Chasing the Storm From the Sky

April 20, 2017 | Author: fazriyahputri | Category: N/A
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Chasing the Storm From the Sky "So tell me" Tiffany said suddenly and Taeyeon almost jumped out of her skin. "Who is it?" Finally. Taeyeon let her fingers run through the cool sand beneath her as she drew a deep breath. Now. She turned toward Tiffany. "Okay, look" she began, gathering her words. "I'm sorry about this, and I wish I didn't have to tell you this, but I do. It's killing me. Okay? So I hope that --" "Taetae..." Tiffany interrupted, opening her eyes and looking straight at Taeyeon. Taeyeon's eyes opened wide and she fell silent. She didn't understand. "Is it me?"

Chasing the Storm From the Sky (1/3) The timing is perfect. The sky is clear, the sun is shining, and it's a perfect evening to spend on the beach. With your best friend. ...who you're also madly in love with, without her knowing it. It hasn't gone that long, only about a month, so I haven't had to pretend as much as I thought I would. But a month is definitely more than enough to drive me halfway to insanity. And that's why I'm going to tell Tiffany tonight - out on the beach, with the sun and the waves and... The timing is perfect.

Best friends. At least that's what they used to be. That's what they used to call each other when they stayed up until the middle of the night, listening to the soundtrack from The Lion King, just for the nostalgia of it. What they felt every time they sang together. That's what they said when they told other people about each other - "Taeyeon, my best friend, she always says that..." They were best friends when they baked burned cookies, played soccer, wiped off their spilled soft drinks from the floor, when they rolled around on the grass, laughing until they couldn't breathe. That's what they used to be. But something happened, that couldn't really be explained somehow, they both stopped calling. At the same time. They didn't fight, they didn't cancel the promises of eternal friendship - they... drifted apart. Drifted apart... Taeyeon thought of those two words a lot in the seven months herself and Tiffany spent apart. How was it possible that such a thing could happen? She hadn't changed. She hadn't, right? And last time she saw Tiffany, she was still her same wonderful self. They had still laughed. They had still loved. So she never understood, and even though they talked from time to time, she never had the

guts to ask what "drifted apart" really meant. But that was all going to change, one day when the rain was in the air.

There was a festival in town. A big, loud, obnoxious festival, with a lot of people, a lot of bands, and a ridiculously expensive entrance fee. No bands really caught her interest, and just entering the town itself was not worth all that money - but somehow, Taeyeon couldn't help but joining the mass of overexcited people. The evening started with a bright sun, but to Taeyeon, it felt like... a stress factor. A big, sunny stress factor, shining along with all the people passing her in the streets, on their way to the next concert, to get cotton candy, or find a place to eat. She didn't want to go with any of her friends, although she knew they were already there, somewhere, in the mass of strangers. They were far away today. As time went on, and Taeyeon walked around on the streets, the clouds shifted into darkness. The shades of grey eventually took over, and all of a sudden, the pouring rain was there. Not bothering to find a dry place, she observed all the screaming, blond teenagers, running for cover to protect their make-up and complicated hairdos. She enjoyed the loneliness. She was never much for company, or large crowds. She didn't mind being with her friends, but loneliness sometimes just had a... certain charm, she thought. She used to share that thought with someone... Who was it? The rain started letting up, and she felt her cellphone vibrate softly in her pocket. She pulled it up, and read the text message she least had expected to see. Are you at the street festival? Tiffany xx What was that? Did she want to meet? In all honesty, Taeyeon didn't know for sure if she wanted to see Tiffany again. What if everything had become awkward with all the time that had passed between them, all the memories that had started to slowly fade away? And what if it's not... Yes, I'm here. Are you here too? x

Of course! Can we meet? xx If you want to. Where are you? xx I'm by the Chinese restaurant by the main stage, you know the one? x Yes. I'll be there. x Oh, Taeyeon had never known how to say no to Tiffany anyway. She walked up the street outside the Chinese restaurant. The clouds held on to their grey colors, but the rain was gone. The smell of rain on asphalt was a little sour to her, but she loved it. It kept on reminding her that it really was summer - the beginning of July, to be exact. Her favorite time of the year. She looked up, and on the other side of the long street, there she was. Tiffany. Her hair a lot longer than last time she saw her - a brighter brown color, too. It suited her very well. Around her were her new friends that Taeyeon didn't know and had never met, and a shiver of fear went down her spine. She had never liked sharing friends with strangers. All of a sudden, Tiffany looked up from her crowd of friends, and saw Taeyeon. She didn't smile. She didn't do anything, at first. She just looked back at her, and Taeyeon stopped walking. Tiffany was so beautiful to her. She had grown up a lot, even if they'd only been apart for seven months. She was glowing. An angel with dark eyes. Tiffany broke out from her group of friends without a word, and they all stared at her back with confused eyes. She started running towards Taeyeon, faster, faster, and Taeyeon could feel her own legs start to carry herself forward too, along the street, between the people who had started to come out from the safe hideaways from the rain... And Tiffany crashed into her embrace. Her body was warm, her long hair flew over Taeyeon's shoulders, and she was back. Taeyeon could feel her whole world already become effected by

Tiffany's presence. Even if it was something a little bit different about it this time... Neither of them spoke. Taeyeon didn't know whether it was because they didn't know what to say, or if it was just a naturally quiet moment. Natural silence. They just held each other, swaying lightly from side to side. "Hello, Taetae" Tiffany whispered eventually. "Hi..." Taeyeon answered, not letting go. "I've missed you." Tiffany's voice was low, husky and filled with emotion. Taeyeon wondered for the millionth time how their time apart really had affected Tiffany. "I missed you too." And they finally broke apart and really looked at each other. Yes, those dark eyes... had always had an effect on Taeyeon that she couldn't collect anywhere else. But it wasn't the same. And it wasn't a negative change... it was... something new. Something that tingled somewhere deep down in her stomach. Something... heavy. And something wonderful. "How are you?" It was a simple question, but the answer was harder. "I'm good, now." "Good." And the silence was back. Tiffany was looking into her eyes as if she was searching for something, and Taeyeon felt oddly insecure as she looked back. Something different... "I just wanted to see you for a bit, it's been a long time" Tiffany said, her face showing sadness. "I won't keep you if you're busy with something." "No, I..." Taeyeon began, but the new difference, the new taste, was somehow scaring her a little. Tiffany waited for an end to that sentence, but when no words seem to come, she appeared to give up. "Well, I should get back to my friends anyway" she said. "Are their eyes burning holes in my back?" She nodded in direction of her new crowd. Taeyeon looked over Tiffany's shoulder. "Yeah" she said, "and they look pretty offended, too." She was confused by her own

emotionless voice, and coughed a couple of times. "Then I'd better get back." Taeyeon nodded. "Listen, I wish you and me wouldn't have lost contact" she said, still with a sad look. "And I wish we could take it back up again. Do you think we can?" The question was honest, hopeful and a little desperate. Taeyeon didn't know the answer, but she didn't want to break any of those emotions, so she nodded a yes. "Great" Tiffany said with a smile that made her eyes smaller, in a gorgeous way that Taeyeon had never really realized before. "Can we get together next Friday? My place?" Everything was moving so fast and Taeyeon almost didn't know what she was agreeing to, but she nodded again, and all of a sudden, Tiffany had hugged her again and jumped off to her friends. And Taeyeon was walking away. Alone, again. Maybe that's what I did before, too, she thought. Maybe I was the one who walked away. Who's to know? She suddenly realized that she forgot to ask Tiffany how she was. Something was making her lose her senses when Tiffany was around.

So, a month passed. Taeyeon had been right when she nodded an answer to Tiffany's question could they start seeing each other again? Things were back to normal. 7-months-ago normal. ...Almost. It didn't take longer than a couple of hours after they met that day at the festival, that Taeyeon realized why the meeting with Tiffany frightened her a little. Love. A truly frightening concept. Especially when it's your best friend - who's also a girl. She didn't know how to deal with it. Who to talk to, what to say - it came out of nowhere. She

had never experienced anything like it before, and before she even had time to think about it, it was just thrown in her face. And it was every day. Every time she closed her eyes at night and every time she opened them in the morning. She felt it all the time. Not just when she was thinking about Tiffany (which, granted, was pretty often), but she was starting to believe that love was an actual physical thing that had taken a place inside of her. Always there, heavy on her heart. And there was so much to think about - so much obsessing to do about Tiffany's every single word and movement. So many details to work through. And nobody knew. She had considered telling Sooyoung, one of her friends, because she thought Sooyoung might understand, or at least accept her for it. But every time she opened her mouth, something useless about the day she had had would come out. She just needed to get it out. Maybe letting the words out might take away some pressure on her heart, and who knew what kind of response she would get. She knew Tiffany was understanding as a person, and that she'd never judge her for who she was in love with. Tiffany understood love. But when Taeyeon was in love with her, maybe it was different. But none of it mattered. Taeyeon was going to take her chance, because a part of her felt that she couldn't just be friends with Tiffany anymore. In the end, she didn't really have a choice. That actual, physical thing inside her controlled her more than she liked. She was going to tell her.

So she found her chance on the night they went out to the beach. It wasn't a planned trip, it was one of Tiffany's impulsive choices. They had ridden out there on Tiffany's moped. Taeyeon sat behind her and held her as tight as she could, taking in the feeling of Tiffany's body next to hers. It was nothing new. But it was

thrilling. And she was terrified of the moped. Feeling Tiffany like that, still wasn't something she could be happy with. She didn't want Tiffany to be there, so close to her, just because she had to. A day when Tiffany would want to hold her hand and hold her as they fell asleep together, seemed so distant. And yet, that thought was always so close to the surface. If there was anything Taeyeon liked more than a warm July night on the beach, it was a warm July night on the beach with Tiffany. When they walked through the grass leading to the beach, Taeyeon's heart was beating violently. It was perfect. ...Until Tiffany threw a bunch of grass at her. Taeyeon looked at her in confusion, before reaching down and grabbing her own fistful of weed - and so the war had started. She chased Tiffany to the start of the beach, where Tiffany fell head first into the sand, laughing as she flew. Taeyeon ran up to her and threw her last pieces of grass into her face, before she, exhausted, sat down in the sand beside Tiffany. She could feel herself starting to sweat, and she longingly thought of the breeze of the sea. Tiffany coughed while trying to regain her breath. "I've got grass in my nose!" "What?" Taeyeon said in disbelief. "You put grass in my nose!" Tiffany half blew her nose and half laughed, while shooting Taeyeon both angry and amused glances. "I'm sorry" Taeyeon managed to say between her giggles. "I didn't even know I could do that!" "No, who would have thought..." Tiffany mumbled. "Ugh, it's coming down into my mouth!" Taeyeon could almost feel herself starting to gag and she stood up, not wanting to look at Tiffany right then. "That's... gross" she said, though still she couldn't stop laughing.

"Euuugguh" Tiffany groaned and pulled out the piece of grass out of her mouth. "Look at this!" she said to Taeyeon, who stood with her back towards her. "No, no, I'm good." "No, seriously, look what you did to me!" Tiffany got up and started walking towards Taeyeon, who violently turned around, afraid of getting the slimy grass thrown at her. "It's fine, really" she said, laughing again. "I don't really want to see it!" She started backing towards the shore as Tiffany got closer to her. "Are you sure?" "Yes, very!" "I'm not. I think you should see it." Tiffany lunged towards her and Taeyeon screamed in disgust, gripping at Tiffany's wrists to keep the grass away from her. "Come on! That thing has been in your nose!" Taeyeon yelled. "Exactly" Tiffany laughed. "And you put it there!" They laughed and wrestled for a while, before the nose-traveling plant fell out of Tiffany's grip. "Damn" she mumbled and looked down at it. Taeyeon followed her gaze and quickly covered the grass up with sand, using her foot. Tiffany looked back at her. And there it was again. The thing inside her came to life and started beating at her stomach. Realizing she was still holding on to Tiffany's wrists, she hastily let go and shook some sand out of her hair. Tiffany repeated her actions. "Come on" Tiffany said, holding out her hand to Taeyeon, "let's go down to the water." Taeyeon's brain clicked, and she knew the moment was coming. She took Tiffany's hand, and let her lead her down to the shoreline.

"Do you remember the time when you put a little rock in your own ear, and we couldn't get it out?" Taeyeon asked. Tiffany laughed. "Of course I do. Why do you wanna make me lose my senses?" The sun was just about to go down over the water. To their left was a pier, supported by big

blocks of stone, letting the sun's last rays of light linger on it. "I don't, really. But you should have seen the look on your face when you realized you couldn't get it out." Taeyeon laughed at the memory. "What?! You were as panicked as I was!" Taeyeon gave her a look. "Okay, almost." The waves were not very high, but the wind was still strong enough for them to enjoy the sound of the water, the waves washing up on the sand in front of them. The warm breeze was like a sheet of silk to Taeyeon's face, and as she looked to her right, she could see it blowing through Tiffany's hair. There she was. The one that had brought all this on. The one. Taeyeon took a deep breath. Tiffany had closed her eyes, enjoying the wind on her face. "When you close your eyes like this, it's not hard to imagine you're floating, or... flying." Taeyeon didn't close her eyes. She didn't want to fly, or float. She wanted to be right there, in the moment. "Yeah" she said. "Have you ever really been in love?" Taeyeon asked. Tiffany didn't open her eyes, and she kept quiet so long that Taeyeon started to suspect she didn't hear the question. "Yes." "What was that like?" Again, silence fell. A long silence, which made Taeyeon impatient. The anxiety of the words she wanted to get out were burning inside of her. Maybe I should have just said it, she thought. "It was horrible." "In what way?" Silence again. "Too many emotions just... running wild. All the time, every day." Taeyeon understood. "I hate feeling like I can't control myself, like I'm doing all these stupid things cause I can't think straight. And when I regain the ability to think clearly, I feel like shit for being such an idiot."

Tiffany still hadn't opened her eyes, and somehow Taeyeon felt it made everything easier. "I see" she said. "Why do you ask?" Tiffany asked and slowly shook her head once to each side. Her hair blew up in the wind behind her. "Well" Taeyeon started, looking straight at Tiffany. She realized she had no idea what to say. "I'm in love, now" she sad eventually, thinking that must be the easiest way. To her surprise, Tiffany nodded. "I thought so." That was all. The only response. Taeyeon felt desperation creep up in her chest, mentally trying to get Tiffany to ask questions. Ask who it was. "Oh" Taeyeon mumbled. And seconds passed. The silence, usually so comfortable between the two of them, pressed heavily on Taeyeon's mind. She considered giving up on her plan, but one part of her told her to just... power through. It had to be done. "So tell me" Tiffany said suddenly and Taeyeon almost jumped out of her skin. "Who is it?" Finally. Taeyeon let her fingers run through the cool sand beneath her as she drew a deep breath. Now. She turned toward Tiffany. "Okay, look" she began, gathering her words. "I'm sorry about this, and I wish I didn't have to tell you this, but I do. It's killing me. Okay? So I hope that --" "Taetae..." Tiffany interrupted, opening her eyes and looking straight at Taeyeon. Taeyeon's eyes opened wide and she fell silent. She didn't understand. "Is it me?" The question. She didn't expect this. She was supposed to make a confession, a million apologies and make Tiffany... understand. Even though she wasn't really clear on everything herself. Of course she didn't want to lose Tiffany, in any sense, but the friendship thing had become such a burden when her insides were aching with longing for more.

Now, Tiffany went and asked the question and ruined all possibilities for explanation. It all sounded different when you put it like that. "What?" "Is it? Is it me?" Tiffany's eyes were piercing her. Her stare was so intense Taeyeon wanted to look away, but she forced herself to meet the dark gaze. "What makes you think that?" she heard herself say. "You've been acting..." And no continuation. Taeyeon's heart sank - had been acting how? "...like you had a secret." Spot on. "I did." Taeyeon felt like she had already confessed, like she'd finally given it all away without even saying it. "So... it is me?" Taeyeon took another deep breath. "Yes. It's you." And there it was. Everything. Her world was exposed and ready to be smashed. "Taetae..." Tiffany mumbled, turning herself around so that they were both facing each other. Taeyeon had always loved that Tiffany called her that, and it sounded more wonderful every time she said it. Tiffany grabbed her hand in silence, and Taeyeon felt no hope. No fear. No excitement or disappointment, relief or disbelief. But she was at peace - it was no longer just inside her anymore. It was everywhere. Out in the open. "Yeah." "I like you." And Taeyeon hereby officially hated sentences that had more than one interpretation. In a

moment like this, everything should be so clear that you can't make a mistake. She felt like she really couldn't afford to get her hopes up. "Well, as a friend" Taeyeon said, trying to clear her own aching misunderstanding up. "No, not just as a friend" Tiffany said with a head tilt. "I like you." The wind was getting calmer. The sound of the waves weren't as loud anymore, and the sun was just about gone. Darkness had started to fall. And there were still some words that Taeyeon's mind could not process. Three words that lost their meaning and couldn't be put together in a sentence. It was everything that she hadn't expected. "You do?" A shaking voice. "Yes, I do. I have for a while." A while. What was a while? A long while, or a short while? And why was it even important? A sudden breeze interrupted their conversation and toyed with their hair. Some sand blew in the distance of the beach, looking like a tropical fog. "So..." Taeyeon mumbled. But there were still no words. "I would love to be with you, Taetae." It was everything Taeyeon could imagine - and still there was something that wasn't quite right. "You would?" she asked, so scared, so happy, and so confused about her own senses. "Yes. But I can't." And that's what it was. That's where it fell. "Why?" The answer was coming, but Taeyeon could see it was hard for Tiffany to say it. Like she was ashamed of it. She could see Tiffany's wish to cry, even though she held it back. "Because I'm scared... of what the others would think." "The others?" Tiffany nodded. "My friends. My family." Taeyeon didn't answer. She didn't know what to say. She let her gaze rest on the waves again. It

was safer that way. "I'm sorry" Tiffany continued. Yes, it made a difference to Taeyeon. Not a big difference, but good enough. She nodded. "I'm sorry that I'm so weak and that I'm too afraid to go for what I really want" Tiffany said, and she had the voice of someone suffering. It made Taeyeon turn her gaze from the water to the beautiful girl beside her again. "I don't know what to say." She didn't know how to change Tiffany's mind. They were going to be kept apart by some people who's opinions may or may not be negative? Nobody else could ever make her not want to be with Tiffany. Tiffany started playing with Taeyeon's hair. She felt Tiffany's cold hand as it graced her cheek for just a second. For just a second. "I hope you can forgive me" Tiffany pleaded. Taeyeon was next to close her eyes. She enjoyed, for the first time, the touch of someone who was in love with her. "It's just..." she said. "You're the one living your life. Not them." Tiffany gave her hair another three strokes before letting her hand fall down in her lap. "I know."

They walked out on the pier together. Taeyeon wanted to hold Tiffany's hand, but she didn't want to get used to something she knew would be taken away from her. The darkness was just around the corner, while the waves just slowly and almost silently washed up against the rocks around them. She knew she should think about the future, but it was so hard right then and there, with Tiffany's presence like a painful blessing. How would they get by? They climbed out to the rocks at the very end of the pier, looking out to the calm water, the

darkness. They sat pressed against each other on the same rock, but there were no arms around each other. No head on shoulder, no holding hands. It was all there, so close, but if it was just for the moment, maybe it was better to leave it. "I'm gonna ask you a strange question" Tiffany said suddenly. "Alright." "Why do you like me?" They both looked straight out into the ocean, not even glancing at each other. Taeyeon sighed a little. She had had some time to think about that. "Because you're... Because you freak out every time you see something pink in a shop." Tiffany laughed. "Because you're such an American Girl, you know? Because of the way you complain that your nails are so weak every time they break. Because you cry at Disney movies and... the way you hide behind me every time we come across a bug." Tiffany shivered. "You know, you should probably seek some help for that" Taeyeon said, finally looking at Tiffany. "I've already called the exterminators. They say they can't spray the entire world, apparently it's too much work." Taeyeon gave a short laugh. "How unprofessional of them." "I know, right?" A slight nod from Taeyeon, and then they entered their natural state, in silence, again. It was okay. She didn't need Tiffany's promises or apologies. She felt as if though, maybe, this was their last night together, before everything would get too hard. She would be surprised if it wasn't so. So there were still a few things left to tell her. "Last night I dreamed that I sang at your funeral." She didn't know why it felt so important to say it.

"You did?" And the water was calm. No waves. No sound. "Yes, I did." "What did you sing?" Tiffany sounded weirdly curious about the concept of her own funeral. Or what her funeral would be like in Taeyeon's mind. "I could sing it to you now, if you want." "Yes, please! I love your singing." Taeyeon, of course, already knew that. "Okay." If only you could see the tears in the world you left behind If only you could heal my heart just one more time Even when I close my eyes there's an image of your face And once again I've come to realize You're a loss I can't replace And silence followed again. "Would you sing that for me? On my actual funeral?" Tiffany asked. "No." "Why not?" "Cause you're not gonna die" Taeyeon refused. "Never ever." Tiffany laughed. "That's right, I forgot." Tiffany leaned her head on Taeyeon's shoulder, and for Taeyeon, it meant everything. It was something she'd experienced many times, but not like this. Not with knowing that Tiffany had feelings for her, and that she enjoyed the feeling of closeness with her. It was getting colder as the evening was starting to turn into night. The darkness was complete. Taeyeon shivered a little at the thought of getting back on the moped and going all the way back home on that death machine, the cold air pressed tightly around her.

"We should probably get going" Tiffany said, as if she had been reading Taeyeon's mind. If that was the case, it wouldn't be the first time. "I don't want it to be too cold when we drive home, or we're probably gonna freeze to death." "I was just thinking about that" Taeyeon answered, trying to hide her usual excitement over their connection. Tiffany lifted her head from Taeyeon's shoulder, looked up and smiled at her. Taeyeon didn't know what she preferred - Tiffany's head on her shoulder or her smile. Tiffany got up, climbed back up to the pier and offered her hand to Taeyeon, who immediately took it. Back on the ground, with a pain in her knees and body cold under the thin clothes, she expected Tiffany to let go of her hand. But she didn't. And they walked through the dead silent world around them, the only sound coming from the gravel under their feet. Tiffany's hand was warming hers. And something was going to happen. She just knew it. It might have been the last night, but it wasn't going to end there.

Chasing the Storm From the Sky (2/3) It was supposed to have been their last night. Taeyeon felt it when she left Tiffany the next morning. The long goodbye, that was intimate yet carefully kept behind the lines of friendship. She had expected Tiffany, like herself, would want to want to be left alone, but to her surprise, Tiffany kept texting her. Everyday. And everytime Taeyeon read those texts, that physical thing called love wrenched in her stomach. She didn't know what to make of it. She didn't know that a simple "hi, how are you today?" could make you so unbelievably confused. If she didn't want Taeyeon's love, then what was she after? Was it to taunt Taeyeon, or did she simply not know how to stay away from her? Taeyeon didn't understand, and she wasn't sure she wanted to, either. Mostly she ignored the texts, and she knew Tiffany understood that. But sometimes she answered, too. And everything was like before. Despite feeling so confused, the expected awkwardness never arrived. But Taeyeon chose to not get too close with Tiffany again. If it was gonna end, it might aswell just end fast. With as little pain as possible.

She was doing good with moving on and ignoring, until the one day when Tiffany called her. It was the first time they had spoken since their "last" night... and Taeyeon was terrified when she answered. "Hello?" "Hi, it's Tiffany." Yeah, but why? "Oh. Hi." Silence. Was that all?

"...hello?" "Yes, I'm sorry." Tiffany giggled at herself. "I was just, um, calling to... say that Sooyoung invited me over to her place this Friday." What was that? "What?" "Yeah, uhm, I mean, she wants you and me to come over." "Why?" Taeyeon hadn't actually told Sooyoung what had happened inside of her. And she wasn't planning to. The less reminders she got of it, the better. "I don't know." She was sad to hear that Tiffany sounded like... a colleague you don't really like, but have to do assignments with. "Apparently some friend of hers is coming there and she wants us to meet her." "Who?" "I don't know, some girl from town." "Okay." Silence again. "So, will you be there?" Tiffany's question broke her out of her wonderings. "Uh... yeah, I-I guess so" Taeyeon said. She tried to be a little less than nice to Tiffany without being an outright idiot. "Okay." Silence. "I'll... I'll see you, then." "Yeah. Bye." When the call ended, Taeyeon cried because she had never treated Tiffany in any other way than a princess before. And talking to her like someone who didn't matter was breaking her heart. Tiffany deserved more.

Deep breaths. It was close to midnight, and the evening had so far been alright. Almost okay. In fact, in almost every way, it was a really great night. She could even look at Tiffany sometimes and forget that... their time together had to end. She had to remind herself to not laugh too hard at her jokes. Not sit too close to her. Not talk to her as much as usual. And she had come to find, it was one of the hardest things she had ever had to do. They were sitting on the floor in Sooyoung's room, drinking coca cola out of wine glasses. Sooyoung had always told her that drinking out of wine glasses made her feel like a grown-up, no matter what beverage. Taeyeon used to always laugh when she thought of it. Some weird, dark, heavy music was playing in the barely lit room. Taeyeon had no memory of Sooyoung ever liking that kind of music, but then again, she could see that her new friend, Hyoyeon, thoroughly enjoyed it... Tiffany, on the other hand, looked outright scared. And Taeyeon had to admit, she was a little uncomfortable. Sooyoung's house lay in the forest, in the middle of nowhere. The man on the CD's raspy voice mixed with the shadows from the trees outside and the smell of incense made a rather unfriendly blend. "Wow, it's hot in here." Everyone's eyes turned to Hyoyeon. "Kinda." And Taeyeon saw how Sooyoung was looking at the older girl. "Let's go outside." Tiffany looked like she was about to panic at the suggestion. "Really? S-Should we really?" "Yeah! Why not?"

"I mean it's just... so... so late." Tiffany looked at the clock on the wall. Her terrified expression made Taeyeon want to take her in her arms and protect her from all the things that she didn't need to be protected from. The shadows. The darkness. But she chose to protect herself. And Sooyoung seemed very set on going outside. "Yeah, but look at the fog!" They all got up on their knees and looked out the window. Fullmoon and fog over a meadow - it looked just about surreal. "Wow..." "My thoughts exactly. So let's go!" Hyoyeon and Sooyoung ran for the door. Taeyeon rose from the silence and looked back at the girl on the floor. Tiffany reluctantly started to get up to follow the others... And Taeyeon was careful not to reach out her hand to help her up.

As soon as they walked out the door, Taeyeon faced her first big problem in her plan to move on: Frogs. Frogs, everywhere. She screamed. And Sooyoung and Tiffany laughed, while Hyoyeon looked confused. "She hates frogs." Sooyoung was fast to answer first. "We can't walk like this! I can't do it!" "Why not?" Tiffany looked at her, amused. "It's gross." Tiffany walked up to her and turned her back to her. "Well then jump on."

"What?" Hyoyeon and Sooyoung looked at them. "Jump on my back!" "Why?" "So you don't have to walk with the frogs?" Something inside Taeyeon ticked and exploded peacefully. She had to think up a reason to not... "I'm way too heavy." She laughed awkwardly and wanted to smack herself. "Don't be an idiot, shorty." "Hey!" Taeyeon slapped her on the arm, before realising what she was doing. Being... normal... with Tiffany. Just what she wasn't supposed to do. She cursed Sooyoung for inviting them both there that night. "Come on, now, jump on!" Tiffany nudged her. "Yes, come on, Tae, get a move on." Taeyeon glared at Sooyoung. "Fine." She gave up. She grabbed Tiffany's arms and jumped as high as she could. Tiffany caught her, stumbled a few steps, and eventually steadied. Her hair smelled like melon. Taeyeon tried to restrain herself, but being so close to Tiffany made all the love she felt for her ache inside her. Just like she feared it would. She put her arms around Tiffany's neck and tried to not fall off as they started walking down the road. The fullmoon was the only thing that gave light to their scene. It was dead silent, aside from the distant breeze in the trees on the left side of the road. Tiffany stumbled with a squealing Taeyeon on her back, with Hyoyeon and Sooyoung wandering behind them, deep in conversation. Taeyeon dared to sneak a look back at them, and more heard than saw Sooyoung laugh loudly

at one of Hyoyeon's jokes. She nodded to herself, half in surprise, half in a amusement. Oh, Sooyoung. She jumped off Tiffany's back on the field. "There! Free from the frogs." Taeyeon nodded. She didn't want to say anything. The cheeriness in Tiffany's voice made her want to scream with guilt. Sooyoung and Hyoyeon caught up to them and Taeyeon was saved. "Wow..." Hyoyeon's mumble woke Taeyeon from her daze, and she looked around. The field looked miraculous when they were standing in it. The fog was thick enough for them to not even see the road they came from anymore. "It's amazing." Tiffany's fear seemed to have vanished, and Taeyeon couldn't help but wonder... if it was because of her. They walked slowly through the field, the cold of the mid-August night getting through their thin jackets. Sooyoung and Hyoyeon wandered off by themselves again, and as much as Taeyeon dreaded being alone with Tiffany, she didn't want to bother them. She could imagine how that would feel. And when Tiffany started talking to her again, she could feel her senses start to give up their Tiffany-resistance. Everytime Tiffany said something, she could feel herself responding like she always used to. Laugh with her. Hold their eye contact as long as she dared. Those eyes were gonna be the death of her. She looked for her self-control. It wasn't long before she found that she had none.

Suddenly, they noticed a hill, right in front of them. It was high enough to disappear into the fog

around them, they didn't see the end of it. "Let's get up there! Can you imagine what the view would be like from up there?" Tiffany's excitement felt adoreable to Taeyeon, but she restrained herself. For once. She looked over towards Sooyoung and Hyoyeon. They were disappearing into the fog... Taeyeon squinted... and they were holding hands. "It looks pretty slippery to me." She let her foot slide over the wet grass to prove her point. Tiffany shook her head. "Doesn't matter. We are going up there." And Taeyeon found herself being dragged up the hill in the pale darkness. And Tiffany was holding her hand again. Not surprisingly, Tiffany was right about the view. It was incredible. The fullmoon was just about opposite of them, like a natural search light, and Taeyeon felt strong. The moment Tiffany had touched her hand, she had given up all attempts to keep her at a distance. It was impossible. Epescially since, in the moonlight, Tiffany looked more perfect than ever. "Are you freezing?" Tiffany looked at her and shook her head. "No." "You're shaking." Tiffany looked down at her crossed arms and smiled awkwardly. "Yeah, well, okay." And Taeyeon laughed. "Here, you can have my jacket." She pulled it off her arms and felt the midnight cold on her skin. Hiding her shivers, she handed the jacket to Tiffany. "Aww, Taetae, you're so cheesy." She let Taeyeon help her put it on. "Don't forget 'manly'."

Tiffany held out her hands, and the saw the sleeves of the jacket end several centimeters too far up on Tiffany's wrists. "It's a little small..." Taeyeon tilted her head. "No. It's perfect." Tiffany's words sounded so honest it made Taeyeon whimper. She forced herself to look away from the angel beside her and tried to take in the fogged view below. It was perfect. Like a scene from a movie, she thought. A place you can't find in real life. And standing there with a person that's too good to be found in real life too... "Now you're freezing." The fact that Tiffany's voice was filled with worry made Taeyeon smile. "No." Lie. "You're shaking." Damn. Suddenly she felt Tiffany's arms encircle her from behind. Her hands slid slowly over the side of Taeyeon's stomach before they met over her bellybutton. She pressed their bodies closely together, leaning her head on Taeyeon's shoulder, and Taeyeon lost her mind. She leaned back into the embrace and she wasn't sure she really existed. The warmth of Tiffany's body next to hers surrounded her, comforted her, took her over. She leaned her head back on Tiffany's shoulder and closed her eyes. That was how she wanted to live her life. Forever, in Tiffany's embrace. That was all she needed. Knowing that that was was she needed to feel complete, knowing that that was everything she'd dreamed of... and knowing that it was the one thing she couldn't have.

And in that moment, she wished she'd care enough about her future pain to break free. But she couldn't. Tiffany's arms around her waist... Tiffany's breath on her neck made her lose the ability to think clearly. So in that moment, she could pretend. She could forget. And she was okay. They stood in silence, completely still, watching the fog creeping over the grass. Taeyeon turned her head and looked to the right, where she had seen Hyoyeon and Sooyoung disappear 20 minutes earlier. She was not very surprised to see them standing closely together, their lips locked in a careful first kiss. "Look" she whispered. Tiffany followed her gaze and gasped a little when she saw them. "Oh my." "Agreed." "That's... pretty unexpected." Taeyeon raised an eyebrow. "Not really." "No?" Tiffany giggled. "No... Did you not see the way they were with each other in there?" Tiffany carefully shook her hair out of her eyes. It hit Taeyeon's cheek and she felt the smell of melon again. "No, I didn't. And since when can you take hints?" "What do you mean?" Taeyeon was confused. "Since always." "Oh yeah? Is that why for four years you never realized I was in love with you?" With all her willpower, Taeyeon broke loose from Tiffany's embrace. "What?" And Tiffany looked away. "Yeah..." Taeyeon's naive shock went through her like electricity.

"And you never told me?" "No." "Why?" A thoughtful silence. "If I had an answer, Taetae, I would tell you." Taeyeon made an effort to understand, as silence fell again. She took Tiffany's hand and just stood by her side. The knowledge that Tiffany had been in love with her all this time gave her a mixture of guilt and happiness. A want to make it up to her. But most of all, confusion about why Tiffany didn't want to accept the person she apparently had loved for four years. "Have you ever dreamt of running through a foggy field in the middle of the night?" Taeyeon laughed. "No, I can't say that I have." "Well, okay, me neither, but let's pretend that we have." "Why?" And Tiffany held Taeyeon's hand tight and ran through the wet grass down the hill. Taeyeon screamed as they rushed through the cold midnight air. Tiffany was pulling her forward faster, faster, and faster, and Taeyeon couldn't help but laugh as she desperately tried to keep control over her feet. She half screamed, half laughed, until she saw Hyoyeon and Sooyoung walking in front of them, hand in hand. They turned around when they heard Taeyeon's screams and hastily let go of each other's hands. Tiffany and Taeyeon came to a halt right in front of them, and both bent down to regain their breath. "You're insane." "I know."

"Well, thanks for almost killing me." "You're welcome." Taeyeon looked up and saw Sooyoung and Hyoyeon exchange a glance. A look she translated as a look of relief that they weren't discovered. For the first time, Taeyeon wished Sooyoung knew about her and Tiffany. She understood how she must be feeling... Oh, Sooyoung.

They walked back home and nobody held hands.

The rest of the evening was unsurprising in an unexpected way for Taeyeon. Sooyoung was trying to hide her feelings for Hyoyeon from Tiffany and Taeyeon, and Taeyeon felt sorry for her. She wanted to tell her that it was okay, but she also wanted Sooyoung to tell her out of trust... and not because Taeyeon had been... spying on them. The best moment of the rest of the night, for Taeyeon, was when they made the sleeping arrangement. They had Sooyoung's bed and one lonely mattress. "Well, I guess I should... sleep with... I mean next to you, since I'm thinking Taeyeon and Tiffany won't want a stranger beside them while they're sleeping." "I think you're right" Sooyoung answered without so much as looking at Taeyeon. Oh, Sooyoung. But she didn't mind. It meant she would have the whole night beside Tiffany.

She waited until 3 in the morning before she said anything. Both Hyoyeon and Sooyoung were

snoring loudly up in the bed. Taeyeon sat up a little and looked at them. They were completely tangled up in each other. Taeyeon guessed that when they could use sleep as a cover-up, they didn't care enough to try and hide it. She was happy for them. Tiffany turned towards her, eyes open, seemingly fully awake. "You're awake." Tiffany nodded. "So are you." "Well, like I could sleep beside you." "Why not?" Taeyeon thought. "Why would I want to? It would... seem like such a waste." Tiffany smiled. Oh, that smile... "You're sweet." "I know." Tiffany laughed. Oh, that laugh... Taeyeon felt Tiffany pull her close. She put her hand on Tiffany's waist, slowly caressing the skin over her ribs. Tiffany's hand was on her back, pulling her that impossible inch closer. "I'm glad you were there with me tonight. Under the moon." Warm whispers, heating up Taeyeon's cold hands. "I am too." "Do you think you're gonna be able to sleep?" Tiffany stroked her face. "Maybe. A little." Taeyeon had to admit she wasn't tired at all. She couldn't be. Tiffany nodded. "You are so beautiful." The whisper was more silent and so fragile, but it shook Taeyeon's spine. The physical thing called love swelled up so horrifyingly enormous that tears welled up in her eyes. She didn't

know what to answer. "You're one to talk." They spent the remaining night swimming in and out of consciousness. Taeyeon would fall asleep, wake up half an hour later and find Tiffany awake, looking at her. Seeing her smile as she saw Taeyeon's sleepy eyes try to focus on her. She'd fall asleep again and wake up ten minutes later, to see Tiffany sleeping beside her, her eyelids heavy, breathing deeply and softly, her hand locked with Taeyeon's. Eventually, they fell asleep from their dream and slept for the two hours they had left before Sooyoung and Hyoyeon started waking up.

They shot glances at each other over the breakfast table. Too busy thinking to even notice Sooyoung and Hyoyeon's excessive flirting. This was the point when Taeyeon knew she should be devastated. She knew nothing had really changed - they had been so close, but they hadn't even kissed. She knew that if Tiffany had changed her mind, she would have shown it to her, somehow. But they were exchanging looks over the breakfast table... She had never lived that before. It must have meant something. The night had been the best night of her life, but that was it. It was morning, the sun was up, and it had ended. She should be petrified. But she couldn't help it. Tiffany had given her a small sliver of hope. And she knew yet again, something was going to happen.

Chasing the Storm From the Sky (3/3) Taeyeon couldn't understand how it was possible that everything always turned out the way she didn't expect. The night after she confessed should have been their last night. And after the night under the moon, something should have happened. All of a sudden it felt like Tiffany only did things if she knew they would confuse Taeyeon. When one week had passed since they fell asleep holding each other, Taeyeon and Tiffany had spoken once. Taeyeon guessed that Tiffany had taken what she wanted, but now it was definitely over. Compared to the first time it was supposed to have been over, this time hurt a million times more. Taeyeon had got a taste of what she could have had... and what she had lost. And she didn't know what to say, or to who, that could make her feel better. She found the solution was to...not say anything at all. To imagine Tiffany's warm arms around her when she fell asleep at night. To wake up every morning with a smile, and a heavy feeling on her heart when she realised that she didn't actually have Tiffany with her anymore. The physical thing called love seemed to be on a constant overload inside her - aching, making her heart race like crazy, swelling up a million times when she got lost in her fantasies... and eventually making her want to disappear. Somehow she found comfort in the fact that the summer still remained, even if it was starting to come to an end. She spent most of her time out on the porch. Writing. Imagining things she could say to Tiffany, and writing down all the things that she would never tell her. Or anyone else. Sooyoung suspected something was wrong with the girl, of course. She would ask her several times a day why she was so quiet, why she didn't text, didn't call, but Taeyeon didn't know what to say. Would Tiffany have stayed with her, she would gladly have told Sooyoung. But now...

Everything was harder than before. And as she closed her eyes and faced the sun, she tried to convince herself that nothing lasts forever. Those feelings would go away. She didn't doubt that they would, one day. But there was still a question that kept burning inside her, a thought she just could not push out of her head... What was the point? And sometimes the anger came by to visit. With Tiffany, it was always about destiny. She was a strong believer in fate and that everything happened for a reason. She also had an enormous obsession with fairy tales and Disney movies, where there was just no escaping that the two people who were meant for each other would always end up together in the end. Taeyeon laughed at the thought... how many times had she put her arms around Tiffany when the latter had started to tear up when they were restlessly watching The Beauty and the Beast? She wanted to foget her love for Tiffany, but she wouldn't trade their memories for the world. The smell of her hair, the sound of her voice, her smile and laugh. They were everything to her. And it was the only thing from Tiffany she had left.

Of course she had contemplated calling Tiffany many times. She was held back by her own fear of being a burden for Tiffany, cursing herself for her confusion and trying to decide what was the right thing to do. Fight for her? Respect her decision and just let her go? She didn't think she had ever been so confused in her entire life. The suddenness of Tiffany's change of mind left her without knowing how to relate to anything about her.

The cellphone on her nightstand vibrated loudly and Taeyeon woke up with a start. Hating the sound, she glared at the clock. 1 PM. Fantastic. She reached for her phone. Sooyoung's name shone on the display. Taeyeon~ What are you gonna do today? She sat up on the bed, trying to remember what day it was. And if she was going to do anything at all. She slowly stood up, and felt the headrush overwhelm her at once. She sat back down and pulled a little at her grey sweatpants. Saturday. One of the more pleasant days of the week. I don't know... what about you? ...thanks for waking me up by the way, I think I needed it Taeyeon stood up again, relieved with the lack of a headrush, and made her way out to the hallway. Sleeping until now? Oh bad Tae... And oh...I don't know, I think Hyoyeon might come here... Would you... maybe... wanna join? She thought about the offer as she walked up the stairs. Would it feel good to see the two love birds trying to hide their relationship?

...well, actually, yeah. But witness the love they thought they weren't showing? A different question. The reached the top of the stairs and found the second floor to be empty. She walked into the kitchen, where she, like every morning, was blinded by the brightness of the room. White walls. White ceiling. White curtains. Grey floor. She rubbed her eyes and put the phone down on the table, forgetting about Hyoyeon and Sooyoung for a minute. She walked over to the window and absently looked out to the front door, outside which their car was missing. Her family seemed to be... She jumped when her phone vibrated with a loud, dark noise on the table. She put her hand over her heart. "Well, that's Sooyoung texting me again, asking if I'm ignoring her..." she thought and walked over to the table. She picked up her phone, and was close to dropping it a second later. Tiffany Immediately, her heart started pounding heavier than she could stand. She fiddled with the buttons until she finally managed to open the message, feeling her hands become sweaty. I'll be at your place in 10 minutes What? Taeyeon spun around. Did she forget something? Had they talked? Had they decided to meet today? Or was Tiffany just being her regular self? She let her hand fall down to her side as she looked around in the silent room. What the hell am I gonna say? She tried to think of some way to get out of it - any excuse, tell Tiffany she wasn't home, or sick, or busy, or... And it suddenly occured to her that if Tiffany was going to come by just out of the blue... there

must be something she wanted. Wanted to say. Taeyeon's heart didn't want to slow down. For a second, she felt as if she had frozen, but her heart was still warm. She looked down. She was standing there in her pyjamas with her hair in a mess. She shrieked and ran as fast as she could, downstairs, to get some clothes. I am so glad nobody's home right now

Getting dressed, fixing her hair and brushing her teeth didn't take as long as she thought it would. I never noticed 10 minutes actually take this long When she was ready to meet Tiffany, there was still 5 minutes left. Torture. She walked around in her room, trying to sit down on her bed, but it was impossible to stay still. Time, I hate you She ended up jumping up and down on the spot, trying to think of other things, like... movies, or... Tiffany ...music, or... Tiffany ...Sooyoung, or... Tiffany ...her family, or... Anything that had to do with Tiffany. The doorbell rang. And Taeyeon ran.

She stopped in front of the door, regaining her breath, not wanting to look as though she'd seen a ghost... and pushed the door open. She was actually there. The last sliver of doubt that she was gonna turn up disappeared from Taeyeon's mind as she looked out at the beauty in a light blue jacket. "Hi." Taeyeon managed to find her voice. "Hi." Neither of them moved. Taeyeon wasn't sure if she should hug her, or ask her why she was there, or yell at her or let her in... "Are you okay? You look like you've seen a ghost." ...myeah. Taeyeon smiled awkwardly and looked down. "No, I'm fine." And silence. Always so silent. Tiffany shifted her weight between her feet. Taeyeon looked at Tiffany's shoes, before letting her gaze follow Tiffany's darkly jeans-clad legs up to her jacket. "You look hot." Taeyeon resisted putting her hand over her mouth when she realised what words had just come out of it. Tiffany tilted her head. "I mean... that jacket... looks hot. Warm." Well, we're off to a good start "No, not really, it's okay" Tiffany said, smiling at Taeyeon's verbal clumsiness. And silence again. Taeyeon swayed a little where she stood. "Do you... wanna come inside, then?" Taeyeon asked finally. Tiffany just looked at her. "No, actually, I was wondering if we could go for a walk." "A walk?" Taeyeon raised her eyebrows. "Yes, a walk. In the forest." Tiffany smiled with a slightly pleading look on her face. Taeyeon leaned out the door and looked towards the distant forest. She wondered what had gotten into Tiffany.

"Alright... Well, sure." They walked off in silence.

There was nothing Taeyeon hated more than when people kept things from her. When she knew they knew things, and they just wouldn't tell her. When she asked something she really, really wanted to know and the person was slow to answer her. And yet, walking in silence with Tiffany on an old, small road through the forest, when she knew Tiffany was going to tell her something, seemed to make perfect sense. Something was really going to happen. If Tiffany didn't tell her anything, she would ask. She couldn't let this opportunity slip away. She was surprised when Tiffany came to a sudden stop. She looked up the road and realised, to her surprise, that she had no idea where their destination was. "We should sit down here." Tiffany looked around for rocks to sit on. "Here?" "Yes, here." Taeyeon looked at her. "But we're in the middle of the road." "Taetae..." Great, just kill me, why don't you "There's grass actually growing on the road. You do the math." "...Oh." Tiffany laughed, and Taeyeon couldn't help but join in. She watched Tiffany sit down on a rock at the side of the road, and Taeyeon chose one that wasn't too close to her. Silence fell again. Taeyeon picked up a piece of grass and started pulling off little bits of it at a time. "So has Sooyoung told you about Hyoyeon yet?" Taeyeon was almost surprised to hear Tiffany speak.

"No. She keeps doing this thing, like, in the movies, where she says my name in a dramatical tone, makes this long pause, and then finishes with 'what do you wanna eat?'" "I see" Tiffany laughed, and looked down to her lap. Taeyeon picked up another piece of grass from the ground. She carefully looked at Tiffany, but the other girl was still looking down, with a thoughtful look on her face. Taeyeon ripped the grass into little pieces. Listening to the calm breeze in the trees, she felt herself become more and more restless. She shivered a little and wished to go out of the forest where the sun couldn't be hidden by the trees. She let the grass fall to the ground and didn't bother picking up a new one. She looked up in time to see Tiffany take a deep breath. "Taeyeon..." And with that, Taeyeon didn't want to hear Tiffany's shooting-her-down speech. "That's a pretty good impression of Drama Sooyoung, actually." Tiffany didn't say anything. She stood up and walked over to Taeyeon, who didn't look up. "Can I sit with you?" Their eyes met. Tiffany looked hopeless and Taeyeon felt a little guilty. "I guess so." She moved over to the left side of the rock, and Tiffany sat down beside her. Taeyeon heard her take a deep breath. "I understand if you're mad at me." Taeyeon played with her own fingers. Somehow she hadn't expected an apology. "Can you?" she asked. "Yeah. I don't know what I would do if I were you. When the person you're in love with keeps you in the dark... about everything." Taeyeon nodded. She closed her eyes and remembered the night on the beach: the breeze, the both of them sitting pressed against each other on a rock, talking in low voices and not looking at each other. Just staring out in empty space... wasting time.

"I was so close to kissing you that night at Sooyoung's." Taeyeon lost her breath for a second. Her pulse sped up again.

"You... you were?" She turned her head to look at Tiffany for the first time. "I was." "So why didn't you?" Tiffany lowered her head. "Because I knew I was going to hurt you." Something like relief flooded through Taeyeon's body, from Tiffany finally having said something. Something that actually meant something. And still, she was terrified of where it was going. "Believe me" she said, "you kissing me isn't what would hurt. Being that close to you and not kissing you, that's what hurts." Tiffany looked at her again and Taeyeon could almost see a hint of tears in her eyes. "Really?" "Yeah" Taeyeon said and looked down. Tiffany's eyes were too much for her. Not a second passed before Tiffany's hands were on the sides of her face, turning her head and pushing their lips together. Frozen. In exstasy. She didn't believe she could be happier, but then Tiffany's tongue met hers and it was so much more than everything She could feel Tiffany turning her body and move closer to her, and Taeyeon followed her lead and put one leg on each side of the rock they were sitting (floating) on. And there it was, the warmth of Tiffany's body that she had longed for, the warmth that she had considered to be a treasure to even dream of... And she felt Tiffany's hair fall down on her arm, she was struck by the sudden thought I can't wait until I get to breathe in the smell of that hair again and she didn't know where it came from, or why it even mattered, and -And then it was over. Tiffany pulled back slightly and put her hands on Taeyeon's shoulders. Tiffany looked into her

eyes and Taeyeon's mind was filled with fog. She let her hands rest in Tiffany's lap while she composed herself. "See, now... that didn't hurt." Tiffany smiled at her. Taeyeon could help but wonder how that kiss had felt on her lips. "Definitely not." Tiffany let her hands slide down over Taeyeon's arms before locking their fingers together. She looked down. Taeyeon stopped her thoughts for a moment to just see how adoreable Tiffany looked when she was embarrassed. Tiffany looked up. "Taeyeon..." "No." Taeyeon stopped her. "If you're still not going to be with me, then don't drag it out. If you're gonna shoot me down, do it fast. Just say it, and we'll leave it at that." She felt her body relax a little just from saying those words. There would be no more waiting. Tiffany looked at her, but Taeyeon couldn't read the expression on her face. Confusion, determination, sadness, some anger. "I didn't come here to shoot you down." Taeyeon just looked back at her. "You didn't?" She was hoping again, but a part of her kept waiting for signs that this was a joke. "No." Tiffany let go of Taeyeon's hands and stood up. Taken aback, Taeyeon watched her pacing forward and backwards on the road. "See... I... You... Okay." Tiffany stopped for a second and turned towards Taeyeon. "I've been in love with you for about four years, which is the scariest thing I have ever done, by the way." She started pacing again. "Everyday was based on the same question: if you could ever, somehow, feel something for me. But I walked around imagining what it would be like living the rest of my life without you, because I knew... well, I knew that you would never actually like me back." Taeyeon smiled. "So I never really thought about what would happen if you someday just stopped, turned around and said that you wanted to be with me! And all of a sudden, you just start dropping all

these obvious hints, and instead of becoming as happy as I should be, my whole world falls apart." Taeyeon blushed a little at "obvious hints", but kept quiet. "At the moment when I started thinking about what it actually would be like to be with you, I could all of a sudden hear all my friends' voices in my head, talking about gay people, making jokes, being idiots... I freaked out, okay? I freaked out." She stopped for a second and looked down at Taeyeon. "Yeah" Taeyeon whispered, not knowing if Tiffany wanted an answer. She started pacing again. "But then, you tell me you're in love with me, and when I tell you the truth, you tell me that I'm the one living my life, not all of them... And of course I knew that already, but when you said it, it was like... But I was still scared to death, so I couldn't just leave all of that behind. But with those words, you got me doubting all those fears I had. I realised that they were the ones doing something wrong - judging. Not me. And I just wanted to meet you one more time to see what it was like, and I realised just how much I wanted to be with you." Taeyeon felt as if someone had hit her with a sledgehammer. Am I really awake? "And now..." Tiffany continued, oblivious to Taeyeon's daze. "I realise this doesn't exactly put me in the top pot on your people-to-trust list, but..." Taeyeon stood up. Tiffany fell silent and stopped on the spot. "Tiffany..." Taeyeon walked up to her. "Tiffany, I love you." And Tiffany just looked back at her, her eyes slowly filling up with tears. The breeze grew a little stronger around them, making the forest sound endless. Taeyeon couldn't do anything but look back into the beautiful, tear-filled eyes in front of her. "You have no idea how long I've waited to hear you say that." Her tear-filled eyes were smiling. Taeyeon wrapped her arms around the taller girl, and felt the physical thing called love swell up bigger than ever before. A wonderful, desperate need to make Tiffany feel better than she'd ever felt. Taeyeon pulled back from Tiffany, but didn't let her hands leave the other girl's waist.

"Look..." Taeyeon whispered to her. "I understand that you're afraid. I'm not gonna push you." Tiffany held onto Taeyeon's arms. "What do you mean?" "I mean that, we don't have to tell anyone yet. They have nothing to do with this." They looked in each other's eyes, trying to read what the other person was feeling. "Can you do that?" Tiffany's whisper was full of worry. "It might be hard to hide, but the only thing that matters is that we are happy." Another cool breeze pulled at the trees and blew in between the two girls on the road. Taeyeon's hair blew up into the wind, and Tiffany smiled. Her hands travelled up to Taeyeon's face and stopped at her neck. "But... when... when do we tell them?" Taeyeon could tell that this was the part that scared Tiffany the most. The biggest problem. She took a deep breath. "When we feel strong enough to let everyone know." She looked up at Tiffany and smiled shyly. The taller girl looked back at her for a moment, her face showing clearly how she went from fear to relief. They kissed again. "I'm just, if my father finds out about me I don't know what..." "Hey" Taeyeon interrupted the frightened ramble. "He doesn't find out about you, he finds out about us. You and me. Okay? Cause we're together in this." Tiffany's smile was merciless. Taeyeon's heart was about to explode. "How do you do this? You tell me things I already know, and make me understand what they really mean." Taeyeon's turn to smile. She pulled her in for another hug, and whispered in her ear "I know you better than anyone." She held her in silence. They swayed slowly from side to side, letting each other warm them up. A mutual feeling of belonging had fallen around them, and though neither of them spoke about

it, they both knew the other felt it too. "Taetae..." "Yes?" "Thank you." Taeyeon let her hands slowly caress Tiffany's back. "Anytime." She laughed. They swayed together, hearing the wind slowly subside around them. "Do you believe this is really happening?" Taeyeon asked, almost trying to make sure it wasn't just a dream. Tiffany answered with a giggle. "I love you, Taeyeon." And Taeyeon breathed in the scent of Tiffany's hair again. She was going to spend her whole life in Tiffany's embrace and nothing could stop them now.

In another life, maybe we'd see everything in a different light Like an endless summer And in the years from now, we'll all be living the same old certain dream that we imagined would be somewhere high, Somewhere high above the clouds We could live there safe and sound Far away from where we are

Yeah, we'll find our star But maybe, that's another world In another life, we would fall in love, you see And the sun would shine for you and me, yeah Chasing the storm from the sky Altogether, love would come and save us and we would let it take us somewhere high... (Westlife - Another World)

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