BEING HAPPY

BEING HAPPY! A Handbook to Greater Confidence and Security

Author: Andrew Matthews Publisher: Media Masters Date of Publication: 2000 ISBN: 9810006640 No. Of Pages: 136 pages

About the Authors

Wisdom in a Nutshell Every person's ultimate quest in life is to be happy. But more often than not, people struggle finding contentment, peace and happiness in life. This highly motivational book by Andrew Matthews is written to help both young and old to find the path to bliss.

Andrew Matthews An international speaker, bestselling author and award winning cartoonist, Andrew Matthews makes complex issues simple. The author of Being Happy!, Follow Your Heart and Being a Happy Teenager, Andrew Matthews is published in 29 languages in 60 countries and has Andrew has appeared on over 3000 radio and television programmes on 4 continents.

This book entitled Being Happy is about the daily experiences in life and how you can change your attitude towards these to become happy. This book talks about forgiveness, confidence, goals, success, humor, and many more. This teaches you how to deal with the daily problems that you face and how you can address them without spoiling the rest of your day. More importantly, Being Happy will help you embrace yourself with respect and love that you deserve. This will help you understand yourself better. And eventually helps you live life to the fullest.

Andrew Matthews has presented seminars and keynote speeches across Australia, Asia, Europe and North America to over 1,000,000 people. He clients include Shell, Coca-Cola, McDonalds, the S i n g a p o r e Po l i c e A c a d e m y, Johnson & Johnson, the Royal Australian Navy, Toshiba, Kodak and Goodyear. Drawing lighting-fast cartoons as he speaks, Andrew’s humorous and entertaining presentations on "attitude" and "being happy" provide audiences with the tools and inspiration to live happier lives.

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BEING HAPPY

By Andrew Matthews

Chapter 1: Patterns

situations in your respective families that you were exposed to are factors that have influenced and determined the patterns that you have acquired.

Patterns The human mind can be compared to an iceberg. The tip that is visible is the conscious part of the brain, while the bigger part that you don't actually see is the subconscious. The subconscious is the quiet part of the brain that records most of your thoughts and also influences your actions. More often than not, the things that you experience in life, specially the behavior that keeps on coming back, are caused by the subconscious mind.

Your self-image is the blueprint of your success. The habits that you form, be it positive or negative, are patterns in life that you got accustomed to doing or experiencing. Some of these patterns that people get hooked with are: ! Drama Pattern. This is the it-is-not-right-tobe-okay pattern. When things go smoothly, the subconscious tells you that this is not right then something dramatic emerges. ! Accident Pattern. Some people simply have a way of getting into any form of accident whenever there is a chance. ! Sickness Pattern. There are people who have unintentionally scheduled sickness, like monthly flu or Monday headaches. ! Mess Patterns. Some people just can't keep anything in order, they are inclined to being messy all the time. ! Broke Patterns. No matter how much someone makes, there are those who are just always out of money. ! Job Change Patterns. There are those who just can't stay in a single job for a long time. Life patterns are influenced by the environment that you have been introduced to. From birth, you already form behavioral patterns– these are persistent and tenacious. Your childhood experiences, the relationships that you form with your parents and the

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Changing patterns may be difficult. This will always be challenged by resistance. But it is not impossible. The first step is to recognize this recurring behavior that you wish to change. Accept it and believe that you are not stuck with it forever. Simply start talking positively about yourself. Always reassure yourself that you can do better and can change your ways. Sooner enough, you will see yourself creating the new happiness pattern.

Self-Image Your self-image is the blueprint of your success. It determines how you will mix with the world and how much you will accomplish in life. You are what you believe you are. You become what you see yourself becoming. If you want to see vast favorable results happening in your life, you better change the way you perceive and talk about yourself. Though changing your self image is totally difficult, the following are things that you can do to help yourself start over: ! Accept compliments. Always say thank you or words to that effect. ! Give compliments. One of the easiest ways to feel good about yourself is to recognize the

Talk positively to others and to yourself. beauty in others. ! Always speak well of yourself. If you have nothing good to say about yourself, keep your mouth shut. ! Praise yourself. When you do something right, give yourself a pat in the back. Acknowledge your value. ! Separate your behavior from yourself. Realize that your behavior is not connected to

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your self worth. ! Treat your body well. It is the only one you got. Exercise and nourish it well. ! Let people know how you expect to be treated. Don't allow negative behavior. ! Get around good people. Choose the people who can influence you positively. ! Work at having pleasure without guilt. Learn to sincerely enjoy everything that you do. ! Use affirmations. Talk positively to others and to yourself. ! Nourish your soul. Read books which give you ideas and inspiration. ! Always picture your mind how you want to be and not who you are. You will then necessarily gravitate toward your dominant thoughts.

“Your mind is the architect of your body and your body is the reflection of thoughts.”

Health It is definitely fascinating how your subconscious mind shapes your health. Every single thought you have affects your body chemistry in seconds. Some of the belief systems or your expectations can make you sick. Every repressed feeling or emotion can definitely affect how well your bodily function.

positively. Pain is simply a hint for you to take a different direction, change your approach to things and start to see things differently. Don't keep doing things that keep you getting hurt. More importantly, don't allow this experience to destroy the way you see yourself.

Chapter 2: Living in the Now Live, Now! Now is what determines your happiness. The measure of your peace of mind is determined by how well you can focus and able to live at the present moment. Regardless of what happened yesterday or what will happen tomorrow, now is where you are, learn to live it and be content with it. This is the key to your happiness. Learning to live in your “now” helps you ward your mind of fear, for fear is the concern of what might happen next. Always remember, the present moment is the only time you have so don't waste it. Live your life at the present moment and let go of the concerns of the future. If you are waiting for things, try to do something else. Don't waste your time just sitting around and missing the great opportunities just because you are too hooked up with some results that you are not even certain of. Detach yourself from the end result. Remember, letting go of the situation accelerates results.

As Matthews states it, “Your mind is the architect of your body and your body is the reflection of thoughts.” So better think of happy thoughts and start living a healthy and wonderful life.

Pain is simply a hint for you to take a different direction.

Pain While health is something that you can work on about yourself, pain is something that you cannot avoid--it is inevitable. You will experience pain-whether you like it or not. It is not something that you can just run away from or assign to yourself or others. When you experience pain, learn to approach it

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Happiness Being happy is a choice you make. It is a decision that yourself makes. As Abaraham Lincoln once said, “Most people are about as happy as they make up

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BEING HAPPY

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their mind to be.”

on the reverse of an idea.

Some people try to change the world, the environment or the situation that they are in just to be happy and content. But the key to happiness is on how you see things, how well you accept them, and how you learn to see the beauty in them. Sometimes it is not the things around you that you need to change in order to be happy. Sometimes you just need to change yourself.

Therefore, watch what you think. Think positively and implant in your subconscious only the things that you like and the things that make you happy. Visualize yourself already achieving your goals. You will definitely move towards achieving them.

Live your life at the present moment and let go of the concerns of the future.

The Law of Attraction Your mind is like a magnet. It attracts whatever you think about, whether positive or negative. As one of the authors of creative thinking once put it, “We always attract in our lives whatever we think about the most, believe in most strongly, expect on the deepest levels, and/or imagine most vividly.” The same is true with fear. You will certainly attract that fear that usually occupies your mind. When you fear of losing something, you already put yourself in the position of actually losing it.

Humor People have said for years that “laughter is the best medicine.” This timeless adage is biologically and psychology true. When you laugh, your brain releases endorphins which give you a natural high giving your respiratory system a workout the same as jogging. Laughter, therefore, relieves pain. Learn to laugh at difficulties as soon as they happen. As Matthews puts it, “Happy people choose to avoid waiting too long to see the funny side of their disappointments.” Try to put humor in your life and start to take it seriously.

This same law applies to relationships. When you fear of losing that someone you love, you actually put yourself in jeopardy of losing the one you love. So the rule is: concentrate and enjoy what you have and don't dwell on the possibility of losing what you have.

Being happy is a choice you make.

Chapter 3: Your Mind

The Power of Words

Toward the Direction of your Dominant Thoughts

As your thoughts affect your circumstances, so do the words that you say. Simply, what you say is what you get. Therefore it is important that you practice positive affirmations about yourself, your goals, and the things you love to have.

Whether you like to accept it or not, the truth about your thinking is that you gravitate towards the direction of your dominant thoughts. You move toward what you think. You become what you think you are. Even if you are thinking of something that you don't want, you will most likely move towards getting it. Your mind does not work and will not work

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For better understanding, Matthews illustrates the vicious triangle: Our words affect how we think and how we feel. What we think affects what we say and how we feel. How we feel influences what we say and how we think.

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anything. Thus, it is important to learn the art of persistence. This will take you a long way. Don't simply quit. Work hard until you achieve your goals.

Chapter 4: Goals Goals Goals are what keep you going in life. They give you direction, hope and deeper meaning of existence. Goals are what make you see how well you progress, or how badly you are behind.

Chapter 5: Learning From Nature The Law of Nature There are laws and principles that govern the universe which consequently affect people's lives. Take for example the law of gravity. When you let go of a bag of potatoes in your hand, it will naturally drop. There are also the laws that govern the stars, moons and planets that affect the cycle, tides and change of seasons.

Learn to laugh at difficulties as soon as they happen. Goals keep you guided in life, thus it is important to have at least one. It does not matter how big or simple your goal is, what matters most is that you have one. It will definitely not hurt if you keep many goals in life. Just be sure to write them down. This helps you keep on track.

Risk Naturally, people always take risks. Be it in daily living, careers or relationships, there are always risks involved. You also risk something even in achieving goals. There is always a risk involved in your every attempt to achieve your goal. Nature simply puts it that in order for you to gain something, you need to risk something. So don't be afraid to take risks. Let down your guard sometimes and be ready to welcome new things.

Persistence In achieving your goals, the name of the game is always persistence. Persistence is what defines a mediocre from an excellent person. This defines also the difference between failure and success. Persistence is the secret to success. Successful people believe it as the main ingredient to achieving

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We are bound by the same laws that govern the universe. We are all part of the natural cycle and the changes of the seasons. Thus it is important that we keep balance as the rest of nature do. We need to take time to grow and heal, to rest and recuperate just like all the other living things.

Your mind is like a magnet. It attracts whatever you think about, whether positive or negative. ! Taking Time. Just as the acorn tree takes its time to be a full grown tree, so does your confidence building. Things just don't happen overnight. ! Cycles. As sure as the winter flows to spring, so must your life flow from bad times to easy times. Just always remember, the tide always turn. ! Rest. Don't think of yourself as indispensable. You need rest just as much as soils do. Relax and Let go (go with the flow) One character that truly defines living in the moment

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is Winnie the Pooh. He has this easy, accepting and uncomplicated philosophy in life. He doesn't try that hard, he just is. Hoof writes in his book the “Tao of Pooh”: “When we learn to work with our own Inner Nature, and with the natural laws operating around us, we reach the level of Wu Wei. Then we work in the natural order of things and operate on the principle of minimal effort. Since the natural world follows that principle, it does not make mistakes. Mistakes are made--or imagined--by Man, the creature with the overloaded Brain who separates himself from the supporting network of manual laws by interfering and trying too hard.”

If you let go of the results, you free yourself of the burdens and worries of what will be.

people come and go. Be open to new things. This is how nature does it. Always be ready for change.

Chapter 6: Today is Important What you are today is the product of what you have done years ago. And what you do today will influence what you will experience in the next twenty years or so. Life just doesn't happen overnight. It is a building process. Your effort today will create your tomorrow's results. You may go on with being casual and careless for a while today, but this will surely catch up with you in the future. The decisions that you make today, the practices that you do, the way you spend your money, and every little thing will soon affect yourself and the way you live. The wisdom here: now is always the time to start-regardless of wherever you are or what you have already done in life. Remember that the effort that you expend today does make the difference.

Learning to let go is your ultimate key to happiness. If you let go of the results, you free yourself of the burdens and worries of what will be. You then ultimately learn to savor the “now” and live in your present moment. Once you learn to let go, you put yourself in a position to greater power. People who work unattached to the concern of how much they will make but are just driven by their love for their work turn out to earn bigger than others. People who are least concerned about making an impression are usually free of depression. Once you have done the work, take time to relax and let nature takes its course. Simply learn to let go and go with the flow. Take time out. In the same way, it is important to learn the art of releasing. Let go of the things that you don't want or the things that do not make you happy. Don't hold on tight to the people around you. Accept that Copyright 2006

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