another brain of the next lower chakra color projected out towards me. This continued through all the chakra colors until it reached red, the last color. This image lingered for a moment longer in my third eye before vanishing. When I woke up I felt that I had been shown the way consciousness projects the illusion, but was unable to decipher the mysterious brilliance of its origins. (Consciousness Dream pic)

Funky Monkey-XXXX My friend found the right level of JWH-018 in what is called Funky Monkey-XXXX. He told me that it is one level lower, in his opinion of the Spice. We went to a smoke shop where I bought four grams of it for $24.99. As we headed back to his place he convinced me to try it at his house. As we took about four hits each, the gentle vibrations flowed up the sides of my neck pouring out over my head before reaching my eyes, giving them a quick shake. I finally found the gentle high I had been looking for as I don’t care much for drinking. I found simple things to be ridiculously funny on the Funky Monkey, whereas if I’d been drinking, things would not have been anywhere near as much fun. Bob wanted to play a computer game, so I watched him start one, and as it was loading, I told him the one thing I hate about video games is when they are loading. We both laughed as I said he could look at that in two ways. After some time, he gave me a shot at Call of Duty 4, and when I’m high, playing a shooting game doesn’t make any sense. I had no motivation for playing a killing game. (Perhaps that’s why the military and the police forces don’t want to enlist people who enjoy getting high. They suspect these people won’t have the right mentality for military service, as they know Cannabis users have, as a rule, no interest in hurting or killing others.) As we headed upstairs, my friend pointed out his cat and made sure I noticed it was licking it’s ass, which put me on all fours laughing for a good five minutes. As I 78

regained composure I told him I really had to get going. After two-and-a-half hours I felt that the first major leg was over and felt safe enough to drive to Wal-Mart. It was pouring when I arrived, so I ran in and realized I had a lot of energy. I filled my arms with stuff and proceeded to the check out. As I was waiting in line, I took a look around. All I could see were price signs on everything. I felt every time I buy something I’m taking points off my soul. The store lighting made me feel dead and mute. It wasn’t until I ran in the rain back to my car that I felt alive again. Creative thoughts swam around in my mind on the drive home. I realized the Funky Monkey loosens the screws of my rigid, conformed ways, and allowing me to say whatever I want and feel great about it. In total, the first two-and-half hours was the peak, leaving about another two-and-half hours of just feeling chilled. I found my alternative to alcohol. Note: This is now illegal as of November 2010.

Chapter 12 Queen Tetra (Cannabis or what it is commonly called Marijuana) Experiences for One Year There are three ways I have consumed Cannabis Sativa and each gives you a different type of high. The first way is smoking it with a pipe. I did not use this method as much because I soon found the Vaporizer and the candy to be my preferred way. With the pipe I found myself with less energy, because the antibodies in my body would be fighting off the carcinogens from the burnt Cannabis and the smoke was, harsher. When I smoked the used up Cannabis from the vaporizer, the burn was not as bad and I found it to be a less intense, but very enjoyable high. The high was mostly a head high. The Vaporizer gave me more energy, did not burn my throat while inhaling, and made my mind race with ideas. As for the candy, the high comes on slowly. I would not typically feel the effects until an hour and a half later. This type of high was evenly distributed throughout my body and was less of a head high. I found a small portion of candy to be useful for concentration. This section will be about my Queen Tetra experiences. Most of these experiences were recorded while I was high or what I like to call loaded; with bliss that is. The recipe for the candy given to me by a dear friend is at the end of this chapter. I am going to give you my experiences through bullets because over the course of seven months my notes got jumbled around and were not concise. Also, even in one session my thoughts would jump from one idea to the next and so I thought it would be better to present my thoughts in this manner. So here’s my mind on Cannabis: · The Queen has many mysteries to show you. · Fear is conquered through understanding. · You’ve got to let out all your hidden personalities to be free, to be green, and to be 79

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high. Then you let the trip take you into its infinity. You’ve got to get all your little spirits out to play with your body to be happy. You are going to let this spirit have a ride. It will give you a ticket for a try. It will walk you around until you say good bye. Turn on your power, and open up your mind. Then it will show you that you are divine. It’s all vibrations; so just get in them man. It’s a spiritual kata that you must use to defeat fear (dancing on the Cannabis while listening to music). Love and fear are constantly chasing each other’s tails. Tato Tomato tatata; I will be smokin that shit tomorrow. A bird can eat a whole tree in one bite. That’s why it can fly. For if you can figure out how to do the impossible you will soar without a doubt. My drill instructor was my fear. My heart is my love. My soul is who I am. My consciousness is who we are. We play this game of cat and mouse, not knowing what it’s all about. I could tell you what it is all about, but you would not believe me without a doubt. So how about forgetting what you’ve been taught and find out for yourself what you’ve been without. The Queen lets the subconscious on out to play for a while. As time goes on there are more possibilities. It’s my reality. So I’m going to be pulsing my shockwave of love to the world. I paint my life with my eyes. Mystical smoke, what now do you have to tell me about the world beyond my mind. (Pic of “I’m the pyramid”) The desire to live forever occupied my mind for a while until I thought; death is scary, but infinity is downright terrifying. Besides, why such an attachment to an illusion anyway? I am an alien saving Earth with my higher dimensionality. The trip was beyond my rationality, but it’s the only way for all of us to find some sanity. You are aware of your download. Building illuminations and enjoying your imagination. (Pic of “Flower of Life”) Watching Avatar while loaded (high): Tree of Souls equals psychedelics and outsiders are forbidden to par-take. The character Norm equals normal and Grace equals gentle. In the beginning of the movie Jake, is covered by little white flower life forms; when this happens he is illuminated and has one hand facing up and one facing down; symbolizing what’s above, is also below. Listen to the background music when Jake first meets the mother shaman; the music sounds like some occult chant. Watch the deleted scene called Dreamhunt which show Jake’s real challenge to becoming part of the tribe. It reminded me of what a DMT or Ayahuasca trip looks like. Note:The Queen shows you the deeper meaning in things you see. Being Loaded with Queen Tetra is like putting on X-ray glasses to view propaganda. You can see how phony it is and that’s why corporations don’t like it. (Note: even 80

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when not doing Queen my creativity is way up and I more easily see the ridiculousness of mainstream propaganda) We are all a dream of the Universal Consciousness. The movie “Walk Hard the Dewey Cox Story” is so deep that I can’t see the end. This movie is so sophisticated that I applaud the people who did it. It’s about so many things such as secret societies, aliens, spirituality, psychedelics, drugs and much more. I could analyze this movie for years. The All Seeing Eye is not a symbol of spying or Big Brother but perhaps the all-seeing 3rd eye (Pineal Gland) that sees the spirit realm. And perhaps the Illuminati are a psychedelic society. The universe is a flower, death is a walk in the park, and life is a beautiful dream. (Pic of “The Universal Flower”) My mind imprisons me, so I must go beyond it to be free of it. Death keeps things in a true perspective. Queen Tetra takes off our emotional restraints. Darkness is trying to swallow me. Time expands like ripples in a pond. Psychedelics crack open your consciousness, revealing the very seed of what you are; light. Walking through crowds of dimensional seekers, I search for illegal computer programs that can hack through my main frame and connect me to the source of consciousness. Sweating with defeat, I am drawn to look up at a telephone pole directly beneath the sun revealing a message in my mind. That God is energy and energy is everything. (Pic of this goes here) Walking to the show a bug hits my forehead, feeling its residual energy going through my mind. The smoke cloud floats me down to the ramp of the Phish UFO. The band intelligently plays the music of the universe for us, the high aliens. As the music intensifies an opened portal is transporting me to the center of a colorful bliss. After the concert an encompassing sound of hissing tanks, popping balloons and laughter echoed all through the parking lot as nitrous oxide gas turned hippies into laughing crack heads for $7 dollars a balloon. As the gas spun my hearing perception in circles my laughter increased exponentially. Lasting as long as a roller coaster ride. Twenty one dollars later became the time to go. I had eaten some Queen Tetra Candy a few hours earlier; now I was smoking some Queen through my vaporizer. After smoking, I began to flow with the music of the solitary night. My arms matched the waves of sound while my body rocked back and forth on the sea of bliss. Once the waves calmed, I turned off my music and lights leaving one candle lit at the far end of my room. I laid on my bed and before I knew it I began to talk to my hands, and soon realized that they were in control by two serpent spirits. When I asked how it was they had come to me, I was told that when both entities look for each other’s vibrations the connection takes place. After much talking, the true intentions of these two spirits came to light. They offered me fame and 81

fortune, just as long as I sell my soul to the Devil. They told me all I had to do was fly through the tunnel poster above me. I was tempted but scared. After much more talking I said “No, I’m going to the light.” Now looking at the flickering candle my spirit flew to a fractaling light. I was downloaded into the light: I had won the fight for my soul. My head, throat and chest became energized, vibrating with an explosion of excited particles. I saw myself as a yellow glowing spirit having an even brighter yellow light shooting out of my mouth. Then I floated away with my soul mate through the stars. (2pic: Accepted and Rescue goes here) While grouping up with other spirits, we flew to a planet that faded to blackness at its center, where laid a small yet bright light. With the use of our consciousness, we are going to rescue its consciousness, for this planet is Earth. Now I know why I’m here: I’m here for bliss, I am in the bliss, and I am the bliss. Note: Earlier in the day I saw a YouTube video called “1 of 4 Dark Stars (Illuminati in Hollywood)” which dealt with famous rock stars who said they were possessed by spirits and spoke of selling their soul to Satan. This is why I think the Queen Tetra took me into this experience. · While listening/watching a YouTube video called 1200 Mircograms-Marijuana, this is what I wrote down. The infinite creates you; that’s why you must focus on your center to see what you truly are: a star of pure consciousness radiating light forever and ever. Now get back on your journey and see where this is taking us. I bet we will be finding love, for that’s all that truly matters. So go out with your love and see how it feels. Next YouTube video playing is 1200 Mircograms-ecstasy. Kaleidoscope your mind and see how far you can go into the light. It’s a hallucination of thoughts that transforms you into something else, something else that is more than light. So send out that peace and love with me until you can’t anymore; that will never be. Now watching 1200 Mircrograms-Salvia Divinorum. My mind is connected to everything I see. Now watching Robert Miles-Children (Dream Version) on Youtube. How are you? Thanks for showing me who I really am. Thank you, thank you, tha, tha, thank you and yes you want control but first you must learn to see beyond what you can imagine. Well I can imagine a lot. Well start with that. I can imagine light all around me. You can’t see the sun but you can hear the thunder. So go out and make some noise and let them hear what we are all about. It’s wildly long what I have to talk about; listen to my heart pound. It’s so wonderful how it beats; on and on forever. When you wake up you will ascend up to their realm. You got to loosen your bolts in your mind to be free. So digitize with me, so we can be one, one for all. Exploding into a sun that I am. That’s all I can tell you for now. You’re on your own from here. Can you hear me to this beat? I’m sure you can if you open your ears. Note: I could feel the thoughts being put in by the unseen spirits while writing all of this. Later a friend told me that it’s called spirit writing. · I sensed a demonic spirit was trying to enter my body from behind, so I twisted around on my bed for many minutes in one direction, switching directions as I continued to flee from this unseen spirit. After getting tired, I realized the only way I was going to 82

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defeat this demon was to consume it with my Love. So I stopped turning around and laid on my back, then imagined my radiant light of love dissolving my attacker. After a while my 6th sense told me I was now safe. (Pic “The Demon Attack”) After the Queen vapor touched every cell in me, I could feel my energy vortex flowing into my chest and out my back. The stars are so vast and beautiful; they make you feel insignificant and alone. And yet they are you. So you must go beyond their vastness to see who you really are. The galaxy is like a record player and every time our solar system aligns with the center we get played out, producing a copy of ourselves into the infinite. You must let all aspects of yourself be accepted in order to be in love; that is humanity. Realize what you are, a light of love; it’s magical. It shows what we can hold: a beautiful model of light, suspended in the infinite black void, as we fractal out farther into other realms. (Pic “Fractal Universe”) To travel easily you must have no attachments, not even to your own mind. The crazier the idea, the more value it has. I’m stuffing my face with expanding consciousness, exploring my minds realms, seeing what it has to offer. It would be awesome to be a vaporizer sales man smoking Queen on every sale. Nature fluctuates beautifully. Write everything into existence with your magic symbols; words. You can see and feel someone else’s perspective while high. Watch 2001 Space Odyssey while being high. Expand your awareness to become a planet. Expand your consciousness to planetary proportions and become a Sun. My body is my temple and my consciousness is my light. (Pic “I’m the Pyramid”) Salvia-Weed #1- Is the process when you smoke Cannabis first, then after ten to fifteen minutes of being high you smoke Salvia Divinorum. In this case I did 20x of Salvia. I asked to be un-plugged from the Matrix. I saw and felt spirits uncoiling my whole body starting from the top of my body working their way down to my feet. I felt energy being released from the base of my spine flowing up and through my neck into my head, while at times the energy tickled my ear drums making them ring. Several minutes later I fell asleep. It was late at night. Salvia-Weed #2 - I saw a white light projecting tentacles of different people showing me that I can become anyone I want. (Pic “you can be anyone you want”) You must collapse in on yourself to dissolve the illusion. Your inner light can fade the illusion away. We are light waves riding on the currents of the Void. Those that don’t see time are less delusional. Imagine squeezing yourself to a pea size right to the center of your being. Then expand or explode infinitely away from yourself. Feel your energy moving through your body. It’s only when you go out of your mind that you see all. We have an infinite void to travel through with no destination in sight. 83

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I like downloading trips. The world vibrates us. Nature can show those that are daring enough the beauty of the next dimension. I want an infinite perspective. Mind expansion fuels creativity. I’m eating the light. I will train my mind to take me anywhere. Let’s zoom off to another realm, flying through enlightenment. The movie the Matrix is a psychedelic movie. And it will take an electrical Magnetic Pulse of Love to stop the machine. You can’t be in contact with anything you aren’t vibrating to. Smoking with a lighter pops your ears. It has its special qualities. I have discovered that the used up Queen from the vaporizer is still good. But it is not as intense. We start off as an explosion of light that shapes us into vibrations of color that rides the dark void. Flying through a lucid dream on and on forever, going into higher dimensions of love (because it’s never ending); trying to figure out who we are. I would like to have a radio show where the person doing the show is high and only takes high people as callers and talk about Cannabis or psychedelics in general. And the callers have to be high as well. Preferably only those that have a medical marijuana card so that the police don’t bust the illegal users. My garden of Eden is a nice warm day hanging outside with a hot naked chick. In my garden I would be mainly growing Cannabis with some Salvia Divinorum and shrooms on the side. And I would be high as a bird and as happy as a clown. That would be my Garden of Eden. I’ll save the world through my intentions. By pulsing my love vibrations throughout the world. Queen Tetra is a Space ship that sends your tiny perspective into the beyond, making you realize what truly matters in life. Enlightenment does not come all at once. It’s a gradual process. It’s natural to want to give your friend a toke. It’s like saying: “Hey! Do you want to have fun?” Walking with a crowd to a bright light. Listening to my life’s song. Saying good bye to those I love as I venture into that great beyond. It takes all the light for us to be here. Therefore, we are at the center of the stage. If we shine all of our light on love then we will be able to see all, creating something truly beautiful. Do Ayahuasca and fly to the center of the universe and penetrate the universal consciousness. Once there, pulse out my love vibrations to the whole universe, waiting to receive their love vibrations, for everything you do is returned to you tenfold. Once I absorb all the universe’s love, I will fly back to the center of the Earth’s consciousness and explode that love energy to the whole planet, effectively raising the Earth’s frequencies. 84

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I figure things out faster through my use of Love. (Pic “Love to the World”) You must first serve your purpose before you can be free. (I did Queen Tetra through a vaporizer, two hours later I ate my ecstasy pill, 3 hours after that I took about 4 hits of acid) (picture “I’m chasing the Light, but I am the Light”- came up with this on the Queen alone). Euphoric vibrations took me to the next level. I was taught by my LSD shaman to live within the moment. That there are a lot of things I can show people through my book but not everything. Euphoric feelings are just one of them. He also showed me how the power of focusing my attention in the air can condense the reality around us and put it into a liquid blob at the tip of my fingertips. While looking at him talking, I saw light circuits in his face lighting up his black eyes. (pic of LSD Shaman) Taking moments here and there to close my eyes and see where my third eye is looking. I saw the grey alien type creature but they were white skinned and had red eyes instead of black. They are looking at me; I am light. Wow! That was cool; back in the party and laughing with bliss. Time is gone and now I see with my eyes closed, a triangle upside down with each corner being a primary color of spirits all waving their arms towards the central golden pyramid eye; the third eye. (pic “Eye of Enlightenment”) Twenty hours later and my mind still races with poetry. The universe is my home as I traverse this verse the way I want it to be. In all my lucid dreams, flying above all my wildest fantasies, continuing on into the infinity of my mind. Finding love, that is as bright as the sun. I like getting high and fantasizing about my dreams. I can rhyme on a dime and still be high. I like pot; I like it a lot! We go into parallel realities with every decision we make. Pulling my bones through my flesh, ripping my spirit out of my bones, my spirit walks into the beyond. Life is an infinite journey. I am a master of my mind, my universe, which is my home to explore. Airliners should have cameras facing the six directions so that the passengers can have a 360 degree view as they fly. I think we can out vibe the negative energies in this world with our intentions of love. I would like to have a small sample of all the entheogens that I’ve done encased in a clear glass ball to wear as a necklace. The universe is pretty dope. It’s amazing how small we are. But what’s even more incredible is how small the universe is. Every day is a dream, every night is a fantasy, every dawn is a new beginning, every sunset is a beauty, and every star is a possibility. Pot of Gold is Pot. Entheogens are vital to space travel. (Inspired by music video on Youtube.com: Oppokoppler-Spacetravel) We the people demand that we gas our Politian’s with Cannabis. Then they will stop 85

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fucking us over and start telling us the truth. And when we the people protest the tyrannical government and are faced with combating the police we will subdue them with our converted leaf blowers that pump out Cannabis smoke; leaving them unable to fight. You can’t fight when you are happy. I’m dope as a quital bug. Video tape yourself being high for one week doing all sorts of tasks. This will show the world what’s it like to be high and realize that there is no reason to keep Cannabis illegal. Your Love frequency rises as the Queen Tetra flows into your body taking you on an infinite journey to a place called Nirvana. Dialing, filing, text-filing. I’ve been consciousness exploring. I’m scared to realize how powerful I am. Love is not logical but it is more powerful. Toothless ruthless. The only power I need is Love. Wing chung I’m a ninja. That shit (pot) suites my fancy. 9 wigy wagets, 7 lucky stars if you make it, 6 grasshopers, 5 rabbit’s feet, 4 shrooms, 3 pot plants, 2 salvia plants, and one million dollar jack pot. Have a cartoon called Shaman, where you have a character for each entheogen. It will be a comedy but it will also teach people about spirituality. Playing the Kaossiloator while high is fucking awesome. I’m psychedlicatized. Sweet Nickels. Smoke Queen Tetra in public as much as possible to desensitize people to it (not in front of cops of course. I got this idea from a guy at a party). I’m sky high. Entheogens are psychic Steroids. You can manifest a whole building with that small Pineal Gland of yours, so that means the world is your stage. But you got to meditate first. If you can vibrate love, you can bring your whole negative system down. When you start telling the truth you will open up your heart. Hiding in lucid dreams from my fears of who I really am: conscious light. Expand your field of Love and dissolve the illusion of fear. You can access anything through love. When you completely love yourself, you will love everybody else. By healing myself, I help heal the world for that our consciousness are all connected influencing each other’s vibes. Pull whatever you want out of yourself with both hands plucking at your chest, eyes closed imagining your gifts. The Hive Mind of Spiritual Assistance: Imagine a honey comb of blue spirit helpers in 86

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each section ready to help you mold events to your liking. Not only that but when you ask that one spirit for help it gets hundreds of other spirits to help as well. Then you imagine them going into the future and caressing the illusion. Yet you still have to play a part, you can’t just sit on the side lines and expect the ball to score by itself but you will notice things getting a lot easier for you. So believe that you have hundreds of willing spirits that are there to assist you; it will make you feel like someone is on your side. My top ten things to do High: (1) Sex, (2)going to parties, (3) watching funny movies, (4) eating, (5) walking in the woods, (6) writing these creative ideas down, (7) taking a hot bath, (8) going to concerts, (9) working out, (10) looking at the stars. The point is to do things you already like to do, and then do them high: it will make the experience much better. I pulsed out the Love this morning, so I spent the rest of the day with Love. Pulse Love with me Now. I’m stomping Love into the Earth. As I fan out my chest and hands to the surrounding bliss of life, handing out my frequencies of thought. I’m Jam-in-the-Jam. You can’t stop the Jo when he is in the flow. Decode your body, heart and mind to Love. How delusional must I be to believe in such an illusion? (picture of “Heart Love”) (4 th Shroom trip/with Queen Tetra Candy) We need love to grow, and once we are grown, we hunt for it. In the end we realize that’s all there ever was and only then do we see the beauty of this world. So there’s nothing else to do but love. Go deep within yourself. Run down the bright tunnel to the base of your spine and activate your base chakra with love. Now run to your stomach chakra and activate it with love. Do this all the way to your crown chakra. Your body is now vibrating love, you are the light that flows over the Earth and through time. Love has no boundaries and neither do you. We are all angelic beings of love.☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺

Additional Queen Pictures: Psychedelic Pyramid Guide, Time Line Life, I Create My Life, Flower of Life, 3D Color Projection, Word Vibes, and Head Light. I don’t know if I can say enough about this wonderful plant: Cannabis Sativa. In appendix A, I list books and videos that show quite a bit. But what I can tell you from my personal experiences is that this plant has proven to be a wonderful resource for many different reasons. It has shown me that through my intentions I can experience quite a large range of different experiences. I have found it to be useful for creativity, relaxing, connecting with spirits, makes sex even better, makes working out easier, makes listening to music more enjoyable, has made me a better dancer, a better choice for a party situation (as opposed to alcohol) as there is no hangover, you don’t lose your motor skills, and it has made me really happy. On top of all of that, it has been proven to be a very healthy plant to consume. 87

I came to a realization as to why I did not enjoy my first few Queen Tetra experiences as much as I could have: it was because I believed the main stream media’s story about the results of smoking Cannabis. I believe that it would make me stupid, wanting only to eat and giggle uncontrollably. As you can see, this was not my case in the above Queen Tetra experiences because I had set my intentions to my own wishes. Majun Recipe (Cannabis Candy)

½ a cup of sieved pot 1 tsp of cinnamon plus nutmeg ½ to ¾ cup of sunflower seeds 4tb of chia seeds 1 cup granola 1-2 pinches of pepper 1 tsp baking powder 1 cup of honey ½ stick of butter Mix pot and butter well – allow to stand at least 3hrs – to overnight Cook honey to 250’ add all ingredients, except pot/butter mix and Baking soda. Heat to 300’, remove from heat. Stir in pot butter mix and baking soda. Cool completely.

Chapter 13 Moving Further Through the Mind The new synapsis connections are giving me new and intriguing thought patterns, which is taking my imagination further than anticipated. LSD Trip/With the Dragonflies Taking a small amount of LSD on a warm summer’s day, my thoughts soon flew with the dragonflies. I’m getting inside my mind, yet my mind is getting outside of me. It takes a lot of focus to see who I really am. Vibrating love helps. Take a trip inside a trip. Walking through the forest I realize I’m hunting for my mind. (pic “Path of Life”) I can feel my 88

destination as the energy goes through my stomach and out my back. Moving back and forth I am amazed how I can feel this. Continuing on my course, downloading info into my third eye, I realize there is no end to my journey. Yet time is brutally sharp so I must continue to work like a honey bee on my consciousness so I can evolve into what I truly am: light. My personal magnifying glass has shown me how far behind I am from my contemporaries. On the other hand I feel I know the meaning of life is to live it. How many others know that? Rice for One Week For one week I ate nothing but rice with lemon juice and basil leaves to help detoxify my Pineal Gland. On the last day I ate nothing, and drank a lot of water. I sat outside all day doing nothing but playing with my thoughts. I had boiled myself right down to my true essence of pure consciousness. It really is just a spark sitting in the vast void of blackness. How humbling. The slow moments of the day gave me a chance to think about what I really wanted in life and how to get it. As night approached, my spot changed to see the rising moon. As the first spark of light came through the trees, I prepared my mind to blast off into the center of the galaxy with my wing man sitting behind me. My fuel was a bad mixture, leaving me motionless, yet the moon still sent chills down my spine. The moon showed me the power a moment can have. Despite the fact I did not reach my intended destination, I had learned a lot on this journey. One of the last things I learned was that it’s not all about me. My wise friend agreed.

Queen Tetra and DMT/ “All Seeing” The All Seeing Eye emits purple fractaling molecular codes at me, spiraling out and away as I’m called. What is the word? The word is wonder. I can’t understand it. It’s too vast for me, but I’m trying. We are trying to interface with you. Just give us a call at 1-800-DMT. And work that mind. Do entheogens. The Queen has taken the rest of the ride to a friend’s house where the idea of faces opening up the center revealing another face and another and another infinitely, sourcing from the light emanating out of the dark tunnel mouths. The wheel of fortune spun in my favor as the circle disk of different people was placed into one body reveling that we are all one. (pic of “All 1”) 15 th -17 th Time/DMT Hits at the Power Spot (Pic “Let out my Light”_“Becoming Formless” – “Dimensional Ship Spot” The first time I set my intentions on letting out my light, I saw red and yellow geometric shapes transforming into a beautiful star. On the next hit, I asked to become formless, and was telepathically told I had to go into the dark. As I was being told this, I saw a space of white light open up in front of me with a yellow/green geometric merkabah shape floating in the middle constantly transforming. It seemed to generate growth of a red light as it spiraled up into the darkness creating a rose. Coming straight down, a red snake slithered towards the center of this red rose. Before it reached the rose, the vision faded away with the wind. The last trip takes me inside a UFO made out of red light. I look around and notice six 89

red light silhouettes of people coming towards me telling me I must do Ayahuasca so we can have a longer conversation in the light. I know this tale is not finished until I do Ayahuasca. Ideas and Dreams I have noticed that even when I’m not using any entheogens my mind now works as if I’m still on them. My creative mind is well lubed and constantly coming up with ideas. Even my dreams look like some of the trips I’ve experienced. First I will show you my ideas; all of which are shown in picture. (pic “The Key Frequency” – “Universal Duality” (idea from reading one of the Carlos Castenada books) – “Growing” – “Word Block” – “ Merging Dualities” (idea from reading one of the Carlos Castenada books) – “Neuron Connection” (idea from reading one of the Carlos Castenada books)-“Fractal Choices” and the last idea came from listening to a shamanic drumming CD by (get who by), “A Helping Hand”. The next two images are from my dreams. (pic “My Higher Self” – “We are Clouds”) Chapter 14 The Jaguar Path: Yoga and Peruvian Shamanism My friend Archie got me interested in a course called the Jaguar Path which he had taken the previous year. He talked of the interesting tools he’d been taught to use. The one that caught my attention the most was called “Seeing.” For this tool, you shake a rattle while looking into someone’s left eye and Archie said the room had opened up into another dimension. Needless to say, upon hearing of this I wanted to learn more of what the course had to offer. After practicing with entheogens for the past three years and reading several books on shamanism, I was eager to delve deeper into its mysteries. After speaking with Ray Crist, the Jaguar Path instructor, and completing a short introductory session, I felt he could help me heal further. And this journey would be without the use of entheogens.

Jaguar Journeys by Ray H. Crist (CD) The audio CD takes you on a guided tour to find your power animal. Lying on my bed with the head phones on, I followed the instructions to look at my feet while walking, then to gradually look up. (The rest may vary to what the CD says, because imagination begins to take some control). As I raised my eyes, I saw a woman’s legs walking ahead of me. This woman led me to a field where I saw a deer that had been shot, bleeding, dying. I felt sorry and helpless to do anything for it. I soon realized this was the same deer I had found while walking in the woods as a teenager. It had a gunshot wound that entered the chest and came out its rear; taking a chunk of its tail. Once the deer sensed me standing over it, it stumbled away for ten or so yards away before collapsing. As I walked to it again, I looked for a rock or something I could kill it with in order to put it out of its misery. As I approached it again, it ran off into a thick bush that I 90

could not even low crawl through. I never saw it again. With the CD continuing to guide me, I now saw the deer standing upright on its rear legs, opening the brushes like a piece of paper that led to a dark space. Once I entered, a flood of light penetrated me, releasing my sadness for the deer. Inside this bright space I received two gifts: a black box and a round rock with rings on it. These were gifts from the deer in appreciation for the sympathy I had given it that day so many years ago. Leaving this space of light, I reentered the woods to find a spot where I could sleep. As I walked, I saw several deer hiding behind trees, looking at me. As I laid down under a big tree, I looked into the eyes of my deer of sorrow and felt it projecting its love to me. I knew then it was my power animal and had been protecting me ever since that day. Listening to the final CD instructions to stretch at the end, I finally released my sadness and felt free of the old hidden burden. Finding My Serpent Rock with Queen Tetra as My Ally I ran a scenario in my head as I was shoveling snow towards the bird house. That I, like Don Juan, must slip away from my keepers of love to get my serpent rock for the shaman class. After shoveling a path to the bird house, I ran away from the house so the keepers would not see where I went. I crawled under trees and ran over hills following the tracks of the wolf until they put me in the Serpent’s lair. From there I went to where I shot my fears. Looking now at the dark murky puddle of water I took my gloves off and dove to the water blindly searching for my Serpent rock. At first I thought I had one but it turned out to be only a stick. After a couple of minutes of fingering through the freezing, muddy water I pulled out my Serpent rock. It was ugly but I knew I had the right one, because I chose it by the power of the spirit, not by looks. I knew at that moment I had to run back over my same path as quickly as I could, without my keepers realizing I’d been gone. This turned out to be successful.

Chapter 15 Find Yourself and Save the Planet Several Shrooms/8 Hits of LSD/2 licks of MDMA/ Queen Tetra Vapor hits several hours later/“Love to the Universe; Love to the Earth” After taking a decent dose of shrooms, a strip of LSD that equaled about eight hits and two licks of MDMA, I was charged up for quite a journey. As I laid down in my dark room, I ran my intentions for this ride through my mind. I knew of an asteroid called YU55 that was scheduled to be flying too close for comfort on November 8 2011. So I strove to protect Earth through my love intentions, hopefully raising the vibrations of Earth, keeping her safe. While lying on my bed I took my spirit mind to the center of the universe, pulsing out my love vibrations to the whole universe, knowing everything we put out comes back many-fold. While floating in the center of the universe, I absorbed the universe’s love for several minutes until I knew I had all its love energy stored in my spirit before flying back to 91

the center of the Earth. Once there, I exploded my love energy out to the whole planet before returning to my bed. As my consciousness slowly returned to my body I felt energy lines wrapping around my legs. My ears started to perceive a humming noise that sounded like the inside of a UFO, although; I’ve never been in a material one before. Several minutes later, I faintly saw a couple of Greys, with one reptilian creature standing behind them. As I shifted my gaze from left to right, I noticed that there was a curtain of dark grey circles hiding these entities from my view. Only when I looked through this curtain at a certain angle could I see these shadowy figures. I felt like these entities were in control of this reality, manipulating our vibrations of thought. Receiving the access codes to the Universe, our meeting ended as I got up to download this information. I powered up YouTube.com and played the video called “Voyage Through Space and Galaxies” for the rest of the night. Watching the universe pulsing out frequencies of love, I finally appreciated its true beauty. When you send your love to the universe, you are shown the universe. Trying to decode all of its messages will take a lifetime. The universe has become my horizon, and that’s where I lost my mind in awe. It just keeps going and going. Awe Yeah. Hours later, words flowed out of my hands onto paper. Love is the best and most affordable energy out there, and that is all the energy I need. It’s really absurd to be writing about reality when, in fact, it does not exist. But I’ll humor myself tonight with this next thought. Despite all the wars, all the years, we are still stranded in our own little minds. Our mind needs to evolve, and soon, for this small planet is about to disappear for lack of love. Our civilization was just an ape’s thought. If we choose to go to the stars, we need to evolve beyond our unfounded fears and become enlightened with love. As I document these other realities, I see the truth. The funny thing is, I had so much to say while searching, and now that I’ve found it, I’m afraid to tell anybody about it. What if the dream disappeared? Every time I think I’ve figured it all out, reality reveals even more, showing its deeper mystery once more. I wish I could master this illusion. Would that too be an illusion? I guess I’ll sit back down and enjoy the show, while these melodies of thought pass through my mind in the nebula of hyperspace. I’m cold with purple limbs, knowing it’s time to smoke the Queen Tetra to revitalize my body. Within minutes I’m warm enough to continue into the morning sun. The infiltration came from within my mind on a dime of synchronicities sourced from a million possibilities. The universe was on my mind last night and I thought Love, Love, Love to the whole universe and the cool vibrations of love echoed back saying, “We know, we see you there, little star so far away, looking out your cold window.” I’ve made a consciousness shift into another dimension; one where I have saved the future Earth with my intentions and I still don’t know what the next second will bring. And that is just beautiful. It leaves me on shaken ground, but what is the ground? Why do I continue to bring up my illusions? To keep reaffirming to myself that I’m here? When I look around the inside of my head, all I hear are echoes. Twenty-four hours later, I finally went to bed listening to one of my eco-sync CD’s. I noticed the sound I had heard while looking at the aliens sounded like the humming noise on the CD. The eco-sync CD plays two slightly different tones in each ear to help balance 92

brainwaves. When I told my friend Al about this the next day he immediately thought that what I was hearing was not the sound of an inter-dimensional UFO but the sound of the universe. If he is right then the universe is quite possibly playing a balancing harmony from which we could all benefit. Chapter 16 Ayahuasca - The 8 th Entheogen It boggles my mind how Ayahuasca, a combination of two natural plants, is illegal because it contains a chemical known as DMT, which is produced naturally in our brains. This chemical is mysteriously magical in the fact that it can take our perceptions to a whole other dimension. So here I go into the beyond of thought with this sacred medicine. 1 st Time/ Ayahuasca/“I’m healed Ten Fold” There is no doubt in my mind that I had gotten the attention of the spirit realm on my last journey, as my life’s synchronicity scale started going off the chart. I knew I had to do this one last entheogen before I could finish my book, and I was not due to go to Peru to do Ayahuasca for another nine months. Then, out of the blue, I heard from an old high school friend I hadn’t seen in eleven years. He told me to prepare myself for an Ayahuasca ceremony, as he would come and perform the ritual with me at my home. For the next few days I began the special diet of not eating any meat, dairy and of course, no liquor or drugs. I picked Jay up, and on the way we talked continuously of a great many things. It was nice to talk to someone who has been on the same path as I, but for many more years. Jay told me there was a group of people in Hawaii dedicated to becoming spiritually advanced, and that Hawaii is the only other place other than Peru that grows Ayahuasca. He has been studying with a great shaman in the jungles of Hawaii for three years, learning how to do Ayahuasca ceremonies. Once at my house we set my room up for the ceremony. Jay had me cleanse my room with white sage smoke as he set up his mesa, after which he had me hang two feathers from my light fixture which hung in the center of my room. He told me this was to detect the subtle energies of spirits. Then it felt like Christmas, because he gave me an Ayahuasca vine (Banisterioopsis; MOA inhibitor). This was one of the plants Terence McKenna, who I consider to be one of the godfathers of psychedelic knowledge grew on his property. I then received the Ayahuasca leaf (Psychotria Virids; DMT), followed by a black winter hat which made so much sense to me later on, a blanket to sit on, and a signed book by Daniel Pinchbeck called “Breaking Open the Head.” He told me this gift was for what I was doing and he hoped it brought me a writer’s power. Jay then started to play a Ayahuasca music CD, telling me these were for me as well. Lastly, he handed me a beautiful small wooden box to hold my pipes in. To say the least, I was happily surprised by all of this. Jay assured me that if there was anyone from high school who could be a shaman, it was me. He remembered me running track in high school, pushing past my own mental 93

barriers and breaking the school record for a two mile run. Once I had broken the first record I kept breaking my own records and then there was no stopping me. He expressed how happy he was to be doing this for me, and all I could do in the face of such complements was try and hold back my ego, and thank him for making me feel so good about myself. I told him I always liked him as a friend in high school, but had thought he was a bit crazy. Once he told me his life story, it not only made sense but made me realize he was one of the only sane ones out there and spiritually far ahead of the rest of us. Now that I understand him, I consider him to be one of my best friends. When we were finished setting up, puke buckets on standby, Jay opened up the first bottle of Ayahuasca medicine, which suddenly exploded all over the room. We managed to save most of it and used rags to soak up the rest, draining what we could into another container. I told him the spirit had really wanted out, and we have now offered some of the brew to the other spirits. He smiled, liking my optimism. As we got ready to take our first shot we both prayed silently to ourselves. My intent was to pulse peace and love to the whole world. Once down the hatch, I was surprised how bland it tasted. When I tried making my own brew it tasted pretty bad, and I asked him what he did to make it so much better. He admitted he had added nutmeg and cinnamon to it. After another shot or two and some spiritual talk, he took me into the other room where we had set up his massage table earlier. As I laid on the table he started what I can only describe as acupuncture with fingers. I felt like he was hacking into my body’s mainframe, balancing the energetic equation, effectively healing my body. At one point I laughed as he went over the side of my ribs, and asked me how it felt to be back in my body. I thought, “Oh shit,-I was not in my body before?” Putting his hand over my stomach he started to make demonic noises and had to leave for a moment to spit out the demonic energy trapped in me. When he came back to finish his work, I could not stop feeling like he was an old friend from the stars of advanced spiritual beings. Everything he did seemed to have such a purpose and intelligence behind it. When he was done he went back into my room to give me time to demagnetize my extremely comfortable body off the table. Walking back into my room I told him my thoughts, talking for a bit about several subjects before entering the next level of the ceremony. We took several hits of DMT that we placed on top of Psychotria virids (Ayahuasca leaves). I felt like he was now pushing me past another bigger wall and once I jumped over it, I came to the realization of where I truly am in this life. That’s when I let out the biggest scream of unseen built up rage and pointed to the ground saying I’m right there, as if seeing myself in this life for the first time. The CD came to the mantra: “Om Namah Shivaya.” Jay made me try to sing it, but after I messed it up a few times, he wrote it down for me. We were able to synchronize our chanting, and although I had never used a mantra before, it made me feel great. He told me after the song that he has incorporated many things from many different religions into his healing practice. I no longer felt the same kind of resentment towards the mainstream religions and felt an interesting peace for them. I realized that even though they are not perfect, they do have their place for humanity’s spiritual upbringing. After a long trip to the bathroom and several more shots of Ayahuasca, the real test 94

had finally come. The Ayahuasca was weighing me down with the urge to vomit, but Jay coaxed me to stand up. As I slowly rose with the puke bucket in my arms, Jay kept telling me to stomp my feet on the floor and get grounded, and to stand on my two feet. Once I was up, he told me to stand up straight. When I had finally done all he instructed, I threw up as tears of relief ran down my face. He told me, “Good job, you’re doing great.” At that moment, I felt I could accomplish anything I wanted. Any walls I had built in my mind were no longer of brick, but of thin paper, easily torn through. At the same time I felt like I was being crammed with unseen knowledge, while yet another part of me felt like I was dying. Once I had disposed of my vomit, we discussed several philosophies and topics, among which was our relationship to Universal Consciousness. I said I would like to learn how to maintain my individual awareness when I die, to avoid the complete ego death discussed in the Carlos Castaneda books. They speak of the Eagle’s emanations devouring our consciousness. I told him my thoughts on why we are here in the first place; perhaps the Universal Consciousness seeks knowledge of itself through us. Jay felt that to lose oneself in the Universal Consciousness would be the greatest honor. I agreed, but I am still very attached to myself. As I went to the bathroom, Jay smelled popcorn my friends were making and asked if I could get him some. I was surprised by this request, as I thought it would not be a good thing to eat with a stomach full of Ayahuasca brew. He said “I make my own rules,” and added another rule: don’t follow other people’s rules if they are harmful to you or others. I told him I liked this concept of making your own personal rules, and decided to someday make a list of my own rules. As we talked about good books and movies, I told him how he reminded me of a movie I had recently seen called “Rainbow Bridge”. He suggested I watch The Missionary (1983 film), The Peaceful Warrior and to read the Celestine Prophecy trilogy. He told me a truly amazing story from high school. He went to a concert completely sober, and somehow opened a vortex to another dimension. Right after this occurred he was grabbed by the Hell’s Angels, and taken to a room where they beat him. During all this, he saw a reptilian spirit about an inch in size that sat an inch away, looking deeply into his right eye, while a doctor type spirit looked into his left eye. Jay said they had noticed him because of his ability to open a vortex into another dimension and wanted to suppress his abilities of doing so. If you watch http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUuo6aVXLko; which is REPTILIAN AGENDA ON TV PART 16 THE ABYSS typed out. This is just a sliver of the wild information out there on the reptilian phenomena. The more I’ve looked into it and from my own personal experiences with entheogens, I fear there may be some truth to this subject. I know it sounds so crazy that most people will not believe that such a possibility exists. Nevertheless, it’s a subject some people do believe in and should be investigated more thoroughly. David Icke is one such person who has investigated the subject matter and is a good source for this information. The conclusion we came to is that the reptilians are a higher dimensional entity that feeds off our fear energy and are the true rulers of the illusion we live in. Being in a state of fear imprisons us, and Love is the only real key to freedom. 95

Jay came to the conclusion that weirdness has no boundaries. I agreed, and it reminded me of one of the parts in the Carlos Castaneda books when Don Juan was teaching Carlos how he kept himself sane by being unpredictable. Carlos was not unpredictable and therefore made Don Juan go insane with boredom. All of a sudden Jay handed me his Hawaiian hoody to have, saying he just felt the spirit moved him to do so. I refused at first, but then accepted his generous offer and put it on. I told him I really liked it and realized how he had healed me like no other. Although I’ve learned a lot over the years and have mentally changed dramatically for the better, I was still holding on to my old self through the clothes I wore. I had never realized how important clothes are to the way we think about ourselves. If I were to move farther down my path of shamanism, I had to change my wardrobe. Jay did what no entheogen could do. He changed my environment. I could not thank him enough for this redirection. I told him I was slightly disappointed that I had not experienced any visions while on the Ayahuasca, but nevertheless felt like my mind was straightened out. His response was that there are several levels to Ayahuasca, and I had received a lower one; if I had started on a higher level I would never want to do it again. I respected his reasons and was still impressed at how much more I felt healed. When the night got late I set him up with a spot on my floor to sleep and we talked a bit longer about the spirit world, the real world, and of course women. Eventually the darkness dimmed our awareness to a deep sleep. A couple of days later we were hanging out on a mountain talking about the world’s affairs and how to heal them. Jay felt one good way to do this was to have a holiday where everyone meditates on peace and love for a day. We then discovered that we both knew about the YU55 asteroid coming close to Earth and both of us unknowing of each other’s activities set our intentions of peace and love towards the planet to protect it. We concluded that the best way to heal the world was through our mind’s focused intent of peace and love. That’s when I realized Jay’s mission in life, to heal the wounds in people’s minds through his many tools. I compared him to Mother Teresa with a shamanic touch. His true colors engulfed my mind and I realized that if he could, he would absorb all the suffering in the world and want nothing in return. I know I’m truly blessed to have him as a friend and wish him luck on his monumental journey. I can’t thank him enough for all he did for me. 2 nd Time/Ayahuasca/“I’m Freeded” A couple of days after Jay left for his next adventure, he gave me a call to tell me he had left some Ayahuasca at his friend’s house. He said I could have it, and that it was several levels more potent than what I had done before. The day had come for me to be shown a truth that truly boggled my mind. While preparing myself for this journey, I had written down several things I wanted to accomplish, but mainly I was looking for the end of this entheogenic journey of mine. Six-thirty at night the first shot went down, six-fifty, second shot down, and seven-thirty, third shot down. Now my body started to twist about as the demons came out. I saw that our enemies need our love, while those who suffer need to stop feeling sorry for 96

themselves, effectively releasing themselves from their own created misery. When we can finally relax with those we love, we will understand what we truly are. I am healed, I am love, I am all, I am, I. The more willing you are to suffer, the more desire you have to learn. The fourth shot at eight-thirty at night, telling me I have a whole world of possibilities. I’m done journeying to other realms because I’m missing out on this one. Finally I’ve realized the whole point of my entheogenic travels; to find what’s on the other side. For me it is conscious love. Fifth shot at nine-thirty. I’m a healed spirit ready to walk out of the hospital door and enjoy life’s wonderful mysteries. I can breathe again. Appreciation for my wonderful family comes into fruition. It’s amazing how much one can learn and still know nothing. Diarrhea in the bathroom has now commenced. I’ve been looking for a show when all I needed was a deeper understanding of life. Are you ready to graduate? Puking will be your spiritual diploma. Sixth shot at ten o’clock brought my diploma out. Written in the brown sludge it read “Love is the secret to freeing yourself. Let go of your old self and transform into your greatest potential.” I started to see a twirl of colors penetrate the veil of darkness, and my heart beat pulsed its meaning, revealing my true self as a conscious, energetic ball of light with flaring rainbow tentacles. Terror struck me out of nowhere as if I had never seen myself before or realized that I am not my body. I instantly wanted to kill myself and could not understand why. The only answer I could come up with was that my true self had just realized it was sleeping and that I was only an illusion trapped in a mirror, and that the only way to wake up was to get rid of this illusionary body. My fear increased as I took deep breaths to calm myself down. I knew fear was keeping me in this prison and distracted me. I thought until a colorful snake spirit starting to fly around my energetic ball. Thoughts rushed in from the unknown as I was told this serpent spirit feeds off my fear by pulsing a frequency that traps my awareness in this reality. The only way to free myself was to be in a constant state of love. I realized what had led me to this moment of truth was my constant use of Cannabis for the last two months and intentionally pulsing my love frequency to everyone. After several minutes of this I fought off the urge to kill myself and was desperately eager to fully participate in this realm again. The desire to do entheogens and even Cannabis was sucked away into the darkness behind my closed eyes. I was missing out on this realm and badly wanted to change my life. I wanted to get rid of my entheogenic paintings in my room and focus on getting a regular life with the typical family, house with the white picket fence and a dog to boot. A strange part of this was that my fear of death had returned, just as present as it had been prior to my entheogenic quest. During my journeys I seemed to have temporarily lost that fear. Now, I feel like I have come full circle and am back at eating my own tail. Except this time I taste different and am curious to start on a new path. 46 th Time/Yellow Zone Salvia/ “Bob are You Out There?” Finding out from my friend Kim that her father had passed away the night before was a heartbreaking moment and at the same time a blessing. I say blessing because his last few 97

weeks of being ninety-six years old had been tough on him. There were many occasions when his family said he was reliving his past during these last weeks of his life. I have heard quite a few stories where a person that is dying makes contact with the deceased loved ones. I read his autobiography several years ago and was amazed at the adventures and near escapes from death he had experienced while in the Navy. My family had rented a house from him when I was young. That’s when he and I became friends while sharing our passion in maintaining the beautiful landscape. I offered to contact him through my use of Salvia. She asked me to tell him she loves him and considered it to have been an honor to be there when he died. The phone call ended with tears and promises. A couple of hours after getting off the phone with Kim, I prepared myself mentally and purified my room with white sage smoke to call in the spirit of her father. The Salvia took me deep, revealing a Swastika symbol swirling counter-clockwise with each arm containing a group of yellow human spirits walking on a sunny dirt road. I heard a female voice say, “We have to get going.” Unsatisfied with this response, I took another hit. This time I rolled myself up in my blanket while lying on my back, bed sheets over my face, looking into moving shadows of death. I felt like I had tapped into Bob’s head and instantly knew his spirit was still attached to his body and in a state of confusion. Coming back into my head I was left with the residual feelings of what Bob was quite possibly going through; kind of confused and a bit sad at the same time. I went to discuss this with Al to see what he thought of this. He told me the spirit takes about three days to leave the body but it varies depending upon the individual. This answer reminded me of some Kirlian photography videos I have seen before, showing that when a portion of a leaf is torn off, the spiritual essence remains for a bit longer. I then told Bob’s story to my friend Natalie, and she thought the sunny road was where Bob will be walking as a ghost until his wife passes on as well. Then they will both hold hands walking into the divine light. I agreed to this thought in a deep silence as the sun’s rays shone into my eyes. 47 th Time/Yellow Zone Salvia/ “Hold On”-Bob Five days later I decided to try again to make contact with Bob. This time I had the feeling he had detached from his body. Three nights ago I woke up at three in the morning with a strong feeling that he wanted to talk to me. I voiced my desire to the spirit realm to talk to Bob. Salvia gave me the senses to hear Bob say, “You want to talk with me? I’m dead!” His voice sounded young but a bit choppy as it echoed off my head. A line of purple human spirits walked around my eyes while the faint image of a skull came in front of them. I told Bob his family loves him and Kim felt honored to have been there when he died. He responded back with, “If they had anything to tell me while I was alive they should have said it then, but I already know how they felt about me.” I asked him if there was anything he had to say to his family after being alive for the past ninety-six years. The voice was strong and sure now when he said “Hold on to every heartbeat, for life in this reality is a very precious thing.” My sense of gratitude swelled 98

dramatically as I opened my eyes, looking at the dark walls in my room. Looking back at my experiences with contacting the deceased father for another friend, I have come to realize that when you die you don’t go to the spirit realm without processing. You are reborn into the spirit realm. But before I try to figure out anything else in this mysterious life I’m going to start living my life more fully to honor the best quote of the century. “Hold On…” Dream of Bob’s Full Transformation When the dream started, I was deep in my woods at night trying to contact spirits. My ears started to ring, changing the woods to a place infused with a pinkish white light with three forms in it: a ball of light and two pyramid geometric shapes to the right of that. Bob’s voice boomed from the ball of light and I could clearly hear him tell me he was very happy and rather surprised to be where he was now. This startled me so much that it woke me up, for I have never had a dream that I could hear so well. The image of this dream was so beautiful that I couldn’t stop thinking about it for several days. We are truly amazing spirits.

3 rd Time/Ayahuasca/three spoonful’s/“The Power from Everything” My intention with this journey was to be with my soul mate. One way I thought I could accomplish this was to open up my luminous field of love. So after three spoonful’s of Ayahuasca and an hour and a half of waiting, the vision came as a swirling cone of light descending over me. In the center of this cone a sphere of light projected many faces, letting me know that each face I see is a different emotion of mine. I thought how all possibilities are behind me, and what’s in front of me are my current beliefs. Pondering this for a few moments, I wondered how I could bring what I wanted from the universal consciousness, into my current beliefs. The answer I received was to write everything I wanted as if I already had it, every day, and two times a day, for at least thirty days. My hands are magnets for everything I want. I can be whatever I want to be. I can feel the power within me unlike any other time in my life and it’s a cool feeling. 4 th Time/Ayahuasca/four spoonful’s/ “I’m the 1%” Now that I’ve been writing down what I want for the last four weeks, at least two times a day, I have manifested the best way to bring all my dreams to life. My shaman teacher told me he goes into the spirit realm to insert his wishes where the walls of manifestation are more pliable. So I wrote down what I wanted to accomplish with this journey. (1) To attract my soul mate. (2) Write my book and find it on the New York Times Best Seller List. (3) Have Awesome Lucid Dreams every night. (4) And finally, attract all the health, power, freedom and riches I want. 99

As I ate each spoon-full I would think of one of my wishes, imagining how sweet it’s going to be living my dreams. The first thought that came to me about 20 minutes after eating the Ayahuasca was that I needed to cut any cords still connected to my negative experiences in Haiti; to heal more. Moments later the realization came to me why the 1% is so rich. They know they are dreaming. All I have to do to be rich as well is rub my fingers together, feeling the money in my hand and seeing it in my mind. After an hour and a half I had to go to the bathroom. The next cycle of visions began to come as the medicine pulled the toxins from me in both directions. Seeing geometric shaped faces unlocking geometric doors leading me into the factory of creation. There is so much to see in life, I wondered how it can all be. Where do you go to wake up? Nowhere because it’s all here. I closed the spirit door on my challenging opponent, leaving him powerless against my knowledge. I am the 1%, because I have realized I’m dreaming. As this thought floated in my mind, I saw two dark blue triangles morphing into one another, opening a portal into an endless power line of knowledge streaming directly into my mind. Attracting my soul mate so that we will grow old together and transform into butterflies, flying to our heart’s desire. I am the ‘I am’. I’m a Trillionaire and I’m healthy because I’m so frickin’ happy.

I cough thunder I beam the sun I cry the rain I blow the wind I tremble the Earth I freeze the night All because I’m alive and feel the love. I am intense because I’ve got the Force to unlock my mind. So it turns out I am now the queen bee, because I can see how it can all be. I’m going to turn the 1% of the financially wealthy into 100% spiritually wealthy with what I’ve got to say here; empowering the workers with all the possibilities awaiting them once they open up their minds. Change is constant in life, but so is Love. After four hours of preparing my future in the higher dimensions, I felt an urge to go for a walk in the woods. Getting out of bed I saw my face in the mirror and noticed something different about it. It was the face of success. I looked like I had just inherited all my fantasies. 100

As I tried to sneak out of my house, I sounded the dog alarm and woke up my familiar (animal spirit guide). I leashed him up and we drifted out into the midnight. The warm air along with my dilated eyes made the stars twinkle twice as brightly. As I headed deep into the dark woods, my familiar became my Seeing Eye dog as he effortlessly led me through our narrow, uneven path. I took a short break on the path and, looking up at the beautiful sky I realized I had been walking the same path for many years and that it no longer serves me. I’m ready to go on a new one where I hold hands with my beloved. Moving deeper into the woods I came to a field where I saw a dark circular patch on the ground. I walked to the center of it and stood there watching the world vibrate love, while an owl, a plane and the hum of the distant city rang in my ears. A smile streaked across my face in the twinkling of an eye as I realized there is a tremendous amount of Love all around me. Moments later I reached my power spot and received my final realization, that even though I had an ego death on the shrooms three years ago, the Ayahuasca built me the strongest ego through what it had taught me. Luckily for me, the most beautiful spirit I’ve ever seen, humbles me with just a quick glance at her. She is the Yin to my Yang. Cutting out of my power spot to the road of a new beginning, I walked toward the light at the horizon knowing I’m finished with this path and ready to walk side by side with my soul mate to a life full of wonderful journeys. My familiar stopped me just before I walked off the road, so I took this as a sign to look around. Looking to my left I saw a white tree and a dark tree to my right. I knew this was my final test. I had to choose the right one to pass. So I looked at both and contemplated on which one to choose. After a few moments I decided to choose both the pillar of light and the pillar of dark as I realized they both have their role in life, and only then was I allowed to pass them. Walking through the last field, I took one more look up at the stars and said thank you, before disappearing into my loving home. 5 th Time/Ayahuasca/five spoonful’s/ “I’m Reborn” My initial intentions for this last and final trip of mine was to go into the spirit realm and pulse peace and love to those who suppress the free energy technology, cures to all diseases and any other information that can free us from this suppressed society. But when I told my friend Oscar of my intention, he told me I can’t change people but if I want to have a real impact on them I should lead by example. So I decided to enter the spirit realm through Ayahuasca and once there, pulse my love through it, effectively raising the vibrations of planet Earth. Once I ate the five spoons of Ayahuasca, I lay down on my bed, focusing on my intentions. Within a half hour I felt my mind split in two as I started to have conversations with an unseen spirit. I was told they could see the love in me. The urge to merge my female and male energy came from the unknown, so I took my left hand (female) and right hand (male) and squeezed them together until the opposite energies blended into the light of love. I’m now so bright with love that everything else is hard to see. Closing my eyes I could see purple and pink spirit gears turning on the illusion of this 101

physical reality. I noticed it took about ten to fifteen seconds for the manifestation from the spirit realm to materialize in the physical. A thought came from this observation that soon produced a vision of hands reaching out from a bright white light trying to grab colorful projections. But as the hands wrapped around the colorful objects they would puff away like a thick cloud. Nothing is there except for the thought of it. About an hour and a half had passed since I took the medicine and it was time to let some of it out. Sitting on the toilet seat I was told that I had got My Love Shield, and nothing can penetrate it except Love. Sitting there, the unexpected thought came to me that I should take a bath. I thought since this is my final journey with entheogens, I could do my own cleansing ceremony. So I got the water running and grabbed a CD from my room called “Satori Sounds The Spirit of Healing Isochoric Alpha and Solfeggio 528hz Healing Meditations” to play. Turning on the CD and turning off the lights to embrace the night, I sunk myself into the hot tub. I could feel the presence of other spirits but felt the water was acting as a barrier from them being able to connect with me. This final journey of mine will be taken on my own, with no other accomplices or hindrances. Taking a deep breath I thought: “I’m done”, and plunged my head below the water, staying there until I ran out of breath. I dunked myself the second time saying “I’m cleansed,” and for the last one “I’m reborn.” Coming up for the final time, I rested my head on the tub and smiled widely, knowing this magnificent journey of mine was complete while I listened to the sounds of croaking frogs in the drizzling rain. As all my old energies flowed down the drain, I emerged anew. I had one last thing to show the spirit realm. Back on my bed I saw a labyrinth of golden snakes writhing in all directions, at times coming at me, snapping their mouths. I felt that they were not completely loving, so I beamed my love at them, vanishing them beneath the intense light that emanated from my body. After a few moments I allowed the visions to come again, seeing a dragon flying in an eye. Once again I felt it was not pulsing pure love towards me, so I beamed my love at this spirit as well, effectively banishing it with my light of love. I realized how powerful love is and that nothing can outmatch it. Thirty or so minutes later I threw up the last bit of negative energies, realizing what I must do next. This book is so powerful, so important. I hope that it’s going to be a galactic curiosity, stretching minds to a new set of possibilities. My last vision showed me myself as an intense energetic being of white light with a blue outline. Then before I knew it, I was asleep.

Conclusion Halfway through my journey writing this book, I visited my friend who first showed me Salvia Divinorum on the internet. I asked him why he had introduced it to me in the first place. He could not remember why, nor had he tried any psychedelics himself. What made it seem strange to me was the fact we were in a security job. Security officers are not the type of people you would expect to be interested in such things. I told another friend at the same job all I had been up to. He expressed disappointment at what I was doing, but strangely enough, 102

he seemed to be expecting me to focus my attention on the Alien connection with psychedelics instead of explaining what I had experienced. He also asked me why I would experiment with things such as psychedelics, and up until this point I’ve never had anyone ask me such a question. Answering him actually proved to be quite difficult, as he was a real skeptic on the issue. The formulated answer I would have for him now is, I did these things to expand my awareness of the mysteries of life, for this will prepare me to enter the spirit realm when the inevitable death of my body occurs. In addition to this, these substances have helped me feel more connected to everyone and everything. My depression is gone and I am much more creative. It has made me calmer and more positive with the realization that death is truly a passing and not an end. Lastly, it has made me more loving and understanding of people. Overall, it has shown me who I truly am and what the whole picture of life looks like from above, showing me that this life is a lot more interesting than I had thought. It fueled a purpose for me to find out more about this world and myself, and that the answer to most problems can be solved by advancing spiritually, and transcending the boundaries of programed thoughts. During some of my journeys into altered states of consciousness, I encountered aliens. It always appeared they were assisting me by raising my frequency of understanding and perception. I was never afraid of them and felt like they were doctors of a higher dimension, healing my spirit. I think they realize we are all of one mind trying to wake up from a dream. The only way we will succeed is if we all work together. I have a theory on why psychedelics help with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). It replaces the profoundly negative traumatic experience in your mind with the new positively profound psychedelic experience, effectively helping you to forget the negative traumatic experience. But it’s a bit more complicated than that. There are higher dimensional spirits that are assisting you on a psycho-spiritual surgery while your frequencies are opened up during a psychedelic trip.

Psychedelic Pyramid Guide of Enlightenment The following is a quick view of what I believe to be the most important Chemical Keys (psychedelics) to unlocking the mysteries of oneself. I have yet to learn the full lessons of meditation, so cannot say as yet where or how to apply it to spiritual growth. I strongly feel that with enough practice and good intent, it could be placed above them all. Shrooms The source: Pure joy/love, No sense of time/Death of the Ego, and No separation. Iboga 103

Shows you key moments of your entire life; past, present and future. Reboots the mind and purges toxins from the body.

Ayahuasca Shows a high level of truth while rebooting your mind and purging the toxins out.

DMT Shows spirits typically without any features, No sound from the spirits (except for the initial buzzing sound). Also an inner voice comes through my thoughts, and intense euphoria. Salvia Divinorum Guides you into the Spirit realm, where you can see and hear the spirits. Takes you anywhere/anytime. LSD Gives access to the library of your mind through visuals. Helps you empathize with others. Spice: JWH-018 Let’s you see your thoughts and able to feel the spirit realm. Queen Tetra (Cannabis) Turns the tracks in the brain to new ideas, dreamlike visuals, can be used to help meditation and feel the nirvana state, feel connected to nature, helps to realize everything around you is special, gives you creative ideas, takes away stress, kills cancer, takes away pain, puts a smile on your face and a whole lot more than I can think of. This Psychedelic Pyramid Guide of Enlightenment may have come out differently if I had a bigger dose of LSD, or even if I had done more, or different, psychedelics. Obviously there is always room for improvement. This pyramid is just as important to us as the food pyramid. Not only do we need the right nutrition for our bodies to be healthy, but also the right psychedelics, used correctly for our minds to be healthy. I have a wish that someday there will be Queen Tetra (Cannabis Sativa) bars, LSD think tank parties, Iboga clinics in every major city helping people get off harmful narcotic addictions, for adult initiation instead of a meaningless High School graduation. Having an experience confronting your inner most demons, and eliminating them from your life is more 104

beneficial than a sheet of paper. Using Salvia Divinorum to get quick answers from the spirit realm and to know such a realm exists. DMT therapy for the preparation of the transition to the spirit realm. Having a spiritual graduation with shrooms when the person has successfully completed the above. There is a religion using entheogens to explore the inner realms of the attendee’s selves. Having the experience of God instead of only having faith. Instead of Scruff McGruff, the crime dog, there’s an all wise shaman who teaches kids the truth of the infinite levels of consciousness. If we lived in such a world, I believe there would be hardly any violence. We would realize we are all gods present at our own creation and by vibrating ecstatic love we will attract it. And if we vibrate fear, we will attract that as well. I hope that this book interests people enough to question what they’ve been taught about psychedelics by our main stream society, and get rid of the unfounded fears and replacing them with truth. Psychedelics can play a very positive role in our society if we are taught how to use them correctly. Like any other tool there is a right way to use it and a wrong way. If we as a society teach the right way to use these substances instead of giving into the assumptions of ignorance we have been subjected to, we can reject the old taboos and find what’s been missing from our lives. The connection to the spirit. I try to remember what my good friend Al once told me. “If we were all the same, the world would be excruciatingly boring.” I also try to remember the concept of infinity and apply it to everything in life. There is infinity within love itself so I have this one request; every day whenever you get the chance, send out your vibrations of love. This simple act, joined with millions of other minds around the world doing the same thing could easily transform our world for the better. To say the least, the entheogens that I’ve used have healed my internal pain. I feel that I received what I needed from them; a new mind that has learned to vibrate love not fear. I realized that the mind is like an entire universe and I can go on forever discovering wonderful new insights as I travel its vast labyrinth. In the end I learned that Love is the answer to everything and I’m ready to live life to the fullest with that in mind. I leave you now and hope this book has shed some light on your own mysterious path. It has been a great privilege for me to be a part of this psychedelic trip that we call life. It’s time for me to fade back into the forest of consciousness and leave you to continue on your own journey. Pulse the LOVE. Spiritual Special Forces (S.S.F.) -Stewart Allen Mosher

(picture of “Re-Emergence” 105

APPENDIX

A

Books • Breaking Open the Head by Daniel Pinchbeck • The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire Harnessing the Infinite Power of Coincidence by Deepak Chopra • Psychedelic Drugs Reconsidered by Lester Grinspoon and James B. Bakalar • Supernatural: Meetings with the Ancient Teachers of Mankind by Graham Hancock • Food of the Gods: The Search for the Original Tree of Knowledge a Radical History of Plants, Drugs, and Human Evolution by Terence McKenna • Law of Attraction: The Basics of the teaching of Abraham by Esther Hicks and Jerry Hicks • My Ishmael by Daniel Quinn • The Disappearance of the Universe: Straight Talk about Illusions, Past Lives, Religion, Sex, Politics and the Miracles of Forgiveness by Gary R. Renard • The Secret of the Soul: Using Out-of-Body Experiences to Understand Our True Nature by William L. Buhlman • The Reincarnation of Edgar Cayce?: Interdimensional Communication and Global Transformation by Wynn Free and David Wilcock • DMT: The Spirit Molecule: A Doctor’s Revolutionary Research into the Biology of Near-Death and Mystical Experiences by Rick Strassman MD • Natural Cures They Don’t Want You To Know About by Kevin Trudeau • The Encyclopedia of Psychoactive Plants by Albert Hofmann • Hallucinogenic Plants of North America by Jonathan Ott • All of these books by Carlos Castaneda: The teachings of Don Juan, A Yaqui Way of Knowledge , A Separate Reality further Conversations with Don Juan, Journey to Ixtlan, Tales of Power, The Second Ring of Power, The Eagle‘‘s Gift, The Fire from Within, The Power of Silence, The Art of Dreaming, Magical Passes, The Active Side of Infinity, and The Wheel of Time. • The Witch’s Dream by Florinda Donner • Inner Paths to Outer Space - Journeys to alien worlds through psychedelics and other 106

spiritual technologies (get who it’s by) • Sage Spirit Salvia Divinorum and the Entheogenic Experience by Martin W Ball, Ph. D. • Peopled Darkness Perceptual transformation through Salvia Divinorum by • Astrotheology & Shamanism Christianity’s Pagan Roots by • The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test by Tom Wolfe • Transfigurations by Alex Grey • The Lazy Man’s Guide to Enlightenment by Thaddeus Golas • Shamanic Experience A Practical Guide to Psychic Powers By Kenneth Meadows • Life and Teaching of the Masters of the far East by Baird T. Spalding • The Emperor Wears No Clothes: The Authoritative Historical Record of Cannabis and the Conspiracy Against Marijuana by Jack Herer • The Pot Book A Complete Guide to Cannabis Its Role in Medicine, Politics, Science, and Culture by Julie Holland, M.D. • The Power of Awareness by Neville Lancelot Goddard

YouTube Videos (Titles as appearing on Youtube.com) • The 2012 Enigma By David Wilcock Pt. 1 • Bill Hicks-Positive Drug Story • Bill Hicks-Magic Mushrooms • Salvia Divinorum Study 1 of 5 • The Primacy of Consciousness (1 of 7) • Consciousness And Altered States P1 Graham Hancock • The use of psychedelic drugs changed me • What Entheogens taught me about god • The Union- The Business Behind Getting High (1/7) Marijuana Cannabis • Ibogaine-Rite of Passage Full Documentary part 1/6 • Iboga therapy • IBOGAINE IN THE NEWS • Bill O’reilly interviews Howard Lotsof on Ibogaine • Brue Parry Trips Again - Part 1- The Hallucinogen Iboga- Altered States of Consciousness • Gregg Braden on Consciousness • Joe Rogan talks about Marijuana and DMT • Mainstreaming Psychedelics: From FDA to Harvard to Burning Man • Joe Rogan Rant about Pot (Part 1 of 2) • Inside LSD Part 1-5 • The 11:11 Phenomena • Manifesting The Mind 1/12 • Cancer Killed by Cannabis-weed-pot-marijuana finds UCLA research and others Full-length Doc 107

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Alen Watts talks about Drugs 50 years of Mushroom experience ¼ DMT: The Spirit Molecule Documentary Part 1/5 Amanita Muscaria-Sacred Weeds Pt 1 of 5 The Pharmacratic Inquisition by Jan Irvin and Andrew Rutajit Joe Rogan-Beyond The Invisible part 1/11 Run From The Cure - The Rick Simpson Story (part 1of 7) The Beautiful Truth part 1 The Emperor’s Closet - part 2 - Marijuana Documentary- Jack Herer Grass: The History of Marijuana Joe Rogan on the reason Pot is illegal More Proof Cannabis is a medicine! (1of 2) Most shocking Wikileaks Yet! (illegal Cancer Cure=Genocide) How to use a cannabis vaporizor? Alex Grey-The Healing Power of Sacred Art (1/6) Peace Bud: Hemp Conspiracy TV Premiere BCC Horizon-Psychedelic Science DMT, LSD, Ibogaine-Part 1 A spirit call for healing with Eboka-Tabernanthe Iboga plant.flv ::MIND Blowing:: Watch this if you’re stoned Electric Universe-one step beyond Spirit World 2-4-Alien Kabbalah How Your Mind Co-Creates Reality Holographically Create your Reality Magic Weed The Truth 10 Common Myths About Weed Peyote to LSD-A Psychedelic Odyssey The truth and facts of Marijuana Marijuana A Chronic History part 1 of 2 50 Famous Quotes on Marijuana (Cannabis Hemp) Rainbow Bridge (Part 1 of 9) Note: part 5 of 9 is the best 10min of the movie! Timothy Leary Television Interview: Paganism, Shamanism & Psychedelics David Icke-Aliens they live David Icke-We think we are Humans Take Back Your Mind! We Should All Do Majic Mushrooms Today! The Cannabis Revolution! Bill Hicks – Mandatory Marijuana Bill Hicks Marijuana Jokes John Marco Allegro’s The Sacred Mushroom and the cross-40th anniversary edition Sam Harris Talks About Drug Laws – “The End of Faith” Don Hill-Stoned Straight (Psychedelic therapy) [1/3] 108



Cremaster One (Part 1/5)

Web Sites • www.gnosticmedia.com • www.pharmacratic-inquisition.com • www.sagewisdom.org/userguide.html • www.alexgrey.com • www.shamanic-extracts.com • On Wikipedia look up Salvia Divinorum, Incocybe Mushroom, DMT, LSD, Cannabis, Ibogaine, Ayahuasca and JWH-018 (A.K.A. Spice or Funky Monkey) • www.salviatruth.com • www.neurosoup.com • www.mindmovie.com • www.ibogaquest.com • www.docvape.com • www.psychedelicjunction.blogspot.com • www.themimosaproject.blogspot.com • http://drogriporter.hu/en/drugsestandsettingtoday • www.drughreporter.net • www.thejaguarpath.com • www.ibogahouse.com Music • Detaching from the World • Progressive Melodic Psy Trance Mix 5 2011 (on YouTube.com) • Voyage through space and galaxies (on YouTube.com) Movies • What The Bleep Do We Know!? • The Secret • The Pharmacratic Inquisition by Jan Irvin and Andrew Rutajit • The Rave Diet & Lifestyle The Natural Foods Diet with Meals That Heal by Mike Anderson (DVD Eating 3rd Edition) • Enter the Void • NORML • American Drug War: The last white hope • High: The true tale of American Marijuana • Magic Trip 109

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2012: Time for Change How Weed Won the West Hempsters: Plant the seed A/K/A Tommy Chong Totally Baked: Unrated Peaceful Warrior DMT: The Spirit Molecule Facing the Habit Growing Op Humboldt County Altered States

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