Awareness to Action Coaching

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“Awareness!! to!! Action! Coaching”! " By"Mario"Sikora"

Copyright*2012.*Mario*Sikora* www.awarenesstoaction.com*

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For"more"information"about"the"Enneagram,"visit"www.enneagramlearning.com." " For"more"information"about"consulting"and"executive"coaching,"visit" wwwe.awarenesstoaction.com."

Awareness!to!Action!Coaching! An#Approach#to#Using#the#Enneagram# By"Mario"Sikora"

" There"are"two"basic"approaches"to" coaching,"as"there"are"to"many"things:" the"tactical"approach"and"the"strategic" approach."The"tactical"approach" focuses"on"behaving"differently—stop" doing"this,"start"doing"that."The" strategic"approach"takes"a"broader" view,"focusing"on"patterns"of"thinking" that"influence"our"behavior"and" modifying"those"patterns"so"that"it"is" easier"to"change"behaviors"with"great" longBterm"success."" " An"effective"coach"uses"both" approaches."Sometimes"a"client"simply" needs"a"quick"fix,"a"new"behavior"that" they"simply"hadn’t"thought"of"before." For"example,"recently"I"was"working" with"an"executive"who"liked"to"catch" up"on"email"late"at"night."The"problem" is"that"while"it"is"a"convenient"time"for" her"to"work,"it"made"her"subordinates" feel"that"they"should"also"be"working" at"that"time,"and"that"they"needed"to" respond"to"the"boss’s"emails" immediately."This"meant"they"were" staying"up"past"midnight"responding" to"emails"that"could"easily"wait"until" the"next"day."The"simple"tactical" advice"I"gave"her"was"to"use"the"draft" folder—write"the"emails"at"night"and" send"them"in"the"morning."It"was"a" simple"solution"to"a"problem"that"she" could"easily"adopt." " Often,"however,"behavioral"change"is" more"complicated"than"a"simple"

tactical"switch."Many"times"clients"are" unable"to"do"something"that"they" already"know"they"should"be"doing." They"know"they"should"be"more" patient"with"a"particular"subordinate," for"example,"or"perhaps"be"more" comfortable"asserting"themselves"in"a" seniorBlevel"staff"meeting."Something" keeps"them"from"making"the"change," however;"in"their"head"they"know"they" should"behave"in"a"different"way,"but" something"in"their"gut"keeps"them" from"changing."This"is"usually"because" they"are"experience"some"kind"of" cognitive"dissonance—they"genuinely" believe"that"the"change"would"be" beneficial,"but"they"hold"an"even" stronger"belief"that"causes"an"internal" conflict"regarding"the"change."In"these" situations,"the"stronger"belief"will"win" and"the"new"behavior"will"be"difficult" to"incorporate."(For"example,"a"Six" may"understand"at"an"intellectual" level"that"they"need"to"take"more" risks,"but"their"deepBseated"need"for" security"will"undermine"their"efforts" to"do"so.)" " The"Enneagram"is"an"excellent"tool"for" coaches,"but"it"is"easy"to"see"the"model" as"a"guide"to"tactical"changes—“If"you" are"a"Five,"you"need"to"connect"to" other"people"more;”"“if"you"are"a"Six," you"need"to"overcome"your"fears;”"etc."" " There"is"nothing"wrong"with"these" nuggets"of"tactical"advice,"but"if"the"

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coach"focuses"on"the"“what"to"do”" without"resolving"the"“why"to"do”" obstacles,"they"are"merely"skimming" across"the"surface"and"any"changes" that"a"client"is"able"to"make"will"likely" be"shortBlived."Coaches"operating"this" way"miss"the"true"value"of"the" Enneagram—helping"people"expose" and"resolve"unconscious"conflicting" commitments."Trying"to"make"tactical" changes"without"resolving"the" cognitive"dissonance"is"like"trying"to" implant"an"organ"from"a"donor"with" the"wrong"blood"type;"the"host"will" reject"the"change"in"a"short"time." Resolving"these"commitments"helps" clients"change"their"story"about"the" world,"reducing"cognitive"dissonance" and"creating"fertile"ground"for"the" change"to"take"place."" " The"rest"of"this"article"will"discuss" how"to"incorporate"the"Enneagram"in" a"strategic"way"and"provide"a"brief" overview"of"my"approach"to"coaching," an"approach"I"call"“Awareness"to" Action"Coaching.”"(“Awareness"to" Action"Coaching”"takes"it’s"name"from" the"book"I"coauthored"with"Robert" Tallon,"“Awareness"to"Action:"The" Enneagram,"Emotional"Intelligence" and"Change,”"which"describes"the" Awareness"to"Action"change"process." The"“Awareness"to"Action"Coaching”" program"and"approach"I"offer"through" Enneagram"Learning"International," however,"is"a"significant"expansion"of" that"model.)" " At"the"heart"of"all"strategic"coaching" interventions"is"helping#the#client# switch#from#short5term#solutions#to# long5term#problems#to#long5term# solutions#to#those#same#problems." Understanding"the"EnneaBtypes"as" manifestations"to"an"overreliance"on"a"

particular"adaptational"strategy"helps" to"identify"what"shortBterm"solutions" the"client"is"relying"on"and"it"can"be" used"to"help"the"client"develop"more" effective"longBterm"solutions." " Good"strategic"coaching"is"grounded" in"the"effective"use"of"solid"heuristics."" Heuristics"are"mental"models"or"“rules" of"thumb”"that"help"to"guide"our" thinking"in"solving"problems."Good" heuristics"help"us"narrow"down"the" possible"causes"of"the"problem"and" provide"a"structure"for"creating" solutions."As"the"term"“rule"of"thumb”" implies,"heuristics"are"not"fixed"laws," they"are"useful"approximations."Good" heuristics"can"be"invaluable"aids"to" our"thinking,"but"they"should"never"be" counted"on"to"work"in"every"situation."" " The"“Awareness"to"Action"Coaching”" program"centers"on"a"series"of" EnneagramBbased"models"that"have" proven"to"be"useful"to"me"in"my"work" with"leaders."These"models"help" narrow"down"the"highBprobability" obstacles"to"the"clients"growth,"and" once"we"understand"the"obstacles"we" can"apply"the"Awareness"to"Action" process"in"removing"them."" " Those"models"are:"" • The"Three"Instinctual"Biases" • The"Nine"Strategies" • The"Nine"Accelerators" • The"Nine"Core"Qualities" " In"addition,"the"program"incorporates" the"leadership"models"described"in"my" article,""“Awareness"to"Action" Leadership”" (http://mariosikora.blogspot.com/p/ awarenessBtoBactionBleadership.html)." In"a"sense,"the"models"in"ATA" Leadership"identify"what"leaders"

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should"be"focused"on"improving;"the" models"in"ATA"Coaching"provide"the" coach"tools"for"helping"them"do"so." " It"is"important"to"note"here"that"the" coach"should"always"be"focused"on"the" change"the"client"needs"to"make" whether"it"fits"with"the"coach’s" assumptions"about"the"client"or"not." For"example,"it"is"easy"to"assume"that" because"someone"is,"say,"a"Two,"they" will"need"to"focus"on"taking"care"of" their"own"needs."After"all,"Twos"are" often"viewed"as"selfless"helpers"who" are"always"worrying"about"others" instead"of"themselves."This"is"not" always"the"case,"however;"many"Twos" receive"feedback"from"others"that"they" are"actually"too"focused"on"their"own" needs"and"that"they"seem"insincere"in" their"attempts"to"help"others."I" recommend"that"the"coach"always"try" to"get"some"kind"of"objective"feedback" on"their"clients"(say,"through"a"360B degree"assessment)"and"focus"the" intervention"around"the"real"needs" rather"than"start"focusing"on"issues" that"some"book"says"people"of"a"given" type"should"work"on." " That"said,"I"have"noticed"a"patter"of" common"derailers"that"seem"to"appear" time"and"again"in"each"of"the"EnneaB types."Being"aware"of"these"derailers" not"only"helps"the"coach"be"on"the" lookout"for"particular"patterns"of" behavior,"they"can"be"very"useful"in" helping"to"assess"EnneaBtype."For" more"of"this,"please"see"Appendix"D"of" “Awareness"to"Action.”" " The!Three!Instinctual!Biases! I"have"written"in"other"places"about" the"importance"of"understanding"the" instincts"for"coaches."(You"can"find"an" article"at"http://www.eB

junkie.com/shop/product/468474.ph p"or"view"a"series"of"videos"at" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R tEecjPBsTM&list=UUee48kwcjLl8gcaC z58BJoA&index=5&feature=plcp.)" Suffice"it"to"say"here"that"the"instincts" are"at"least"as"important"as"the"EnneaB types"in"helping"clients"get"unstuck," and"I"will"write"more"on"them"in" future"articles." " For"this"article,"I"will"just"point"out"a" couple"of"things"about"the"instincts:"" " First,"I"use"different"names"for"the" instincts"than"are"normally"used"in"the" Enneagram"world."This"is"partly"due" to"the"awkwardness"of"the"term" “sexual"subtype,”"but"it"is"also"due"to" my"feeling"that"the"existing"names" don’t"capture"the"full"scope"of"the" phenomena"at"work"in"these"domains." Thus,"I"refer"to"them"as"“Preserving,”" “Navigating,”"and"“Transmitting”" rather"than"traditional"“SelfB Preservation,”"“Social,”"and"“Sexual”" (or"“oneBtoBone”)." " Second,"there"seems"to"be"a" predictable"relationship"to"the" instincts;"if"I"know"which"instinct"is" dominant"I"also"know"which"one"is" underBdeveloped"and"which"one"is"a" shadow"issue."This"is"a"tremendous" aid"to"a"coach." " The!Nine!Strategies! " Along"with"the"instincts,"I"immediately" try"to"understand"the"role"the"nine" strategies"play"in"hindering"my"client’s" attempt"to"change."Neither"the"instinct" nor"strategy,"or"even"both"of"them" together,"will"be"the"root"of"every" developmental"challenge"a"client"is" facing,"but"they"are"the"root"of"a"

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disproportionate"number"of"problems" " so"it"is"useful"to"look"at"them"first."" Each"strategy"is"represented"by"a"nonB " conscious"need"to"feel"a"certain"way." I"was"inspired"to"think"about"the" This"affective"need"shapes"the"way"we" EnneaBtypes"as"the"result"of"strategies" think,"which"in"turn"influences"our" when"reading"Claudio"Naranjo’s" behavioral"choices"and"perception"of" “Character"and"Neurosis,”"in"which"he" the"world."The"Six,"for"example,"is" briefly"refers"to"the"them"as" “striving"to"be"secure;”"they"need"to" “adaptational"strategies.”"He"writes" feel"secure,"they"think"in"ways"that" that"it"is"“a"learning"under"duress" increase"their"security,"and"thus"they" characterized"by"a"special"fixity"or" behave"in"ways"that"they"believe"will" rigidity"of"what"behavior"was"resorted" increase"their"security."Understanding" to"in"the"initial"situation"as"an" this"is"a"critical"starting"point"in" emergency"response”"(p.6B7)."He" shaping"a"coaching"strategy"for"the" doesn’t"say"much"more"about"this"idea" client." but"it"stuck"in"my"mind"and"became" " the"kernel"around"which"my"view"of" The"nine"strategies"are"listed"in"Table" the"types"grew." 1. " " TABLE 1: The Nine Strategies ! One

! Striving!to!be!Perfect"

Two

Striving!to!be!Connected"

Three

Striving to be Outstanding

Four

Striving!to!be!Unique"

Five

Striving!to!be!Detached"

Six!

Striving!to!be!Secure"

Seven!

Striving!to!be!Excited""

Eight!

Striving!to!be!Powerful"

Nine!

Striving!to!be!Peaceful"

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" The"central"problem"we"have"when"it" comes"to"creating"change"is"that"we" develop"behaviors"and"attitudes"that" worked"early"in"life"as"responses"to" shortBterm"problems"and,"because"the" brain"likes"to"simplify"life"by"fixing"on" a"solution"that"seems"to"work,"those" responses"became"habits"that" sometimes"prove"ineffective"later"in" life."For"example,"the"Six’s"risk" aversion"is"a"good"shortBterm"solution" to"helping"him"feel"more"secure"when" he"is"younger"but"it"can"hold"him"back" later"in"life"and"perhaps"even" jeopardize"his"career."The"shortBterm" solution"becomes"a"longBterm" hindrance." " Once"the"coach"understands"the"way" the"strategy"is"distorting"the"client’s" view,"the"coach"can"apply"the" Awareness"to"Action"process"as"I"have" described"it"previously"(see"article" here"http://www.eB junkie.com/mariosikora/product/467 083.php#Notes+and+the+Melody+4" or"video"here" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H BOCyZA8uyI&feature=channel)" " At"the"heart"of"the"Awareness"to" Action"process"is"the"idea"that"by" rewriting"the"way"the"client"defines" their"preferred"strategy"they"can" change"their"story"about"the"world" and"change"from"being"trapped"in" shortBterm"behaviors"that"undermine" longBterm"solutions"to"facing"the" world"in"a"way"that"is"flexible,"open," and"responsive"to"the"circumstances" at"hand."Continuing"with"Type"Six"as" an"example,"the"client"may"rewrite" their"understanding"of"the"strategy" from"“avoiding"risk"will"keep"me" secure”"to"“if"I"don’t"learn"to"take"

some"degree"of"risk"I"will"be"less" effective"at"work,"which"will"really" threaten"my"security"because"I"might" get"fired.”" " Understanding"this"rewriting"of"the" strategy"will"help"coaches"avoid" failure"caused"by"a"focus"on"tactical" fixes"so"common"in"the"Enneagram" literature."I"must"rewrite"the"story— change"the"way"I"think—before"a" mere"tactical"change"will"be"able"to" take"root."If"I"believe"at"some"level"that" the"new"behavior"will"undermine"my" strategy—my"trusted"and"reliable"way" of"approaching"life—I"will"ultimately" abandon"that"behavior." " Change"occurs"not"by"trying"to"be" something"different"than"we"are"but" from"a"gradual"process"of"redefining" our"preferred"strategy"so"we"are"able" to"be"adaptive"rather"than"stuck"in" outmoded"views"of"the"world."" " The#Connecting#Points# " In"“Awareness"to"Action,”"we"referred" to"the"strategy"found"at"one’s" Enneagram"point"the"preferred# strategy"because"it"is"the"one"that"we" rely"on"most"commonly"as"a"nonB conscious"default"pattern."That"is,"it"is" our"preferred#strategy"for"solving" problems."People"familiar"with"the" Enneagram"know"that"there"is"a" significance"to"the"connecting"points" of"the"diagram."We"referred"to"the" connecting"points,"commonly"referred" to"as"the"stress"and"security"points,"as" the"support"and"neglected"strategies." Our"rationale"for"this"reflects"the"bias" of"a"coach—we"get"into"trouble"when" we"fall"back"on"the"support"strategy"to" reinforce"our"preferred"strategy"or"

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when"we"neglect"a"strategy"that"could" be"useful"to"us"at"a"given"time."The" developmental"goal"is"not"to"be"more" like"one"type"or"less"like"another,"it"is" to"learn"to"use"the"strategies"in"a" healthy,"adaptive"way"rather"than" avoid"them"or"use"them" maladaptively."" " A"fixated"Nine,"for"example,"who’s" preferred"strategy"is"“striving"to"be" peaceful,”"will"overuse"this"strategy," neglect"to"use"the"strategy"at"point" Three"of"striving"to"be"outstanding"at" critical"times"when"the"strategy"is" called"for,"or"fall"back"on"the"strategy" at"point"Six"of"“striving"to"be"secure”" in"maladaptive"ways"in"order"to"help" them"maintain"a"feeling"of"being" peaceful."As"a"coach"working"with"a" Nine,"I"would"be"looking"out"for"these" patterns"and"helping"the"client"rewrite" their"strategies"so"they"can"be"used" appropriately."" " " The!Core!Qualities! " Again,"the"strategies"heuristic"does" not"address"every"problem."Another" model"I"use"is"what"I"call"the"“core" qualities,”"fundamental"aspects"of"the" human"condition"that"become"stunted" in"our"childhood."Very"often,"the"client" is"not"aware"of"how"this"stunting"of" the"core"qualities"affects"them,"but" when"stress"builds"and"they"are" " "

particularly"selfBreflective,"they"will" see"how"the"stunting"has"left"them" feeling"deficient"and"vulnerable." " Again,"I’ll"refer"the"reader"to"a" previous"article"(http://www.eB junkie.com/mariosikora/product/467 082.php#Notes+and+the+Melody+5)" and"rather"than"go"into"the"core" qualities"in"detail"here"I"will"refer"the" reader"to"that"article."The"nine"core" qualities"are"listed"in"Table"2."" " The"model"of"the"core"qualities"helps" the"coach"further"refine"what"issues" may"be"obstacles"to"the"growth"of"the" client."Continuing"on"with"EnneaBType" Nine,"as"a"coach"I"know"to"be"on"the" lookout"for"issues"related"to"the" quality"at"point"Nine"and"the" connecting"points"of"Three"and"Six."I" know"that"there"is"a"high"probability" that"the"stunting"of"these"three" qualities"is"an"issue"that"needs"to"be" addressed."I"know"that"at"a"deep"level," a"level"the"client"may"not"be"often" aware"of,"they"feel"that"in"they"are"in" some"way"deficient"in"benevolence" (the"feeling"of"being"basically"good)," value"(a"feeling"of"inherent"worth" independent"of"accomplishment),"and" will"(the"confidence"in"one’s"ability"to" survive"and"prevail"over"one’s" circumstances)."This"knowledge"helps" me"better"understand"the"internal" obstacles"the"client"faces"and"how"to" help"the"client"overcome"them.

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TABLE 2: The Core Qualities ! One

! Objectivity"

Two

Compassion"

Three

Value

Four

Individuality"

Five

Intuition"

Six!

Will"

Seven!

Joy"

Eight!

Vitality"

Nine!

Benevolence"

" " " The!Accelerators! " The"dilemma"with"the"core"qualities"is" that"they"are"not"something"that"you" can"force"to"grow."They"were"stunted" in"childhood"and"need"time"to"grow"to" maturity."The"analogy"that"I"use"is"that" they"are"like"sapling"on"its"way"to" becoming"an"oak"tree;"you"can’t"pull" on"the"sapling"to"make"it"grow"but"you" can"create"an"environment"that"will" nurture"its"development."This"is" where"the"fourth"model,"the" accelerators,"comes"into"play." " The"Accelerators"are"practices" particularly"useful"to"people"of"the" correlated"EnneaBtype."Practicing"the"

accelerators"helps"us"grow"and"be" more"flexible,"but"in"particular"it"helps" us"create"a"state"of"mind"that"helps"the" core"qualities"mature."(The"complete" list"appears"in"Table"3.)" " Again,"using"EnneaBtype"Nine"as"our" example,"the"client"would"benefit"from" practicing"generativity"(cultivating"the" next"generation"through"coaching," mentoring,"etc.),"purpose"(clearly" defining"and"articulating"the"“why”"of" their"life),"and"faith"(acting"with" confidence"today"based"on"evidence"of" past"performance)." " "

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TABLE 3: The Nine Accelerators ! One

! Acceptance"

Two

Empathy"

Three

Purpose

Four

Individuation"

Five

Conscious!Practice"

Six!

Faith"

Seven!

Enjoyment"

Eight!

SelfMDiscipline"

Nine!

Generativity"

" " " Putting!it!Together! " Combining"the"strategies,"core" qualities,"and"accelerators"gives"the" coach"a"very"robust"model"of"what" obstacles"hinder"each"EnneaBtype" from"creating"change"and"a"clear" action"plan"for"overcoming"those" obstacles."Charts"that"show"these" elements"combined"into"diagnostic" and"remedial"charts"for"EnneaBtype" Nine"are"shown"in"Figures"1"and"2." " Part"of"the"“Awareness"to"Action" Coaching"Program”"is"learning"how" to"apply"the"nine"diagnostic"and" remedial"charts"in"work"with"a"

client."The"diagnostic"charts"serve"as"a" primer"of"things"to"watch"out"for" while"the"remedial"charts"provide"a"

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guide"for"what"to"do"about"the" problems"the"coach"identifies." " One"should"not"assume"equal" importance"in"all"nine"issues" shown"on"the"diagnostic"charts;" at"any"given"time"one"or"a"few"of" the"issues"will"be"acute"and"the" others"are"of"less"concern."The" chart"is"meant"as"a"reminder"to" the"coach"of"obstacles"to"watch" out"for"during"an"engagement."" " Likewise,"the"Remedial"Chart" shown"in"Figure"2"is"not"meant" as"a"recipe"for"working"with"a" strategic"and"tactical"levels."The" Nine;"most"coaching"engagements"are" models"described"here"help"the"client" far"too"short"to"allow"for"working"on" modify"the"way"he"or"she"thinks"about" all"of"these"issues."It"is"meant"as"a" the"world,"learning"to"seek"longBterm" guide"for"the"coach"to"appropriate" solutions"rather"than"shortBterm" corrective"action"once"the"diagnosis"is" solutions"to"the"developmental" made."" challenges"they"face."Combining"it" " with"the"Awareness"to"Action" While"no"model"is"complete,"I"have" Leadership"model" found"that"there"are"few"obstacles"to" (http://enneagramlearning.blogspot.c growth"whose"removal"cannot"be" om/2012/03/awarenessBtoBactionB hastened"by"use"of"the"charts," leadership.html)"adds"a"tactical"(or" combined"with"a"knowledge"of"the" “whatBtoBdo”)"element"to"the"coach’s" dynamics"of"the"instinctual"biases."" work"with"his"or"her"clients.""" " " "" In"future"articles"I"will"talk"about"some" Summary! of"the"qualities"that"a"good"coach" " should"have."" Awareness"to"Action"Coaching"is"a" " robust,"EnneagramBbased"approach"to" Stay"tuned…." working"with"clients"at"both"the" " (For#more#information#on#the#how#to#attend#the#“Awareness#to#Action#Coaching”# training#program,#contact#me#at#[email protected].)# " "

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